*dingalingaling*
*gasp!* Is that-? IT IS! Hiya! I was just going to shut down for the night, but now that you're here, I don't want to shut down anything! What're ya here for?
Oh, the cupcakes? Sure! I'll see if I got any. Hold on just a sec and I'll be right back!
...There we go. What kind of cake do you want? Chocolate? Vanilla? Lemon? Strawberry? Red velvet? Blue velvet? Green velvet? Pink velvet? Ha ha ha ha! I'm teasing! So! Which do you want?
Ooh! I like that flavor too! You seem to always pick that one whenever you come to Sugarcube Corner. I can't complain. I like to pick the same kinds of dessert too! But I occasionally like to spice things up on my desserts! For example… have you heard of oregano?
What do you mean, not that kind of spice? Oohhh… I see what you mean. Oregano would be totally out of the question on a cupcake.
Paprika would work instead!
Hey, you're laughing! Aww, I made you laugh! Hee hee, I like it when I make you laugh. It gives me this… happy little feeling inside of me. Like a butterfly in my belly. You gotta be careful, though. If you do actually have butterflies in your tummy, you need to get that checked out.
The same goes for if you have a frog in your throat?! Ha ha ha ha ha! I never even thought of that one! You're funny! Ah… we're like two cups in a cake, aren't we? Wait, no, that's not the right expression. Peas in a pod! That's it! Silly me!
Done with your cupcake? Just throw the wrapper out. And don't worry about paying! This one is on the casa! That's Prench for "free."
Why is it free? Well, um… we've, uh, had leftovers, and we're trying to get rid of them, so, ah, yeah. It's free. Besides, you're a great customer! And...a good friend…
Are you going home after this? It must be hard, living in an apartment. It's so small and you don't have any room to store your streamers and kazoos!
Here, want to see where I live? It's just riiiiight up those steps in the back. Come on come on come on, I'll show ya!
You know, now that you mention it, it is kinda fitting for me to live in a decked-out cookie. I never thought much of it, really. It's just another part of who I am.
You should never deny the parts of you that just yearn to be expressed, you feel me? Like my passion for baking and throwing the biggest birthday bashes in Equestria! And you! You're also really important! You're my first-ever hyoo-man friend.
You're really different from us. But you're also really fun! You always have such a goofy smile on your cute face whenever you're around me. At the parties I throw, you're always talking to me and making me laugh. You just feel...more alive around me, I've noticed. I've seen you at other times, like when you're going to work or sitting at the park benches or just...sitting in a corner. And lemme tell you, you look super-duper grey when I see that. But then the color seems to return to you somehow when I ask you what's wrong.
...Are you okay? I never like seeing my friends super-duper sad! And I can't be there for you all the time.
You're doing fine, huh? Well, in my experience, the only ponies who say they're fine are the ponies going through a struggle.
…
...Here we are. My room. Voila! Sound the trumpet! Do do-do-do dooo! Presentiiiing, my place!
...Pink? Yeah. That's what it is. I always know what you're going to say. Don't pretend you can hide any secrets from me, buster! Anyhoo! La la la la la! Boing!
Ha ha ha! I love my bed! It's soft and squishy and warm. Like you. Pi-toink!
Oh! I caught that! You laughed at that! You like it when I poke you in the belly! Pi-toink! Boink! Booka booka BOO-! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! St-stooo~op! Hee hee! You're poking my belly! That's against the RU-Ha ha ha ha! Oooh! Okay, okay, you win! You win! Just stop tickling me!
Haa...haa...haa...haa…
...Ohh, man...I didn't even know it was possible, but...I actually feel tired out. I just wanna collapse into you.
Aaand I'm feeling it now.
*ploomf*
Nope, nope, don't move, just… stay… aahh…
Hee hee… my mane is really bouncy, isn't it? It's like a balloon, but as soft as a feather! Go on! You can play with it!
Boingie boingie boingie boingie! That's the sound I make in my head. Ahh? Ahh...yeah, you can dig your fingers in. Aaahh… yeah… head scritches are the beeest… when did my leg start bumping up and down? You think it's adorable? Aww… shucks...
Nuuu...don't get uuuuup! Don't go! I have some soda we could drink together and we could play games and we could talk and talk and talk into the night like you always do! You will? YAY! You're staying! Ooh! I always dreamed this would happen!
...Uh, what do you mean, 'what do you mean?' I just haven't thrown private parties for ponies in a while. And I just need to rejuvenate myself. That's all there is to it. Yeah. Of course there is. Noo other reason at aaalll.
Ahem. Here's your soda. I have an idea! Whoever finishes first gets to decide what to do next! Come on, let's do it!
