//------------------------------// // Chapter 1 // Story: This is why you should never let ponies play Terraforming Mars // by Petrichord //------------------------------// In an endless ocean of void, the planet Venus continued its slow, unceasing voyage around the sun. For eons, its passage had been unburdened, unadulterated, unmarred by any activity outside of its bright, hostile surface. Beautiful and tempestuous, it orbited in the silence of absolute darkness kept at bay only by the bright, delicate lights of uncountable multitudes of stars. And such beauty and tempestuousness it had! Of radiant reflection from sunlight and captivating hue from its atmosphere, it might have seemed tailor-made to support beautiful light on its supposedly beautiful surface. And yet, the truth was far uglier; everything from its temperature to its atmosphere to its minerals was hostile beyond compare, ready to torture in its own vindicative fashion any pony foolish enough to come close to its poisonous atmosphere. Which is where the totally awesome Helios megacorporation, lead by the totally awesome Rainbow Dash, came in. Using, like, all the money Helios had, Rainbow Dash built a gigantic mirror in orbit around Venus. It pretty much bounced a lot of the light going onto that planet back at Mars, because it was too hot and Mars was too cold and that was how mirrors worked. Then crowds of thousands proclaimed their love for Rainbow Dash and showered her in diamonds. So that was pretty cool. Not literally, but the other way around. The not-literally one. It was cool in that way. Yeah. ******************************************* Rainbow Dash set her cards down, tucked her forehooves behind her head and smirked. “Done.” Starlight Glimmer, Rarity, Fluttershy and Applejack stared at Rainbow Dash. “What?” Rainbow Dash said. “I’m out of money.” “I’m…” Starlight Glimmer rubbed her eyes. “Did you actually spend all your money on building that mirror?” “Forget the mirror.” Rarity stared at Rainbow Dash, jaw hanging slightly open. “That description started out almost poetically. Where did you…?” “Uh, you mean talking about what I was doing? I’unno. It just kind of came to me.” Rainbow Dash shrugged. “Pretty neat, huh?” “Well, I — I’d say that’s a bit of a misunderstatement, dear.” Rarity shook her head. “I can’t say I was expecting something like that.” “Me either. But in a different way. Rainbow Dash, are you sure you want to spend all of your money right out of the gate?” Starlight Glimmer said. “It’s a pretty big gamble.” “Uh, it gives me more money, right? And other stuff which helps me get more money, ‘cause I can get paid for making Venus a nicer place, too.” Rainbow Dash blinked. “Which makes me more awesome and helps me win the game, right? It’s not like I’m not getting anything out of it.” “But I...well...okay.” Starlight sighed. “Your logic isn’t totally bad, so...my turn, I guess.” ******************************************* There would always be problems with colonizing Mars; chief among them was difficulty in arranging for a transactionary system, which is to say a lack of ability to set itself up to harvest the most valuable commodity on Mars or any other planet. And that commodity, the one valuable enough to carry a whole financial situation by itself, was the currency of energy. Energy, enough to power the basic building blocks of life, in all of the shapes and forms it came in! Ubiquitous, yet priceless in worth, for in the day and age of the decline of one planet and the reformation of another, there was nothing more necessary to recreate the foundations of life. But there was none to be channeled on Mars, save for scarce imports of traditional sources. And yet, some megacorporations could make do with even this. Enter Thorgate - the Yakyakistani-rooted company which channeled its aggressive roots to establish a stranglehold on the energy of Equestria. Not merely shareholders and financial manipulators, no; Thorgate’s scientists and technicians were miracle workers in their own right, channeling cutting-edge magic and technology to seemingly fabricate energy where none was thought to be found, through innovation or sheer efficiency. And efficient they proved to be. Under the wise leadership of Chairmare Starlight Glimmer, they found ways to make much out of little, and to squeeze every last drop of technology’s nectar out of any source they could find. Even the crude, inefficient methods of the past could be spun around Thorgate’s fingers with the brilliant insight of Chairmare Glimmer’s mind, and those scarce commodities were enough to sustain, at least in part, the foundations of Mars’ first city, tucked safely away in one of the craters of Solis Planum. And this miraculous first city bore only the most fitting of names: Glimmeropolis. ******************************************* Rainbow Dash arched an eyebrow at Starlight Glimmer. “And you got on my case about spending a lot of money, huh?” “I’ve still got plenty of money in my reserves.” Starlight Glimmer huffed. “But how does that even work? You’ve got to have, like, so many different things to import in order to sustain small colonies of worker ponies, much less an actual civilian base. There’s no way you’re not going to lose bits hoof over fist.” “One word.” Starlight Glimmer’s grin could have been used to carve diamonds. “Taxes.” “Really?” Rarity replied, contempt dripping out of every syllable. “And what sort of ponies do you suppose would be willing to pay enough taxes to fund your ludicrous enterprise?” “Celebrities looking to retire away from the masses, the heads of organizations looking to take up residence in a place that Equestria’s legal bodies couldn’t