//------------------------------//
// Button Mash Attempts to Party 
// Story: Button Mash Attempts to Party 
// by semillon 
//------------------------------//

It was like Button was underwater. That should have been an obvious thing to occur to him, and not anything special, because he was underwater. But it was like doing it in a dream, as opposed to actually submerging himself in water while he was awake.

He was awake, though. He was just in one of the most stupidly excessive, garish, beautiful rooms that he had ever been in. And that was saying something when it came to Diamond Tiara’s estate.

Button remembered when the estate was simply a house, and the house’s four large stories had impressed him. 

As they had grown older, it had grown into something far more. It was like the house was just a budding fungus, and over the years it bloomed into an entire colony of weird and wonderful things. Like the pool that he was currently in.

If he remembered correctly, Diamond Tiara had begun her whole obsession with all things Hippogriff a few months ago. It had started with Silverstream visiting town and checking up on the CMC while everypony in the group was out at night, drinking as they strolled down the town streets. Button wasn’t there himself—he only had Rumble’s word to go on—but Diamond was entranced by a couple of bangles that the hippogriff had on her wrist and, being trained in the art of Friendship by the best in Equestria, Silverstream had given Diamond all of her jewelry with a smile and a “We have plenty of this stuff on Mount Aris!”

A week later and Diamond had brought Silver Spoon along with her to an initial trip to the hippogriff capital of the world. A month, and she was as familiar with the entire place as she was her bedroom. Two months, and there were enough beautiful fixtures and jewelry from Mount Aris to start a whole shop dedicated to the stuff. That never happened, however, because Diamond could hoard like a dragon when she wanted to.

Four months after Silverstream’s visit, and two months before Button Mash stumbled into the estate, his own thoughts like a beehive in his mind, the pool was installed. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to call it one of the best swimming pools in all of Equestria.

When you entered the room, the entire floor spread out in front of you like a waterfall of white marble that dropped down into the most vibrant, glowing pool of sapphire sea water that you had ever seen. It looked simple. Minimalistic, almost. There were multiple ladders that one could use to climb down into the pool, and some large blocks of marble off to the side that one could use for benches. It was certainly beautiful, but that’s all it was until you stepped in it.

When you stepped into the water, the pool would glow, and you would turn into a seapony. This was because at the very centre of the bottom of the pool was a tiny, intricate engraving that held a pearl. The pearl was extremely hard to acquire, but through the buckets of money that her family held, and an entire week of doing nice things for Twilight Sparkle, nepotism and wealth had won in the end. Diamond Tiara had managed to snag herself a pearl enchanted with an imitation of the same transformative hippogriff magic that Queen Novo’s pearl had possessed. It wasn’t quite the same as Queen Novo’s pearl, but it was close enough, and it was more than enough to turn a simple swimming pool into an amazing one.

Once you were a seapony, you’d be able to swim to the floor of the pool, and you’d behold a dining table made of polished volcanic rock inlaid with gold carvings in Old Equestrian. It looked like both an ancient seat of the gods, and a Las Pegasus hotel restaurant’s VIP lounge. 

Now, the table seated sixteen, but in case that wasn’t enough, there was a large, magically weightless rock in the corner of the pool with a flat surface on it for sleeping, relaxing, or to use as one huge extra chair that could handle ten more ponies. 

The group that Button was currently with numbered only twelve, so they didn’t need the giant rock couch, but he side-eyed it anyway and wished that he was there instead of where he was now.

“Never have I ever…” Rumble started. “Sold clover to foals.”

Nopony responded. 

“Let me amend that: Never have I ever not sold clover to young stallions and mares.”

“We’re young stallions and mares,” said Pipsqueak.

“Oh, you all know what I mean,” said Rumble. “Dinky’s out.”

Two seats away from Button, Dinky smiled. “Thanks, Rumble.”

“You can’t just target certain ponies because you want them out!” Apple Bloom protested, but Dinky was already halfway to the surface. Unicorns made for very good seaponies.

Magic swirled around her as she climbed out, transforming once again into a normal pony before she disappeared from view. 

Rumble shrugged, which looked weird with fins. “She’s gonna be zonked off her mind off that dank trifolium. I’m doing you all a favor and preventing her from inventing a new strain of performance enhancing salt later.”

“What if I wanted that?” Spike joked from beside him.

“Pufferfish don’t get to talk,” Rumble and Scootaloo said at the same time. Spike rolled his eyes in response, inflating slightly. He nipped Rumble’s fin in retaliation.

In the middle of Rumble’s whine in response, translucent pink liquid descended from the surface of the water, floating freeform for a moment before it twisted up and turned into a ball. It shot towards the table, getting to the middle of everypony present in the blink of an eye before it exploded.

Pink liquid shot towards Button’s gills. He didn’t bother trying to get away from it. There was a magical enchantment on them that made it attuned to him, and there was no use running away because it would find him. Wherever he went. Unless it was outside of the pool, but he couldn’t swim that fast even in his new form.

His world turned to breathing pink bubblegum and distilled fire. He didn’t cough, but anypony at the table who wasn’t normally an earth pony did.

Scootaloo shook her head, gagging. “Gin?”

“Pink gin,” Diamond swooned. “My favorite.”

See, Diamond’s parents used the pool for after-dinner conversations with dinner guests.

Diamond primarily used it for daily exercise, relaxing, and magically enhanced drinking games.

“Who’s got next turn?” asked Featherweight. 

“I do!” said Sweetie. “Never have I ever kissed Silver Spoon!”

Raucous laughter came from all around. Even Button found it in him to chuckle as Diamond Tiara and Scootaloo glared at the unicorn before they swam up, staying close to each other and whispering lowly. Revenge, Button guessed. Depending on who you were, “winning” a round could either be a reward or punishment.

The Reverse Never Have I Ever. Designed to punish those who wanted to drink and punish those who didn’t. Punishment, all around. 

Soon, honey gold liquid came soaring through the water before it dispersed into everypony’s gills. It was like inhaling sweetened gasoline.

“I hate whisky,” Skeedaddle groaned.

Pipsqueak laughed in response. “Looks like it’s already working its magic on you!”

“Bughhh, b-buck you.”

Rumble sniggered. “Lightweight.”

“Look who’s talking,” Featherweight teased.

Apple Bloom chuckled before she slammed her fins on the table’s surface, stopping any conversation still happening.

“Never have I ever,” she began slowly, building up drama by rolling the last R on ‘ever’. “Beaten Big Mac at a drinking contest.”

“Thank you,” Sweetie said, nuzzling her cheek before swimming up.

The rest of the table looked at Pipsqueak. Button turned a second late, feeling embarrassed. He had no idea that that happened. Or that Dinky sold clover, for that matter. Or—

“But I wanted to stay,” Pipsqueak whined.

