//------------------------------// // Letter 79 // Story: Dear Princess Sunbutt // by 2Merr //------------------------------// Dear Princess Mighty Whitey, Today I showed how small my brain is by trying to disprove Anon's proposed link between dumbness and purpleness. According to observable reality, the more purple the body, the smaller the brain will be, excluding cases where the purple is artificial.  I first attempted to present a counterpoint by bringing up Spike, who is clearly purple, but not dumb. This just served to weaken my argument by revealing my own ignorance of the fact that only ponies have shown a consistent dumb-purple correlation.  My second attempt involved me trying to convince my other friends that brain size is not an accurate measure of intelligence. I got everyone to take a brain scan, which revealed an unhealthy amount of wrinkles in my brain. I then made the claim that people who have small, wrinkly brains are generally more intelligent than people with bigger, less wrinkly brains. This was clearly a desperate ploy to defend my small brain by claiming the wrinkles made me smart. I even pretended to have “sources,” which were really medical journals any random nobody could have written.  Only Shyfly and the Drama Llama believed me. Flapjack didn't trust the machine because it wasn't an Apple product, Pinkeye was too busy trying to get scans of her alligator, and Rainmare said I was lying because she's smart even though her brain looked smoother than your ass. Despite the overwhelming evidence in support of the dumb-purple correlation, I’m still in denial because my brain is too small to comprehend it all. Perhaps one day I’ll be as smart and handsome as Anon, but science is still a long way away from that. Your wrinkly brainlet,  Dumb and Purple