//------------------------------// // X- Forgive, Not Forget // Story: To Find Purpose // by The REAL Mister Pkmn //------------------------------// After a few hours of working at the stall, Applejack had let me quit for the day. I wandered off, determined to find Ferris, and at least speak with him. I walked for some time, going towards the one place I could get some information- Twilight’s library. As I drew close, I found myself subconsciously dragging my heels a bit. After all, part of me really wasn’t keen on doing this. Still, it had to be done. I made my way to that peculiar oak and went inside. The look of it was just about what I had expected, considering that this was still a library- even if it was inside a tree. I was lucky enough to see that Twilight was there- but Ferris wasn’t anywhere in sight. I gave a sigh, and made my way over to her. She had her nose in some book- couldn’t care less for the title- but she turned my way when I cleared my throat. She perked up slightly, and spoke. “Oh, Nate! I-” I glared as I cut her off. “You don’t get to call me that. We aren’t friends. Only my friends get to call me that.” I shook my head as I took a moment to calm down. “Look. I’m here to find Ferris. Any idea where he meandered off to?” She was slightly disheartened, but shook it off with a sigh. “He said that he had something to take care of. Said he needed a wide open space, so I suggested Whitetail Woods. It’s off to the south west, can’t miss it.” I gave a nod. “Thanks.” I made to leave, but turned to face her before I left, a serious look on my face. “Don’t. Follow. This matter is between the two of us.” An understanding look was upon her face, and she gave a nod. “I promise that I won’t interfere- I’ll let the girls know that you want to be left alone-” I coughed slightly. “DON’T SAY IT LIKE THAT!” I shook my head, and gave sleight apologetic glance towards her. “Sorry. It’s just… If you say it that way, people might get the wrong idea.” I sighed. “If you must tell them, tell them that this is just a chat between two former friends.” I turned back towards the door. “This matter doesn’t concern them.” I left through the door before Twilight could occupy my attention any further. I kept out of the way of the ponies as my thoughts drifted. Why had I blown up like that? I hadn’t gotten that loud about anything in a long time. So why now? Were the ponies really that good at getting under my skin? Or was I just not as composed as I used to be? Or maybe it was just a bad day. That was always possible, certainly. I took my time to sort my thoughts as I made my way to the location that Twilight had told me about. What would I say? What should I say? How would I say it? How should it be said? I shook my head. Thinking on it wasn’t helping, it only was making it worse. As I found myself outside the woods, I took a deep breath… and let the thoughts drift away. If this was to be done… It had to be in the moment, just like when I made conversation with Ophi for the first time. I released the breath as I calmed myself. With new direction, I made my way into the woods. It took some time, but I did eventually find a clearing. Just by my luck I found Ferris. He was practicing Taiquondo, all on his own. That brought back memories. I gave a slight chuckle. “Been a while since I’ve seen how bad your form is. I mean come on! Have I taught you nothing?” He turned to face me, and dropped the stance. “You came to find me… does this mean…?” I gave an exhausted sigh. “Listen. This… isn’t easy, you know.” I gestured to him, and shook my head. “I never thought you would come back. Never thought I’d have to confront what you did ever again. I thought that I could bury you, and leave you never to be found again… yet here you are.” I looked away as my arm dropped. “Four years. You would think that in that amount of time, something would change. That It would be simple. That I could just… let go. I don’t think I can, not entirely. …Not yet, anyway.” Ferris gave me a confused look. “So what, you just will keep hating me forever? I said that I was sorry, right? I even explained myself at your request! What else do you want?” “Time.” He looked even more confused. “I’m sorry, what was that?” I looked him in the eye. “I need time.” I sighed. "Ferris... I... forgive you, partly. I can't say that I still won't resent you a little, but... I will try and keep that in check. We're both stuck here now, so we might as well not have bad blood between us if we are to wait out the time until we can get back home." I looked away. “It will take time for me to fully forgive you, to let it all go. That’s why I’m saying this now. I can’t say how long it might take, but…” I turned, giving a sad smile. “I’ll try to let it be, as best I can.” Ferris met my gaze, and stared at me for a moment. “You’re not joshing me, are you? Are you really serious about this?” I gave a nod and recited. “Cross my heart. Hope to die, stick a needle in my eye.” I felt better when I saw that he’d accepted my promise, but I put up my guard reflexively when he reached his hand out. I stepped back. “I can’t.” Ferris looked at me, perplexed. “Can’t what?” I shook my