once upon a time
You had a little filly who wanted a hearth's warming
and with it
a gift like no other
to spend her day
with the Light of her life
who she flew to like a moth
orbiting
You
even when it hurt her
she wanted this so badly
her feelings burned after her in the halls
leaving all the smoke You should have seen
because she
loved You
hated You
wanted You
to sit with her
for a day
say everything was canceled
but the time You would spend with her
like a Mother would
together we could have
had such memories
that went beyond a few hours
when You would hoof me my gifts
with a smile
and tell me how we had
two and a half hours
before
You had somewhere
and everywhere else in equestria to be
instead of getting to play with me
every time the little filly
told You to stay just a little longer
and every reason why You should have
You found another way to tell her no
leaving her in a pile
of everything she hadn't wanted
because of how duty calls first
or so You always said
she only ever tried
to find ways to keep busy when You were gone
but the Sun's nephew had a family
and Her shadow would take holidays off
only because You told her to
so i was alone
for most of every hearth's warming
with nothing but gifts
from You
grandmother
Your shadow
the cards You made Your nephew send me
{don't think that i couldn't tell}
{or hadn't heard the way You pleaded-demanded him}
{for the 'sake of the holiday' and how 'she's just a filly'}
with only a big empty castle
full of places to hide
to spend her time
is it any wonder
she would find
herself
getting lost
in all the spaces
You never let her see
what better than a room
bearing a golden lock shining
under dust
above the gray heart
of a rarely traveled hall
to enchant a filly feeling so discarded
one look through the keyhole
gave her preview to a world of dust
dancing over and around
everything inside she could not see
except for shades of a rainbow
pale and faded
that beckoned her as nothing else had
with no wards on the door
(something so odd for You)
the lock melded to her magic's fire
until she could push it open
and step inside
somewhere that hadn't been secret enough
to a single, curious filly
was the skeleton key to
when Your words and silence
wielded in equal measure
had been enough for everypony else
i had stepped into
somewhere filled with hundreds of presents
all wrapped up by Your meticulous hooves
in papers that You would choose
their bows weighed down by dust
and under it all
not a single name listed on each
when i checked the receipts
folded under each
by a hoof i knew too well
i marveled at how
for over three hundred years
You bought gifts for nopony
now they had fallen into her hooves
this treasure trove
of gifts numbering
over nine hundred
their mystery far too tempting
for her to ignore
knowing these belonged to nopony
other than she who claimed them
pulling back layers
of paper that had once been like petals
plastered with preservation spells
making their delicate sheets glitter
resistant to time
if not to dust
but new in the little filly's heart
from within clouds of tissue paper
she pulled some most curious things
untouched books of poetry
crystal inkwells carved like shooting stars
gowns in all covered in night scenes
made bright by all the gaudy colors You loved
quilts sewen with the tiniest jewels
cut just so
to shape constellations
and telescope lenses worth more than grandmother's house
from one particular box
the lonely little filly
found an ursa minor
bearing a soft coat of twinkling stars
two shining black button eyes
and a tiny velvet nose
despite all its festive trimmings
Your little filly knew how to recognize
a toy that was as abandoned as she was
so she let hours slip by
cradling the star-beast idly
and clad in a dress too long for any mare
she could imagine
with an unused silver tiara on her head
pretending she was a princess too
by the time You found me
i had my hours of fun
lost and alone
in the very halls i lived
where i was always reminded they were Yours
and the guards were to check in on me
as gold-clad, official foalsitters i never needed
or wanted
You had me drop everything
betrayal stuck under Your perfect plaster face
leaking out through Your haunted eyes
as You told me to put everything back
remove everything i had put on
only after You had spent enough time
sobbing
asking me if i knew what i had done
while never telling me what that was
i left that room
You had me never speak of it again
the next time i found the door
it had been warded of lonely fillies
with magic to keep everypony out
and cold new locks to defy my fire
like i was Your no-good grave-robber
she had never seen You cry before
nor did she ever see it again
in silence
You finally taught me something
how to fester without drawing attention
my most important lesson
right there
took me years to master
from there
i pretended hearth's warming day could still be
happy