afford to reach and affluent ‘investors’ hoping to carve their name into the history of the planet and achieve a different sort of immortality. Or something like that. It’s a work in progress, but so is everything else on the planet, right?” “I’m...not sure that means entirely what you want it to mean, dear.” “I’m the one with the most experience with this game.” Starlight Glimmer eyeballed Rarity. “But go ahead and try to prove me wrong. Show me if you can be more efficient with your finances.” “With pleasure,” Rarity replied. “Let’s see…” ******************************************* The ponies of Equestria had, back in the days of yore, attributed the inexplicable miracles of the universe to gods. Hundreds and hundreds of them, from all sorts of cultures, and the overlap between many of them was great. As the days passed by, the ponies of Equestria discarded their silly superstitions and grew to recognize the powers of magic, the princesses and technology alone; yet, the gods never vanished in their entirety. Faith in the mythological and divine may have been nevermore, but symbolism was eternal, and ponies steadfastly held onto the names of these deities for inspiration and a twisted sense of historical permanence. Such was the case with Aphrodite. Long ago, even back in the roots of its founders as soil experts and farming shareowners, the ponies of its spirit and its pay understood the value of beauty in all things: how it gave meaning where none seemed to exist, how it touched a universal chord with all living things, and how — arguably — it was a thing of prime importance to cultivate in a universe filled with vast, ugly truths. And from this vision and the cleverness of their financial affairs came a leader known as Rarity, whose sheer beauty surpassed not just that of all ponykind, but of all living things. “Ugh,” Rainbow Dash moaned. “Spare me.” “Don’t interrupt,” Rarity snapped, and continued. Rarity, the immeasurably beautiful unicorn chairmare, sought only to bring beauty to Mars — for the good of the universe and the good of the planet (and, perhaps, for the good of the company itself.) Yet, there was one slight flaw in the concept of terraforming Mars to a lush planet of unrivalled beauty — namely, that there was rich beauty on the planet itself, unique and — should the terraforming process remain woefully unchecked — tragically ephemeral. And thus, Rarity proposed a bold, daring resolution to the United National Mars-Equestria initiative, the global financiers of the whole bold terraforming enterprise: why not preserve a small slice of this beauty? Why not set aside some of this land to reflect the Martian landscape as it originally was, in all its resplendent glory? Surely, Equestria would have no need to terraform the beautiful Pavonis Mons volcano, inefficient and expensive as such an endeavor would be. Surely, instead, it could remain an everlasting testament to the beauty of an untouched mars, pure and eternal? And the United National Mars-Equestria initiative saw wisdom in this. They increased Aphrodite’s funding for as long as Aphrodite promised to maintain the boundaries that kept the Old Martian National Park, as it was named, in a state of perfect preservation and historical significance. And it was so, all of it was so, and Aphrodite was justly rewarded for their wisdom. ******************************************* “Hardly spent anything on it.” Rarity struck an elegant, refined pose. “I’ve got plenty left in my reserves. And, I dare say, that should help bolster my income significantly.” Applejack rolled her eyes. “That’s mighty generous of you, Rarity. Good t’know how much effort you put into doin’ absolutely nothin’ and getting paid for it like actual hard working ponies.” “Do I detect jealousy in your voice?” Rarity smirked at Applejack. “Is somepony jealous that they, the farm pony who works with the land, hadn’t thought to recognize the value of the landscape before a simple seamstress?” “I ain’t jealous that you didn’t put in enough effort to break a sweat. Once I get done with my genuine, bona-fide labor, you’re gonna wish that you had half the gumption an’ half the profits that I do. Mark my words.” “Shall ‘prove me wrong’ be the catchphrase of this train ride, then?” Rarity’s smirk broadened. “Or is your grandstanding unfounded? Do you actually have a plan to surpass my glorious intellect?” “As a matter of fact, I do.” Applejack readjusted her hat. “Now, let’s see — ” “Um.” Four sets of eyes turned towards Fluttershy, who was continuing to hide her face behind her cards. “I think, um. I-I think it’s my turn. If that’s okay.” Fluttershy mumbled. “Oh, right, yeah.” Applejack sighed. “Yeah, get on with it.” Fluttershy nodded. ******************************************* Once upon a time, there were all of these big, important corporations. They did a lot of big, important things, and they all tried to make Mars a beautiful, happy planet that was easy to live on! And that was very kind of them. But next to all those corporations, there was one last, teensy little one called Ecoline. Ecoline liked working with plants, because they saw how pretty plants could be. So they wanted to bring plants to Mars, too, and make it all lush and green! I-in the spots where it was okay for Mars to be lush and green, anyway. But to make it green, Ecoline wanted to set it up to make it rain, eventually. And for that, they needed water. So, um, while it was pretty expensive to do, they decided to import some water from Europa! It should give them all they needed to help make Mars beautiful and full of water. They had to set up a colony there, and they had to get ready to send shipments in and