The stage was set, and the crowd was gathering. Logan peered out from behind the curtain, looking for familiar faces among the growing audience. Twilight walked up next to him, giving the audience a nervicited look.
“I still can’t believe you chose help us put on the most important play of the season,” Twilight gushed, glancing at Logan. “Do you know what an honor this is?"
Logan grinned cheekily at Twilight. “After the last fifty times, you asked me?” he replied, letting the curtain fall while he walked backstage. “No, can’t say I really do,” he finished.
Twilight rolled her eyes, while they returned to their fellow ponies, all of whom were preparing for the start of the play.
“Okay, guys,” Logan said. “You all set for this?”
The group nodded, though Fluttershy was shivering in the corner.
“I don’t know if I can do this, Logan,” Fluttershy admitted as he approached. “I don’t like every pony… looking at me.”
“Easy now, Fluttershy,” Logan said, nuzzling her mane. “You’re just gonna be in the background. Just do what you do best, and the play will be over before you know it.”
“R-Really?” Fluttershy asked.
“Yeah,” Spike told her, already in costume. “Besides, Logan’s the main star; everyone’s gonna be watching him.”
“Yeah,” Rainbow Dash grumbled. “They are, aren’t they?”
Logan grinned up at her. “You want the role, Dash?” he replied. “You’re certainly grumpy enough.”
Rainbow Dash scoffed. “Nice try, Logan, but I’m not passing up the chance to see how a wolf acts.”
“If you think I’m gonna humiliate myself,” Logan replied. “You’ve got another thing coming.”
The two grinned at each other, only broken up when Rarity came onstage.
“Curtain in two minutes,” she sang.
“Thank you, curtain in two minutes,” the group replied.
As the pack moved to their places, Logan gave Carol a nervous look.
“And Carol?” he asked.
“Mm?” she replied.
“That book Celestia gave you,” he said. “You’re absolutely sure Luco didn’t tamper with it?”
Carol nodded. “It was checked and pre-screened by both of the Princesses, then by the Royal Guard, and by both of us,” she insisted. “If Luco did do something to it, we’d have found it long ago.”
Logan nodded. “I still wish Celestia would just take the risk and send him back.”
Carol shrugged. “You heard the report same as mine: Luco only got through due to Discord. Opening the portal now could only invite something worse than Luco through.”
“Nothings worse than Luco,” Logan refuted.
“Then clearly, you haven’t met Kira,” Carol replied. "Or Myst."
Logan’s ears flared at that, before Spike raced over to them.
“Guys!” he yelled. “Curtain’s in one minute!”
“T-Thank you, one minute,” Carol replied, before giving Logan a grin. “So, Logan,” she said. “Ready for the stage.”
Logan grinned, and flipped the hood of his costume over his head.
“Born ready,” he replied with a grin, even as he flashed back to how he had gotten into this situation.
#
“So, you’re saying that the North Kingdom DIDN’T have a man named Santa Claus, who turned children into reindeer?” Celestia asked in confusion.
“NO!” Logan howled in frustration. “I’m telling you, Luco’s not going to give you a straight answer. All he’s going to do is lead you on.”
“Like Carolina did with the Royal Scientist Division?”
“Exactly.”
“Hm,” Celestia noted. “A shame. His description of a ‘Christmas’ seemed quite lovely.”
Logan paused. “Christmas?” he asked.
“It sounded quite similar to Hearth’s Warming Eve,” she noted, grinning at Logan’s confused expression. “Where all three pony tribes put aside their differences to fight against the Windigos.” She tilted her head. “Is Christmas similar at all to that?”
Logan sighed. “It used to be,” he muttered. “But humans corrupted it, like they corrupt everything.”
Celestia’s ears perked forward, intrigued. “Perhaps you could explain it to me,” she offered.
Logan turned away. “Sparkle can send you a report,” he dismissed.
“Or,” Celestia offered coyly. “You could tell all of Canterlot. We put on plays as part of our Hearth’s Warming Eve celebration. I’m sure they’d enjoy a bit of variety.”
