One or the Other

by Blind Alley


Chapter 14 - A Broken Promise, and a Simple Question

I trudged out of Fluttershy's cottage feeling heavier than a ton of bricks.

“Stupid body growing stupid things I don't want. Stupid Pinkie Promise.”

I kicked a stray stone along the dirt road that lead back to town. I could have flown all the way home, but that would mean giving up kicking things and that was too high a price to pay until I really needed to dodge anypony seeing me. Of course Fluttershy wouldn't have a new binder waiting for me. Why would she? She wasn't running a store. I was lucky Fluttershy had agreed to help at all after I broke my promise to get a new binder when I outgrew the old ones. She'd been very quiet (even by her standards) all through the measuring. When she did say something, she'd almost been sharp with me about waiting so long to come back. The looks she'd given me…

“My my my, aren't you in sour mood today?”

I almost jumped out of my skin. The voice came from everywhere at once, echoing like the inside of Twilight's castle but without anything to echo off of. I recognized it quickly enough once the shock wore off. Of course HE would wait until after I was far enough from Fluttershy's place before he butted in. I hunched my shoulders and kept walking.

The voice chuckled. “What? No time to stop and chat to a dear and, frankly, amazing friend?”

I gritted my teeth and kept walking. “I'm not in the mood, Discord.”

A shrub beside the road rustled and burst into bloom, red, yellow, gray, and blue flowers sprouting in the rough shape of Discord's long face. “And here I came to offer my assistance. Why, if this is how you treat your friends, it's a wonder you managed to land yourself in this little love triangle.”

Blood rushed to my face and I whirled around to shout at him. “It is NOT a love triangle!”

Discord rolled his daisy eyes. “Would you prefer 'circle of affection'? 'Rhombus of passion'? 'Parabola of romance'?” I swatted at the flowers, tearing most of them off and scattering them to the wind.

“You've been spying on us!”

“Hardly,” Discord scoffed from a puddle that had no business being on the road when it hadn't rained all week. I stomped right to the edge of it and glared down into the impossible reflection of Discord's face within.

Discord looks weird. He's like a young stallion who's also really old, and I don't know how that works. He almost looks like he's in his late twenties or early thirties, except for the lines under his eyes, and the fact that his eyebrows and beard are snow white. At the same time, his short, slightly messy hair is all shiny black, not even any white streaks. His long ears sit a bit too low and never stand up evenly, and the weird blue horn and antler just make his face look even longer than it is. The red and yellow eyes are just creepy as far as I'm concerned, and his teeth? I don't know half of the things he gets his teeth from but I know for a fact that most of those things don't belong in the same mouth. Especially not the fang.

“Oh yeah? Then how would you know about a--” I gagged on the words, “love triangle?”

He leaned against the edge of the puddle and started filing his eagle talons with an ear of corn. “Well, there I was, disorganizing Twilight's library as my little way of saying 'I care', when I felt a magical disturbance over in Rarity's shop. Quite the disturbance indeed, and with Sweetie Belle's signature no less! Now, being the fantastic friend that I am, I was well aware of your little party this weekend, and so I popped on over to investigate--”

“Why?”

Discord wiped off his smirk off with a handkerchief and plastered on a wounded expression in its place, smoothing it on with the scaly, yellow fingers of his left hand before answering. “I assure you that I had nothing but the best of intentions! Sweetie Belle isn't the sort of pony to go around firing off combat spells on a whim. I assumed she was in danger.”

I folded my arms and scowled all the harder. “You never help out when anypony is in danger.”

Discord's mouth twisted into a crooked smile. “Don't I? It's not every trio of fillies that walks away from plunge after crash after fire without so much as a scrape, you know.”

Now that I thought about it, it did seem sort of lucky how much we got away with… I shook my head violently. Discord is a professional liar. He probably invented lying. Like, actually invented it.

“Why should I believe that?”

“Because it's rude to assume the worst of others,” he said airily. “Also, because in about five seconds,” a loud ticking started up from… somewhere? “…you're going to realize that you're missing the point.”

“The point is that you were spying on Sweetie and-- Wait, combat spell?” Something dinged. I dropped to my knees and plunged my hand into the puddle to grab at Discord's collar. I don't know how, but I actually got a hold of it and pulled his head up and out of the puddle so we were face to face.

“What happened!? Is she okay!? Tell me!”

Discord's renewed smile didn't so much as twitch. “Oh, merely a lovers spat. From what she was sobbing into Apple Bloom's shoulder, I'd say that somepony broke her heart. Powerful feelings do wonders for your magic, you know. She sent Apple Bloom halfway down the hallway with that one! Hoo-hoo~! The look on her face--!”

