Oh good lord what have we done?!
Oh good lord what have we done?!
Giving Artemis a headache would have been enough... Giving Artemis a concussion would have been enough… Giving Artemis a charbroiling would have been enough…
Giving him an amputation, however, was too flipping much!
Time slows to a crawl as I watch the bloodless mutilation take place before me, and as Red Gala’s face warps in horror as she realizes her mistake. With momentum still carrying her through the terrible act, making stopping impossible, my friend slides helplessly over the stallion's head before floping unceremoniously on the floor beside him.
BOOOOOOOM!!!
She didn’t stay there long though, as not even a second later an ENORMOUS burst of arcanic energy erupts forth from the alicorn's now hornless form; resulting in an explosive backfiring that ripped the stallion clean from his bindings, and me clean off my feet. My purse strap snaps in the issuing chaos, scattering its contents throughout the room along with the contents of what I can only assume was once Artemis’ aforementioned dimensional pocket. Bits, scrolls, tomes, a sheathed blade, and various other doodads twirled in the very air around us, bludgeoning pony and dragon alike in a typhoon of uncontrolled mana and hyper-unstable ether.
… Fhump
Eventually, after several grueling minutes, the magic supporting the storm died out, allowing all three of us to collapse to the floor in a largely disorganized heap. Objects then fell to the ground soon after, resulting in glass smashing, pages scattering, and Butter’s animal’s making various scared noises from upstairs... Beyond that though, there was only silence.
None of us dared move.
…
...
… After a time, I rediscovered my voice.
“Red... Did… D-did you seriously just kick the godhood out of Artemis?!”
From a far off corner of the ruined laboratory, I hear a muffled “Eeyup” buried deep below the debris.
“...”
“...”
“... Red… I love you… but what the actual buck?”
I think I then heard a small “Didn’t mean to” come from the pile, or maybe it was a small “Language” warning... either way, I wasn’t granted the opportunity to hear more.
Before I could, Artemis popped up out of his own pile, and proceeded to slap his forehead like a pony possessed.
“N-no no no no!” he screams madly, feeling around for an appendage that simply wasn’t there anymore. “What did thou do what did thou do what did thou do?!”
“You know, I was just asking myself the same thing,” I answer back from my junk cocoon. Lacking the energy to pull myself out, nor the willpower to acknowledge how badly Red and I had just messed up, I gaze upwards towards the ceiling in a pathetic bid to not start screaming...
... We dehorned Artemis.
We dehorned Artemis...
…
… I really hope they serve gemstones and apples in Tartarus.
Gulp
Removing himself from his hill of garbage, Artemis starts panickily searching the darkened basement for… well take a wild guess.
Click
Having been the second of us to rise out of our funk, Red Gala uses the light switch by the entrance to illuminate the room, making Artemis’ hunt vastly easier to accomplish. Standing up shortly after from my own mini-prison, I skedaddle to Red’s side as we together watch the stallion continue his frenzied search.
After a while, he at last found what he was looking for:
His horn.
Cradling the ivory spike like a newborn foal, the stallion makes a sad attempt to reattach the thing to his temple… only for the cracks not to match its now smooth surface. Unbeknownst to him, there was no scar where the horn had once stood proudly.
In fact, to the uninformed observer; Artemis was now, by all accounts, just a normal looking pegasus pony.
◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠
Unicorn, and by extension alicorn, horns are quite unique when compared to the ones possessed by other horn bearing races such as oxen, dragons, and minotaurs.
To these three examples losing a horn can be annoying, but ultimately not life changing. Even other magically inclined races, such as the rare deer folk, fear not having their appendages stricken from them. In fact, losing and growing new horns is a natural part of the life cycles of several unique species scattered throughout this vast world.
This is not the case with ponies though.
Losing a horn to them means losing it for life.
◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠
“...”
“...”
“... Soooo… Ummmm… M-my bad?”
Artemis whips furious eyes towards me, and angrily stomps his way over.
“My big bad,” I eep, backing up against a wall. “My super duper big bad!”
A girlish scream escapes my lips as the livid pony approaches ever closer...
Clipclopclipclop
... but Red Gala quickly stands in his way.
“Nnope,” she tells the former alicorn resolutely, matching the pony’s death glare point for point. “Nnope.”
“She just ruined us, girl,” Artemis hisses at Red, meeting her eye level only halfway.
“Nnope; ah did, yer majesty,” Red fires back, undaunted. “Only mistake Barb made was in hoofin' out more second chances than you rightfully deserved.”
Artemis wings rise in an attempt to be intimidating…
… though his pouty face made it difficult for either of us to take him seriously.
