I woke up slowly in the deep darkness, I was hungry. I would get up and look out, it was dark. I must have fallen asleep so upset about what had happened. Even though I didn't think I'd slept that long.
I silently came out of my room and walked into the kitchen where a plate under a bell was waiting for me. This was supposed to be last night's meal. They certainly didn't want to wake me up and kept the dish.
I lifted the lid and saw a dish... of carrots. I was certainly going to have to get used to eating carrots when your foster mother had a full garden and a special talent for growing them.
So I ate my meal and went home quickly to bed. However, there were noises of voices from my new protectors' room. I stuck my ear and listened in a completely indiscreet way:
"... I'm worried about Anon, Blueblood. She had a seizure this afternoon. She bit a pegasus that was bothering the neighbor's son! When I punished her, she started screaming and then I heard her talking to herself in her room. The poor thing even started talking about rape. Blueblood, do you think she... "
"Calm down, Carrot! Anon had to experience monstrous things in her childhood that... will remain engraved in it. But we have to help him move on. We'll talk to a doctor who specializes in disorders. If everyone gets on with it, Anon will heal. "
It was... nice and at the same time so wrong. I was returning to my bed troubled by the conversation. They thought I had had a seizure that pushed me into a kind of rage.
Suddenly I heard something banging on the door. I carefully got out of bed and opened the door. No one, the noise resounded again and actually seemed to come from the closet.
I walked forward worried and petrified at the touch of the handle. I pull myself together, what could I be afraid of? I was already dealing with the worst bastard in history.
I opened the door and contemplated a sleeping valley, illuminating with a few lights in the distant darkness. When, a shadow on the side of the door that I hadn't noticed, pushed me and entered my room.
The cupboard door closed as the creature that had entered my room illuminated it with a blue light from a kind of cane. It seemed to be an old man dressed in grey with a grey hat of the magician style.
The creature turned around and revealed a beard... plastic? I finally recognized Lord Fear through the disguise that stood in front of me.
"Would you be interested in a young filly adventure? "
"Uh..... What?"
"Would you like to join me on an exciting adventure? "
"You are Lord Fear, aren't you? "
"Yes, but could you please answer my question? "
"What adventure are you talking about?" I asked suspiciously.
"I wish I had something quite precious that some people call Pip-Buck, a kind of cool military tablet if you prefer that hangs on your arm. Come with me and you will have one! "
"Forgive me, but I'm skeptical and I'm not sure I want to go on a whole adventure for a tablet hanging from my arm.... "
"I'll explain it more clearly, I want to have fun and I'm bored like a dead rat. I wanted you to come with me so that we could have a little fun together. I learned that you too need a change of scenery. "
It's true that I really needed to relax and since sleep would certainly not come, I naively accepted.
"Perfect, then after you Anon!" As a portal opened.
I found myself on the other side of the portal in a different world. This world seemed vast and desert. Lord Fear came out just after me from the gate, also staring at the cloudy horizon.
"Our destination is at the foot of this mountain range behind us but I wanted you to know that I have transformed you a little..."
I stopped listening to him starting to examine me right away. I was still a female green pony but I felt taller. I quickly realized that I was no longer a filly but a young adult.
My body resonated so... sexy and sensual! I contemplated myself in a mirror generously offered to me by Lord Fear, who in the meantime was studying a map rigorously in a boy scout outfit.
I was not only an adult mare but also a remarkably attractive mare. My voice seemed terribly deep and velvety. I noticed three notes of coloured music: blue, red and purple on my side.
"Lord Fear, what had you done? Why am I like this? "
"I thought it would be better for you to be an adult if we ever had problems. "
"Yes, but why if... "I was looking for my words, "sexy?"
"I have done nothing but make you older. You're a version of yourself as an adult with a certain charm I must say. I suppose the same is true for your cutie mark. Notice, you now know your particular talent! "
"The song?"
"Yes, art through hearing as I like to call it. "
Then I'd look like this when I grew up. No, I would find a way to become human again and find my old life again. Lord Fear looked at me without the shadow of a malicious attention that I finished contemplating myself.
"Now that you've familiarized yourself with your new body, can we go now? "
The trip to the wild and deserted lands was not long. Lord Fear guided me through this dusty landscape without the shadow of any sign of life outside the ruins of a farmhouse that I saw from quite far away.
