//------------------------------//
// Investigation Game, Valey's Turn 
// Story: The Olden World 
// by Czar_Yoshi 
//------------------------------//

Valey made sure not to wake Felicity as she left to go about her day. "What time is it?" she quietly grumbled to herself as she stumbled away from the bed, noting sunlight filtering in through the heavily-drawn blinds. She nearly topped from dizziness as the sleepless last night caught up with her, catching herself and stepping through the door to the house lounge.

Two armored Equestrian pegasi were waiting on the other side.

"Oh bananas," Valey gulped, backpedaling, failing to notice the lack of a tingle in her cutie mark. "I'm serious, we didn't-"

The guards looked at her quizzically, the same ponies who had come ahead with her in the submarine. "You look unwell, miss," one said. "Are you alright?"

Valey sat on her rump and rubbed her head, then quickly hopped into a more dignified position. "What are you guys doing here?"

The guards nodded. "Doctor Lost World informed us there had been a break-in last night," the other informed her. "He said you were up all night helping him investigate, and requested that we guard your quarters to prevent your sleep from being disturbed by curious students."

"Apparently, this is big news on campus," the first added.

Valey squinted at them. "So we're not actually suspects at all, even though we were the ones who found it first."

The guards both squinted back. "Should you be? You know we're watching you closely. If you were going to break the rules, you'd run. You have nothing to gain from this whatsoever."

"Are you sure?" The second suddenly looked at the first, an idea dawning on them. "The professor seemed remarkably unbothered and the students are excited... What if they are responsible, and it's a staged performance?"

"An entertainment event?" The first squinted at his companion. "...Whatever. It still wouldn't be something we care about."

Valey stared for a moment at the exchange, slack-jawed. "Uhhh... No, I mean, we shouldn't be suspects. That's just how stuff works in the north. When bad luck happens, bad luck follows..." She glanced back at the door. "Never mind, I'll take it. What time is it?"

A guard checked a clock. "Two in the afternoon."

Valey groaned inwardly. So much for rising with the sun... "Cool, cool. I'm gonna go investigate... and stuff."

The guards both saluted as she strolled away.

"This is weird," Valey muttered under her breath, batting at an instinct that told her trouble had to be just around the corner. "Stuff can't really be this nice and cushy, can it? Where's the catch? Is someone messing with us? No one should know-"

She stepped out a doorway, and realized it was the weekend. Students who weren't in classes and were shooed out of their dorms by guards had to go somewhere...

A crowd of ponies intermingled on sunny, well-cared for lawns, with another ball game taking place in the backgrounds. Mares shared space on blankets, wearing shades and sunning their bellies with their legs to the sky, and stallions sat against pillars, reading, or walked in groups and shoved each other, laughing all the way. Valey self-consciously straightened her mane to just the right level of messy and adjusted her beret.

"It's her!" a voice called, and nearly a dozen pairs of eyes turned toward Valey.

"Uh, hey guys," Valey greeted, her tired brain deciding it would rather have a meet-and-greet than run and deal with the consequences. "What's up?"

"I heard the history archives were vandalized," a stallion said, running up with a bouncing mane and then halting a very safe distance away. "But there are guards in the Laughter quarters, and no one will let us in to see! They said you were there, though!"

Valey regarded him as several more crowded around, grinning as she put together half a plan. "Yup. There's a bunch of broken glass, and they can't clean it up without disturbing evidence. Don't want that getting stuck in your hooves." She mimed ramming a spike into the bottom of her hoof, wincing for emphasis.

Some of the students winced as well. "Oh my," a frilly pegasus mare breathed. "You didn't find that out the hard way, did you?"

"Nahhh." Valey winked. "I used special adventurer tactics to get past them. I'll teach you the secret... if I feel like it." Her eyes wandered to the blanket where two mares were still sunbathing, listening eagerly but reluctant to give up their pastime. "Hey, that looks pretty chill. Mind if I join, hot stuff?"

The mares looked smug, noting her wandering eyes, and moved over to make room.

"Neat." Valey settled down next to them, folding her hooves behind her head and closing her eyes up at the sky. "The trick to glass and other sharp things," she said, basking in the tiny murmurs of envy from some of the other students, "is that your skin isn't actually that frail. It only gets cut if you try to cut with enough force. Glass is bad 'cuz you step on it with a whole bunch of weight. Who wants to guess where I'm going with this?"

"Tread lightly and carefully," an eager stallion piped up. "Move slowly, handle the pieces delicately, and it'll be fine! That's what I told my mom every time she made me clean up broken dishes!"

"Nah." Valey kicked a leg. "That's the way that seems to work until you mess up and get hurt anyway. Much better just to put zero weight on it... with these babies." She flexed her sarosian wings, hoping none of the students knew just how little flying room there was in the archive.

Her bluff paid off. "Flying feels like cheating," the frilly pegasus said, downcast. "You made it sound like you had clever, secret knowledge."

