//------------------------------// // Chapter 2 // Story: Keijo Equestria // by Typist Gray //------------------------------// “My goodness!” Booming announced. “I was honestly expecting the tribes to pair off against each other, but it looks like we’ve got a good ol’ fashioned battle of the sizes here.” “Indeed, Booming,” Thoughtful commented thoughtfully. “And the best example of this would appear to be Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash.” “That’s right, Thoughtful. Rainbow is hopping all over that tiny Land like a grasshopper. Boy, what a determined little scrapper. Fluttershy can’t even keep up.” “She might not need to, Booming. Rainbow’s style leans more towards being an out-fighter, meaning she keeps her distance most of the time and relies on speed to throw her opponent off track. Fluttershy’s build enables her to shrug off just about everything Rainbow can throw at her. This would make her more of a counter, meaning she’s using her opponent’s strengths against her. At the rate they’re going, all Fluttershy really needs to do is maintain a defensive stance until Rainbow tires herself out.” “Speaking of hopping, I’ve never seen an earth pony pull off moves like that. Yes, folks. It looks like Twilight is at her wit’s end just trying to avoid her hyper opponent. Then again, the way they’re moving, I’d say their more likely to slip off than be knocked off.” “Very possible, Booming, but let’s not forget the case where small actually seems to be winning. Apple Jack is moving pretty slowly thanks to that injury. Her legs have always been the source of her power in the past, so how does she plan on overcoming this situation with her limp?” “You can do it, AJ!” called a little yellow filly from the stands. “Ah believe in you.” “E’yup!” By the time the announcers had offered their commentary, RD had already decided to retreat to the bridge to recover her breath. “Dammit,” she swore under her breath. Fighting Fluttershy was like punching water. Sure, she could make ripples, but it’s not like that actually made her opponent move. Her best chance had been to catch the mare before she put her guard up and aim for somewhere she wasn’t so soft. At the very least her butt wasn’t terribly sore after delivering all those hits. Anypony even remotely familiar with martial arts would have had nothing but criticism for Fluttershy’s defensive stance. She was open to attack from virtually every angle. The way she held her arms in front of her showed a lack of confidence that any opponent could have easily taken advantage of. It was only thanks to the unique nature of this competition that these weaknesses could be mostly ignored. However, she was still cornered in the same spot. RD ran through several strategies in her head. She could try for another splash decoy, but Fluttershy would most likely counterbalance the Land. Normally against an opponent of this size and in this position, she’d go for a power attack. Bigger opponents were slower, so there was little risk of them dodging and her launching herself into defeat. The force would travel into her opponent, knocking her back while also giving RD sufficient cushioning so that she didn’t go flying with her. However, Fluttershy’s build made any direct attacks to the torso next to useless. Besides, Fluttershy was notorious for surprising nay-sayers in the past. Her best bet would be to lure Fluttershy into attacking, and then taking advantage of her lesser speed, but that kind of attack was antithetical to the mare’s counter style. No. What this situation called for, was cunning. “Guess you don’t really care about the animals, after all.” “Wh-what?” “You heard me. Animals. Caring. You don’t.” “Th-that’s not true. Wh-why would you say that?” Fluttershy stammered, sounding hurt. “Don’t listen to her, Shy,” Talon called. “She’s baiting you!” “I said it cuz it’s obvious.” Seeing Fluttershy’s lip quiver like that sent an arrow through the blue speedster’s heart. In her mind she was carefully measuring each word to provide maximum provocation with minimum hurt feelings. They’d even agreed back in the locker rooms that trash talk was fair game and that all obviously provocative statements weren’t meant to be taken personally. “We all came here cuz there’s something we believe in. There’s ways we want to help and make things better. Everypony else is doing their best and giving it their all,” RD gestured out to where the others were fighting. “Everypony… but you. You’re just standing there, not doing anything, because that’s how little you care.” “S-stop it, Rainbow Dash. I… I know what you’re doing, and it-it’s not w-working?” “What am I doing? Am I trying to make you move, to take action, to prove you actually have something worth fighting for? Is that what I’m doing? Is that what’s not working? Is it, Shy? Is it!?” Fluttershy was trembling now. Mentally she understood that her friend was just saying things to rile her up. It was just like Twilight had taught her during their strategy seminars that angering an opponent was a good way to make them