The further we went towards the foot of the mountain in question, the more the terrain gradually changed into a kind of lifeless jungle. No animals, not even the slightest insects were hanging around here. I was beginning to worry about the lack of life signs.
We finally arrived at the foot of the mountain where there was the entrance to a dark and gloomy cave. I prayed inside that it would not be our destination.
Lord Fear, to my great misfortune, took two miners' helmets with integrated lamps out of his boy scout bag and gave me one. I quickly put on the helmet he had given me and without delay, we rushed into the immensity of the cave's darkness.
The inside of the cave was empty except for a large gear-shaped door at the bottom where Stable π was inscribed. Lord Fear whispered in a breath:
"Here we go."
"What is Stable π? »
"One of the first bunkers in equestrian history, forgotten by all, even by those creators in my humble opinion. Our reward is inside."
"Ponies have bunkers?"
"Not in your space-time, but here it is."
I found the answer disconcerting, I had to be in an alternative parallel universe where ponies build bunkers for reasons that still escape me.
"And why did the ponies in this universe build bunkers?"
"Later Anon, let's start by opening this door first."
Lord Fear took a toolbox out of his backpack. He approached the bottom left of the door and unscrewed a plate that was almost invisible to the naked eye.
After half an hour of passing the tools he asked for, the door opened in a heavy and creaking squeak. I felt all our work was rewarding.
"Be careful, Anon, I have absolutely no idea what's in there."
Fascinating like an explorer discovering a thousand-year-old tomb, I nodded distractedly.
The interior was bright and clean. A reception desk on the bunker was in front of us where only the echo of our footsteps echoed. Panels on the back wall indicated the different possible ways out of the paths open to us.
"Stay alert Anon, this place is far too clean to be honest."
"Understood, look on the panel, Pip-Buck maintenance."
I was moving forward, very happy that our "adventure" was to unlock an old bunker forget when I was pulled out of my thoughts by a red ray that narrowly missed my cheek.
I looked up and saw a small, rounded robot holding a laser gun in a mechanical arm, I could feel my heart beating. Before the second shooted pulled between my eyes, a sword pierced it through the machine, disabling the shot.
With the hairs ruffled, I hurried to take the gun from the dead robot. Lord Fear continued to follow me silently.
The rest of our journey to the Pip-Buck maintenance center went smoothly where we no longer met anyone. The room in question was grey and dull, the people who had to work here all had to end up depressed. A row of Pip-Bucks was standing on a cupboard waiting to be picked up. Me and Lord Fear each grabbed one of us, watching over their good condition.
I noticed in a corner, a pony skeleton in yellow and blue wetsuit that seemed to have been victim of a gun through the hole in the wetsuit touching his heart, this scene froze my blood.
We were about to leave when a machine that looked vaguely like a robot looking like a pony entered the room.
"Stealing is punished by: dying! "
Lord Fear knocked his sword to the side of the creature, which cut the surface a little bit without damaging the new machine enough. I noticed the minigun starting to turn on the right side of the machine when Fear screamed:
"Press the S.A.T.S. mod!"
I rushed to do it and contemplated the world slowing down and becoming a little green while the parts of the machine were displayed in percentage of critical hit.
I noticed my 100% critical hit to the head and hit him twice in the head. The world came back to normal as I noticed that I had my gun in my mouth during the shooting.
In front of me, the machine stopped moving and collapsed softly on the ground. Lord Fear hurried to take the minigun and ammunition from him. Meanwhile I was panting a lot.
I got up and still wavering in shock, I set out to create a makeshift armor with the pieces of metal here.
Lord Fear, tense, was waiting for me as he looked at the Pip-Buck's options before orienting his so that I could see.
"Look Anon, this scanner option will allow us to avoid the path of any enemy."
Some kind of radar pointed to the red dots as the enemy and... they were full of them.
With the help of our Pip-Bucks, we avoided the machines, however, three of them seemed to be waiting at theentrance of the bunker on our radars. Lord Fear used his mirror as we stood at a corridor intersection of them to see what these three red dots were to reveal two machine guns and a sentinel that did not move a centimetre between us and our freedom.
"Okay Anon, I'll get their attention while you sneak under the counter and then you fart the turrets and we'll take care of the sentry."
"Lord Fear, I'm a little scared."
"Don't worry Anon, the people who will tell you that they don't have fears at times like this are either liars or fools."
"What if we die?"I began to shake like a leaf.
"Anon," Lord Fear touched my shoulder, "I promise I won't let anything happen to you."
