//------------------------------//
// Chapter 17: Not so secret anymore 
// Story: Borderlands 2 DLC: Vault of the Consular 
// by NightStream 
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It had been a few days since they had initially left for the Crystal Empire and for the vault hunters that were on the friendship express right now, they were glad to finally be back. Originally, they thought that they could be able to just easily go to the empire and come back. But there were a few delays in between that made such a possibility non-existent. The first was the transformation that Mordecai had gone through, turning him into a griffon instead of the original pegasus body that he had. There wasn’t a reason for them to try and be racing back if the hunter was going to trip every few moments while trying to adjust to the fact that he had claws and paws instead of hooves now.

The second was that the day after Mordecai transformed, a powerful blizzard raged through the empire. Freezing the train tracks over and making it impossible for the train to go anywhere unless the tracks had de-thawed first. In order for that to happen, the ice on the tracks needed to melt naturally. Magic or elemental guns couldn’t be used because there was concern that the overwhelming amount of heat could melt the tracks in its entirety. And the last thing that they would’ve wanted was a derailed train filled with passengers inside.

Eventually though, the ice on the tracks did melt off and they were able to head back. By that time though, they had already been in the empire for a few days and coming back to Ponyville was supposed to be a welcoming sight after being away for so long.

Unfortunately, the first thing that they saw upon coming back was Tina flying in the air… with Rainbow Dash and a dragon that strangely looked a lot like Axton as the train pulled into the station. Followed by hearing Tina shout as they stepped out. “Woohoo!! Badass of the skies, bitches!!!”

That just lead to everypony, including Twilight, Starlight and Spike, to just stare at what was going on in the sky for a full minute or so… before somepony actually decided to speak. That pony being Roland. “... What the hell did we miss?”

“Honestly, I’m not sure… and I’m not sure if I want to know,” Twilight then responded, before noticing somepony else not that far as they left the station. “Oh hey, there’s Gaige.”

At that, the unicorn Mechromancer that was Gaige turned around at the sound of Twilight’s voice, letting out a sigh of relief. “There you guys are. Bucking finally… Lilith was getting worried about you guys. What took you so long to get back?”

“Bad blizzard that froze over the tracks.” Spike simply explained.

“... Couldn’t you just-”

“We already asked, however, we couldn’t. There were concerns that we might melt the tracks if we used a fire weapon or magic to melt the ice, so we just had to wait it out.” Twilight then added on, just as Mordecai and Zer0 joined up with them. “So… could you help explain… well…” She then looked up to the sky, pointing at where Tina and Rainbow were right now. “This?”

“Well, believe it or not, the dragon up there is actually Axton,” The mechromancer first pointed out to them. “Discord came by and told us of the glitches that happened with Mordecai, so he took all the bands back. When he took Axton’s forcefully,” She paused, just before letting out a sigh. “He turned into a dragon.”

“Hunh…” Maya then thought to herself. “I guess that doesn’t sound too bad-”

“Tina sees him as her version of Spike.” That statement alone had the pupils on both the princess of friendship and the dragon immediately shrink.

Seeing this point in the conversation, that was when Roland himself tried to change the subject a bit. “I hope Lilith is taking this well, I really hope she is.”

That… didn’t quite get the kind of reaction that he wanted to see from the Mechromancer though as she looked off to the side and grit her teeth. “Could you define what you mean by ‘well’?”

“…… Oh no…”

“Come on now, it’s Lilith… it can’t exactly be that bad, right?” Mordecai now spoke up, just as the group began to walk back towards Twilight’s castle. The hunter was trying to think a bit optimistically, considering the fact that Lilith had done a lot of things that some people would see as ‘bad’ for a good reason. Such as being the firehawk in Frostburn Canyon.

