//------------------------------// // Lotta Little Things // Story: Royals. Problem? // by Split Scimitar //------------------------------// Next morning, I wake to the wonderful rhythm of my colon at an ungodly hour. Even though I can fit in a nap, I decide against it, so for that I hop into the shower and use the hot, steamy water to refresh and wake up, since I’m quite stiff from sleeping awkwardly, and I want to acclimate as quickly as possible. Just in case I get invited to Congress, I put on a dress shirt and black pants, and so I don’t look out of place in the penthouse. Laughing at my own logic, I soon head downstairs and have some breakfast right at their opening of 6:30 am. Being the first customer of the day, I’m treated rather nicely, since I imagine most of the staff are at their highest energy. That said, what I order is for their sake an easy one. Classic eggs and bacon with some toast and a bowl of fresh fruit. To drink: coffee. Once paid, I slowly make my way to the Pentagon City metro station. Naturally, I decide to wait a few before purchasing my metro ticket. “Good morning,” I text Sol, “What time did you want to meet? I forgot to ask last night.” After about 20 minutes, I assume they’re still asleep, so I decide to head back to the hotel. When I return to my room, I lay down in bed and set an alarm for 10 minutes, snoozing at each interval until a response comes. “Hello Max,” Sol replies, “we’re just leaving for the metro station right now.” “Okay! See you soon!” Slowly, I head back to the station and purchase the ticket. Paying for a one-way fare, I board a blue line, electing to take the longer route instead of taking the yellow line and transferring. I’d much rather stay on one train even if it takes longer. How’s that for lazy? Our first stop on [both blue and yellow line] is The Pentagon. I watch as passengers light and board in no particular sequence, but it’s also early enough that there’s no unnecessary confusion, even though we are in the rush hour window. Rinse and repeat with Arlington National Cemetery. This stop nets more on than off to my surprise, so I prepare to surrender my seat, ultimately not needing to but losing the free seat next to me. Now arriving in Rosslyn, transfer to orange and silver line available. 4 stops to Metro Center. Ι elect to stretch, I surrender my seat, taken immediately by an older gentleman who boards after I stand. At the next station, the doors close, but soon after, an announcement comes from the driver, “Ladies & gentlemen,” it begins muffled by low quality speakers, “we’re currently waiting for a red signal to change. Should be about 5-10 minutes, then we’ll be on our way.” After two or three songs from my music library, without any signs of motion, the doors open again, followed by another announcement. “Ladies and gentlemen, we apologize. Due to a hazard in the next signal block, all metro services in this corridor are temporarily suspended. A loud groan from those on the train almost drowns out the rest of the announcement. “Please see a Metro agent to discuss compensation. At this time, we do have a replacement bus service on the way for those who require it. Please follow the signs to the bus transfer terminal, they’ll be boarding there, where they’ll accept your ticket. We appreciate your patience and apologize for the inconvenience.” I get out of the train as quick as I can but still queue behind quite a few, most of whom are from this train. “Hi, are you off the train at the platform?” “Yes. I’ll just take a refund on the value. I’m close enough to my destination.” “Okay. I’ll take your ticket. Was this paid by cash or card?” “Card.” “Okay. One second.” Working the magic of a computerized system, she then shreds the ticket and says, “Okay, your refund has been issued. It should show up as a credit for the remainder amount within the next two to three business days. Sorry for the inconvenience.” “Not a problem. Thank you for the help.” “Have a good day.” The operator smiles. I then exit the station to get good cell reception. If they’re on the red line, I don’t know whether or not they’re underground, so I do the only thing I can, start walking towards the Metro Center station. A few blocks later, my phone rings. “Hello?” “Hey Max, Starlight. We’re already at the Metro Center station. Where are