Apple Bloom raised a brow and gestured to the surface with a fin. The pinto seapony glared at her before swimming up.

Everypony rearranged themselves so that they were closer knit. To Button’s right were Featherweight and Skeedaddle. To his left was Silver Spoon. Across from him were Rumble, Spike, and Apple Bloom.

“You feeling okay, Button?” Rumble asked. 

Button nodded, waving him off.

“He’s just staying quiet until he wins,” Silver Spoon suggested. “He’s being smart.”

“We all know he’s gonna win anyway,” said Featherweight. “He hasn’t—ow!” 

Featherweight rubbed his neck as Skeedaddle brought his fin back to his body. “Game’s not over yet. Don’t go being all pissimistic on me.”

“Pessimistic?” Spike corrected. 

“Oh, who turned you into Sweetie Belle, Spike?” asked Apple Bloom. “I thought you were still a stupid looking pufferfish.”

Spike glared at her. “Fluttershy’d have a fit if she heard you call pufferfish stupid.”

Apple Bloom looked like she was going to dare him to tell her, but then she deflated. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I’m not a pufferfish.”

“Nope!” chirped Rumble. “You’re a tall, hunky dragon with nice clothes.” 

He punctuated his statement with a wet, sloppy kiss on Spike’s head. Something that shouldn’t have been possible, as they were still underwater.

“Gross,” Featherweight stuck his tongue out. “Are we gonna move on to the next round, or…”

“We’re waiting on you,” Silver Spoon deadpanned.

“Right,” he said. “Well, my turn: never have I ever...defeated a monster from the Everfree Forest.”

Rumble, Apple Bloom, and Spike’s eyes widened.

“I really want to win,” Featherweight explained, eyeing Button and Silver Spoon. The three players across from them swam up. 

It was hard to tell that the magically balled up alcohol was even coming to them before there was a sudden rush in the water. Button figured that the others had decided to add a little extra and then some, because the only thing that he could taste, smell and breathe for an entire ten seconds was chilled, thick vodka. And it wasn’t good on any fronts.

Featherweight and Silver Spoon didn’t fare well either. Silver Spoon doubled over, quivering as the booze entered her system. Featherweight gave a garbled cross between a yell and a gag, screaming at the wall.

When all had calmed down and Button was sure that the alcohol was definitely in his bloodstream and going very fast, or whatever it did to make someone drunk, Featherweight turned to glare at him.

“Your turn, Button,” he said.

“Um, never have I ever—ever, uh...” Button put a fin to his chin. “Never have I ever had sex in a locker room?”

Featherweight sighed. “Good game.”

The seat where the former pegasus was sitting shook slightly as he shot up to the surface.

Button blew a few bubbles out of his mouth and turned to Silver Spoon, only to find her gone. He looked up just in time to see her leaving the water.

“Buck,” he whispered. He wasn’t supposed to win. He was only supposed to get second place! He was going to eliminate Featherweight and then beg Silver Spoon to eliminate him. Why did he pick such a vague question?
“Button,” the walls glowed and rang with Diamond Tiara’s voice. To his credit, Button only flinched, and didn’t run away or anything silly like that. “We’re going to turn the entire pool into booze now.”

“What?” Button asked. “What?”

“Don’t worry, Bee,” Rumble’s voice came out of the walls next. “Remember that weird round gem we all swallowed earlier?”

“Yeah…”

“It stops your blood alcohol level from getting too high. If you ingest anything more than that it’ll just absorb the alcohol in place of your liver.”

“Wait, really?”

“Have you forgotten that I’m stupid rich?” Diamond boomed from all around. “And also that I wouldn’t let anything happen to you?”

“Maybe that second part,” Button muttered, feeling hot all of a sudden.

“Oh, ha ha. When the water turns all dirt colored, swim to the surface.”

“When the—”

The water came to life, turning in an instant to a thick, liquid golden brown akin to maple syrup. Button swam as fast as he could through it. His entire being became a smooth, sandy burn that reminded him of a fireplace. Like, being a fireplace. He imagined that if he were a changeling who had changed into an old, smoky fireplace, that it would feel exactly like this. He was probably right, too. 

The light grew as he got closer to the surface, and with a cry that reminded him of the time he charged Silent Hooves in Canterlot Crusher 2 with reckless abandon, screaming as he smashed his hooves on the game cabinet’s buttons on the day that he earned his cutie mark, he breached the water that had turned into bourbon.

Air had never felt so sweet. So soft. He breathed it with the kind of vigor, a hurried, relieved panic like it was a lover he hadn’t smelled the scent of in a million years. 

“Button?” Rumble asked. “You okay?”

He could feel the tension in everypony else. He could see them holding their breath, though he only had eyes for the white marble right then.

Button Mash yelled, catching their attention and stopping Rumble’s wing in its path to hold him close.

Button looked up, at the crowd gathered around him. Worried eyes wondering about him. Looking at him like he was an animal at Fluttershy’s sanctuary.

“That really sucked,” he said. “When’s the next round?”

Cheers rang out. They stayed in Button’s ears for a long while.





Two rounds of winning later and Button Mash was surprised he wasn’t sick. Then he remembered that he was an earth pony, and that he was basically bred to not get sick unless very, very physically overworked. 

Chatter clattered around the corners of the room, surrounding him in what was beginning to sound like a flock of sparrows fighting amongst themselves. Hooves pat his back in congratulations. He had won! He had nearly drowned in the bourbon the third round, but hey, he was going to be fine. Who didn’t want to be completely intoxicated at a party like this?

Who?

The pegasi were all laughing about something. The unicorns were getting surly. The earth ponies were laughing a little softer. No one noticed him leave the couch that he had settled on when they migrated to the living room to dry off.

Button shambled to the other end of the house, his legs stiffer and more fragile than frozen stilts. Eventually he found what he was looking for and entered. 

At least Diamond Tiara’s bathrooms were relatively simple. 

Button Mash was halfway through relieving himself when he heard a knock at the door.

“Ooccupied,” he slurred, putting most of his focus on keeping his legs balanced and still. He doubted that Diamond would appreciate any splatter from a drunk friend she barely saw anyway. 

“I know,” came Rumble’s voice through the door. “I’m coming in.”

“Wait—”

Rumble stumbled in, eyes of glass and face flushed a light red. 

Button blinked. It was nothing that Rumble hadn’t seen before, but he didn’t often invade privacy like this.

“What’s up?” he asked.

“Dunno, just like, chillin’. I’m kinda feeling low energy right now.”

“You?” Button laughed. “You’re kidding.”

“What’s so unbelievable about that?”