Yet, what the Mechromancer had to tell them came nowhere close to what he was thinking about. “Oh I don’t know. Would you call ‘liquifying’ the fur and mane off of somepony’s head bad? One stallion is now in the hospital after they tried to hit on her earlier in the week. The same hospital where Tina accidentally used the royal canterlot voice and scared the crap out of everypony inside by screaming ‘burn all the babies’. And the worst part about it was that this happened nearby the hospital’s maternity ward.”

Nopony said anything. They just stared at Gaige with the same shocked expression. The expression you would have on your face if you witnessed someone kick a puppy in front of a little girl. All before Roland let out a breath and finally decided to speak. “I think it's time to stop this from getting worse.”

“Yeah, we might’ve needed that sometime ago.” Gaige then sighed, just as they all finally reached the door to the castle and trotted inside. As everypony was coming through the door, that was when the mechromancer made an announcement. “Hey Lilith! Guess who just got back?”

Not a few seconds later did Lilith teleport directly into the center of the castle as she looked back at all four of the vault hunters that just came back as well as Twilight, Starlight and Spike. Mostly though, her focus was on Vault Hunters. “What the hell took you guys so long? If it weren’t for the note that Spike burned yesterday saying that you guys were okay, I would think that you were dead.”

“Blizzard kept us locked in, froze the tracks, couldn’t really use our guns or magic because there was concerns where the tracks would melt and cause the train to derail faster than the one Jack sabotaged when first arriving in Pandora,” Maya now spoke up as the fellow siren noticed the vault key piece that was stuck to her now. “Mordecai’s a griffon, I threw a guard captain through a door, what else is there to talk about-?”

“Woah woah woah, you threw the captain of the guard through a door?” Gaige then spoke up. “Isn’t he like Twilight’s brother or something?”

“Yes…” Twilight herself now deadpanned. “Though, how did you know? You haven’t even met him-”

“We kind of wanted to know a bit more about Cadance and Rainbow told us about how she’s married to the captain of the guard. One thing led to another and now she’s trying to teach Tina how to fly without diving straight forward like a rocket.” The mechromancer shrugged. It was at that moment that Zer0 excused himself, saying that he had to ‘clear his mind’ for a moment as he went out the back of the castle.

“Well… we were going to ask ‘how was everypony’ while we were gone,” Starlight now let out a breath as she walked over to the cutie map and took a seat on the chair with Rarity’s cutie mark. “But I think Gaige already informed us about that.”

Lilith turned to the mechromancer, narrowing her eyes for a moment. “What did you tell them?”

“Just a basic rundown. Tina’s antics, you liquifying the fur and mane on a dude’s head, Axton turning into a dragon, Tina seeing Axton as her version of Spike and flying lessons for the two of them,” The mechromancer explained fully. “Why, did I miss anything?” That only caused the siren to shake her head from side to side, before looking past Twilight as everypony else began to get themselves settled in.

“Um, Twilight… I think somepony is here to see you,” she said, nodding her head in the direction of the castle entrance. While Maya, Roland and a few of the others began to finally get some rest after their long trip back from the north, Twilight herself turned around to see an oddly familiar pony at the door. It was a male pegasus with an orange fur coat with a dark blue mane and tail as well as a cutie mark with a shield that had a lightning bolt on the front. Behind him, he looked to be carrying a couple of bags with him as the alicorn trotted to the door and setting one of them down had the sound of metal plates hitting each other.

All of which, made somepony… or in this case, somebirdy a bit curious. “Hey Spike. Any idea who the new guy is?”

Spike, who had just started eating a ruby and was in the process of chewing it, swallowed what he had in his mouth before looking back at Mordecai, who was sitting with Maya and Roland at the Cutie Map with Starlight. “Him? I… think we’ve met before once. Can’t quite remember his name though.”

“Maybe he’s part of the royal guard?” The siren sitting at the table guessed. “It did sound like he had armor in one of his bags. What do you think Roland?”

