Chapter 1
The Rainbow Menace
The luxury cruise ship Luxe Deluxe had left the port of Baltimare on schedule at noon. Within only an hour, the massive yacht had traveled far enough out to sea that the land behind it could no longer be seen. The week-long cruise across the open ocean was now underway.
The Equestria Girls had already changed into a completely different set of outfits they felt would be more appropriate for the climate of a voyage across a tropical ocean, with many of them even deciding to wear their magical geodes in an alternate way from the standard necklace. Sunset Shimmer had magenta on her torso and the skirt around her upper legs, black on her feet, her red and yellow sun symbol on the front of her torso, wore her hair down a little straighter than usual, and wore her magical geode on a belt around her waist. Rainbow Dash had medium blue on her legs, horizontal stripes on her torso in a rainbow pattern with red at the top and blue at the bottom along an exposed midriff, a magenta cap on her head with the front displaying a rainbow and cloud on a white background, had her hair tied in a ponytail to stick out the back of her cap, and wore her magical geode on a band around her left wrist. Applejack had red on her torso and the skirt around her upper legs with a green border, green on her feet, was without her recognizable western hat, and wore her magical geode on a headband partially obscured by her hair. Rarity had pale blue on her torso and the skirt around her upper legs with a pattern of purple diamonds, purple on her feet, a yellow belt around her waist, yellow rimmed sunglasses over her eyes with blue tinted lenses, her hair was tied back in a ponytail, and wore her magical geode as a necklace around her neck. Fluttershy had white on her torso with a pattern of pink butterflies and green leaves while her right shoulder was exposed, light blue on her upper legs, pink on her feet, and wore her magical geode as a hair clip. Pinkie Pie had pink on her torso and the skirt around her upper legs with slightly darker pink spots, blue on her feet, a cupcake-shaped fanny-pack that was attached by her hip joint, heart-shaped sunglasses over her eyes with pink rims and pink tinted lenses, her hair was tied back in two pigtails, and wore her magical geode as part of her hairband. Twilight Sparkle had magenta on the front and back with indigo on the sides of her torso and the skirt around her upper legs with stars of the opposing colors all over, purple on her feet, and wore her magical geode as part of her star-shaped hair clip. And finally, Spike had blue on his upper legs, white on his torso and upper arms, a silhouette of a tropical island on the front of his torso, and standard black sunglasses over his eyes, along with his usual red cap on his head.
With the first day of the cruise now underway, the girls had gathered together on the lounge deck, overlooking the swimming pool one deck lower towards the ship’s stern. While Twilight and Sunset stood next to each other as they read over a pamphlet in Twilight’s hands, Pinkie was grabbing smoothies from one of the nearby stands to share with her friends, Rarity took a few selfies, Spike was relaxing in one of the nearby deck chairs, Rainbow Dash wandered around the deck while glancing around in various directions, and Applejack was leaning forward against the railing due to feeling awfully queasy, with Fluttershy doing her best to comfort her seasick friend.
“I think this is arguably going to be one of the best vacation trips we’ve ever had,” Twilight spoke up. “I made sure to put us on a cruise that could offer something for each of us to enjoy.”
“As long as they’ve got a hot tub available, I’m all set,” stated Spike as he remained lying on his back on the deck chair with his arms resting behind his head.
Twilight giggled and responded, “Oh, they’ve got much more to offer than just a hot tub. Allow me to start off from the beginning of this pamphlet.” As Rarity and Rainbow turned their attention to Twilight and gathered nearby, Twilight read off the pamphlet’s first page. “Welcome aboard the Luxe Deluxe, where you’ll set sail for a full week of luxurious luxuriating on our most deluxe luxury liner!”
“Ooh, sounds… luxurious,” remarked Fluttershy with a smile as she turned her attention to Twilight.
Twilight smirked and noted, “Puns and alliteration aside, this cruise definitely has a lot to offer. For example, I think you’ll be most interested in the onboard petting zoo.” She pointed to said feature on the pamphlet as she held it out towards Fluttershy.
“I think that’s wonderful!” agreed Fluttershy. “I’ve always wondered what various adorable animals feel about riding on a boat over the ocean. It’s not exactly something they do in the wild very often, after all.”
Twilight next turned to Rarity and continued, “For you, Rarity, with how much you always love to go on a shopping spree, I’m sure you’ll be excited by the wide selection available at the onboard gift shop. Not to mention, much of the inventory for the duration of this cruise happens to be available at a remarkable discount.”
“You know me so well, Twilight,” remarked Rarity contently. “I am no mere shopaholic, but rather a savvy shopper who is always on the lookout for high-quality items when they become available at reasonably reduced prices. It is why, for example, I always purchase supplies for my boutique’s winter inventory during the summer months, and vice versa.”
“Fruit smoothies for everyone!” declared Pinkie Pie cheerfully as she rejoined the group with an armful of smoothie drinks and started passing them around to everyone. Applejack held up her hand to decline, to which Pinkie simply shrugged and started slurping on both of her remaining smoothies at the same time.
“And I know what you would like, Pinkie,” added Twilight with a smile as she accepted her smoothie. She turned the pamphlet to Pinkie and pointed at another particular portion of it. “An all-you-can-eat dessert buffet, where you can… eat all you… can eat at?” She grinned in embarrassment from failing to come up with some appropriate non-repeating words.
Pinkie didn’t seem to care at all, as she squealed excitedly and exclaimed, “This cruise has everything! It even comes with a moving floor!”
As the gently rolling ocean waves caused the ship to ever so slightly rock back and forth, Applejack momentarily grew queasier, then barely managed to gulp down the contents of her upset stomach and miserably muttered, “After all the other times we’ve been at sea, the one time Ah actually forgot to pack mah seasickness medication, an’ it’s for a cruise we had been plannin’ for weeks…”
“I’m so sorry, Applejack,” said Twilight sympathetically. “I swear, if I had known about your, uh, condition, I would’ve thought ahead and brought a spare supply, just in case something like this happened.”
“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Twilight,” assured Sunset. “You can’t expect everything to go perfectly according to plan. Even so, what you’ve done for us here is incredible. Thank you so much for organizing this trip.”