Button gave him a look. Rumble crumpled under it and turned his head away, staring at himself in the mirror.

“I was wondering,” Rumble began, “if you maybe wanted to get out of here?”

Button’s eyes widened. Rumble’s did too.

“No, no! Not like that.”

“Good,” Button interrupted. “Spike would burn me alive and then you and then Thunderlane for good measure.”

“Ha. Yeah...” Rumble smiled. “I meant that we could grab Spike and leave for an hour or two. I don’t think anypony would mind. Maybe we could grab a few burgers and go to yours for a few hours. Maybe—”

“This is your party,” Button said. 

“So?”

“You want to be here,” he explained, like he was talking to a foal. “Why did you come in, Rumble?”

Rumble made a few attempts to respond, but couldn’t find the words. Button waited patiently, staring him down as the trickle of his stream began to die out. Eventually, Rumble sighed and looked at him with soft, silky eyes. “I just—are you okay, Bee?”

Button’s bladder had expelled all that it could. He lowered himself to his four hooves and walked to the sink. The water rushing down his hooves felt like it was stroking him.

“Yeah,” Button said. “I’m fine. Is that all?”

Rumble exhaled out of his nose, then sat on the floor and whimpered. “I don’t want you to push yourself. I want you to have a good time, sure, but if that means leaving early because you’re not feeling well then that’s alright.”

“Celestia, are you done? You sound like my mom after two margaritas.”

The pegasus looked shocked. Then he got indignant, wings flaring out as Button dried his hooves on a washcloth.

“Oh, forgive me for being worried about you,” Rumble spat. “It’s not like last time you came out you ran out of the club cr—”

“Stop.” Button turned around and smashed a hoof on Rumble’s barrel. Hard. Rumble took a few hurt steps back as Button advanced, drunken anger flaring up out of nowhere. “Don’t mention that. You said you wouldn’t talk about it, so stop. Stop treating me like I’m made of glass and just leave me alone for once.”

Rumble stared at him, eyes growing wetter before he looked away and made for the door. “Sorry.”

A bear trap closed around Button’s heart. He stepped in front of Rumble and pulled him into a hug.

Rumble gasped against him—Button wasn’t the hugging type—before he wrapped his hooves around Button and buried his face into his neck. 

Button ignored the intense pleading that his body made to push Rumble away, and gave his best friend a good squeeze. “I didn’t mean to get mean.”

“I know,” Rumble said. “I shouldn’t have pushed you.”

“I’m okay,” Button said. “Promise.”

“Okay.” Rumble nodded, then pulled away a bit to nuzzle him, then stepped back to smile. “Let’s have fun.”

“Let’s.” Button opened the door and let Rumble step through first. 

Before he left the bathroom himself, Button cast a glance at the mirror. 

He looked like old soil mixed with coffee grounds and a pair of bloodshot, drunken eyes. He looked tired and nervous and sleepy. And he was, but that was fine. He turned away from the mirror and followed Rumble out of the bathroom, his heart racing. 
It would be fine. It would all be fine in the end.





Diamond Tiara’s plushie room was Button’s favorite place in the entire estate. The pool was awe-inspiring, and being a seapony was awesome, sure, but nothing could beat a room whose floor was a giant, soft pillow, with dozens of soft plushies on top of it. A whole menagerie of cute creatures with beaded eyes lay spread throughout the floor like...like a weird plush orgy had recently happened and they were all taking a breather.

The only bad thing about the room was that it was surrounded by glass. Ponies could look at him as much as he looked at them. He didn’t like that. It was fortunate that the party was in full swing, and no one was looking his way. 

He had decided to burrow underneath a giant octopus plush just in case, though. 

Button watched as the living room exploded over and over, bursting out into dance and song and thirsty drinking. Off to the side of the living room was a table for beer pong, and that was where the majority of the stallions stayed crowded, watching the players as they threw weightless, hollowed out spheres into cups. Well, they only landed into the cups about a third of the time. Most of it was a build of anticipation, and a sudden let down as the shots missed their marks.

Button scanned for Rumble in the crowd. He found him on a couch, cuddling with Spike and talking to Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle.

Everypony had grown up too soon. 

He bit the inside of his cheek. This wasn’t a new thought.

He still remembered when Spike was this slightly chubby, stout baby dragon that had the hots for Rarity. He still remembered when the CMC were tearing up half of Ponyville on a daily basis, desperately searching for their cutie marks. 

What he remembered most was him and Rumble. After school playdates turning to sleepovers and those turning into the kind of friendship that just let them visit each other’s houses whenever they wanted. Rumble was like a faithful dog. Forever by his side, through thick and thin, summer rain and frozen winters. 

Until it stopped, and he couldn’t remember when it did, but he suspected it was sometime after he had gone to the doctor.

Button remembered the cold can of Kirin Beer in front of him, glass cold with condensation and liquid a bright, sunny topaz. He took it into his hoof and drank until it was finished—earth pony genetics made it so he could scale it in but a few seconds.

With a frustrated slam, he put the empty can down. 

“Hey,” a sandpaper voice whispered into his ear as he was checking the glass for cracks.

Button pushed off with all four of his legs, nearly crashing into the wall as he flew sideways out of his giant octopus. He landed with his upper body twisted and held up by his front hooves, and his lower body limp, but struggling to gain its footing.

Scootaloo snickered and brushed some stray mane out of her eyes. Upon seeing it was her, Button flopped to his side, landing on the floor to glare at her. 

“Oh, come on,” said Scootaloo. “It was funny.”

The orange pegasus crawled closer, stopping when they were close enough to whisper.

“I didn’t say anything,” Button said.

“That scowl you’re scowling says plenty already,” Scootloo teased, smiling. “I’m sorry, Button.”

“It’s okay.”

“What are you doing here alone?”

“Is it weird for me to be alone?”

Scootaloo’s eyes shone with mirth. She snorted, halfway to a laugh. “I was just wondering.”

“I’m watching the party.”

“Don’t feel like joining it?”

“Not yet.”

“Will you ever?” Scootaloo asked. “No, sorry, that sounded sarcastic. I’m actually wondering, though.”

“Dunno,” said Button, looking to the living room again. 

“You always seem so happy to chill by yourself,” Scootaloo said quietly. “But you looked pretty sad just now.”

Button thought for a moment. She could have been baiting him. She could have been fishing for something that she could tell everypony there. ‘Button’s sensitive! Treat him like you’d treat a foal!’ Or something like ‘Can you guys chill out? Button’s scared.’

Or, even worse, she could whisper those things to everypony without him knowing it, and suddenly he’d be treated differently. And he wouldn’t find out until days later that Rumble’s going away party was a total bummer because of him. And then he’d have to find a nice quiet cliff out in the Everfree and throw himself off of it.

