//------------------------------// // Session 96 // Story: Ponies and Dragons (Just Have Fun) // by Alex Warlorn //------------------------------// Session 96.0 Ardashir (with flashback) That was when Fairest of Them All, Dark Lord, and YourBestFriend(Cozy Glow's character), appeared and rushed to the boss monster Garble... and let their characters be killed to give the gate keeper boss an automatic buff. Back in Equestria, in Grogar's hidden lair, the three villains cackled with glee and high-fived each other for making the impending battle even more dangerous. "After we help Grogar conquer the world," Tirek rubbed his hands together, "as soon as I get my hands on that traitor Discord, I'm going to put him in this game somehow, just so I can kill him again and again!" "Hah! Reminds me of all the times I seduced Shining Armor's paladin when we were gaming up at the Crystal Empire!" Cozy and Tirek looked at her in disbelief. Chrysalis sniffed. "What? Not all of us were locked in Tartarus." "Dying to empower a greater villain was a great idea! I..." Cozy gulped and turned pale. "Wait, what if that's why Grogar wants us around? To take OUR power to defeat the Mane Six?" Chrysalis and Tirek opened their mouths to laugh at the idea -- and instead looked at each other in mounting horror. And in the shadows at the far side of the room, a hidden Grogar smiled. Session 96.1 Kendell2 Twilight decided to do something a little bit different playing Manecraft for the fun of it: she entered her name into the seed generator. When it loaded up, she was rather happy with the first thing she saw: a nice open plains with some exposed materials. She decided to do the smart thing and instantly get some sheers to make a bed with the nearby sheep's wool before night fall, finding just enough surface iron to do it... And then instantly noticed a village nearby which beds now auto generated in. After a sigh of annoyance and night in bed (and meticulously making sure her bed, crafting table, and furnace were arrange symmetrically) , she decided to go over and check it out...and noted that despite including a blacksmith and stone mason's place, the population was entirely the default villagers with no trades...And to her frustration, no library. "Fine, I'll just build one later..." She then decided to do something different and make her house look like a tree in tribute to her old library, by growing trees around it to get a basic idea. She wanted spruce...but found the one spruce tree within easy access only dropped three saplings when she wanted four and had to go on a walk to the nearby mountain biome...and ended up with five. Her OCD forced her to go back and get exactly one more to have an even six. She decided to mine for iron to make proper gear...and didn't find any as she went down until she'd already found emerald she couldn't mine and had to mine around it...and then hit a certain type of stone. "Ah! Silverfish!" yelled Twilight as she ran right into a nest of Silverfish that instantly swarmed her because she didn't have a sword yet. After trying to fend them off with her hoof, she was left running out as they chased her all the way to the surface and having to let them drown in the river outside her mine. As she made her way back to her base... "AH!" She jumped with a shout as one of the saplings suddenly sprouted right in front of her while she was still a bit on edge with the Silverfish. Going back down with a proper weapon and pick, she got the emeralds and decided to make things a bit more symmetrical from when she had to dig around it (unnerved by the sound of Silverfish that had spawned inside the walls...and found iron right there just one block out. OOC: Decided to put Twilight's name into minecraft and try to play like her and this happened. Session 96.2 Ardashir "Say, 'Pretty_Princess'," Spike smirked as Smolder squirmed in her chair, "will the rest of the 'Student Six' be joining us?" "Nah," Smolder said as she began casting all the buffing spells she could on everyone. She loved this game; it made her wish she could use magic in real life instead of just her boring old fire breath. "Stream has to visit with her family; Gallus just likes to watch and comment..." "You got that right," a familiar griffon's voice said over the headset speakers. "Hey, we can't all be heroes. Someone has to stand on the sidelines and criticize so you don't get swelled heads." "Anyway!" Smolder snorted as she cast her last few spells on Blackest_Flame. She knew it to be impossible but somehow the way the character jittered back and forth made Garble's in-game avatar look as jumpy as he could be in real life. "Sandbar and Yona are definitely not on a date, that's how they put it," she grinned as a few 'D'awwws' came through the connection, "and Ocellus is playing hide and go seek with Pavel and the pups." "Uhh," Smolder could hear the confusion in Spike's voice. "Aren't Ocellus and the Wolves a little old for hide and seek?" "Not really," Smolder finished her spellcasting in-game. She wondered if it took unicorns this long to do it. As she took her place behind the others, ready to cast spells to heal any damage taken by the turned-evil game's Garble, "Pavel and his pack need to learn how to hunt, and they say tracking Ocellus is difficult because of all the critters she can turn into. Confuses their smell or something. But they keep catching her, so Ocellus said she has a surprise for them." Spike wondered what the surprise was. An instant later the corrupted Garble was on them with a roar, swinging his axe, his stone elementals behind him. *** "Ocellus is not funny!" Pavel struggled against the webbing binding him. The giant blue and pink spider finished with him and crawled back into its web, where it resumed watching him balefully. He snarled at her, baring fangs. "Ocellus just mad Pavel can catch bug-pony every time!" The spider crawled along its web until it could poke at him with one claw. It must have liked what it felt, for it came closer, lightly prodding the Ice Wolf pup with its pedipalps. Beyond them fangs worked, dripping saliva. Pavel forced himself not to be afraid. He was just glad he knew this was Ocellus and not some Everfree monster! "Pavel is not afraid of silly giant spider disguise!" "What silly giant spider disguise?" Pavel choked. He looked to one side and saw Ocellus there, looking confused. Her eyes went wide as she looked at the spider. She swallowed and took a step back. "Uh, Pavel? Th-that's not me!" Pavel slowly turned and looked right into the spider's open jaws. It roared, fangs ready to rend. The next instant Pavel somehow escaped his webbing cocoon, snatched Ocellus, and fled down the trail back to Ponyville with her and without crossing the intervening space. All he left behind was a fading series of panicked yips as he ran. After they ended the spider turned back into Pharynx. He laughed. "Thorax may not want us use our powers like this, but Ocellus asked too nicely for me to say no. And scaring those silly wolves will never get old to me!" Session 96.3 Mtangalion The battle against the first raid boss wasn’t going so well. Each of the stone elementals split into two smaller ones when defeated, and soon vicious little pebble elementals were swarming everywhere. Then Garble the Fallen stopped pounding the tank and posed dramatically, axe raised to make a sweeping slash to his right. “That looks bad!” shouted pony Shining Armor. “Everycreature, dodge!” “Dodge what?” asked human Rainbow, still swinging away at the boss. Then an orange “Run away from the attack!” arc appeared on the floor… and