careless. Emotionally, however, she was hurting. RD’s words hurt. RD was her friend, and friends didn’t hurt each other like this. Stop it, Rainbow. Stop it. Even in her mind her words were barely above a whisper. “Clearly I should win. I put in the hours years before Keijo was even a thing.” Doesn’t really make sense, but whatever. “I’m going to win, Shy. That means you’re going to lose. No new animal kennels.” B-b-but they need places to sleep. “Only the cheapest of expired pet food!” Wait… no. “No. They’ll get sick if its expired.” “In fact, I was actually thinking about working with the nature preserve ponies to put together a kind of petting zoo arrangement. Get the foals liking animals early, ya know.” Fluttershy’s ears perked up. Finally RD was sounding like RD again. “But if you’re not going to put in the effort, then why should I?” An audible *SNAP* was heard well up into the nosebleed section. It was at that time that RD realized she might have crossed a line. “Oops.” “Ai-yi-yi-yi-yi!” Fluttershy’s war cry was like something out of Daring Do, where the crazed tribesponies would swarm on the protagonist. RD never thought she’d be able to hear the real thing in person, and now she wished she never had. She was getting exactly what she’d hoped for, and was already regretting every bit of it. Fluttershy launched herself from the Land with approximately the force of a speeding train engine. Her eyes were red with rage and steam was literally bellowing from her ears and nostrils. She wasn’t entirely a savage beast, though. When she was close enough to attack, she remembered to do so with her cleavage, bringing her heaving breasts down upon the smaller pegasus like a great hammer onto a teeny tiny nail. *WHOOSH* The sweeping gust of wind was audible. Figuring something like this would happen, and that Fluttershy would anticipate another duck downwards, RD instead jumped straight up and out of the bigger mare’s range. Fluttershy just stared in confusion, unable to use her hands to grab at her opponent, exactly as RD expected. And although the speedster was equally limited by the lack of wings, she’d trained for precisely this scenario. She kicked back and up while throwing her upper body down and forward, creating a slight spin. She’d timed it just right so that her (not) flat chest made contact with the back of Fluttershy’s head. The angle of the impact combined with the mare’s momentum to utterly throw her off balance. Fluttershy staggered a moment, but she was too top heavy and her legs were too far behind her. Instead of the bridge, it was the water she saw directly below her. A single flap of her large wings would have been more than enough to save her, to grant her those precious extra seconds to bring her hooves beneath her tremendous figure. Instead, the merciless force that was gravity had seized hold of her titanic titties and was pulling them down with the possessiveness of an entitled parent at the supermarket. All was lost. *SPLASH* *Ding Ding* “And she’s out!” Booming announced as the screens depicted an animation of Fluttershy’s portrait falling into the water. “Fluttershy is the first to fall out of the ring! Loser!” He had to speak extra loudly over the torrent of boos and swears. Few had actually expected Fluttershy to win, but they were no less wrathful for the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad mare who had unjustly taken her out. Fluttershy resurfaced a few seconds later, the coolness of the water having calmed her down. Immediately she realized where she was and what had happened. Floating in place, she turned to see where her friend had landed. RD stood there, stoically watching over Fluttershy like a gargoyle guarding a castle. The two shared a look. “Honestly, I hadn’t actually thought about the petting zoo thing until just now,” the speedster admitted plainly. Fluttershy gave no response. RD crossed her arms over her (not) flat chest and lifted her chin in pride. “Actually, not a bad idea, if I do say so myself. I’m sure the foals’ll love it.” Fluttershy sniffled. She wasn’t crying. That was just pool water. But she nodded vehemently and gave RD a thumbs-up. The speedster returned the gesture, relieved by the reconciliation over this protracted feud that the two had been brooding over for countless seconds, which were monitored on the screen. With a clear head, RD gave Fluttershy one final nod before dashing off to her next opponent. Twilight must have crossed six different Lands by this point. Running in serpentine was no easy feat when everything was so narrow and at right angles. But no matter where she went or how fast she moved, the terrible terror that was Pinkie Pie on a mission dogged her every step of the way. Dammit! This is getting me nowhere, the bookworm thought to herself. There’s no way I can outlast Pinkie in a game of endurance. But if I attack, there’s no way to predict how she’ll react. “Got’ch’ya!” Thankfully, Twilight had been on one of the circular Lands when she’d heard that, enabling her to dodge to the side just in time to hear a mighty