Roland thought for a second before answering. “I think we saw him in the Crystal Empire while we were there, maybe as one of the guards or something like that.” He then put a hoof to his chin, while being weirded out for a second at the feeling of it. “Though we never did get his name.”  He then decided to go over and introduce himself.

“Hey there, might seem a little weird to ask this but did we meet in the Crystal Empire by any chance?”

“Uh… N-no,” The stallion shook his head. “I was in Canterlot up until today when the c-captain transferred me… I’m sorry, but who are you?”

“Ah my bad then, thought I saw you before.” Roland then cleared his throat. “Anyway my name is Roland, and you?” 

“F-flash Sentry,” The pegasus nervously replied back, before pulling out some papers and giving them to Princess Twilight. “These are my proof of transfer papers, Princess. I have my equipment here in case-”

Before he could finish, that was when they heard what sounded like a loud shout… and turned to realized that Tina was flying straight at them. “WOOHOO!!! INCOMING TACKLE!!” 

Twilight just stared with wide eyes, before using her magic to teleport most of the things that were at the front door further inside. Unfortunately though, Flash was not included in this given that just as she cast it, Tina’s downward tackle made impact with his chest and knocked him into the ground. Kicking up some of the documents that he was holding onto. “That was so BADASS!! I wanna do it again!!!”

“ROLAND, MOVE!!” Axton shouted as he came in for a landing, to which the soldier quickly got out of the way. However Axton’s momentum caused him to go skidding along the floor and ending up in the pile with Flash and Tina. He then got up with Tina sitting on his shoulder and both of them had their arms up in the air.

“THAT WAS AWESOME!!!”

“And this is why doing rapid descents is a bad idea,” Everypony now heard Rainbow Dash as she slowly touched down on the ground. “Oh hi, Twilight. When did you guys get back here?”

“Just now…” She let out a deep sigh. “We were catching up on what’s happening and trying to get things back to normal before Tina and Axton crashed through here. Lilith told us you were trying to teach them how to fly?”

“Yeah, that’s right. However, they seem to be more interested in how fast they can go rather than controlling that speed and learning when to slow down,” The pegasus told them, just as Flash was getting up from being steamrolled by the deadly combination of Tina and Axton. “So… new guy?”

“Yeah, that’s Flash,” Twilight then replied, nodding her head as Flash soon looked back at the two of them. “Just got transferred here from Canterlot by the Royal Guard. Flash, this is my friend Rainbow.”

“H-hello there.” Flash himself now replied, scratching the back of his head with a wing. “Sorry… things have been strange for me ever since I got here.”

“Give it time. You’ll try to get used to it,” Rainbow shrugged, before looking around as Twilight was picking up some of the papers and giving them back to him. “So, what’s with all the papers?”

“Oh, well, you know… transfer papers, list of equipment I brought with me, you know…”

“Important stuff?”

“Pretty much,” Yet, as Flash soon opened up the folder, he realized that there was one thing that was missing. Something that made his eyes widen upon realization. “Um… did any of you see a packet of papers that had a binding clip on the top-?”

Of course, as he said that, that’s when they heard Gaige start laughing… as well as Flash’s worst fears began to take form right in front of him. “Haha! Oh my god, guys! You’re not going to believe this!!”

“Gonna say this now, sorry for crashing into you.” Axton said as he walked past Flash, still with Tina on his shoulder. “So Gaige, what's got you laughing so much?” As he said that, Gaige showed him the front page of what she was reading?

“‘Things the Royal Guard are not allowed to do around the Vault Hunters’... I gotta see this now.” Axton said with a grin on his face.

“Wait, something like this exists? Since when?” Spike now asked.

“Since it was written by… Oh god, Twilight,” Gaige said, before looking to the alicorn. “Your brother wrote this! That’s just GOLD!!” All that did was make Flash wish that he was in any other place right now and not have to go through what was happening in this very moment.

“Oh this is gonna be good.” Axton said as he let out a small chuckle just thinking about what’s on it. “So let’s see where this begins.”