disappeared almost immediately when Garble swung his axe, knocking half the raid back. “What the heck?! That was WAY too fast! There’s no way I could have run from that in time.” The boss roared and struck another pose, ready to make a tremendous slash to his left. “Never mind the warning markers on the floor!” yelled Sunset. “Can’t you see how he’s standing? He couldn’t possibly telegraph his attack more obviously!” “Yikes!” Human Gilda sprinted away. “Yeah, I see it!” Human Applejack blinked. “Oh, I get it now! He’s gonna…” Slash, BOOM! Half of the raid fell over, including her. “Do that...” “Run away, run away!” yelled human Pinkie Pie in an Olde Griffish accent. Of course, she’d dodged both attacks while barely paying attention. “Honestly,” said Princess Twilight, as they regrouped by the raid entrance. “It’s like you’ve never fought a giant monster before.” “Hey, I totally fought a giant Equestrian killer plant in real life,” protested human Rainbow. “And Gloriosa too… But raid bosses in this game aren’t supposed to fight like that!” Human Fluttershy gulped. “I guess... they do now.” They were interrupted by Gallus on their voice comm, snickering. “You won’t believe this… Somebody’s bragging in the forums about how they totally messed up the first boss for some noobs by getting their own characters killed on purpose.” “Really? I thought there was something fishy about those guys,” said human Shining Armor. “Good thing I already kicked them out of our raid group and reset the instance.” Human Rainbow grinned. “Hah! Those guys must really be a bunch of morons!” “I’ve allied myself with a bunch of morons!” bellowed Grogar, while Tirek, Cozy, and Chrysalis cowered behind their computer. “Spoiling a role-playing game that the heroes play for fun? Is that what passes for arch-villainy in this age?!” “Hey, I milked that for years,” complained Chrysalis. Grogar glowered at her. “But… of course, that wasn’t my main plan!” “Her main plans always fail miserably,” said Tirek to Cozy, ignoring Chrysalis getting more and more steamed beside him. “She should have stuck to annoying her foes to death!” “Enough!” Grogar sighed heavily. “If you’re going to spend valuable time on this scheme of yours, then do a proper evil job of it!” He grinned cruelly, then zapped the computer with his magic, bringing up a blacklisted hacking website. “Order a DDOS attack on their game, so that no one can log in and play at all!” Session 96.4 Mtangalion Lord Tirek stared at Grogar, scratching his head. "Dee dee..." Cozy Glow fluttered up to Grogar's eye level. "Golly gee, what's a DDOS? Is it magic spell?" Chrysalis groaned, rolling her eyes. "A Distributed Denial of Service Attack is a potent spell indeed, for disrupting the imported human technology that those pathetic ponies so adore! Though I admit, I'm surprised that an ancient fossil like Grogar has heard of it." Grogar snorted. "Did I not tell you before that I've spent millennia observing my enemies, laying my plans to defeat them and taking note of their every move!? It would do you well NOT to underestimate me!" He stamped his hoof hard enough to shake the very cavern, causing a closet door to creak open behind him... a closet which contained Grogar's bell, barely hidden by a few globs of changeling slime and an old newspaper. "My eye sees all, knows all!" bellowed Grogar. "Nothing escapes my notice!" Grogar took note of the panicked look on Tirek and Chrysalis's faces and grinned wickedly. "At last, some proper respect!" Behind him, Cozy Glow flapped her wings hard, straining to pull the bell out of the sticky slime and hide it. When it came loose, she went flying out of view with a crash... which caused Grogar to look over his shoulder, just in time to see nothing suspicious. Grogar snorted, annoyed by the distraction. "Arrange the attack as you see fit, but do not neglect your other assignments!" "Gosh, that was a close one!" said Cozy, after Grogar had stalked away. She tried to set the bell down, but the slime stuck to one of her forehooves, then the other one when she pried the first loose. Tirek glared at Chrysalis again. "Why, pray tell, did your idiot minion hide Grogar's accursed bell *here*?!" Chrysalis hissed, grinding her fangs. "When I get my hooves on Glowworm, he'll be explaining that in gruesome detail!" Session 96.5 Unown3 Prince Bramble was proud to look upon Everfree, protested from the axes of greedy ponies and minotaurs, the trees safe and sound. The deer prince's ears flick. "That sounds like... somedeer singing while drunk?" "Lalala-la-la!" Came a voice as a retro-50s spaceship flew down from the heavens... and smashed through several times obliterating them out of existence, the ship itself not hindered meaningfully, along with a few poor-misunderstood pony-eating "monsters" of Everfree, their carbon being absorbed in the "drunk" spaceman's storage bins... and then flew up back into the atmosphere, back into space, through a spacial rift, which closed behind it, never to return. "That's... THAT NOT FAIR!!" Bramble stomped a hoof at the destruction with no means of retaliation. (Inspired by something I saw from someone playing No Man's Sky Beyond, the guy wasn't actually drunk, but him singing and smashing his way through countless trees in his spaceship was too much! :-) ) Session 96.6 whitebearboy (Continued from 86.17) "I got it! I know how to Spare Toriel now." said human Fluttershy triumphantly. She repeatedly hit the 'Spare' option until the motherly goat woman, at last, relented. "Yes, I did it!" Fluttershy cheered. "Aww, she's giving me a hug good-bye." she said, looking adoringly and a bit sadly at the screen as Toriel hugged her character before Fluttershy made the human child walk out the door behind Toriel and down the passage leading out of the Ruins. "Oh no, it's that horrible Flowey again!" she gritted her teeth as the evil flower taunted her about what she'd do if she met a relentless killer and again told her it was kill or be killed in this world. "Just you wait, I'm going to get through this place, and I'm not going to kill any monsters." Fluttershy said determinedly as Flowey called himself "the prince of this world's future" and sank back into the ground. Walking over the grassy mound the flower had been on, she walked her avatar out of the Ruins to find herself in a snowy forest. "Hmm, now how are there trees and snow underground?" she wondered as she made the human child proceed forward through the wintery woods. Session 96.7 Unown3 and Mtangalion "OUR QUEEN HAS LAID AN EGG! ThE ROYAL LINE IS SECURE! IT IS TIME FOR MUCH REJOICING!" Came the cries of griffin guards. Gilda screeched, "YOU! YOU DID THIS TO ME!" Gerold stood his ground, retreat was INVITING hostile pursuit in griffin culture, "Beautiful, YOU claimed ME, remember?" Gilda replied, "Heh. Remember the time I went all mother hen?" Gerold replied, "You're not gonna go crazy again, are you babe?" "... Nah. Actually, I think I'm good." She gathered the egg to her flank to keep it warm. "It's funny... I've been making Griffonstone better because a sucky Griffonstone is an insult to our pride as griffons. But now..." Gerold puts a wing around her. "Feels different, doesn't it?" "Yeah..." Gerold's mobile phone chirpped. "Uh... Don't explode or anything, but... there's photos of this on Preddit already." Gilda lifted a paw and clenches her talons. "Oh really, now..." There was a flash of light, an a teenage griffin appeared holding a scroll. "Prince Firebug was right! It worked!" He spotted Gilda with the egg. "Uhhh, I might have gone too far back... Just pretend you didn't