Yes! You can do it! Twist off the top… hngghh… why do these bottles have to be so hard… to open?! Nnngh! HNNNNGGGHHH!
...Yeah, I could use a little help.
Ah, fingers! Just a quick little flip and the top is off! Between this and your head scritches earlier, I should write an ode to fingers. How do you think it should go? La la la la la la fingers, la la la la laaaa, fingeeers! They can do so many great things, I don't know the wooords to this! Ha ha ha ha ha! Just making stuff up on the spot is fun!
Ready? Let's chug 'em. Readysetgo!
And I'm done! Whoo! Half a second! A new record!
...Physics? What are those? Are they edible? Breakable? *gasp!* Maybe they're the laws of science!
Look, the fact is, I know the laws of science. I simply choose to ignore them.
Think of it this way. The universe proposes the rules. But it takes all of its resources to enforce them. So I don't have to follow them if I don't want to! I'm free! I'm a strong, independent mare who don't...need… no… stallion…
...Anyhoo, I get to decide the game. Let's play Truth or Dare!
I can see the fear in those eyes. We won't go… there, I assure you. Hee hee!
Okay. You go first. I was planning on having Spin the Bottle as well, but there are only two of us here, soo…it's kinda pointless, isn't it?
Hmm...I choose truth.
Was I always like this? Oh, ho ho hoo, no. I became like this after I discovered my true purpose. That was to make other ponies happy. Because seeing other ponies happy made me feel happy.
You feel that way too? Oh my gosh! You know how it's like, then! You always get this fluttering feeling when you've done something right. You feel proud. Like, 'I've done something right today, and I made another pony smile.' Right? Yes! Exactly!
The thing is, though...it's not always an easy job. Some days I feel really tired or angry or stressed. And I still tell myself to give off that cheerfulness to all the other ponies. All in all, it can be tough, being the funny friend. No one actually knows the kinds of stress it puts on ponies like me and you. After a long day of making other people feel un-alone, we come home and we go to bed… alone…
Aww, thank you! I'll always remember you too! We can be remembering buddies!
Okie-dokie-loki! My tuuurn! Um...truth or dare?
Truth? Okay. Um… what was the happiest time of your life?
*gasp!* When you came to Ponyville? Ohh, that's so sweet! I bet your run-in with us was a bit shocking, right?
Ha ha ha ha ha! You can say that again!
Okay, okay. My turn!
Umm...dare!
...Sit right next to you? That's a strange dare. Are you suuure that's all you want? Hmm?
Hm. Okay then! Boing!
Does it matter if I'm just sitting like this or leaning into your shoulder like this? You prefer it like this? Okie-dokie!
Truth or dare?
Truth again? Hmm… who did you leave behind when you came here?
Your mother? Ohh, maan, I know what that's like! I have a few sisters and a ma and pa back on the rock farm. I hated to leave them behind, but I had to in order to discover my true purpose. I couldn't do that on a rock farm!
Um, did you also leave behind a, um...a boyfriend, or a girlfriend, or…
No? Whew!
...I-I mean, you'll find someone someday!
...You already have your eye on somepony? Really? Who is it? I can keep a secret! Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!
My turn now? Aww, but I wanted you to tell me!... Dare.
Close my eyes? Okay!
This is sooo weird! I can see my eyelids! Hey, do you have a surprise? Like a pinata, or a-hmm!
...Mmm?
Mmm…
…*mwah*
...I-it's me?
The pony you've had an eye on, all this time, is...me?
...WAHOOOO! YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! I just want to zip around and bounce off the ceiling and jump off the walls and land in your lap! *gasp!* I'm in your lap!
UNGH! You're hugging me!...Really hard!...But I don't want you to stop! Hey! Gimme your face! I wanna kiss you too, you know!
Mmm…
…*mwah!*
...Yes, I liked you too, you silly poo! How can anyone not like this hot party-goer?! You're just so...illuminating! Whenever I'm around you, the colors seem a bit brighter and the music playing seems to touch me a bit more. My heart always beats faster when you smile at me. You inspire me to throw even bigger birthday bashes and parties! Why? Why? You ask why? It's because...well...You're just...the best!
I want to explore more of what makes you you. We can do it together! No one should feel alone! That's why I'm here!
Now we don't have to go to sleep alone any more! Every day, we can snuggle each other to sleep and wake up with us playing with each other's hair! I promise I'll do it. I promise you, I'll be the best party girl you've ever wanted. Cross my heart...hope to fly...stick a cupcake in my eye...Doesn't that sound super-awesome-erific?
Mmm…
…*mwah*
...I'll take that as a yes, then.