//------------------------------// // Of Potties and Parties (Lil' Cheese) // Story: Potty Training Tales // by SuperPinkBrony12 //------------------------------// Much like his parents before him, Lil’ Cheese was a bundle of seemingly limitless energy. The kind of kid who never seemed to want to hold still for anything, every moment could be spent doing something fun. Especially with his parents, who loved to spoil him sweet (figuratively and literally). At first both Pinkie Pie and Cheese Sandwich hadn’t been bothered in spite of the odd looks they got from other parents. It took a party pony to understand how to raise a future party pony, and if the not so occasional treat kept Lil’ Cheese happy and content what harm was there? They made sure to set boundaries, and they had lots of help from Pinkie’s friends if worse came to worse. The only real problem was finding a suitable foalsitter on a permanent basis. Lil’ Cheese needed somepony who had a sense of humor and understood how he worked. Not many ponies could fill that role easily. However, as Lil’ Cheese grew older his parents began to grow worried about a detail that all parents inevitably both long for and dread at the same time: Potty training. They held off on it for longer than they probably should’ve, a fact that did not go unnoticed by others. Lil’ Cheese was turning three in a couple of weeks, yet he remained in diapers and had not appeared to even start potty training even just a little. The concerned parents knew they had to at least make an effort to get Lil’ Cheese interested in the potty. But considering how much the little colt liked to bounce and play, considering how hard it was to get him to stand still, the task of trying to potty train him was easier said than done. So it was that one evening, Pinkie was getting Lil’ Cheese ready for bed, and changing his diaper. Her years of experience with the Cake Twins had prepared her well and she hadn’t lost her touch. Heck, she’d had to teach her husband how to change diapers after his first attempt had ended with him getting a diaper on his head and another on his rump (which had caused Pinkie to giggle, as it brought back memories of the first time she’d tried to change diapers). Lil’ Cheese giggled and wiggled about as the wet wipes made contact with his flanks. He thought it was funny but his mother just found it tiring. “Come on, Lil’ Cheese. I need to get you cleaned up and I can’t do that if you keep wiggling around.” She pleaded with her son. “Sorry, Mommy, but the wipes tickle!” Lil’ Cheese giggled. “I know they tickle, but if you don’t hold still I can’t clean you up right and you’ll get a rash,” Pinkie protested. “I’m almost done, but I need you to hold still for me, okay?” Lil’ Cheese gave a small salute. “Okay, Mommy. I be good.” He occupied himself by putting some of his poofy mane into his mouth, for some reason it tasted kind of like cotton candy. Most likely he got it from his mom since her mane tasted just as sweet. Pinkie Pie was just glad to have something else occupying her son’s attention, it gave her a chance to finish the wiping job and put a new diaper on him. Once the diaper change was complete, she washed her hooves and then helped Lil’ Cheese off the changing table. Quick as a flash she lowered him into his crib and kissed him lovingly on the forehead. “Goodnight, Lil’ Cheese. Sweet dreams.” And only once she was certain that Lil’ Cheese was asleep did the pink party pony slip out of the nursery. She and Cheese Sandwich still lived in Sugarcube Corner, there really was no place like it for Pinkie. Cheese Sandwich was waiting for his wife when she exited the nursery. “Hey there, honey. How’s the little one?” Pinkie let out a sigh, something that she rarely did even around her husband. “Fine, but he’s still as jumpy as ever.” Cheese tried his best to smile. “Well that is to be expected considering who his parents are.” “I know,” Pinkie replied with a slight frown. “But that means it’s going to be difficult to get him potty trained. And we have to do it, we’re running out of excuses.” “Are you sure we can’t hold off for just a little bit longer?” Cheese suggested. “You said it yourself, it’s not good if we try to rush or force him into it. We want the whole thing to be fun and enjoyable for him, not something he dreads.” Pinkie shook her head. “We’ve been putting it off for long enough, Cheese. Even his best friend Big Sugar is in potty training, and his parents are training him the old