Dedicated to Vinicio Simón Suárez.
Special thanks to proofreader McClaw!
The sunset was beautiful, worthy of the two entities who made it possible. It was the perfect balance between the higher and lower forces charged with advancing time. On one count, the sun was dim, ready to get to sleep. On the other, the moon was waking up, ready to do her work.
It was under these conditions that Beezy, also known as Mom, watched from the heights to observe the lives she was most proud about having created. The ponies had changed physically and in attitude, but never in values and principles. To wit: the air of absolute happiness going through the massive terrains of Sweet Apple Acres. Beezy is still amazed at the ease with which the ponies rebuilt their lives so fast. Who wouldn’t be?
Dozens of multi-colored miniature horses, with curious symbols on their rumps which represented each one’s special talent, relentlessly worked picking apples from the trees on the massive field, property of the Apple family for generations. Some would kick the trees so that the apples would fall off, while others, pulling wagons, would wait for the apples to fall into them, so they could bring them to the barn where draft stallion Big Macintosh, his middle sister Applejack, and Granny Smith supervised.
For a while, nothing strange had happened in the magical realm of Equestria, home of the ponies. For quite a long time, there had been no attacks from weird creatures, or conflicts, or anything out of the ordinary, except for the few times when Derpy Hooves, a slightly clueless pegasus pony, was flying upside down without noticing and then she needed help to get back upright. That’s how Equestria had been since its foundation; that today’s afternoon was like that, as well, was absolutely refreshing for a change. From what legends tell, this is how the Equestrians’ ancestors’ lives had been in another time, although it seems this didn’t last.
Not to mention the excellent comradeship the Apples exhibited at work. They helped each other without condition, no matter their age (and some were older than even Granny Smith!) and always respected each other’s opinions. For the icing on the cake, what better than watching Apple Bloom, Applejack and Big Macintosh’s little sister, playing with her friends Scootaloo the pegasus and Sweetie Belle the unicorn? No one would have thought of something as nasty as ruining their fun. Not a chance!
Things were about to change…
“Ah, those were th' good ol’ days!” Granny Smith said. “Ah remember when nothin’ ever happened here… no monsters, no friends fighting over silly things, none a’ that! Ah wish we could go back t’those times, t’least fer a while…”
“Don’t ya’ll get too sappy, huh, Granny?” said Applejack. “Nowadays, they call ya horrible things if ya so much as think 'bout sayin' any good things about when ya was little, or th’ past in general! You of all ponies oughtta know that. Am ah right, Big Mac?”
“Eeeyup,” he replied. “Thirty million years, made instan’ly worthless. Ah still find it highly ‘ffensive t’ this day, but nothin’ we can do.” Big Macintosh appeared to be the smartest of the three, because his vocabulary was a bit more sophisticated. In fact, all Apples had the same education, thanks to their studies in the kindergarten run by Ms. Cheerilee’s family, but Big Mac had taken his books more seriously. To each their own.
“If only they dinn',"” replied Granny. “Oh, but ponies are hard t’ change opinion… and anyway, ah’ve lived here for so long. Ah wouldn’t dare change anythin’.”
They almost didn’t notice something gigantic was casting a shadow from the sky. They looked up to see it, but only Granny immediately knew what it was.
“Aieeeee!” she screamed. “The Pony Puffs! The Pony Puffs have returned! All a you, run! Get ta safety!”
Everypony else in the family realized Granny was right. Over their heads loomed the silhouette of something that resembled a huge, flying, metallic, 17th century war galleon without masts, heading towards the mountains where the city of Canterlot, capital of the realm, stood. Everypony was soon yelling in terror and running for cover... except for one.
“What’s goin’ on? What’n the name of a thousan’ bull herds are the Puffs?” demanded Applejack.
“Right now there’s no time to explain you that!” Big Mac said. “Would ya do me a favor ‘a talk less and put th’ girls someplace safe more?”
Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle, the three little fillies, were running in circles in a fit of panic. It took some effort to get them into the barn and calm them down. Granny and the rest of the senior adults prayed to Beezy and even Eleff, imploring that nothing happened to them, that everything worked out fine in the end.
