Down with Chrysalis’s Comment
The Pony Spartan’s Comment
Twilight, dressed as the Masked Matterhorn blinks owlishly at you before shaking her head.
“This…this isn’t making any sense! Is this Nightmare Moon’s doing? Is she trapping us in a horrifying dreamscape?! Are you a member of The Horde?! What’s going on?!” she starts to hyperventilate.
“Twilight, Twilight, calm down!” Spike advises and she looks between him and Garble.
“And what’s going on with red and purple Spike being here at the same time?! What sorcery is this?! Nightmare Moon! Show Yourself!” she shrieks as she whips her head back and forth.
“Oh boy, the mare’s lost it,” Grandbuggy deadpans.
“Ms. Twilight! Quit pulling a Twilight! This isn’t Mo-Er-Nightmare Moon’s doing! And-“
“Aha! I figured it out! Nightshade is now the host to Nightmare Moon and became the new Hooded Offender! You Devious Monster!” she says glaring at you and you scoff.
“Oh for buck’s sake, really?!”
“Twilight, that makes no sense,” Spike points out trying to calm her down.
“Neither does being in a strangely colored city wearing embarrassing skintight spandex with a bunch of random creatures and my baby dragon split in half!” she shrieks as she starts advancing on you with a crazy look in her eye.
“Uh, Ms. Twilight?” you ask hesitantly as she advances.
“Shade, I don’t like that look in her eyes,” Greta warns.
“Yeah, hey Purple Pony, maybe you should calm down?” Garble calls out.
“Silence Red Spike! Now’s the time for action! Now’s the time to stop Nightmare Moon after she did whatever she did to make you two dragons and dress me up without my consent!”
“I think that pony really needs some sleep or something,” Ember says to Grandbuggy.
“No Spit,” he snarks as Twilight gets in your shrouded face.
“Now! You Fix Spike and release us from this…whatever it is before-“
“Oh put a sock in it!” you growl as your shards glow and suddenly…
“YEAGH!” Twilight yelps as she is slapped away from you and onto Garble.
“Oomph!” Garble grunts as she lands on him.
“What the…?” you say as you look to the side and your eyes shrink to pinpricks. “How the Buck?!”
“Nightshade?” Spike gasps in astonishment and your blood runs cold as your breathing gets heavier. Whipping around you menacingly are your Mom and Dad’s Nightmare Tails.
“Wha…I…Huh?” you gape as the tendrils twist around you.
“Oh cool, since when could she do that?” asks Ember.
“She can’t, that’s…” Grandbuggy trails off.
“Oh, I’m sorry Red Spike,” Twilight says as she gets off of him and glares back at you. “But I knew it! How dare you possess a sweet little filly like Nightshade?!”
“Twilight! She’s not possessed! And I’m the real Spike!” the real Spike growls in frustration.
“Maybe you are, but look at the proof Purple Spike! She’s got the tails! With Tennant gone, Nightmare Moon must have gotten to her. Maybe because her coloring is similar to that alicorn filly she was chosen? But we have to stop her!” she says as she starts to build magic up in her horn.
“Twilight Stop!” Spike yells as he jumps on her back.
“Yeah! That’s my rival!” Garble agrees as she grabs her leg.
“SKREONK!” Mangle barks as she grabs onto her tail.
“Hey! Let me go-“
“Lady, you need to take a fiver and just think for a moment!” Greta commands as she gets her in a chokehold.
“Get off! I have to stop Nightmare Moon before-“
“Calm Down! Get A Hold Of Yourself!” Ember shrieks before slapping Twilight hard in the face which makes her eyes roll. Everyone in the dog pile look at her in shock and she backs up sheepishly. “What? I had to stop her from screaming didn’t I?”
Once she’s able to focus her eyes somewhat, Twilight begins to struggle again, and they dogpile her even more in earnest.
You meanwhile, are only faintly paying attention to this as you stare at the tails in shock.
But…I…I never wanted the tails…you think in devastation as you will them to move and they do. The tails carry with them some pretty bad memories for you, and they’ve never really been your cup of tea. Sure that last time in Appleloosa when he reached his awakened form after you convinced Sombra to help was a turning point for you, but the bad memories still remain.