fashioned way. At this rate, if we don’t start potty training him now, he’ll be the only colt in kindergarten who still wears diapers.” Now it was Cheese Sandwich’s turn to frown. “I was afraid you would say that, Pinkie. But you’re right, we have to do this,” He and his wife began trotting downstairs to make a plan. “You’re the expert, dear. You’ve been down this road with the twins when they were growing up.” “That was more Mr. and Mrs. Cake’s doing, I just assisted as necessary,” The pink party pony insisted. “And I really don’t wanna have to rely on them again. They deserve to enjoy their retirement.” Cheese pondered. “What about Pound and Pumpkin? I’m sure they could find a way to help, you know how much he looks up to them.” “I’ve already tried that. We tried to start potty training Lil’ Cheese last weekend while you were out of town,” Pinkie confessed. “He wouldn’t go anywhere near the potty, not even after we showed him how to flush it." She then started to recall that very moment on that very day as if it happened yesterday. Pinkie Pie was about to use the bathroom when she saw Lil’ Cheese playing with his toys. Suddenly, she got an idea and went over to him. “Lil’ Cheese, today I'm going to teach you something that is not only fun, but also very important for ponies your age.” She told him as she picked him up off the floor and carried him into the bathroom. Lil' Cheese gasped! “What ya going to teach me, Mommy?” He asked. After closing the door, Pinkie Pie placed her son onto the bathroom floor and said, “Me and your daddy have decided that it’s to teach you about the potty,” She pointed a hoof towards the toilet and added. “And I'm going to show you how to use it.” Lil’ Cheese eyed the toilet. “How using the potty fun?” He protested. “I'll show you,” Pinkie told him. “When you do need to go, first me or Daddy will take off your diaper off. Once you're placed on the seat of the potty, just sit down like this,” She paused so she could sit down onto the toilet seat. “And then you just do what you normally do in your diaper. Now, just give me a minute or two.” Lil’ Cheese nodded “Take all the time you need, Mommy,” He declared and turned his head. “I hope the part that's fun come soon.” After waiting for about a minute or so, he could hear a few plops and splashes as Pinkie Pie sighed with relief. “Okay, now once you're all done, you just clean yourself up with some toilet paper,” She pulled a few pieces off from the roll nearby and did what she told him before dumping it into the toilet. “And now comes the fun part!” She added. "You flush the potty. It's always fun to do that!”  “How you flush potty?” Lil’ Cheese asked, bouncing up and down with a smile on his face. “See that handle over there?” Pinkie Pie told him, pointing a hoof at a silver handle on the upper left side of the toilet tank. “You just push it down like this.” She then placed a hoof on the handle and pushed it down. "FWOOSH!" The toilet roared loudly as the flush began! The toilet was flushing very loudly, too loud for Lil’ Cheese! “MONSTER!” He screamed as ran towards Pinkie Pie and grabbed one of her hooves. “Mamma Mia!” She thought to herself as her son started to cry. “Here I go again!” “Hey, Pinkie?” Cheese Sandwich asked, just as his wife had returned to reality. “This might sound silly but when you were a filly, what was your favorite part about being potty trained?” “To me, flushing is and will always the very best part,” Pinkie replied to her husband. “And I remember how much fun the twins had with flushing.” “Yeah, flushing was always the best part for me too,” Cheese Sandwich replied, briefly growing nostalgic. “So, what are we going to do if even that doesn’t work?” “I don’t know, and I’m running out of ideas! We could really use a miracle right about now!” Pinkie declared with a groan. As if the very universe had heard the party pony’s proclamation of woe, at that very moment her wandering blue eyes happened upon a flyer that she could’ve sworn hadn’t been there before. Picking up, she read it aloud: “Nanny De’Foal: Foalsitting Problems Magically Disappear”. She scanned over said flyer once, then twice, then a third time. According to said flyer, the nanny was a mare who prided herself on being able to solve any sort of foalsitting issues that parents were struggling with: potty training chief among them. Cheese smiled as he looked at his wife. “Looks like we’ve found our miracle. Guess we write De’Foal a letter requesting her services.” But there