//------------------------------// // And Now the Dessert // Story: My Big Fat Griffon Wedding // by LunaJack //------------------------------// BOOM! Gulliand yelled and crushed Cinnamon Roll to him as an explosion rocked the gazebo. Most of the members of their dumbfounded audience were surprised as well. The babies, Clipper and Puffball, both woke up wailing. Prism quickly comforted her little brother while Screwy and Mothy scurried to calm their daughter as cinnamon scented confetti rained down. The female draconequess glared at the pink party pony. “AUNT PINKIE!” “I KNEW IT!” squealed Pinkie Pie, ignoring Screwball as she leaped over the table to hug the new couple. “I KNEW the two of you were going to get married! I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!” “WHAT?” cried Gulliand in shock. “But…but how? We didn’t—" “Pinkie Sense!” the pink party pony replied. “My tail ticks back and forth like a metronome whenever there’s gonna be a wedding announcement and my tail’s been a-tickin ever since I saw you two this morning!” “When the tail’s a swingin’, wedding bells will be ringin’,” Cheese confirmed with a nod. “If it’s twitching, there’ gonna be a hitching,” said Blueberry. “If it goes tik-tok, somepony’s tying the knot,” added Raspberry. “A ticking tail means love will prevail,” intoned Cherry. “EXACTLY!” shouted Pinkie grabbing her party cannon for another volley. “CONGRAT—” POOF! A large cork appeared in the mouth of the cannon. POOF! Pinkie was returned to her seat beside her husband. The pink mare looked around in wide-eyed surprise. “Wow! I didn’t see that com--!” POOF! A large green apple appeared in her mouth. “Puffball!” said Screwy, looking sharply at her infant daughter who was sitting up in her basket, her little black horn alight. The little Changeling-Draconequess just yawned innocently and settled back down to sleep. “Okay, everybody,” said Twilight, standing up. “I think we’re getting off the subject." She turned to Cinnamon Roll and Gulliand with a smile. “Let me be the first to congratulate the new couple!” “Yes!” cried Screwball. “Congratulations!” “I’m so happy for you!” Fluttershy piped up. Discord stood, or rather floated, up from the table with a glass of cider held high in his eagle talon. “From one odd couple to another,” he said with a smirk. “Congratulations!” cried everyone. Even Rainbow Dash, whose mouth was screwed up as if she had tasted a lemon, gave a reluctant nod. Only two creatures seated at the table remained silent and still. Spike and Applejack sat frozen, staring with wide eyes. Cinnamon Roll’s smile faltered as she noticed their shocked expressions. Spike held his wife’s hoof tightly. He could feel her pulse racing and knew his own heart was about to pound out of his chest. His breath came out in short pants. “Pa? Ma?” asked Cinnamon Roll timidly. The couple just continued to stare, their minds far away. Applejack and Spike sat on a cushioned bench in the adoption center’s waiting room. Their hearts raced with excitement and trepidation. “Oh, Spike. Do you think the young’uns will like us?” Spike held his wife’s hoof tightly in his pudgy claw. Two little brown foals stepped timidly towards the waiting couple. The first was a colt with a short dark mane who looked to be about five years old. The other was a tiny filly, no more than two years old, with a cream-colored mane that somepony had styled into two wee braids. Both stared at the couple in surprise and awe. The colt’s eyes opened wide in delight. “Wow! Our new dad is a dragon?” Spike grinned. “Yeah. I hope that’s okay.” “It’s fine!” The colt scrambled onto the bench between Applejack and Spike. The tiny filly stared at the new couple shyly. Applejack leaned towards her. “It’s okay, Sugarcube. You can sit up here by me, if you like.” Slowly the little filly climbed up onto the bench and nestled down in Applejack’s lap like she belonged there. Tears formed in the farm pony’s eyes. “Ma?” asked the little filly. “Ma?” Applejack and Spike jolted as if waking from a trance. They blushed as they realized they had become the center of attention. “S-s-sorry about that,” stammered Applejack blushing. “I kinda got lost there for a minute.” She turned to Cinnamon Roll and felt a deep ache in her chest. Tears