out of there, too! But they knew that, in the end, it would all be worth it. And for the first time ever, there was beautiful water and ice in Shalbatanis Vallis! A-and everyone was very, very proud of Ecoline for doing that. ******************************************* “How was that?” Fluttershy asked. “Did I say everything okay?" “How much water are you plannin’ to bring over?” Applejack replied. “Oh, goodness, I don’t know how much more. I think I might need to bring over some more ice for — ” “Good. My turn.” ******************************************* Now, of course, the United National Mars-Equestria initiative weren’t just gonna let all them corporations do as they pleased. It wouldn’t be right for ‘em it they didn’t get a piece of that sweet, sweet Martian pie, after all, an’ it only made sense for them to do what they wanted. An’ they had some good ideas. All that water that was goin’ about the planet, straight from Europa? Perfect breedin’ ground for some algae suited for arctic climates. It wouldn’t have been much green, but even a little bit of green was better than no green at all. So they did the thing where they set up their own independent group related to ‘em — the Martian-Equestrian Multinational Establishment, a megacorp only in name — and that independent group developed an’ sent out the arctic algae for Mars, which would thrive in that good ol’ Europan water an’ ice, an’ so everythin’ was right as rain. The end. ******************************************* Rarity snorted. “That was your idea of a narrative? Really?” “ ‘Course it was” Applejack replied. “Short, sweet, to the point. Ain’t no sense in usin’ a lot of fancy language like you did.” “The point is in having an enriching experience.” Rarity sniffed. “I daresay that your offering to this particular platter was rather poor.” “Oh, sure, I bet you’re livin’ like a queen over there, bein’ so rich an’ all!” Applejack snorted. “Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash over here’s got more accolades than you do.” “A-and me,” Fluttershy added. “Yeah, an’ that. So you think you wanna actually spend some of your hoity-toity fundin’ and get on their level?” “...You know what?” Rarity glared at Applejack. “Why not?” ******************************************* Not that Aphrodite was one to take up arms against such ugly accusations that certain institutions had levied at them, baseless and crass as they were. It was simply a matter of whether or not Aphrodite had more to contribute to Mars. And Aphrodite had the funds to do something grand, so Aphrodite did. A large comet was set to sail past Mars — a comet full of ice and other nutrients that would enhance the terraforming process considerably. Though expensive, it was a clever plan, executed brilliantly, and so the common pony’s fondness for Aphrodite increased exponentially. ******************************************* “How’s that for getting on their level?” Rarity added, sporting an expression that was almost as smug as Rainbow Dash at her finest. “How’s this?” Applejack replied. ******************************************* Aphrodite forgot that all that ice from the comet would just get the Martian-Equestrian Multinational Whatsits that Applejack was leadin’ to do better, ‘cause now their arctic algae had even more room t’grow in. Also, Applejack’s group did good enough that they built a titanium mine on Mars, too, ‘cause everypony needed titanium, so now Applejack’s group was good for everypony in a sensible manner. ******************************************* “Um, perhaps this was a bad idea” Starlight Glimmer cut in. “Maybe I should put this away if everypony’s going to start getting mad at each other.” “I’m not being mad!” Rarity replied. “I’m being competitive. There’s a difference.” Starlight cocked her head to the side.“What’s the difference?” “Being competitive is fun, of course!” Rarity stared at Starlight as if she had just publicly admitted to not knowing the sum of two plus two. “Haven’t you ever felt that way, dear?” “Besides,” Applejack added. “There ain’t much we’ve got to do around here, anyway. I can’t even look out th’ window.” “You can’t?” Rainbow Dash said. “Why not?” Applejack pointed at the window. “Take a look for yourself. It’s all black out there.” Rainbow Dash took a look. Applejack wasn’t wrong. It wasn’t just dark outside — it was pitch black. It was the blackness of being somewhere entirely without light, like they were hurtling through an endless void. “Huh. Where are we, exactly?” Rainbow Dash mused. “We’re going through some kind of tunnel, right?” “I think so?” Applejack replied. “But I ain’t sure what tunnel we’re goin’ through.” “Come to think of it, does anypony know where we’re going to?” Rarity added. Silence settled in the air. Five sets of mouths, unwilling to acknowledge a lack of familiarity with the answer, let the question hang in the air. “Eh.” Rainbow Dash finally replied. “It’s not like we’re not gonna get a reminder eventually. Besides, if we’ve been in a tunnel for this long, it’s probably not gonna be for much longer until we get out. We’re just underground or going through a mountain range or something, right?” “...Yeah. That’s got to be the case.” Applejack rubbed one of her eyes. “I probably ain’t thinkin’ clearly ‘cause I haven’t got a chance t’sleep yet. I’ll see if I can catch a nap after this game, while we’re busy doin’ this whole cross-continental thing.” “Cross-continental. Right. Probably just a friendship map deal that’s got us all slightly stressed out,” Starlight Glimmer concluded. “Is everypony up for playing another round?” Five heads nodded, the starting player token was passed clockwise, and the game continued.