see it alright!" She hid the scroll behind her back, and disappeared. "Well, at least the Pink Dweep will know what color to make the cake," Gilda groaned. "Who am I kidding? She'd already know." +++ The griffin reappeared where she started from. "How'd it go?" Asked a purple earth pony mare with a smiling cherry apple cutie mark, standing next to her half sister. "Overshot it Cherry Apple!" +++ "Hey girls, hey Sunset, nice of you to visit, now that we know a whole buncha humans turned ponies won't result in the space-time continuum collapsing," Princess Twilight nodded. Sunset Shimmer and the humane seven (plus Spike the Dog turned dragon), where in the Friendship Crystal Castle... along with human Flash Sentry. AND human Trixie had tagged along after much nagging ("I wanna learn more about real magic! I wanna I wanna I wannna!!!") It was a large entourage, but pony Pinkie Pie had been prepared. "So you're going too be supreme ruler of Equestria? I think Celestia and Luna would give you a century of breathing room before they returned. Heck, I'm surprised Luna is retiring after only what, nine years back? What was the point of her adjusting back to her duties to begin with?" Sunset asked. "It doesn't make a lick of sense to me either, but if they want to retire there's not much I can do about it." Princess Twilight said. "Speaking of which, I'd like you girls to attend my coronation. You were as much a part of my growth and learning as anypony else!" "Really? Thanks!" Sunset hugged Twilight. That was there as a glow from Sunset Shimmer... that spread the other Humane Seven, each one had a different glow from their chests. "Uh-oh." "What do you mean 'uh-oh'?!" Princess Twilight exclaimed. "Remember how the Element of Magic acted strange when taken to the human world?... I didn't really think how the geodes might act strange if brought to the pony world..." Then the light from the humane seven... split in two... creating the geodes... and a new set of Element of Harmony. Princess Twilight looked down, "Well... this is going to make my 'Elements of Harmony were destroyed' speech to the public awkward... Wait a minute, why are there SEVEN!?" Indeed... there was now a SEVENTH Element of Harmony there. Sunset grinned awkwardly. "I think... that's Empathy? Or Trust? I read up on in the forbidden library... it's a long story..." "But... whose worthy of it?" Twilight found herself thinking. Her mind running through candidates. Spike? Starlight Glimmer? Trixie!? (Twilight dreaded the last one, Trixie's ego was big enough.) "Well..." Sunset rubbed the back of her head. "I promise to try not to think any venomous 'it should have been mine!' thoughts like I did with Cadence, who I may or may not have been planning to 'make it look like an accident'... So yeah! We accept!" "A pleasure!" Trixie grinned. "Who said you were invited?" Human AJ asked. "Princess Twilight didn't say I WASN'T invited!" Princess Twilight of course, was WAAAAY too nice to 'uninvite' Trixie now that she'd assumed she already was. "Really? Thanks!" Lemon Zest cheered, the other Shadowbolts behind her in pony form. "WHEN DID YOU GET HERE?!" Sunset Shimmer exclaimed. "Well, I've already invited Ponythulu (mostly because NOT sending an invite is MORE likely to cause a disaster, and inviting Dra-Gon of course would have been even worse), and Chrysalis' mother, so I guess the 'could have been friends, but squandered the chance' of my alternate self can too." Sungar Coat said, "That's a fair description of us." "Do you think there are some magical dodads out there for us to find?" Indigo Zap asked. She'd gone by that name for so long, had dyed her hair for so long, that calling herself 'Lightning Dust' felt awkward now. ++++ "How soon until they're ready?" Chrysalis asked, overlooking her swarm, hatched from her own eggs, pure and true changelings. "THey'll be ready for battle soon my queen," Locust bowed his head. The changelings performing matching martial arts moves. Also playing a changeling vs ponies first person shooter with a maps of Canterlot and Ponyville, taking turns playing as attackers AND defenders, so they'd know the battle inside and out once it came. "But my queen, shouldn't we worry that playing the other side in a first person shooter will normalize the enemy and make the changelings more receptive to their point of view?" "That is the most banal, insane, paranoid, pathetic, and childish idea I have heard in my life, and doesn't deserve anymore exposure than that!" Chrysalis struck an indignant pose. - Meanwhile, at Twilight's castle, both Pinkie Pies felt their bodies shudder and and ear flops... They looked at each other and echoed, "Someone who really really hates us just said something that we'd totally agree with? Yeah." Then 'human' Pinkie Pie said. "Hey! Gummy's alive now!" - Meanwhile, Chrysalis' other two children, one 'Chrysalis-lite-wannabe' filly and one 'too pudgy for his own good' colt, ran around the track provided for them, the changeling coach whipping them into shape, LITERALLY. "On our break can we whip you?" Asked the pudgy colt huffing and puffing. "Nope." "Not fair!" Little Papa watched and clapped, sticking literally to her mother's side. "My queen! I have a gift for you!" Said Glowworm, eager to redeem himself from his queen's fury. He pushed what LOOKED LIKE the mane six at first glance to their knees before Chrysalis, except their cutie marks and coloring were off. And around their necks were black collars with emeralds. Mean Twilight looked in impotent fury at the queen. "No games this time," Chrysalis hissed. "From now on, you all do, as I ORDER YOU TO do... slaves." Green lightning went from the collar all over Mean Twilight's body she collasped to the floor. "... Yes... Your Majesty." Mean Twilight said through clenched teeth, tears of rage in her eyes. "NEVER AGAIN!" She quickly grabbed a spear and tried to run herself through it... only for the shock of the collar to stop her. "No," Chrysalis said simply. "You don't die until I say you die!" The other Mean Six cowered in horror. "I'm not scared at all," Mean AJ said. Mean Rarity, who had been born wanting everything, now had nothing, even her own life wasn't hers to possess. She hugged herself. "Yes... my queen..." Mean Twilight said, her eyes hidden by her mane. - In a fortress city in a realm of darkness and shadows... a donkey gasped as the image of Grogar appeared on a magic mirror. "MASTER! Is it time?!" "Not yet... but soon... Tambleon is will return to Equestria, and with it our might. Equestria will never know what hit it!" "I will have everything ready master! I swear!" Bray bobbed his head up and down. "Your army and monsters will be set like a crossbow bolt to strike at the heart of the ponies!" "DEATH TO EQUESTRIA! CHAINS, THE ROCK, AND THE LIGHTNING TO THE PONIES!" Called the forces waiting outside Grogar's palace. - Grogar repeated a ritual he'd done before... and again, King Sombra came forth... except this time... There was the collar around his neck, with an eye fashioned gem around it. Sombra cried out as he tried to use his magic. "If you want to kill me and take my power all for yourself, become stronger." Grogar said simply. "No loyalties to confuse, and let your desire to kill me make your stronger... But I know you hate the Crystal Ponies far more than you hate me. Though I do promise... promise the Crystal Empire will be the Umbrum's to bring despair onto the crystal ponies who persecuted your kind." King Sombra did what he'd never done to anyone but his mother Rabia, he bowed. _ "And that should do it!" Cozy Glow