“Yeah, I’ve gotta hand it to ya,” agreed Rainbow Dash. “You really have an eye for climatic battle settings!”
Everyone else in the group turned to Rainbow Dash and stared at her with looks of confusion.
“Imagine going head to head with a sea monster by the pool!” continued Rainbow Dash excitedly as she began swiftly moving around as if to imitate some kind of action sequence. “Ka-chow! Evil Equestrian Magic flows up the diving pool! BOOM! The Boat’s sinking! Everyone’s screaming!” She then finished off her wild gestures with a heroic pose. “And then we save the day!”
The rest of the girls stared at Rainbow in stunned disbelief. After a moment of silence, Fluttershy spoke up, “Um… is the sea monster okay in this story?”
“Better than okay!” answered Rainbow before quickly slurping the remainder of her smoothie. “She becomes our newest friend!”
Rainbow then casually tossed the empty glass behind her back, which then bounced off a crewwoman’s head and landed upright on the empty serving tray she was carrying. Although the incident didn’t result in any damage or mess, the crewwoman briefly glared at Rainbow before moving along.
Completely oblivious to the minor incident that had just occurred behind her, Rainbow raised her fists and proudly declared, “Best ocean cruise ever!” She looked to her friends, expecting them to be just as thrilled by the idea as she was.
However, everyone else continued to just stare at Rainbow with various looks of concern and disbelief. When Sunset noticed the slightly worried look on Twilight’s face, she turned back to Rainbow Dash and smiled as she calmly remarked, “Or, we could do… not that.”
That comment quickly received words of approval from everyone else in the group except for Rainbow Dash, whose expression and enthusiasm quickly dropped as a result of that reaction.
Twilight stepped forward towards Rainbow and calmly explained, “I was hoping we could do something… without having to battle Equestrian Magic for a change?”
“Ah hear ya,” agreed Applejack, now relaxed enough from her seasickness that she was resting only one hand against the railing. “We couldn’t even spend the day at Equestria Land without causin’ a calamity.”
“Which we then uncalaminated, like literal awesome superheroes!” argued Rainbow with renewed enthusiasm.
Spike scoffed and grumbled, “Even superheroes deserve a little vacation every now and then. And I don’t know about you, but I’ve yet to hear anyone refer to us as, quote-unquote, superheroes.”
Rainbow Dash’s enthusiasm was again quickly deflated by the immense lack of encouragement from her friends.
Rarity stepped forward and placed a hand on Twilight’s shoulder as she sighed contently and assured her friend, “Twilight, this is a most deserved respite. We’re all very thankful for the chance to relax and do absolutely nothing.”
Again, the rest of the group said various words of agreement to simply enjoy the relaxing cruise. While Twilight smiled at them, Rainbow Dash crossed her arms and scowled as she turned away from them.
Rarity suddenly felt her phone vibrate and heard it buzz, so she quickly pulled it out. When she read the alert she had just received, she immediately gasped and started hyperventilating.
Rainbow Dash instantly perked back up at the sound of panic from one of her friends. “What is it?” she asked desperately. “Evil magic?!”
“A GPS alert!” replied Rarity urgently. “We’ve just crossed into neutral waters, beyond the boundaries of any designated region!”
Rainbow Dash gasped in shock, but once it eventually occurred to her that she lacked any context to understand the severity of that information, she awkwardly asked, “Uh, what does that mean?”
Rarity simply smiled and excitedly replied, “Tax-free shopping! My window of opportunity at the gift shop has just opened! Now, if you’ll excuse me…” She felt no need to say any more as she walked away.
“I dunno about you girls,” said Spike as he got up out of the deck chair he was on and began walking away, “but I’m gonna go change into my swim trunks and check out that hot tub.”
“Dessert buffet, here I come!” declared Pinkie Pie cheerfully as she rushed off.
“You go ahead an’ enjoy that petting zoo, Fluttershy,” said Applejack with a weak smile as she began to slowly walk away. “Ah’ll be fine on mah own for a while, an’ you deserve a chance to get your own enjoyment outta this cruise.”
“If you’re really sure about that, then thank you,” replied Fluttershy with a smile and a nod before she also walked away.
“So what do you have in mind?” asked Twilight as she and Sunset both began to walk away together.
Sunset replied, “Well, this is gonna sound crazy, but…”
Rainbow Dash didn’t bother listening to the rest of that conversation. Noticing that she had quite literally been left completely on her own, she crossed her arms and huffed in frustration. “Why don’t they understand?” she grumbled to herself. “Everywhere we go, we always end up faced with evil Equestrian Magic, and we always stop them to save the day. What could be more awesome than that?” She then growled and began marching off across the deck. “Whatever… They’re fools to think we can let down our guard just because we’re in the middle of the ocean, but I’m not falling for it. I know there’s evil magic somewhere on this ship, and I’ll put a stop to it before it can cause any big trouble…”
After asking for directions from one of the ship’s staff, Pinkie Pie quickly made her way directly to the buffet room. Once she reached the double doors to that room, she threw them open and was ecstatic by what she saw. Every table in the room had a wide assortment of various foods available, from the standard bread and salads, to sides of fruit and cheese, and all the steaming hot entrées kept within covered pots to keep them warm and fresh. But what really drew Pinkie’s attention was the dessert table, which had over a dozen trays covered with cookies, candied apples, cupcakes, big cakes, and even a chocolate fountain.
With her eyes focused straight at that dessert table, Pinkie excitedly noted, “Ooh, honey walnut crisp… candy-coated cupcakes… banana sorbet delight…” She suddenly gasped as she zeroed in on one particular tray that was currently under a cover. “A Triple Choco-Berry Blasted Butter Biscuit Bundt Cake?!” She squealed in absolute delight. “I’ve waited my whole life to taste a cake like this!”
With immense anticipation, Pinkie removed the cover, and… was suddenly devastated to discover the tray was completely empty. “NOOOOO!” she cried out in horror.
“Excusez moi, mademoiselle,” spoke up someone with a French accent.
Pinkie Pie spun around and saw that voice came from a minifig with pink skin and short red hair, wearing a chef’s outfit and holding a covered food tray in one hand.