thunder clap. Squatting low and with her hooves far apart, she looked back. Where her head had been, there were only Pinkie’s breasts being pressed together by her hands. As the pink mare continued in her leap, Twilight understood that if she’d been even a second slower, the impact from Pinkie’s breasts upon her skull would have been enough to knock her out, and possibly give her a concussion. Those pink melons were dangerous. Pinkie landed on the nearby bridge with the grace of a ballerina and turned bodily to face Twilight. “Almost had you there, didn’t I.” Again, there was that tone. Something in Pinkie’s words made Twilight’s skin crawl. Her instincts as a former prey animal were screaming out to her to run. There was real danger, and she needed to get away. Except there was nowhere for her to go. This Land only had bridges on two sides. She could go back the way she came, but that would leave her open to another of Pinkie’s leaping attacks, and she doubted the next one would miss. Nowhere to run. No time to plan. Twilight’s thoughts raced at the speed of light. She thought about the road Land and how it was all connected. Useless without time to plan. She crunched the numbers on Pinkie’s athletic ability relative to her own. In every way she was outmatched. She tried thinking about the strategy books she’d committed to memory. This was a test, and she’d done everything possible to study. So what was the answer? And why was it getting harder to think? Pinkie held her hands behind her back, swaying her body and wagging her tail in a show of childlike innocence. “I can see it in your eye, Twi. You’re overthinking things again. You always do that when you get in a bind.” Twilight had to adjust her hoofing to keep from falling. Why was she getting so drowsy all of a sudden? “The worst part is you know you’re doing it,” Pinkie continued, still swaying. “So you start thinking about overthinking, which leads to even more overthinking, and thinking about not thinking, which is just another kind of thinking. Think-think-think, Twilight. Think.” Breasts sway to the left. “Think.” Breasts sway to the right. “Think.” Breasts sway to the left again. When she realized what was happening, Twilight slammed her open palms against her upper cheeks at full force. *SMACK* Her thoughts were clear again. “No fair using teat hypnosis!” Pinkie’s smile was ever so slightly condescending. “I dare you to look in the rule book to see where it says I’m not allowed.” “Chh,” Twilight hissed. Pinkie knew that she’d already memorized the rules. She was being taunted, teased by an overwhelming opponent of unknowable power. What could she do? “You might as well give up,” Pinkie offered companionably. “It’s alright, you know. Like I said, you’re the smart magician. Everypony expects you to be unbeatable in magic, or even a written test, but no pony can be good at everything. Athletics just aren’t your thing, and that’s fine. The world would be so boring if everypony was the same. We’ve all got our own unique talents.” She turned her hip to the side, showing off her cutie mark with a roll of her rump that was caught on camera. “My talents just happen to be better suited to stuff like this. So what’s the harm in giving up?” “You’re right,” Twilight admitted, leading to several audible gasps in the audience. “When it comes to sporty stuff, I’m barely a bench warmer. The most non-magical activity I do on most days is walk up the stairs, and even then I’ll sometimes use magic as a short cut. It might not be the healthiest lifestyle, but I’m proud of my magic and what I can do with it!” The smile on Pinkie’s face never wavered. She was sincerely happy for her friend. “I’m glad you understand.” And she took a step forward. “Oh, I understand, alright.” Pinkie paused mid-step. Twilight’s tone was defiant and challenging. Based on her posturing, it looked like the purple mare was revving up to cast a spell that could tear through a mountain, but the horn ring was still in place. What was happening? “I understand that I don’t do what I do just because it’s a talent. I worked my ass off to get where I am today. I studied until I was literally thinking in theorems. I stayed up night after night to make sure I understood everything perfectly. I was ready to go into the Everfree Forest alone to fight Nightmare Moon, even if the rest of you hadn’t forced me to take you along. And that bullheadedness ended up giving me the best friends I’ve ever had. I’m Twilight Sparkle, dammit! Win or lose, that means I’m not allowed to give up!” All was quiet for a second. Even the other competitors had paused to listen to the mare’s speech. After a time, the silence was broken by a single pony clapping. This pony was joined by a second, and then a third and fourth. Somewhere in there was the twentieth. Soon the entire stadium was applauding, but none were louder than Pinkie Pie. “Damn straight, you’re Twilight Sparkle!” the pink pronker cheered, clapping so violently that it sent ripples through the water. “This wouldn’t be as much fun if you weren’t.” Grinning