"The most secret of all," Valey replied, keeping her toothy grin. "When it comes to using a boring tool that's all mundane and stuff, or being unnecessarily clever and getting glass stuck in your hoof? Cool ponies don't get glass stuck in their hooves. There's some real adventuring know-how for you."

This had a more positive effect. Valey heard the mumbles of appreciation increase, along with a few new sets of joining hoofsteps, and stretched mightily, showing her toned figure off with utterly no subtlety.

"So what's the word on the street about the break-in?" Valey asked, her audience completely captive. "I'm curious how the rumors are holding up to the real latest scoop."

"Oh! I heard," the frilly pegasus bubbled, "that it might have been pirates from Griffonstone. Someone said a ship was spotted near the harbor this morning running their flag!"

"Pirates from Griffonstone?" Valey opened her eyes and sat up slightly, squinting at the pegasus. She smiled hopefully back.

Valey made a mental note to investigate that as soon as possible. "Well, I wouldn't put it past them, but the real biggest lead? This was done by students." She swept her eyes dramatically around. "Someone thinks there might not have been anything stolen at all, and the culprit wanted me and my friends to do an investigation as a show. And you all are finding this pretty entertaining..."

Most of the students gave each other suspicious, mistrustful looks. The frilly pegasus gasped, and the two mares Valey was sunning with looked too satisfied by their company to care.

"Of course, I haven't had too much time to look into that. Been busy browsing records and stuff all day." Valey waved a hoof, then raised an eyebrow. "And I'm new around here, so if there was some faction or something that would be more likely to do that, I wouldn't know. Sure wish I had, like, someone who knew who'd do such a thing well enough to point me in the right direction."

Predictably, the crowd fell apart, each pony wanting to be the one with the suggestion. Valey kept her eyes closed, listening to the chaos around her with a grin.

"...I'm gonna open my eyes in three seconds," she eventually warned. "And everyone who I see jumping to help me and be a hero is automatically suspect because of course you'd set yourself up to look good, three two one kaboom." She opened her eyes.

Even the self-satisfied sunbathers who had been laying with her had joined the circle standing around her, and every last pony in it was frozen, looks of realization spreading contagiously across their faces as they realized what she had just said.

"Nyaah." Valey got up, making a show of stretching. "Well, that confirms that. Maybe someone did set this up as a show to make themselves the sidekicks. Congratulations, you just helped me narrow the suspects down to everyone." She pushed her way through the circle, patting the frilly pegasus on the back on her way out. "You're the cutest one here, by the way. Wear that title with pride."

Valey pretended to rocket off across campus, but flipped and turned so many times that she eventually landed on the steepled Laughter dorm roof, right near where she had started. The students she had attracted were still dispersing, and she watched them from the eves like a gargoyle, flicking her tail and rubbing her chin.

Well, she had confirmed it was possible that other students could be behind this... maybe? They certainly weren't above being pushy if it meant a place next to her. Not that she didn't know that already, but it didn't hurt to make-

"Do you flirt with everything that moves?" a familiar voice groaned.

"What? Feeling left out?" Valey turned to see Lavender Curtain also on the roof, her coloration letting her blend into the shingles. "Bananas, how long have you been there?"

"Since before you came outside," Lavender replied curtly. "This is my thinking spot."

Valey backpedaled a step. "Whoops. Sorry for intruding. Didn't mean to impose."

Lavender blinked hard, then frowned at her. "You treat me completely different from all of them. How are you so cordial to me, yet borderline scandalous down there?"

"Because you don't like me." Valey shrugged.

Lavender stared, her jaw slack. "Northern logic makes no sense," she ultimately said, shaking her head.

"Tell me about it," Valey complained. "I keep expecting us to get in trouble because they think we did it. It looks like we did it, doesn't it? Please tell me there's someone here who realizes that me and my friends should be on thin ice."

Lavender's eyes shifted. "What does me not liking you have to do with how you're acting?"

Valey waved a wing. "Those kids down there are obsessed with me. I can play with them and tease them however I want, and as long as it's not cruel or mean-hearted, they'll know it's all a game. A game they're super passionate about, but a game nonetheless. Kinda like your sports." She turned to regard Lavender. "But I've got a real bad first impression with you, and I've had too many enemies come stab me when I'm down before to want any more. So congrats. You get nice Valey."

"That's unusual," Lavender sighed, sitting awkwardly. "You're not pulling my leg, are you? I didn't take you for someone who cared."

"Girl..." Valey leaned back. "I care a lot, and I usually care so much it gets me hurt. I dunno if you've ever felt like your world was sinking around you, and for all I know you have, but this place is like a big mental vacation for me. I can care. If this place gets attacked by a giant monster or something and it really needs it, I'll care... or if I need to in order not to get on bad terms with someone. But if I can get away with it, I really need to kick back and let loose for once. Sorry for any irreverence where it's undue. Is that so bad?"