“If you would like to try zis masterpiece of moi, Puffed Pastry,” continued the chef with a smile, “zen how about one fresh from ze oven?” She then removed the cover from the tray in her hand, revealing a freshly-baked bundt cake.
Pinkie immediately gasped in absolute delight as her eyes widened at the sight of that cake and her mouth began to water. She reached out and attempted to grab the whole thing, but Puffed Pastry quickly pulled it back.
Puffed Pastry laughed and said, “Patience. Allow me…” She set down the tray cover and pulled out a spatula. She brought the spatula forward and prepared to start cutting a slice from the cake…
But then, the rainbow motion blur that was Rainbow Dash suddenly rammed directly into Puffed Pastry, tackling the chef to the floor and causing her to fling the cake up into the air.
“CAKE OVERBOARD!!” hollered Pinkie in horror as she helplessly watched that cake arc high across the room and meet a splattering demise upon the head of a boy with glasses.
The boy was momentarily stunned by the impact that left his head and face covered in the splattered remains of that bundt cake. He then reached up and grabbed the chunk of cake that covered his face and took a bite out it. “Mmm, chocolate,” he remarked. “Can’t go wrong with that.”
Puffed Pastry shoved Rainbow Dash off her, then once she saw the confectionary devastation, she gasped and exclaimed, “Mon gâteau!” She then began to growl as her face stared turning red with rage.
Pinkie turned to Rainbow Dash and put her hands on her hips as she frowned and scolded, “Rainbow, what was that for?!”
Before Rainbow got a chance to come up with an answer, Puffed Pastry suddenly grabbed her and Pinkie Pie, dragged them towards the open doorway out into the hallway, and tossed them out of the room. With a furious look on her face, she dusted off her hands as she firmly declared, “Consider yourselves banned!” She then grabbed the double doors and slammed them shut.
With both girls now sitting on the floor in front of the shut doors to the buffet, Pinkie turned to Rainbow with a furious look on her own face as she crossed her arms.
Rainbow Dash chuckled nervously and responded, “You saw it. She had a, uh… spatula! Yeah! An evil spatula, for, uh… hacking people to turn them into baked goods! That means I just saved your life, didn’t I? So, uh… you’re welcome!” She quickly stood up and rushed off.
Pinkie continued to glare in the direction Rainbow ran off to. At this moment, she was very tempted to do to her friend what she stupidly claimed that chef was going to do to her, but she knew better than to actually try such a threat because she wasn’t a psychopath like that. At the very least, she was going to make sure her rainbow-haired roommate would not be getting a good night’s sleep tonight.
Fluttershy was quite pleasantly surprised when she saw for herself that there really was a petting zoo aboard this ship. True, it was a rather small indoor room that could easily fit within the pet shop she owned in Canterlot City, but it was the novelty of having it aboard a ship that was sailing across a vast ocean that really piqued her interest. Within this room was a fenced-in area to the left holding baby sheep and baby goats, a fenced-in area to the right holding rabbits and chickens, and a large glass box in the middle holding various birds. There were also a few kids present who were very happy to be close to such adorable critters.
“A goat on a boat?” quipped Fluttershy was a giggle as she gently picked up one of the baby goats. “Now I’ve seen everything.” She petted that baby goat for a moment, then gently set it back down and walked over to the bunnies. When one of those bunnies called out happily to her, she knelt down and petted that bunny as she cooed, “Aw, aren’t you just the softest thing?”
The bunny responded with some more cheerful squeaks.
“You have forty-two grandchildren?” responded Fluttershy with a smile. “Wow, Mister Bouncy, that is impressive! I’d love to meet them.”
Bouncy the bunny turned to the nearby coop and waved at it. At least a dozen smaller bunnies peeked their heads out through the coop’s opening.
However, before those baby bunnies had a chance to venture outside, Rainbow Dash suddenly rushed into the room. “Not today!” she declared before she shoved Fluttershy away from the bunnies and stood firmly between them.
“Um, Rainbow Dash?” asked Fluttershy in confusion.
“Sure, he seems cute and cuddly, now,” argued Rainbow Dash, “but have you seen what a magic-infused evil rabbit can do?”
That glaring accusation quickly caught the attention of everyone and every critter inside the petting zoo.
Completely baffled by her friend’s accusation, Fluttershy suggested with uncertainty, “Um… eat carrots?”
Though she wouldn’t admit it, Rainbow Dash was completely improvising her reasoning to strike down what she perceived to be evil magic anywhere it might be, so with Fluttershy’s half-hearted suggestion, she pointed at the bunnies and firmly stated, “Yeah, evil carrots!”
That vicious accusation immediately startled all the animals in the petting zoo, causing them all to suddenly flee and huddle inside their shelters. With the whole room now seemingly void of any critters, all the kids turned to Rainbow with sad looks on their faces.
Rainbow Dash didn’t even seem to care as she proudly claimed, “Aha! See? They were evil! And now that I called them out, they’ve all run away back to their evil lairs! My work here is done.” She then zoomed off as a rainbow motion blur.
Fluttershy glanced around the room and saw nothing but some sad kids, some of whom were already starting to sob. She let out a tired sigh and rubbed her forehead as she bitterly thought, If I was capable of hating people, I’d probably be doing that against Rainbow Dash right now…
Spike hummed contently as he made his way towards the spa room, wearing his green swim trunks and carrying a bright green towel over his shoulder. Once he opened the door into the room, he glanced around and saw all the traditional fixtures of a spa such as massage tables, lounge chairs where patrons in mud masks were relaxing, and of course there was the hot tub in the far corner. He smiled when he saw that the hot tub was currently unoccupied.
Spike turned to the lady behind the reception desk and asked, “How long is that hot tub gonna be available?”
The receptionist glanced over one of the sheets of paper on a clipboard and replied, “The earliest reservation we have doesn’t begin until three hours from now.”
“Then I’d like to reserve it from now until then,” requested Spike with a sly grin, “exclusively for me.”
The receptionist scribbled on that sheet of paper, then turned it over to Spike and said, “Just sign here and you’re all set.”