Applejack, herself, always preferred actions before words. Before begging for salvation, she would rather run away in search of the only pony who could solve the problem.
And she met her along the way. She was walking along the streets of Ponyville, the town where they all lived, with four other ponies. These specific six ponies, which they lovingly called “The Mane Six”, were mutual friends.
“Twilight! Somethin’s up, and nopony wants ta tell me—Hey, ya brought the others?”
“Yes, I did,” said Twilight Sparkle, a unicorn. “We’re facing a life or death situation here. There is an elevated probability that the Puffs will invade.”
“Aha, an’ what’re th’ Puffs?” asked Applejack again.
“It seems they’re a breed of evil ponies which have attempted to take over Equestria for years. Their leader is a Pony Puff Princess.”
“Wait, wait a minute!” interrupted Pinkie Pie, another earth pony. “Princess? An evil princess? That's impossible! How can there be an evil princess? I didn’t know princesses could be evil! I thought all princesses were good!” she said quickly and so loudly that those who weren't part of their conversation ended up hearing it. “This is way too freaky! I don’t get it…”
“Well, Pinkie, darling,” said Rarity, another unicorn, “I have seen more than one spoiled moneybags acting as if she was a princess. It’s not exactly ‘evil,’ but… it’s awfully close.”
“Guess which six of us have a mission to kick the Puff Princess and company’s keisters into next week?” said pegasus Rainbow Dash braggingly.
“Not yet, Rainbow,” Twilight reminded her. “We still don’t know their intentions. There’s a chance that this might not be an invasion, so we must not act without being certain.”
“One thing we’re certain about… they’re scary,” said pegasus Fluttershy in a very low voice.
“Stuff your opinion, Fluttershy,” said Rainbow Dash. She wasn’t trying to insult her friend, but she couldn’t stand her ‘lack of awesomeness’, what she called not being as daring and fearless as her. “You think everything is scary? Twilight, now that I think about it, you sure all six of us gotta go? Cause I don’t think…”
“Whatever is bothering you about Fluttershy's character flaws is at this time irrelevant, Rainbow,” said Twilight. “I’m afraid, right now, we have other things to worry about.”
“Can we finish keepin’ an eye on them Puffs?” said Applejack, impatient. “Mah family is more upset than a cow in'a middle'a field o’ snakes! Th’ sooner we find out what them Puffs want here, the sooner th' fam'll calm down and th’ sooner they'll finish buckin’ th’ rest o’ the apples! Them trees don't buck themselves, ya know? We gotta finish buckin’, and we gotta finish buckin' right now!"
“Good idea,” Twilight acknowledged. “Let’s all be alert now for any suspicious activity."
They turned around in the direction of the flying metal galleon. It seemed to be doing nothing wrong; it was still approaching the palace with no apparent hostile intentions.
Suddenly… firing! Yes, firing!
“GOSH! Did you see that?”
“Wait for you there, girls,” Rainbow Dash said. “I’ve been dying to laugh in the face of danger for a bit!”
And she zoomed away to the palace, not showing the slightest fear -or the slightest care-. The rest (even Fluttershy, who felt too embarrassed and self-conscious to fly) followed by land.
The galleon was in fact no less than a flying battle cruiser, the kind you'd see in one of those science fiction comic books, sustained in the air by an unknown power source and armed with laser cannons. Its crew was all Puffs, and they were attacking Canterlot Palace! The cannons fired colorful laser beams and blew holes on the walls, through which soldier Puffs wearing jetpacks invaded to attack the Royal Guard and other innocent ponies with plasma rifles set for low damage. Unlike ponies, which could be female or male, unicorns, pegasi or earthies, all Puffs were female, and none were unicorns or pegasi; they were all earth. The Equestrian Royal Guard was there to defend their palace, but while the Puffs didn’t surpass them in number, they did in firepower.
The inside of the ship's command bridge looked like a mix between a nuclear submarine's command bridge and a science lab. In the center there was a captain's chair on which sat a Puff; tall, thin, and frankly ugly, with a long face, a green jewel on her forehead and a mouth which housed a set of big horse teeth. This Puff, General Rinse N. Spit, was evidently the ship’s captain, because she was giving orders to the other Puffs, her bridge crew.