But she probably just wanted to help. That was what Scootaloo did, after all. She helped ponies. And she was his friend. He knew that it would probably make sense if she simply just cared about him, and wanted to make sure he was okay. But he didn’t know for sure.

His heart leapt as he cleared his throat. “I just don’t know if I can do it.”

“Do what?” asked Scootaloo. Her tone being clean of sarcasm and judgement nearly made Button sigh in relief.

“Just—that.” He gestured to the dancing in the living room, then to the beer pong, and onwards to the odd corners of the party where friendly conversations were being had.

“Who says you have to?” Scootaloo snorted.

Button stared at his hooves. “Rumble’s always been inviting me out, and I say yes every, like, what, one time out of thirteen? But he asks me with the same, hopeful look on his face, because he wants me to be happy. And I want to say yes, and I know he knows that sometimes I want to say yes but I say no anyway, and that kills him. I just—he’s leaving to take his brother’s spot on the Wonderbolts in what, six days? He’ll never see me again.”

“That’s not true,” Scootaloo said, an argument beginning to flow through her voice. “He—”

“I was just thinking that like, we just stopped hanging out every day sometime before school ended, and that it was definitely because of me, and he’s still my best friend,” said Button. “He didn’t care that I couldn’t see him anymore. That’s so—that’s so nice.”

“Yeah,” she said. “It is.”

She thought for a moment, and said, “Rumble knows not to push you. You’re off the meds now, right? They weren’t working?”

Button blushed. His head felt hot. “Yeah.”

“He just wants you to be happy.”

“And I wanted to make him proud tonight,” Button whispered, looking at her eyes. “Never have I ever was a good start, but now I don’t know if I can.”

“Well, I believe in you,” Scootaloo whispered back, booping him and drawing her hoof back before he could swat it away in mostly fake annoyance. 

“I don’t really know where to start.”

“Well, it’s lucky you have me here, isn’t it?”

Button laughed. It felt really good to laugh after the things he just said. “What did you have in mind?”

Scootaloo gestured to the dancing, which had slowed down considerably but was still ten times more energetic than Button felt. 

He blanched, though it was probably hidden underneath his coat. “You’re kidding. No.”

“I’m an awesome dancer,” said Scootaloo.

“Yeah well I’m not,” Button wheezed. 

“You will be, when I’m through with you,” Scootaloo purred. With a wink, she stood up. “Come on!”

Button shook his head. 

“Nopony’s gonna look at you or anything, I promise. I won’t push you further if you tell me no one more time, but if you say yes I can guarantee that you’re in good hooves.” Scootaloo stuck a hoof out towards him, a cocky smirk on her face. “I’m not gonna let anything bad or embarrassing happen to you. And even if you mess up, everypony’s gonna be too busy looking at me to notice anyway.”

Button breathed in sharply. This was it. He could do it, if he wanted. Or he could return to his comfy cavern of plushies. 

What was the worst that could happen? 

Well, a lot of things. 

But Button was just drunk enough to look Scootaloo in her eyes. Her eyes that were a little bit like fresh grapes out of the icebox at a picnic in the summertime.

She dragged him along, giggling as he stumbled up and leaned on her as they went to the living room. He giggled too, and was surprised to find that it was completely genuine.

That was until he had actually stepped onto the dance floor. 

His feet were welded to the ground by the hot blowtorch that was—well, fear wasn’t a strong enough word for it. It wasn’t the right one, either. 

Scootaloo rocked back and forth in front of him. Her face was a precise half-and-half measure of patience and excitement as her head bobbed in time to the lyricless, thumping music that Tootsie Flute was blasting at the end of the room. 

Around them was a throng of ponies going absolutely bonkers—flailing and swinging their heads and their flanks to the rhythm of the music. Somehow, Button hadn’t been hit by any stray limbs even once. He was certainly trying not to get hit though. He shuffled from side to side as the crowd closed in on one side, then the other, like he were trapped between two beaches in high tide. 

Eventually he caught a look from Scootaloo and shook his head. No, this isn’t what my dancing looks like. I’m not even sure what it looks like, but it’s not this.

Scootaloo looked relieved. “Alright, well, it’s do or die time, Button.” 

She offered her hooves. It took him considerably less time to take them than it did the last time.

“Just follow me, okay?” asked Scootaloo. “That’s all you have to do.”

“And how do I do that?” Button asked, his voice sounding more frantic than he realized. 

“Just tap into the same magic you feel when you’re in a musical number.”

Button tried. He shut his eyes and focused on his chest. He tried to feel for the butterflies that fluttered in him when song magic was coursing through his veins. 

Surprisingly, they answered.

His body moved on its own. It still felt awkward and disjointed, but not as much as it once did. He let Scootaloo take the lead, and when she moved, he did as well. She held him securely, legs around his waist as they twirled and swayed, but she didn’t hold him tight. They way that Scootaloo guided him through the dance was the way he wished everypony who ever touched him had done so.

Button blushed  at the thought.

Scootaloo didn’t notice, however. She was busy dancing with him. And he was dancing, now. 

The crowd disappeared on both sides. The dance floor became only he and her. Then it became grass.

Cold air nipped at Button as the music, still loud and still playing somehow, drifted across the grassy cliff that they were on. It swirled between them, bobbing in and out like a tailor’s needle and thread. Scootaloo pulled away, taking her hooves off of him, but he kept on going anyway.  The music reached a high point, and as her energy increased, so did his. 

Each of Scootaloo’s movements earned a response from him. He danced as she did. They were nearly mirrored. 

She looked at him, still dancing, and laughed. He laughed along with her and came close, offering himself.

Delighted, Scootaloo put her legs around him again and twirled him, dipped him and did a whole number of things Button found hard to describe. He only wished that he could see this from the outside. 

Outside…

“Wait,” he said, loudly. “Where are we?”

“DT’s living room has an illusion enchantment: when you’re dancing in it, you’re taken to a grassy cliff at night on Mount Aris. It looks cool, right?”
“It does,” Button said, leaning on her shoulder as he stared at the moon. “Can anypony see us?”

“They can if they want to, but the illusion’s real top notch so unless they really really wanna see us I’m sure that—” 

Scootaloo stopped dancing. 

Button spun out of her legs and stared at her. Around him, the grass began to fade. The air congealed and turned stick and warm. 

“Scootaloo?” he asked. Then the illusion dissipated.

The entire living room was staring at them, transfixed.

“Crap,” Scootaloo murmured, mostly to herself. “I shouldn’t have stopped.”

“Darn right you shouldn’t have!” a colt in the crowd said.

Cheers erupted from the crowd. Applause too.