Like the beatdown after the Ursa Major, the Grand Gallopoing Gala, that time when Aqua almost got drowned, and of course, the Crystal Empire rampage, and those were only the ones you were present for. The stories about Fillydelphia and the Otherworld still make you shiver in dread, and the tails are a symbol of how truly bucked your life has been. Any time they’ve come out, any stability you’ve had goes right out the window.
And now you have them too.
“Get! Off!” Twilight commands as she sends a sphere of magic outward that catches everyling in it’s web, causing them to hover.
“Oh, I don’t like this! This feels weird!” Ember whines as she floats uncontrollably in the magic grasp.
“I’ll deal with you all later after I…I….” Twilight trails off as she looks at you and becomes very confused.
“Buck! Mother Buck! Spit! Flankhole! Bucking Gorramned Bitch Nugget Supreme! WHAT THE BUCK?!” you curse to the heavens, with your shards glowing underneath your cloak and your tails whipping about.
“Whoa kid, language,” Greta scolds but you ignore her as you continue running around like a chicken with your head cut off.
“Seriously! Buck You Lady Luck! Buck You To Tartarus!” you curse as you slam your hooves into the ground, creating a small crater. “GRRRRAAAAAGGGGHHHH!!!”
After screaming for almost a straight minute with a very intrigued audience, you slump in the crater you created and pant.
Why can’t I just have a normal life? You think in melancholy as a pair of hooves stop at the edge of your crater.
“You done?” Grandbuggy asks, almost sounding bored. You give a tired sigh and nod silently.
“Good,” he says as he reaches a hoof out to you and you take it. “We all need a good yell once in awhile kiddo. Better out than in,” he says sagely as he pats your back.
“Thanks Grandbuggy…I just…I don’t want to have these tails,” you admit and he nods.
“Figured as much. Who would?” he shrugs. “But don’t get too worked up. Whatever the buck is going on here, I don’t think it’s permanent…at least I hope it isn’t.”
You look at him with his sparkly eyes and androgynous looking pony features wearing a sparkly leotard and you can’t help but feel his wisdom is diminished somewhat.
“Thanks Grandbuggy…but can you please change into something less anime looking?”
“I would if I could Shade,” he says as he closes his eyes trying to transform and fails. “Whatever’s going on here, I guess calls for me being a pretty boy.”
“It’s unsettling,” you grimace as you look to the others…who are calmly, and collectively talking to Twilight.
“Soooo, this isn’t Spike?” she asks gesturing to Garble and the real Spike faceclaws.
“That’s right,” Greta nods. “It’s Princess Ember’s little brother.”
“Say what now?” Garble guffaws in confusion and Ember smacks him on the back of the head.
“Not by choice,” she grumbles.
“Oh…so you’re all friends of Nightshade and we accidentally had a switcheroo in the castle…why were you there again?” she asks.
“…Honestly, I have no idea,” Greta shrugs.
“Oh…okay then. So whatever this is isn’t Nightmare Moon’s doing,” she says calmly.
“Yes! That’s what I’ve been trying to say from the beginning Twilight!” Spike harrumphs and she looks at him apologetically.
“I’m sorry Spike…” she says as she hugs him and looks to you and Grandbuggy. “And I’m sorry for earlier Nightshade I…Things have been hectic on my side as of late and I guess I just jumped to conclusions. Please forgive me.”
You look at Grandbuggy and back to her and sigh.
“It’s okay, it happens to the best of us,” you placate which actually gets her to smile. The smile fades somewhat though as she turns back Garble.
“Alright Mister, you may be dragon royalty, but that doesn’t excuse the fact that you took advantage of my hospitality!”
“Hey, hey! I didn’t know what was going on!” he defends with raised claws. “And seriously, I woke up, you were pampering me and giving me gems and comic books, how could I say no to that?”
“You gave him my Gems?!” Spike shouts in outrage and Twilight chuckles sheepishly.
“Look, we can all beat on him like a piñata later, but for right now, let’s figure out what’s going on,” Greta interrupts before Spike can throttle the red dragon.
“Good idea catbird,” Grandbuggy says as he walks up to the group and Twilight looks at him curiously.
“Uh…”
“Quick Fix,” he introduces. “I met you a few days ago. I’m dating Granny Smith, and Nightshade’s my Great Grand Daughter?”
“Uh…Yeah I think I heard something about that, but you look…” she trails off and he sighs.
“I know, and I don’t get it either,” he shrugs.
