A/N: Aagh! Sorry this took so long, but I got a bad case of the Eh-I-Don't-Feel-Like-It's. Any creative type can tell you how persistent that disease is. But this chapter was also tricky for me, so that made it take longer as well. Feel free to comment on any errors, as usual.
---
I completely froze. I had ruined everything with one word. Can you imagine? Just one word...that was all it took to invert my entire life. No word should be that powerful.
I still don't really believe that I said that. Maybe I just said something that sounded like it. My lips were trembling quite a bit. But it was clear as the fact I'll die one day what he heard. All I could do was just sit there while he backed away from me. His face...I couldn't stand looking at his face after that word. But I had to. I had to see just what I had done to him. Even when he started laughing, I couldn't make myself see anything but that demented grin.
Wait...whut? Demented grin?
“O-O' course!”, he shrieked at me. “This makes MUCH more sense! You jus' cain't stand me gettin' on without you, so you twist mah head 'round 'till Ah give in! Hahaha! Well done, sugarcube!”
That doesn't...
I tried to defend myself, to tell him it was a passion-sick mistake. But my throat wouldn't move. It was like that word was still being spoken, and my voice couldn't articulate anything else while it reverberated though the two of us.
Why're you sayin' it like this? Whut's th' point?
Even with that part of my life behind me, Da--that pony behind the word still failed to be a positive influence. So I just sat there and let him keep talking.
“Yeah, i-it's jus' fine! T-This is 'zactly why you need that head doctor! Ah mean, you heard yerself say that, right?! EEYUP, you sure did! HAHA! Ah can see it on yer face...damn, lover boy, you sure fucked yerself over!”
Oh, that's jus' – you little liar!
But that was when his rant twisted upon itself, and it became absolutely unbearable.
“Love...love, huh?! YOU THINK AH LOVE YOU?! L-Lemme tell you whut th' deal is, boy. Ah'm a dumb farm pony who don' know no better no how! So...so...oh, Celestia, you KNEW. You came back t'town knowin' 'zactly how t'trick me into feelin' weak an' helpless. But you slipped, didn't you? You meant t'crush mah soul a little later, maybe in th' middle o' somethin' intimate?”
Wouldn't've surprised me. At least not now. Ah shouldn't've let you on that path that day. Ah should've known trouble when Ah saw it.
“That's why yer...” I forget the rest. I blocked it out or something.
Or maybe you cain't think o' whut t'fill in?
I finally managed to blurt out: “I-It doesn't have to be this way!” Yes, it was meaningless, but a stock response is better than no response. Or at least I thought so at the time.
Big Macintosh became very quiet then.
“...You know?”, he said with a tone that still gives me chills just thinking about it. “Yer right. It doesn't. Ah don' hafta subject some poor doctor pony with yer nonsense. In fact...Ah know jus' th' pony who could sort this mess out or burn out tryin'!”
...It wuzn't worded like that, but whatever. Liars will lie.
To this hour, I can't say what force compelled me to ask: “Who?”
Big Macintosh burst out laughing.
Not even slightly true.
“WHO ELSE?!”
“...No,” I begged.
This is gettin' ridiculous!
“It's perfect! Ah'll jus' haul you up ta th' mines an' leave th' two o' you to it. Buck two trees with one kick! An' th' apple doesn't fall far from th' tree, so both you basketcases can rot in peace and harmony!”
Ah...AH DON' BELIEVE YOU! HOW DARE YOU...wait. This jus' falls in line with everythin' else. Calm down, calm down.
“You can't do that to me...!”
“Or you could sort it out,” he continued, deliberately ignoring me, “but... HAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAA! Who am Ah kiddin'?! He'd ignore you, an' you'd jus' pretend he wuz some random diamond miner! Oh pony, that cracked me up!”
This is sick. Ah cain't hardly bear anymore!
“S-Sure, it'd be funny,” I lied to try and calm him down. “Just think this through a little more. I'll go to that therapist you described, and we can write this day off as a...a m-mis...”