head, stepping back further. “ I can’t be your friend again. It’s…” I sighed, “I can’t go through that with you again. Not now, not ever. Just…” I turned away. “Just let it die.” I walked off, at first. Then I broke into a run. I couldn’t risk it. I had no clue of where I was going, but I didn’t care right then. I had to get away from him. I couldn’t cross that bridge again. I couldn’t trust Ferris again. It was too risky, too painful. I don’t know how long I was running. By the time I was winded, I was deep in a much different forest. The sun had set, and the moon was going up in the sky. I didn’t know where I was, but I didn’t care. I took a moment to collect my breath. This place was far different from the woods. The trees looked gnarled and twisted, beyond what was considered normal back home. I was far from the town, as far as I knew. I looked around, trying to find a path of dirt road in the dark. It was easier for me than it likely would be for somebody else, given that I sometimes liked to stay up late. I was familiar with what things looked like in the dark, so I hardly stumbled as I wove my way through the trees in a random direction. It was a shame that I didn’t have a compass, but I seemed to be doing considerably well. I soon noticed a light, and decided to follow it. It took a few more minutes of walking, but I did find a dirt path that wasn’t covered in grass. I looked around, and saw that I had stumbled near a shack in this forest. I decided that it couldn’t hurt to ask the resident of the place for directions back to town. I went up to the door, and knocked. It took hardly any time at all for the resident to respond, and come to the door. Though, what surprised me is that it was a zebra. Sure, it was a bit more gray compared to ones back home, but it was a zebra. I shook off the initial shock, and spoke to the zebra. “Sorry to disturb you at this late hour, but I’m a bit… lost. Do you know which way it is back to Ponyville?” The zebra blinked, and took in my look before responding. Judging for the voice, it was a mare. “You ask if I know how to get back there, the way? Walk on this path you see, and don’t stray. Though I must say it is odd for one like you to be welcome there. Though I look more like them I am not welcome, quite unfair…” I paused before making my way. She had helped me, so it was only fair… I sighed, inwardly cursing my insistence on paying debts. “I’ll see what I can do about that. See you around, I guess.”I walked off, trying not to dwell on it too much. I followed the dirt path for quite a ways, at a slight jog. It wasn’t long before I found my way back to the small town, and the sight I found back there was a bit surprising. Ophi was there, as was Ferris and Miara- though, I wasn’t quite sure why she was. Twilight and here friends were there too, which was only slightly less surprising. Ophi came up towards me, and slapped me across the face. I grasped the place that she had, and looked to see her eyes full of tears. She yelled at me. “What were you thinking!?” I sighed, as I looked away. “I just… panicked. You know how I am about rebuilding bridges I thought bunt, Ophi. I just… couldn’t handle it.” I looked her in the eye, and gently wiped away the tears with my hand. “I’m sorry if I worried you. I wasn’t thinking rationally. I’ll try and ensure that it won’t happen again.” All of a sudden, I found myself wrapped in her arms. She cried into my shoulder. “Don’t do that to me. You’re my best friend. If I lost you…” I gave a sigh. Of course it meant nothing more than that. I lightly pat her on the back. “It’s alright. I’d never leave you. You know that.” I pulled myself away before I did something I might’ve regretted. I looked towards Ferris. “Look, I…” He held up his hand. “It’s alright. I get it. You don’t think you can trust me ever again. I get ya. I won’t push you back into it. It’s just, in the moment, I…” He sighed. “It’s good to see that you’re alright, anyway.” Miara looked at me, a bit curious. “So, how did you get back from the Everfree? From what Twilight’s friends have told us of it, it wouldn’t be easy…” I chuckled. “Actually, somebody has a shack in the forest. She told me how to get back.” I then gave a judgemental look towards Twilight and her friends. “She also mentioned that even though she’s more like you than I am, you accepted me and not her. What’s that about? Just ‘case she’s a zebra, you judge her? Reminds me of an issue some people have back home…” Twilight gasped. “A zebra! I haven’t heard anything about this…” She turned towards her friends. “Is there really a zebra in the Everfree?” Her friends looked between one another, a bit confused. Pinkie spoke up first. “But Zecora’s supposed to be some kind of evil enchantress, according to rumors…” Applejack nodded. “That’s what Ah heard ‘bout her too. But maybe those rumors were wrong? After all, ponies ‘round here do love their gossip…” Rarity looked at me. “You say she gave you directions out?” I gave a nod, and held up my hand with three fingers extended next to each other, and a fist to my chest. “Scout’s honor. She seemed rather upset about not being able to get into town without judgement, based