pricked her eyes. “Congratulations, Sugar Cube,” she whispered. She glanced at Gulliand her lips pressed tight. “He…he is a fine feller…” Suddenly the ache in her heart rose to her throat and a loud sob escaped her. Spike threw his arms around his wife, holding her tightly as tears slid down his cheeks. “OUR BABY GIRL’S GETTING MARRIED!” Applejack wailed. Big Mac stood up and quickly went to his sister’s side and embraced the couple in one of his strong arms. An emotional Cheerilee soon joined him followed by Fluttershy who fluttered across the table to lend her support. “It’s okay, AJ,” Big Mac murmured comfortingly. “Believe me, Cheerilee and I know just what you’re goin’ through.” “It about broke our hearts when Apple Blossom told us she was getting married,” said Cheerilee, wiping away a stray tear. Thunder Dash was stunned. “What? What was wrong with me?” he whispered to his wife. Apple Blossom rolled her eyes. “Nothing, sweetie. Shush!” “It was hard for us when we realized Screwy was getting married,” said Fluttershy soothingly. “It was especially hard for Discord. But everything turned out for the best.” She glanced lovingly at the former Changeling prince. “Mothy is a good husband and a great father.” “Almost as good as me,” added Discord with a smirk. Applejack gave a little huffing laugh at that. She raised her tear-stained face to smile at her brother and friends. “Thank you,” she whispered. She turned her gaze to Cinnamon Roll who was leaning against Gulliand for comfort. “I…We…love you, Darlin’. And we’re happy for you.” “W-what she said,” Spike choked, wiping his eyes with the back of his claw. The other guests sighed in relief. “Oh, Darling! This is so thrilling!” cried Rarity, clasping her hooves in excitement. “It’s been so long since I’ve designed a wedding dress for a member of our little group. Oh! I have some ideas already!” She snatched out her ever-present notepad and began a quick sketch. “And Mom gets to host the bridal shower!” cried the Tri-Pies, hopping up and down. “We need to let the Cakes know so they can bake you a wedding cake!” “Don’t forget the invitations to the kinfolk!” said Applejack, wiping her eyes. “Yep!” agreed Big Mac. “And I will officiate,” Twilight offered. “I might need to brush up on griffon customs, though. Oooh! I wonder if they still practice ceremonial piercings in the Kingdom! I might need to get a lance from—” “That won’t be necessary, Aunt Twilight,” said Cinnamon Roll quickly, looking a little pale. “We weren’t plannin’on goin’ all out. You see, we were plannin’ on gettin’ married right after graduation.” “Graduation?” asked Spike looking at them sharply. “That’s two weeks away! We’d never get the Apple kin here in time.” “Oh, dear! I have several projects that need my attention this week,” added Rarity, looking distressed. “I’d never have a proper dress ready for you in time.” “I know the Cakes are swamped with orders right now,” put in Blueberry Pie. “And Mom’s got that massive party next weekend in Manehattan.” Pinkie, who still had the green apple stuck in her mouth, nodded her head sadly. Cheese Sandwich slid a comforting arm over her shoulders. He looked at Cinnamon Roll with pleading eyes. “Couldn’t you wait just a few more weeks?” he asked. “So, we can all give you a proper send off?” The brown filly dropped her eyes to the table. “I…I can’t. You see it’s really important that Gulliand and I get married as soon as possible.” “Oh,” groaned the stallion in disappointment. Suddenly, his eyes went wide and his jaw fell open. “OOOOHHHHH!” “What?” asked Cinnamon Roll confused by the look of shock on Cheese’s face. She glanced across the table at her parents. Applejack’s eyes were wide as dinner plates while Spike’s green eyes were glowing bright. Wisps of smoke trickled thickly from his nostrils. The brown filly gulped. “P-P-Pa?” “Well, well, well,” drawled Discord, appearing in the air directly above the couple. “I must say this has got to be the most interesting dinner party I’ve been to in a long time. However, as entertaining as all this high drama is, I suppose it up to me address the elephant in the room. So, Cinnamon Roll,” the draconequess leaned down to grin into her face. “Do you happen to have a little cinnamon bun baking in the oven?” The air