I could feel my soul ripping itself apart as I hissed the beginning of the word.
Yer really milkin' this now. Hissing words? Are you a snake now?
“A whut now?”, he asked with an insincere frown, turning his ear to me as if I were too quiet to be heard.
“...We would write it off as a mistake.”
If only it were that simple, Caramel. After whut you did, that "mistake" will define you fer the rest o' yer life.
“A MISTAKE, you say?”, continued Macintosh. “Too late fer that, hon. This is more than a mistake! It's an abomination before all o' ponydom, an' it's now mah duty t'make sure it doesn't happen 'gain! Yer comin' with me, Caramel.”
WHUT?! THAT'S TH' MOST BLATANT--INEXCUSABLE--
“NO! DON'T YOU DARE, DON'T TOUCH ME!”, I cried out, trying to back away but still rooted to the ground. Macintosh knew he could only take me with him one way...by swinging his--
"THAT'S ENOUGH!"
---
“...Huh?”, Caramel blustered at me.
“Ah'm astounded, Caramel. It's only been a couple o' days, an' half o' whut you said wuz made up t'trick me. Even as far as you've sunk, Ah thought you'd still have th' decency t'tell me th' truth.”
“AJ, for Celestia's sake!”, he stubbornly continued. “I'm telling you the truth! I have no reason to lie at this point; I have nothing to gain. NOTHING. You made sure of that.”
I looked past him, toward the back of the train car. He was only taking a silver horseshoe and a vase of morning glories with him. I didn't persuade him in his choices in the slightest...though perhaps I should have. I needed some grasp of what was happening; even the smallest lasso-full of control would've soothed my nerves.
“Well, you must've somethin' to hold on ta,” I insisted. “Big Macintosh told me th' real version, an' that should've been enough. He certainly had no reason to lie. But Ah thought before Ah do this...that you MIGHT have somethin' t'say. Ah've heard that somethin', an' Ah'm more sure than ever this is whut needs t'be done.”
He had no response, for once. But I was sure if he did, then it would be a meaningless gurgle about how it was "just a mistake."
“It's only that you were good t'us in th' past that Ah didn't turn you in. Jus'...go somewhere quiet, an' Ah'm sure everypony will find somethin' amicable instead o' all this. Ah'll find you if'n we change our minds. So...this is goodbye.”
I honestly had nothing else to say. All I wanted to do was go back to see my big brother and my friends, maybe try one of Pinkie's stress-relieving cupcakes. But nothing would make that pony look like he used to, not now. I used to always see a charming, determined little colt when he was on the farm, even when things were at their most confusing. Still, this whole ordeal made it clear as day who he really was. It was...it was almost a relief to not have to justify his behavior. I didn't have to justify anything of his anymore.
I could just focus on my family. Yes. My family. I finally turned around and started to run for the hospital.
“Y-You're sure he's alright?”, I heard him call behind me. Of course he found one last crutch to stand on...I stopped one last time.
“As far as we know,” I answered without turning my head. “But it changes nothing, you know that.”
“...Yeah. I panicked. Nothing will change that...”
“...Think of it this way,” I spat at him. “You don' hafta worry 'bout him anymore. You can start fresh. Now git started.”
I didn't stick around to see if he obeyed me or not. The guilt of staying away from the bedside became too much to bear, fogging my head from pointless distractions. That's all that horse was now. A pointless distraction. Maybe that's all he ever was. All that mess with craters and shoeing and Paradise-knows-what-else wasn't and would never be our area. Any Apple would have helped him out in that sad state...and then set him off on his own. That's all this was, wasn't it? I supposed it was! N-Not that it mattered either way.
As pointless distractions go, it faded from my mind as the bright white hospital building came into view. I actually found myself hoping Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash were still telling the story of how they found both of them; I just didn't have the energy to entertain visitors anymore.
---
I had never had my head separated from my body. But that's the only way I could think to describe how I felt for the last week. Only my head felt like good old flesh and bones; the rest felt like an oversoaked sponge with unnecessary limbs. I had requested they leave my noggin alone myself...but the more I floated above the tether of my useless body, the more I almost regretted that prerogative. They might as well have knocked me out cold until my blood flow had gone back to normal.