I yanked him in closer, glaring right into his weird, misty red pupils. “Not. Funny.”

Discord blew a tiny puff of air in my face that hit like a gale. I lost my grip on his collar and landed hard on my rump a half dozen steps away. He lifted himself part way out of the puddle, left elbow on the ground and chin resting on his yellow palm. As usual, he was wearing his mismatched brown coat that was like five different brown coats cut and stitched together. The left sleeve isn't even a sleeve, it's some kind of weird cape thing that drapes over the old-fashioned shirt he wears with the sleeve rolled up to show off his wiry, griffon-ish arm.

“You, my young, love-struck pegasus friend, are in trouble. Stuck not just between two mares, but your best friends. The very ponies you're bound to by that charmingly unusual trio of marks you share. Who to choose? Whose heart do you break?

“Shut up!”

Discord leaned in, grinning wider than ever. “Oh, but it's just too entertaining! I couldn't have come up with a better trap myself!”

I got to my feet and dusted myself off, glaring at him all the while. “What do you want, Discord?”

“Moi? I just want to ask you a question. That's all.” He held up a taunting finger that waggled its own taunting finger at me. “Just a single, simple question.”

I narrowed my eyes. Nothing is EVER simple with Discord. “What's the catch?”

“You have to listen.” I froze. Discord's voice, and face, had just gotten a lot more serious. “What I'm about to ask you is very important, and I'm quite certain that nopony else in this neat and tidy little town is going to ask it. You're in a tight spot and faced with a difficult choice. At least, that's what everypony is going to tell you. One… or the other. Sweetie Belle or Apple Bloom. My question for you is this--” A hand landed on my right shoulder just as his voice whispered into my ear, smooth as venomous silk.

“Why not both?

Before I answer, before I could even finish flinching, there was a flash of light, and then both of him were gone.


I got home about three hours after my run in with Discord, thanks to deciding to do a few dozen laps around the sky over Ponyville to try (and fail) to clear my head. The first thing I did was drag myself into the kitchen in search of anything in that sweet spot of actual food that doesn't need cooking. I settled for canned beets straight from the can and reminding myself that if I'd just kept my stupid problems to myself I'd be having actual food with my best friends instead of stabbing beets out of a can with a fork while trying to forget what Discord said.

Why not both?

Because it'd never work. Ever. It'd make me too happy. It would mean I didn't have to hurt anypony. An instant “get out of Tartarus free” card. A way to keep my friends with me, and get to be more than just friends them, and not have anypony left out? That was waaay too good to be true. Plus, Apple Bloom was still saying she doesn't like mares even after we almost went all the way past second base right there in the orchard. Sweetie was totally into mares but… I couldn't help but wonder if she would still be interested in me after the whole “running away” thing.

Oh, and everypony else would probably freak out about it. There's that, too.

I was just on my way back to my room to finish my “dinner” when I heard the worlds most feeble knock at my front door. If there had been so much as a bird chirping outside I wouldn't have heard it, which meant it basically had to be Fluttershy.

Back out of my room I went, setting my half-eaten can of beets on the kitchen counter along the way, before opening my inner door and going down the stairs to the outside door. My apartment is on the second floor of the house I live in, and the only way in (aside from the windows) is a closed-in staircase hugging the side of the house that goes straight up to the second floor. It's an addition or something that got built on years after the lower floor was built, and the owner rents it out. It's kinda small and I have to be quiet at night, but the rent is cheap.

When I unlocked the door, the expected yellow pegasus was waiting for me, in her flowing, peach colored blouse and pale green pants.

“Hey, Flutt--” She cut me off by thrusting the shopping bag she was carrying into my arms.

“I picked out a couple of choices for you with your new measurements to try on,” she said, sharply. “There's also another healing potion from Zecora to help with the pain and all the damage that you've done to yourself.” She turned on her heel and started to walk away.

I looked into the bag. The potion was there alright but-- “Hey, these are regular bras. I mean, regular sports bras. I asked for--”

“No.”

I looked up, Fluttershy was stopped still a few paces away, facing away from me. “But-- I can't go out in these! I need a--” I looked up and down the (thankfully empty) street and lowered my voice to a hiss, “a binder.”

“Buy one yourself.”

“Hey, I paid for these. I just needed you to--”

I said NO!

Everypony who knew Fluttershy long enough heard about “The Stare” sooner or later. Rainbow Dash told me about a time when she'd used it on a fully grown dragon and made him cry. When I was little I saw Fluttershy Stare down a cockatrice while being turned to stone. Sure, I also heard it didn't work on Discord but, come on, it's Discord. I'd never actually been on the business end of The Stare though.

Not until now.

Did you even THINK about what you were doing?