around the table almost vanished as everyone gasped in shock. “DISCORD!” “What?” he asked innocently. “You can’t tell me I was the only one here thinking it!” “But it wasn’t your place to ask, dear,” hissed Fluttershy, hurrying to shush her husband. Discord snorted. “Oh, like they were going to ask!” he said waving a talon at Applejack and Spike. He turned back to Cinnamon Roll. “By the way, you may want to answer my question before your Dad decides to roast your esteemed fiancé.” “Oh!” cried Cinnamon Roll, placing herself between Gulliand and her father. “No! No, it’s not like that! There is no…uh…bun…baking at this time. In fact, it might be a while before we bake any…buns.” There was a collective sigh of relief and one disappointed groan. “But I like cinnamon buns,” muttered Cherry. “Thank Celestia!” Applejack breathed her head bowed in gratitude. “Whoo, goodness! You scairt mah mules there for a minute.” “Yeah, mine too,” said Spike shakily as he returned to his seat. “Sorry about that,” he added to Gulliand. The griffon graciously bowed in response. “Hold on a minute,” said Apple Bloom suddenly. She narrowed her eyes at the young couple. “If you two ain’t, you know, expecting then why are ya’ll in such a big hurry to get married?” “Yeah, why is that?” asked Scootaloo. Cinnamon Roll swallowed hard as everyone looked at them expectantly. This was the part she was dreading. “W-well,” she stammered. “Gulliand got word this week that Princess Celestia has approved a grant for him to set up his restaurant!” “That’s wonderful!” exclaimed Twilight. “How much were you able to get?” “Ten thousand bits, madam,” replied Gulliand proudly. The ponies whistled at the amount. “I say, that is a very generous sum!” remarked Fancy Pants. “Do you have a site in mind, my boy?” “Yes, sir,” replied Gulliand. “My Grandmother owns a lot of land and some vacant houses. She is letting me have one of the houses to convert into a restaurant but we need to get up there as soon as possible before any squatters try to take over.” “We’d have to get a place to stay,” added Cinnamon Roll. “And it wouldn’t be right, us livin’ together without gettin’ married first.” Applejack and Spike looked away uncomfortably, knowing their daughter was right but hating the idea of her not having a proper wedding. They couldn’t recall any Apple family member that had not had a good old-fashioned wedding with all the trimmings! It just went against tradition! But…if they needed to then-- “Whoa, whoa, whoa! Just wait a minute!” Rainbow Dash’s gravelly voice interrupted their thoughts. The cyan mare stood up, bringing her forehooves down hard on the table as she eyed Gulliand suspiciously. “You said your Grandmother gave you an abandoned house to use for your restaurant?” “Yes, madam,” Gulliand replied. The Pegasus leaned across the table. “And your Grandmother owns land in Equestria?” she asked. Gulliand glanced worriedly at Cinnamon Roll. “Um…no, madam.” The griffin startled as the rainbow mare zipped over to him and pushed her face aggressively into his. “Then where is it?” “Griffonstone!” cried Cinnamon Roll before Gulliand could reply. “The Princess gave him a grant to set up a restaurant in Griffonstone.” The total silence that greeted that announcement was broken by a loud POP as Pinkie removed the apple from her mouth. “Whoa! Even I didn’t see that coming!” she cried. “Griffonstone’s a loooooooong way away! Even Cheesy hasn’t been to Griffonstone, and he’s been everywhere!” “Well, of course he hasn’t been there,” snapped Rainbow Dash derisively. “That’s because Griffonstone is a DUMP! The whole place is a mess! The streets are dirty and all the griffons live in run-down hovels!” “That’s not true!” cried Gulliand incensed. “Well, it is true of most of Griffonstone but there are many griffons who are well off. My family owns a fine home in the north part of town.” “King Grover’s castle is nothing but a ruin! It’s in worse shape than the Castle of the Two Sisters was before Discord got it!” the cyan mare ranted. “And they can’t do anything to improve it because the stupid griffons don’t care! They don’t care about nothin’ but bits!” “Rainbow Dash!” cried Twilight Sparkle, lighting up her horn. “That is enough! I will not tolerate species-ism!” “Oh, and