Logan laughed. “Those high-class pricks?” he asked. “Keep on dreaming.”
Celestia rolled her eyes as Logan walked away. “Very well,” she said. “I suppose I can give Luco a bit of parole time to explain this interesting holiday…”
Logan had darted back so fast, he plowed into Celestia. The guards converged on him, but Celestia waved them aside with a hoof, grinning up at Logan’s glower.
“Don’t. Let. Him. Loose,” Logan growled softly.
Celestia just grinned. “Can I assume you’ll explain his holiday then?” she replied coyly.
Logan’s ears flattened, and he bared his teeth, barely glancing at her guards. “These guys won’t stop me from biting you again,” he vowed.
Celestia just tilted her head up and exposed her neck. “You may strike when ready,” she replied. “But one way or another, I’m finding out about this ‘Christmas.’ The real question is ‘who’s going to tell me about it?’ You, or Luco?”
#
Logan nursed the slight bruise he had gotten from an overly ambitious guard, but grinned in satisfaction as he noticed a slight red mark on Celestia’s neck, barely concealed by her regalia.
In the time, it took for him to ponder, the opening musical had passed. He had barely paid attention as the ponies danced through the makeshift town they had built for the stage, setting up streamers, decorations, and more importantly, laying out presents. Dozens of the tiny little boxes created makeshift houses for the stage.
But Logan shook off his pondering, and flipped the hood for his costume up, as he heard Spike begin the narration:
“Everyone in Gaia's Kingdoms liked Christmas a lot,” Spike began. “But the Wolf…!”
That’s my cue, Logan though. His memory of Celestia bringing out his best glower, he lurked onto the stage, his hood thankfully giving him some shade from the spotlights that shined on him.
“…who lived North of North… did not!”
Logan bared his fangs, holding back a chuckle as the crowd gasped.
“I know, crazy right?” Spike muttered to the crowd.
Logan bit back another giggle. For once, his interests and the interests of the ponies were aligned. He could try to ruin the play, but the only way that could really happen was for him to be cheery and optimistic. And that was Pinkie’s thing, not Logan’s.
“The Wolf hated Christmas,” Spike continued to narrate. “The whole Christmas season. Now please don’t ask why, no one quite knows the reason…”
“Are you kidding me?!” Logan demanded, racing up to Spike. Again, Logan pondered darkly, all in the script. But, it does give me the chance to say this:
“Can’t you all see?!” Logan growled, turning to the audience. “That you’ve made this season crap! I should catch your eyes with an Ursa Minor trap!”
Even though that would probably blind you, his thoughts noted. But he persisted, while Rarity and Fluttershy came out.
“I mean, your greed is atrocious. Your attitude makes me weep! You scare retail workers; you generally act like a creep!” His voice softened as he gazed up at the stars above the stage. “The concept is classic; no fixing required. Whoever said it should be updated is a big fat liar! Gifts and entitlement don’t make the holiday work; it just makes you look like a big dumb, greedy jerk!”
As he spoke, Rarity just generally acted like a creep to Fluttershy, yanking gifts away from her and kicking mud in her face. A strained look was on the white mare’s face as she acted, like she didn’t want to be doing this, but Fluttershy just looked absolutely miserable, and not just due to Rarity’s feigned abuse. Logan had to remind himself that this was the reason why he gave her the role, but it still tore his heart to see her like that. But, he stuck to his script, knowing that she would be able to retreat backstage soon enough. Still, despite his inner assurance, he sighed in relief as Fluttershy was ‘chased’ offstage by a belligerent Rarity, waving a purse like some sort of weaponized sling. Granted, he hadn’t actually had that much experience with humans during the Christmas season, but getting to scream out against one of the biggest flaws of not just humans, but also dragons, was rather cathartic. Thankfully, Spike just took his anger for passionate acting, and rolled on without missing a beat.
“And the more the Wolf thought that this holiday stunk, the more the Wolf thought…” Spike prompted.