Spike grabbed the clipboard, signed his name on the designated line, and handed it back over to the receptionist.
“Thank you,” said the receptionist as she set the papers back on her desk. “Relax and enjoy your stay.”
“Gladly,” responded Spike with a smile as he made his way over to the hot tub. He set his towel down on the nearby lounge chair and checked the tub’s settings. Since it was not currently in use, it didn’t surprise him that everything was switched off, so he did not hesitate to crank up the temperature to the max. For reasons he could never quite explain, he always seemed to prefer taking baths and showers with very hot water, which of course often resulted in complaints from Twilight over the years, either from using up all the hot water to leave her with a cold shower or not turning back the settings and causing her to suffer scalding hot water at the start of her shower.
Once the underwater jets started pumping hot water into the tub, Spike dipped his foot into the water and confirmed that it was still a little cold after having been idle for quite a while. He remained standing at the edge of the tub and idly glanced around the room while he waited for the water to warm up. The only people he could see in the spa room were either staff or patrons, and none of them seemed to mind his presence at all. As far as he could tell, he would be able to relax in peace and quiet for quite a while.
After about a minute, Spike dipped his foot into the water again. It was only lukewarm, but he knew it was only going to get hotter, so he decided now was a good enough time to get settled in. He knelt down, held his hands onto the edge of the hot tub, and slowly eased himself into the water. He let out a sigh of relief as he submerged himself up to his neck. He could already feel the surrounding bubbling water was warming up even further, and he knew right away that this was exactly the kind of relaxation he needed to start off this week-long cruise.
However, just seconds after climbing into the hot tub, Spike was suddenly yanked out of it. He quickly stumbled to his feet and when he saw that it was Rainbow Dash who had come out of nowhere and done that, he frowned and complained, “Hey! What’s the big idea?”
“Evil magic could be hiding anywhere,” argued Rainbow Dash. “It could even be inside that hot tub, lying in wait to snatch away any unsuspecting victims!”
While all the staff and patrons stopped what they were doing and stared at Rainbow, Spike crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow as he doubtfully asked, “Oh yeah? What kind of things could an evil hot tub possibly do to me?”
“It could turn the water to lava and burn you alive!” Rainbow Dash wildly claimed. “Or it could take possession of you and turn you into a zombie slave! It might even be hiding a swirling vortex at the bottom that would suck you down and send you hurtling back in time!”
Spike stared hard at Rainbow Dash as he skeptically responded, “A hot tub time machine… Riiiiiight…” He then began to walk past Rainbow back towards the hot tub. “I just got this thing reserved for the next three hours, so I’ll take my chances.”
Before Spike could even dip his foot back into the water, Rainbow swiftly shoved him away from the hot tub, then knelt down and reached her arm into the water. She blindly searched the bottom of the tub and her expression brightened when her hand managed to grasp onto something. “Aha! There is something weird at the bottom of this tub!” she proudly declared. “Now let’s see what kind of evil magic it is…” She yanked the mystery object out of the water, revealing it to be… a small chain attached to a white 1x1 round plate. And when that object was removed, the water level in the hot tub quickly dropped until it revealed an open drain in the middle of the bottom.
As the last of the water gurgled down the drain, Spike sat up from where he had fallen on the floor and flatly stated, “That would be the plug for the hot tub’s drain.”
Rainbow Dash stared at the plug for a moment. Internally, she was quite embarrassed that she just made such a silly mistake, but her immense ego drove her to not show that embarrassment at any cost. She chuckled awkwardly and explained, “Yeah, well… that water felt super hot when I reached my hand in, so I guess it really was turning into lava, just like I said it would, which means I just saved your life!” She then struck a heroic pose as she proudly finished, “No thank-yous are necessary.”
“Good,” grumbled Spike as he grabbed his towel and began to leave the spa, “‘cause I had no plans to give you one, anyway.”
Applejack slowly trudged her way across the deck along one side of the ship. She was still feeling slightly nauseous from her seasickness, but for the last couple hours, she had managed to keep a hold of herself. Her struggle was soon worsened when two guys snacking on some skewered shrimp happened to walk by, the scent of which only added to her nausea and making her face turn green. Just seconds later, further ever-so-subtle rocking of the ship threatened to push her queasiness over the limit as she rushed to the side of the ship and leaned over the edge.
It was at this moment that Rainbow Dash noticed Applejack, so she ran over to her friend and greeted, “What’s up, AJ?”
Despite her awful condition, Applejack was a little too stubborn to allow her friend to see her in such a sorry state, so she turned to Rainbow Dash and tried to act casual by resting only one hand against the railing. Unfortunately, her queasiness had by now gotten so bad that she couldn’t even risk opening her mouth, so she was only able to make muffled noises as she slowly slouched over.
Rainbow Dash was baffled by Applejack’s behavior, so she asked, “You can’t talk?”
Still too sick to risk opening her mouth, Applejack mumbled incoherently as she shook her hands and head, then gestured at her lower torso.
Without a clear answer, Rainbow Dash jumped to conclusions and asked in horror, “Evil magic stole your voice?!”
Still unable to voice her feelings beyond some incoherent muffled noises, Applejack furrowed her brow as she again shook her hands and head in denial.
Rainbow Dash didn’t quite take the hint and quickly jumped into action. “Out, evil spirits! Out!” she shouted desperately as she grabbed Applejack by her shoulders and started roughly shaking her back and forth.
That violent back and forth movement only amplified Applejack’s queasiness, so in a desperate effort to prevent a bad situation from becoming worse, she shoved Rainbow Dash off her and quickly leaned her head over the railing. Miraculously, just when she was sure she was about to lose it, she managed to gulp down the contents of her stomach, then took a few seconds to gasp for breath. As she noticed her friend stand back up from where she had fallen onto the deck, she turned to Rainbow Dash and held up her hand, but just when she opened her mouth to say something, her nausea suddenly came roaring back with a vengeance. She had barely enough time to once again lean her head over the side of the ship before she finally retched loudly.
Rainbow Dash cringed at the awful noise from her unfortunate friend and noticed a small flock of seagulls cawing as they flew down to the water beside the ship, directly beneath them. “Or you’re seasick…” concluded Rainbow before she chuckled in embarrassment as she rubbed the back of her head. However, she wasn’t quite ready to give up her initial search, so she suddenly asked in panic, “Because of evil magic?!”