“All artillery, FIRE! Destroy the walls! But remember, your orders are to kill nopony! I want them conscious!”
The face of a Puff suddenly materialized before General Rinse N. Spit; a Puff that looked like an evil version of Fluttershy, had pink coat and yellow hair, and resembled a pig more than a horse. This was the Pony Puff Princess herself, and she expected the General to tell her how the battle was going. Despite none of them being unicorns, some Puffs had magical powers like those of unicorn Equestrians; the Puff Princess could use her own to broadcast her face and communicate with her underlings from a great distance.
“Ah, our Princess…! The capture of Canterlot Palace is now well underway! Soon it will be ours!”
“Excellent job, General Spit,” the Puff Princess answered in a voice that sounded also like an evil version of Fluttershy’s whispers. “As soon as you do, make sure to block and keep good watch over all exits. I want nothing getting in or out of that Palace!”
“So it shall be, our Princess! The Palace will be completely sealed by the time of your arrival!”
“I hope so, General. Don’t forget as well that I wish to be sure I won't have… competition, so to speak.”
“The Royal Sisters?”
“Exactly. Do not harm them, but lock them up, and make sure nopony makes a rescue attempt… not even themselves!”
“As you wish, oh, our Princess,” General Spit praised. The Puff Princess' face disappeared, and the general addressed her crew when the Puff Princess’ face was no longer visible. “You heard her! You will comply or I will personally wring your necks!”
She rubbed her hooves in satisfaction. It seemed too good to be true, like some kind of dream, but it was a reality; after so many years, they would finally own Equestria… and the world!
To the Puffs, this was the battle of their lives. Years of training had brought them here, to their final victory against the Equestrian ponies. The Royal Guard tried their best at making a stand, but it wasn't enough. The Puffs captured the Palace in the blink of an eye and took plenty of prisoners.
The great throne room’s ceiling was blown to pieces, and more Puffs came in through, to make prisoners of the Royal Sisters, winged unicorns Celestia and Luna. Normally, Celestia of the Sun would have gone to sleep while Luna of the Moon took her place (by day, Luna slept and Celestia ruled), but the emergency needed both of them awake at once. The Princesses posed a bit of resistance too, but the Puffs eventually subdued them.
The Puff Princess herself then showed up, to mock the Royal Sisters to their face. She, like most of her breed, was indistinguishable from a common pony, save for being a lot chubbier, and having thinner legs and a more protuding snout.
“Celestia, my dear,” she mocked. “Have I mentioned my dislike of you today?”
“Puff Princess, this is an act of war.”
“You don’t say, you fickle little nitwit! Everything’s an act of war to you, no?”
“Silence!” Luna exclaimed, angered. “I won’t allow you to talk like that to my sister! I warn you, one more offense and…”
“Would somepony shut up this premature old coot?” demanded the Puff Princess. One of her Puffs forcibly covered Luna’s mouth with her hoof.
“I’ve always pitied you, Celestia,” the Puff Princess continued. “All my life I’ve been ashamed of this habit of yours, of preaching about the virtues of love and friendship towards non-ponies. That a pony by worthy birthright, such as you, could ever think love and friendship towards non-ponies will get her far in life… Frankly, it sickens me.”
"You still see all creatures unlike you as inferior, Puff Princess? Can you never open your mind? Must it entertain such evil thoughts for all eternity?”
“Look who’s talking! Your mind is one-track too, Ms. Oh-How-I-Love-To-Make-Friends! When it's not thinking of blasting everypony who looks at you funny into outer space, of course!”
Luna protested again, but she came out muffled. Her mouth was still being kept shut.
“You won’t get away with this, Puff,” said Celestia. “My student Twilight Sparkle and her friends will defeat you. And even if they should fail, it is written that somepony else will succeed in the end, for good must prevail over evil. Those are the designs of Beezy. Remember my words.”