“When brother hears of this,” he starts to threaten.
“He’ll laugh in your face and ask what you were doing in Ponyville,” I interject from behind Red’s hindleg, reminding the stallion of what he had clearly forgotten. “I was trying to be nice by not getting him involved, but I guess we can’t avoid it now.”
“What are thee...” Artemis cocks his head towards me, absorbing my words, only to then gasp upon realizing what I’m implying. “The moon! Brother will have to raise it for us now!”
“Yeah,” I nod, feeling a pinch sorry for the dude… but only a pinch. “Let the record show that I tried to warn you, multiple times.”
Again I’m granted a dirty look for my comment, and again Red steps in between the two of us.
“... N-no no no no,” Artemis repeats his madness mantra, pacing in circles. “No no no no, this can’t be happening!”
“You’re telling me,” I reply back, knowing full well that he wasn’t talking to me directly anymore. “Pretty sure you still had your horn in the episod-, er, visions that haven’t come to pass yet.”
Artemis pauses thanks to this.
“... Visions…?” he asks himself, mulling the word over. “Visions… images… reflections... dreams…”
Suddenly his expression morphs from spiteful to contemplative.
I think he just had an idea.
Before either Red or myself could ask what was on his mind, the stallion abruptly hugged his horn tightly to his chest and closed his eyes in deep thought. Unsure how to respond, we watch quietly as Artemis does… whatever it is he’s doing.
…
…
… T-twinkle twinkle twink-...
Red and I share a gasp as both the disembodied horn, and Artemis' cutie mark, gives off a dim blue glow; one that lasted all of two seconds.
The pony himself re-opened his eyes shortly thereafter.
“We can connect to the moon through the Dream Realm,” he reveals with a pleasant looking smile, only for it to droop almost immediately. "Or, at least faintly we can. Should be able to bring in the night this eve with relative ease... lowering it tomorrow though might prove difficult… hmmm...”
Still thinking deeply, the alico-, er, pegasus chooses not to elaborate further.
“Is this, umm... p-permanent?” I at last build up the nerve to ask, dreading the answer.
Princess Luna may not have been in many of the episodes I watched during my time as a human, but I doubt she ended up being a non-entity. Losing her magic… I can’t even imagine how badly such a thing would mess up the future!
Instead of replying right away, Artemis places a hoof on his chest and shuts his eyes. Once more, after a brief pause, he exits what I can only assume was the Dream Realm and provides me his thoughts.
“The ability to Dream Walk hasn’t left us, but the rest of our magic seems to have restructured itself to match that of a common pegasus,” he attempts to explain, and I attempt to follow along the best I can; Prince Solaris once told me that even earth ponies can Dream Walk, so that first reveal doesn't surprise me all that much. “The weakened state the Elements reduced us to is what allowed us to be… changed, as such," Artemis coughs, now conspicuously avoiding eye contact with Red. "Perhaps completing our healing will restore us in a manner reminiscent of our first ascension… b-but we’re uncertain...
"... All we are certain of is that Ponyville lacks the means to accommodate our restoration, thus we will depart it posthaste.”
Wait what?
“J... J-just like that?!” I can’t help but ask, unnerved by the very suggestion. “Now you want to leave peacefully?!”
Artemis snorts tiredly in reply.
“Would thee rather have us stay here, and facilitate the need to explain our new condition to both Sir Dusk Shine and brother?” he questions back, clearly just as done with this whole day as I am.
“... Point taken,” I willingly fold, accepting the small mercy for what it is. “Guess it's okay for you to go now anyways," I continue, running scenarios in my head one final time as I do. "You've made it painfully clear that you don't want to disappoint Solaris in any fashion, and it's not like you can actually hurt me anymore without your magic... right?”
“Not unless thy sadistic partner will allow us to hug thee long enough to drag thy consciousness into the Dream Realm.”
“Nnope,” responds Red Gala pretty much instantly.
“Then we have thusly been fully defanged,” Artemis declares with a loud groan, at last accepting the loss. “Huzzah…”
“...”
“...”
“... Er… Does... D-does either of thee have spare currency for a train ticket?” the former alicorn then asks sheepishly. “We had originally teleported most of the way here...”
Clank clank
Not giving me the opportunity to respond, Red throws a small collection of bits on the floor.
“Take and git,” the farmer orders the Prince, pointing to the offered money on the ground. “Don’t come back now, ya hear?”
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Artemis scoffs as he accepts the coinage. “With our luck we’d probably lose a wing the next time our path crosses with young Barbara’s.”