their so-called legendary library? It was destroyed! Nothing left but books and paper left to rot on the ground!” Twilight dropped her aura as she gasped. “Oh! No! The horror!” Applejack gave Gulliand a pleading look. “Is any of that true?” she asked. The griffon lowered his eyes and nodded. “Yes, I’m afraid it is, Madam.” “See! What’d I tell you!” said Rainbow Dash smugly. “But that’s why Princess Celestia gave him the grant!” cried Cinnamon Roll. “So he…we…could open a restaurant as a place where griffons can get together, eat some good food, and learn about friendship!” She looked deep into the cyan Pegasus’ eyes. “Isn’t that what a child of one of the Element Bearers is expected to do?” “Hey! Don’t use that on me!” Rainbow Dash retorted. “I know what griffons are like! They’re all nice and wantin’ to be your pal, then they turn on you! You really wanna be married AND in Griffonstone when that happens?” She whirled around to face Applejack and Spike. “Come on, guys! You can’t let this happen! You can’t give your blessing to this!” “I am a grown mare, Aunt Rainbow Dash,” cried Cinnamon Roll before her parents could answer. “And I know my mind! I love Gulliand and he loves me. If Ma and Pa won’t give me their blessing…” Her voice caught as she tried not to cry. “If I can’t have their blessing…then we are going to elope!” “NO!” Everyone’s eyes turned to the head of the table where Granny Smith stood on her hind legs, her face like a thunderstorm. She was small and frail but at that moment she radiated a strength and determination that commanded every creature’s respect. Even Discord, who had been planning to make a snide remark regarding Rainbow’s judgement, chose to stay quiet. The elderly mare pointed a wrinkled hoof at Rainbow Dash who was still hovering above the table. “Siddown, boy! You’ve done said enough!” “What? I’m just—" “Sit your tail down right now, mister, ‘fore I use your wings fer a feather duster!” Rainbow Dash huffed then zipped back to her seat, where she sulked. The old Earth pony mare turned to Cinnamon Roll. “What’s this I hear about you eloping?” she demanded. “You think you’re gonna just run off and leave us to get married by some Justice of the Peace somewhere? Not on my watch, young’un!” “But, Granny…” “Don’t you ‘but Granny’ me! I said no elopin’ and I mean no elopin’!” Cinnamon Roll wilted under the Apple matriarch’s words, burying her face into Gulliand’s neck for comfort. Granny Smith continued. “You are a member of this here family and if you’re gonna get married, you’re gonna do it the right way, with a proper weddin’! That means you’re gonna have a proper weddin dress, a proper weddin’ cake, and a proper weddin’ ceremony with all your friends and kin watchin’ while you say ‘I do’!” Gulliand and Cinnamon Roll raised their heads in surprise. “W-what?” “I said if you two are gonna git married, you’re gonna do it right!” said Granny, banging a hoof on the table for emphasis. “That means you’re gonna wear a dress made special fer ya by your Aunt Rarity. AND you’re gonna get a big ol’ weddin’ cake with plenty of buttercream icing from the Cakes! AND you’re gonna let your friends and kinfolk throw you the biggest bridal shower this side of the danged Everfree!” “Darned straight!” muttered Prism, earning a glare from her mother. Gemstone, Cherry, Blueberry, Raspberry, Apple Blossom, and Dinky all nodded in agreement. “AND when you say your vows, you’re gonna be surrounded by your friends and kinfolk! The ones who care about ya the most!” A pained look crossed Granny’s face and her eyes grew moist. Concerned, Applejack, Big Mac, and Apple Bloom hurried to her side. The old mare grasped their hooves tightly before finishing. “I-I-I wasn’t there when your Pa got hitched and I ain’t never forgiven myself fer it. Please, don’t make the same mistake as me!” The three Apple siblings stared at each other in shock. None of them had ever heard their grandmother talk about their parent’s wedding before. The other guests were just as surprised but managed to remain respectfully quiet as the old mare collected herself. Finally, it was Cinnamon Roll who broke the silence. “Granny, Gulliand and I are leaving for Griffonstone the day after graduation. That’s two weeks away! We’d never have time—” “So, git