Every inch of Button’s skin crawled. It felt like his coat was alive.

“Who knew Button could dance like that?”

“They’re so cute together!”

“Who’s Button?”

Button looked to the couch—Rumble was gone. Then he looked to Scootaloo. The pegasus bore a wide-eyed, clueless expression that made him sicker. 

He lifted his leg and took stiff, shaky steps towards the door, sweating impossibly as the crowd’s swarm of eyes tracked him like predators on a meal. 

“Where’s he going?”

“Guess he’s done.”

“Lame!”

The music began anew as Button left the room. He wanted to glance back at Scootaloo, but he didn’t. He couldn’t.





Button crushed the navy blue clay under his hoof, feeling it warp underneath him until it finally turned flat against the ground. He lifted his hoof and admired the print that he left behind. There was something therapeutic about pointlessly playing with clay. 

There was something ethereal about smoking clover while doing it as well. 

Spike held a pipe to his lips and he inhaled gently, drawing the smoke out of the burning leaves, watching his breath reduce their edges to cinders in the bowl. He pulled his head away and let Spike take the pipe back before he closed his eyes and exhaled. 

A large, thick cloud exited his mouth. He didn’t see it. He simply felt it. As he felt like he could feel all things, concurrently, right about now. He felt groovy.

Button giggled to himself as he opened his eyes and took a sniff at the clover smoke he just breathed out. The pipe was currently enchanted to make clover smell like snickerdoodles and wow, it really did. It really, really did smell like snickerdoodles. The best he had ever smelled. Probably the best he would ever taste, if he could taste them. But he couldn’t, because they weren’t real.

Like his fears. Those weren’t real. They were just, like, projections or whatever. They were fake. His brain was making horseapples up to protect itself from harm because he was such a baby about everything. He needed to toughen up. 

Button sniffled.

“You okay?” Spike asked.

Button’s eyes widened. “Spike?”

“Oh, wow,” Spike said. “Yeah, crossfading probably wasn’t the best idea for you.”

“Don’t be daft, Spike,” Diamond Tiara drawled, enunciating the word ‘daft’ in a dramatically exaggerated imitation of Pipsqueak’s accent. “Button needed to relax. You saw what he was like when he came in here.”

“I don’t think he knows where ‘here’ is right now, filly,” Tree Hugger said.

“Who are you?” Button Mash asked her. “Why do I know your name?”

“Tree Hugger…” said Tree Hugger. “We met ten minutes ago. Your aura was, waaaaay out of sorts.”

“Oh,” Button said. “Wait, where am I?”

“Pottery room,” said Diamond. 

Button looked around him. He was lying on his back next to Spike and Diamond Tiara. They were on a comfy carpeted floor, against a big couch that he didn’t know why they weren’t using that couch, why weren’t they using the couch? He wanted to ask, but forgot why he wanted to know. Was it just for the sake of like, knowing things? And across from them Tree Hugger lay on her side. 

On the other side of the room looked like a completely different room from the one they were in, even though they were in the same room. It was pretty wild. There were wooden floors and wooden tables, and a kiln and a cabinet that was probably full of cool things, and the spinny things that potters used to make pots.

Button’s jaw dropped. “This room is so weird.”

“Yeah I don’t remember why this is here, but it’s cool sometimes,” Diamond said. 

“No,” Button said. He reached across Spike’s lap for Diamond’s hoof. She let him take it, and squeezed his hoof as he turned to look her in the eyes. “This is amazing, Diamond. I mean it. This is awesome.”

“Thank you,” Diamond whispered. 

She dropped his hoof. Button twisted and dropped his upper body into Spike’s lap. The dragon looked down at him, curious.

“I’m gonna miss Rumble,” Button said.

“Me too,” Spike replied. His eyes were dewy. 

“I’m sorry,” Button spoke again. “I don’t wanna make you sad.”

“I was crying all of last week,” said Spike. “I’m fine talking about it now. Are you okay, Button?”

Diamond passed Button a handful of clay. He twisted and squished it and squished it again as he contemplated his next words.

“I don’t think I’ve been okay for a while,” said Button. “I feel okay right now though.”

“Damn,” said Diamond.

Spike scratched the area directly behind his ears. Button tried not to moan.

It was really hard not to moan.

“Sometimes, to move forward, you have to look to your past,” Tree Hugger said.

Button’s eyes shot open. He hadn’t realized he had closed them, but it was a known fact in Ponyville that head scratches from a dragon was a pure, unsullied, beautiful thing, and it didn’t surprise him that he had instinctively gone to savor it. Spike had even filed his claws down for tonight. Probably because he was going to give Rumble a bunch of head scratches when the party was over. Probably while Rumble was sucking his—

“Wait,” Button said, turning his head so he could see Tree Hugger. “What did you say?”

Tree Hugger had a mound of clay the size of Button’s head. He wasn’t sure if she just got it or if he had never noticed it before, but it kind of scared him. She stared straight at him with her wise, knowing eyes.

“Sometimes, to move forward, you have to look to your past,” Tree Hugger said. Again.

“Celestia,” Button said. “You’re telling me that I have to do the exact opposite of what I’ve been doing for the past five years?”

“Caramel is so bucking good on pancakes, guys, you gotta try it,” Diamond Tiara mentioned.

Button told himself to remember that for later as Tree Hugger replied. 

“Sometimes, change is necessary for the—the evolution of the self.”

His chest felt like it was being lifted. The rest of his body too, but the chest first. He felt grabbed by a giant in the sky, pulling him towards the heavens as the true answer to all of his problems came like a prophecy in his tea leaves. Button’s eyes rolled into the back of his head and he sighed. If cloud nine were a place, he’d be there.

Spike gave his head another series of scratches. He jolted back from otherworldly pleasure to normal, plain old worldly pleasure. He regained his vision as his eyes swiveled back to their normal positions. 

Spike was looking at him. “You okay, dude?”

“I’m…” Button started, then took a moment to breathe slowly out of his mouth. “I’m amazing.”

“Sick.”

Something was poking his shoulder. Tree Hugger?

Button turned his head to see a tiny Princess Luna glaring at him.

“What in Tartarus,” he said quietly.

“Oh, yeah, the clay comes to life sometimes,” said Diamond. 

“Why?”

“Don’t remember.”

“I think I know what to do now,” Button announced. 

“Safe travels, my friend,” Tree Hugger said. Button got out of Spike’s lap to bump her hoof. 

He took a last glance at the room when he managed to walk to the door. Diamond Tiara was staring at the ceiling, and Spike was looking at him with a worried look.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

Spike’s brows furrowed. “You okay?”

“I’m great,” Button said. Then he left. His entire body still felt like it was in the air. 





“You know what I’ve always wanted?”