“Well, for one thing… a lot of these ones refer to you,” That comment had the chuckle that was on his face immediately disappear as Twilight and a few others began to back up and away from the commando. “Listen to this one… ‘While it is true that the vault hunters named Roland and Axton both have backgrounds and experience when it comes to military tactics, this does not mean that they are seen as high ranking members of the Royal Guard. This rule applies further to Axton. Telling him that he’s ‘in charge’ of his own division of the Royal Guard would be just as bad as telling Prince Blueblood the concept of diplomatic immunity’.”

“....Really, even I know that would be a bad idea having me lead, I mean sure I know what to do in tactics but I mostly just do my own thing.” Axton commented with a raised eyebrow.

Just from that alone, Twilight felt like she was going to be sick just from the sounds of that. For Rainbow though, “Yeah, I can see that. Blueblood’s a complete and arrogant jerk.”

“And this is only a subsection,” Gaige added. “The entire second rule on the list is that we all have our own abilities along with the caption ‘provoke at your own risk’.”

“Heh… I think Shining learned that the hard way,” Maya snickered.

“Well, at least we’re all still trying to give good impressions, right?” Mordecai then asked, just before she noticed Gaige point out something to Twilight.

“You want me to read one of them…? Okay then,” The princess let out a deep breath, before flipping through a couple of pages and then finding a section of the document that she wanted to read. “Here goes, number 14 ‘The phrase ‘anything the vault hunters can do, I can do better’ is not a valid excuse for violating protocol for any reason. Any attempts to prove otherwise will be punished accordingly’,” Her eyes moved further down the page and then after that, she found two more pieces. “‘The phrase ‘Axton inspired me to do it’ does not count either. Nor does ‘Tannis requested data for an experiment’ count, considering the implications’.”

“Yeah, I can probably see why they would put that in there.” Maya added. “Though, in all fairness, are they just doing comparisons to Axton throughout the whole thing?”

“Actually, no.”

“Well, that’s good-”

“There looks to be a couple on you and Lilith though,” Twilight’s follow up response led to both sirens exchanging glances with each other, before asking a new question.

“Should I even ask what they say?”

“Well…” The alicorn flipped back to the front of the document, before looking back to both of them. “There’s a section for both of you under the rule of ‘provoke at your own risk’. For Maya, it says that you should not get in a fight with her under any circumstances and for Lilith…” As Twilight read it, her pupils began to shrink. Almost as if she couldn’t not believe what she was reading.

“Uh… Twilight?”

“Give me that,” Rainbow now spoke, swiping the document away from Twilight as she began to read. “‘Furthermore, if you so happen to be deployed at a location where a siren is present, do not try anything that would make them feel uncomfortable or annoyed, especially Lilith. She is known as the ‘Firehawk’ where she’s from for a reason and Colonel Smores is still in Ponyville Hospital undergoing burn treatment with the fur on his face and his mane all but gone after he tried ‘wooing’ her over‘.”

Now it was Lilith’s pupils that began to shrink, mostly because she was realizing that the stallion she sent to the hospital was not just some random stallion, but a soldier in the royal guard. “Oh sh*t, he was in the guard!?”

“I mean… he did kinda deserve it.” Axton said. “I mean you were giving clear signs to him to back off.”

“I thought he was some guy who couldn’t take a hint, not an off duty guard officer! I mean, isn’t that considered assault?”

“Lilith, if I’m to be honest, we done far worse compared to that. I highly doubt this is gonna be a problem.”

“So yeah, all things considered, you will be fine.” Axton said to try and calm her down. “Anyway, what else is there about me?”

“Well, one says that Royal Guard personnel are not going to be equipped with ‘guns that shoot swords’ and that they are not allowed to come to you to get one.” Rainbow then told him. “It also mentions that your title is not ‘overall badass’ or ‘the great commandy one’. Not to mention a reminder saying that the royal guard is an army in service to the crown, not a crazed cult… and you were not exactly thrilled by that.”