Staring silently soon after, Red and I make no movements, and offer no comments, as Prince Artemis struggles for a time with picking up the bits with his teeth. Once he was able to slide them into his tail for safe keeping, he then took a moment to scavenge the collection of junk around us for his things and shove them into a makeshift hobo satchel along with his horn.
Scanning the room one final time to make sure he had grabbed everything, Artemis grants the two of us a passing glance before flying up the stairs and leaving the laboratory outright.
“...”
“...”
“... Well,” I start to say.
My words are cut off by the sudden reappearance of Artemis.
“Where did thee leave our cloak?” he yells from upstairs.
“It’s on the coat rack next to the front door!” I yell back.
“Ahh… Many thanks.”
Again he leaves.
“...”
“...”
“... Well-”
Again he reappears.
“Our travel satchel tore open,” he reports gloomily. “Would Sir Dusk Shine perhaps have an old saddle bag that he no longer requires?”
“Second floor, first closet!”
“Ah… The many thanks have been doubled.”
He leaves for the third time.
“...”
“...”
“... I swear to Solaris… Well-”
Aaaannnnddd there’s Artemis.
Again.
“Which way is the train station-”
“LITERALLY ACROSS THE STREET!!”
“Oh… Oooohhhh right… Many thanks for the third-”
“LEAVE!!” screams Red, beating me to the punch.
“Eep!”
With a slamming of the front door, Artemis at last does just that.
For the first time all day long, it’s finally only Red Gala and myself in this basement.
Only Red… and myself…
…
… Sigh…
… Which means it’s confession time.
“Well… thank you for all your help, Red,” is how I begin this little talk of ours, as a new feeling of dread begins to set in. “Couldn’t have done this without you.”
“Eeyup.”
“Hah,” I laugh at her good natured ribbing. “You can say that again.”
“Eeyup.”
“Snrk, you jerk,” I hold my sides, and allow her attempt to ease my worries to work. “You’re the best.”
Briefly we hoof/fistbump, before returning to the matter at claw.
“Not sure what Artemis is going to do about his whole… thing,” I attempt to breach the subject delicately. “But I doubt he’ll go crying to his brother about any of this.”
“Eeyup.”
“He’ll probably take the memory of getting beaten up by a couple of girls to his grave.”
“Eeyup.”
“I guess this was about the best outcome either of us could have hoped for…”
“...”
“... Red… Do… D-do you think it was wrong of me to give him so many second chances…?”
“Eeyup.”
I can feel my ear-fins wilting on the side of my head.
“Oh,” I mumble, accepting the criticism. “Yeah… That was real stupid of me, huh…”
“Nnope.”
Turning to meet Red’s eyes, I raise an eyebrow; expressing my fresh confusion.
Red laughs in response.
“May not have been the right move,” she elaborates. “But extendin’ a hoof-, er, claw, to somepony who clearly needs it ain’t stupid.”
“Y-you think so?”
“Ah know so, Barb.”
“... Heh… Thanks, Red.”
“Eeyup.”
“...”
“...”
… Clenching my fists, and tightening my resolve, I brace myself for the final confrontation of the day. “Red,” I begin again, as I turn my head away. “About what Artemis and I were discussing…”
“... Eeyup?”
“You… y-you probably have, like, a bajillion questions for me now!”
“Nnope.”
“You’re entitled to the full truth, Red Gala," I at last manage to spit out. "You see, it... i-it all started back in Canterlot when Dusk first hatc-”
Wait wait wait wait wait wait... wait.
Pump the breaks.
Throw it into reverse…
...
… W-what did she just say?
“N-...Nope?” I repeat, turning back to face Red… only to find her cleaning the mess Artemis’ explosion had caused.
She wasn’t even paying attention to me anymore.
“Hm,” she grunts in a passive reply, her mouth too preoccupied with debris to elaborate further.
Standing dazed, I wait for her to put down her work and take me seriously. When she doesn’t, I begin absentmindedly putting things back together as well. “Nope?” I ask again in between placing beakers back where they belong.
“Nnope,” the earth pony speaks around one of my sending seals.
Gently taking the offered object out of her teeth, I place it into my damaged purse and continue to stare.
“...”
“...”
“...”
“...”
“... Y-you don’t have to be nice to me on this.”
Red puts the book she was carrying down, and turns back my way.
“It’s okay to be curious,” I force myself to say. “It’s okay to want to know the truth. Red… Artemis wasn’t lying… I am a Seer…”
“... Eeyup.”
“...”
“...”
“... Go on… Say something!” I beg, feeling my very heart split in two. “I’m not normal! I’m different! It’s okay to be weirded out! It’s okay to be furious! It’s… i-it’s okay to not to want to be around me anymore... I know so much about what’s to come, and what already came to pass... It’s... it’s okay to be afraid of me-”
“Nnope.”