Due to recent events, it wasn't like I couldn't afford the expense.
That self-pitying stream ran through my head every time I woke up to hear Rainbow telling the story, each time altered to appeal to the new audience of that morning. That is, when I did wake up in the morning. When I woke up today, I heard a snippit of an “anti-drag cloud” or something weird like that. More than a little curious about this addition to my story, I perked my ears up to listen more closely. As soon as I did that, I suddenly heard Junebug's soft breathing as she still slept on the chair beside me.
“O-Oh Rainbow, you don't have to tell them that,” I heard Fluttershy say from outside the door. She said that at some point whenever Rainbow re-invented the story, and she was always right.
“Why the hay not?!”, defied Rainbow as usual. “It's a great story! Those butterflies trained like crazy to do that for you. They helped you win the race! Now don't tell me that's not worthwhile!”
Butterflies...race...Fluttershy...I figured they meant the bizarre cloud that flew over the seed shed in the spring and nearly bowled me into the wall. Having only learned of it weeks after the fact, I wasn't overly concerned with it. Except one facet of it disturbed me to no end: Fluttershy, when asked, would only mention a few strange butterflies she hadn't seen before breaking away from the group. As a matter of fact, she mentioned three butterflies often straying from her shelter during the spring...that always made me think of little Clementine for some reason. It was stupid; what did pretty little butterflies have to do with that power-hungry filly? But I associated the two each time I heard it, without fail.
Maybe it was the times after all; something in the air was just...different. I didn't want to think the news, the social climate, or even the atmosphere itself was making ponies slowly corrupt and sever from each other. But certain ponies made the idea hard to ignore. Either way, something had to be done.
That's cruel, coming from you.
“It was absolutely dazzing to behold as well; an electric pink cloud tearing across the sky!”, said Miss Rarity. At least I think it was her. Ponyville had gotten more fancy ponies over the year, and those voices tended to sound alike. Either that, or some of the anesthetic really did get to my head.
“Anyway, I convinced her to start training again so she could use that technique again, so she could go from place to place faster, so she could take care of her critters all over the place more efficiently, right? Makes sense and all, you know.”
I could almost hear Twilight rolling her eyes. Even I knew that was a run-on sentence. That last bit was probably a sentence fragment, too. The former right next to the latter? I would have giggled if it didn't make the sponge tingle.
“So we were racing over the forest path, to kinda check on things with the Running of the Leaves, too. Everything was going fine, until...until...come on, Fluttershy.”
“...Do I have to?”, complained Fluttershy.
“We have an audience here, and they're hanging on every word! Just do it and get it over with.”
I heard her sigh. It wasn't a timid sigh like the first few times. It was a sigh of defeat, and a well-earned one. I joined her as gently as I could.
“...Until I swooped down 'like a raven' and spotted t-the scene of the crime right as it 'went down'.”
The other ponies outside the door gasped at the same time. This gasp was a little shallower than the others. But maybe that wasn't accidental: Fluttershy forgot to mention that she flew down when she saw those same three butterflies down there. It certainly would have explained it for the crowd, so they would have believed it more easily, maybe? How much of a difference did that sort of thing make, anyway?
...When did you start caring about stuff like that?
...When did I start caring about stuff like that? This hospital was driving me out of my mind.
Heh.
“She was right there, you guys!”, Rainbow said with too much eagerness. “She saw the moment Caramel bucked Big Macintosh square in the chest! She saw the horseshoes crush the flesh and bone, just missing his heart.”
“Ah think that's enough fer today, Rainbow,” I heard my sister scold. Every time she said that, I could breathe a little easier. Granted, that wasn't saying much. The raw force of the blow turned my ribs into half-eaten apple pie crust, or so my sister told me for fear of describing it properly.