“Yeah, so why are we dressed like superheroes, why is Grandbuggy a Neighponese Pop Star, and why am I Da-Er-The Offender?” you ask aloud.
“I don’t…I don’t know,” Twilight shrugs. “I ran upstairs when Spike…or rather Garble started screaming and…Wait, are you related to that teen dragon who The Hooded Offender fought?”
“…Nope,” he lies with darting eyes.
“Huh…” she accepts this and shakes her head. “But anyway, I went upstairs and he was being sucked into some sort of portal, and I tried to help.
“Oh yeah, I forgot about that after waking up as a masochist’s dream gal,” Greta says looking over her outfit.
“Oh, so this is HIS fault?!” you grumble and give a pointed look at Garble who sweats nervously.
“Well hey now-“
“What did you do?” you demand as everyone glares at him.
“Okay, look I’m going to be perfectly honest-“
“What…Did You Do?” you ask again with barely restrained rage and he gulps.
“Now…I was minding my own business-“
“Bullspit!”
“I Was!” he whines and Ember gets at eye level with him.
“So what happened while you were ‘Minding Your Own Business’ huh?”
“Okay, okay, look…I was sitting in that basket bed, eating a few sapphires,” he starts.
“I was saving those!” Spike shouts.
“And I picked up a comic book like I’d done with the rest…and then that portal to Tartarus opened.”
Everyone looks incredulously at him after he finishes the explanation.
“And that’s it,” he reaffirms.
“You’ve gotta be kidding me, are you saying we got sucked into a danged comic book?” Grandbuggy grumbles.
“…Yes, I think so,” he nods.
“Wait, we got Isekaied? Then how come only Grandbuggy looks Neighsan?” you ask.
“Spike! Is this why you read so many comics? Does this normally happen?” she asks and Spike gives her a deadpanned look.
“No Twilight, this doesn’t happen normally.”
“Oh, then what could it mean then?”
“Magic bullspit probably,” Greta shrugs.
“Probably some nerd’s sick twisted fantasy pocket dimension more like,” Grandbuggy grumbles.
And while everyone ponders this mystery, you start to get a horrible feeling, but you can’t place your hoof on why. Like for starters, since when did Daddy get a tie in with the Power Ponies?
I know I would have bought that comic if it came out. I mean, the only times The Offender was in a comic was from whoever drew them in Arkhay, you ponder before a horrible idea comes to you. What if this is a propaganda comic?
WARGAMES’s Comment
You’ve seen plenty of articles in magazines and newspapers deriding your Daddy and now your Mommy, and on top of being mostly inaccurate, they are always full of hate and assumptions.
This is probably a comic where Dad shows up, commanded by Mommy or some other such nonsense, to attack a city and the Power Ponies show up to stop him. I mean, in real life Daddy would probably wipe the floor with them in awakened state, but if this is propaganda, he’d be weak and bloodthirsty with horrible writing!
You look around at all the other characters that have been filled, and how they all came out from inside of buildings and out of alleys and trashcans and such.
We might have just been flung right into a fight scene!
You then look at your image in a window and see that the art style is crisp and clean, so whoever drew this wasn’t going too hammy.
Now the question is, is this before or after the world found out about Mommy? Because I swear if a ghost form of her shows up telling me to kill everyone like a Death Notebook ripoff, I’m going to kick the writer’s nads into his throat!
You then glare back at Garble and realize, he’s the only one who would know for sure.
Kichi’s Comment
Changer T Emerald’s Comment
“My money’s on that stupid Draconequs being behind this,” Grandbuggy grumbles as you focus back on the conversation.
“Discord?” Twilight before she rubs her chin. “You know, I wouldn’t put it past him. Spike, did you ever get any comics from him?”
“No,” Spike says resolutely. “I’m not Fluttershy so he doesn’t hang out with me, and I don’t see us being bros any time soon.
A feeling of irony washes over you at that, and you don’t know why, but whether Discord caused this or not is irrelevant, and you have a more pressing question.
“Spike,” you whisper and he turns to you.
“I need you to help distract Twilight for a second while I get rough with Garble.”
“Huh? Why?” he asks.
“Because things are still pretty awkward between us and I kind of want to make a better impression you know?”
“Really? I thought you hated her,” he says in surprise and you give him a hurt look.