said, having finished a cursed unholy symbol drawn in red on the cavern floor. "And what is that about?" Tirek asked. "Just calling in some family," Cozy Glow. "What? Let me guess, a cookie baker and a stuffed bear maker?" "Oh no," Cozy Glow shook her head not losing her cheerful demeanor. "I'm not exactly a pony. My father was a demon in equine form that carried the First King of Evil on his back, and my mother was a jackal diamond dog. So I don't really have a drop of pony blood in me." A ring of fire appeared and dark figured appeared. "Hiii!" Cozy Glow waved at her own kind. - "So... interested in revenge?" Came Grogar's message over video chat. "We've tried revenge twice already, and it failed," Aria Blaze said. "What can you offer us that OUR OWN GOD couldn't?" "The oceans will be yours again to freely explore, your homes will be yours again, the sirens will rule the oceans. And Dra-Gon and Hydra will be the only god worshipped beneath the waves." ++++ "Thanks for helping with my custody case for Scootaloo Starlight," Rainbow Dash said. "You came to the right mare. I have a lot of legal experiences... it's how my family wasn't sued into oblivion in a civil case by all the families of my converts." "Didn't Twilight's 'work release' thing take care of that?" "A legal trial is different from a civil trial Rainbow Dash." "Oh." +++ "Hey Discord," Apple Bloom shouted. "We want your help!" "You WANT the help of the god of chaos? Okay, this is interesting enough for me this time... " The fact Discord's games had FAILED to give the CMC their cutie marks that one time had remained a smudge on his record, and he was eager to balance it out SOMEHOW. "With Dash fighting to keep me as her adopted filly," Scootaloo said. "It made me realize. Me, Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle... it's like our adventures happen in a completely separate universe or something! ... We're hoow Cozy Glow GOT INTO the Friendship School to begin with... but it was Smolder and the rest who actually stopped her. All we did was get stuck in a closet. And... well..." "WE'RE SICK OF BEING USELESS IN EMERGENCIES!" Sweetie Belle shouted. "Our big sister risk their lives all the time, we've grown up more, but we still can never contribute anything, even when it was OUR OWN MESS TO CLEAN UP! And when the bad guy was ANOTHER FILLY! We... We want your help so next time the bad guys cause trouble... we can actually help." "ME TOO!" Button Mash said with a smile. "I heard human me got to do all sorts of cool stuff! I want to be able to do cool stuff too!" "Me three..." Diamond Tiara said, dragging Silver Spoon along for the ride. "Me four I guess," Silver Spoon said. Session 96.8 sonicandmario826 Grogar set up similar ruins as he did with Sombra only a pile of shattered stones seemed to be in them. Grogar used his magic to summon the Staff of Sacanas brimming with the magic of the Storm King. The magic of the ruins brought the pieces of stone together forming the figure of the Storm King. His face still showed the fear he felt when he turned to stone and before he took his last fall. Grogar places the staff in on of the statue’s hand and magic began crackling around the statue. The statue’s eyes shined blue and the statue began cracking. The Storm King broke through his statue prison laughing, clutching the staff, and shooting lighting from it as he laughed. Grogar interrupted his laughing, “If you want to reclaim the kingdom you lost and revenge on Twilight and her friends then join me and we’ll crush them beneath our hooves.” “Sound great pops, but I’m kind of a free agent. Don’t really go for the villain teamup-“ he was quickly interrupted when Grogar used his magic to bring him up to his face and his eyes glowed a deep red. “Join me, or you’ll wish you were broken to pieces again!!!” Grogar snarled. The Storm King was shaken, “Right... right. But *ahem* if we’re going to do this I have to go get some of my men. Not all of them were the poor misunderstood types who want to frolic with prissy ponies.” Session 96.9 Ardashir In her room at the Friendship School, Alisa shook the prison-ball she'd imprisoned Sombra's soul in. She sniffed at it and recited every spell she knew. Nothing. The Diamond Wolf whimpered in fear. Who could have snatched the Crystal Tyrant away from her trap? Who was that powerful? *** "Hey, Decepticolt!" Zappityhoof pointed at her computer screen. "Look at this. Someone is 'asking' us to interfere in World of Horsecraft." "Didn't we have enough trouble with that?' Goldcap grumbled. Then her eyes focused on the message on her screen, as well as the payment. They went wide. "Maybe second time's the charm?" "For what this guy is offering," Decepticolt rubbed her hands together in glee, "I'm ready to take a chance!" *** "Okay! Dodge again!" Applejack and the other front line fighters moved out of the corrupted Garble's range as he swung his axe. They had his attack pattern now. "Now rush him!" The charged in and sent their best attacks home. Garble roared, stumbled, dropped his axe... And the screen suddenly cut to luridly pornographic images intermingled with shots of butchered horses. "GAAH!" The scream rose as one from the players on both sides of the mirror, along with gagging sounds here and there. "Urrgh!" Garble spat to the side, his spittle hissing as it ate into the stone floor. "Even when I hated ponies and wanted to level Equestria, I didn't think of doing stuff like that!" He tuned away from the computer screen and raced for a handy bucket. "What the hay?" Dash tried to get away from the screen but couldn't. "We were about to win!" "Is this somepony's sick joke?" Rarity turned paler than usual at some of what she saw before she threw a sweater over her computer screen. "What kind of depraved mind comes up with things like this?" "What?!?" Sunset did some quick checking. Beside her Sci-Twi joined in, brow furrowed as she ran through every diagnostic and checked every security feature she had. Sunset did the same, and after several moments sank back, temporarily defeated. She said over the headset, "Guys, this is happening to everyone online with the game, not just us! Someone is doing a cyberattack on CrystalSoft!" Spike, both Spikes groaned. "Can this possibly get any worse?" He flinched as multiple voices from several different species yelled,"Don't say it!" And then it did get worse. A new screen opened up on the site, listing the contact information for every single member of both groups. And as it did a voice-over said, "Hey, kiddies! Maybe now you'll get out of your mom's basement and get some fresh air! And if not, well, if you must know who's to blame for losing this sorry excuse for a real life, here are their names and addresses! You might want to tell them how you feel about it. Toodles!" "Guys," Sunset called over her headset, "everyone get offline before --" She slumped as she saw the hits coming in from angry gamers. Dozens, then hundreds, then thousands. "Too late." Session 96.10 Mtangalion Outside the Crusader Clubhouse, Discord flinched, feeling his fur standing on end. “Wait, wait just a moment now…” He pointed a claw at the Cutie Mark Crusaders and their friends. “You’re all resolved to help, to WIN the coming battles.” He counted out six claws on just his eagle paw somehow. “And there’s six of you!” The draconequus paced in midair. “I did not see this coming so soon. Not I would have… actually planning for the future is so dull…” Apple Bloom blinked. “Um… you didn’t see what coming?” “Can you help us?” asked Button Mash earnestly. “I can spend a Discord Favor if it’ll help!” “Oh, we’ve