“Should I-?”

“It looks like Axton had written something in protest, but that was crossed out and a note was written. Saying that none of the Vault Hunters are allowed to make any changes to this document or critique it,” Rainbow added, pointing out the section she was talking about to the vault hunters in question. Including Axton, who did not entirely look too fond of that.

“Ok first, for the gun I would only say that as a joke because that would only do more harm than good.”  Axton then let out a huff, while accidentally breathing a short burst of fire. “Also why the hell would I ever want to be called the ‘Great Commandy One’, I am nowhere near that self-centered.”  He was also ignoring some looks thrown his way. “And also why aren’t we allowed to make some changes or at least suggestions when they are making this list, well rules?”

At that Roland let out a sigh. “Axton, this is the Equestrians we are talking about. I don’t think we should give them suggestions in case if this gets way out of hand.” the Commando was about to respond, until Roland just gave him a look. 

“To be fair, the stuff on here for Tina is just as bad,” Gaige commented. “It even says here that the other guards are to stop telling the new recruits that surviving an encounter with Tina is not a rite of passage.”

“How is that even a rite of passage to begin with?”

“You mean you don’t see her overall nature as unpredictable?” Rainbow asked. “This is the same pony who decided that the best way to go into sugarcube corner is to crash through the roof.”

“Wait, that happened?” All that did was have Rainbow nod her head as Gaige looked back at the document. “Hunh… in that case, some of these other ones seem justified.”

“Like?” Lilith now asked.

“Number 3, section c. ‘The motion that Tiny Tina could ignore any rules that are in place (whether they be laws of Equestria or Lilith telling her something) because of her reason being ‘I’M ROYALTY, BITCHES!!’ is unanimously rejected. Please prevent her from doing anything that would cause a scene while still maintaining protocol’.”

“Oh COME ON!! Why am I the only one out!?” Tina herself now complained. “Sparklebutt, Sunbutt, Moonbutt and Lovabutt are just like me!! How am I different!?!”

Now all Gaige did was just stare at Tina, the same way that Roland stared at Axton earlier. “…… Do you really want for me to answer that?”

“Are there any others?” Maya now asked.

“Something here about a list of things that she isn’t, despite her claims… don’t leave her unsupervised… please leave socializing for off duty after something here regarding Fleur De Lis fainting after hearing a recruits best Ork impression?” Rainbow said, the last part coming off more like a question than anything else before turning her attention back to the list. “And lastly, the notion from Tina saying that Krieg can be sated with warm cookies, milk, tickling his pecs and a bedtime story is right out… Why would someone even think that would work in the first place?”

“You do realize this is Tina we’re talking about, right?”

“… Fair point.”

“Gotta say, they at least have some idea of what the guards shouldn’t do around us.” Axton said with a little laugh. “I mean, what next some of them want to judge a killing contest between us.”

That just had Gaige look back at Rainbow, before the two of them chuckled. “Actually, that’s number 23.”

That now had Mordecai speak up now as he noticed Brick come in from another side of the room. “You’re kidding right?”

“Nope,” The pegasus said, before handing it off for Gaige to read now. “Number 23, ‘None of you are to stand by as judges of any ‘killing contests’ between any of the vault hunters.’ Section A, ‘Especially Axton and Brick. We don’t want a repeat of what happened in Manehattan’. Section B, ‘Even more so for competitions between Lilith and Maya since those are even worse. Please don’t let that happen.’ And the last one, Section C, ‘Furthermore, all royal guard members are NOT allowed to bet on said killing contests. If caught, all your winnings will be confiscated go back into the royal treasury’.”

“WAIT, MANEHATTAN WAS A CONTEST?!?!?! WHO WON?” Brick announced shortly after hearing that.

“IT WAS?!!?” Axton also commented

All that did was have most ponies look at one another in confusion, with Flash just looking back at Twilight. “With all due respect, I think that last one was how they classified it. It probably might come off better than massacre or mass murder.”

