//------------------------------// // 38. The Way Back Home // Story: Azure Edge // by Leaf Blade //------------------------------// Rainbow and Rarity made the trek back to Baltimare—the closest town to Haysead Swamp with a train station—mostly in silence, both women wrapped up in their thoughts after their encounter with the cragadile and their arguments with each other. They agreed to talk after the mission was completed, but it wasn’t until night had fallen and they were safely on the train headed back to Canterlot, sitting across from each other in a private cabin, that either felt comfortable enough to speak, and Rainbow was the first to make a move. “Um…” Rainbow was truly an expert wordsmith. “Hm?” Rarity was just as skilled. “I wanna talk about feelings and stuff now,” Rainbow tapped her fingers together and couldn’t bear to look at Rarity, “if you wanna.” “I would very much like to,” Rarity said softly, and Rainbow didn’t have to look at her to know she was smiling. “I didn’t like your joke,” Rainbow said with no small amount of hesitation, but she forced the words out cuz this was important, dammit, “about me not being able to read, cuz when I was growing up I couldn’t focus for anything, and that made it hard to read, and everyone always thought I was stupid cuz of it.” “I don’t think you’re stupid Rainbow,” Rarity leaned forward and softly put her hand on Rainbow’s thigh, “and I never would have made a joke like that if I knew it would make you feel bad. I’m sorry.” “It’s okay,” Rainbow shrugged, “you didn’t know.” “Perhaps,” Rarity took back her hand and stared vacantly at it, “but I still should have— should have sensed it somehow? I don’t know, I just know that I’m your friend, and a good friend doesn’t make her friends feel bad about themselves.” “Rarity,” Rainbow groaned, “it’s not like you even could’ve known. I’ve never told anyone that before, and I usually try to just laugh stuff like that off, pretend it doesn’t bother me. It’s just that this time, when you did it, I dunno. I couldn’t pretend it didn’t hurt my feelings. I don’t think I wanted to pretend.” “What made you change your mind?” “Because it’s you,” Rainbow bit repeatedly on her thumbnail, trying to distract herself from the growing anxiety in her stomach. “I don’t wanna hide stuff from you, Rarity. You’re—” Rainbow cleared her throat. “You’re my best frie—” Rainbow made a retching noise that caused Rarity to cock her head in confusion. Rainbow pulled her legs up in front of her and curled her arms and wings around them, burying her head behind her wings so Rarity couldn’t see the tears forming in her eyes. “You’re like my only friend. And I don’t wanna lose you by letting you see what a fat garbage fire I am.” “You’re not a garbage fire, darling,” Rarity let out a soft laugh and Rainbow looked up to see her eyes were glistening just like Rainbow’s, “no more than I am, at any rate.” “C’mon, that’s not fair,” Rainbow said, “you’re awesome. You’re so cool and smart, and you always know what to do and how to make everypony feel better. You’re amazing, Rarity.” “Rainbow Dash, you’re just as smart as I am,” Rarity said, “and you’re dashing, and brave and cool, and your confidence is infectious. I love being around you, and that’s not going to change just because I occasionally see some of your flaws. You’ve put up with mine long enough. “And I apologize, because I feel that I put undue pressure on you to act tough with my teasing and such. I don’t want you to pretend to be something you’re not, or try to hide the way you really feel, just because you think it’s what I want. I want a relationship where we both feel safe to be honest with each other.” Rainbow didn’t know what to say so she just buried her face behind her wings again. She didn’t bear to think about how Rarity was gonna react to that until she felt Rarity’s hand on her back as the unicorn switched seats to sit next to her. Rainbow looked up at Rarity and could barely see the tears falling down her cheeks past the blurring of tears in Rainbow’s own eyes. “I’m sorry I snapped at you earlier,” Rainbow said, “about the whole Twilight and Applejack thing.” “My comments were uncalled for as well,” Rarity said, though she then paused and bit her lip. “But I do appreciate your apology. If I’m being honest, I did feel a tad burned by your comments.” “I figured you would be,” Rainbow muttered, “that’s why I said it in the first place. And that was shitty of me, so I’m really sorry.” “I think you’ve apologized enough, my dear,” Rarity gently rubbed her hand in circles on Rainbow’s back. “I’m just embarrassed, because I have a crush on that silly librarian after only talking to her for a single day. It’s a little pathetic.” “If talking to her makes you happy,” Rainbow said, “and thinking about her makes you happy, then what’s the problem? You should embrace the stuff that makes you happy, not run away from ‘em.” “Are you speaking from experience, sweetheart?” Rainbow once more tried to bury her face, but Rarity grabbed her cheeks and softly tilted her head up to look her in the eye, brushing some tears from Rainbow’s face with her thumb. “Yeah,” Rainbow croaked, a tender smirk on her face. “I’m going to the library once we return to Canterlot,” Rarity said. “I think you should go to the smithery.” “What if she doesn’t like me?” Rainbow whimpered. “I’ve known Applejack for practically my whole life, sweetheart,” Rarity said, “and I can assure you, the two of you will get along famously. I’ve been saying as much to both of you for months!” “But what if she doesn’t?” Rainbow repeated. Rarity sighed and ran her hand through Rainbow’s mane. “Then you’ll still have me,” Rarity said, “and Twilight and Spike, who are also your friends, by the way.” “I know, I know,” Rainbow muttered. “I just don’t want to admit they’re my friends, cuz I’m afraid of them leaving, of them deciding that I’m too—” “Shh,” Rarity put a finger across Rainbow’s lips. “I don’t want to hear you tearing yourself down for even one more word, understand?” Rainbow nodded, and Rarity gave her a small kiss on the forehead. “You are courageous, smart, funny, and charming. Applejack is going to adore you, and if she does not, well then clearly she has bad taste.” Rainbow snickered at that, and Rarity smiled at making her friend feel a little better. “I’ll see her when we get back,” Rainbow promised. “And I look forward to hearing all about it tomorrow morning.” “Thank you, Rarity,” Rainbow said, rubbing her legs. “You’re really cool.” Rarity wrapped her arms around Rainbow, giving her a hug that the pegasus resisted only slightly before wrapping her arms around Rarity in return and squeezing her tight. “I love you too, you silly pony.”