//------------------------------// // He Stays Somewhere - Applejack - Part 01 // Story: Begone, Horse! // by Snek Eyes //------------------------------// As Anon approached the mess formerly known as his place, he saw a familiar green and purple dragon there. "What's up, Spike?!" "Sup." He nodded his head up. "I got nothing going on, so I'll help you today as well." Tears started welling up in Anon's eyes. "This boi. Thanks, my dude." He tried to wipe them away, with half success. "They aren't tears. Just eye juice." "Suuure." *** Like last time, they started going through the rubble. But the question hung in the air like Chester Whinnington. "So how was Fluttershy's?" "Oh THERE it is! I knew it." Anon sighed before turning back to the wood. "Very nice. She was pleasant to be around." "Nice. So what happened?" "Not... too much." Spike walked to Anon and grabbed his muzzle, forcing their eyes to meet. "Hm... So what happened?" Anon's eyes darted left and right before settling back on Spike's. "Homie, if I tell you, can you keep it more secret and secure than Area 51?" "How many alien cheeks in there we clapping?" "Bongo cat levels of clapping." Wonder filled Spike's stare. "Now, give me the summary." Anon sat down. "Ahem." His voice was a whisper at this point. "She massaged me-" "Happy ending?" "No!" Anon said with a blush. "Then somehow, she was sleeping on the couch, but when I woke up in her bed, she was with me-" "You two cuddled?" "That's the thing! I don't know, man. And then I made her some breakfast, took care of her animals, and massaged her as thanks. Then she fell asleep, and I came here, and you know the rest." "So you know what I heard from all of that?" Anon's ears focused on the midget in front of him. "What?" "She's a like button." "...Wha?" "Because you should SMASH HER!!!" To accentuate his point, Spike stomped on a piece of wood. "Fluttershy gave you her bed to sleep in? She doesn't do that, even with her friends! She massaged you?! She only does that to her animals, not PONIES!" Spike inhaled before continuing. "And she let you massage HER? She could've broken your hoof! Hell, you relaxed her enough for her to fall back asleep! Once Fluttershy is up, SHE'S UP!" Spike threw a plank on the ground in front of him, which splintered and hit Anon in several places. Anon recoiled. "Ah..." "SHE'S ALSO A VIRGIN!" "Spike! STOP! SHUT UP!" Anon did what was essentially an angery boop with intent to silence. And that's what Spike did. He took a breath and sat down. "Sorry. I've been stressed because of shit going on in the castle, and the school, and just... so much shit." He took one more deep breath before he stood up and put his claw out. "We cool?" "Sure. I get it." Anon and Spike shook and nodded. "Next time, just talk about it. Don't be throwing stuff." "Yeah. Sorry." The two went back to clearing out wood. "But seriously. She likes you, and based on what you said, more than the usual like." "That'll take a bit to settle for me. But thanks, Spike. I appreciate your input, even if it was... heated." The sound of trotting was off in the distance, but approaching ever so slightly. "Hey, Anon!" And the voice hinted at a drawl. "I need your help!" "Oh great..." Anon focused on the orange pony coming towards him. "What's up, Applejack?" "Hey. So Big Mac is sick, and the Crusaders' Treehouse is falling apart a bit, and I have to get back to apple bucking, so can ya help me out?" "...So what part do you need me to help with?" "If you could do the Treehouse, it's just a few planks on the roof, I'd mighty appreciate it." "On the roof? Got a ladder?" "Yup!" "Spike, thanks for the help. See you!" Anon started walking off with Applejack. "I got it." "Aw, thanks, Anon!" Applejack wrapped a hoof around Anon's neck. "Applejack, withdraw that hoof or suffer a broken muzzle again. Your choice." *** The sun was setting as Anon walked back to the house. "Hey, Applejack. The treehouse is fixed up- what's that smell?" "Apple fritters! And other stuff for dinner!" Applejack once again walked up to Anon and wrapped a hoof around him. "Thanks for fixing the treehouse up." Anon just grabbed her leg and took it off from around him. "Now Applejack, what did I say earlier?" "Okay..." She put out her bottom lip in a weak pout. "I'm just trying to show how much I appreciate the help." "So just, I don't know, say thanks like you did a few sentences ago? No hugging, please." "Thanks." "You're welcome." Anon was walking towards the door. "And just where do you think you're going?" "...Home." "Ain't your home just a pile of sticks and stones now?" "...Well, still, I'm going. Have a good night-" As Anon was leaving, his soon-to-be path was blocked. "Hey sis- Who the fuck is this?!" "APPLEBLOOM! THE FUCK DID I SAY ABOUT CURSING, NOW?!" "I can say whatever I want now! I'm finally not a damn foal!" "It ain't about being a foal or not, it's manners, you ungrateful piece of shit! Ya just don't curse around strangers because it isn't a good first impression!" Applebloom nodded in a direction. "Who the fuck is that stallion over there? Your soon-to-be boyfriend?" "No, that's Anon, the one who fixed up your treehouse!" The blush didn't lie, though. "...Treehouse? Ya still think we use that piece of shit?" *Bonk* "Ow!" *Bonk* "The hell?! OW!" "Shut your mouths, BOTH of you." Anon walked back from the two, leaving them to rub their heads from his aggressive bops. "You wanna get physical, Anon? I'll kick your ass!" Applebloom raised her voice. The next thing she knew, she was outside on her very sore haunches. "OW! How do you do that!" "There. Now I kicked YOUR ass LITERALLY. Applebloom, take a walk and cool off. Come back when you're good." "Who do you think you are to kick me out of my own house?" "I'm Anon." He started walking towards Applebloom, who noped out of there real quick. "Thank ya much, Anon. You have no idea how much trouble she's been since she started maturing." "Sure thing. How long has she been trouble?" "The last few weeks. She's started listening to this awful music that you can't even understand the lyrics to, and when you do understand the lyrics, it sounds like shit still!" "What did you just say about swearing around strangers?" Applejack remembered, then took a moment to reflect. "What music?" "What are they called, Wings of Saturn? I don't get it at all..." Anon turned towards the door. "Oh, really." "Anyways, dinner's up!" "Itadakimasu!*" *** After dinner and a bath, Anon was once again heading towards the door. "Still going home?" "Yup. I just feel like I've been here long enough. Any longer, and I might start to feel bad." "Nonsense. We have a spare bed. Besides, it's just one night. No harm." "Jeez, this again," Anon muttered to himself. "If you're fine with it." "Aaabsolutely!" "Ok. Show me da wae." Anon came back up the stairs, and Applejack led da wae to da queen. "This one right here." For a moment, Chrysalis seemed to be there, but that must have been a false queen. Also, when Anon entered the room, Applejack followed. "...Yes, Applejack?" "What? This is my bedroom." "But you said I would be in the spare bedroom." "Never said that. Just said we have one." "...Celestia damn it." In Canterlot, Celestia sneezed before Luna said, "Shut up, sister. I'm concentrating." "So what? You want to cuddle tonight, Applejack? Go at it like you did apple bucking today?" "I don't the energy to go that far today. Maybe the cuddling would be nice, though." "No cuddling. If we're in the same bed, we have to have pillows between us, and we're facing different directions. Got it?" "Are ya that afraid of physical contact?" "No. I just don't want to cuddle with a pony I barely know." Applejack scoffed before giving in. "Fine, fine. I'll get the pillows from the spare bed." As she left, Anon watched her intently. Once she was gone from view, he let his breath he had held in. "Dat ass."