“I don’t hate her…I’m just cautious around her. She’s close minded, extremely OCD, and wants to kill my Mommy sure, but she was also my teacher for a bit, and I know you love her so she’s not all bad.”
“Right…right…” he says as he rubs the back of his neck. “And I guess good impressions might help for whenever the truth does come out when your dad comes back.”
“Exactly! And I can’t do that if I start strangling a guy in front of her.”
He looks at you in surprise before he smiles evily at that idea.
“Could you slap him around a bit for my stolen gems?”
“Anything for you,” you smirk. “Alright, so here’s the plan. I point behind her and say there’s a three headed monkey, and when she turns, you say you saw it and try to lead her towards it.”
He stares at you in silence for a moment, looking left and right incredulously.
“Really?”
“Yup.”
“…You think she’ll fall for that? Even after all the times your Dad’s pulled the look a distraction ga-“
“Ms. Twilight! Look! A Three Headed Monkey!” you shout pointing behind her.
“What?! Where?!” she whips her head around.
“A what now?!” Greta turns as well.
“The buck’s a monkey?” Ember turns too, as does Garble, Grandbuggy and even Mangle.
“…I stand corrected,” he murmurs to you before shouting. “Oh yup! It crawled into that building!”
“Three headed monkey eh? Definitely Discord then,” Grandbuggy says with vindication. And while they’re all distracted, you turn to Garble, wrap one of your Nightmare Tails around his neck and drag him off into an alley way before the others see.
“Gack! What are you-“ he struggles to say as you pin him to the wall.
"What comic are we in?" you ask in restrained anger as your eye twitches.
Back with the group, Twilight and the others keep looking for the imaginary creature.
“Where? I don’t see it,” Twilight asks as she lifts a cart with her magic.
*POW* The word literally appears in the alleyway surrounded by a cartoony explosive background.
“It, uh, it might have disappeared,” Spike lies.
*BAM* This word also appears but no one but the purple dragon sees.
“That’s weird, I only know a bit about Power Ponies, but I don’t remember an enemy like this,” Greta ponders.
*SMACK*
“I’m telling you, that kooky mish-mashed lizard’s having a laugh at our expense,” Grandbuggy insists.
*WHACK*
“Again, what is a monkey?” Ember asks but no one answers.
*KICK*
“Aaaahh-Oomph!” Garble grunts as he lands back in front of the others.
“And that’s for eating Spike’s gems causing this whole mess,” you say authoritatively as you land in front of him while he groans.
“Huh? Did you say something Nightshade?” asks Twilight as she turns back around and Spike sighs in relief.
“Yup! I figured out what comic we’re in thanks to Garble,” you announce as you use your magic to pick him up to his feet, while he groans and rubs his stomach.
“Really? Well that’s good to here,” she says as she gives one last glance around. “Hopefully it explains whatever that three headed monkey was.”
“Uh…sure,” you say giving a great big innocent smile to her…which doesn’t seem to work as well as in the past. Grandbuggy leans down and whispers to you.
“If you’re smiling, she can’t see it. Face clouded in shadows remember?”
“Oh, right,” you nod as you try to take your hood down…only for it to not budge.
Of course, you sigh knowing that Lady Luck is laughing at your misery.
“Sooo…what comic are we in?” asks Spike and you turn back to the group.
Down with Chrysalis’s Comment
“Alright, from what I gathered, we’re in a crossover issue where the Power Ponies fight The Hooded Offender, and it’s called, ‘Who’s Fighting Who?’”
“Oh goodness, those comics are still coming out? I thought we stopped that Horde Propaganda,” Twilight sighs and Spike looks to her.
“Yeah, well, I got it at a special comic store run by this weird pony in a cloak and a purple scarf like months ago, I didn’t know it could do this.”
You and the rest of the Outcasts share a knowing look at that.
Yeesh, what CAN’T The Merchant sell? You wonder as Twilight continues.
“Well either way, what are we supposed to do in order to get out?” asks Twilight.
“Hmmm, we could try to follow the story?” Garble suggests as he rubs a bump on his head courtesy of you.
“Huh?” questions Ember.
“You know, follow the story, and do what the characters are supposed to do.”
“How are we supposed to figure that out? Did you read it all the way?” asks Greta.
“No, I kind of got to this scene right here where the Offender encountered the Power Ponies and Nightmare Moon told him to brainwash them into helping.”
“OH COME ON!” you shout in frustration.