Lavender frowned in discomfort. "...I'm starting to see that. I still don't like you."

"Anything I can do about it?" Valey raised a hopeful eyebrow.

"Stop flirting with the undergraduates," Lavender instantly replied. "Please."

"Why?" Valey asked. "I heard about the thing from five years ago, but these ponies are really digging it. I'm paying attention, I don't bother the ones who aren't obviously into me."

"I'm a sixth-year," Lavender said dully. "I was there when W... When my friend left with that stallion. The most the ponies responsible for Laughter's current culture remember is what it was like in the years after that. It was bad, but this is nothing like what it was like before, either. Can you honestly see yourself living a life here, surrounded by ponies who only care about your flanks and your legs and your barrel? Or your ability to do a backflip, maybe? You're enjoying it now, but wouldn't it get lonely?"

Valey winced. "Okay, so it's an opposite extreme to what I'm used to and not a perfect middle ground. I get the point. I still need this, though."

"To what you're used to?" Lavender blinked. "I said to what the house used to be like."

"Yeah, but to what I'm used to as well," Valey said with a shrug. "Fun fact about the north: both of the places I went really hated batponies. One, you were a villain and didn't even get a chance. Another, there was a crazy goddess who had us and everyone else at odds with each other. Maybe this isn't perfect, but it's something I really need and you're gonna have to be more specific if you want me to throw this chance in the trash bucket and be a chaste little angel who doesn't even look at the flanks that are being waved in her face."

Lavender looked troubled.

"...If there are old wounds, I didn't mean to stir any up," Valey added. "You've got that look that says you've seen a thing or two."

"...The reason I'm still here after six years," Lavender sighed, "is because I've been attending school part-time so that I can help take care of my younger sister's foal so she has time to go to classes and do her homework in the day and doesn't derail her own education for her mistakes." She glanced up, and her eyes briefly burned. "Is that stirred up enough for you? Maybe you don't have problems that lowly with your crazy goddesses in the north, but I don't think there's anything beneath notice about a situation that prevents someone from following their dreams and I've never seen anything good come of this free-spirited philandering. We might not care if you steal any players this time, and the only one you can leave with consequences is yourself, but you're still contributing to this... this culture of free-spirited philandering, and...!"

Valey raised an eyebrow. "Honestly, that sounds exactly like the kind of stuff we've been dealing with."

Lavender blinked. "Really?"

"Yeah." Valey sat back and sighed. "The problems where you feel like your life could be on track for happiness, bananas, whatever success looks like to you... except for this one little problem you can't quite solve, and every time you try, more time passes and you get just a little further away. You probably feel like you've missed all sorts of opportunities in the past two years because of this. You don't wanna question whether it was worth it, but you do dream of it being all over, even if that seems ridiculously far out of your reach. And now I guess it looks like I'm rubbing it in..."

Slowly, Lavender's face tightened. Then she took off one of the boots on her forehooves, lifted it, and showed a bandage carefully applied to the bottom.

Valey blinked hard. "Wait, wha...?"

"Right," Lavender sighed. "I did it because I wanted to see what your reactions would be. There's nothing missing from the professor's archive."

Valey stared at her. "You know, the very first thing I thought when I saw you there was that you were setting us up. What gives? And why tell me now?"

"To see your reactions," Lavender repeated. "Stepping on the glass was a mistake, but I could have covered for it if you tried to silence me when you realized what it looked like. I slipped while trying to knock over a bookshelf to get your attention." She averted her gaze. "I still don't like you, but it's just personality clash. You aren't clueless buffoons. You understand."

"So..." Valey stared at her hoof.

"You can stop investigating and catch up on sleep," Lavender finished. "There's no danger and no need to keep searching. I can turn myself in. Just don't expect things to get back to normal for you with the culture here the way it is."

Slowly, Valey smirked. "Oh, I don't think we're gonna do that."

"Huh?" Lavender blinked.

"I owe you a good turn, right?" Valey held out her hooves and shrugged. "Everyone makes mistakes, all this one cost us was some sleep, and you had legit concerns. I forgive you. So lemme bail you out of this. We'll keep watch again tonight with the professor in case the crook comes back, then you try to sneak past us to mess more things up. We catch you, and then I tell the professor we had the whole thing staged from the beginning to give him and the school a fun, dramatic adventure. I'll get the rest of my friends in on it, and we'll cover for you. Sound cool?" She smiled hopefully.

Lavender stared at her. "...Why?"

"I told you." Valey turned back out to face the schoolgrounds. "Because I'm seriously tired of having enemies. You just made a peace offering, so here. I'm returning it." She held out a hoof. "Let's do this?"

Lavender took it reluctantly, then firmly. "I'll trust you," she said, a flicker of intensity in her eyes. "Please be trustworthy."

"Oh, girl," Valey replied with a grin. "We're gonna make this legendary."