“I must stop this whole thing!” Logan declared. “Why, for 23 years, I put up with it now!” He crouched, forming a cunning stance. “I must find some way to keep Christmas from falling. But… how?”
He looked back at the presents across the stage, making sure that the audience could see his dawning epiphany.
“And then… the Wolf got an idea,” Spike narrated. “An awful idea.”
Logan turned back to the audience with the most malicious grin he could sport, noting with particular glee how some of the royals in front actually scooted back with nervous looks in their eyes.
“The Wolf got a wonderful, awful idea,” Spike said. Logan resisted a cackle at how evil Spike managed to sound.
“I know what to do!” Logan shouted.
“The Wolf said, standing tall!” Spike interjected.
“If I can’t enjoy it, I’ll ruin it for them all! A sabotage of this holiday is just what they need! I must act quickly; my claws must take heed!”
Logan raced into the present strewn ‘town,’ while Spike continued to narrate.
“And so off he went,” Spike narrated. “Flying off like a shot! He began stealing presents. He took quite a lot! He stole from the weak and he stole from the guard. He stole presents that were soft and presents that were hard!”
Spike made it sound a bit too whimsical, though Logan couldn’t really fault him. It was funny enough getting to snatch presents away from Rarity after her earlier performance, but he found out quite fast that trying to carry a bunch of presents wasn’t as easy as Twilight made carrying books with magic look. Logan briefly tried to use his own magic, only for the presents to explode before him. Growling, he began throwing the presents off to the side of the stage, with Applejack and Fluttershy thankfully waiting to grab them and cart them away.
“But as the wolf took the presents and started to shove…” Spike narrated.
“Hey!”
“Cried a voice, like the coo of a dove!”
“Or more like a wolf,” Logan commented.
Because that was who had popped out from the first pile of stolen presents; Carol, with a snarl that just couldn’t reach her eyes.
“You’re a mean one, Mr. Wolf,” Carol cried. “You really are a heel! You’re like a bad banana with a greasy black peel!”
Logan chuckled, and kicked the last of ‘her’ presents off stage.
“Back off, little pup,” he declared. “Get out of my sight. You ruined Christmas, and must suffer justice’s might!”
“Ruined Christmas?” Carol asked. “How can this be?”
“Your greed and need for gifts; it’s obvious, to me?”
Carol sighed. “I didn’t start that,” she claimed. “It’s been around since the dawn of time. A time where ponies and wolves talking would be an unspeakable crime.”
“Oh?” went the crowd.
“And going to her shelf, his attention on a hook,” Spike narrated. “She read him a passage from a very old book.”
Logan watched the book Carol took from the side with suspicion. Luco had given it to Celestia when he found out she was making this play, and Logan was still convinced there was something he had done with it. But the only thing that seemed to be wrong with it was the blatantly different religion implied in its pages. Yet Carol had always been good at speaking, and despite the words not being meant for a deity like Celestia, she managed to make it sound vague enough that it could be talking about anyone.
“There were shepherds residing in the fields, keeping watch over their flocks by night,” Carol read. “When an angel of the Creator stood before them, the glory of the Heavens shining around them. The shepherds were terrified, but the angel said to them, ‘Don’t be afraid, I have good news for you. Tonight, a Savior is born to you. You will find them wrapped in baby cloths, and lying in a bed of hay.’ Suddenly, many angels descended from the Heavens and joined in praising their Creator. They said ‘Glory to the Greatest Creator in the Highest, and on Earth, peace and goodwill towards life.”
Logan chanced a glance at their audience. Many of them were shooting glances at Celestia, and more than a few still looked slightly offended. But Celestia herself was watching with full investment.
“Don’t you see?” Carol asked, for once not rhyming. “That night was the first Christmas. Where our Creators loved us so much, that they gave us their greatest gift. So, everyone could be with them one day. Christmas isn’t about getting. It’s about giving. And it’s especially about a just-born savior, who was the greatest gift of all.”
“Aw,” the ponies cooed. Logan allowed himself a small moment of pondering. Admittedly, the message was nice. But…
“A lovely concept,” Logan admitted. “I won’t deny. Yet people seem to have forgotten that. Care to tell me why?”