was no need to do so, for at that very moment there came a gust of wind and in a cloud of what looked like foal powder: A plump earth pony mare appeared before the parents. Said mare had a baby blue coat and bright orange eyes, her mane and tail were also orange with her mane done up in a bun. Her tail was obscured by a cowl that was white with red polka dots, and she had a red saddlebag strapped over her right side which just so happened to match her cutie mark (just like the cutie mark, the saddlebag was all but overflowing with foal supplies). “You are ze parents of Lil’ Cheese: Mr. Cheeze Sandvich Pie and Mrs. Pinkie Diane Pie, correct?” Both party ponies nodded and exchanged glances. “How did you-” They began. “Zere is no need to ask, I have my methods,” The mare replied with a wink. “You may call me Nanny De’Foal. And it iz my underztanding zat ze two of you have need of my zervices, correct?” Pinkie nodded again as she approached Nanny De’Foal. “Oh yes, we certainly do. Your flyer says you can help us with potty training?” Nanny De’Foal nodded back. “Zat is an area I am quite skilled in. My methods are quite magical, but I have never met a colt or filly yet zat that I could not help train,” She promptly questioned the parents. “Vat zeems to be ze problem?” “Well, Lil’ Cheese is almost three years old now, but we haven’t really been able to start potty training him,” Cheese Sandwich confessed to Nanny De’Foal. “I mean, my wife tried a little, but he just didn’t take to it. We really want to make the experience enjoyable and… well… fun for him, like we make everything fun.” De’Foal stroked her chin with a hoof as she took in this information. “I zee. Vell, zat is a most unusual dilemma. I can see zat my usual methods vill not work here. Most of ze time I find that ze parents do not know how to communicate the process to their little one on a level they will understand, because they themzelves have forgotten what it iz like to be a foal,” Then she explained further. “But you two zeem to have ze opposite problem. You are very much big kids yourzelves.” “Guilty as charged, though my wife is more the big kid than I am. But that’s just what I like about her.” Cheese Sandwich cooed as he nuzzled his wife. Pinkie blushed and waved a hoof. “Stop it, Cheese. Now’s not the time to get all romantic, this is serious.” “I agree, potty training iz nothing to sneeze at,” De’Foal firmly replied. “If ze child has a bad experience with it, it can have grave consequences for zem growing up. Wanting to ensure that it iz fun is zometing many parents do not consider. However, you fear zat if you make it too fun Lil’Cheese vill not understand vhy it is so important.” The smile on Pinkie Pie’s face faded once again. “Yeah, that’s pretty much the case. But you can help us, right Nanny De’Foal?” The plump earth pony mare didn’t answer right away, she was silent for about a moment or two. Both parents began to silently worry that theirs was a problem that even this magical nanny couldn’t solve. But their fears were cleared up when De’Foal informed them both. “Fear not. I know of a vay zat will make the process memorable and enjoyable for Lil’ Cheese, vile ensuring zat ze child understands vhy it is important to use the potty.” “How are you gonna do that?” Cheese Sandwich questioned. “Vith a little of zis!” De’Foal declared as she pulled out a glowing dot from her saddle bag. “Zome chaos magic borrowed from Discord’s realm.” Even Pinkie seemed to be hesitant about such magic. “What are you gonna do with it? Nothing permanent, right?” De’Foal nodded. “Of course not. Now, here is vat we are going to do.” Leaning close, she whispered her plan into the ears of both parents. When Lil’ Cheese woke up the next morning, he had no idea of the incredible surprise that lay in store for him. All he knew was that when he woke up, his mommy and daddy were standing over his crib alongside a pony he had never seen before. A plump, baby blue coated earth pony mare with bright orange eyes, and a similarly colored mane and tail. “Hello, Lil’ Cheese,” Nanny De’Foal greeted. “I am Nanny De’Foal, a friend of your mommy and daddy. Zey have hired me to help you with zometing zat is very important for a little one your age. How to use ze potty.” Lil’ Cheese just giggled as he stood up in his crib. “Mommy and Uncle Pound and Auntie Pumpkin already try to teach me about potty. I no wanna use it, it no fun.” De’Foal was not deterred by the little one’s statement, she just shook