“I know right? Mistress Mare-Volous is supposed to be immune to that,” he shakes his head.
“Who?” asks Twilight.
“Mistress Mare-Volous. Who Greta is dressed as,” he points at the griffon.
“You mean this dominatrix suit?”
“She’s not a…whatever that is. Her magic lasso’s help her to ensnare villains,” you chime in.
“What, can they make you tell the truth as well?” Grandbuggy scoffs.
“No, that’s Wonder Mare, different universe entirely,” Spike answers.
“Oh whatever nerdy thing it is, who the buck am I?” he grunts.
“You’re dressed as Radiance, the most beautiful mare on the team,” Spike answers chuckling nervously.
“Ah great, nah, yeah that’s great,” Grandbuggy grumbles sarcastically.
“Believe me, it’s as horrifying for us,” Garble says and gets a stink eye in response.
“As for the rest, Twilight’s the Masked Matterhorn, Ember’s Zapp, I’m Filli-Second, Mangle’s Saddle-Rager for some reason, and Garble’s Hum Drum,” Spike lists off, giving a smirk at the last entry.
“Which totally sucks! He doesn’t have any powers and just gets in the way!” he complains.
“But doesn’t he eventually get his own Teen Superhero team?” you ask and Spike rolls his eyes.
“Not anymore, that line got cancelled and then got made into several shows, some overly serious, and some that were way too goofy.”
“Oh,” your ears wilt at that.
“It was better when he was like a cyborg in the Ultimate Universe,” Garble complains and Spike shoots him a stink eye.
“We don’t talk about the Ultimate Universe! The only good thing to come out of that was the revamped Spider-Mane, but otherwise it sucked!”
“Hey, it had some good storylines,” Garble argues.
“The creator of it turned Saddle-Rager into an unrepentant murderous cannibal! He’s gone on record stating that he’s always hated that she wasn’t always considered a villain and hates her being portrayed as a hero! Buck him and buck the Ultimate Universe!”
“Spike! Language!” Twilight scolds.
“Sorry, sorry,” he apologizes and starts to step back under gaze. “I got carried away and...how did I get here?”
In the blink of an eye, Spike is now thirty feet back from you all, still in that apologetic stance.
“Did you just teleport?” asks Grandbuggy.
“When did you learn that?” you ask in intrigue.
“No no, he ran real fast. He’s Filli-Second after all,” Garble informs. To prove that point, Spike rushes over to your group, leaving an after image as he’s suddenly back in front of you.
“…Huh,” he says as he looks down at his claws.
“That was amazing Spike,” Twilight praises. “You’re still in trouble, but that was amazing!”
“Okay…” Ember interrupts. “I’m still not one hundred percent certain what’s going on here, but like, do we all have super powers now?”
“Oh! That’s why I have the Nightmare Tails!” you say in understanding.
“Cool! What powers do I get?” Ember asks excitedly.
“Uh, Zapp uses her charm to call down lightning and thunder,” Garble informs as she looks at the lightning bolt around her neck.
“Oh Sweet,” she says as it crackles with Static.
“Huh, what can I do?” asks Grandbuggy.
“I think you can do like Green Lantern type stuff right?” you double check and Spike nods.
“Yeah, she can make constructs only limited to her imagination.”
“Ah, so that’s why I got put in this role,” Grandbuggy realizes as he conjures up an image of a mare in a bikini posing.
“Is…is my power just rope?” asks Greta.
“Yeah, but you can control it with your mind,” you say and she still deadpans.
“Oh gee, how exciting…”
“Be grateful you even got a power,” Garble pouts. “The freaking robot can turn into a giant berserker.”
“Skreonk!” Mangle barks.
“She does have some experience with that,” you nod and look back to Twilight who raises her hoof.
“Oh, so what can I do?” she asks.
“Uh, you can make any kind of beam come out of your horn, like ice, fire, and stuff like that,” Spike answers.
“…But I could already do those things,” she points out.
“Yeah, well now you can do them while wearing a costume,” you say unhelpfully.
“Great…” she trails off before looking to Garble.
“So, Prince Garble,” she addresses and you snicker, “With these roles and powers…what are we supposed to do to follow the story?”
Ello Calebero’s Comment
“Uh…fight The Hooded Offender?” he suggests and everyone turns to you.
“Yeah, how about no?” you scoff. “I really don’t feel like fighting right now.”