She'd been halfway to the road. She couldn't have gotten back to the door that fast. She just couldn't!

You promised me that you'd do it right this time! You promised me that you'd let me know when you needed a new one!

Her eyes bored into mine like drills. Fluttershy was only a tiny bit taller than me but I could swear she was towering over me like a dragon made of guilt.

You Pinkie Promised me and you BROKE that promise! I was trying to help you and you used me to keep hurting yourself. Did you even think about how that would make me feel!? I can't believe you could be so selfish! I have half a mind to tell Rainbow Dash about this!

My stomach turned to an icy pit of dread. “But I--”

But NOTHING, young lady! You came to me for help and I'm giving it, but I will NOT help you hurt yourself anymore! Now, what do you have to say for yourself!?

I could see myself reflected in her eyes. It was like seeing myself chained in the lowest depths of Tartarus, tormented by all my sins forever. Every broken promise, every cruel word and lie, every single mistake, all turned around and poured into my eyes.

Then it was gone.

“Scootaloo? Oh dear, did I--?”

I bolted.

I dropped the bag and I just ran. I took the stairs two at a time, skidded around the corner into my apartment, and sprinted into my bedroom like a pack of Timberwolves was at my heels. I slammed the door shut behind me and fumbled with the latch until it finally clicked. Then I wedged a chair under the knob. And pushed my dresser in front of it. It was just quick flap across the room to latch the window and draw the curtains, and then I dove onto my bed and pulled the sheet up over my head.

Discord had stood up to that!? Rainbow Dash was friends with THAT!? She was evil! She'd come straight from the depths of Tartarus! Her voice! Her eyes! Sweet Celestia, her eyes! I could still see them. I could still see them.

*Rap tap tap*

“Scootaloo?”

My blood temperature dove right down to forty below. She was outside my room. Why hadn't I locked the front door!?

“Um, are you, um, okay?”

I pulled my sheet tighter around my shivering body and went full fetal position. She couldn't get inside. I was safe. …Was that a sniffle?

“I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to use The Stare! It just happened! I really can't control it. Sometimes I just get so angry and it comes out and th-then--” My shivering calmed down. It was hard to believe that was the same voice from a minute ago. She sounded so frightened and upset, but not like angry upset. Like 'I accidentally hurt a puppy' upset. “Are you okay? Scootaloo?”

Slowly I sat up. “…Yeah?” I called back. Celestia, I sounded like a scared little filly!

“Oh thank goodness! I'm so sorry about that. Um, I mean, I am upset with you, but I didn't mean to use The Stare.”

“That was an accident?” I said weakly. “What the hay happens if you mean to do it?”

“Actually, it, um, doesn't work as well.” We were both quiet for a moment before Fluttershy went on. “Are you okay? It's just… you seemed a little down before, now that I think about it.”

I hugged my knees to my chest and winced at the pain that set off. “I'm okay.”

“Are you sure? If you need to talk about anything...”

I sighed. She wasn't gonna give up unless I told her something. Fluttershy is just too darn nice to leave somepony alone if they were hurting. When she's not being crazy, anyway.

“I had a fight with my friends. We already started patching things up though, so you don't have to worry. Just a few things to work out, you know? We're talking tomorrow.”

“Oh dear. I know you girls fight a lot but you've always been so close.”

I stifled a snort. She had noooo idea. “It's cool. We're still friends. You can just leave that bag wherever it is. I'll grab it later.”

“Oh! Yes, of course. Well… if you change your mind about talking, you know where to find me, okay?”

“Yeah, sure.” I bit my lip a little when I heard the floorboard outside creak a little. She's a good listener. Maybe she'd know what I should do? “Hey, Fluttershy!”

The board creaked again. “Yes?” she called hopefully.

“Er--” And, just like that, I chickened out. “Uh-- Sorry I lied to you!” I cringed. Sure, it was true but what if I'd just reminded her of how angry I'd made her?

“I forgive you.”

“Wait, seriously?”

“Of course!” Her voice was all rainbows and butterflies like she hadn't just chewed me out three minutes ago. “As long as you're sorry and understand why what you did was wrong, why wouldn't I forgive you? You're not a bad pony, Scootaloo, you just made a bad choice. I'm, um, still not buying you a binder, though.”

“Okay, I get it, I'll buy it on my own.”

I heard her shuffle around a little outside but she didn't push it. “I, um, guess I'll be going now. Don't forget the potion. It's the same as last time. Zecora suggested letting it work overnight, okay?”

“Sure. Thanks, Fluttershy.”

The board creaked again. A few tense moments later I heard the front door shut. I breathed a heavy sigh of relief and slumped over double.

“Ugh, that could have gone better.”