Now that her nausea had finally abated for the moment and her face was no longer discolored, Applejack turned to glare furiously at Rainbow Dash. She didn’t even bother saying a word as she wiped her arm across her mouth while maintaining that hard stare.
“Uh, or not?” added Rainbow Dash weakly before she again chuckled in embarrassment.
Figuring that her dense friend needed a direct message, Applejack held her furious stare as she grumbled, “Dash… Ah swear… the next time Ah’m about to lose mah lunch… Ah’ll make sure it’s directed at you.” She then turned away and began to slowly walk across the deck along the side of the ship.
Rainbow Dash watched Applejack walk away, then peered over the side of the ship to see the floating mess the seagulls had gathered around, then cringed and muttered, “Gross…”
After a few hours, Rainbow Dash had search almost every part of the ship she could think of, and still she had found no traces of anything that could realistically be considered evil magic from Equestria. She honestly didn’t even care that she had inconvenienced some of her friends in the process, but as far as she was concerned, they were necessary sacrifices in order to ensure she and her friends could find and defeat the real magical threat that she was convinced just had to be somewhere aboard this ship. She eventually found herself back at the swimming pool where her search had begun, where many fellow passengers were relaxing and having a good time.
Finally fed up with her complete lack of success, Rainbow Dash furiously shouted, “Has anyone seen bad magic on board?!”
That shout quickly caught the attention of everyone around the pool, but after they turned to look at Rainbow, most of them simply turned away and went back to whatever they were doing.
One guy sitting in a chair beside a table nearby shrugged and replied, “I dunno why you think it’s such a big deal, but if you’re looking for bad magic, then ya might wanna check out the indoor stage.” He gestured at the nearby door to the deck interior. “Down at the end of the hallway, can’t miss it.”
With that new lead to follow, Rainbow grinned and stated, “Perfect.” She adjusted the cap on her head and marched towards the glass double doors. She pushed one of the doors open and saw at the end of the hallway ahead was a purple door surrounded by an elaborate entryway. She had not yet checked that part of the ship, so she was filled with confidence as she marched down the hallway and reached that door.
Rainbow Dash opened the door and almost immediately encountered some strange purple fog. The room inside was dimly lit, so it took a moment for her eyes to adjust to the darkness. She was quickly able to identify features such as rows of seats on the floor, spotlights on the ceiling, and a large open curtain at the far side of the room, confirming that this was indeed the indoor stage. As the mysterious fog slowly began to settle near the floor, she discovered two elderly guys sitting among the many seats and appeared to be asleep.
Believing the fog must’ve had some kind of sleep-inducing effect on those old guys, Rainbow Dash gasped in shock, then glared over to the stage area on the opposite side of the room, where she could already see the silhouette of someone standing upon that stage.
“Prepare yourself…” declared the shadowy figure, pointing out to the audience.
Rainbow Dash swiftly got into a fighting pose and raised her fists as she firmly stated with a grin, “I’m ready for anything!”
The shadowy figure stepped forward to the front of the stage and a spotlight shone upon them, revealing… Trixie. “…for the Great and Powerful Trixie of the High Seas!” she finished dramatically. She then quickly added, “Two shows daily, tip your waitresses.”
As the last of the fog cleared away, Rainbow Dash slumped and muttered in disappointment, “Okay, wasn’t ready for that…”
Trixie looked out across the room and smiled when she spotted a familiar face. “Why, hello, Rainbow Dash,” she greeted as she smugly put her hands on her hips. “Surprised to see me?”
“Uh, yeah?” responded Rainbow as she made her way down the aisle towards the stage. “Why are you here? I thought your probation forbid you from going anywhere outside of Canterlot City.”
“Normally, that would be true,” Trixie slyly explained, “but Trixie decided to put in a special request to join you and your friends on this voyage, so Sunset Shimmer was able to pull a few strings to grant Trixie this one-off exception.” She then lowered her voice and more shamefully added, “Though it mostly involved dragging Trixie’s parole officer along with me.”
Off to the side of the stage just behind the curtain, police officer Flash Sentry stared firmly at Trixie. Without saying a word, he pointed at his eyes and then at Trixie.
“By the way,” continued Trixie more contently, “do you like Trixie’s new look? It’s all part of a rebranding campaign to show my audiences the stage magician I wish to become, and not the evil sorceress I used to be.” Trixie’s new outfit consisted of medium blue on her torso and arms, dark blue on the skirt around her upper legs and the middle of the front of her torso under an open jacket, purple on her lower legs, yellow epaulets over her shoulders, and a dark blue top hat with purple feathers on her head. “Anyway, if you’re hoping for a glimpse of the ultimate power in the universe, you’ll have to wait ‘til tonight’s show.”
By this point, Rainbow Dash had reached the stage and now stood close to Trixie. “Nah, just looking for bad magic,” said Rainbow dismissively as she glanced around the large room.
Trixie glared at Rainbow while she wasn’t looking at her, then removed her hat and wiped off some dust as she stated, “Sorry to disappoint you, but the bad magic of others always follows the amazing magic of moi.” She put her hat back on and smiled smugly.
Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow and asked, “What do you mean?”
Trixie growled in frustration and irritably explained, “I’m talking about the old grandpas in the audience who see my show and then try to impress their grandkids with a disappearing quarter trick on their way home!”
While Trixie was talking, the two elderly guys — apparently now awake from their nap — were attempting to do that very trick she mentioned. The bald one with glasses tried to demonstrate the trick to the guy with white hair and without glasses, but accidentally flung the coin out of his hand in the middle of the demonstration, which then clattered along the floor somewhere. “Oh, drat!” grumbled the bald guy as he started searching down on the floor. “That was a commemorative coin!”
Back on the stage, Rainbow Dash considered Trixie’s words for a moment. As a realization slowly occurred to her, she spoke up, “Their magic only shows up in response to your magic! Trixie, you’re a genius!”