Then before I could add anything else, Lord Fear approached the three enemies who automatically pointed their weapons at him. Taking a quick breath, I crawled on all fours to the counter desk. A loud and loud sound came to my ears when the three machines fired at Lord Fear before he could even fire the minigun.
I rushed out of the office with my head and fired two bullets at each of the turrets, both too busy on Lord Fear to notice my presence. The impact of my bullets shattered them. The sentry turned to me but did not fire.
"She can no longer shoot for the moment, she pulls the control box at the back," Lord Fear whispered weakly.
I ran as fast as I could and came behind the sentry where I could see the control board. I quickly aimed at the objective and wanted to shoot.
Unfortunately, I had just realized that my weapon no longer had the energy to fire. The machine turned around and prepared to shoot me as I covered my face with my hooves in fear. However, nothing seemed to happen.
A familiar dark blade came out of the inside of the metal monster, which went out in a mechanical noise. Lord Fear entered my field of vision, he had more holes like a cheese rapper and stared at me before he collapsed unconscious on the ground.
"No, please no! Lord Fear, wake up, I beg you. God help him, I don't want him to die, he saved my life. He can't die like that. Please don't let him die!"
"Thank you Anon!" Lord Fear was staring at me as the holes in his armor began to disappear.
"Again, thank you!" He got up like a gentleman. "Only fear can fix me."
"Thank God you're safe and sound! Are you feeling all right?!"
"I'm fine. You saved me from having to tell Hatred that I left you alone in a dimension!"
"I suppose."
"Well, let's hurry and get out of here. I hope our adventure will have pleased you, Anon. We will soon make new ones."
Before I realized what was happening to me, a wormhole opened under my feet as I fell into it.
I landed on my soft bed gently as the wormhole above my head closed. So I did it? I had gone into a bunker full of killer robots and survived?
It was still hard for me to believe it, but I noticed the soft glow from my Pip-Buck reminding me of the very real reality of our adventure with Fear and me.
I raised my paw and contemplated the little technological marvel that was wrapped around my hoof. A small piece of paper protruded from a slot in the device.
I took it as best I could and discovered a note from Lord Fear that seemed destined for me.
He told me that he was leaving me the Pip-Buck and that in order to make it discreet, he had made it visible to me alone. I smiled at this prospect, after my adventure with the robots, I think it would have been difficult for me to feel safe without it.
I also realized when I contemplated my room, still dark, that I had become a child again. I suddenly noticed a repetitive noise behind me that seemed to have already been there for a while.
I turned around and watched Lord Hatred standing still, picking chips from a packet from time to time. This guy is the most unhealthy thing in the world.
He kept eating those crisps staring at me like he watch a movie. I coughed trying to show him that I had seen her, but he didn't move.
"Lord Hatred?"
"Quiet Anon!"
"Why are you staring at me like that?"
"Shut up, stupid filly!"
I silently contemplated myself contemplating him in such a way as to give him back his gaze. Finally, he came next to me on the bed throwing the bag of chips.
"I suppose you went with Lord Fear to get such a device! "He said, pointing my Pip-Buck in a tone full of reproach.
"Yes, but it's none of your business! "Slightly turning away from him.
"Anon, I have a question for you! Do you want to end up like your friend the caretaker? »
I panted slightly as I thought about the head of the caretaker of the building coming off his body.
"Nope!"
"Where were you?"
"We went into a bunker full of killer robots."
"He loses nothing to wait for, give me that!"
Lord Hatred grabbed my Pip-Buck and tried in vain to remove it from my handle.
"And besides, you can't take it off! Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, I wanted to tell you that I was coming with you today!"
"With me?"
"Yes, let's have breakfast, with your night trip, it's already morning."
I didn't know what to think, Lord Hatred was going to show up?
I gently walked out of my room and into the dining room, I saw Blueblood and Carrot Top looking at me like an alien. So he was seeing him?
"See?"
"Yes, Anon... How do you..."
"Look, he's here! "Pointing my hoof at Lord Hatred, who simply saluted with his hand.
"Who's there, sweetheart?" Carrot Top asked worried.
"Lord Hatred, the red armor, right there!"
Both looked at each other for a moment with a fake smile on their faces.
"Oh, of course. Sorry Anon, we didn't see that your friend Lord Hatred was with us. Come and sit with us."
"Good morning, Mr. Lord Hatred. Anon, could you take these socks off your feet? If you're cold, we can go buy you slippers. Socks don't really serve that purpose."