in challenge, Twilight charged forward. Pinkie had been right. Overthinking was her weakness, especially against Pinkie’s chaos. Her only solution was to let the adrenaline flow and trust in her instincts. And so she did. She started with a feint, swinging her butt low to go for Pinkie’s knees. Pinkie jumped, realizing all too late that she’d left herself open. Twilight’s next instinct was to spin around, bend over, and launch herself straight up. Pinkie, however, pulled a Pinkie. She pulled a move that should have been impossible, twisting her back in such a way that hurt just to look at. Twilight’s attack missed, but maybe that was fine. The way Pinkie was coming down on the bridge, it looked like she might hit face first. Hands were forbidden and there didn’t seem to be time to pull herself out of the dive. Twilight allowed herself to hope. Then Pinkie stopped. She’d stopped in midair, her face mere inches from the Land. “H-how?” Twilight stammered, unable to see anything but the mare’s butt cheeks beneath the tail that had inadvertanly flagged. She followed the sight down until she saw it. Pinkie hadn’t just jumped over Twilight’s initial feint. For whatever reason, she’d seen fit to do so like a ballerina, doing the splits as one leg hugged closely to her chest. It was the hoof attached to this leg that had hit the Land first. From there, it was a simple (for Pinkie) matter of just using her tail to hold her balance. “Clever girl.” Beaming at the compliment and still balancing on one leg, Pinkie spun around and slammed her boobs into the side of Twilight’s head. The purple mare had been too stunned to dodge in time, and went over. *SPLASH* *Ding Ding* “She’s out!” Thoughtful announced, sounding genuinely shocked by this turn of events. Like everypony else, she’d expected that such a rousing speech was the prelude to a short term victory. That’s how things usually went in Equestria. Unfortunately, usually wasn’t the same as always. The screens showed an animation of Twilight’s portrait falling into the water. “Twilight Sparkle has been knocked out! Loser!” Twilight surface, coughing up a bit of chemically cleaned water. “I beat Twilight Sparkle,” Pinkie declared, looking down at the purple mare. “I beat her, ‘cuz she didn’t give up.” Twilight had no choice but to give a heartfelt smile at Pinkie’s endearing words. “Looks like I’m all wet.” “Hehe. I got Twilight Sparkle wet.” That got a few immature chuckles from the audience. “And now I’m off to do the same to my friends, leaving me as the last one dry!” She threw her fist up into the air in what was meant to be a heroic pose. … Silence had befallen the stadium, broken only by the sound of crickets. “Did, uh, that sound better in your head?” Twilight asked. “Yes. Yes it did.” And the pair stared awkwardly at one another for a bit. “Oh well. Time to get my friends wet,” Pinkie proclaimed as she took off running down a bridge. “Shoot! I did it again.” Meanwhile, Rarity and AJ had been using a relatively isolated section of the road Land to exchange blows. Butts were used for delivering punches as well as to block them as both mares squatted low. Every now and then they’d try a feint, or a high or low swing to catch their opponent off guard, but it always went right back to butt punching. AJ was still moving with a bit of a limp, meaning that she couldn’t put as much power into her blows as normal. If she could have, she’d easily be able to knock Rarity into the water with just three or four strikes. Rarity was taking advantage of her friend’s weakness by repeatedly aiming for the same spot, in the hopes of wearing her down. Unfortunately, it appeared as though her earlier blow was as much the result of luck as timing, and her luck had run out. She could no longer hit AJ’s tail bone as she had previously, always blocked by the superior muscle that insulated the orange mare’s butt. AJ also maintained a height advantage, which allowed her to punch low or high at her leisure, while Rarity was limited to more predictable low blows. This is getting me nowhere, but I can’t let up, Rarity told herself. If AJ was allowed to retreat, to get even a minute’s worth of recovery, she’d be right as rain and the fashionista would be done for. This, Rarity knew to be an irrefutable truth. Her only hope at this point was to keep pressing the attack and hope that she either got lucky again or that she came up with a better plan. “I won’t… bother t-telling you to… to give up,” Rarity struggled to say between blows. “We b-both know you’re as s-stubborn as a m-mule.” “Hehe. Ah take-,” she hissed in pain, “th-that as a compliment.” “But… there’s only-y one… way this is going… to end! Keijo is a… lady’s sport. And… I am the most… ladylike… here!” “We’ll see how-” Applejack once again drew a hissing breath as her tailbone continued to lance pain as she moved around. “… ladylike ya are after Ah-” AJ grunted as she exerted her body for her next move. “… sit on yer face!” AJ spun and began running laps along the outskirts of the Land around Rarity. There wasn’t enough room to get