Hello, This is Not a Scammer, I Promise

by BronyWriter


Non-Canon Bonus Chapter: The Queen

It started when the phone rang.

I looked up from my desk and took my cellphone out of my hoodie pocket. I flicked it on and saw that I didn't recognize the number. I sighed and was about to put the phone down, but... eh, I figured that it might be a little important. I swiped the phone to answer and held it up to my ear with my shoulder as I returned to work.

"Hello?"

"Yes, hello, this is Legit Collector from the Equestrian Revenue service, and I am calling in regards to a recent lawsuit that has been brought up against you for failure to pay your income tax on time."

I rolled my eyes and uncapped my pen. I hated prank calls. "I don't have time for this, sir. I'd appreciate it if you didn't call me on this number again."

"Ma'am, I need you to listen to me very carefully. Our records show that you owe the ERS ten thousand, nine hundred and fifty-five bits and forty-two cents. Should--"

"I don't owe the IRS anything, sir, now if you could--"

"Ma'am, I must ask you to not interrupt me. Our records indicate that you have failed to pay your income tax for the years of two-thousand and fifteen to two-thousand and nineteen. If you do not resolve this matter, I will sign the warrant for your arrest, and we will seize all property, bank accounts, passports, and anything else we need to pay off your debt. Now, may I have your name, please?"

"It's Lauren Faust, now--"

"NOPE!"

SLAM!