“I think you might be right, all things considered.” The alicorn soon mentioned afterwards. “Anything else that stands out in that?”

“Well, there is a full two pages dedicated to Tannis,” Gaige commented. “I think that speaks for itself.”

“Yeah… they even had a note saying to not take up Tannis on her ‘standing offer’ since they’re trying to be professional.” Maya added.

“I really hope no one takes her up on it, I don’t think they would be able to handle themselves mentally afterward.” Axton said with a shudder at the implications of it. 

“Ok, I get that maybe that is better than calling it a massacre, but next time I need to know ahead of time if there is a contest going on.” Brick said as well.

“Mind if I read a couple?” Lilith now asked, just as Gaige used her magic to hand the document over to the siren so she could have a look. “Hmm… There’s a section here on Mr. Torgue… ‘Don’t ask Mr. Torgue for any advice in regards to handling a situation that might be out of control. It’s more than likely that his only solution involves explosions… or bigger explosions… or even MORE explosions. Seriously, he has said that his favorite color is explosions. I think we can get the picture that his solutions would lead to the creation of another badlands.”

“Yeah, that probably might not be good.” Rainbow said in agreement.

“The only other one that stands out is this one… ‘Under no circumstances is anypony to refer to Tartarus as the ‘friendship gulag’. Back from where they’re from, that name means something completely different’.”

That had the Mechromancer let out a deep sigh, before looking back at Lilith. “Oh yeah, I can definitely see a reason for that one.”

“I hope they are careful with that saying then, otherwise there might be a few ‘mishaps’ with them.” Axton said in a flat tone.

“Should I… even ask?” Starlight now spoke up as she leaned forward from her position at the cutie map.

“The Friendship Gulag was an actual place back on Pandora. A prison built by Hyperion to store and execute bandits and so called criminals. It’s a place where they can lock you up and murder you under the legitimate reason that you’re ‘bandit scum’.” Everyone turned around in the room to look directly at Mordecai, mostly because they did not expect to hear that from him of all people. “What? I had to help the vault hunters one time when they actually had to break into the damn place.”

“Damn, I didn’t think you would be the one to say that Mordecai. Which is what everyone is most likely thinking honestly.” Roland told the hunter.

“Hey, who better to say it than someone who knows a thing or two about it?” Mordecai said, before looking back at Lilith. “Mind if I take a crack at it?” With a nod, the siren handed over the papers to the hunter, who began to take a look at it before noticing a couple of things that stood out to him. “Hey, they mentioned a couple of things about Brick in here.”

“Really? What do they say about me? I hope it is something good about me.” Brick remarked, with a smile to himself.

“Let’s see… ‘Brick is known for always going with the ‘hooves on’ approach for solving problems. So if his first instinct to solve something is punching it, you might want to back up first’... ‘don’t call his dress shirt ‘tacky’ under any circumstances. It’s for your own good’... ‘In addition, please don’t joke around and say that he is ‘dumb as a brick’. At that point, you’re just asking for trouble’... and finally, ‘Don’t use any ‘figures of speech’ around Brick. He’ll just end up taking what you say literally’.”

“Ok, some very good points and some I agree with… but seriously, did they have to go for the dumb as a brick?” Brick commented, with a frown.

“My best guess is that they’re trying to warn them so that they can keep their men in one piece and not toasted like that Smores guy.” Mordecai chuckled, which lead to Lilith rolling her eyes.

“Fair enough, wouldn’t want any accidents with them around me would we?” Brick said with a chuckle as well.

“Ooh! Ooh!! Are there any more about me!? Are there, Mordy!?” Tina now asked as she had herself appear on Brick’s shoulders out of nowhere.