Trixie was momentarily baffled by what Rainbow was talking about and ended up stuttering as she attempted to respond, but quickly regained her composure and smugly replied, “Well, obviously! Thank you for noticing.” She then picked up a prop lying on the stage floor and requested, “Now then, could you be a good friend and help me shove this ten-foot chain of handkerchiefs up my sleeve?”
Rainbow Dash completely ignored the request as she was already off the stage and quickly ran out the door.
As she watch Rainbow Dash leave, Trixie scoffed and grumbled, “Element of Loyalty, my foot!” She removed her right hand and struggled to cram the chain of handkerchiefs into the opening in her arm, but she didn’t quite get even half of it in before her grip slipped and the whole thing suddenly sprung back out. She groaned in frustration, then turned to her parole office and held up her handless right arm as she asked, “Could you lend me a hand?”
Flash Sentry remained silent again with his arms folded as he responded simply by shaking his head in disapproval.
Trixie sighed and muttered, “Of course you won’t.” She retrieved her right hand and reattached it to her arm as she quietly added, “Note to self: consider hiring a full-time assistant.”
While Rainbow Dash was busy pestering everyone without even realizing it, Rarity had gone straight to the onboard gift shop. When she arrived, she was absolutely delighted by the wide selection of items available for purchase — especially all the clothing and accessories. She knew almost right away that this was going to be a very good day for her.
“Reserve some space for me, please,” Rarity informed the cashier as she passed by the counter in the center of the room. “I intend to make a lot of purchases today.”
“Oh great, it’s one of those shoppers,” muttered the cashier as she pulled out her phone to find something to occupy her time while she waited for her latest customer to gather everything of interest — which was sure to be a large pile.
Rarity began with a quick glance around at the available inventory, which included shirts, dresses, hats, tote bags, novelty sunglasses, and much more. With a smile on her face, she tried out everything of interest in front of a large mirror on the wall. There was so much that fascinated her that virtually every time she passed by the counter, she always had something picked out that she would drop off to her ever growing pile on the counter. In addition to all the various kinds of clothing and accessories, she also picked up a few souvenirs, such as a starfish-shaped pillow, ocean-themed keychains, and even decorated seashells. After nearly two hours of shopping around, she was finally satisfied that she had gathered everything she wanted, so she returned to the counter and waited for the cashier to total up her purchases.
“That’ll be nine ninety-nine,” stated the board cashier.
Rarity giggled and cheerfully remarked, “My savvy shopping smarts strike again!” She reached into her purse and pulled out a green 1x2 tile with a white number “10” printed on it. “Here’s ten,” she said contently as she handed it over to the cashier.
The cashier took the ten dollar bill, placed it inside the cash register, then took out a brown coin stamped with a number “1” on it and casually tossed it over to Rarity.
Rarity reached out to catch the coin, but it slipped out of her grasp. She flailed her hands around as she attempted to grab it, but ultimately caused it to fling out of her reach and clatter to the floor. She quickly knelt down and reached out to grab the fallen coin, only for someone else’s hand to reach it only an instant before she could.
This guy was a member of the ship’s staff — as indicated by his white uniform with a black star and ocean wave symbol on the upper right part of the shirt — who had light orange skin, short messy blond hair on his head, freckles on his face, and green eyes. With a smile on his face, he picked up the coin from the floor and bit down on it. “By golly! That’s real copper, it is!” he remarked, speaking in a thick Cockney accent. “Bloomin’ delightful!”
Rarity was rendered completely speechless and unmoving as she stared at this particular crewman. Whether it was his charming attitude, his dashing good looks, or even his lovely foreign accent, there was something about this guy that left her feeling quite smitten. And of course, there was little she could do to hide the blush forming on her face.
As he stood back up, the crewman noticed Rarity staring at him with a blush on her face, so he held the coin out to her and asked, “Uh… penny for your thoughts, miss?”
Rarity finally snapped out of her love-struck trance and awkwardly stammered for a moment before she eventually giggled and quipped, “Oh, you can’t afford my thoughts, darling.”
The crewman chuckled and remarked, “Quite right. Lovable scamp like meself.” He held out both hands and helped Rarity back up to her feet while placing the coin into her hands. “Ol’ Ragamuffin, that’s me name, innit?” he formally greeted with a wink. When he noticed the large pile of bagged items on the nearby counter, he offered, “Uh, need a ‘and?”
Rarity turned to her recent purchases, then smiled and replied, “Oh, most certainly, Ragamuffin.” As she began passing the bags into Ragamuffin’s arms, she added, “I’m Rarity.”
While he grabbed the first few bags being passed to him, Ragamuffin carefully said, “Uh, Raar-i-ee?” He awkwardly cleared his throat as he immediately recognized that his thick accent made it difficult for him to pronounce her name the way she had.
“Oh, no-no-no-no-no, Rare-i-tee,” enunciated Rarity as she passed the last of her purchases over to Ragamuffin.
“Rarr-i-ee?” spoke Ragamuffin slowly, again awkwardly struggling to properly pronounce her name through his thick accent.
Rarity sighed and muttered, “Close enough, I suppose.” She wasn’t about to let such a minor flaw ruin the mood, so she kept her smile up as she turned to the door out of the gift shop. “Come along, now.”
Ragamuffin followed after Rarity, but after only a few steps, the pile of full bags in his arms suddenly shifted around, forcing him to stumble a little as he tried to regain his balance. Thankfully, he was quickly able to stabilize the pile of bags, with the only thing to fall over being the starfish pillow with a smiley face on it, which now obscured his face. “No worries!” he assured happily. “I got it!”
Rarity couldn’t help but giggle at the sight of his head seemingly being replaced by that smiling starfish. Even though she had literally just met the guy, she knew she was madly in love with him, and she was completely okay with it.
Sunset had made a plan with Twilight to make use of the outdoor stage on the forward deck for their band to perform for everyone aboard the ship. Twilight had anticipated such an idea, which was why she had asked her friends to pack their instruments back when they were getting ready for this cruise, so all they really needed was permission to use the proper venue for their performance. The two girls discussed the idea with the ship’s staff, and once they got word that the captain had given his approval, they immediately called their friends to retrieve their instruments and gather at the stage to begin preparations for the show they would be putting on later tonight.