married later,” Granny interrupted. “Git up there, stake your claim, but come on back and git married. Or have it up there! We all can travel!” “But…we’d be havin’ to live together without bein’ married,” said the brown filly blushing profusely. “Isn’t that a bad thing?” “Not really,” said Discord before Granny could reply. “Remember Fluttershy and I lived together for a while before we got married. Of course, I was forcing her to live with me in hopes of getting her to fall in love with me, but that is beside the point. I don’t recall anypony looking down on her for it.” “’Cuz they knew you’d blast ‘em to another dimension if they did,” Rainbow muttered under her breath. Granny sighed. “Cinnamon Roll, I’ve known you since you was knee high to me…and I ain’t that big to begin with!” Everyone chuckled at that. “You’re a good filly and I reckon if I can trust you to behave yourself in a big old city like Canterlot, I can trust you to behave up there in Griffonstone, too.” Applejack and Spike looked at each other and nodded. “That goes for us, too, Sugarcube.” “Yeah? Well, what about him?” demanded Rainbow Dash, pointing a hoof at Gulliand. “You’re actually gonna trust him with your daughter in Griffonstone?” Granny turned to the griffon and smiled. “I do! I like the boy. He’s got good manners, he loves cookin’, and he don’t mind talkin’ to old biddies like me! And I ain’t never seen any critter chop up onions as good as he does! That boy is a wiz!” Gulliand shrugged. “Talons do come in handy.” Discord waggled his eagle claw proudly. “Tell me about it.” “UGH!” Rainbow Dash threw up her arms in frustration. “None of that matters! What matters is what’s gonna happen when they get to Griffonstone! Do any of you know—" “Hey, Aunt Rainbow, ya wanna try some of these?” The mare paused her tirade to look at the bowl full of little chocolate balls being hoofed to her by Applespike. Her eyes narrowed suspiciously. “What is it?” she asked. The dragon-pony shrugged. “Just some spicy chocolate I got from Miss Bon-Bon today.” Sitting across from him, Twinkle Sparkle had to cover her mouth with her hoof as she realized what her friend was doing. “Be careful!” added Applespike as the cyan Pegasus leaned towards the bowl. “They might be too hot for ya.” Rainbow Dash snorted. “Hot? I can handle hot!” She snatched up three of the balls and tossed them into her mouth. Applespike and Twinkle watched closely as she chewed. “Huh! Not bad. Kinda bitter, but not as hot as some…” Rainbow Dash suddenly froze. Her eyes dilated. A warm pink blush seared her cheeks. “Are you okay, Dashie?” asked Soarin. “You’re not choking are y—EEP!” He squeaked in surprise as she grabbed him and kissed him passionately on the lips. After a heated moment, they broke the kiss long enough to speak. “We’regonnagogetsomeairseeyoulater!” The two disappeared in a rainbow-colored streak. Zany glanced at Applespike. “Dare I ask?” Applespike shrugged. “Let’s just say I gave Aunt Rainbow a little something to waken the passion.” “You sure woke up something,” the draconequess colt murmured, eying the chocolate curiously. “Might be something fun to try on Hearts and Hooves day…” “Oooooo! Chocolate!” SNAP The dish of chocolates disappeared then reappeared in front of Discord. Applespike, Zany, and Twinkle all gasped in horror as he levitated half the balls to his mouth. “Don’t look at me like that,” he snapped. “I’m not going to eat them all.” He plucked one out of the air and handed it to Fluttershy. “For you, my Sweet.” “Thank you, dear.” “Uncle Discord, don’t…” With a flick of his magic, the draconequess popped the balls one by one into his mouth and started to chew. Meanwhile, Fluttershy daintily bit into hers. Her pale-yellow cheeks flushed a pretty pink. “Ooooo! It tingles!” she said in a husky giggle. Discord was not listening. His whole body sported a dark pink blush. Wisps of steam trickled from his ears. Then, in a sudden flash of magic, he sported a tall top hat and long black cape. Without a word, he snatched up his blushing wife and with a dramatic swirl of his cape, disappeared. Zany sat up straight, tilting his head as if listening for something. “Uh, oh,” he muttered. “I think they’re gonna be busy for a while. Dad just sound-proofed the whole castle.”