“Stop trying to be nice!” I snap, disgusted by her insincerity. “It’s okay to think of me as a freak-”
“No it ain’t,” Red snaps back louder, startling me. “Yer makin’ a mountain out of a molehill, Barb.”
“B-but-”
Fump
I once again find her hoof on my shoulder.
“Barbara,” is how Red starts, making damn sure that I’m looking her in the eyes this time. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but ah never saw ya as a normal foal.”
“... Not really sure what other way I’m supposed to take a comment like that, Red.”
“Yer supposed to take it in the way that reminds ya that yer a gosh darn dragon, sugarcube,” Red deadpans, causing me to blush over the misunderstanding. “Ah knew you were different from day one, and nothin’ ah heard here has changed mah opinion of that whatsoever.”
“But-”
“Bein’ Solaris’ little smarty of a Squire, or bein’ a future knowin' Seer whatchamacallit; neither one really means a hill of beans to me."
"But-"
"Yer still mah friend, Barb."
"But-"
"That’s the honest truth.”
“But-”
“You really need to stop being so stupidly hard on yerself over silly little things like this thoug-”
“It’s not silly!” I fight back, pushing away from the embrace. “What I know, what I’ve done, what I didn’t do… Anypony in their right mind should fear me! Y-you can’t just go around and say ‘everything’s gonna be okay’ when it clearly won’t! How… h-how can you stand to be around me?!
“... How can anypony stand to be around such a messed up know-it-all like me…”
"...”
"...”
"..."
"..."
“... How does He’s Dedicated to Roses 2 end?”
Lifting my head, I blink blankly at Red.
“... What?”
“How does He’s Dedicated to Roses 2 end?” Red repeats herself, like everything I said hadn’t happened.
Um… what?
“Did… Did you finish reading it already?” I ask back, uncertain why she changed the subject.
“Nnope.”
“But… it’s been out for weeks… You still haven’t gotten around to reading it yet?”
“Ah’m halfway through, just haven’t had the time to finish.”
"... Do you plan on finishing it?"
"Eeyup."
“... And you still want me to spoil the ending...?”
“Eeyup.”
“...”
“...”
“... W-why would I do that?!” I gasp, miffed by the very request. “It would totally ruin the whole book for you!”
“Eeyup.”
“There’d be no more surprises, or suspense!”
“Eeyup.”
“It would leave you empty, a-and unsatisfied!”
“Eeyup.”
“No!” I stomp a foot, drawing the line. “I won’t spoil it!”
Fump
Once more I find Red’s hoof placed firmly atop my head.
“Good,” she nods simply, and smiles softly. “If ya ain’t willin’ to spill a tiny little thing like that, then ah guess ah don’t have to worry about ya spoilin’ Apple Buck’s cutie mark neither, or who mah special somepony will be.”
"…"
… That…
… leaves me speechless.
With another pat on the head, Red Gala turns away and resumes cleaning. “Yer a good kid, Barb; ain’t got nothin’ to worry about from ya… Now come on,” she orders from over her shoulder, gesturing to the junk piles still around us. “Boys could be back any minute.”
Rooted in place, unable to move, I watch as Red continues to clean the basement.
“...”
“...”
… When it became clear that she truly had nothing else to say on this matter, I too start picking things back up…
…
… I…
…
… I won.
I actually won.
I survived Artemis’ surprise attack, and faced him head on in a counter offensive. I powered through his cruel barbs, and came out on top. I interrogated him thoroughly, and showed him the error of his ways. I punished him properly too, and convinced him never to try something like this again. I even kept Red as an ally, didn’t lose too many of my secrets, held on to the biggest one of them all and, as soon as I put the library back together, I will have gotten away with it completely and utterly with both the boys and Solaris being none the wiser.
I... did it.
I actually won.
I… actually won.
I... won…
…
… But… b-but if that’s true…
Sniff
T-then where are these tears coming from?
I… I-I won! I shouldn’t be sad! I-I, sniff, shouldn’t be crying!
It’s not like this was the closest I’ve come to losing it all or something!
It’s not like I was terrified the whole gosh darn time, a-and hiding it all behind a mask of confidence!
I-it’s not…
Sniff
… It’s not like I’m a little lost girl in a big scary world...
…
…
“... R… R-red?” I sniffle weakly, as all my suppressed fear and worries come crashing down at once. “Thank you, sniff, for being my friend-”
Glomp
Before I could even finish my stuttering, Red Gala was already tenderly hugging my shaking form and gently rocking it back and forth.
The next half hour or so consisted of me weeping loudly into her chest, and nothing more.