Carol couldn’t reply. Granted, she probably could have, but they hadn’t thought of any lines for her that wouldn’t impact the story. Logan nodded, and swiped the book from her paws.
“I assumed so,” he said. “Bye!”
He shot across the stage again, Carol scooting backstage while Spike picked up his spiel again.
“And so, the heist continued; though stealth was for naught,” Spike narrated. “For now, others knew his intentions, and battles were fought.”
Applejack and Rainbow Dash shot out, and Logan dodged around them. For a moment, they circled each other. This was, without a doubt, Logan’s favorite part; Rainbow Dash and Applejack were actually fun to fight, and they made a great pair, with Applejack using brute force while Rainbow Dash zipped around the air.
“He fought off the law, and he fought off the guard,” Spike narrated, as Logan made it to the right side of the stage. “Until he evaded them by dunking them in lard.”
It had admittedly been one of Logan’s least impressive rhymes, but in the end, the show had to go on, and as Applejack and Rainbow Dash tried to drive Logan off the stage, he seized the bucket that was lying behind the curtain and hurled it at them. They fell off the stage dramatically, heads covered in a yellow goopy substance, while Logan returned to the presents and scooped them up, his tail wagging while he paraded away.
“But before he could complete his theft,” Spike reminded Logan.
“Hey!”
“Cried a voice, off to his left.”
Logan turned, to find Pinkie, who had popped out of one of the boxes.
“You’re a mean one, Mr. Wolf,” she declared. “You have termites in your smile! You have all the sweet tenderness of a seasick crocodile.” She took her pet alligator out of the box and hugged it. “And given the choice between the two of you; I’d take the crocodile.”
Logan rolled his eyes. “Hush, little pony, get out of my way,” he declared. “You’ve ruined Christmas and now you must pay!”
“Ruined Christmas?” she demanded. “No, that cannot be so!”
“Christmas used to mean something,” Logan argued. “Before it became about presents with a bow.”
Pinkie sighed and smiled.
“But Christmas is always filled with presents,” she insisted. “Large, medium and small. Sometimes the most important things, aren’t very big at all.”
She indicated the back, as the Cutie Mark Crusaders appeared, giving each other gifts.
“The joy of making friends,” Pinkie continued. “Little ponies spreading cheer. Give a toy, a hug, a sweater, make memories that last all year.”
“Yes, giving is fine,” Logan insisted. “I’m not denying that. But people these days just want, and forget to even tip their hat!”
He indicated Rarity and Fluttershy as they came onstage. Fluttershy tentatively offered out a laurel wreath, only for Rarity to tip her head up and walk off. Fluttershy looked down, her mane hiding her face from the audience.
“This place has forgotten,” Logan concluded. “The true meaning of the holiday. So, I’m going to take it back, and make them see how they’ve lost their way.”
Logan turned his back on Pinkie, who scooted back behind the curtain while he continued his destruction of the stage.
“And so, turning his back on the mare,” Spike narrated. “The Wolf continued his spree; the town was soon laid bare.”
Logan shoved his horde to the very front of the stage, threatening to tip it into the audience.
“And ten thousand feet up,” Spike claimed. “Before the sun could be lit. He rode with his load to the nearest gorge… to dump it.”
Just before Logan could shove the Christmas themed presents off the stage… Twilight arrived.
“Halt!” she yelled.
“Cried a final, desperate voice,” Spike narrated. “To give the wolf one chance to change his foul choice.”
Logan spun, glowering at Twilight.
“You’re a monster, Sir Wolf,” Twilight declared. “Your heart’s an empty hole! Your brain is full of spiders, you have garlic in your soul!”
“Silence your blubbering,” Logan snapped back. “And stay out of my way. You may have ruined Christmas, but the time has come to pay!”
Twilight flared her wings. “We have not ruined Christmas,” she declared. “We won’t stop days’ fun and free. The future you aim to cause, will make a path not meant to be.”
Logan tilted his head, before Twilight’s horn glowed.
