Atychiphobia

by Ice Star


In the Sun's Shadow

by the time i learned what pride was
mine was in pieces under Your hooves
and i would do anything to get it back

in its place
You left me
with feelings
i had never wanted to name
even if
i loved
sliding into them

they made me think about what my world would be
if only You loved me

more than grandmother
or the guards i saw every morning
and everypony else
who i had ever known

the Sun was a Goddess seared into my mind
and i let Her scoop out where all thoughts
of bright star and sunrise song might have been
(and grandmother too)
until those two strangers
were lost in Her light
of the Goddess
who was my world

who
gave each test
ordered my every move
dictated every meal
decided all bedtimes
assigned everything i ever got to read
counted every minute
of my day
before i ever knew them
and
poured the color of my life
within all the lines She drew for me

is it any wonder that i made
the Center of the Universe
into the Mother i never had?