her head. “Oh, but ze potty is fun. And didn’t you know zat it is lonely?” “Potty get lonely?” Lil’ Cheese pondered, apparently never having considered such a thing before. De’Foal nodded as she, Pinkie Pie and Cheese Sandwich all appeared to be trying hard not to giggle. “Oh yes, ven you don’t use it gets very lonely. Ze potty loves to make new friends, and it is very sad because you don’t want to be its friend.” But the little colt, suspecting nothing, protested. “I wanna be potty’s friend. I like to make new friends too!” “Zen you must come with me and your mommy and daddy,” De’Foal encouraged. “We vill show you how you can befriend ze potty.” Lil’ Cheese was so excited he could hardly stand still as he was picked up by his mommy and set down on the ground. With a spring in his step he followed his parents and their new friend as they led him down the hall to the bathroom. De’Foal pushed open the door to said bathroom a moment later, and Lil’ Cheese could hardly believe his eyes! The entire bathroom had been transformed from a place of drab looking tiles, boring cabinets, and dull looking objects a pale white in color, to a world that was nothing like anything the little colt had ever seen before. The tub had turned into a stream, with giant, sentient rubber duckies swimming around in it and passing by brightly colored toy boats that sounded like real ships. The sink now resembled two waterfalls, one with steam flowing over it to symbolize how hot it was, and the other with ice beneath it to symbolize how cold it was. Several of those strange bottles from underneath the sink were now flying and singing, listing off ingreidents that Lil’ Cheese had never heard before. But what attracted the most attention was by far the potty, the big grown-up one that Lil’ Cheese knew many ponies his age and older used. It now had two big eyes beneath its tank, which had transformed to look like hair curls. Two arms rested on either side of its bowl that now looked more like a belly, complete with a smile. And it seemed to have two legs near its s-bend. At once it locked eyes with Lil’ Cheese and spoke. “Oh, hello. I remember you.” Lil’ Cheese blinked as his parents giggled ever so faintly. “Ya do?” The potty nodded as it stood up on its legs and stretched out its arms. “Of course, you’re Lil’ Cheese. I’m Mr. Potty, nice to meet you.” Lil’ Cheese blinked again as “Mr. Potty” offered an arm to the little one, clearly intending for him to shake it. “N-nice to meet you, Mr. Potty,” The little colt greeted as he shook the arm. “Ya want to be my friend?” “Mr. Potty” nodded. “Oh of course I do. I can never have enough friends. Especially since they give me what I want.” “You mean…” Lil’ Cheese began. “Mr. Potty” flashed his smile. “-Yes, what you’re used to doing in your diapers. You see, all big ponies use me eventually. And you want to be a big pony, don’t you?” “Yeah, big ponies get to do big pony things!” Lil’ Cheese smiled. “What I gotta do?” “Well, you can start by taking a seat on me,” “Mr. Potty” encouraged. “Then you just relax and do what you need to do.” But Lil’ Cheese stepped back a bit, gulping ever so slightly. “But what if I fall in? Everything that goes in your belly never comes out. Would ya eat me?” “Mr. Potty” chuckled, his bowl like belly shaking. “I would never eat one of my friends, not even if I could. And I can’t, I have a very strict diet. Besides the obvious, I can only eat toilet paper. If you try to feed me anything else I’ll get sick. And when I get sick, I try to cough up whatever isn’t good for me. Sometimes if I’m really sick, I have to have a special kind of pony come and take care of me.” “Potties have doctors?” Lil’ Cheese pondered. “Plumbers, actually,” Pinkie Pie explained. “And they’re doctors for more than just potties.” Cheese Sandwich added. “But Mr. Potty doesn’t need a doctor, he’s perfectly fine. He needs you, and there’s only one thing he needs from you.” “Your mommy and daddy are right, Lil’ Cheese,” “Mr. Potty” chimed in. “So, can you help me out here: One friend to another? I’ll even let you pull my handle when you’re all done, it always tickles when ponies touch my handle.” The little colt nodded ever so slowly. He wasn’t quite as afraid now, but he was still unsure about this entire process. To be expected to do what he was used to doing in his diapers felt strange and alien to him. Still, it was what his parents, De’Foal, and “Mr. Potty” expected of him. So it was at least worth a try, right? “Mr. Potty” scooped