you?” “Well, I’m bogged down at Foggy Bottom. Or maybe I should say Foggy Bottom bogged.” “Oh, I can see that now on the message board. ‘Orange, Silver, Blue Lines suspended service between Foggy Bottom and Farragut West.’” “Yeah. I left the station so I’m walking over to Metro Center now. Let’s meet at the Washington Monument.” “Okay. I’ll let them know. Sorry Max.” “Eh? I need the workout.” She chuckles. “Okay. Don’t take too long.” “I’ll try, I have about a mile and a half.” “Okay, bye.” “Cya!” Preserving some energy, I slow my pace and make out the memorials of Lincoln and World War II. I smile to seeing them, breathing a sigh of relief when I cross the street to that side. As I make for the giant obelisk, I look for a place to buy water before I meet the other five. After I buy a large 1 L bottle, I walk around the pencil and find them after going through half the bottle. “Hey,” “Good morning,” and “Sorry I’m late” are the three greetings I give to Starlight, Sol, Selena, Celestia, and Luna. “Are you meeting Ms. Skystar?” I then ask Sol and Selena specifically. “She said she wanted to see us, but I don’t know if she’s busy.” Sol replies. “Even if we don’t, there is an abundance of museums to visit.” “And one that I imagine you, Max,” Princess Celestia teases, “would love to show us.” “There’s another campus over at Dulles if we have the time.” I respond. “That’s where all the awesome ships are.” “Let’s try and make time for it.” Sol adds. “Where should we meet her?” Starlight asks. “Capitol Hill I suppose.” When we reach Capitol Hill, gunmen stand armed on the steps since assumably, Congress is in session. As we take seats under the shade of a tree, we wait for a few minutes before a very bright and cheerful woman embraces Sol and Selena tightly. I smile and prepare to shake her hand as she goes down the line, ending with me, to where she shakes my hand so much, I get giddy. Her excitement is contagious, and palpably so. Before she made it to the White House, she used to be under the care of Sol and Selena, only a few years after Cadance had gone off to Uni. She’d spend her summers and holidays here, as her parents were businesspeople in Boston. Now maintaining permanent residence over here, it was Sol and Selena who helped her find a place to settle by letting her stay with them throughout the entire home buying process. In exchange for living there, Skystar was to keep the house clean, since Sol and Selena themselves were busy in their own careers. When she produces the visitor passes for the house and senate, she is one short, unsurprisingly. Assuring her no hard feelings, I let her take the others on tour while I head for Air & Space, because no matter how many times I come here, I never get bored of it. After I head out of the museum, I get a status report from Glimglam. “We’re just out of the Senate. We’re on a Capitol tour now.” “No problem. Just let me know when you’re done.” I’m half-tempted to have everybody meet at the Udvar-Hazy center, but that wouldn’t be very nice of me. Instead, I find a smoking area. Not expecting them for at least another half hour, I run one stick dry. I get up and walk around the National Mall (you know, for the daily activity) before I get another text from Starlight. “We’re done. Skystar also has the rest of the afternoon off, so she’ll be joining us for the afternoon.” “Yay! I’m in front of the Museum of Natural History.” Deciding to be stealthy, I begin another stick. I’m not going to deplete this one for quite a while, so until then, I can enjoy it while I can. About 15 minutes later, I find them heading my way, so I put the stick away and meet them. “Hey! How was it?” “It was very nice. I love the intricacy of the artwork in the rotunda.” Princess Celestia says. “Likewise I enjoyed the historical connection. Being imprisoned in the moon for a thousand years unfortunately means I was not exactly present for the founding of thy country.” Princess Luna adds. “Glad you enjoyed it,” Skystar beams. “What would you like to do now?” “I just came from Air & Space.” I respond. “Of course, from our resident pilot! Have you been to the Udvar-Hazy Center?” “It’s been a long time. I’d love to go, but it’s not a big deal.” “Are you kidding? We should go!” “Something for tomorrow then?” “Sure.” Selena replies. Eventually, we find ourselves at