“But he does have a point, if you’re supposed to be the enemy of the Power Ponies.”
“Yeah, well buck the plot, we can make a better one!” you growl and look to Twilight.
“Hello Masked Matterhorn, I would actually like to be your friend and not fight, if that’s okay with you?”
“Uh…sure?” Twilight guesses. Silence falls over the group as nothing happens.
“Well that didn’t work,” Greta states the obvious.
“Course it didn’t. Comics, at least back in my day, always had awesome fighting,” Grandbuggy points out.
“Soooo, thunderbolt the filly?” Ember asks holding her pendant towards you.
“NO! There’s gotta be a better way!” you yell, not liking the direction everything’s going.
“Hey wait, I just remembered something. The Maneiac was on the cover of this comic as well!” Spike says as he bonks his head and accidentally runs 19 ft in millisecond.
“Okay, okay, that’s getting somewhere, let’s go find and fight her instead of me, huh? Huh?” you suggest and they all look amongst themselves.
“Sounds like as good as a plan as any I guess,” Greta concludes and you sigh in relief.
“I agree, I don’t particularly want to fight a little filly,” Twilight says and chuckles nervously when you give her a pointed look.
“Alright then…so what’s a Maneiac?” asks Grandbuggy.
“Oh, well, she’s a supervillain that has complete control over her hair and can use it to ensnare ponies,” Spike explains. Grandbuggy looks at your friend for a few heartbeats before he shrugs.
“You know, I’d always heard comic villains got more dark and “mature” as the years went by, but that sounds goofy and fun just like the old days,” he says with a smirk.
“You clearly haven’t read The Killing Yoke then,” you shudder. “But anyway…how do we find her?”
Puzzling Frost’s Comment
“Maybe we could follow that symbol in the sky?” Ember suggests pointing up. You all look and silhouetted against the night sky is a spotlight beam, with a shadowy symbol in the center. The initials H.O. surrounded by a crescent moon.
“…Well yeah, obviously we’re gonna follow that,” you say as if it’s obvious.
You all then proceed to follow the bright glowing macguffin through the streets with bright neon colors contrasting against dark shadows.
“You know, cartoon imagery sure doesn’t translate well when it looks realistic,” Spike observes as he looks around.
“I know what you mean,” Twilight nods. “But honestly, I think Pinkie Pie would love it here.”
And while they chat, Garble comes up to you and asks,
“So why is Princess Ember calling me her little brother?”
“Because we had to come up with an excuse and you being fun sized now means it’s more believable,” you grunt and roll your eyes.
“I guess,” he says with slumped shoulders. “But aside from the pampering I got when that pony thought I was Spike, I don’t want to be like this forever.”
“Well maybe you shouldn’t have tried to eat the crystal tree that created the Elements of Harmony then,” Greta scolds and bops him in the back of the head with her rope.
“…Was that supposed to hurt?” he asks sincerely and she bristles.
“I’m still working out this stupid rope power!”
“Hey, look alive everyone, I think we’re almost to that light thing,” Ember warns as you round a corner…
The Pony Spartan’s Comment
WARGAMES’s Comment
“Muhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaa!!!” an insane feminine laugh pierces the air and you all freeze in shock.
“Oh My Gosh, it’s actually her,” you, Spike and Garble all gasp in both awe and fear. For standing upon a deli rooftop next to a giant search light, with her hair whipping around like your tails, is the villainous herself, Maneiac.
“So Hooded Offender, I see you made good on your boast in ensnaring the minds of the puny Power Ponies…” she cackles.
“Oh Come On! That’s the plot of this story?!” you complain as Grandbuggy rolls his eyes.
“Honestly, how often are ponies gonna fall back on that one. The boy was never got that changeling ability,” he grumbles.
Ignoring you both Maneiac smiles insanely at you and raises herself higher with her hair.
“But be that as it may, I told you already, this city is mine to control and I won’t just hand it over to the likes of you!”
“But we’re not brainwashed! We’re not even from this world!” Twilight tries to interject but Maneiac just brushes her off.
“Nice try making your Puny Puppets try to lure me into a false sense of security Hooded Offender, but it won’t work. It’s time for you and those pests to finally be destroyed!”
“Oh yeah?” you challenge as your shards glow somewhat. “Well I don’t see how seeing as how you’re a C Class villain and supposedly I have this powerful group under my control.”