The crowd noisily dispersed, more than a few of them dropping words like “Scoundrel” and “Unbalanced” and even “Monster” and other words that nopony in our family would touch. Normally. I had already vowed to put a stop to my foul language from this point onward. It was weird hearing it all because...it bothered me, and yet it didn't. It didn't bother me because ponies will think what they think; nothing will ever change that. It did bother me because they said it without understanding the real story.
Too true to be funny.
Every time I heard the story, only one inaccuracy was consistently retold. It was a small one for the gossiping listeners, being highly informed and all, but it changed everything when actually told. I managed to convince myself there was only one reason why it was hard to breathe...But he hit it. He hit it hard.
But how could he twist my heart so thoroughly?! Was I really that incapable of keeping dreams and reality apart? Why did he even matter to me? It was...so unfocused and muddled that it got mixed up in everything else and just made me tired. When it happened before, I decided I was confusing love with my own fixation on obligation. Having ruled that out...eugh! It was the last thing I needed to think about while still bed-ridden.
If you ask me, there's no better time...
Although it would be the one productive thing to do. No, it made no difference. Not anymore. All I ever really wanted was a family to call my own; and now I was closer than ever at getting one! I just had to keep dreams in my head and reality by my side. And look at the flowers: freshly picked daisies and morning glories. June always got up too early to surprise me with them, poor thing. Sometimes I stayed up too late just so she could relax and rest herself, ready to be a doll at a more reasonable hour. It was so sweet...it was almost cruel, smelling the weak aroma but still too weak to eat them.
Caramel...what in every hell did you do to me?
Just how long is this whole deal going to take? And it just occurred to me: how did you find me, anyway? I'm under so many wraps I can't breathe!
“You holdin' up fine in here, big brother?”, I heard as the door closed behind my little sister.
Of course you were. You pretty much proved you're immortal; a couple weeks' rest really is all you would need!
I licked my dry lips and inhaled gingerly to reply: “Eeyup.”
“That's good,” she said with that adorable little smile. “AJ should be comin' by later; she really didn't like Rainbow's storytellin' th' day before. An' today sounded even worse, so Ah don' even wanna think 'bout how mad she'd get!”
“...Nnope.” I nudged my head toward June so Bloom wouldn't get too loud.
“Oh. Anyway, Ah still think she's getting' better. It took both of us t'git her t'listen ta...you know...B-But she's eatin' 'gain an' doin' chores with me, so it'll all be good!”
Little Bloom...if only her sister and I were as simple as she was, thing would've been much easier. Life was better managed with simple methods. I needed to learn that way of being again, and I had all the time in the world now.
How rosy. Wait...oh, you sneaky devil. But it's not like it even matters now.
I said, “Eeyup,” to her, trying to see if I could claim my vanity as real. But it was going to take a lot of 'Eeyup's. She beamed at me nonetheless, and thank Celestia she always did.
You weren't dying by this point. What's with the melodrama?
“...They still haven't taken that contraption off you?”
“Nnope,” I confirmed, looking to the...I-V, I think they called it?...hooked to my flesh. I had seen something like it when I visited Rainbow in the same hospital, but this one seemed much more complicated. I reckoned it had to do with helping my blood flow and muscles restore themselves. I felt like a submarine sandwich stabbed by several toothpicks, except these toothpicks were keeping me alive. Coincidentally, I decided that acupuncture didn't interest me too much sometime during my hospital stay.
Was that supposed to be funny? I mean, yes, it's heartbreaking...but why try to make light of it? It's not like you to-- Oh, it's because it is you. Dressing it up so I wouldn't worry...figures.
It was around this time that Junebug started to rouse out of the one chair next to the bed.
“Mornin', Miss Junebug!”, said Applebloom. “Didja sleep alright?”
“Mnngh...It was as good as I could have hoped for,” said June sweetly. “At least the sun wasn't streaming in my eyes.”
“Eeyup, that woulda been a mite irritatin',” agreed Bloom.
This is really detailed. If you're trying to make me feel guilty with every aspect of your life, then you're still full of drugs.