Shake Shack. Eyeing the royals to see what they’ll get, I decide to head to Oyamel for my obligatory grasshopper tacos, despite Sol wanting to go tonight. To her I say, “I’ll just have grasshopper tacos twice!” “Okay. If you like them that much.” “It’s the only place I can get them.” “Very well then. We’ll be here.” “Order an extra drink though.” “Will do.” With that, I head a few blocks out and order six Chapulines tacos. With a thanks and hefty salivation, I head back to Shake Shack to join the others, who surprised me with a Diet Coke. As we dig in, I notice Luna and Celestia eyeing my tacos intently. “Want some?” I ask. “What are those?” Celestia asks. “Grasshoppers.” “Yes please!” “Here.” I say taking a taco out. “Anyone who wants to try.” “You eat locusts here?” Starlight asks. “In some cultures, it’s a delicacy.“ “As it is in Equestria as well.” Luna adds as she receives the taco from her sister. She takes a couple out rather than biting into the tortilla. Immediately, she coughs. “So salty.” She says as she goes for her drink. “I like them though.” The others all give it a try, with none objecting but instead equally critical of the saltiness as Luna. Celestia, in exchange for a taco, offers a portion of her burger that she oh so carefully sliced. When we finish, I top off with Grape Fanta instead then wash the meal down with a couple cups of water. Since we’re in the area, we head for the Archives to see the Declaration and Constitution. Skystar channels her inner docent and walks us through everything she knows about them, to the awe of the Equestrians, who intently read all the informational bits on these legal documents on which the country was founded. Following that, we soak up some sun at the Navy Memorial before Skystar decides to map out the next places to go. Unfortunately, due to limitations on flow, even a private tour with White House staff cannot go through, as they have reached their peak for today. Since we’re a few hours from sunset, we decide to explore the war memorials where we first met. From there, we can head out of the city. As we walk through WWII, I stop for Bataan specifically, since it was there that I lost my great-grandfather. Through Vietnam, I run my fingers along the wall, passing over various names, but no one I can say I know. With just enough time to avoid evening peak, we stay here for a little while before we head to Oyamel for dinner. I don’t deviate from my lunch except to get Horchata to drink. Once our food comes, we dig in slowly as Skystar is talking to Sol about her work. Starlight then says to me, “I hope we get to talking about their hire flight. I don’t want you to feel like you wasted your time.” “It’s not a waste, but I hope so too. I need to know so I can prepare my equipment and such.” “Max,” Selena then says to me, “we’ll do Hawaii.” “Where do you want to start?” “Hawaii.” “Alrighty. Are all of you going?” “I’m not. I’ve got a busy workweek coming up. Plus, I’m going to Boston to see my mom.” “Nice.” “Would you like to rent a car from me?” “No, no. We’ll just rent on the island.” “Okay. I’ll have an airplane ready when you want it.” “Day after tomorrow okay?” “No problem. I’m checking out and returning my rental that day anyway.” “Okay.” Next morning, I head for the Hazy center to time my arrival with their opening. I roll in and grab one of the best spots on the lot, with the others rolling up in two cars. I pay for everyone’s parking (admission is free) and hold back all my restraint to not go full on “kid in a candy store” as I excitedly soak in the place, since it’s been a really long time since I’ve been here. The others stay close to me for obvious reasons, but to the confusion of Starlight and Sol, I’m here purely to take in the scene rather than take any pictures. “Do you want me to take your picture with any of these planes?” Starlight asks, giggling. “Your excitement is showing.” “No thanks, I’m good. I’m just glad to be here. Plus, even with my phone, pictures just don’t do justice.” “I see.” Passing the SR-71 that starred as Jetfire in Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen, I admire the other aircraft on display here. Of the greatest significance to me are the following: Boeing 367-80, predecessor to the 707 jet, Boeing’s first jet ever produced. A Concorde, formerly operated by Air