While Twilight waited at the stage, Sunset left to retrieve her guitar in their room. By the time she returned, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, Applejack, and Spike had all arrived. Yet, none of those four seemed to express any enthusiasm at all. Pinkie was slumped over with a bored expression as she sat behind her drum set, Fluttershy had virtually no emotion at all as she barely tapped her tambourine at all, Applejack had set aside her bass guitar as her seasickness forced her to sit down beside one of the amps for the moment, and Spike had a grumpy look on his face as he sat behind the backstage soundboard with his head propped on his left hand while his right hand tapped against the soundboard.
Sunset shared a worried glance with Twilight. Just hours ago, everyone had seemed so enthusiastic to be on this cruise, but now at least half of the entire group were behaving as if they were enduring the most miserable day of their lives. This was supposed to be their best vacation yet, but somehow, things were already going terribly wrong.
Whatever the case, Twilight saw it as her obligation to help lighten the mood, so after thinking for a moment, she smiled as she turned to her gathered friends and cheerfully spoke up, “Look at us! Getting ready to play at a pool party! Who knows what hijinks will ensue, am I right? Maybe I’ll fall in the pool fully clothed! And everyone will laugh!” She finished off with some forced laughter.
While Applejack remained too sick to move much, Fluttershy, Pinkie, and Spike all stared at Twilight as she spoke. When Twilight finished, Spike rolled his eyes, Fluttershy sadly glanced away, and Pinkie let her head drop to bang against one of her drums.
Seeing no positive reaction out of any of her friends, Twilight dropped her forced smile and worriedly asked, “Are you not having fun?”
Pinkie let out a sad sigh and sullenly explained, “My whole life, I’ve been taught that you could only berry blast a butter biscuit on a bundt cake with two layers of chocolate. But this afternoon, I saw the truth. The buffet has a Triple Choco-Berry Blasted Butter Biscuit Bundt Cake.”
“How was it?” asked Twilight with a smile, hoping to keep things positive.
“I don’t know!” snapped Pinkie Pie as she suddenly beat her fists against two of her drums. “‘Cause Rainbow Dash tackled the chef for no reason and got me banned from the buffet!”
“What?!” asked Twilight in shock.
“She also scared all the animals in the petting zoo,” Fluttershy sadly added. “Now they don’t want pets… it’s just a zoo…”
“I got a chance to reserve that hot tub all to myself for three hours,” Spike grumpily added, “but I only got to enjoy it for three seconds before she yanked me out and drained it, all because she thought it was somehow hiding some kind of evil magic. I mean, where does she come up with these crazy ideas?!”
Applejack groaned as she forced herself to stand up and muttered, “She sure wasn’t helpin’ me not get sick off the side of the boat.”
Twilight just couldn’t believe that their own friend Rainbow Dash had caused so many problems for so many of them so quickly. Growing increasingly concerned, she asked, “But you’re still having fun, right?”
“Oh, o-of course!” Fluttershy shakily responded.
“Yeaaahhh…” Pinkie flatly responded while raising one of her drumsticks up in the air.
“Super-duper…” grumbled Spike as his head remained propped on his left arm.
Applejack didn’t have a chance to say anything before her nausea acted up again, forcing her to run away.
Twilight folded her arms and glanced down at her feet as she shamefully said, “I’m sorry, everyone.”
Sunset set aside her guitar and placed a hand on Twilight’s shoulder. “It’s not your fault,” she assured her friend.
Twilight responded with a small smile, but before she got a chance to say something, they noticed Rainbow Dash running over to them.
“Hey, gang!” Rainbow called out excitedly as she rushed towards the stage and swiftly climbed up to join her friends. “Sorry I’m late! So, listen, I’ve got an idea for our show tonight! We unleash some awesomeness on the crowd! I’m talkin’ rainbow lasers!”
Rainbow’s enthusiasm was met only with confused silence. It was Sunset who eventually asked, “Is that a thing?”
Rainbow laughed and replied, “Yeah! When we—”
“Do you mean when we turn into pony people,” asked Pinkie in confusion, “or do you mean—?”
“No! The other thing!” insisted Rainbow Dash.
“I always called it ‘pony up’,” noted Sunset as she raised an eyebrow.
Rainbow scoffed in frustration and again excitedly insisted, “The rainbow lasers!”
“I don’t think that’s a thing…” said Fluttershy uneasily as she slowly shook her head in disagreement.
“It will be after we do it tonight!” declared Rainbow with a huge smile on her face. “Who’s with me?!”
No one else in the group immediately responded, and even then, none of them expressed any enthusiasm at all.
“Seriously?” grumbled Spike incredulously. “You’re actually asking us that? After everything you did to us over the last few hours?”
Sensing there were now tensions that had a real possibility of quickly escalating, Sunset decided to step in and try to resolve this situation without anyone getting hurt. “Rainbow Dash, can I talk to you for a second?” she asked as she gestured over to the side of the stage.
Rainbow was confused by the absolute lack of excitement from her friends, but she respected Sunset, so she agreed with a shrug and followed her off to the side of the stage. “It’s about my awesome idea, isn’t it?” she asked with a grin.
“No, Rainbow,” replied Sunset. Once they were a good distance away from the others, the two girls stopped walking and turned to face each other. “Look…” began Sunset uneasily. She pressed her hands together as she took a deep breath and then let it out slowly. Once she was relatively relaxed, she continued, “Twilight worked really hard to plan this trip for all of us, and…” She turned away as she hesitated. “Oh, how can I say this without being mean?”
“Just say it!” argued Rainbow Dash impatiently. “I can take it!”
With that demand, Sunset impulsively decided to forgo any politeness or subtlety, so she firmly responded, “You’re ruining it for everyone!”
“Ouch!” said Rainbow Dash in stunned disbelief. “Your words just… punched my feelings…”
“You said you could take it!” Sunset pointed out in frustration. She took another deep breath to calm herself before she added, “Just… stop looking for a problem when there isn’t one. How’s that?”
“But what if there is a problem that we don’t know about?!” insisted Rainbow Dash. “We’ve gotta be ready for anything!”