much momentum, but that wasn’t her plan. Knowing Rarity’s eyes would be glued to her, AJ still stopped midstride, with her body practically horizontal, kicked upwards, and threw her body into a spin. The sheer mass of her boobies and buttocks caught a lot of wind resistance, but she was still being carried by the force of her kick, right at Rarity’s middle. The fashionista couldn’t help but be impressed by the daring of such a complex attack. There wasn’t time to dodge to the side. The way the spin was aimed, Rarity had the option to duck low or attempt to jump over. Ducking seemed to be the easiest way to evade, but AJ would be expecting that. No doubt she planned on planting her hoof down mid-spin and follow through with her momentum to strike Rarity with her titanic titties. Jumping over had a lot more risk, especially given Rarity’s rather sedentary lifestyle, but it also had a higher chance of AJ being unable to follow through with her attack. On top of that, whether or not the attack connected, AJ was doomed to further aggravate her injury once she landed. AJ was throwing her all into a gamble, hoping for a quick victory would grant her the precious seconds needed to recover. Rarity made her choice. Crouching low, she propelled herself forward, directly between the spinning guillotines that were AJ’s bottom and boobage. She reasoned that any sort of attack would have to come from somewhere up top. As such, she kept her ears fully perked and paid special attention to any disturbances from her mane. Even so, her angle of approach would make it difficult to evade. AJ felt that she understood Rarity’s reasoning, but couldn’t shake the feeling that there was more to the fashionista’s strategy. Without knowing what to expect, her only option was to go with her original plan and willfully spring whatever trap lay in store. She did, extending one leg out and hitting the Land. She carefully bent her knee to absorb most of the impact. From there she adjusted the angle of her spin to bring her ass directly into Rarity’s path. If the unicorn feinted or tried to pull back at the last minute, AJ could just continue her spin until her bust was brought into play, once more using her superior size to her advantage. Rarity allowed herself the faintest of smiles at how willingly AJ had played right into her hands. Instead of slowing down or pulling a feint, she also adjusted her angle of approach by pivoting on one hoof. This spun her body around into a prime Keijo punching position. Her target was AJ’s thigh. Given the bigger mare’s awkward pose and bodily trajectory, compromising her balance now would leave her with no chance of recovering. Ducking her head low with ass held high, Rarity thrust her white bottom out… Except that her target wasn’t there. “What!?” AJ was still spinning and flew right over Rarity’s head. She’d only left her hoof on the Land briefly to adjust her approach, but quickly kicked off to redouble her spin before Rarity could counter. This time she brought both hooves down onto the Land, again bending her knees to absorb the bulk of the impact. Her center of gravity was virtually nonexistent with her body standing diagonal like that. She’d not be able to stand for long, but she had no plan to. Rarity saw the silhouettes of the grand mountains of meat with the clouds up above before she saw the real things. AJ’s top held her teats firm in most cases. However, the nature of Keijo meant that a bit of room to freely move around was still necessary. As such, AJ’s breasts hadn’t quite caught up with her body’s new trajectory, meaning they had pulled back and almost completely obscured the earth mare’s vision. The pair of mountains were now descending upon the white unicorn like a great avalanche. There wasn’t time to dodge, only to try and counter. Rarity was still somewhat bent over with her ass in the air. However, this meant that she was also directly facing AJ’s attack. Spinning for a butt attack against such a large opponent had too high a risk of missing from this angle, so her best chance was to beat the earth mare boob-to-boob. Rarity straightened her legs and arched her back. Her goal was to hit AJ’s boobs from below and hopefully redirect the big mare’s momentum forward instead of down. This ran the risk of AJ falling directly on top of her, taking them both out, but there wasn’t time to think of another plan. “Aaahhhhh!” “Aaaarrrrgh!” *CLAP* White and orange breast flesh cracked with a mighty, fleshy collision that sent ripples through both the mares’ bodies and the water. Rarity’s arms were pulled back to give her thrusting chest more room. She could feel herself losing fast beneath AJ’s weight. Arching her back was quickly proving to be a mistake, as it forced her to lean back at an increasingly awkward and untenable angle. AJ was only slightly better off, relying on Rarity to support her weight, but that support only had a life span of a few more seconds. Bringing a hoof forward to regain her balance would require letting up on the pressure, which Rarity could use to pull back. Thus