France, registration F-BVFA. Space Shuttle Discovery, who brought the Hubble Space Telescope into space. Enola Gay, the Boeing B-29 Superfortress that dropped Little Boy on Hiroshima. FedEx’s very first aircraft, a Dassault Falcon 20 named Wendy. When we head outside to admire some of the warbirds, my heavy breathing shows up, which worries Sol. “Are you okay?” “Yeah,” I chuckle, “I’m just venting my excitement. Since it’s been so long, I’ve forgotten how incredible being here makes me feel. I feel kind of weird for it though.” “Why is that weird?” “I’m a grown adult. I have to show some restraint lest I look unprofessional.” She chuckles. “Haha! Max, I speak as a client, you’re not on the clock. If it helps, just relax. I’m sure you’re a great pilot, but you don’t need to prove you’re a professional until we board for Hawaii.” “Trust me, and I mean this in the best way possible, you don’t want to see me like that. I become a boy trapped in a man’s body.” We both share a laugh as the others return, not having spent a whole lot of time apart. “Not interested in anything here, huh?” I say to them. “Unfortunately no. The only things that fly in Equestria are winged creatures and Cloudsdale.” “Probably a good thing there aren’t any airplanes or such there.” “Most pegasi I imagine would push to have them banned anyway.” Celestia ponders. “The Friendship Express would too. They would be afraid they’d get driven out of business.” Luna adds. “Well, I’ll tell you what, if the opportunity to take an airplane to Equestria existed, I’d use it as a house. A houseplane if you will.” Celestia smiles and nods. “Thank you for joining me.” I tell the others as we make our way out. “I appreciate your time.” “Of course, Max! I look forward to flying with you.” Celestia responds delighted. “Beg pardon, but aren’t you alicorns?” “Yes?” Celestia responds, half-knowing what I’m about to ask. “At the risk of sounding rude, why would you be excited to fly on an airplane?” “The answer is simple: we’ll be flying not of our own power.” “Oh,” I answer as if the obvious slugged me in gut, “I’m sorry for sounding rude. I’m sure that if I go to Equestria, I would understand.” “Not to worry, my little friend.” Celestia smiles. “Well, I’ve seen everything I need to here. We can do whatever you want now.” “We’ve still got lots of time,” Skystar says, “do you want to go to the Inner Harbor?” “I’m game.” I respond. “Though I oughta go to the bathroom.” “It’ll take at least an hour, plus rush if there will be any. Good call.” Skystar says as she follows suit. “I’m sure the beltway will be pretty bad,” I say. “It’s not the beltway that’s bad, it’s what happens inside the beltway.” She winks. “Shift. Happens.” I say deadpan as possible, which makes her laugh. “I know, I deal with it daily.” We both share a hearty laugh at that. 10 minutes later, I’m out, but since I beat Skystar, I head for the gift shop, with Luna and Sol following behind me. Ultimately finding some interesting things but electing not to make any purchases, I join the others. “Alrighty. I have room for 1, or 2 or 3 if you don’t have any legs.” “What do you mean?” Starlight asks. “I’m in a convertible.” “Oh, right.“ “Anyone gonna ride with me?” No takers. “Alrighty. I’ll follow you.” Making note of the two cars, I note the make, model, color, and plates, because that’s what my brain is wired to do. Once we’re settled onto the beltway, I quickly get bored of all the trees off the side of the road, because as my Marylander friends say, “every road in Maryland looks the same,” even I-95. When we leave DC behind, I turn up my music and prepare for a difficult stretch ahead. Traffic is approaching prime rush, so any lane changes and turns may be a challenge. Checking the weather, not a cloud in sight; I wait until the next red light, which would be at our off ramp, check to see that the roof is unobstructed, then as soon as it’s stopped, I quickly put her in park and press the latch button. The sound of whirring electric motors now largely dictates my heartbeat as the roof folds up, then ever so slowly goes down. I keep the latch held down through the process. Just as the roof disappears from the rear view mirror, providing an unobstructed view of the car behind me, traffic starts to move. I keep it held down even as the car in front of me inches up. Not 