_______________________________
“...”
“...”
“... Sniff… I… I think I’m good now.”
“Eeyup?”
“Y-... Yup.”
Red Gala at last lets go, and allows my feet to once more touch the ground. A pleasantly awkward silence then followed between the two of us as we resumed the cleaning.
Sometime later, we both found ourselves in a much more organized laboratory...
… Hopefully Dusk won’t notice all the broken beakers, or the slightly used rope and chains.
“I think this is the best we’re going to get with this room,” I state our mutual thought aloud.
“Eeyup.”
“At least Dusk rarely comes down here... I can probably pass off any damage he finds as the work of Butter’s animals.”
“Eeyup.”
“Let’s see the state of the upstairs now,” I suggest to my best friend. “I might be able to clean that up on my own, though it’ll depend on how big of a mess Angelica left for me to take care of.”
“Eeyup?”
“Yeah, you don’t have to stick around here for that part,” I answer for Red as I walk away, heading towards where I had left my purse. “If the pegasi start clearing the clouds, that means the boys finished their quest and are heading back to Ponyville. You weren’t in my vision for how this day ends, so you should probably skedaddle back home before Applejack beats you to the punch.”
“... Hm,” Red shakes her head lightly, and grins cheekily. “Eeyup?”
Using my O&O voice, I answer back just as cheekily with, “Do not question the Seer, noble knight. They know things you do not.”
“Nnope.”
“Hah! Got me there,” I chortle back. “Clearly I don’t know everything, and I never will.”
“Eeyup.”
“For instance, I don’t know if we’re still on for O&O night next week…?” I ask hopefully.
“Eeyup,” Red confirms in good spirits, before feeling the need to tack on, “Though ah might consider cancelin’ on any poker nights you offer from here on out.”
“... Fair enough, Red. Fair enough.”
“...”
“... Snrk”
Soon we’re both ensnared with a bout of the giggles.
“Okay, enough horsing around,” I joke, returning to business. Quickly tying the loose ends of my purse straps together into a knot, I slip the bundle back over my shoulder. “We’re running out of time before…”
“... Eeyup?” Red turns to ask me, uncertain why I had stopped talking.
Blinking, I move my bag around a bit more in place. Something feels…
… off.
Opening up the flap, I take a quick inventory check.
Let’s see… scrolls? Check. Sealed inkwell? Check. Quill? Check. Backup quill? Check. Scroll seals? Double check; I even have that extra one from Solaris. Tissues? Check. Hoof/claw sanitizer? Check. Gems? Check. Non-gem based snacks? Check. Breath freshening mints? Check. Emergency water bottle for fire-related accidents? Check. Bit purse? Check. Bits in bit purse? Check. Dusk’s spare checklists? Check. Photo of the mane six? Check. Various pictures of Elusive? Check. Day calendar featuring griffon super models? C-check. Solaris’ letter from this morning? Check. Power Pony doll I’m holding on to for Sweepy Belle? Check. Bandages for Scooteroll? Check. Lavender lipstick Rainbow Dash secretly snuck me? Check. Ticket to the Grand Galloping Gala? Check. Roundtrip train ticket to Canterlot for this weekend? Check. Diary? Check…
… Wait, not check… It looks… different.
Reaching into my satchel, I pull out the book.
It’s a lot more… blue then I remember… and a heck of a lot lighter.
Cracking it open, I take a look inside.
◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠
~Journal Entry 0021~
Today we learned that there exists a dessert that was made in honor of our celestial body. It is known as a moonpie.
We fail to see the appeal.
◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠
I flip to another page.
◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠
~Journal Entry 0032~
Apparently there is a holiday dedicated to our fall from grace.
We must remember to ask you-know-who about it posthaste… as soon as he’ll grant us an audience, that is.
◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠
With claws shaking, I turn to the first entry.
◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠
~Journal Entry 0001~
Brother has gifted this journal to us under the pretense that it may aid in our healing… But we know this to be a lie.
Sol’s true objective in doing so was obviously to distract us from what we learned today concerning his Squire, Barbara The Dragoness.
◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠◠
I slam the book shut.
Scanning the basement, I find no more tomes laying about.
The room starts spinning as I start hyperventilating... No.
No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no-
“Barb?” Red asks me straightly, shocked by my shaking.
“T-this is Artemis’!” I manage to squeak out, as my mind flashes memories of the pile of junk the stallion had long since left with. “He must have had it in his dimensional pocket thingy!”
“Eeyup?”
“That… t-that must means…” I gulp loudly, as the weight of my words flips the world upside down. “That must mean that Artemis has my diary!”
Artemis has The Poisoned Barb!!