"When you said you wanted to talk later this evening, this isn't exactly what I had in mind."
"Huh... too many candles?"
Lightning snorted. While she could understand that Thunderlane would behave very differently now that they were dating, she wasn't expecting for his romantic side to blossom that quickly.
They both were back at his kitchen, the table excessively decorated with all kinds of ornaments that Lightning only saw when she was occasionally invited to a marriage. Several small candles spread all around the room that gave away the feeling of a ominous ritual taking place.
Dust wouldn't mind if he wanted to set a frisky mood or anything of the sort. If that made him happy and more comfortable around her then she had no reason to complain. Besides he clearly put effort into it despite the environment feeling anything but romantic.
But he better not dare mentioning this ocassion to anypony.
"Nah, just... I dunno. Perhaps they should be more centered instead of around us."
"Ahn." Thunderlane felt slightly frustrated and embarrassed for his mistake. He spent a long time trying to set a mood, but perhaps he should've asked for Cloud Chaser or Kicker to help him somewhat. The events of the afternoon still were plaguing his mind.
At least Rumble wouldn't be at the house this night. The colt decided to spend the weekend with his friends back at the Cutie Mark camp. Thunderlane was glad Rumble has friends at his age to spend time with, it felt rewarding to see his brother having a better social life after all their struggles.
"So... ya cook? I actually had forgotten ya said that. Huh, ya could make some nice extra money. The team is always going out for fast foods and whatnot. Some home cooking would be a nice change." The mare suggested while serving herself of a generous portion of carrot soup. "It's annoying to workout all that food crap outta my body later."
Thunderlane raised an eyebrow.
"You mean that their food is... well, a bathroom issue?"
"What?" Lightning stared at him before laughing. "No, ya dork! I meant calories and that stuff!"
"Oh." The stallion could feel his face heating up. If they could through this night without Thunderlane making himself look like a complete idiot then it could be considered a successful date.
Yet Lightning found herself highly amused by Thunderlane's clumsiness. She wasn't expecting anything out of the ordinary in regards to this date, it was fair and simple just as she prefered, if she ignored the dozens of candles around, and Thunderlane was just being as nervous as she expected him to be.
"So... all the fun aside... do ya want to talk about this afternoon?"
Thunderlane hesitated halfway through his motion of picking his wooden cup. The tip of his feathers resting on the edge of the table for few seconds before his wing returned to its natural position.
The mare expected him to be wary from now on, she knew this wasn't at all what he wanted to discuss.
"I... just wanted us to have a good time." He sounded so disappointed that Lightning almost didn't have enough courage on herself to push the issue forward.
"I know, I know, and we are, trust me. It's nice to able to be with somepony for once that won't look me sideways with envy, or hatred. Well, aside Rolling and Shorty of course, but they aren't the greatest company if I had to be honest."
"Then why? Why can't we just forge-
"Can you? Can you forget?" Dust abruptly asked, a mix of doubt and incredulity. "Are you telling me it doesn't hurt you? That it doesn't make you sick with worry?"
Thunderlane reluctantly remained silent, his reaction being enough of an answer for the mare.
"Look, we gonna be a thing now, we gotta look for the other more than usual friends. I know that much at least. I'm... not very into talking feelings and that sort of stuff, but... I care a lot about you. Well, shit. I'm not sure 'love' is the word I'm confident to use, but I will figure it out along the way. This isn't the first time I say it and it won't be the last."
The stallion nodded, seemingly lost in thoughts as he poked his spoon in a manner that screamed sadness all over it.
Lightning felt worried that she may be pushing too hard all of sudden, last thing she wanted was to make her partner miserable. She wasn't an expert on telling others how to deal with their life issues.
That and she did not want to get on Cloud Kicker's bad side.
"Did you talk with Spitfire?"
The unexpected question made Dust jolt in surprise. Her eyes widened in pure perplexity at this unforeseen intrigue coming from her crestfallen partner.
"Talk... what with Spitfire?" Lightning retorted, trying her best to not sound upset by his assumption that she would even want to talk with Spitfire.