Lil’ Cheese up with his arms and carefully removed his diaper. “Make sure to ask a grown-up to help you with your diaper before you sit on me,” He cautioned the little colt. “Otherwise you’ll just end up using it instead of me. And you don’t want that.” Lil’ Cheese was then placed on the seat as his parents smiled before turning their heads, De’Foal doing the same so as to give the little one privacy. “Go ahead, then,” “Mr. Potty” encouraged. “Do what you have to do, Lil’ Cheese.” Surprisingly, the little colt found it easier than he thought it would be to go into the potty and not his diapers. A series of plops and splashes reached his ears, and the smell left little doubts as to what he’d done. Both Pinkie and Cheese were very proud, if the bright smiles and constant clapping were anything to go by. “Great job, Lil’ Cheese! That’s how big ponies go potty!” Nanny De’Foal simply added. “Now zat you know vat you must do, I hope you vill do make an effort to continue your potty training. And here,” She trotted over, pulling some paper like substance off a nearby roll. “Zis is toilet paper, it is vat you use to clean yourself up venever you go potty. It vorks just like the wipes your parents used when you still needed diapers.” Lil’ Cheese did as instructed, wiping himself clean as best he could and then tossing the used rolls down into the bowl. “Now I flush?” He asked. Everyone nodded, including “Mr. Potty”. “Of course,” He gestured to the gleaming silver handle underneath his right eye. “Simply push that down and you will feed me.” Lil’ Cheese tried to reach the handle, but it was hard with his little hooves. Fortunately, after a couple of jumps and a big bounce, he was just barely able to grab it. And then using all of his earth pony strength that he had in his body, he pulled the handle down with all of his might. FWOOSH! A mighty roar rang out as as the water inside “Mr. Potty”’s bowl like belly started to spin around and around, taking everything inside with it. The little colt watched with amazement as as the water spun faster and faster, turning into a mighty whirlpool. And then suddenly, it all got sucked down a hole at the bottom and disappeared into “Mr. Potty”’s belly. And when the water inside "Mr. Potty" returned and refilled back up to it’s normal level, it was crystal clear again as if Lil’ Cheese had never used "Mr. Potty" in the first place. “Mr. Potty” smiled and gave a hearty burp. “Thank you, Lil’ Cheese. I’m glad we got to know each other, and I hope we’ll be seeing each other quite often from now on.” Cheese Sandwich then said to his son, “Now Lil’ Cheese, do you promise to-.” He was interrupted when Pinkie Pie whispered into his ear. “I mean ‘Pinkie Promise' us to be a big pony and start using the potty?" Lil’ Cheese nodded. “Uh-huh, I ‘Pinkie Promise’ to come to you whenever I have to go,” He then repeated the motion. “Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!” He took great care not to jab himself in the eye with a hoof by mistake. Pinkie helped Lil’ Cheese down and brought him over to the sink to wash his hooves (she did the same, just to be safe). “See? Wasn’t that fun, Lil’ Cheese?” She asked her son. Lil’ Cheese nodded. “Uh-huh, it was the bestest thing ever! I can’t wait to visit Mr. Potty again!” Cheese Sandwich just giggled. “Well that will have to wait until your next potty time, Lil’ Cheese. And from now on, be sure to tell either me or your mommy if you have to go. We’ll be sure to keep track of your progress with a potty chart, every successful trip gets you a gold star.” “And do you know what this calls for?!” Pinkie excitedly asked. Without waiting for a reply she answered. “A party! I’m gonna call all your friends, Lil’ Cheese! We’ll even bake a cake for your potty party!” “I hope you’ll stay for the party, Nanny De’Foal,” Cheese Sandwich offered. “And you can just name your price.” Nanny De’Foal just grinned and gave a wink. “Simply zave me a slice of cake and we’ll be good. I zhall stay for as long as Lil’ Cheese needs me.” “And ‘Mr. Potty’?” Cheese questioned. “Do not worry, zis magical bathroom zhall only appear whenever Lil’ Cheese enters it,” De’Foal declared. “Though if Discord asks, I know nothing about ze missing chaos magic.” Cheese just pondered. “You know, I get the funny feeling I’ve seen you before, De’Foal.” De’Foal simply winked. “Perhaps I foalsat and potty trained you ven you were Lil’ Cheese’s age. My methods are a mystery to everyone but myself.”