//------------------------------// // International Incendiary // Story: Unconventional Conclusions // by FanOfMostEverything //------------------------------// Nopony could be Twilight Sparkle's friend for long and not get used to her squees of academic joy whenever some interesting phenomenon happened. That wasn't what concerned Applejack. What did was the bustling metropolis on the very edge of the Cutie Map, where her mark now spun. "Hang on," she said, "I thought the kirin lived in the Peaks o' Peril. What's this 'Tokirin' business?" Twilight paused in her pronking long enough to scowl at her. "Creatures can have more than one settlement, Applejack." A flick of the horn, and several points on the map's oceans lit up. "The hippogriffs had numerous underwater outposts. Some of them even survived the Storm King's bombardments." "Yeah, about that," said Rainbow Dash, who'd also been called. "Were they hippogriffs or seaponies first? I'm not clear on that and Silverstream doesn't exactly help clear things up when you ask." "In hindsight, having Pinkie Pie teach philosophy and dialectics wasn't the wisest decision I ever made." Twilight shook her head. "But we're getting off-topic. The point is that the Map is sending you two on a mission! I wasn't even sure if it still could after the Tree of Harmony was destroyed, but maybe this is how we can help it recover!" Applejack scratched under her hat. "If you say so, Twi, but it seems pretty darn recovered t' me." "No kidding," said Dash. "When do you think Princess Luna's gonna stop sulking over the students taking over her old castle?" "Well..." Both turned back to a grimacing Twilight. "Truth be told, Princess Celestia isn't taking it much better. She just sulks more... subtly." ——— Twilight shook her head as she watched the camera obscura's projection. "Spike! Let Celestia know she should stop drafting that eviction notice on the surface of the sun! She ceded the castle to me before Tirek struck and I still haven't given it back!" ——— "But that's neither here nor there. You don't need to worry about that, just getting to the Akiumara merchant district." Applejack saluted. "Yes, ma'am." "I bet I can find the friendship problem first!" cried Dash. Twilight sighed. "Could you at least wait until after you leave the map room before giving me reasons to worry about this mission?" The parliament buildings were a feast for the eyes, gorgeous architecture containing a blend of modern and ancient building methods that made Twilight wish she were here under happier circumstances. She bowed the precise degree she was meant to according to an internal protractor spell and said, "Thank you for having me, Minister Heat Haze. May I ask what the problem is? The earlier missives were... cryptic." The kirin buck gave her a look flat enough to serve as a foundation before taking a scroll in his magic. "Your colleagues addressed a cruel game of life and death going on under our very muzzles, in the shadows of one of the brightest jewels of Neighpon." "Oh. I'd been wondering how the friendship mission had gone." Biting her hooves to the point Twilight had needed to magically regrow them certainly qualified as "wondering." "I had no idea it... would..." Minister Haze's look had found a way to grow even less amused, making the embers playing along his eyebrows especially concerning. "There's more, isn't there?" He made a show of unrolling the scroll, the text facing him. Twilight couldn't read whatever was written there, but she could see the scorch marks easily enough. "From what we could gather from the prisoners and eyewitnesses, while they went into Akiumara by surface rail, they chose to leave by subway. At rush hour." "Oh." Twilight gulped, already putting together the pieces. "Voluntarily?" "Voluntarily or not, Ms. Dash's claustrophobic panic attack set off several nearby passengers, who set off several others, and so forth. What pulled into the next station could very accurately be described as a chariot of fire. We have systems in place to prevent one or two nirik, of course, but not several dozen igniting in a matter of seconds." "I see." Twilight winced. "How many casualties?" "Virtually none. Kirin or nirik, fire cannot harm us, though there were a few broken bones in the ensuing riot. The infrastructural damage was far worse." She swallowed, dreading the next question. "And my friends?" "Alive and recuperating. We are willing to negotiate for their release." Twilight sighed, half from relief, half from dread. "This is going to involve some very unfavorable trade deals, isn't it?" Minister Haze quirked an eyebrow. A corner of his mouth turned up just a touch. "Not for Neighpon."