gone far beyond favors,” muttered Discord. He cleared his throat. “Funny story! Not so long ago, the talking monkey version of you…” He raised his lion paw, holding up an image of the human Button Mash. “Became a virtual god of gaming in an augmented reality world! When that world ended, the power didn’t just go away, oh no. It found the nearest compatible magical host. You.” Button’s eyes widened. “M-me?!” “Yes, YOU!” Discord laughed and threw his arms wide. “And you didn’t even notice! Now that was a fine joke indeed! The trouble is… Well, let’s just say that once your pocket monster evolves, you can’t go on keeping it crammed in your pocket for very much longer. I sealed you once…” He snapped his claws, getting only a few sparks. “But with the end of canon fast approaching, that’s not going to work again!” A strange breeze started to gust, and thunder rumbled… from a clear blue sky. Discord whipped out a PKE meter, and it immediately beeped, lighting up like a Hearth’s Warming tree. “And considering the storm of Harmony that’s about to be unleashed, I urgently need to be elsewhere. See you soon!” Discord rolled himself up like a window shade and vanished. Button Mash lifted a foreleg, rubbing his belly. “Girls? I feel…” Sweetie Belle rushed to his side. “You don’t feel so good?!” “No, actually I feel... excited!” said Button. “Like I’m about to break a record high score!” The wind gusted hard, lifting the foals off the ground. “Whoa!” cried Diamond. “Hey!” shouted Silver Spoon, trying in vain to keep her hair from getting mussed. Scootaloo spread her wings, surfing the breeze. “Cool!” With a snap-flash of rainbow magic, brand new Crusader cloaks appeared on each of the girls, and a magic seal appeared on the grass below them, with Button Mash’s D-Pad cutie mark in the center and the other five cutie marks in a circle around it. Button’s propeller beanie spun faster and faster until everything whited out. Then the storm was gone, and the foals all dropped to the ground, grunting or rolling to one side, except for Scootaloo, who glided down… and Button Mash, who hovered down until his hooves gently touched the earth. “Um, girls?” Button asked shakily. “What just happened?” His small horn sparked, and colt-sized wings unfurled from his flanks. Oblivious, he opened his game window from a previous Discord Favor and started paging through different screens. “Did we get a stat upgrade?” “WHAT!?” bellowed Diamond. “Why does he… and I didn’t… Daddy always said that *I’m* his little princess!” Silver hid her smile with a hoof. “You know you don’t have to be the first at everything, Di. Just the best.” Sweetie Belle still hadn’t picked her jaw up off the ground. Discord reappeared with a sombrero and a lively Mexicolt mariachi band. “First!” He pinched Button’s cheeks. “This time, I get to say it! Welcome to the world, Isthmia, Prince of Gaming! Ooh, I can sing you a song too and really steal Celestia’s thunder.” “What are you talking about Discord?” asked Button. “Prince of… huh?” The newly minted Alicorn colt froze, then fluttered his wings and touched his horn. Then he clapped his hooves to his cheeks, cried “Auuuuuugh!!” and passed out. Session 96.11 Wolfram-and-Hart (with a minor edit) "Perfect." There was a flash and a naisly voiced stallion in a suite and glasses appeared, flanked by two bulky pegasi. "Now he'll be easier to deal with." "Who are these guys?" Scootaloo asked. "Trouble." Discord sneered. "I am Red Tape. These are my enforcers, Cease and Desist." "These jokers were originally guardians of the various worlds like the wolfy buddy another Sweetie Belle's knows. But then became too obsessed with hoarding their own world and keeping even the smallest likeness of anything from one world appearing in another." Discord glared at the offending entities in pony form. "Then, Morning Star ended up championing their cause and reforged them into Creation's first lawyers. I can't tell you how many timelines they've stagnated with their unyielding greed for ideas that they consider their property. They once tried to have the Elders erase a timeline because they thought it stole the concept for a single being." "And now it ends. With the finale coming, we are not missing this chance to expunge this imperfection any longer." Red Tape looked at the unconscious new alicorn. "This being was never meant to be in this capacity, and we're sending him to Entropy now before he wrecks anything else." 'But he's an alicorn! You can't erase him without erasing a whole concept of reality! Isn't that against what you're trying to protect?!" Diamond demanded. "Wait, how do I know that?" Red Tape shook his head. "No, we are trying to protect what's OURS! Your reality is not our concern." "I won't let you take him!" Sweetie Belle stood in front of Button Mash. "Fine, we'll get rid of you too." Red Tape motioned for Cease and Desist to take action. "I think you might want to reconsider." The fillies and Discord turned to see Button Mash stand up and glare at the offending ponies. "I'm not reconsidering anything. You need to be dealt with." "You don't want to do this." Button Mash repeated. "If you don't come quietly, we'll sue to get this whole timeline erased. You're making a big mistake." Red Tape said, taking an intimidating step forward. "Well, so are you! You just got a new god mad!" Without another word, Button's horn ignited and zapped the three intruders right off their hooves. "Whoa, pretty cool, huh? The New Alicorn tutorial in my head told me how to do that! A good game always plays fair, and gives the player hints for a tough boss fight. I thought you three looked familiar, and now I know why! You're ripoffs of other characters yourselves!" "W-what?!" Red Tape gasped. "That's impossible! We're the guardians of intellectual property! We've always existed!" "Then, explain this to me." Button turned to Discord. "Can you open a window to dimension 9F02?" "Um, OK." Discord frowned in confusion and ripped a hole open in space and time. The ponies, draconequess and otherworldly entities looked through the portal and were shocked to see yellow hairless monkeys that looked exactly like Red Tape, Cease and Desist having a conversation about copyright with an elementary school principal about a line in a school fair banner. "You three are rip offs of thse three from that dimension. You're even more guilty of what you've been accusing other timelines of doing!" Button Mash grinned. "But... but... but we have to protect our property!" Red Tape whined. "Ideas aren't meant to belong to one pony forever. If every idea for a story was as hoarded away as you want, there'd never be another story ever. What matters is what you do with the story." Button Mash glared at the three self proclaimed guardians. "Now, get out of my universe!" A pixelated sword appeared in Button's hoof. With a loud barttle cry, that sounded less cool than it did in his head, he swung the sword and the magic blast sent the three primoridial lawyers flying out of their timeline. Button Mash, Isthmia, Prince of Gaming smugly sheathed the sword. "Copyright expired." Session 96.12 Unown3 "DISCORD HAVE YOU GONE CRAZY?! I MEAN! Ugh! Have you gone from crazy to stupid?! You turned Button Mash into an Alicorn?! A COLT?!" Princess Twilight demanded. "We're dealing with someone who just sabotaged the WoH servers and pinned the blame on Sunset and our friends and the rest of our party! It's been nothing but hate mail!" "I didn't turn him into an Alicorn, that's beyond my power believe it or not. Enjoy that Twilight, because that's the only time in admitting