Darkness
Twilight awoke to the sudden realization of danger, her heart began to pound forewarning. As she found herself in a dimly lit room, no windows or doors. Or perhaps she was just facing away from any entrance. She lifted her head, as a mild epiphany of pain pulsed through her skull. Aching as she came to the understanding that she was sitting in a chair. Twilight tried to stand, but found herself restrained beyond her recollection.
Immediate laughter rang through the walls, a mockery of joy. As Twilight turned her gaze to find the source of the uncanny mirth. The spotlight casting a perfect circle of light around her making it hard to see very far into the darkness. The laughter echoed off the shadows, and seemed to bounce around like popped party balloons. Twilight's eyes adjusted to find streamers hanging from the unfinished ceiling above. Dripping with entrails and blackened blood that dripped from far above. Staining the stone foundation with their scarlet teardrops. The single light hanging like a cadaver, was assaulting and bright to her gaze. As she felt the frantic alarms pulsing through her heartbeat, as she felt the pain settle in once more.
Metal clanged abrasively against the stone floor, the sound accompanied by the harsh squishy crackle of bones, as Twilight's gaze immediately found what she feared. In the darkness, the hunched form of a pony slowly crept into view, as Pinkamena stared with lifeless eyes. Witness to the murder scene hiding in the deep, as the smell hit Twilight with a sickening brunt. More and more body parts of disassembled ponies haunted her vision. As Twilight's eyes adjusted to the dark. Pinkamena stood, mouth agape, in a facade of jubilee. As the disembodied laughter echoed all around. Growing in volume, as it attacked Twilight's ears with its mockery. Before being cut into a single whisper.
"Are we not, Friends?"
Twilight was terrified, but managed to find her voice. "W-what?"
"Are We Not, Friends?"
The question repeated, and Twilight's mind was racing for an answer. This couldn't possibly be real, right? Twilight wanted nothing more than to assure herself of such, but her struggling for truth was wasted. Fruitless in any amount of mental endeavor, as she struggled against steadfast chains. The thing stared, wearing the decaying skin of the party pony, yet it could not hide it's perversion of happiness from Twilight's terror. The slack jaw swung on broken hinges, as if trying to speak. Its aimless tongue writhing in uncoordinated degradation, as inky black tendrils started to seep from those lifeless eyes. Those haunting eyes, that saw without seeing, captivating Twilight's gaze in their prison. As she could not escape.
"Are We Not, Friends?"
The inky blackness melted to the floor, before slowly creeping closer to Twilight. Frantically she tried to push the chair away, but to no avail. As the tendrils reached out, wrapping themselves around Twilight. As she stammered, to speak her dismay. Until all that she could do more was scream. All the while the question repeated, caught on an endless loop of torment.
"Are We Not, Friends?"
Twilight lurched, arching her back in strain. Trying to free herself, as she screamed louder. Longer than she'd ever screamed, determined to continue until her lungs burst if necessary. Tears of desperation streamed down to meet the darkness, as it slowly engulfed her. Choking her voice, as they wrapped around her throat. Twilight jerked, struggling to break free. As the tendrils began to crawl into her open mouth, caught in frozen terror, choking her in frigid fear while slithering down her throat. As all faded once more to black.
Are... We... Not... Friends?
Twilight awoke in spastic pain, as she gasped for air. Frantically casting her eyes around, as beads of sweat dripped from her exhausted fur. She took a few rapid breaths in the silence. Before coming to realize she was back in her own bed. She glanced around to the comfort of her books, and the sunlight shining through the open window. Warding off whatever darkness her mind had conjured with its warming glow. As the realization washed over her tense body. Aiding to give it slivers of relief.
It was just a dream...
Just a... Dream.
Her mind laughed, with a haunting chill that forced a shiver from her shoulders. As Twilight glanced about in the hopes of finding Spike, or somepony to share the freezing solace with. But found the room vacant of any living souls. She raised a hoof to nurse a growing pain in her head, to find her forehooves were thickly bandaged. Snugly wrapped with caring white swathes, beneath the sleeves of her dark blue sweater. The gesture made a smile tug at her frown, as she rolled her eyes at what Pinkie had done.
I guess there ain't no hiding secrets from that one...