“To win a game of Equestria at War against me?”

“Well, that, obviously, but I’ve always wanted to hold the Storm King’s staff.”

“Is that a euphemism?”

“Ha ha. Seriously. Can you imagine me with the Storm King’s staff in my hooves, wings flared, shooting lightning into the sky?”

“I can’t. My brain doesn’t really allow for stupid things.”

“If that were true you’d spend more time with me instead of holing up in your room.”

Button stood in front of Twilight’s castle, his team at either side of him.

Skeedaddle was needed for his skill with rope, and because he was sneaky. 

Apple Bloom was needed because she could break through walls, possessed knowledge of the castle’s interior, and could distract anyone who happened to catch them, if they were caught. She also insisted on coming. 

The farmpony passed him a can of canned cider—one of the Apple Family’s newest creations. Button passed the can to Skeedaddle and took another for himself. 

Three identical crrks sounded out as they cracked their cans open and drank.

When the cans were open, they crushed them under their hooves.

“Still can’t believe we’re doing this,” Skeedaddle said. He cast a few nervous glances around them, looking for any signs of witnesses or danger. 

“This is it,” said Button. The cider flowed through him like...like a river or something. He was feeling it. “This is what’s going to make tonight perfect.”

“We can get in through that window,” Apple Bloom said, gesturing to a window on the second story. “Skee. Gimme a grappling hook.”

Skeedaddle pulled one out of his saddlebags and tossed it to Apple Bloom. The butter colored earth pony tested its weight, letting the hook hang from her hooves before she began to spin it. Button stepped back. He knew better than to try and get in her way when she was busy doing something physically demanding.

With a low grunt, Apple Bloom tossed the hook. Curled silver launched into the air, ascending in a slow, precise arc towards the window until it disappeared into the darkness beyond the window’s exterior. She gave the rope a tug, making sure it was nice and taut before looking to Skeedaddle. “Stallions first.”

The blue unicorn nodded and stepped forward to scale the wall. When he was a third of the way to the window, Apple Bloom gestured to Button.

Before he could take the rope, however, she stopped him in his tracks. 

“You okay?”
Button laughed. “Of course.”

“I mean, you’re livin’ and breathin’ but, you know...this—”

“Isn’t like me?” Button asked, smiling. “I know.”

He took the rope and began to climb, two ponylengths behind Skeedaddle. It had been a while since he had done something so physical, so a climb that should have, as a healthy adult earth pony, taken him about a minute or two, ended up stretching into seven. By the time that Button Mash was able to haul himself into the bathroom that the window offered access to, Skeedaddle had been able to take point and scour the halls for any security. 

Skeedaddle had found nopony, and after Apple Bloom let herself into the castle, they continued down a hall towards a case of stairs.

“You said it was in the basement?” Skeedaddle asked, his voice lowered to a whisper that a mouse would need to strain in order to hear.

It was a good thing that Apple Bloom’s (and Button’s) hearing was better than a mouse’s. It would have been an awkward question to leave unanswered. 

“Basement,” she confirmed. “There’s a pair of plain looking doors that lead into the artifact room.”

“You’d think that the doors would be cooler,” Skeedaddle said.

“Then burglars would know what they were looking for.”

“Who would try to steal from a princess?”

Apple Bloom didn’t answer. She simply raised a brow at the back of Skeedaddle’s head as they reached the stairs. Button tried not to laugh. 

One by one they descended down the stairs, their hooves lighter than powdered sugar. The castle was dark and asleep. Indigoes and navy blues glazed every inch of the interior. If there were anypony staying in the rooms, they wouldn’t be here.

They were probably safe, seeing that Twilight was staying in Canterlot Castle for the month. Since taking the throne she had alternated between living in Ponyville and the capital, effectively creating two seats of power for Equestria. In the meantime Spike and Starlight Glimmer had been left to live in Twilight’s castle, with Spike travelling between the two places as frequently as his surrogate older sister. 

Leaving Spike at the party was a tactical decision. Button figured that Rumble would notice if both of them were gone, and that would most definitely ruin the surprise.

He tried to picture Rumble’s face as he handed him the Storm King’s legendary staff. He could picture the lightning shooting out of it, and the rainstorm that it would trigger. He could see Rumble’s wings flaring out and his triumphant pose as Spike looked on in adoration, but he just couldn’t seem to picture Rumble’s face.

Trying to gauge what such a happy, proud expression would look like was impossible.

They reached the bottom of the stairs. Skeedaddle looked back at him and Apple Bloom. He looked back at Apple Bloom in turn.

The farmpony gestured to a pair of doors down the hall, matching the description that she gave earlier.

Halfway through the hall, Button wondered suddenly what the plan was if they got caught. Starlight Glimmer was a nice pony. He knew that. She had helped him beat a Luna’s Landing IV record once after showing up at the arcade. But he also knew that she was magically powerful enough to beat Twilight Sparkle in single combat. 

Apple Bloom will figure it out, he thought. The Crusaders could always get out of a jam if they needed, after a foalhood full of getting into trouble.

The doors came closer and closer as the group waded through suits of armor and old paintings. They were in front of them, soon enough, and with a small grunt of exertion Skeedaddle pushed them open.

Behind the doors was the room containing most of the important artifacts that Twilight Sparkle had kept a hold of after her many adventures. Glass cases put everything on display, glowing slightly with magic. Stray swords, chalices and chests full of treasure lay spread out in between the important stuff, unguarded and bare.

It’s too easy, Button thought. What—

Red streaked his vision. A single line, at first, Then another. And then they kept building, shooting off into different directions until a spiderweb of lasers was curled up against just about everything in the room. 

“It’s like a bucking spy movie,” remarked Skeedaddle. “What else?”

Apple Bloom pulled an apple out of her bow and tossed it into the lasers. 

As soon as the apple crossed one, electricity visibly coursed through it, and then it glowed purple, and then it was dust.

Button swallowed. Hard. He turned to Apple Bloom, but didn’t find her there.

A leg wrapped around his barrel as he was pulled back, lifted up, and readied like a javelin.

“A-Apple Bloom,” said Button. He was trying desperately not to yell.

“Relax,” she whispered. “This was your idea, remember? You see those buttons at the other side of the room?”

Button squinted through the lasers and the darkness, and he found a square metal panel with multiple buttons fixed onto it. 

“You see it,” Apple Bloom said, telling him rather than asking him. “I’m gonna throw you through the lasers.”

His heart galloped. His muscles tried to turn and run. He didn’t let himself. Button shut his eyes. “Then what?”

“I think it’ll come naturally.”