What? I looked at my hooves and found four pairs of orange and yellow socks at my feet. Carrot Top was blushing deeply for some reason.
I watched Lord Hatred contemplating the carrot garden from the window. So they didn't see him? Definitely one of those magic tricks.
I sighed for a long time as I took my socks off my hooves. Too bad, it was silky. So I sat down and started eating my bowl of oats.
I noticed that the bowl and many other things such as a fork, spoon, knife had been modified so that I could take them with my hoof. I found the attention delicate and no refusal, I smiled back at them.
Throughout lunch, Blueblood and Carrot Top asked me a lot of questions such as if I wanted to have a different colour for my room, if there were any sports activities I wanted to do.
I would just answer yes or no and don't trying to sound rude. Finally, Blueblood smiled tenderly at me and crushing these hooves seemed to be preparing to tell me something.
"We didn't know how to tell you, Anon, but it's about me. Carrot and I have been thinking all day about how to tell you and..."
Carrot laughed.
"Come on, Blueblood, get to the point!"
"I... I am a prince!"
"Prince?"
I looked at him doubtful, except for the elegant bow tie, Blueblood didn't look like a prince. Besides, why would he live here and with Carrot Top?
"I know Anon, Prince Blueblood is known to have a bad reputation but... I have changed! "He insisted at the very end of his sentence.
"Are you really a prince?"
"Yes, Blueblood was a prince... a little tyrannical. But he became softer and nicer afterwards and then we met and moved here!"
I wasn't very convinced, but I let it happen. After that, Blueblood and Carrot Top insisted that we go to the sports clubs in Ponyville to see which sports I might like.
So I followed them with my unwanted companion in red armor who just followed me behind without any noise.
Suddenly, as I walked carefully, I felt a strong pat on my butt. I turned around furiously to find Lord Hatred looking the other way.
I began to forget the personal insult he had given me and went back on my way when I felt another hand on my buttocks a little stronger than the previous one. I turned around and whispered in a low voice:
"Stop it!"
He approached my ear and said to me in a menacing voice:
"Anon, I do what I want when I want!"
I didn't know it again, catching up with Blueblood and Carrot Top when I was pulled with energy. I shouted a sharp little cry so sudden and strong was the pain and I fell to the ground. Carrot Top and Blueblood noticed it.
"Are you all right, Anon? What happened? What happened? »
"I" looked at Lord Hatred with fury and sighed defeated. "I'm fine, I stepped on my tail."
"Yes, it also happened to me when I was your age. "Says Blueblood looking away as if he could see what he was talking about.
Carrot Top sat next to me and hugged me.
"Poor Anon, don't worry! The pain will go away quickly. Mom and Dad are with you. »
"No, please let go of me! I'm fine, Carrot!"
I fiercely broke her sweet embrace and got up, I was really tired of being seen as a fragile and weak little thing. However, my gesture saddened Carrot Top who seemed hurt by my gesture.
We were on our way again as I walked behind them with my head down. I felt bad for pushing Carrot Top away. I saw her in front of me, all sad, who must have thought she was a terrible mother.
"Every action has these consequences Anon," Lord Hatred whispered with a hint of joy in his sentence.
I didn't even bother to answer and instead breathed a frustrated sigh.
The town hall I had been told about was inevitably getting closer to us until we rushed into it. The hall was held by a mare who was reading a book where there was no one.
Blueblood coughed to let our presence be known, which made him look up at us. A wide warm smile appeared on her face as she placed her book on a corner of the desk.
"Hello, how can I help you?"
"Hello, we wanted to see the sporting activities of Ponyville!"
"To do that, you have to go see Mayor Mare in her office!"
"Thank you!"
"You're welcome, it was a pleasure to chat with other ponies for once," she sighed.
I kept silent on this last remark and followed Blueblood and Carrot Top to the so-called mayor's office which was in the middle of administrative paperwork.
Carrot Top and Blueblood greeted her cheerfully and asked her about the different sports activities that existed in Ponyville for foals.
"Hello to you! Usually I am the one who presents the activities proposed for our young foals and fillies in Ponyville but... it is important that I write this as soon as possible," she says, pointing to her scroll which was easily twice my size.
"However," she continued looking at me with a calm smile. "I'm sure Dark Light would be happy to show your charming filly the sporting activities offered by Ponyville."