they’d be right back to where they were before the spin attack, only with AJ’s injury a little worse off. “Not… bad!” Rarity grunted, fighting with all her strength to hold AJ at bay. “S-same ta you,” AJ replied with a sportsman’s grin. “Havin’ fun?” “More so than… expected,” Rarity admitted. “Good.” AJ then did the unthinkable. It was an act beloved in slapstick, but sneered at and spat upon in the ring, leaving the audience silent and dumbstruck. Punching a mare in the teats was no less shameful than hitting a stallion in the balls. It was an act that almost always resulted in the striker being expelled from the match, but not this time. And not even the unorthodox rules of Keijo would allow for fists to be used in any manner on one’s opponent, least of all for something so shameful. AJ, however, was an honorable and honest mare. Although determined to win, she’d never stoop so low as to strike another in such a tender place. Herself, however… “Me too!” Rarity saw it coming. She had time to dodge, but was too stunned to process the move in time. Spreading her arms out wide, AJ brought both open palms inward for a mighty and terrible slap. Rarity instinctively flinched, further compromising her hoofing, but was more stunned when she saw the target of AJ’s attack. Her own boobs! “I don’t believe it, folks!” Booming cried out. He and Thoughtful had been narrating the players’ moves for some time, just to make sure the audience was keeping up. But this was something no pony saw coming. “Apple Jack is… p-punching her own teats?” AJ grinned, biting on her lip until she broke the skin. It distracted her from the other self-inflicted injury. Her palms were slamming together at full force, squishing her melons together like a pair of water balloons. A jolt of piercing pain was sent through her fun bags, but she ignored it. The smile she directed at Rarity was both sadistic and just a little masochistic. AJ had played with her boobs before. What mare didn’t? But while she prided herself on her udders being more muscle than fat, there was still just enough there to allow for a bit of squishiness. And just like a water balloon, or anything else that squished, compressing one area would send the internal mass to expand another area. Slapping her breasts together like this pushed that mass outward, directly against Rarity. Rarity gasped, squeaking ever so faintly. It was as though AJ’s already considerable bust had suddenly expanded out by several inches. It was fast, too fast for her body to compensate. She slipped, losing track of the ground for just a second. She fell, staring up into AJ’s eyes the entire way down. *Thud* The Land wasn’t too hard, but it still left the fashionista’s bottom a little sore. Or maybe it was the cumulative effect of taking and dealing all those previous butt attacks finally catching up to her. Either way, she gave a ladylike whimper of pain as she rubbed where it was sore. “Ow-ow-ow!” *Ding Ding* “Rarity has hit the Land with her bottom. Loser!” “Hey,” greeted a mare with a friendly southern drawl. “Good match.” Rarity looked up to see her large friend towering over her, hand outstretched. Rarity returned AJ’s friendly smile with a gracious one of her own. She extended her own hand and allowed herself to be pulled up. The good friends heartily shook hands. “Is that legal?” Booming asked. “They’re touching hands.” “Rarity is already out. And given that this is just a charity match, I think we can make allowances for a bit of sportsmanship,” Thoughtful observed thoughtfully. “Also, if we disqualified Apple Jack over something like this, I don’t have confidence in my ability to outrun an angry mob.” “Fair enough,” Booming conceded. “But what a show, folks! Rainbow Dash showed us that she’s more than just a speeding bullet. She’s also got biting words that’ll tear her tender-hearted opponent right to the core. Some might consider this dirty pool, but that gets too close to pun territory for my liking.” This observation was met with more than a few boos and jeers from the audience, to which RD respectfully answered by flipping a couple birds at full force. “Where Fluttershy might have lacked for speed and confidence, Pinkie Pie brought it all and then some. Like Rainbow, she managed to use intimate knowledge of her opponent’s mind, something only possible after being such good friends over the years. Only unlike Rainbow, it was less kicking-an-injured-puppy and more I’m-afraid-to-sleep-tonight.” Many in the audience nodded their agreement while Pinkie quirked her head obliviously. “And lastly, we had the beauties of brawn and posh cheek-to-cheek and giving it their all. Despite their overt difference in physical ability, both mares seemed to stay on an even playing field. Neither was able to hold the advantage for too long before the other was able to enact some form of counter. In the end, I think Rarity should really consider hitting the gym to do more than just maintain her figure.” To this the audience cheered uproariously, to which AJ held up Rarity’s hand in a show of solidarity.