You point to your companions who are just looking at the whole situation curiously.
“Guys! Look tough and imposing!” you whisper yell.
“Oh right! We’ll beat you in the blink of an eye!” Spike growls as he gets into a running stance.
“And I’ll shock your ass till next Tuesday!” Ember pipes up holding her pendant.
“I’ll…Dazzle you I guess?” Grandbuggy throws out.
“I don’t want to fight, but if you attack I will defend myself!” Twilight says.
“Skreonk!” Mangle barks.
“…I got rope?” Greta says lamely.
“And I’ll-“ Garble starts but is cut off by the Maneiac’s laughter.
“Oh this is rich, you’ve still let them retain their do-gooder attitude even under your control. Even small, pathetic, useless, stupid Hum Drum, Muhahahahaha!!!”
“…Hey,” Garble moans sounding hurt.
“Yeah, sure I did all that in this stupid smear campaign,” you roll your eyes. “So you’re kind of screwed because I got numbers on my side and-“
“Ohohohoho, you think I came here alone?” she says with a toothy grin.
“Uhhh…” you stammer.
“I mean, if you can get some puny heroes under control, then why can’t I?”
Ello Calebero’s Comment
Suddenly there are multiple loud thuds from behind your group.
Turning around your jaw drops as you see several figures, all of them with glowing green eyes, but one stands out to you the most.
“What the Buck?!” you yelp as a figure clad in a red hat and coat with a toothy gas mask walks into the light.
“Crimson Vengeance?” Greta squawks out in surprise just as a text box shows up in front of him labeling him as just that.
“Criminal Scum…” comes a deep, brainwashed voice that is clearly NOT your father’s. And why would it be? This is a comic book, and whoever drew this has CV clearly being portrayed as a dark colored stallion.
“Yes my precious bounty hunter, all of them enemies to the state,” Maneiac says gleefully and the bounty hunter scowls at you.
“Hooded…Offender…” he growls and you gulp as you were definitely not prepared for this strange psychological nightmare happening right now.
“Oh for-This is giving me a headache,” Grandbuggy voices your feelings just as the other figures enter into frame, with text boxes flashing in front of each one.
There is a blue unicorn mare clad in blue robes, with water circling her, who is labeled as Aqua, despite her not having the same face. There is a big hulking robot labeled as Sentry 1 which looks like a stylized version of that robot back in Vanhoover, which also gives Grandbuggy the shudders. Then there’s a griffon female in a skin tight blue outfit with the name Zero and Greta’s jaw drops.
“What the-IS THAT ME?!” she squawks as the other griffon narrows her glowing eyes at her.
Then there is someone labeled as The Surgeon, wearing doctor scrubs, a mask, and holding a giant mallet.
If that’s supposed to be Quack Salver, they clearly don’t know how crazy that guy iiiiiii…
Your thoughts trail off as a shorter figure steps out. She is a unicorn with dark purple hair, a dark blue coat, and she wears an officer’s uniform. She is labeled as The Filly.
If your brain was hurting before, it’s exploded by now as the representation of you from when you led the troops at Arkhay glares at you.
“Hey, she kind of looks like you Ni-“ Spike starts to say.
“I noticed!”
“Muhahahahaha! Isn’t it only fitting that the Hooded Offender should be defeated by heroes isn’t it? But I know how dangerous you are…” she then whistles and some stereotypical goons show up behind the brainwashed heroes, laughing and grinning at your group.
As Maneiac cackles on the roof and your group looks between the enemy and themselves, you grit your teeth in annoyance as your shards blip.
Whoever wrote this is a hack and I’ll sick that angry comic nerd guy in the pretty hat after them!
“Um, Spike? What are we supposed to do here?” asks Twilight nervously.
“I think we have to fight Twi. It’s a comic book after all,” he says with a gulp.
Master of Shadows’s Comment
“Good plan!” you say before rushing towards the other group, right at the twisted representation of your Dad’s bounty hunter persona. A moment later, the others follow suit, yelling and running at your enemy. A part of you is elated that you get to fight like a super hero, and you feel like you have to say something cool.
“OFFENDER AWAAAAAY!!!”
Everyone, including the enemy, look at you funny as you continue your rush and you mentally facehoof.
DOH! That was so lame!
WHAT DO YOU DO?