Thunderlane was well aware that he was trotting on thin ice, he reconsidered his words more carefully before replying.
"I remember you mentioning Spitfire talking you out of your job a few times, at least trying to. Is that true?"
"Oh." Lightning felt silly for forgetting that obvious detail. "Yeah, she was giving me a lotta crap about danger and some other bullshit, like she actually gave a fuck about me breaking my neck! I bet she's looking forward to see me outta a wing soon."
Now Thunderlane did not doubt that Spitfire did try talking Lightning Dust out of her dangerous stunts, but to want Dust actually hurt? That was clearly Lightning's biased opinion.
Any other day of the week Thunderlane would've spoken in defense of his captain, but Spitfire left much to desire in the stallion's short career as a Wonderbolt so far, that and his special somepony mattered more to him than Spitfire ever would.
"Speaking of it, how ya feel about being a Wonderbolt? I remember I probably asked but we never talked much into it."
"Well, we didn't because I didn't want to upset you."
"Hey now, why would I be upset?" She asked, clearly humored by his silly worries.
Thunderlane couldn't help his jaw stiffening for few seconds before replying.
"Because, as much you don't want to admit, there wasn't a single day you didn't wonder the 'what ifs' of what happened back at the Academy. Wishing and regretting the choices you could have made and didn't. The chance you wasted at the possibility of accomplishing the thing every pegasus dreams about ever since they learned how to fly. How much you hate yourself for not realizing your mistakes and how you hate others for not calling you out on your mistakes, or how incredibly judgemental they were about the type of pony they thought you to be."
Lightning stared in silence, as if regarding the pony across her for the first time in ages. Her stunned expression the greatest giveaway of how he nailed that feeling of hers that not even her knew how to describe.
After what seemed an eternity the mare finally found her voice back, still too dazed to understand how did he understood so well how she was feeling.
"That... I don't even... how did you?..."
Thunderlane shrugged.
"A few reasons I think. A pony I took care for so long helps you learn to see how others feel without them expressing or voicing their problems. My... mother taught me a few things for, well, when I was a bit older. Also you do not notice but you're very expressive with the way you feel, even if it do not goes with what you're saying."
"I am?" The mare was clearly dumbstruck. Thunderlane nodded. "Crap. That explains why Rolling is always beating me up at poker nights."
"You play poker?" Thunderlane asked, genuinely surprised Dust made no mention of it before.
"Yeah, we kinda play around few times, when we don't really have much to do with the bits we have on excess."
"How much do you all earn per show? If you don't mind me asking of course." The stallion quickly added, worried she would take it the wrong way.
Lightning didn't seem to mind, but the way she took her time to answer made Thunderlane understand that this was something she might be uncomfortable to talk about.
"Well, it's not like it should be that much of a deal, but... " The mare bit the inside of her cheek, displaying a fair amount of anxiety. "How much do you earn as a Wonderbolt?"
Thunderlane was starting to regret asking. Now he was the one who felt cornered about being asked of his income.
"About two hundred bits a month." He replied hesitantly.
Lightning's reaction was of total surprise and slight disappointment.
"That's it?! Wow, that's not much as I expected."
"Well, we get extra for each show we get called upon." Thunder explained, although he knew the extra amount didn't really matter much.
"Oh, cool. How many shows ya been up so far?" She asked more excitedly this time around.
Thunderlane braced himself for the impact.
"Hum.... one."
"What?! ONE?! But you're almost a half a year in the Wonderbolts!!"
Her shock and indignation made the stallion's face flush from the embarrassment.
"I mean, I had my debut in Ponyville. If it wasn't for Soarin and Misty backing me up I probably would still be waiting. It was four months after I got fledged. I honestly thought about giving up few times."
"How can anypony give up on being a Wonderbolt?" Lightning asked, perplexed that the stallion even considered such affront.
Thunderlane wasn't sure how to explain what he felt during that time, he never talked with anypony about his issues at the HQ, not even Cloud Kicker. The more he thought about it, the less convinced he was about staying in the Wonderbolts.