I made myself clear my throat, as much as I instantly regretted it. They both turned to look at me and stopped that inane time-wasting. Both of us were going to try to convince June again, and I wasn't in the mood for any preambles or niceties. They had hardly done any good so far – hells, they weren't any good all year – so I decided for us that a good old Apple-style method was in order.
“Where is he, June?”, I said with as much authority as my busted ribs would allow. “Ah know both you an' AJ know, an' yer both keepin' it from me fer some cockamamie reason. Jus' spare us all th' tension. Please.”
As soon as I pleaded, she turned her head from deliberately avoiding me back to facing me. Eye contact was going to be critical, so this was a good sign.
“Before...Before I tell you, I want to ask you this,” started June. “Why do you want to know, anyway? Lots of ponies have lots of different reasons, but...you're not 'lots of different ponies'.”
“June, t'ain't a matter o'--”
“I just want to know,” she insisted, keeping her eyes on me. “Honest.”
I groaned outwardly and emphatically.
“Why wouldn't Ah want t'know? Ah have more reason than anypony else! An' if'n yer feelin' sorry fer him, keep in mind Ah cain't 'zactly wreak vengeance or something stupid like that in this state. There ain't no reason not t'tell me, sugar...”, I finished with a gentler tone. Shoot, she didn't need my mess this early. She was nothing but wonderful to me this whole stay! I supposed...I supposed it was the severity of the mess that made me want to hack a pony down to size.
At least you're not claiming it was the air quality again. That's just dumb; do you really think like that?
But to be fair, the situation deserved to be treated honestly and without a thousand little peacekeeping measures. Even if the Hell of Peace were a hoax, the moral rang true.
...
She frowned deeper as she continued: “I'd just...rather wait until the whole deal blows over. I don't want anypony--”
“Gettin' hurt? What did Ah jus' say, June?”
“Anypony else,” she continued, clearly irritated. Crud. “It was an accident, after all. And if other ponies find out from me telling you,” she said with a hoof clearly pointing to the tabloid researchers hiding outside, “and they find him...who's to say an accident can't happen twice?”
That...was actually a good point. I couldn't even count the number of times AJ bucked the air out of mere frustration. It took a great deal of restraint not to do it myself when I was angry. But I did learn it; by every cloud in the sky, did I learn it. Caramel, on the other hoof...it was hard to say now. He knew what he did, and it probably deeply unnerved him.
Hmph. So that's your verdict on me. At least it explains AJ's reaction toward me.
“Well...”, I stalled, searching for options, “Ah'll tell you whut. You can jus' tell me in a way only Ah would understand.”
“Big brother!”
“...An' Bloom, Ah suppose.”
“Thank you.”
June stopped and stared into the middle distance. Oh, like she was going to slip out of this one!
“Look at me an' jus'...imply it. S'okay. Look me in th' eyes an' tell me, babe.”
With no escape, she ended up locking eyes with me. Such sweet eyes...the brightest emerald green outside of a jeweler's shop. Even when they were heavy-lidded or bloodshot, they still gave a clear picture of who she was without even trying. I never had to guess with her, never doubted her honesty: I just looked at her eyes. Who wouldn't get pulled into that effortless gaze? Who wouldn't have even a little bit more energy to get out of bed, just to see the mare with the forest glimmer? As I returned her stare and let myself melt into that glimmer...I couldn't think of a single soul that wouldn't do the same.
...Good. Sounds like things are going well.
I also couldn't think of an easier way to make her cave. And sure enough, she eventually shifted her gaze to the right.
“Dammit!”, said Junebug.
“Language!”, objected Bloom.
“Never mind that, sugarcube,” I said, silently feeling a little smug. “Now, I believe you were going to tell me, June?”
June sighed a similarly weary sigh as Fluttershy's. I had trouble sympathizing with this one, though. It had taken long enough to get this simple information, goodness me!
“Well...I brought up the idea with Applejack a few days ago, and she didn't deny it. But she didn't confirm it, either. It's just...given what's happened and who Caramel is, there's really only one place he has left. I-I don't know if that was what--”
“You did jus' fine, babe,” I soothed. “It's...it's a weight off my mind, that's all.”