“Well, there is some… but it’s mostly to try and get the guard to not try anything… listen here,” Mordecai now began to read. “‘The notion that you are to drag other recruits into one of Tiny Tina’s tea parties just because Tina tells them ‘You are cordially invited, BITCH!!’ has been rejected for the foreseeable future’... Another section had ‘Tiny Tina, the Cutie Mark crusader’ crossed out on a list of codes that the guard don’t have for certain situations, followed by another explanation.”

“Which is?” Spike now asked out of curiosity.

“‘After several eyewitnesses in Ponyville seen Tiny Tina go on recent adventures with the Cutie Mark Crusaders, any activity where the four of them are part of something is to be treated as a Code Orange,’” The hunter now explained, shortly before reading the follow up piece. “‘Matter of fact, considering Tina’s unpredictable nature, always air on the side of caution when it comes to her. And if she comes by your door, have some chocolate chip cookies on hand just in case. Anything else might cause a Code Orange to become a Code Red.’”

“That… doesn’t sound so bad?” Spike said, trying to not sound like he didn’t know what he was talking about. That was… until Gaige said something else.

“It mentioned earlier how Tina saw the existence of raisins as a war crime-”

“RAISINS!?! WHERE!!? THOSE BLOODY ABOMINATIONS DO NOT DESERVE TO EXIST HERE!!! NOT IN THIS MAGICAL KINGDOM!!!”

That alone had the entire room go quiet… shortly before the purple dragon now decided to finish what he was saying. “I think that answered pretty much every other question I had.”

“Yeah, don’t even try to coax or trick her into eating them… it will not end well for you at all.” Roland said in assurance. “Especially cookies, just don’t.”  

“It also mentions not to trick her into eating them by saying they’re dehydrated grapes.”

“THEY ARE?!”

“Aw damn, I just made things worse…” Gaige groaned.

“Nice going there.” Axton just said while shaking his head.

“Screw you too.”

“Okay, so before this goes any further south than it already has, what else is on that list?”

Mordecai scanned through it one last time, before just simply shrugging. “Not really a lot that would come to mind, but perhaps we should redirect our attention to something else,” He said, pointing at Maya’s vault key piece with a talon. “We got three pieces of the key so far. Have any of you guys found out where the others could possibly be?”

“Well we know the locations of two of them at least.” Axton began as he then leaned against the wall. “One of them is in the Griffon Kingdom to the north and the other is in the Dragon Lands. So I think it will be obvious I will be going to the Dragon lands given my current appearance, while you will be going to the Griffin Kingdom.”  He then let out a sigh. “Also, considering the relations between ponies and Dragons are relatively new things are going to be a little weird at first. It just all depends who is going to come with me when we leave.” 

“Okay, but since you already have a piece, who are you taking that doesn’t have one?” Lilith then asked.

“Maybe-”

“MY TURN TO THE SLAUGHTER!!!” Every creature in the room froze at the sound of that voice as he entered the castle. Especially since would be considered as the first time that Flash met this particular vault hunter face to face.

“Well… I guess Krieg wants a turn then,” Maya let out a sigh. “I feel like I can’t exactly catch a break now.”

“W-what do you mean by that?” Starlight now asked as the psycho pony was getting in her personal space. Her fur standing up on end at the sound of Krieg’s deep breathing so close to her ears.

“It seems that whenever I’m around, he always seems to have a tendency to listen to me more than anybody else,” The siren soon explained. “Anytime he’s with another vault hunter aside from me, it always ends up with Krieg charging in and causing a bloody rampage with his buzz axe in hand. That and… well, he kind of saved my life once-”

“KILLING TIME IS FUN TIME, PRETTY LADY!!!” Krieg shouted, which in turn startled Starlight to the point that she fell off her seat and landed on the floor.

Flash himself, was bewildered by everything. But there was one thing that he couldn’t exactly make sense of inside his head. “Wait… this pony here… saved you once?”