Button was thrown. It was a lot like swimming in a river, except not relaxing at all. As he cruised through the air he tried not to move a muscle. Repeating streaks of glowing, bright red passed his visions and peripherals. He made himself stay stiff. He wanted to close his eyes, but couldn’t. He was too scared to.

His arc reached its peak, and he began to descend. His mane waved madly into his eyes and past his ears. The floor glided towards him.

He landed. Button flexed, putting every ounce of his strength into staying still, resisting the momentum he had built up. With a strangled cry he succeeded, and only managed to slam his forehead into the wall, directly above the panel with all the buttons.

“Good job!” Apple Bloom said, her hushed voice travelling across the room. “Now get us in there!”

Button stared down at the buttons. The buttons stared back.

He didn’t realize his hoof was so close to one when he drew it back, shocked at himself.

What are you doing? said a tired, bleeding voice.
His other hoof came within centimetres of touching another button when he drew that one back, as well.

Button’s breath hitched as he stared down. The buttons were unlabeled. They were all black. Indistinguishable from one another. Only somepony who knew the correct sequence could turn off the security system.

His hooves moved on their own, but stopped before touching the buttons.

A tiny laugh spilled out of his mouth. He suppressed it, but a smile stayed, holding onto his lips. 

What are you doing? said the voice again.

What I was made to do, he told it.

His hooves touched the buttons, and faster than his neurons normally worked, they were all over the panel. It was like he was playing a piano. One of those grand, gold-plated ones that you saw at church or in old castles. He moved with speed and precision and the best thing was that he didn’t think. He didn’t need to.

Button Mash did his job, and within ten seconds the security system was down.

The hoofsteps of his friends took him out of his stupor. He turned to see Skeedaddle and Apple Bloom already in front of a glass display case.

“Think this is it?” Skeedaddle asked.

“I know it is,” answered Apple Bloom.

Button joined them, stepping in between as he took in the display’s contents: a long, long staff covered in wrappings. 

“How do we get it out?” Button asked.

Apple Bloom laughed and tapped the display with her hoof twice. The staff moved on its own, passing through the glass. It turned onto its side mid-air before drifting slowly into Button’s hooves.

Button stared down at the thing with dinner-plate pupils. “I can’t believe we actually stole it.”

“Borrowed it,” Apple Bloom said. “Spike’ll have it back in its proper place in no time.”

“What are we waiting for, then?” Skeedaddle asked, laughing. 

Seafoam green and light engulfed Button’s vision. He felt the tug of magic on every inch of his being, and then he was no more.

Then he was somewhere else.

A bedroom.

Starlight Glimmer had inherited the master bedroom of Twilight’s castle. That was easy to see. The room was spacious and beautiful. Various posters and pictures decorated the walls. A writing desk, bookshelf and a display case full of kites sat quaintly to the side, but Button wasn’t focused on those. His eyes lay on the Celestia sized bed that lay in front of him and his friends.

The backsides of Starlight Glimmer and Trixie jutted out towards them. Button saw everything.

He barely even felt the staff of the Storm King float out of his hoof and make its way towards the two mares, bandages slowly unwrapping to reveal that in fact, it was not the staff that Button had wanted. 

When he and Rumble were foals, once, they had drawn a crude depiction of Apple Bloom’s brother, and what they thought her brother’s private regions might have looked like. She had yelled at them for that.

Well, no, she had yelled at them for sneaking it into her room, rolling it up and forging Celestia’s brand, making it look like a personal letter from the sun princess herself.

What the staff really was reminded him of that picture, brought to life.

To his left, Skeedaddle squeaked. 

The mares on the bed stopped stiff, and with the wet sound of lips leaving lips, Starlight Glimmer turned to find three red faced teenagers staring at her in her own bedroom.

Trixie screamed, but had her mouth covered by Starlight’s hoof.

A tail clamped itself over what Button was staring at. He turned his head slightly upwards to look his impending death in the eyes.

“I—I lost a contact lense,” Apple Bloom said. “In the Artifact room.”

“We were helping her find it,” Skeedaddle said.

Button didn’t speak. Starlight Glimmer had turned to face them now. Her expression was like a statue. Not unlike the statue of her that stood in Thorax’s changeling hive, actually. Button was suddenly reminded of a field trip there. He figured it was his mind getting a head start on having his life flash before his eyes.

Starlight Glimmer’s eyes were like a dead fish’s. Or a bird. A cold, unfeeling bird of prey. 

“Get.” She began to crawl towards them, the mattress squeaking underneath her hoof. “Out.”

“Skeedaddle,” Button squawked. “Teleport us out of here!”

“But I can’t—”

Button moved faster than he ever had, grabbing the unicorn by the neck and shouting in his face. “Do you want to die?”

Skeedaddle’s eyes widened and then shut as his horn came ablaze with magic.

They were outside again. Without the staff. 

Skeedaddle dropped to the ground. Magical exhaustion.

Button’s body relished in the cool night air, but the pleasure that it gave was unfulfilling in the face of what just happened. He numbly turned back to the road. Diamond Tiara’s house was twenty minutes away. 

He began to walk. As he did, a familiar numbness set in, starting at his throat and worming down to his chest and stopping at his stomach. 

He had failed.





Button was feeling familiar feelings. One of which was the feeling of inexplicable itchiness due to the glass surrounding him. And then there was the bitter taste in his mouth, bringing him back to a time that he and Rumble had attempted to eat half a lime whole each, peel and all. The taste of the lime’s skin lingered in his mouth for hours afterwards, tainting just about everything he had tried to eat.

The only thing that was somewhat comforting was the feeling of the giant octopus’s thick, velveteen tentacles and head covering his body up to the beginning of his neck. 

He was back a Diamond Tiara’s, and he was back in the glass room. Where he started. Where he had truly started his journey at the party, after that horrid drinking game. 

Maybe once, he would have been content to sit and watch the party, feeling happy that no one was paying attention to him. Now, even that didn’t make him feel better, though he was still thankful for the lack of attention.

Button wanted to go home. He wanted to go to his bed and sleep and not wake up for days. He wanted to be where tonight was last week, and the memory of everything that happened was old and foggy, but he wasn’t anywhere but the present. 

The door to the room opened, very obviously. The sounds of drunken mirth and cheer broke through, surrounding Button as his eyes closed. 

“I’m fine, Apple Bloom, it’s whatever,” he said.

The door closed, and somepony sat beside him. Button put his chin on the floor.

A wing draped over him, careful not to squeeze him too tight. There was only one pony who took that much care with him. 

“What do you want?” he asked. 

“I just missed you.”

Button laughed, but his face was so weighed down by the frown that followed that he could have sworn he never laughed at all.

“Apple Bloom said you were upset.”

“Did she.”

“Are you?”

Button shook his head. 

