Dear Princess Twilight,
Well, well, well.....I have watched through a crystal ball and have seen what will come to be if I simply allow you to take over unchecked and let's just say that I am not thrilled. From what I saw, you are going to start feeding Spike steroids and he will all of a sudden have the build of a linebacker that is featured in Lyra's human books. Guess what, that ain't happening. No way in hell am I going to allow you to give your slave steroids and give him a high up position that will allow him to travel the world and try to get other creatures to get along.
Also, I'm not going to allow you to take steroids either. If this remains unchecked, YOU will also take steroids and grow to be nothing more than a re-color of me. I will not allow that to happen either because nopony other than the chosen one will ever be allowed to grow to be the same size as me. The more I look at things, the more I realize that I must intervene if I am to prevent a future I will not approve of.
To make matters worse, I saw that you gave Pinkie Pie and Cheese Sandwich a hetero marriage license and that they do indeed reproduce. Now that is completely unacceptable that you would give such a license to two ponies that I would NEVER give a license to. The more I think about it, the more I realize that it is vital that I put safeguards in place to keep you from fucking up Equestria and turning it into something that I would never allow.
I also saw that it looked like Fluttershy and Discord hooked up and got married. What will happen is you will realize Discord is still far more powerful than you and you'll be forced to hand over a hetero license to them. Another thing that troubled me was seeing Fluttershy's asshole rabbit reproducing. The fucking thing shouldn't have even lived that long, it should have wound up dead and on my dinner plate. Hell I could see you casting a longevity spell on it solely to spite everypony that has to deal with it.
And worst of all I don't like how the demographics of our country will change if I let you run things unchecked. I was ok with small numbers of other creatures coming to your school but what I saw was downright repulsive. You basically will transform Equestria into some sort of multi-cultural clusterfuck that will be a ticking time bomb just waiting for a civil war to break out or even worse, those other creatures leading a coup and overthrowing your soft, overly welcoming ass. Hell there winds up being a ton of non-ponies calling our land home and pretty much take over that school. Now that is unacceptable, completely unacceptable. I remember back when you wanted to kill griffons solely for being alive but it looks like you'll become some overly welcoming little bitch. I didn't keep Equestria stable for over a thousand years by having open borders and I'm not about to let you destroy it in less than a hundred with what will be an open borders policy. Hell I'm sure if I gazed far enough into the future you'd probably turn Equestria into a socialist hellhole where everycreature gets a basic income without working and those that work hard will get taxed into oblivion.
Now what should I do, shall my sister and I remain on the throne or should we retire and let you take over or should I put my favorite on the throne and make sure you remain a second-tier princess who simply runs a friendship school? Should I contact an incredibly powerful pony and have him give my daugh....I mean Starlight infinite powers, powers that will surpass those of Discord? You know, I might just do that! I personally think it would be very funny to get you all worked up like that.
Tell you what, I will give you a trial period of thirty days of ruling on your own and if you don't do things exactly like I would, I will see to it that you won't turn Equestria into a land where anycreature can get married, have open our borders and institute socialism. Come to think of it, I take that back. I'm contacting that powerful pony immediately so you can't screw Equestria up. I want my legacy carried on and if my favorite is the one who will see to it that my legacy is continued, I'll see to it that it happens.
Still in Charge,
Princess Celestia
To My Inferior Celestia,
Oh so you're going to go believing all the shit you see in some fucking crystal ball? How the hell do I know that somepony didn't spike your cake and you were drunk as fuck when you saw all those visions? You should know damn good and well that Discord could never stop me from making Flutterbitch my sex slave. You should also know that I would never give Pinkie a marriage license to marry her R-63 self.
Now about me going to open our borders, I do think that we should allow more creatures to move into Equestria. Yes I have been a speciesist bitch in the past but two years of running a friendship school and having other creatures save this country has helped me see that a more diverse population will make Equestria and the friendship that protects it even stronger. I think your old ways of closed borders and no actual immigration will eventually lead to our downfall.
Everything you claim to see was either a result of you being drunk, high or you are simply lying so you can find some sort of excuse to keep me from not only taking my rightful place as dictator of this shitty place but also evicting those who will cause me problems. Just wait Tia, maybe I should just turn you into my eternal sex slave instead of evicting you, well that and executing your sister, your fucking daughter and her fucking little marefriend.
Soon to Be Dictator,
Goddess-Queen Twilight Sparkle
Dear Thundercloud,
I was in touch with God-Emperor Goldner and he told me that for everything I want to be achieved, that I have to contact you. Now you see, that liar at the top did not let me ascend my daughter like he claimed he would. Now here is the thing, not only am I hoping that you could ascend Starlight Glimmer but I am also hoping that you could ascend her marefriend, Trixie Lulamoon so that they can get married and be together for all eternity.
Now I hope you can get this done before Twilight winds up taking over because she has very bad plans for all of us if we don't get this done ASAP. Let me know when you can get it done.
Sincerely,
Princess Celestia
Dear Princess Celestia,
I have been monitoring all of this for a very long time and I will be there as soon as possible. Everything you want, we will get done. After it is done, we can see to it that the transition of power will go seamlessly.
Sincerely,
Thundercloud
P.S. Summon Starlight, Trixie, Twilight and Firelight to Canterlot so that everything can be taken care of, alright?