At this point, I feel compelled to remind the reader that this entire story is simply that: a story. It is a work of fiction. Despite the sheer magnitude of fourth-wall breaking that we have engaged in at the beginning of the story, none of the events described within have actually happened. No ponies, humans, or authors were harmed during the making of this story. Readers need not be alarmed by any of the potentially dangerous events described over the course of the story. None of the events of this story are real. The story--
“Get on with it!”, shouted Iron Will.
Sorry.