Longing for the Past

by Fantasia


Hopeful Horizons

"Pizza's here!"

Twilight, who had been sitting back on the living room couch, sat up suddenly, her ears pointed and at full alert.

Two weeks had passed since the day Rainbow had invited her to move in, and needless to say, she was quick to make herself at home.

Rainbow threw open the front doors of her home, carrying in her hooves a thin box, and several envelopes on top of it. "Picked the mail up too!"

"Anything interesting?" Twilight asked, then smiled meekly. "And thank Celestia. My stomach's been grumbling all morning..."

"Really?" Rainbow laughed, undoing the scarf from her neck, and hanging it on the coat rack. "Well, let's see if we can fix that."

She flew over, setting the box on the coffee table in front of the couch, and flipped it open.

The smell of it hit Twilight's nostrils immediately, making her mouth water.

The sauce, the cheese, the... pineapples...

Twilight wasted no time at all digging in.

"Mm," she moaned as she scarfed down a slice.

She wasn't kidding... Rainbow thought, just watching for a moment before focusing her attention elsewhere. She returned to the envelopes she held in her hooves.

She looked back at Twilight, and the huge, fleece blanket covering her lower half along with most of the couch.

She took a seat beside her friend, and with a free hoof, threw some of the blanket over her own hind legs, before skimming through the mail.

"Junk... junk... Wonderbolts newsletter, book catalog..." Her hooves froze and her eyes widened as she skimmed a sealed envelope, bearing the enameled seal of the Canterlot Guard.

She wasted no time peeling it open, pulling out a folded letter from within, and unraveling it before her eyes.

Her lips formed a relieved smile as she skimmed the subject line.

"Hm?" Twilight leaned her head over in interest. "Whut ish it?" she asked, her mouth full of pizza.

Rainbow turned to look at her with a grin, flashing her the letter.

"Looks like more changelings have been rounded up."

Twilight gulped down the remainder of her food quickly, a look of astonishment coming over her face. "For real? W-where?" she asked. "H-how many?"

"Uh... let's see... Seven in Baltimare, another five in Filly Delphia... four in Vanhoover, and... ten in Las Pegasus?" Rainbow pulled her her head back, raising an eyebrow. "Seriously?"

"That's... twenty six altogether..." An elated grin quickly parted her lips, and she fell back once more into the welcoming embrace of the couch, letting out a jovial laugh. "Yes! Take that... changeling scum!"

She pumped a hoof into the air, cuing Rainbow to look down at her, bemused.

"Did you get into my cider cabinet while I was out?"

"Why?" Twilight's grin fell, her face fashioning a more serious look. "Do I seem tipsy to you?"

Before Rainbow could answer, Twilight shrugged it off.

"Well I'm not, and I would never take from you without your permission—er, w-well! Besides your foreleg... That I took... not that I meant to—"

"Twilight?"

Twilight stopped her rambling.

"Let's not dwell on the past... okay?"

"Oh, uh... s-sure, Dash." Twilight looked around as the awkwardness began to set in. "How's the new arm working out anyway? Still holding up?"

"Like a charm." Rainbow smiled, and removed her foreleg from under their blanket to assure her friend. It was adorned with artificial blue fur, and Twilight could still tell it was a prosthetic from the screws, and indents in its joints, but only when she really looked for them.

"Yeah, it's... been a few days now, and it's still... light as a feather, and durable, warm... I know it's not blood flowing through this arm—that it's all just wires and insulated circuitry, but... it really feels like a part of me, you know?"

"That's good."

"What about you, Twilight?"

"What about me?"

Rainbow made a wry frown, pointing a hoof to the top of her own head.

"Uhm..." Twilight blinked, her eyes slowly widening in realization. "O-oh, uh...! My horn transplant, r-right..."

Rainbow raised an eyebrow, urging her to continue.

"S-sorry, I... I know I've been putting it off. I haven't broken my promise to you, I just..." She shrugged apathetically, lowering her gaze. "Haven't felt like... I've had a real reason to..."

"Twi—"

"No, I'm serious, Rainbow! I've sort of just... enjoyed living life as a pegasus, and... I don't know..." She glanced around, a little on edge. "Maybe a pony like me is just... I dunno, better off without magic."

"How could you even say such a thing, Twilight? Magic is—"

"—Who I am. I know." Or was, I suppose...

Rainbow's brow furled. "Then why—?"