She mused with her thoughts, finding it a blessed curse to her ill mind. She let out a sigh, rolling to the other side of the bed. Finding it's fresh frigid sheets welcoming to her slightly steaming cheeks. As she wondered as to where the pink pony had vanished. Had it all been a dream? Twilight silently hoped not, she wished to have somepony care for her. When she couldn't even find it in herself to do so.
She lost herself in thoughts of the unexplained mystery that was Pinkie Pie, and how it tempted her with its mercy. Even as the smell of seasoned pumpkin and spice tingled her nose. As she tried to dream of a happier future, rather than the dark halls of a dungeon, or wasted land of an outcast's exile.
A gentle knock at the door made Twilight rise with startled excitement. As she turned to find the pink mare wheeling in a trolley laden high with pumpkin pancakes, and ice cream cupcakes. Twilight momentarily wondered how the once again bubbling party pony had wheeled it up the curving flight of stairs. And more over how she hadn't heard it coming. Yet another piece of mystery to the puzzle of Pinkie Pie. For now she was willing to accept the good misfortune of getting her wish. She was not completely alone.
Twilight felt a sickening giddy in her stomach, at the sight of the haphazardly happy party pony. An ethereal aching that made her want nothing more than to drive an edge into herself. Dissecting the illness from her body by force, and expel all manner of rich ruby jubilation all across the bedding and floor of her room. And yet, the pain that caused her to shake, and eyes to fill with raindrops. Made the euphoria rushing through her cheeks, burn with passion.
I'm just reacting to the embarrassment of crying...
Twilight lied to herself. Pushing the ember of unwanted possibility from her mind. Suddenly flinching at the reminder of her dream. The haunting smile and vacant eyes, that haunted the mirrors of Twilight's reality. Making it hard for her to search them for any sign of herself. She couldn't face it. Instead focusing on the plate of generous pancakes that Pinkie offered her with a gruesome gleeful smile.
"Rough dream?" Pinkie asked, carefully. Causing Twilight to merely grumble an acknowledgement, as she rubbed her tired eyes. No longer enjoying the brilliant sun shining through the window.
Sunshine?....
Twilight turned to the window. Staring out into the clear brilliance, until her eyes adjusted. Finding the azure sky shining with faded tragedy. At dark clouds drifting lazily away with the wind. Thinning beyond the lands of Equestria. Twilight stammered for words, for inquiry, for an explanation. Trying to organize her thoughts of what possibly could have caused such salvation.
"Sunshine...." She managed, staring out into the gathering daylight.
"Oh, right..." Pinkie sadly smiled at the remark. As understanding filled the quiet. "The smoke is gone, and from what I can tell... So is the dragon."
"What, really?" Twilight asked in disbelief. "How?"
"I dunno...." Pinkie shrugged, devouring a cupcake in mild dissatisfaction.
"So, our entire efforts were worthless? A complete waste of time and effort?..." Twilight demanded, a bit exasperated and annoyed at the thought.
"Well, I wouldn't say they were worthless..." Pinkie flinched at the bitter words on her tongue.
"It's more like it was, unnecessary... I tried to do what I thought was best, but..." Pinkie's eyes wavered in their watery gaze, as water welled in them. "I just made things worse... For the story, for the solution I thought I could control... But when it came down to it, I... I couldn't..."
Pinkie's bubbling burst, and she quickly shoved another cupcake into her mouth to stifle the sobs. As Twilight watched her with uncertainty. Hesitantly patting Pinkie in return, before being squeezed in yet another impossibly tight embrace.
"Alright.... That's -enough..." Twilight gasped, prying Pinkie's hold loose enough to push free. "Thanks for the pancakes."
She said gratefully, as the moment between them passed. The tension falling back to an equilibrium within the quiet of the library. As Twilight began to nibble away at her portion of breakfast. The rest of the meal passed, uninterrupted as Pinkie sedated her own sorrows with more sugar. Twilight found her own hunger pained, as her thoughts drifted to darker depths.
"So... Don't you have to go to work at the bakery soon?.. Or something..." Twilight asked with forbidden hope, finally breaking the silence. Pinkie didn't respond, she didn't bounce from the bed, or rush for the door. She simply lay there, taking a long breath in before letting it out slowly.
"No..."
"No?!"