At least it would be for a short while.
Thank Celestia that's over. The rest is just a request for me to respond...
---
“Well,” I said to the one pony in earshot, “that was a very entertaining forgery. I didn't know you dabbled in fiction writing, Braeburn.”
“WHUT?!”, cried my funny author. “Don' be makin' fibs like that, pardner. Shame on you fer even thinkin' Ah would make up a letter from mah own cousin! An' would you buck that darn tree already, if'n yer gonna pose like that?!”
I set the far-too-long letter down on the ground as carefully as I could. The pages stayed firmly against my shoe as it inched down, not fluttering in the wind or threatening to tilt too far in one direction. Once it was free to be swept away, I let the energy coiled in my legs tighten and vibrate...to a point.
"You've been doin' that all week, an' Ah'm gettin' annoyed jus' seein' it! Whut's so rewardin' 'bout holdin' yer legs against an apple tree like that, anyway? Ah jus' don' git that."
I bucked the tree I was threatening to buck for fifteen minutes, each Yellow Delicious tumbling down in as orderly a fashion as could be made. Then I relaxed my muscles calmly and stepped down, without scratching the bark. Everything went perfectly. It wasn't the performance that was the problem, no.
It was the reception.
“...Now!”, continued my employer. “Ah'm sure Ah don' know whut you mean 'bout forgin' anythin', Caramel. Not a clue.”
I looked at the one pony who willingly greeted me when I was here: the greatest success of my life. The town was beautiful again, completely restored. Nopony needed me anymore, and yet here I was. It wasn't that the rest of them weren't warm toward me. I couldn't say exactly what emotion greeted me throughout the town, sadly for me. All I could concretely say about the town occurred to me when this pony decided he could use my help. With the money I needed and the friends I needed even more...Braeburn's actions did show me that he wasn't my enemy. Although the money turned out to be a non-issue.
“...Maybe not,” I conceded. “I'm sorry for that, buddy, it's just...this letter was definitely made up by somepony. It's way too detailed and meandering; Big Mac would never have written this. Or the forger could have altered it. Yeah, they probably altered it to put in their own details...but why in any hell would they do that?”
“You gonna stop talkin' nonsense now?”
I came out of my reverie at the quip and looked to the sky. It was almost sundown.
“You watched me git th' letter from th' post, anyway. Albeit from back here. You sayin' somepony 'altered' it while it was in mah own hooves?”
The wind stopped. The letter hadn't done anything but flap in the crosswind, and now it just sat in front of me. It didn't do anything, nothing at all.
“...Braeburn?”
“...Yes, pardner?”
“Do you...do you like having me here?”
Braeburn frowned. But then he turned away and looked to the town as he answered me. I understood completely.
“It's hard t'say, really. You've got a heck of a mouth on ya, an' it's clear yer hurtin', but...even with everythin' you got goin' on, yer helpful an' you stay out o' trouble. Ah'm not worried 'bout you, t'be perfectly honest.”
“...But do you like having me here?”, I persisted for some reason.
Braeburn still looked at the town, and I still understood.
“Yer not mah kind o' pony. But Ah cain't blame you fer that. Jus' do yer job an' we'll be fine.”
“...Fair enough.”
“Oh, speakin' o' that...”, Braeburn continued, “erm...”
“You going to let me take care of the whole orchard, now?”, I teased. “I told you, you wouldn't regret it.”
“W-Well, that's 'zactly th' thing, really. But it's actually out o' mah hooves.”
What?
“Why would it be--”
“They...”, stammered Braeburn, “they've been talkin' 'bout th' fact we're hidin' you, an'...they don' jus' want free labor anymore. They want you t'work th' entire orchard in exchange fer keepin' this all under wraps.”
"..."
So there it was. I stood next to him as we both looked to the Sheriff's Office. The other townsponies must have gotten him on their side, and now they were showing their real colors. I supposed it shouldn't have surprised me, and quite frankly it didn't. Ponies and opportunity mixed extremely well this year; the letter got that part right, at least.