"My father was a Wonderbolt." He said in despair, memories of the older stallion, sharing and teaching the young colt, easily came to surface. "I.... he taught me a lot about being one. The way he said made everything sound awesome. It was there and then that I decided that I wanted to become one too. Mother was worried about me chasing down that path, said that life could get really demanding when it comes to be a flying celebrity. Though I never cared about being popular. I just thought it would be a career I would be happy with."
Lightning didn't say anything, worried she might spoil this rare moment in which the stallion was sharing more of his family, something he always avoided.
Yet, she saw that she had different reasons for becoming a Wonderbolt. While she sought fame and recognition, Thunderlane prefered the enjoyment of just being part of it. He never intended to be a comet in the sky, for him being among all the other stars was just good enough.
She couldn't understand why he prefered minimum when he has potential to be so much more.
"Still, that totally blows! Two hundred bits, fuck."
"Well, how much you do then?" He asked politely, this discussion about his salary wasn't doing any good about his resolve on staying a Wonderbolt.
"Eh, a bad month around six to eight hundred bits." She nonchalantly replied.
Thunderlane felt something in his chest sinking really fast.
"And.... on a good month?" He asked somewhat fearfully.
"Best we got was around two thousand bits. For each one of course."
Thunderlane was struggling to absorb this information. Two thousand in a single month was enough to cover for almost all members of the Wonderbolts! Lightning's paycheck was enough to cover Spitfire, Fleetfoot and Soarin for the entire season!
Lightning wasn't sure what to make of Thunderlane's panicked face. She was already anticipating some awkwardness the moment he told his salary was almost ten times less of what she earned, and she felt bad that the gap between them was so gigantic when she knew very well that he was having a much harder time as a Wonderbolt.
" Lightning... " He asked after a moment of awkward silence. His eyes finding hers after a long time of internal struggle from his part. "... are the Wonderbolts done for?"
Dust scratched one of her ears, unsure if she understood what he asked.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean... seeing how successful your team is and how your style is so appealing to everypony. Will any filly dream about becoming a Wonderbolt?"
Lightning immediately understood at what he was trying to get at, and the reason of his worry was not out of merit. Yet, she couldn't see how to counter that troublesome thought.
"I... don't know. I wouldn't think that we would cause that huge of an impact." She admitted, frowning at the consequences that the meteoric success of her team could cause. "But I can't be blamed. This is part of the business, if the Wonderbolts want to compete they gotta step up."
Undeniably true. The Washouts really went a few steps up in terms of what a daredevil can present to impress crowds. Yet, those few steps were just way over the line for what the Wonderbolts deemed 'reasonable'.
Thunderlane couldn't see how Spitfire would ever consider training the Wonderbolts, or cadets for that matter, to do such dangerous stunts for the sake of being more impressive.
Unless...
An idea popped in his head, crazy and beyond logical comprehension as one could expect, but an idea nonetheless.
"What if I told you," He started, unsure if he could even believe his own words. " That you could be a Wonderbolt and perform the same stunts that your team does?"
Lightning, unsurprisingly, gave him an ironic glance in return.
"The hay ya talking about? Is this some kind of prank or something?"
"Not a prank." The stallion was glad be sounded more firmly this time around, despite the idea still feeling ludicrous. "I mean... let's think this through.... you want to be a Wonderbolt more than-
"I don't want to-
"Lightning! Please, stop lying to me and to yourself!" Thunderlane cut her off right away. For the first time feeling extremely upset with her stubbornness. "You want it just as much as I wanted before I got fledged! Being a Washouts won't change what you really feel about it! You dreamed about this since you were a filly! Just as I did since I was a colt! The only thing stopping you from trying again is Spitfire! The Wonderbolts are way more than just Spitfire!"
"So? She's the one who make the calls. What chance do I-
"No, she deals with the calls cause she's the one who's in physical condition of doing it. It doesn't mean she has the final say on everything."