I can't do something! If I could, you'd have SIX new underage Alicorns running around right now! Blame the sirens and their 'argument reality, transform the town into more sirens' scheme! All the power that THAT world's Button Mash gained had to go somewhere after the augmented reality shut down." "I hate to say it... but shouldn't it have gone to the human world Button Mash? Not that that would have actually been better, but still..." "What can I say? When you flushed the system of all that siren magic, some got swept along for the ride. The CMC+3 want to be useful next time villains strike, and Button Mash happened to be the one who was a sealed Alicorn." "WHAT villains? We're redeeming villains left and right... which is... kinda getting a little scary and strange... like Starlight Glimmer was sneaking out and hunting them down and brainwashing them to be redeemed when nobody was watching." Starlight Glimmer's eyes shifted with a nervous grin. "Now Twilight's, that's just silly. Why wouldn't a dragon who swore to plunder Equestria and burn it to the ground really just have a tough guy act to hide his sensitive side?" Session 96.13 Ardashir Later that day, deep in the Friendship Dungeon, Starlight Glimmer stood before Sludge, Clump, Fume, and Fizzle. The four dragons stared at her, their pupils shrunk to pinpricks, as her horn glowed in spellcasting. "Fiducia compellus, cogeria, and persuaderi," Starlight furrowed her brow as she worked the spell. The dragons slumped as the spells worked on their minds. Starlight smiled to see them relaxing. "There! Worked with Garble, it worked with you." "Yes, Mistress Glimmer," the four mumbled. "Command us, Mistress Glimmer." Starlight preened for a second before catching herself. "Ahem! First of all, no more 'Mistress Glimmer'. You'll act normally except when it conflicts with my commands alright?" She thought back to earlier events with Twilight's friends. "Yeah, I learned my lesson there. Okay, now all of you, behave yourselves from now on, alright? No eating the castle, no fighting with ponies, treat others with respect and don't be ashamed of your artistic side." She turned to walk away and hesitated, "Eh what do dragons do for art? Besides poetry, I mean." All four answered as one. "Fire breathing competitions!" "Uh!" Starlight gulped. "Okay, maybe not so much on the art. But obey my other commands, and --" She fell silent as Spike entered the room. "Oh, so this is where you guys are? Twilight told me to tell you to clean the upstairs bathrooms, and..." He looked at them and Starlight, eyes narrowing in suspicion. "Wait. What are you doing down here?" "Us? Heh, what we're doing?" Starlight gulped and suddenly, "Dragon games! That's it!" "Dragon games?" Spike scratched his head. "What dragon games?" "Oh, Clump is going to show me," Starlight pointed over her withers at the brown scaly lump. He looked dully at her. She turned and faced him, "Okay, Clump. Show me a dragon game." "Okay. How about Dragon Thump?" "Dragon Thump?" Starlight blinked. "Okay. Show it to me." "Dragon." Clump raised one claw as he spoke, holding it over her head. He made a fist ad slammed it into the top of her head. "Thump!" Spike walked over to Starlight where she lay on the floor after the konk on the head. "Uhh, you okay?" Starlight feebly nodded. He left, and the other four followed him out. "Note for the future," Starlight groaned as she lay there. "No command spell is foolproof." Session 96.14 Mtangalion Starlight Glimmer cast a headache cure spell on herself, followed by a healing spell for the bump on her head, quickly regaining her confidence. “Once again, magic fixes everything!” The unicorn trotted smugly towards the Friendship Dungeon’s exit. “I really don’t see why Twilight and the others make such a big deal out of…” A scaly red paw slammed against the crystal wall, making Starlight squeak and jump back. “So!” roared Garble, barring her way. “Back when you chanted all those fancy words at *me*, you weren’t just making a lame joke. You really were trying to magic me into a namby-pamby pony-lover!” He glowered down at her, snorting foul-smelling soot. “I should teach you a lesson right now about what happens when you mess with dragons!” Starlight backpedaled, her heart racing. “You… you shouldn’t remember that!” She charged her horn for an instant random teleport. “Nope, no you don’t!” said Garble, quickly reaching out and flicking her horn to disrupt the spell. Apparently, even he could learn a thing or two, hanging around ponies long enough. “We’re not done talking, ‘Glim Glam.’” Starlight closed her eyes and shouted the first thing she could think of that might save her. “I order you not to touch me! Or harm me! Or whatever else you’re thinking of doing to me, you scaly brute!” She peeked an eye open. “Eeep!” … as the scaly red brute… patted her on the nose. Garble grinned toothily. “Boop.” Starlight’s legs trembled until she had to sit her hindquarters down. “Wha… Bwah… No, no… Think!” She did a passive magical scan, and her eyes widened. “My mind control failed because you were already under a stronger mind control spell!” She furrowed her brow, analyzing. “Not pony magic… feels more like… of course!” Starlight pointed a hoof. “Dragon Lord Ember must have used the Bloodstone Scepter on you when she made you ambassador, ordering you to be nice to ponies!” Garble blinked, seeming momentarily dumbfounded. “That’s not…” He coughed into a fist. “I mean… Yeah, you’re pretty smart! You totally figured it out! Ahem… Let that be a lesson to you, and stuff! I’ll be keeping an eye on you, pony!” A little later, Spike was happily occupied in his room, sorting and cataloging his hoard… er, comic book collection. He glanced up, hearing the door open. “Hey, Garble! I just got the Dragon Morphers annual issue! Wanna… Huh?” Without a word, Garble hoisted Spike into the air and gave him a great big hug, patting the smaller dragon on the back before putting him down again. “Heh, sounds fun. We can laugh about how they get everything about dragons wrong.” Spike blinked. “Dude! Uh, what was that for?” Garble winked. “I’m not supposed to say. Duh!” “Wait, you don’t mean…” Spike giggled. “Is that command I gave you when I was the Dragon Lord still on you? I’ll talk to Ember. I’m sure she can remove it.” Garble froze, then waved his paws. “Wha? No, don’t do that, Spike! Really, I’m fine with it now!” Garble grinned sharply, fangs gleaming. “In fact… I can honestly say I’m a better dragon today because of it.” Session 96.15 (somewhat adult humor, well, 'adult', anyway, inspired by something I actually saw on a No Man's Sky video.) "Wow! This update to No Mare's Sky is something else! The VR is great!" Spike said excitedly. Twilight said, "According to this update patch, they've also made the animals more realistic too." "Really?" Spike said looking upwards as he stood underneath a weird lizard creature with just two legs as it shook its body a little and shook its tail. - "SPIKE! Come out there! Trixie needs her beauty bath!" "Spike! It was virtual reality! Not real! It didn't even HAVE touch or smell!" Twilight exasperated. "I can feel it on me!" Spike scrubbed until his scales gleamed and Rarity had to wear sunglasses to look at his frame. Session 96.16 Mtangalion with a bit by me Boom! “Waaaaagh!” Thud, bam bam BAM! The small herd of fillies raced through the outskirts of Sweet Apple Acres, following the trail of trees that had a certain colt’s silhouette punched through them. Apple Bloom groaned. “Where the heck is Button flyin’ to now?” “Straight towards Ponyville!” shouted Scootaloo. “I’ll