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// Entry 8: Inexplicably Good Nightday... 
// Story: A Very Happy and Sunny Life 
// by Wearin Hat 
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	First things first; I look absolutely stunning in my new bow-tie thing!  Rarity may be ultimately useless but when it comes to clothing, she really knows how to prove a pony wrong!  I mean, I’ve always thought she was one to force her opinion on others rather than allow them to have their own thoughts.  I’m mature enough to admit my mistake in assuming that about her.  You see, she tried to make my bow-tie thingy all gaudy and crap and I said no.  Apparently, my rejection was all that was needed as she kinda backed off after I told her (In no uncertain terms.) that I was not going to let her ruin it with gems and crap.  It was almost magical!  She even seemed frightened to disagree with me, which I find to be an amazing trait that does a great deal to redeem her in my eyes.  I might just have to make a habit out of not talking crap about her now that I know she has such a positive attribute to her personality.

That wasn't even the only exciting part of my nightday.  You see, practically every stop I made was met with some sort of greatness.  However, I’m getting ahead of myself.  Sometimes I can be pretty selfish and I don't want you or Carty feeling left out anymore.

How was your nightday?  Did you have fun with the button collection?

You didn’t throw a party did you?  Booky, did you throw a party in my home whilst I was away?  For crap’s sake, you DID, didn’t you?  That's messed up, Booky.  I don’t know how I should feel about that.

No, don’t you say a word.  You don’t get to talk for now.

Since you're in such big trouble, I'm gonna go ahead and tell you about my nightday.  Let me start with the first stop I made; the Apple family’s cart in the market.

Have I ever mentioned the market to you before?  Wait, what am I doing?  You’re grounded from trying to talk.  So just shut up and let me tell my story, GEESH!

Anypoo, I’m starting to like going there as everypony seemed pretty dedicated to either avoiding me or staring at me from afar.  I’ve always known my hotness was great, but I never really comprehended the power of it until this nightday.  Luckily, Applejack (The lesbian farmer.) didn’t seem to be affected by it to a great degree.  Disregarding a few nervous ticks that were evident in her facial features (Must suck being a lesbian AND a retard.) , the mare (I hate that word.) was pretty normal.

Remember how I said Carty was a nuisance?  Oh, wait, that's right, you're grounded from talking.

Well, according to Applejack (The farming lesbian.) he decided to go ahead and shatter his axel the very second Big Mac touched him, which was great news considering that I had work this daynight and Carty is pretty much the only thing I own that makes it possible.  However, I dealt with that hurdle when it came time for me to cross it.

What is very sad is that she said that it will take at least until tomorrow to get Carty back into working condition.  I swear that guy has it out for me sometimes, which, I suppose, is why you’ve never met Carty.  He was never too fond of books, not even Shirley.  I think it’s because his mom was killed by a book or something.  Not too sure about that though, you know how he can be.

Anydew, I bought some apples so that I could have something snack on as my quest continued.  It took a little while before my trek was directed towards the Carousal Boutique (I think a grew vagina by just going in the door.) where, as you know, I ordered and received my bow-tie thingy.

That was exciting stop number two for me.  I know, the first one didn’t seem too exciting at first but I quickly came to understand that I was just happy to know that Carty was okay and would be rolling around before too long.

Have I mentioned that Rarity has a little sister?  Oh?  Not gonna fall for it?  Hm, there might just be hope for you yet.

Anystay, she does and I must say that she’s really weird.  All it took was one look at me and the filly was pretty much struck silent and dumb (More like dumber considering the fact that's she's a filly.).  Like I wrote earlier, my hotness is legendary, but I was not aware that it extended to fillies as well.  I must admit that freaked me out a great deal as I’d rather not be sent to jail for fooling around with a filly, that’d probably not win me any friends amongst the inmates and whatnot.

I decided to leave Twilight (The nerd.) for last as I figured that the library would be open the latest.  At the very least I could still break down the door to do business with the mare within if I couldn't get there in time.  However, I didn’t want it to come to that.  Instead, I went to send flowers to the lesbian (The gay one, not the farmer.) I destroyed with my super-hooves.

Are you ready for exciting moment number three?  Hm?  You sure you don't wanna say something?  Alright, if you insist on being quiet then I guess I'll just continue.

Exciting moment number three came when I arrived at the flower stand run by the mare (I hate that word so much.) named Rose.  I ordered some posies...I think, I wasn't paying attention.  Instead, the sound of an English accent somewhere behind me caught my ear.  Upon further investigation I found that the voice belonged to the grey mare from yesterday!  She was the one who ran away from me!  I’d have asked Rose about her name but I think she was too stricken by my hotness to talk as she never said a word beyond asking who the flowers were for.  She seemed to lighten up when I told her they were for Rainbow Dash (You know her as a lesbian.).

This adds a whole new thing to my daily thought list.  I mean, I never expected to find the owner of the hot accent and yet I did!  There’s no way I’ll be forgetting her face anytime soon.  I’m gonna make it my personal goal to hear her use that accent towards me, preferably in some sexual manner in which I may take extra pleasure (Hopefully of the sexual kind.) in.

Lastly, I dropped by the library to find a very angry nerd.  Can't fathom why, though.  Must be her time of the month.  I’m not sure; she was just really upset when she saw me.  That was until I revealed my payload.

As expected, she bought my entire supply.  Well…not my entire supply.

You see, the nerd pretty much screamed when she saw the necklace thing.  I wasn’t sure whether or not she was 
about to die or not, but I know now that she wasn't merely being over-dramatic.  The necklace that I thought was worthless was actually one of the most important items in history.  Yeah, that’s right; it’s an Element of Harmony (The Element of Kindness to be exact.).  Now you must be mentally (As you're still grounded.) asking yourself whether or not this affected the price of the item.  You bet your reference guide it did.

Now knowing the importance of the necklace, I upped my price to about two thousand bits.  Ha, you should’ve seen Twilight’s face.  She was happy that I found the stupid thing and pissed when I told her the price.  However, what got me pissed off was that she wanted me to give it to her.  The nerd even tried to guilt trip me.  I'm shocked anypony would stoop so low, let alone a mare (I'm not really shocked.).

So, rather than just hoof over the element, I decided to hang on to it.  I told her that I was going to keep it until some other pony could afford my price.  This, of course, would require my socializing with other ponies but this is totally worth it.  If I can get somepony to buy this off of me then I won’t have to work for the rest of my life!!!!

No longer seeing a point to standing around in the library, I decided to come home and get to work so that I could enjoy my attire.  Though she didn’t say a word as I left, I can’t help but get the feeling that Twilight will be concocting some sort of nefarious scheme to get the Element of Kindness off of me.

Work was about as boring as ever.  I had to take two buckets with me and use my saddlebags to make up for the lack of Carty.  That really sucked, but there wasn’t much mess for me to take care of.  The worst of it was at the hospital where there was some broken glass and a lot of gauss strewn about the ground alongside a random muffin.

This is where my entry for this daynight must end.  I will, however, leave you with one more bit of thought material; the sight of the muffin gave me an idea.

PLAN MUFFIN DESTROYERER

Phase One: Develop Plan

Phase Two: ???

Phase Three: Profit