Rumble’s wing pet his back gently. 

Button’s eyes were wet. He didn’t bother hiding it. His eyes were closed anyway, and covering them with his hooves would have been a dead giveaway.

“What’s wrong, Bee? I couldn’t find you all night, so I assumed you were either home or having fun for once.” Rumble shifted, coming a little closer. “I don’t like being wrong.”

“I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Did I just not say?”

“Yeah but sometimes you say ‘I’m fine’ but you’re not really fine and you feel like you just can’t get into it because I’d never understand because I’m so awesome and how could someone awesome like me even be friends with you or genuinely be concerned for your well being, am I right?”

Button stayed quiet, and Rumble waited, as he always did, for him to finally gather the courage to say what he needed to.

“I tried to steal the Storm King’s staff,” he blurted out.

Rumble was surprised. Shocked, even. Button could tell from the way his breath hitched.

“Why?”

“You always wanted to hold it, so I figured that I could get it for you”

“What? You didn’t want to bring me?”

“It was supposed to be a surprise.”

“It’s surprise enough already that you even tried to pull that off!”

Rumble was right, of course. He was always right. 

A million other ways to spend the night entered Button’s mind. He could have stayed with Rumble the whole time. Or thought of a game to play, one of Rumble’s favorites. Or even just talk to Rumble beyond a single conversation in the bathroom. Something. Something more.

“I’m stupid,” Button muttered. 

“Don’t say that.”

“But—”

“Don’t.” Rumble came closer and, after hesitating, nuzzled his neck briefly.

That didn’t help. Button was finding it harder to breathe. Thought after thought after thought came through to his mind. He should have done something else. Been someone else. Why wasn’t he someone else?

“Hey—hey,” Rumble soothed. ”I’m right here. Try and calm yourself, Bee. Everything’s fine. I’m here. Everything is alright.”

Minutes passed. Button didn’t die. When he was breathing regularly again he opened his eyes and looked at Rumble.

The pegasus looked back at him, smiling and concerned.

“I wanted to make you proud,” said Button, his voice breaking. “Do something crazy tonight. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t even dance with Scootaloo for more than one song.”

“But you wanted to,” Rumble said, like it was the most wonderful thing in the world. “You wanted to, and you tried.”

He tried to speak again several more times. Button stayed quiet. 

When Rumble finally spoke, it was in a tone that Button dared not interrupt.

“Celestia, Button, I—you stopped trying a while ago and that made me cry. I cried a lot. I really did. But you’re trying again and that’s—” He swallowed. “That’s so good. I am proud of you.”

Button tried to answer, but Rumble shushed him.

“Not done yet,” he said. “Change doesn’t happen overnight, Bee. And you shouldn’t just change for me. You should change because you want to. So, to me, it feels like you want to...but, you know, do you?”

At first, Button didn’t know what to say. Of course he wanted to change. What, did Rumble think that he asked to be like this? But then he thought about it a little more.

He wasn’t a very social pony. He couldn’t do events like tonight regularly. He could never. And that was okay. 

What wasn’t okay was being scared. Fear was never an answer, and he knew that. Sometimes, fear was too strong to resist, but that’s what friends were for, right? It wasn’t like anything else he had tried had been successful, anyhow.

And he didn’t have to do it alone, or all at once, or a lot. He just had to try and let himself fail a little bit, and that was okay, wasn’t it? 

Change doesn’t happen overnight.

Button put a leg around his best friend’s neck, smiling at his shocked expression, and nodded. 

“I want to do this,” said Button. “I want to. Am I saying that right?”

It was like Celestia had never existed, and Rumble was the princess of the sun instead. His smile was radiant and regal and—and it was so proud. His eyes were bright and his ears were up, his teeth sparkled and even the way his nostrils flared all blended together like the different parts of an orchestra, and the song that it was playing was the most beautiful song in the world.

So that’s what his face would have looked like, Button thought. 

His vision turned to pale gray as Rumble hugged him with all his might, and Button didn’t feel the urge to push him away. Not even a little bit.

“I’m gonna miss you so much,” he said.

“I’ll try and come home as often as I can, Bee. I still have to beat you at like, two thirds of the games you’re hoarding at your house.”

“Don’t forget the seventy-five percent of the games at the arcade.”

They laughed together a moment, breathless in their mutual catharsis.

“...But like what was stealing the staff like? Like, impossible? Easy? Could we maybe swing by next time I’m back? Just asking.”



“Rumble?” he said. Outside of the room, the party was still burning bright, and nopony paid them much mind.

“What’s up?” 

“I’m not sure what to do now.”

“What do you want to do?”

“I–I don’t know. I kind of want to go home, but I don’t really want to, either. And I’m sick of booze.”

Rumble craned his neck to look outside the glass. Button watched him, curious. The pegasus looked like he was searching for something. A glass of water, maybe? Water sounded like it’d be really, really nice right then.

Then Rumble’s eyes widened, and the excitement in them negated that possibility.

“What did you find?” Button asked.

“You said you wanted to change?”

“Yeah…” he said, narrowing his eyes.

“Well,” Rumble said, smirking. “That dance with Scootaloo doesn’t seem like a bad place to start.”








If the best dancer was poetry in motion, Scootaloo was a rock opera.

Every sway of her flanks was a tribute to grace. Every step of her hooves and shake of her shoulders served only to hypnotize those who were lucky enough to watch. She was the music. Each drumbeat, synth note, chopped up vocal sample—each of them were for her.

She danced alone, but that was fine. Every now and then a friend would come and join her, and then leave. She’d keep going. She’d dance until someone needed her for something, or until the music stopped. 

Scootaloo spun and swayed and shimmied and glided and turned—and then she was nose to nose with Button Mash.

Surprise flashed in her eyes. Then there was delight.

“Well, hey there, hot-shot,” she said. “I missed you.”

Button smiled. “Do you wanna dance?”

Scootaloo stopped herself from blurting out a ‘Yes!’ and dragging him off. Her eyes turned soft, and she leaned forward a little, speaking quietly. “Everypony might look at us again. We’re like, really good together.”

“That’s—that’s okay,” he said. And he meant it. He took a second to calm himself, but not anything longer, and he nuzzled her cheek. Then he took her hoof. “The worst thing that could happen is that I run away and come back to you again later, right?”

Scootaloo’s cheeks were burning hot. She grinned and wrapped a leg around his neck. “Right.”

Button let her lead him away. Soon enough, he was on a moonlit cliff overlooking Mount Aris. The stars above sparkled like they had just been polished. The sea in the distance was relaxed as it swayed, like a heartbeat. And even though he was dancing with a mare he liked and he didn’t know how to dance, or didn’t know who was watching, everything for the moment was calm.