From a summer hero to an autumn slave...I supposed I had it coming.
“Well...I'm not really in a position to say no. I'll still have room and board, right?”
Braeburn said nothing until the sun finally set. Each and every star seemed to flicker inconsistently; some were brighter than others in strange places. I couldn't find any constellations with the confusing changes, so I just twirled Cheerilee for some time.
“Ah hate this,” I finally heard over the whistling metal. “Ah don' like usin' that word, but Ah hate this arrangement.”
“...I can stay with somepony else, if it's a bother,” I offered.
“S'not that. They jus' want a bite o' the rich life, an' they're gonna exploit ya fer it. It's DISGUSTING. Harbor a criminal, an' make him build you a palace? T'ain't th' Appleloosa Ah know an' love! Ah cain't even fathom it: before we even rebuilt everythin' from th' ground up, somethin' jus'...died in this town. That world-shaker knocked somethin' loose, an' Ah'm gonna see it git put back. Wuz it really an accident?”
“It's a downright shame,” I answered, “but I bet you have what it takes to...wait, WHAT?”
“Y-You heard me.”
The wind picked back up. The desert had already cooled to that horrible extreme again, piercing my insides with its cold barbs. Ponyville's winters never had winds so sharp; only three weeks and I was already losing morale. But that wouldn't affect me here: the answer was obvious. It was obvious! Why did everypony keep asking it when it was so damn obvious?!
“Yes, of course it was.”
“...Alright.”
“I was scared; I just...something took over.”
“Ah gotcha. Ah just wanted t'hear it from you.”
“Fine, but...why wouldn't it be an accident? Really. I'd love to know. Most of the gossip I hear when I'm close to town is what everypony's 'theory' is. What's so ambiguous about it?”
Braeburn stalled. If anything, he seemed a little peeved?
“Lemme ask you this, then,” said Braeburn. “You an' him...'zit gonna be like this for th' rest o'--”
“He has his life, and I have mine.”
“...”
“I-I mean, he wants to start a new life with his somepony. I feel I should just let him, and I'll...I'll clean up my mess and just start over.”
“Jus' start over?”
It was so fucking cold.
“Yeah. I'll figure something out. I've lived for long enough on my own. It'll...you know, I just remembered something.”
“Yes?”
“Could you deliver a letter for me tomorrow? It's about time I kept my promise.”
---
They forgot about me.
I blew into the desert wind alone. I flapped above the lucky trees alone. I flew over the barren wastes alone. And I was stuck against a mighty cliff face alone, with writing on my own face.
They never read what my face had to say. And I became stuck on the face of a cliff. I never saw what was written on it; I was facing the wrong way.
...write back to me, then it would get rid of the needless tension between us. I see what happened for what it is, and with time, you and everypony else will, too.
This brings me to what I need to say to you. I talked to Braeburn (in a private letter, in case you're worried), and he told me your sticky situation. And so I've decided...even though I appreciate the support and sentiment of it, I'm using the rest of the money to call off your case.
From what he told me, you seem to be struggling to start a new life. I don't want you to be haunted by what happened more than you have to be, and I know you're scared to death of something. So consider this my goodwill parting gift. I'll persuade them to drop the charges and to forgo investigating any accomplices. With this much, it'll be easy as pie. With that, Appleloosa can't blackmail you worth two bits...dear Celestia, I just wrote that sentence. I live in a world where that sentence exists.
They're still looking for your daddy; I doubt my 'persuasion' would end that search.
Anyway, if you don't want to come back to Ponyville, that's fine. It really is up to you. But if you change your mind, just know it doesn't have to end this way with us. Keep your promise and get help. It'll be fine. If you admit that you did it on purpose after the treatment, they should have pity on you; I know we do. I still care about you, even with June in my heart.
Stay safe,
“Big” Macintosh
P.S. I am deeply sorry about that mess I threatened; I'm really going to put that attitude behind me. But please don't make my efforts worthless by looking for him. You have your own problems.