"Because! Look at what my magic does, the pain it causes others! I could never control it, Dash... and I'm thinking maybe I'd just be better off without it..."

"That's crazy talk, Twilight! Come on, you've just been without it for a couple weeks, and you probably just forgot how cool it can be! Trust me, as soon as you're able to conduct magic again, you'll be thrilled to have it back!"

"Maybe, but... What if I feel like... I don't deserve to have it back..."

"I'd say you're being too harsh on yourself," Rainbow murmured in response, then sighed. "Twilight, I... thought you were done beating yourself up? I thought you were still just... taking it easy, and that's why you weren't leaving the house, or why you still hadn't mailed, er... that back."

She motioned to the coffee table, where, on the edge sat Sombra's red horn... encased within a glass jar.

Her expression turned distasteful. "That thing seriously gives me the creeps... Can't we at least store it somewhere else for the time be—?"

"No!" Twilight cut her off, leaving her startled. "I'm sorry, but... no... I can't really explain it, I just..."

"It's serving as a reminder... isn't it?"

"Rainbow?"

"Twilight, you... gotta stop punishing yourself over what happened. If not for yourself, then... at least do it for me, the girls, Spike... and all the ponies whose lives have been affected by this whole ordeal. We're counting on you to pull through, and rise to the occasion like you've done so many other times that something bad came our way. You're like, the one we always come to for answers, the one who always manages to instill hope in every one of us, you're...!" Rainbow blushed, smiling softly as she gazed away. "You're the best part of me, Twilight... 'cause without you, I... don't know where I'd be..."

Twilight's eyes slowly grew bigger all the while as she listened, her friend's confession tugging at her heart strings. Rainbow... I... "Don't know what to say..." Other than you're right. I have been punishing myself without ever considering how much you all still look up to me... I suppose that's why I still haven't even confessed to you, Rainbow... She sniffled, looking back at her, a little teary-eyed. I've been convincing myself that... I don't deserve a pony like you...

"Say yes to going out with me this week."

Twilight's eyes flew open. "S-say what?!"

Rainbow shrugged, oblivious. "Yeah, I mean... the girls and I were planning on having a little get together at Sugarcube Corner, just like old times, and... I'd like you to tag along."

O-oh... Is, is that all...? Twilight's heartbeat steadied, and her lips formed a relieved smile. "I'd be happy to, Rainbow, and... you're right—as usual. I don't know what I've been thinking... I, I guess spending all this time here, cooped up alone most of the day must've affected my mood more than I thought..."

"So... does that mean I can go ahead and stash this someplace we don't have to look at it?" Rainbow asked with a hopeful look.

Twilight rolled her eyes, nodding her head. "Sure, Dash, sure... You win."

"Yes!" Rainbow cheered, victorious, and leaped up from the couch. Twilight herself, watched as her friend took it between her hooves, and flew over to a storage cabinet on the far left of the room, placing it on the first shelf she could, before shutting the cabinet door behind her triumphantly.

"There. Out of sight, out of mind."

I suppose it's for the best, Twilight mused, her friend flying back on over to rejoin her on the couch. "I'll, uhm... be sure to message Cadance sometime this week, letting her know."

"Maaan... I can already tell this week is starting to look up."

"Here's hoping," agreed Twilight, shouldering the idea as she went for a slice of pizza.

"H-hey, save some for me, Twilight! I haven't even eaten yet, and you've already like, polished off half of it!"

"Nhut chrue," she argued with a mouthful.

Rainbow stared back at her incredulously.

"Uh, yes true," she argued, before both her and Twilight broke out in a soft bout of laughter.

The two talked with one another well into the evening, an orange glow softly filtering in through the windows opposite them from the setting sun.

Rainbow arched her back, giving her forelegs a tired stretch before slouching forward.

"Man... I think it's time for me to hit the hay..." She turned to her friend. "What about you, Twilight?"

"Now that you mention it, I guess I do feel a little sleepy... I suppose if you're going to bed, then... I may as well grab a little shuteye too."

"Hey now, don't turn in on my behalf."

"I-I'm not, I—!"

"Kidding! I'm only teasing, Twilight."

"Hmph."

Rainbow chuckled, getting up from her seat. "Good night, Twilight."

As she trotted for the stairs, she looked back over her shoulder, one final time with a soft smile. She lifted her hoof as if to say goodbye, Twilight returning the gesture, and before she knew it, soon found herself slowly losing consciousness under the growing weight of her own eyelids.