“Ah, yes, Sparkle,” the Puff Princess said, ignoring the rest. “I’ve heard a lot about her. Tell me, do you think someone like her would be a good…”
General Spit’s voice was suddenly heard as if it came from everywhere at once. “Princess! Our Princess! Intruders! They're headed in your...!”
The throne room’s doors were rammed off their hinges, and Twilight and her friends came through! They had climbed the side of the mountain on which Canterlot resided, and through the sheer magic of friendship defeated all Puffs who stood in their way. Now they had completely assimilated the power of the Elements of Harmony, which they represented, to defeat the Puff Princess once and for all!
“Sparkle, I suppose,” said the Puff Princess, unfazed, upon seeing Twilight. “Are you too going to give me a lecture on my future failure?”
“What we’re going to do is teach you manners, Puff Princess.”
“You’ve been a VERY bad girl,” said Rainbow Dash, “but don’t worry… nothing a good whopping won’t fix!” Twilight rolled her eyes at the aggressive comment.
Pinkie went on rambling very quickly and loudly, as usual. “Of course you could always surrender and then we wouldn’t have to beat you or use the Elements of Harmony against you!" she said. "And then we could be the bestest of friends ever and we’d go for walks and have fun and play hide-and-seek and hopscotch and lots of other games and I could even invite you to one of my parties! Don’t you think that’s an amazing idea? Because I think it’s an amazing idea! There’s amazing ideas I think are more amazing than others, but —“
”HERE'S WHAT I THINK OF YOUR PARTIES, AND YOUR WAY OF TALKING NONSTOP!” the Puff Princess hollered, deafening Pinkie Pie’s relentless rant.
Pinkie wasn’t upset from getting screamed at to her face, but became a little serious. Fortunately, just a little.
“That wasn’t very nice of you, Puff Princess,” she said. “Alright, girls, hit ‘er hard!”
“I like your initiative, Pinkie!” said Twilight.
The precious stones which topped the six ponies’ jewelry items gleamed with an otherworldly intensity. From said jewels, bright colored streaks were cast, forming one rainbow-colored which hit the Puff Princess… and did absolutely nothing!
The Six were shocked and confused when the Puff Princess turned up intact. They had expected the power of the Elements of Harmony to have some kind of effect on the Puff Princess, and it hadn’t even scratched her.
“Hm. Not bad, but it definitely needs a lot of being worked on. Don’t be offended, it’s constructive criticism.” Seemed as if all that came out of the Puff Princess’ lips was orders or wisecracks. “Now, it’s my turn!”
The Puff Princess fired magic beams… from her eyes! The beams hit the Six so hard they were sent flying through the wall and far off into the distance.
“Well, I’ll get to deal with them later. Now, to the dungeons with these two!”
“But, our Princess,", said one of her minions, "there’s no dungeons here…”
“No? Ah, true, Celestia,” she mocked again, “the Palace dungeons aren’t on this planet! Sorry, I had forgotten.”
Luna bit the leg blocking her mouth and nearly lunged herself against the Puff Princess, but her sister held her by the armpits.
“Luna, no! That will solve nothing. We must have faith that there will be a sensible solution.”
“Forget about that! I won’t let her insult you any longer! Let me go! I’ll finish her off!”
“Luna, settle down!” she said, and her tone made clear that she was serious. Luna calmed down on the spot; after all, she wouldn’t have been comfortable with disobeying her sister again. After what had happened a thousand years ago…
“Thanks, Cel,” mocked the Puff Princess. She closed her eyes a moment and started talking to General Spit as if she was there. No doubt, she was projecting her face magically.
Spit's voice was heard saying, “Our Princess! How did it go?”
“Perfectly, General. You’ve done a good job yourself. I’ll take it from here; for now, deploy your troops across the whole realm and allow nopony to try and escape to the borders. Each and every one of them will be subject to strict vigilance until further notice."
“Understood, our Princess. Spit out.”
The Puff Princess then addressed her lackeys again. “Lock them up… somewhere in the Palace with a bird’s eye view of the entire realm,” she ordered about the Royal Sisters. “Make sure they have no way to escape... and yes several reasons to!”