For the first time in what felt like ages, Lightning felt a small spark inside her chest that she had forgotten all about. She dared not to hope, but all this sudden crazy talk from the pony she trusted the most was getting to her.
"How can you even be sure of that? Or know it for that matter?"
Thunderlane, after carefully studying Lightning's facial expression, realized that the line of denial was finally being crossed. Now it was a matter of not making promises that he would regret later.
"Do you know General McFly?" Lightning snorted.
"Who doesn't? One of the greatest of all time an-
"Do you know him personally?"
Lightning shut herself for a second, the serious look on the stallion's face warned her from having any doubts from what he was about to say.
"My father introduced him once. He was the one who pulled dad's ropes back then and taught him discipline, aside other things. Tough, straight to the point, no bullshit. Yet, I could call him many things, but never unfair. There was no Wonderbolt with better judgement than him. If I didn't know any better, I would say dad tried his best to be like McFly. Some of his colleagues always made fun of dad for being the Captain's favorite."
Thunderlane paused, the memories bringing a familiar sense of pride and joy that was left behind after the tragic events.
"What I'm trying to say is... you founded the Washouts, and seeing how the Wonderbolts are going down the cliff due your success, I think you should talk with McFly. If there's somepony that breathes the life of what the Wonderbolts of old truly are, it's him. He will listen to you. And there's the important part obviously." Thunderlane added with a chuckle.
"Which is?" Lightning asked, still too bewildered to express any opinions.
"He's Spitfire's superior officer. What he says goes, no matter she likes it or not."
It was almost as if somepony has just presented her with the most predictable gift she could expect from a Heart's Warming night, yet it totally surprised her nonetheless, especially because she never bothered to think about it before.
"I can't believe I never thought of that." Lightning said mostly to herself, yet confusion was evident as she still couldn't see what to do with this info. "So what then? What could I say to McFly that would make him interested?"
At this Thunderlane couldn't help but smile mischievously. Lightning raised an eyebrow at that reaction.
"Well, now I have some suggestions in mind, but I only will be sure if we talk with him personally."
"Pfff, talk with General McFly?! Good luck finding where he lives." She replied, followed by a derisive snort. Thunderlane shrugged.
"He lives in Cloudsdale."
".... kay. Good luck knowing if he will be at his house when we get there."
"It so happens that McFly's niece is a Wonderbolt and a friend of mine, so I can ask her anytime." The stallion couldn't help the smug grin on his face, much to Lightning's flaring annoyance.
"Urgh, good luck thinking he will want to see you then!"
"Well, it happens I'm the son of his all time favorite cadet?" The stallion couldn't help the irony.
"Fuck! Fine, ya win! We will go see damn McFly! This better be good, I really don't want to waste free time being stuck hearing stories with an old feather." The mare crossed her hooves, looking extremely frustrated she couldn't win her way out of it.
"Hey, don't say it like that. I wouldn't mind if McFly wanted to tell stories of my dad, it would be nice to know more about him."
Lightning felt her cheeks flush from embarrassment. Thunderlane managed to make her look like the most ignorant pony in a single sentence.
The stallion didn't seem to realize how abashed he made the mare feel with his words, his eyes staring at something in the distance, outside of the current plane of reality.
'I really gotta stop being so self centered. This means way too much for him, even if he's trying to help me out. At least I think he is.'
The mare desperately searched for something to say, anything that would break the awkward mood she got themselves in.
"Hey, do ya want to hang out tomorrow?"
Thunderlane's trance was suddenly broken, he blinked few times, glancing her way with a dubious look on his face.
"Hang...out...? Huh... I... sure? But what are we doing?
'Crap, I should have thought of that first!' "Huh, ya know any good place we can go for some fun? It doesn't matter where, I will take care of the finances."
Thunderlane clearly didn't agree with that proposal, if the frown on his face was anything to go by. Yet, he hummed while thinking on something that could peak Lighting's interested.
But if she was going to pay...
Thunderlane wouldn't mind having a bit of fun.
"Oh, sure. There's this place you will love it." He replied coolly.
"For real? What is it like?