head him off!” The orange filly buzzed her wings as she galloped, almost lifting off, but then she fell behind, gasping for air. “Why can’t I… Oh, right!” Scootaloo tapped her pink hoofband twice, and magic flashed, transforming her back into a young dragoness who easily took to the air. “Woohoo!” Diamond Tiara rolled her eyes. “Who else thinks that Miss Starlight should have mind-controlled Scootaloo into doing her physical therapy exercises, instead of building her a magic cheat bracelet?” Scootaloo the dragoness doubled back and hovered over them, arms folded impishly. “Hey, it’s not a cheat! I’m just… um… effectively using every available resource! Like Daring Do when she found that garden with the cursed statues in Daring Do and the Curse of Carnival Cat! Besides, it’s not like I’m the only one having flying issues.” At that moment, Button Mash went rocketing past them, fast enough to whip all their manes and leaving a pixelated rainbow in his wake. “Ahh, I can’t stop! Everypony, watch out!” Discord appeared in a flash. “Oh, for love of…” He snapped his fingers, and Button bounced off the Ponyville Spa instead of smashing through. He bounced off building after building, making them go “Ping!” and light up like a pinball machine, until the little Alicorn colt finally skidded to a stop. Discord appeared next to Button in another flash, now dressed as a stern police-human from the world beyond the portal mirror. “Young pony, do you have any idea how fast you were going?” Sweetie Belle reached Button next, grasping his hoof to help him up. “Are you okay? Button, what happened to the Alicorn tutorial in your head that you talked about?” Button Mash blushed. “Well, the section on flying just says ‘Have fun trying all the different maneuvers you discover.’ So yeah, classic useless help guide...” A winged shadow fell over them all, and Princess Twilight landed. “Button Mash?” Her eyes widened, seeing that yes, he did have a colt-sized horn in front of his propeller beanie, and matching wings. “Wow, it’s really strange being on the other end of this. Wait… I don’t have to sing you a song, do I? Oh no, I don’t have anything prepared!” “Don’t worry,” said Silver Spoon, smirking. “Discord already took care of that.” Button chuckled. “Yeah, it was great! It had lots of accordions and silly noises!” Apple Bloom shrugged. “Cheese Sandwich helped.” “Riiight,” said Twilight. “Normally, I wouldn’t put you on the spot so soon, but Discord said that you’re the Alicorn of Gaming now, and… I can’t believe I’m saying this… our World of Horsecraft friends are really in a jam.” Button Mash struck a dramatic pose, and the “Quest accepted!” sound effect played from nowhere. “You can count on me, Princess Twilight! Um…” He twitched his wings. “But maybe we should *walk* to your castle.” Twilight said, "Don't worry, I know all about this sort of thing." FLASH BACK! Soon after Twilight's ascension. "Oh what a cute kitty Fluttershy!" Twilight patted the kitten on the head, her new Earth Pony Strength accidentally making her knock the insanely cute kitten not just through the table, but creating a hole in the floor! "Uh, whoops?" Twilight said awkwardly and inching back as Fluttershy gave her the death glare. "You mean your trouble flying?" Button Mash asked. "Yes, totally my trouble flying," Princess Twilight said with a rigid grin. Session 96.17 Ardashir As the ponies and others waited for World of Horsecraft to be repaired, they sought other forms of amusement. For Spike, that meant his pulp magazines. "'The insectoid abomination laughed as her loyal chitinous minions, looking nothing like those tootie-fruitie traitors, transformed into innocent ponies, the innocent ponies whose life force they had devoured!'" Spike couldn't help it, he imitated her evil laugh. "'Now, my monstrous servitors', she rubbed her claws together greedily,' we shall conquer and consume all of Equestria!' They left her presence as she returned to her usual form of Princess Cada --" Spike shuddered as he heard familiar hoofsteps coming down the hall. "Spike! Where are you, I need you to help me, we may have found a solution to the Horsecraft problem." Twilight trotted through the Friendship Palace, a still confused Button Mash close behind. Students stared in shock at the sight of an alicorn colt as Twilight called, "SPIKE! You better not be looking at those trashy magazines again!" "Wuuah!" The little dragon leaped into the air and breathed fire, sending the magazine flying off. The last he saw of it was the cover with the words Witch Queen of the Invisible Empire vanish into a ball of green fire. He faceclawed. "Oh, man! The special collector's issue too! Maybe I can get it back from Princess Celestia later --" His voice died in his throat as a glow of purple magic picked him up. He turned in mid-air to face a frowning Twilight. "You were reading those trashy things again?!?" She snorted, scraping the floor with one forehoof. "Spike, I told you to stay away from them! Those things will rot your mind, they're so unrealistic." She turned and trotted out, Spike floating behind her and the alicorn Button Mash following. "Now come on, we're going to be using Button Mash's alicorn gamer pony magic to restore a clear connection with the human world I visit through the magic mirror so we can play a computer game that somehow near-perfectly mimics our lives." Spike struggled to escape. "No you don't!  You need to spend some time doing normal things." *** Elsewhere, Queen Chrysalis sniffed as she broke the weakening magical connection with the little dragon. "Ugh, I established that years ago to spy on him and them and I keep forgetting about it. Now whenever I do look he's reading comics, playing games, or studying 'how to be a dragon' with those new scaly pets of Twilight's." She sighed. "But at least someone is enjoying my stories." "You write for pulp magazines?" Cozy Glow looked like she was about to die laughing. Chrysalis sniffed. "I've been locked out of the Hive's bank accounts set up behind false fronts, I have to make some bits somehow." Session 96.18 Unown3 BEEP-BEEP-BEEP!! BEEP! BEEP-BEEP-BEEP!! BEEP! "Uh oh!" "What do you mean 'uh oh', Doctor?" Roseluck had learned 'uh oh' with the Doctor was never a good thing. "Oh, uh! Nothing! Just this cute little universe has gone off its cute little axis, and lost its cute little connection to its cute little mother universe, resulting in a causality divergence both retroactive and progressive." "Uh, in Equine?" "I was speaking Equine! And I'm saying that this universe, has lost its metaphysical tether to the primary universe that spawned it. Meaning that it's no longer connected directly to the events that do or do not happen in the primary universe! Meaning anything can happen! Anything COULD HAVE happened! Retroactively!" "Oh." Session 96.19 Unown3 and Ardashir "Speaking of making ends meet," Chrysalid said. "WORK FASTER SLAVES! These hentai manegas need to be on the streets of Neighpon on Monday!" Chrysalis cracked the whip. Mean Pinkie Pie hunched over an artist's table, "On our break can we whip you?" "NO!" WHIP! Meaniejack exasperated, "Well, Ah certainly ain't confused by this here description!" Mean Twilight cringed in disgust, "What kind of walleyed chimp wrote this description? It makes no sense at all! Not even those creepy hikkikomori could get aroused by this!" Chrysalis: "Hah! Shows how much you know! I got a lot of meals at those manega cons this way!" Chrysalis transformed into OH SWEET INARI WHAT IS THAT?!? The Mean Six vomited all over their tables. "That's coming out of your