Pinkie Pie was in the process of baking a batch of cupcakes. Humming with a smile on her face and enjoying herself (although she would probably enjoy eating the cupcakes more). She bounced over towards the fridge, opened it up, and pulled out a full carton of eggs. Pinkie brought the eggs over to the counter and set them down. She took one out and she was just about to crack it when-
"OH FUCK!" somepony yelped from behind. What followed was the sound of something metal clattering on the floor. Pinkie Pie turned to see Mrs. Cake bending over to pick up scattered brownies and the tin that they had escaped from.
Pinkie looked at the egg in her hoof for a moment. She then thought of an amazing awesome spectacular idea. She threw the egg at Mrs. Cake. It hit her right between the eyes and exploded into pieces of eggshell on impact. Clear and yellow streaks of egg slowly began to slide down her face.
"Pinkie Pie! Now what in the world was that for?" she asked in an irritated voice.
"You should know better than to swear like that Mrs. Cake." she answered. "I just kindly reminded you that you shouldn't."
"Well was really necessary for you to toss that egg at me?" Mrs. Cake said, wiping egg off of her face.
"You gotta do what you gotta do to keep the mouths of ponies clean as a babies flank. Which technically isn't that clean but you get the idea. " Pinkie Pie said with a smirk. Mrs. Cake rolled her eyes at Pinkie and picked up the rest of the brownies.
Pinkie glanced at the carton of eggs. She began to think. She thought about all the other ponies out that there were probably swearing. Every chance they get they drop the F bomb, or a C bomb, or even a Z bomb. She didn't know if the Z word was a real thing or not but she assumed it was anyway.
She decided that if she heard any sort of swear escape anypony's lips she would have no choice but to egg them. If nopony else was going to exact justice upon the ne're-do-wells who were swearing willy nilly and nilly willy, then she would. Right after she bought more eggs. She was going to need a lot.
While Pinkie Pie walked through Ponyville she had several pairs of eyes on her on account of the two dozen cartons of eggs she was pulling in a red wagon behind her. She stopped in front of the town hall and surveyed the area. Listening to every conversation she could here at the same time. Then, she heard it. A yellow pegasus with red and black striped hair said to his friend,
"That just took the fucken cake for me I mean how could she say somethin' like that. So I fucken said to her, I says, enough was a fucken enough and that I'm gonna grab a pair of dice and-" Pinkie Pie, with lightning speed, sped towards the pegasus and threw an egg in his face at full force. His shocked unicorn friend beside him turns to Pinkie.
"WHAT THE FUCK DUDE!" Following that comment Pinkie immediately threw an egg at his face. Eggshells explode outwards like shrapnel from a bomb.
"That's what you get for having a dirty mouth." Pinkie happily tells them before walking off. "Now, where's the next criminal who needs to be brought to justice?" Pinkie says to herself, listening in on the conversations of the various ponies around her.
Twilight Sparkle ,with Spike flying beside her, is taking, a walk through Ponyville. Enjoying the fresh air and the fact that it's the weekend. She's so distracted by the beautiful day that she doesn't see the rock protruding from the ground in front of her and she trips over it.
"SHIT!" she exclaims, immediately covering her mouth and looking to see if anypony had heard that. Nopony seemed to be paying attention to her. They were all looking towards the other direction. Twilight turned just in time to see Pinkie Pie running at her and then throwing an egg in her face.
"Pinkie Pie! What was that for?" she yelled.
"Sorry Twilight but you swore and that's means you get egged."
"How did you even hear me?" Twilight asked.
"Ah bup bup, don't change the subject Twilight. You swore and I punished for it. Just doin' ma job" she began to walk away.
"That was pretty funny." Spike said with a snort. Twilight gave him an ice cold glare. "I mean uh, no. No that's not- that's not funny at all."
Applejack is out in the orchard filling up baskets upon baskets with apples for the harvest. Big Mac was sick today and Applebloom's at school so it was just her today. She walked up to the next tree and gave it a hard buck. The apples fell down, one by one. But a few were still attached to their branches so Applejack gave the tree another buck, this time a little harder. The rest fell down except for three plump red apples that each bounced off of her head. And each time she uttered a different curse word.
"FUCK! SHIT! ASS!" she yelled, rubbing the bumps on her head. Then suddenly three eggs, one after the other, were flung out of a basket full of apples straight into Applejack's face.
"WHAT IN TARNATION!"
Then four pink legs sprouted out of the bottom of the bucket and Pinkie Pie's head popped out of the apples.
"That's just the way the justice cookie crumbles Applejack." she states before running off, still in the apple basket.
"PINKIE PIEEEEEEEE" Applejack screamed at the top of her lungs.
Rainbow Dash was laying on a cloud taking her afternoon nap. She had been dreaming about going so fast that she ended up in another dimension fighting aliens and monsters and monster aliens. But her super awesome dream was interrupted just before she was finally about to figure out her sexuality. She awoke because some asshole had knocked her off the cloud by accident.
"HEY! WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOIN FUCKNUTS!" she yelled after him. She flew back up to the cloud and layed back down. And then another egg flies through the bottom of the cloud and into her back.
"What the shit?" another one hits her in the ear. "WHO THE FUCK IS DOING THAT?" Pinkie Pie slinks into view above Rainbow’s head and throws an egg into her mouth.
"You shouldn't have swore Dashie, now you've got a mouth full of egg." then she leaped up and shot herself through the bottom of the cloud.
Rarity is drawing herself a hot bath. She decided that she needs a break from teaching students, filling orders, running boutiques, and watching baby sisters. She dipped her hoof in the water to check the temperature and then slipped and fell face first into the water. She pulled her head out and yelled,
"GOD FUCKING DAMNIT!" then before she could do anything an egg was thrown directly into her backside which was extended outwards. "OH!" she then turned her head to see Pinkie Pie with a disappointed look on her face.
"I mean I knew ponies were swearing but I didn't know it was this bad." She turned and walked out of the bathroom. Rarity was speechless.
Fluttershy was laying on her couch reading 'How to Read Emotions'. She turned the page and continued reading. She turned the page again, and again, and again, and again. Until she gets up to go get a bookmark because she realized she didn't have one. But she didn't notice Angel Bunny's outstretched foot and tripped over it. She fell face first onto the carpet. She lifted her head up to look at him.
"Now Angel that wasn't a very nice thing to do. I would like you to apologize to me." Angel just blows her a raspberry and hops away. "That rabbit needs a stern talking to."
"Aw fiddlesticks, I thought for sure she was going to say a naughty word." a slightly disappointed Pinkie Pie says to herself from the window. "I don't care if it's weird I'm disappointed about that I still have a bunch of eggs to throw and there's only a few more paragraphs left."
Ponyville is almost entirely covered in various eggshells and yolk. Pinkie Pie stood tall and victorious above the fallen egg covered ponies. She felt that everypony had learned their lesson and that her work here was done.
Celestia was eating her lunch. She sank her fork into the pancakes. She was about to take a bite of the pancake on her fork but it slipped off before she could.
"Dammit." she said. Almost immediately after that a single egg was thrown right between her eyes.