"Nice, warm and relaxing." Thunderlane responded somewhat enigmatically. Lightning chuckled.
"Really? That I gotta see. Anyways... wanna have a bit of fun tonight?'
Thunderlane felt the smirk on his face melt instantaneously. The room suddenly felt ten times hotter than usual.
"Huh, what exactly you mean with that?" He asked, hating himself for the noticeable fear on his voice.
"Seriously? Come on dude. Ya a guy and I'm a gal, what else could we be doing?" She asked humorously, but the blank expression from the stallion evaporated Dust's smile. "Wait... are ya telling me ya never..."
"I... huh.... probably not... "
"Huh, no wonder they thought ya were gay."
"Gee, thanks a lot, that really makes me feel better." The stallion replied bitterly. The mare winced at her choice of words.
"Huh, I mean... good you're not a molester?"
Thunderlane stared her in bewilderment, bitterness replaced by shock. The mare sighed in defeat.
"Yeah, shutting up now."
None of the two said anything for few minutes. The only sound coming from the occasional hoof tapping over a flat surface or the sounds of spoons pinging on the plates.
"Have you... ever done it before?" Thunderlane suddenly asked, such question taking a lot more courage than he thought it would be necessary.
"I.... yeah. With a... mare once." Dust replied hesitantly.
'Crap. I own Kicker thirty bits.'
The stallion, despite knowing he would lose money in a short future, couldn't help the strange sense of relief he felt for Lightning never being with another stallion before.
"Right, so you okay doing this? Like... I'm not sure what to do." Thunderlane's timidly asked.
"Really? Thought ya would have a Playpone or something layin-
"I know what a mare looks like Dust! I meant about doing things in a way you will like!" He quickly replied, flustered at her boldness.
Lightning chuckled. Yet, she had several internal debates in regards to such intimacy.
"Listen, if ya don't feel ready we can try this some other time. What's the hurry for? I'm sure ya won't blow if ya can't get some steam off or something like that."
All Thunderlane could do was give her a deadpanned look in return.
"So let me know when ya feel ready. And in the mean time we can try to learn more stuff about ourselves. Say, how about an early morning flight tomorrow? I miss doing some long runs, being a Washouts doesn't allow me to do soft flying anyways." She suggested, seemingly more empathetic with the stallion's insecurities.
Thunderlane nodded. Lightning's consideration for his lack of experience was somewhat surprising. He knew she wasn't as aggressive like some other mares or so self centered as he expected. It was hard for her to be disappointed or frustrated by things not working out.
"So, I guess I will see you tomorrow, morning then?" Thunderlane asked, getting on his hooves with the intent of following the mare outside.
Lightning rolled her eyes as soon she realized he was trying to be courteous in his goodbye. She jumped from her chair with a quick flap of wings before touching the floor smoothly.
"Sure, I will be here. Really early, think ya can take it?"
"Heh, if I didn't, I don't think they would take me as a Wonderbolt." Thunderlane joked.
Lightning shrugged before turning around and making her way to the entrance. Thunderlane was a bit taken aback by her sudden movement and quickly followed after.
The door wasn't far off, but the stallion couldn't help the feeling that the silence that followed both of them dragged time across for an eternity. He felt something was amiss and couldn't figure out what it was.
He wordlessly opened the door and moved so Lightning could leave, but he froze as soon his head turned around and she slammed her lips onto his.
The sudden kiss shocked him into an alternate plane of existence, for he had never experienced such before, the warmth and softness alienating his senses. His eyes, previously open wide due the contact, now slowly close as he grew herself comfortable with the event.
The moment felt like forever, yet his lungs soon started to scream in protest. With eyes half lid, he lightly tapped her chest as a way to request the separation. She attended his request, slowly pulling her head back, her eyes slowly opened revealing two glowing amber orbs, reflecting the brightness of the moon leaking through the open door.
Despite all the magic the stallion saw along the years, nothing ever came to compare to this moment, one that drove him into a sense of awe that nothing had ever done before.
"I kinda love you too."