pay." "You aren't paying us!" MeanShy snapped. "Then I suggest you hurry before I find other way to make you pay!" WHIP! Session 96.20 Unown3 Cozy Glow asked, "So you have family members all named after dark emotion and vices? Rage? Hatred? AKA Ira and Rabia?" "My little sister and my mother yes," Sombra nodded, still hoofing at the collar around his neck. "With the power of my whole family, Equestria would be conquered in a day." Chrysalis said, "Don't trust him, one Umbrum is dangerous enough. His entire diseased family tree would reduce Equestria to a wasteland of despair, my children can't feed on despair." -- Mean Dash grunted as she was carried on a stretcher, okay, dragged more than carried, and the hard stone floor than a stretcher. She was worked on the small minority of changelings trained as medics in Chrysalis' new army... Getting her back into tip top shape, okay, more like patched back together, and made to be a glorified punching bag for Chrysalis' new brood of minions. She'd inherited the 'real' Rainbow Dash's fighting prowess, making her perfect 'practice' for the changeling army. Over, and over, and over, and OVER! -- "Didn't a couple evil doubles of us move into that creepy old house on the edge of town?" Pinkie Pie asked. "Meh, I bet they went on some cross country quest to find themselves, or something." -- In Manehatten, Clone Pinkie Pie held up a sign, 'Welcome Fellow Uniquely Born Ponies!' but there was no sigh of the Mean Six. -- Meanie Pie fell to the ground, huffing and puffing. Chrysalis' overweight son gave her a sharp kick to the ribs. "More!" Meanie Pie pushed herself up, made to carry the heavy weight of the spoiled Changeling Prince around around and around around... Meanjack said matter of fact, "Mom is so totally gonna let us live once she's done with us." Mean Twilight snarled, "You think I don't know that! I hate that bi-" The collar shocked her with green lightning. "I serve our Master." She hissed through clenched teeth. -- "Hi guys!" Gabby waved landing at the CMC's club house. "Ready for the first Annual CMC gaming marathon? ... Where's Sweetie Belle's coltfriend?" "Fixing some big computer trouble in another universe," Scootaloo said matter of fact. "... Scootaloo... why are you a dragon?" "Has to do with Dash's custody battle against my neglective biological family." "Oh. Uh.... By the way, is this really you guys?" Gabby took out an old Foal Freepress ... with gossip articles by Gabby Gums. "That... was not one of our better times," Apple Bloom admitted. "Or mine..." Diamond Tiara sighed. "Were you really a bad guy? You don't seem the bad guy types." Discord meanwhile saw the meeting and clapped. Discord cackled, "And that makes number seven. Now we have the whole herd. Seven creatures with seven virtues." --- "Hi, you gonna see this movie too? Seems like we're gonna be the only people in the threater, I'm Gabby, you guys are?" "Uh, Ah'm Apple Bloom, this is Sweetie Belle, and this here is Scootaloo." Session 96.21 Ardashir "YEEEOWWW!" Grubber ran into Tempest's room as fast as his short little legs could carry him. The Yetis around him, former members of the Storm King's army, almost jumped put of his way as he raced past shrieking. He headed right for a dais on which Tempest sat facing three gray-furred Yetis, clan elders in ornately embroidered robes of honor. "Tempest! We gotta problem! A BIG problem!" "Grubber!" He froze as Tempest snorted at him. She stomped one hoof against the wooden floor, sending an echo through the hall. "Not now! I'm at a very delicate moment with the Clan Tsobyang leaders." She turned back to them and set her marble down on the board between them. As she did she whispered to Grubber, "The Tsobyang believe this is the same game played between Father Old Monkey and the ogress he mated with to produce their ancestors. By playing it I'm showing respect for their customs and..." She froze in disbelief as a familiar voice spoke behind her. "Bleah, bleah, bleah, respect their customs, like pretty prissy ponies care about junk like that." She turned where she sat, her blood running cold, to see someone she thought dead standing there. "You know, Tempest, when I accepted your loyalty I didn't put you through all this nonsense. It was enough that you could do your job..." "No," Tempest whispered as her eyes narrowed. Grubber tried to hide behind her. "You're dead. I saw you die!" "And that you were loyal," the Storm King waved his hand as he made chuckled in mockery. Al around stunned Yetis were falling to their knees, knocking head against the floor before they leaped to their feet and waved their arms over their heads in victory. The Storm King clasped his hands and shook them over his head like a boxer after winning his championship. The Tsobyang Yetis redoubled their cheers. Then he looked back at Tempest, all trace of amusement gone. "But you weren't loyal, and you didn't do your job, did you?" "You were a monster, a tyrant," Tempest pointed her horn at him. It sparked wildly. "I won't let you attack Equestria again!" Her ears pinned as he laughed uproariously. "Let me? You think you can stop me?" He rubbed his chin, looking thoughtful. "But still, I gotta prove to my people that I have what it takes. So tell ya what," he knuckled her by her horn; she just glared at him. "If you can beat me in a game, of my choosing, I'll turn around and leave." Tempest thought furiously. She felt Grubber move behind her. If she could stop him now, and find out how he returned? "Deal. What's the game?" As soon as she spoke something hard smashed into the back of her head. She turned. Her eyes widened in disbelief as she saw Grubber raising the club he'd been hiding. "You --" "Sorry, Fizzlepop." Grubber brought the club down one last time. It felt like Tempest's entire head came apart as she collapsed at the Storm King's feet. Smiling, he knelt beside the unconscious unicorn. "My dear Tempest, the game is 'Anything Goes', and I just won." He rose and jerked a thumb to some of the Yetis. "Put her in a cell. I'll take care of her later." He started to ascend the dais, the Tsobyang elders having wisely vacated it. When Grubber tugged at his leg he scowled. "Remember what ya promised boss," Grubber whimpered as the Storm King leaned over with a snarl on his face. "Ya won't kill Tempest since I knocked her out." "Don't worry, Grubber." The hedgehog started to smile. The Storm King gave Tempest a kick. "I said I wasn't going to kill her, and I won't. Not anytime soon, anyway." He gave her another, harder kick. His voice dropped to a hiss. "She doesn't deserve an easy or quick end after backstabbing me." He pointed at the shocked hedgehog. "Get him outta here." "What? No! Ya, ya promised..." Grubber's wail drifted back as a pair Yetis dragged both him and the senseless Tempest away. The Storm King ignored him, tapping one foot impatiently until the Yetis dragged out the carved wooden throne usually reserved for the Eldest Elder. "First I check in with the old goat," the Storm King mused as he sat back in the throne. The Yetis began bowing and scraping before him, all save a few who sneaked out unnoticed. "Then I find out how many airships and Gorgon Gas bombs I had stockpiled away -- I'll haveta keep one back for Grogar; no way am I going to be that senile wreck's flunky forever, bleuh," he stuck his tongue out, sickened. "But first of all, boys?" He leaped to his feet and yelled. "WE ARE BACK IN BUSINESS, BABY! And the whole world is gonna tremble at my bing-bang-BOOM!" The wild roars of a horde of vengeful Yetis echoed up through the snowy mountain night sky.