"I called today in, and said I needed a day off..." Pinkie slouched, looking at the far wall in her glum. "The Cake's were pretty understanding..."
"Oh..." Twilight said nonchalantly, finding a few choice words she let bounce around insider her mind. "So, you're going to stay here and babysit me then?" Twilight asked, not caring to mention the reason for such.
"Nope!" Pinkie giggled, as she lazily put a hoof to Twilight's nose. Causing Twilight to blink in disdained surprise, only causing the pink party pony to laugh harder in response. Until she was snorting, which coaxed a few polite giggles from Twilight as well. As she joined in such a prospect of joy. Pinkie eventually calmed down enough to stammer her suggestion as she hugged her stomach in pain.
"I was gonna take you to visit Fluttershy, and see how Spike's doing with her animals. Get some fresh air, and maybe help out if it's needed."
"I'd rather die..." Twilight rolled her eyes in dismay. Blunt, honest, and to the point with her short lived contempt.
"Oh, you lovable lamenting loaf, you." Pinkie booped Twilight once more, playfully. Before bouncing off the bed, and gathering up the leftovers of breakfast in a hurry. Before jumping on the trolley, and rolling towards the stairs. Disappearing in a chaotic hailstorm, as she tumbled out of sight. In a swirling blur of dishes and pancakes collapsing to the floor...
Multiple times...
Before hitting the bottom...
"Be ready in 5 minutes!" Pinkie's voice called, as the cacophony quieted. And Twilight let out a sigh she had been holding. As she raised a hoof to her face. She didn't want to, but did she even have a choice?
No..... No, of course not...
Twilight trudged along, dragging her hooves through the ash, as she followed Pinkie's bouncing steps, reluctantly. The streets were mostly deserted, no doubt thanks to the still bountiful ash heaps. Lining the pathway like unwelcome lingering snow on a fine sunny day. No pony seemed to be out. The doors shut, and curtains drawn, as the two passed on seemingly unnoticed through the town. If it weren't for the ash in need of removal, it would've felt like a ghost town, but Twilight understood the townsfolk's reluctance to deal with such a task. Twilight watched the ground, following the empty hoofprints Pinkie's bouncing glee left in the sandy soot. As Twilight allowed her mind to drift, letting the sound of crunching crackling under their hooves to carry her thoughts elsewhere.
Twilight was pretty sure they weren't taking the most direct route, from the library to Fluttershy's cottage. But she figured if she asked, Pinkie would say something generically optimistic. Like telling her to stop and smell the roses. When there clearly were none in sight for miles, and all Twilight could smell was the fresh aftertaste of bitter smog. Despite the fresh chill in the breeze.
Twilight merely trudged on in the grainy sand, as Pinkie bounced about with more energy than she should have been capable of. Smiling with such selfless cheer, it made Twilight grimace in envy of such capacities of happiness. It made Twilight wonder if she were to slice her open, if joy itself would come pouring out to quench her soul's drought of it. The thought was utterly ridiculous, Twilight knew for a fact, but it gave her enough courage to meet Pinkie's sickening smile with her own.
The winding path through backstreets, finally wound themselves arriving at Fluttershy's cluttered home. To find a familiar Rainbow Dash, grumbling as she was in the bouts of shoveling piles of ash. Clearing the paths and walkways, as well as the burrows of various grumpy snakes and critters. As Fluttershy tried to help, despite Rainbow's insistence on not needing her assistance.
"I can't do this..." Twilight heard Pinkie mutter under her breath. She lifted her gaze, to inspect the solemn party pony's hesitancy next to her. Feeling a twinge of annoyance at the failing fortitude. She wanted to lash out in the sudden flow of anger, but settled for itching her scarred flesh. Biting back her unpleasant short fuse, with the fresh stings of warmth.
Are you kidding me?!...
"Hey..." Twilight tried, to find any sliver of empathy to offer. Unable to find it in herself to cheer the party pooper, but rather decided to take karma's generous offer, in the irony of twisting fate. "You dragged me across Ponyville, you're not getting out of this that easily."
"But, I-" Pinkie tried to protest, but Twilight was already dragging her with her magic. Despite Pinkie's hooves digging into the ground in dismay. Her reluctance melting to acceptance as Twilight dragged her along. Until they finally crossed the wooden arched bridge overlooking the dismally polluted pond's brook.