“The future should be filled with magic; dreams and wishes brought to life,” Twilight insisted. As she spoke, her horn glowed ice blue, and a horse-like spirit rose. “But you’re attempt to fix Christmas, will only bring tragic strife.”
The ice horse shot towards Logan, barreling him onto his back. Of course, he knew it was just a special effect, simulating what the ponies called ‘Windigos,’ but it still made him jump a bit to see a supposed ice horse launching at him.
“Impossible,” he insisted. “I’m making them remember.”
“By joining in hate,” Twilight countered. “And killing hope’s ember.”
The ice horse hit Logan again, but he maintained his footing.
“Good intentions, you may bear,” Twilight admitted. “And noble is your goal. But in order to achieve, you join others in malice’s hole. And when even the good-hearted, have only hate and anger to share, the future will truly become a cold nightmare.” She lifted her horn, and the ice horse cantered up into the sky, spinning before exploding into snow.
Logan looked back at the gifts, making sure the audience saw his expression of conflict.
“The final pony spoke truth,” Spike narrated. “And paw deep in the snow. The Wolf puzzled and pondered.”
“How can it be so?” Logan wondered. “Christmas seems just about ribbons. It feels just about tags; it’s all about packages, boxes and bags!”
“You can puzzle and ponder until your puzzler is sore,” Twilight replied. “But think of something you haven’t before.” She stepped forward. “Christmas may feel, like it just comes from a store. But maybe, Christmas, perhaps, could still mean a little bit more.”
Logan sighed, and turned back to his horde.
“And what happened then?” Spike asked. “Well, in Equestria, they say… the Wolf’s cold heart thawed just a bit that day.”
Logan spat a raspberry at Spike, but he dragged the gifts back to the center of the stage, as the cast re-converged before him.
“And with more to ponder, and his fur less uptight,” Spike continued. “He returned with his horde, to the bright morning light.”
However, Logan stood resolutely between his horde and the ponies, shooting them, and especially Rarity, a suspicious glare.
“Before I bring back these toys,” Logan said. “To the good girls and boys. I ask that you remember, those that help bring these joys.” He nodded at Fluttershy. “Remember employees, that package and send. Remember their pain, let their silent suffering end. For Christmas and Hearth’s Warming can’t be without work. So, be kind to those workers, and try not to be a jerk.”
The ponies gave a harsh look at Rarity, who had been representing the greedy and depraved. She bowed her head and backed up behind the curtain. Logan gave a slight nod, and nudged the gifts back to them.
“And so, on this night of Christmas,” Spike concluded. “A compromise was reached. The wolf’s message was received, his worries beseeched. Whether it be Christmas or Hearth’s Warming, don’t be unkind. Remember your hard-working fellows, and pay them great mind.”
“Welcome Christmas,” Logan said alongside him. “Bring its cheer. Cheer to all those, far and near.”
“The Spirit of giving is in our grasp,” Carol added. “So, long as we reach out to clasp.”
“Welcome Christmas, while together we stand,” Pinkie added as she bounced up next to them.”
“Heart to heart,” Twilight concluded, striding up beside them. “And hoof in hand.”
And as the final stretch of music played its last crescendo, the audience rose up, stamping their hooves and whistling in glee. The cast members gave their bows, before Logan noticed people throwing flowers onto the stage. As the curtain began to close, Logan spotted Celestia again, tossing a bouquet of roses towards him. Her smile was more joyful than Logan had ever seen.
Logan’s smile grew mischievous, and his eyes flashed. A small flicker of light, easily mistakable for the glare of one of the spotlights, zipped through the air and batted her bouquet higher into the air.
nd just before the curtains closed, Logan watched with glee as the bouquet flipped through the air and landed – perfectly – right onto Celestia’s horn.
“Oh!” the alicorn yelped in shock.
“LOGAN!” Twilight’s voice was muffled by the curtain, but it couldn’t drown out Logan’s laugh. Just because it was Hearth’s Warming didn’t mean that he couldn’t still have some fun with the Princesses.