And so we found ourselves in the company of an adult female bat pony with a red cap and a white t-shirt that explained Ponyville's sporting activities in an almost fanatical way.
I had to stop following his long monologue because the discussion suddenly stopped. The bat pony named Dark Light looked at me with his lightning glance while Carrot Top and Blueblood looked at me.
"I think it would be better to go straight to practice!" She judged.
"Practice?"
"Yes, the best way to judge if you like a sport is to practice it! »
"But I don't like sports!" I say in a tone perhaps a little too plaintive.
"You have to try before you judge! Isn't that right, sir and ma'am?" She said, turning to my equine parents.
"Yes, of course... You have to try, but if she doesn't want to..."
"It's her health that's at stake," she cut her hair dry." It is urgent that she get into sport or she will look like a green potato in the near future. What are you feeding her?"
"We've only had it for a few days..."
"I want a real answer!"
"I gave him carrots from my garden," Carrot Top said.
"All right, but think about varying his diet. Can I keep your daughter for the rest of the afternoon to have her try out some sports?"
"In the afternoon? That's a lot and we don't really know each other! »
"Do I look like a foalnapper?"
"No, but..."
"Then get out of my sight!"
And so my two legal guardians left under the last roar of the dark mare. Lord Hatred, who had been there all along, was looking at the scene as I was.
"To both of us Anon!"
Oh, shit! I turned to see the imposing coach in front of me with a look of absolute concentration.
-*-*-*-Later-*-*-*-
"I can't take it anymore! »
"Come on, Anon, if you can still talk, it's because you're not tired yet."
A quarter of an hour later I fell covered with scratches due to my incessant falls during the running session.
We had tried many sports such as ballet (again), bowling and even running but I didn't like anything. Dark Light said she wanted me to hold on for my own good, but I was just tired of it.
I looked away at Lord Hatred who was plucking a daisy as he looked at the sun at its zenith. Dark Light growled in a low voice that it was already time for the break and took me to lunch.
Accompanying the pervert in red armor who started these perverse games again as soon as I turned my back on him, I entered a city hall. Passed a whole row of corridors to enter one of the last doors at the back. We entered a dark room.
Dark Light shot with his mouth on a switch revealing a small square room where pictures of her and other ponies rested. I recognized on one of them, the little foal that had accidentally thrown a balloon in my face next to Dark Light.
Both smiled and stood against each other, I deduced that Dark Light must have been his mother. Another one of the same kind was hung on a wall with a bat pony stallion where everyone seemed delighted.
"These are pictures of my family! Come and eat," she said, opening the brown package that was on her desk.
This one came out with two huge meatless croques-monsieur (obviously) that seemed to have kept some heat where you could see cheese dripping from all sides.
I was salivating in advance when a sigh brought me back to reality:
"And to think I made those sandwiches for myself and Shards Shadow for our day together!"
The poor bat pony seemed to have lost all her energy in her and looked away as if lost in these thoughts, the two sandwiches were now dripping on her hoof.
"What happened?"I was curious to learn more about my coach.
"It's none of your business! " She says furious," and then no, I'll tell you. It's been a while since Shards Shadow, my lover and I spent some time together. I had planned a whole romantic day just for the two of us and now his incessant work at the Royal Guard is holding him back once again in Canterlot."
"Oh, sorry."
"Don't be sorry if it's not your fault. Don't worry about my problems, here's your sandwich!"
I barely touched the sandwich with my hooves before I gobbled it up, which earned me the disapproving look from my coach. I suddenly noticed Lord Hatred's mysterious disappearance for some time now.
I was worried then, looking around the room looking for her presence with the help of the Pip-Buck but nothing. Meanwhile, Dark Light had planted these two canines in her sandwich that she was slowly enjoying.
Time passed when she began to speak:
"I'm done, we can go back to discovering your sport," she says joyfully.
"Great," I said, grinding my teeth.
"Don't make that face! Imagine the fulfilment you will have when you find the sport you like. Looking for the sport we like is like looking for our cutie mark which..."
I could no longer feel my legs under my feet as I fell from a purple vortex that had just opened under my feet.
I landed painfully on a shabby wooden floor as the darkness of the room grabbed me. I got up to realize that I was in the living room of an apartment. A continuous whistling sound came to my ears as I looked for its origin.
Instinctively and maybe out of sheer stupidity as my father would say, I followed the noise. I arrived in a dark room where it was difficult to distinguish anything. The whistle stopped as soon as I entered.
