Twilight has been up since 7 today, something which rarely happens. Well, normally it does, but she goes back to sleep. This time, due to Owlowicious' help, she has actually managed to get a head start on her day.

He made her breakfast, which was a delightful cold vichyssoise, organized her scrolls from last night, and refilled her ink.

In the meantime, Spike is nowhere to be found, and usually by nine in the morning he's up and about, albeit groggily.

Wisely, to his credit, he didn't put one of my descrying devices in the area where he sleeps. Obviously he values his privacy. I think I can assume he's still in bed, though. He had a late night yesterday, what with the meteor shower.

The library looks wonderful. Sparkling clean, all organized and everything in its place. Just how Twilight likes it.

Looks like Spike is finally awake! I see him running in circles around the upstairs room, waving frantically at Twilight, who is currently packing up to leave for a book symposium at the town hall.

Well, I shouldn't be too hard on the little guy. He is just a baby Dragon, after all. A weird, experimental, mutant mistake of a Dragon, but still a baby nonetheless.

Owlowiscious doesn't take very kindly to Spike, it seems. Right off the bat they've gotten into an argument.

Well, I say argument. It's just Spike ranting at the poor owl, and the owl just calmly leading him along. I don't think Owlowiscious has a very good first impression of Spike.

Spike: Hi there, I'm Spike. I'm sure Twilight has told you all about me.

Owlowiscious: Hoot. [Indeed she has, my dear chap. Twilight has spoken extensively about you. It is a pleasure and a half to meet you, my good fellow.]

Spike: Uh, Spike? You know, assistant number one?

Owlowiscious: Hoot. [Yes, I most certainly am familiar, my fine lad. May I simply call you Spike, or would 'Master Spike' befit your authority?]

Spike: I'm Spike. And... who are you? What are you?

Owlowiscious: Hoot. [Very well, Spike it is then. It is surely good to make your acquaintance, and I am looking forward to working with you, my lively stripling. As Twilight must have informed you, I am your loyal and humble servant, Owlowiscious. If you must know, I am species Bubo cinerascens of the exalted Strigidae family. My generational roots have all been in the business of servitude, you know!]

Spike: Who?

Owlowiscious: Hoot. [Owlowiscious.]

Spike: I thought your name was Owlowiscious!

Owlowiscious: Hoot. [Oh, I see. You have no idea what I'm saying right now, do you? Fart. Poop. Your father smells like elderberries.]

Spike: Ok, 'who', ' Owlowiscious', whatever. I'm Spike, OK? Look. All you need to know is that I'm number one, and you're number two! Got it?

Owlowiscious: Hoot. [Hah hah, you said 'number one'.]

Spike: So... a man of mystery, huh? I'm keeping my eye on you.

As Owlowiscious continues to help and gain fame, Spike's paranoia grows. Just a while ago, Twilight was showing her new 'number two' to her friends, and he was getting a lot of attention. Spike is jealous, and is actually reading a book about owls for unknown purposes.

I think this is the first time Spike has ever read a book in general, so at least Owlowiscious is a good influence.

I'm not sure what Spike is so jealous about. It wasn't that long ago when he himself was the talk of the town, back when Twilight first arrived.

Well, this wasn't my intention, but either way it sort of works out. Owlowiscious does have a handle on the situation even without Spike around, and if Spike decides to quit out of rage and spite then I'll just have to reassign him. I might even be inclined to set him on Rarity, just for the fun of it, although I would be very frightened to see their children.

Spike has just exploded out the front door, in search for the sacred quill of writing. Such a quest has never been undertaken by a Dragon of his caliber before, and he will have to face trials, hardships and dirty endeavors to finally get the object of lore and legend.

You cannot die, no matter how perilous this quest is, you must be victorious in all things! I know you can do it!

If there's one thing I know about Twilight, is that she really really hates it when someone messes with her books.

Each book is like a leather-bound child to her. A child full of words and paper and knowledge and glue and string and other things that goes into the production and binding of a book. Each child sits upon the shelf of her home, awaiting for her to rip them open and indulge in their sweet, sweet offerings of guts and information. She feeds upon them like parasprites, but figuratively instead of literally, because she actually can't digest paper, I don't think, and the ingestion of books has never conclusively been shown to aid in comprehension.

I remember once when Twilight was still living in the Royal Library in Canterlot, and I had accidentally spilled a tiny spot of vegetable gravy on one of her books, she went absolutely mental. She developed a facial tic that wouldn't go away for three weeks, and she banned all liquids from her room until she found out that dehydration can actually be quite the painful condition.

Rather than make up for it or finding a way to replace the book, Spike has taken upon himself to accuse Owlowiscious of trying to frame him.

Spike's first course of action is to steal a theatrical robe and hat from the costume store. Also, a mustache. That's cute. I used to play dress-up when I was younger, too.

Now, Rarity has left her door wide open, so really, this is only her fault. I really do not know what Spike expected to find in there, but perhaps he was just trying his luck. Either way, he came out with an old pincushion that Rarity converted into a small rat for that other rat of hers to play with.

Also, I'm not sure what is with Spike and his bad habit of soliloquy, but I guess it helps. At least now, Spike knows that owls eat mice.

I guess no one taught him that real mice don't have stuffing for internal organs, buttons for eyes and cloth for skin.

Ok, now I guess it's gone too far. Spike is running away. I can see him packing like a hobo. No way am I going to let such an expensive piece of equipment just up and leave. I know it's hard for him, but still, he has responsibilities, damnit.

I was going to just pluck Spike out of the forest and throw him into Twilight's face, telling them to make up, but maybe less direct approach might be in order. They do need to make up for themselves, and since Spike decided to run to the Everfree Forest, I dare say the opportunity has already presented itself, as long as Twilight takes the bait.

Alright. I know. It's a bit on the silly side. I didn't have many ideas at that point, and I saw him tracking sauce out of the house initially. You don't even want to know what a mess the inside of the library is right now.

The spell simply made it that he would... well... leak ketchup for the next 3 hours, upon which all tracks and traces will disappear.

I know it's a long shot to hope that Twilight won't really figure out that there was something a bit wonky about it, but I'm hoping that her apprehension to find Spike will cloud her judgement a little.

Diaries of an Equestrian Overlord

by KitsuneRisu

20th April