on what I can glean.” Rainbow huffed lightly. “So what are we supposed to do, then? It’s hard to say if ponies will listen and give her a chance…” Fluttershy shivered, meek words coming out barely audible. “O-oh, I hope that we can do this…” She turned to look at me. “What should we do?” I gave a confident smirk. “Leave that to me.” I looked at the sky. “Though, it probably should wait until morning. Preferably before Ophi and I go off to find out if there are humans over near Manehattan.” I looked at Ferris and Miara, a hesitant expression on my face. “You two have plans then, or…?” Ferris nodded. “I promised that I would help keep the library organized tomorrow. You two go off without me.” Miara looked uncertain. “I think I want at least one more day in this town before I go off someplace new. I think I’ll help Rarity while you two are off tomorrow.” Part of me was relieved and elated; I would have more time with Ophi on my own. The other part was nervous, almost wishing that somebody else would come along so I would be a bit more distracted from my feelings for Ophi. I didn’t let on to anyone how conflicted I was feeling, though. I instead played it off as if nothing was wrong. “I see. Well, maybe next time.” I gave them all a once-over and turned to leave. “Well, it’s getting late. I best be off.” I raised a hand without looking back as I wandered off towards the farm. “See you in the morning, I guess.” I knew that Applejack had followed; this was her home, after all. I made my way to the barn, and she called out to me. “Dinner’s on the table, Nathan. You coming?” I gave a sigh, and shook off my tiredness. I followed her inside the house, and found my plate still at the table even though the others had all eaten. It was stacked with a few things that they seemed to remember me eating before, and I gave a light chuckle before digging in. I took my time, as I was rather tired. After finishing, I remembered to grab my clothes from the drying rack in the back. They were a bit cold, but that was fine. I grabbed them all in arm, and lugged them back through the house and into the barn. I opened my wardrobe with my foot, and set the clothes down temporarily. I then set about folding them over the clothes rod, aside from my pajamas. I made sure that the barn door was shut, and changed into my pajamas. I first pulled out my notepad and pencil. I hadn’t used them today…  I rolled up the clothes that I had worn that day and placed them in the top drawer for the wardrobe. I decided to rectify the grievous error before trying to get to sleep. I sat down near the blanket and propped open my notepad onto its second page. I grasped my pencil, and started to draw what I could remember from the forest. I let my hand guide me, as it always did. After a few good minutes, it was complete. A full landscape of where Zecora’s shack was in the forest, with a decent amount of surrounding area. I nodded, and shut my notepad and put it away in the bottom drawer of the wardrobe. I took the blanket in hand, and tried to lay down to sleep. Yet, I couldn’t seem to shut my eyes. I was tired enough for it, but… something was keeping me up. I tried to speak to Ophi in my mind. Hey, are you still up? I heard an audible sigh on her end, with confirmation. Yeah. I can’t get to sleep either. I guess it’s partly the excitement of the day, and partly what we might find tomorrow. I could almost feel her shifting about. Do you think you might find somebody else that used to be your friend in Manehattan? Could it be that we will find all of your old pals? I shook my head. I don’t think so. Only so many openings to our world opened up, Ophi. Sure, we might find one or two others, but the chances of finding them all is nigh impossible. After all, back in before I got my glasses, I was friends with practically half of my peers. I paused and gave a deep sigh. ...I was a very different person back then. For a while, I thought she had dropped the conversation and went to bed. But then, I heard her a gain. Maybe it’s not just yours, then. Maybe… some of mine are here, too. It would be nice, getting a chance to reconnect with some of my old friends… I chuckled in my head. Always the optimist, eh Ophi? I then considered something. You know, you never have told me many specifics about any of your old friends. What were they like? What drove you apart? She gave a yawn. I’m too tired to answer right now. Maybe on the train ride there, okay? See you in the morning… I could feel her drift off, and I gave a sigh. I gave a yawn of my own, and felt that there really was not much keeping me up now. I laid down, and drifted off. Meanwhile, near Manehattan… A figure runs off into the night, and comes up near a cave. The figure goes inside, and pulls the makeshift door shut with the help of another figure. The first figure exhales sharply as it sets down a sack. The second figure presses a button, and a flashlight lights the area. The first figure is a girl of about 17, with long black hair and hazel eyes. She is garbed in a purple tunic, dark gray leggings and midnight blue slippers. The second figure is a young man of about 18, with short orange hair and brown