The light suddenly turned on, revealing a workshop where Lord Hatred was staring silently at me. I looked at him frowning as he began to point to a corner of the room to which I had not yet paid attention.
I turned my head and what I saw horrified me, a man sat blindfolded and sat tied to a chair with a strong leather tie. The face of the person twisted in the most absolute horror fearing for his life reminded me of someone.
It was a familiar face, but I had trouble putting a name to it. I looked at him more closely until I recognized his nose, it was Jason. He struggled energetically in his chair, but it resisted him.
Jason, my closest university buddy. The one I spent all my Friday nights with. One of my old best friends before I cut off ties with my family and friends when I went abroad.
"Anon, don't you want to know the truth?"
"The truth? The truth is, you kidnapped one of my old best friends, you're a disgusting monster. You.... "He put his finger on my mouth.
"No, alas Anon. I'm not this time the monster of history. I've studied most of your life carefully. Isn't there something that shocks you? Have you ever wondered how your parents learned about your sexual preferences?
Have you ever made the connection between the person who sent the photo to all the members of your so charming family and the destruction of your entire life. Think Anon, remember who is the person who posted the picture!"
"Jason... "I said in a breath. "He didn't know my family would react that way, he couldn't foresee. Please, leave him! »
"Or maybe on the contrary, he planned it too well. But then, just ask him! "Then he ripped the tape off Jason's mouth and removed these earplugs. "He's all yours," he said in a sardonic tone.
"I beg you, whoever you are, I will give you everything but don't kill me. »
"Well, my friend here would have some questions for you about a certain Anon."
"Anon, I haven't been around him for years. Since these parents learned of his illness, he has never spoken to me again."
"Sickness?" I said amazed.
"Yes, Anon was gay. When I found out, it shocked me. It was one night when he was drunk with me and confessed. I told him to go for treatment, but I don't think he remembered. Please, let go of me, please! Whatever Anon did, I'm not involved!"
"Shut up!" Threatened Hatred putting her sword up to the level of Jason's coup. "How did these parents find out?"
"Please, please, please, don't hurt me. I sent pictures of Anon kissing a guy at a party to his family. They had to know that Anon was sick so they could treat him."
"May I have the truth?"
"I swear to you, it's the truth."
"I want the real truth!"
"All right. Some college guys found out Anon was gay and they were making movies about him and me. And I was seriously starting to feel ashamed to have a fag buddy so...."
"So?"
"I sent the photo."
Shame? My best friend was ashamed of me. He was ashamed of who I was and how I felt. I felt tears flowing from my eyes as my heart compressed under the pain.
"I'm sorry Anon you had to hear such horror, but you had to. You had to know the origin of your illness. Now this evil must be destroyed."
"Anon, is that you? I beg you to save me. I'm sorry for everything I said to you. Forgive me...."
"I hate you, Jason! Do you hear that? I hate you, I thought you were my friend and you stabbed me. You tell my family everything and now they hate me. Everyone hates me and it's all your fault!"
"Please..."
"It is too late to forgive! Anon, please come in. The rest of this story will not be beautiful."
A wormhole opened next to me. Without even thinking, I rushed into it, leaving Jason's screams behind me.
The gate took me back to the city centre where I noticed that the sun was now orange on the horizon. Everywhere, voices were calling my name in the city. As I set out to walk the streets of Ponyville to digest what I had just heard, Dark Light came down beside me and shouted so that everyone would hear that she had found me.
I was staring at the angry floor, all those stupid ponies who think they're nice. But deep down, if they knew who I was, they would hate me like everyone else around me in my old life.
"Anon, are you all right? We have been very concerned. Your parents died of worries. Where have you been?"
"You don't care about me! I hate you! I hate you! Even my parents who don't even know me hate me. And when they get to know me better, they'll hate me even more too."
"Calm down Anon, your parents love you and I'm sure they'll love you even more afterward. As for me, even if I haven't known you for a long time, I care about you!"
I didn't answer anything anymore. I wanted to be alone, quiet. Being able to hurt alone in a dark place where no one would care about me. My reunion with my parents went in a fuzzy way. I was left alone with all their affections and worries, I didn't care.
As the evening fell, everyone went home. I refused my dinner and went back to my room where I was ready to hit my pillow quite violently to burst into tears halfway through. I'm a loser, a waste of society and a piece of shit without a friend and family.
If everyone hated me, I'd hate them back. ;)