3 long seconds later, the chime and message of “top down” illuminate, and immediately, I put it back in gear and give it a burst of throttle to quickly close the gap, to prevent any rogue driver from cutting me off. As we roll into the city of Baltimore, the not-unusually derelict M&T Bank Stadium lights provide a nice beacon as we make for the Inner Harbor. The unusually-lit Camden Yards must have a game happening tonight, since there’s quite a crowd around it. Because of the large throngs of crowds going to the game, we wait quite a while for our next turn, onto Pratt, right next to the Baltimore Convention Center. As soon as we break free, we pass plenty of “no game parking” signage on the way to the densely-crowded lot for the Inner Harbor. When I pay for my parking, I find a spot far from the others, so once I put the top back up, I join them and follow Sol and Skystar. I’ve been here once before, and I was under the guidance of a very die-hard Baltimorean, so I never really got a chance to explore the place myself. After going through a few shops and such, we find ourselves hungry for dinner, so after a verbal consent, we head for dinner at Fogo de Chão. By meal’s end, I’m halfway comatose but beyond satisfied. With nothing else to do, we head back to the entrance and discuss the plan. “My flight back to Chicago leaves at 5:45, so I’ll get back to Chicago at around 7. From there, I’ll try and get into Dulles, since that airport doesn’t require strict paperwork, we’ll board, and be on our way to Kailua-Kona.” “This is where we leave you then.” Skystar says. “Yeah.” “Can I have a hug?” “Of course!” I smile, happy to oblige. She hugs me tightly and says, “Ooh! Let’s exchange numbers before I forget!” “Welcome to the club. You can join my client list.” “I’d be happy to!” Once exchanged, she sends me the text of “Skystar”, to which I reply “Scimitar. Split Scimitar. Just call me Max.” With that, I exchange hugs with everyone else, give a tentative departure timeframe of “8 or 9 am” and head back to the Ritz. Awake at 3 am, checked out before 4. Once the rental is returned, I check my boarding pass and go through security. I’m one of the first people at the gate. The pilots are doing their preflight, so I smile and watch them at work. When the gate agent arrives, he boots up the desk and changes the matrix message from the previous flight at this gate, which was to Newark. As it’s before sunrise, I let out a few straggle yawns before the gate area becomes saturated. Soon enough, the gate agent makes the first announcement of the morning, “Attention in the terminal, those of you traveling on United flight 1268 with service to Chicago, we will begin boarding here soon. All ticketed and confirmed passengers please report to gate 10 for an on-time departure.” When we begin boarding, first class gets called, and to my absolute and utter surprise, I’m the only one who walks forward. “Welcome aboard, Mr. Scimitar.” When I reach the boarding door, I settle into seat 1B and place my bag overhead. The steward in first class asks if he can help, to which I decline, but ultimately he adjusts my bag for easy claim when we alight. After I sit down, the other passengers follow in closely behind. After about 9 or 10 other passengers, no more come down the jetway. “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome aboard United Airlines flight 1268, heading up to Chicago. If you would find your seats and find a space for your bags, we’ll be underway shortly. Good news for all of you, including our active crew, there are only 15 people on the manifest. This means that at present, everyone going to Chicago is now on the plane. However, we still encourage you to find your seats and get situated quickly so we can beat Chicago’s morning rush. I hope that you will find some overhead bin space, because if you can’t, you have too many items.” A few of us, myself included, chuckle. Mostly because I’m pretty sure I have the least amount of things, since my duffel bag is all I brought and I can’t make any assumptions about other passengers’ checked bags. Soon after, the ramp agent double checks the manifest and after verifying all aboard, the door closes, baggage handlers load and shout as the airplane is loaded, and once everyone is seated, I get excited. I’m the only passenger in first class.