eyes. He is clothed in a brown tank top, black pants and dark red sneakers. The girl spoke. “I don’t like this, Eric. What we’re doing, it’s-” Eric crossed his arms and huffed. “Would you rather us starve, Rena? Our supply ran out days back! We don’t exactly have many options, given that our position isn’t ideal for hunting or gathering in the wild.” He gave a large sigh. “Besides. I told you before, right? We’ll pay them back. We’re not stealing, just borrowing until we can pay them properly.” Rena looked downcast. “Still feels like stealing.” She did pep up a little, though. “Though I did hear some of the ponies talking. Apparently, we aren’t the only humans in this land. If I heard right, they fell into a town known as… Ponyville.” Eric raised an eyebrow. “Fellow people…” He cracked a smile. “Well now, that is rather good news. Maybe with their help, we can get out of this forsaken place.” Rena sighed. “I know that you don’t like it here, but… I don’t think that’s very nice. Maybe you should give the locals a chance? It might help your attitude…” A shake of the head came from Eric. “Pointless, Rena. Why bother, when we’re just gonna say goodbye later? Better to not get attached to anyone that isn’t from home.” Rena sighed, and shook her head. “You really are a piece of work, you know?” She reached into the sack and pulled out her spoils: a fruit basket. “Dinner’s on. Pick what you want.” Eric gave a shrug, and plucked out a banana. He peeled it as Rena went for an apple. He chuckled. “I honestly don’t know how you do it, Rena. Can’t be easy, raiding those houses.” Rena took a bite out of the apple, refusing to comment. He shook his head. “Ah, fine. Don’t take the compliment.” He took a bite and swallowed a bit before continuing. “Though, It won’t be like this for much longer. Once those other people find us, we can finally have a way out of this situation.” Rena shook her head as she finished up her apple. “I bet that they’ll reprimand us for what we’ve resorted to. I wouldn’t blame them, either.” She gave a dark chuckle. “I wonder if they’ll put us in jail for that…” Eric scoffed. “They’ll understand, Rena. We’re in dire straights.” He sighed and looked away. “Though, I could understand if they leave us here for a bit to clean up this mess that we’ve wound up in…” A silence fell between the two of them as they focused on finishing their meal. They weren’t very comfortable around each other, not since they resorted to “borrowing” to stay alive. It was only a recent development, since their supply ran out about two nights ago. Still, Rena could tell that even though Eric was putting up a front, it didn’t exactly sit well with him either. Rena knew also that Eric could tell that despite the arguing, Rena understood that this was what had to be done for now. After dinner, Rena grabbed her pajamas from her backpack. She went into the back room of the cave and pulled the shower curtain that they had installed closed so she could change in privacy. As she did, her thoughts wandered. Other people… who could be out there? Strangers? Enemies? ...Old friends that I miss? At that though, she gave a sigh. Ophelia… I’m sorry that I never got to say goodbye. I wish that… that we could meet again, so that we can catch up. Maybe talk about old times, too. She shook her head. It wasn’t good for her to get her hopes up. After she changed into her pajamas, she got out of the alcove. Eric was there outside the room, and he saw the look on her face. “Thinking about Ophelia again, huh? So many words unsaid, stuff like that, right?” She never understood how Eric could read her so well. They had only met when the two of them met by chance at the mall, and yet now they were in this mess together. Maybe it was a bit of wishful thinking, but she thought that he might like her. Then again, it was hard to tell, given the way he acted. Still she gave a small nod and answered. “Yeah. It’s been five years since I had to move away. There are so many things that I wish I could have done. I wish that I could have told her. I’ve always regretted that.” Eric placed a hand on Rena’s shoulder. “You can’t change the past, Rena. You can only influence the future. Who knows? Maybe she is one of the other people here? If that is the case, you may very well get your wish.” Rena’s eyes went wide. “Do you think so? Oh, that would be a dream come true!” Eric shrugged as he removed his hand from her shoulder. “It’s possible, sure. It’s also possible that she isn’t here at all.” At her downtrodden look, he chuckled. “Hey now, don’t give me that look. You know that I mean well. You know that I don’t have many friends. So I just like to play with expectations a little, that’s all. Forgive me?” She chuckled and shook her head. “You are forgiven. Just don’t go doing that again, kay?” He gave her a thumbs-up as he went past her into the alcove. Rena went over to her sleeping bag, giving a silent yawn. Things had been hard for them lately, but that was likely to change soon. She just had to believe that Ophelia was out there, and that she would find her. With these thoughts to comfort her, Rena allowed herself to finally drift off to sleep after her long day.