"Hey, Fluttershy..." Twilight broke the scene, waltzing the pathway, before plopping the gutless Pinkie Pie beside her. "... Rainbow Dash. Nice day we're having."
"Speak for yourself..." Rainbow Dash grunted in annoyance of Twilight's cheerful veneer.
"Oh, hello Twilight... Pinkie Pie." Fluttershy greeted them welcoming to the two interlopers.
"Hiya, we came to help out, and I can see you could use a lot of help. I'll go start clearing some of the ash in the back... Catch up with you later!" Pinkie was bursting with nerves, as she sped past Fluttershy in a whirlwind of action. Suddenly leaving Twilight to carry on any semblance of conversation of explanation.
"Sorry, about Pinkie..." Twilight sighed, "I -um... Could I help you back inside? Maybe help you with anything you need done in the kitchen?"
"Oh, I... I don't really want to be a burden..." Fluttershy tried to lie. Stifling a cough, as wind swept some ash from the heaps back into the air.
"You, really don't have to be out here..." Twilight tried bumbling through her thoughts, trying to play the part of caring.
"That's what I've been trying to tell her!" Rainbow Dash interrupted, moving on to brushing ash off the birdhouses. Aggravated and clearly frustrated by Fluttershy's stubborn hospitality. "But she won't listen!"
"I see..." Twilight fought a habitual eye roll, at Fluttershy's lack of self care. It brought a smile of perverse understanding. "Why don't we go inside, and make Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie..... Some lunch?"
"Lunch?" Fluttershy seemed surprised, looking about suddenly wayward and lost. "Is it really almost that time of day?"
"Probably not... But we should get it ready for when it is." Twilight prompted, giving the overbearingly kind pegasi enough of a motivation to be helpful.
"Oh, well.... If Rainbow and Pinkie don't mind me not helping them..."
"Just go already! I can handle this." Rainbow Dash insisted.
"And Pinkie Pie?...." Fluttershy began.
"I'm sure she'll be super extra hungry.... After doing whatever she's doing..." Twilight reassured her. Beginning to walk towards the cottage door. Fluttershy seemed hesitant, but decided to follow.
"So....." Twilight began, as they entered the cottage and made their way through the packed living room of refuged creatures, towards the kitchen. "Any preference as to what to make for lunch? Sandwiches, salad, soup?..."
"Oh, I don't know...." Fluttershy began, continuing her unobtrusive neutrality. Too afraid to even suggest what she would want, lest Celestia forbid, it offend any of her 'friends.' Twilight's annoyance was caught in the sight of a set of knives. So well kept, and glistening in their hold. The sight was sharply enticing, as Twilight reached out with her magic to draw the beautiful blade for inspection. It brought a selfish smile to her face.
"Uhm... Twilight?" Fluttershy's voice came in hesitation. Twilight caught her tainted reflection in the blade's edge, and whirled on Fluttershy. Perhaps a bit too quick, as Fluttershy flinched like the coward she was. The pegasi gulping down her unnerve filled frightened inquiry, . "Is anything... wrong?...."
"Oh, nothing's wrong...." Twilight was swift to respond, slightly embarrassed at the threatening demeanor she had scared Fluttershy with, in a moment of weakness.
"I've just decided on what we'll make. How does vegetable and noodle soup sound?" Twilight said, as cheerfully as she could. Faking her best smile and bubbly personality, as she impaled the knife upon a cutting board.
"J-just, lovely..." Was all Fluttershy managed to say. As Twilight directed her to fill the pot with water. While she began levitating some fresh vegetables to the counter, in preparation of cutting. The rest of the meal's preparation went on in silence. Save for the noise of the flawless blade, slicing its perfect edge through the crunching of potatoes, and various other veggies. Twilight did her best, to hide the eager smile, at the sedative thought of the repetitive task being used to bring her forbidden joy.
All it would take.... A simple slip up... A moment of distraction.... That's all it would take....
Twilight almost felt she had the lungs for laughter at the thought. As she drove the knife deep into a rich juicy tomato. It's faint scarlet juice spilling across the wooden cutting board, as Twilight willed her imagination to almost believe it were blood.
Just a simple.... slip of the blade....