“And what if there really isn’t such a problem after all?” Sunset shot back. She sighed and facepalmed. “Look, Rainbow, I get it. I used to worry a lot about these evil magical incidents, too. About when and where the next one might strike. But I learned my lesson back when Starlight Glimmer visited. She helped me realized that I shouldn’t waste my time worrying about any bad things that might happen, because then I would miss out on all the good things that are happening. And right now, this cruise is supposed to be one of those good things.” She turned away and began walking back to the others on the stage. “I would strongly recommend you learn this lesson, yourself, before you make things even worse.”
Rainbow crossed her arms and frowned as she reluctantly grumbled, “Fine…” As she followed Sunset back to the rest of their friends, she added, “But I still wanna do the rainbow lasers, just ‘cause it’s awesome!”
“We’ll see about that…” muttered Sunset.
“Hello, darlings!” greeted Rarity giddily as she walked across the deck towards the stage. Following behind her was Ragamuffin, his face still obscured by the piles of shopping bags in his arms.
“Rarity?” asked Twilight as she and her friends turned to see the last missing member of their group finally arrive. “Where have you been? Please don’t tell me you’ve been browsing the gift shop this whole time.”
Rarity lifted her sunglasses onto her forehead as she giggled sheepishly and replied, “While I confess I certainly took my time at the gift shop, I can assure you I was fashionably late for a perfectly good reason.”
Once the two minifigs arrived at the stage, Ragamuffin set down all those shopping bags and remarked in a chipper tone, “Just ‘avin’ a li’l chat with ol’ Ragamuffin, she was!”
It was right at this moment when Applejack returned after having… relieved herself of her nausea. As she stepped onto the stage, she ended up standing right next to Ragamuffin. This caused everyone else — except for Rarity — to suddenly do a double-take when they noticed how astonishingly similar the two of them were in terms of appearances, right down to the color of their hair, skin, eyes, and even the freckles on their faces.
Believing the awkward silence to indicate that he wasn’t exactly welcome by at least some of the girls, Ragamuffin kept smiling as he said, “All right, all right, I geddit. I got other duties to take care of elsewhere, so I’ll leave ya to it. Thanks for ev’rythin’, Rari-ee.” He gave a friendly salute as he said his parting words to Rarity.
Rarity swooned with a smile and blush on her face.
“I can see you lot are preparin’ a concert of some sort, so good luck with all that music an’ whatnot,” added Ragamuffin as he shook Applejack’s hand.
Unfortunately, Applejack’s seasickness had left her so sensitive that the vigorous handshake caused her queasiness to suddenly act up yet again, forcing her to run off once more.
Ragamuffin was briefly caught off-guard, but maintained his positive attitude as he apologized, “Sorry ‘bout that, mate.” He quickly regained his chipper smile as he waved to Rarity and said, “Cheers!” He then turned and walked away.
Rarity waved back at Ragamuffin as he departed. She let out a love-struck sigh and lovingly remarked, “It’s like he fell out of a historical romance novel…” As she kept staring in the direction her new crush had walked off to, she was blissfully unaware of the perplexed looks on the faces of her friends behind her back.
“Is that how romance sounds?” asked Fluttershy in confusion.
“Who cares?” replied Rainbow Dash dismissively. “We got more important things to worry about, like getting ready for tonight’s awesome show!” She quickly retrieved her guitar and plugged it into one of the large amps nearby.
Spike turned his gaze back towards Rarity and grumbled, “At least someone’s day hasn’t been ruined by a certain rainbow menace…”
Rarity overheard Spike’s complaint, so she turned back to him and asked curiously, “Oh? Has Rainbow Dash been causing issues today?”
“You don’t know the half of it,” Spike bitterly replied.
“C’mon, everyone!” Rainbow Dash excitedly called out to her friends on the stage, seemingly without any concern for their feelings regarding her. “We’re gonna make tonight’s show the best one this ship has ever seen!” She then began shredding a few tunes out on her guitar with enthusiasm.
Spike rolled his eyes as his posture had remained unchanged at the seat behind the soundboard. As his free hand tapped against the soundboard, one particular setting on that board caught his attention. He glanced back at Rainbow Dash, then reached over to that dial and turned it all the way down to zero.
Rainbow Dash immediately stopped playing when she noticed that the amp her guitar was plugged into was suddenly no longer producing any noise at all. “Hey, what gives?” she complained as she strummed her guitar and heard nothing more than the barely-audible unamplified strings. She turned to Spike and asked “Why am I not getting any sound?”
With a bored frown still on his face and his head propped on his left hand, Spike just shrugged and replied, “Beats me.”
Unlike Rainbow Dash, Rarity and Fluttershy were well aware of what really happened, as they had both witnessed Spike mess with the soundboard. They both turned to each other, silently debating whether or not they should speak up.
Rainbow was quickly losing patience as she turned to stand directly in front of the large and currently silent amp. “C’mon!” she complained as she wildly shredded her guitar. “Gimme something awesome!”
Spike let Rainbow suffer a few more seconds of near-silence. Then, as Rainbow raised her hand up high, Spike swiftly turned that dial from zero all the way up to eleven.
When Rainbow Dash brought down her hand for a single hard shred, the resulting audio blast from the amp was so powerful that it literally blew her into the air and threw her clear across the stage. And of course, the suddenness of that extremely loud noise caused everyone else on stage to swiftly cover their ears.
Spike quickly turned the dial back down before the audio feedback could get seriously bad. As he glanced over at where Rainbow Dash had fallen in a heap, he smirked and remarked, “Yeah… that was awesome.”
Sunset and Twilight glanced at Rainbow Dash, then at Spike, then to each other. “Does he do this a lot?” asked Sunset with concern in her voice.
“Usually only in cases where he feels he’s been treated unfairly,” answered Twilight, “such as having something taken away without good reason.”
Sunset looked again at Rainbow Dash — who groaned as she slowly began to push herself off the deck — then turned back to Twilight and stated, “Normally, I wouldn’t approve of behavior like that, but for this case…” She maintained her frown as she retrieved her guitar and slung it over her shoulder. “Sometimes, you gotta let karma do its thing.”