Twilight drove the knife deeper still. Her hunger for pain, the only thing rushing through her bloody ears.
Just a simple...
"Ow!"
The breathless exclamation snapped Twilight out of her silence, as red velvet ran across yellow fur. Twilight dropped the knife, as resentment boiled her insides. Not at Fluttershy, who's blood now painted droplets across the cutting board, but at herself for being so selfishly unaware, of Fluttershy's reaching for the diced vegetables.
"No... No, no, no, no, no...." Twilight whined, breathless, at the sight. Her body shaken with the realization of how carelessly cursed she truly was. It made her want to drive that knife down her throat, and tear out every last pit in her stomach. As Fluttershy gingerly retracted her hoof protectively, while applying pressure to the wound gingerly.
"I am so, so, so sorry...." Twilight pleaded, guiding Fluttershy to the sink, to wash and dress the wound properly. As she searched the cupboards with her magic for some bandages.
No you're not... You don't really care...
"Yes, I do..." Twilight breathed, barely above a whisper.
"What?"
"Nothing... I found some bandaids, let's clean the cut first." Twilight directed, as she turned on some cool water. Helping Fluttershy's shaking form, rinse the sin away. As Twilight sanitized the scratch, Fluttershy flinched in pain, but relinquished her desire to hide from its discomfort. Twilight smiled, perhaps reassuringly, but inwardly. It was just a bandaid to cover and hide her inner glee, at the small inklings of infection purged from the pure pegasus pony.
As it should be... pure, and free from my taint....
From me....
Twilight used a kitchen towel hanging nearby, to dry the cleaned cut, and proceeded to bandage the small cut. It wasn't very deep, thankfully, but it had bled a ton for it's small slit of a slip. Twilight dug the torment into herself further, at her laps in control. As she helped Fluttershy, with misshapen steps, to her couch. Gently laying her to rest, despite the kind pegasi's resistance.
"I.... I can still help!"
"Don't worry, we were just gonna throw in the last bit of carrots, and then wait for it to cook anyway..." Twilight comforted the stressed Fluttershy, from worrying further. Practically doing the rest of the tasks with her magic while she spoke.
"See, nothing to worry about."
"Oh, but I..... Ok...." Fluttershy conceded. Taking her rest on the couch, as concerned animals gently gathered closer to provide their caretaker with deserved comfort. Twilight left her there, as she returned to the kitchen to rinse the blood from the cutting board, and knife. Pausing as she found herself alone, once more.
It's almost perfect.....
Too perfect....
Twilight stared at her reflection as her gaze fixated upon the knife's blade. Reflecting her sinful desires, and pleasure in it's faulty facade. As it cut through her mask, revealing the truth broken and scattered beneath. Twilight let the shredded swaths fall away, revealing scarred flesh beneath. The knife levitated above her skin, as she stood over the kitchen sink. Mere moments away from satisfying the craving inside her. Of self hate, and stored away resentments. Time seemed to still, the world holding its breath, as Twilight hesitated.
A gasp of shock cut its way into Twilight's ears. It rang sharply in the solace as water began to boil in the room's climbing tension. Twilight turned to find Fluttershy had been creeping back to the kitchen, no doubt to offer further help, only to discover Twilight's taboo.
"I.... I.... I...." Fluttershy began to stammer, unsure of what to do. Uncertain of what she had become witness to.
A familiar voice echoed from deeper in the home, possibly from upstairs. Calling for Fluttershy's attention, no doubt to offer further help. As Spike's footsteps approached. Falling down stair steps rapidly, as his clawed footfalls matched the rhythm of Twilight's beating fragile heart.
Twilight was frozen with absolute putrid revolt at Fluttershy's discovery, and the possibility of Spike finding her in her lies. It was bad enough that Pinkie had found her like this, and to burden such a pure mind as Fluttershy's, or even Spike's, inflicted lacerations to Twilight's crumbling crippled heart. Magic gleamed, bursting to life, as Twilight did the only thing she could think to do. Run away from confrontation. As Spike began to round the corner of the kitchen, Twilight blinked out of existence. Leaving a gaping Fluttershy in her confusion, and her dragon helper to turn off the rushing water of her kitchen's sink. Fluttershy's finest knife, however, was gone.