“It kind of happened when we first ran into each other,” Maya let out a breath as she began to recall everything. “I was waiting for the train that would inevitably get sabotaged by Jack and while I was waiting, I encountered Krieg. At first, I thought he was just another hostile psycho considering that the first thing he was screaming was a bunch of nonsense… Of course, that was when I realized he was trying to tell me about a group of rats that tried to get the jump on me.”

“Rats?” Spike then asked. “Like the rodents?”

“No, these are different,” Gaige now interjected. “Of course, even though their behaviors similar, the rats we’re familiar with are different. They’re a specific kind of cannibalistic bandit that once lived in toxic mines and tunnels.”

“And unlike the usual bandits that inhabit the wastes, Rats usually lurk about in urban areas. Like the tunnels around a train station,” Maya picked the conversation back up after the Mechromancer. “Back to my first encounter with Krieg, a group of rats attempted to get the jump on me, but it wasn’t until Krieg threw his buzzaxe at one that I realized he was trying to warn me about them. Long story short, he helped me, I helped him. He hitched a ride on the same train I was on and I think most of you might understand everything after that.” 

“Okay, that makes sense,” Mordecai commented, shortly before bringing up something new. “But would it really be wise to have Krieg go. I mean… don’t get me wrong, we need the key piece, but wouldn’t Krieg just try to pick a fight with any-?”

“HERE THERE BE DRAGONS!!!” Krieg declared in a triumphant pose and holding Spike in one of his forelegs. Even though he was in his equine form, the stance that he took almost perfectly replicated that of an adventurer in bunkers and badasses.

Which, only lead to Twilight letting out a deep breath. “Okay, even I can’t quite seem to understand where that part came from.”

“You get used to it, Sparklebutt.” Tina proclaimed, jumping onto her back and hugging Twilight while she was still standing.

“That doesn’t make it any better!”

“Well I for one am not against it all things considered, he could use the time outside.” Axton smirked as he then turned to look at Maya. “So then Maya, want to come with me and Krieg or do you trust me to be alone with him and whoever else is coming?”

“I’ll come, but only so that I can be able to make sure you two don’t do anything stupid,” She told him. “Somepony else should come too though. Probably somepony who knows the leader of the dragons.”

“Um… I know her.” They all turned to see Spike trying his best to free himself from Krieg’s grip

“Really? How did you meet her?” Axton asked as he was trying to figure out how to help Spike without Krieg just simply throwing the dragon on the ground.

“Long while back, the last dragon lord named Torch called for all the dragons in Equestria to participate in an event called the gauntlet of fire after he decided to step down. After a bunch of numerous obstacles, I helped his daughter, Ember, become his successor,” Spike explained. “Since then, we’ve been trying to work out relations between dragon and ponykind, but the last time I saw her was a few months ago.”

“Well I guess it’s time to say hello again. See how she’s been and also find out where the key piece is.” 

Twilight let out a sigh as she looked back at the commando. “If only things were that simple.”

“Care to explain a bit on that now, Twilight?” Gaige asked.

“Well, the last two times you were out, there was a midget ‘killing contest’ and a god-liath on the loose and those varkid things… If you include what we saw at the gala when we first met Roland, I say that’s a recurring trend.”

“Well I mean…. Sh*t happens?” Axton said with a shrug and a weak smile. 

“That’s not an excuse.” Starlight now spoke up. 

“Fair enough, but I don’t know how to explain all of the things coming here to Equestria from Pandora. All we can do is just go with the ride and try not to die.” 

“We don’t know all the things that happened in Equestria and yet, we try to explain it,” Rainbow replied back. “Heck, before becoming Twilight’s student, Starlight was a supposed cult leader who almost tried breaking the timeline.”

That comment alone just had Starlight sink down in her chair. “Dash, I thought I told you that I wanted to move on from that. Why are you bringing it up now.”

“Well… to take a page from Axton, sh*t happens… right?” Dash shrugged her shoulders, just as Twilight face hooved herself and the mechromancer in the room looked back at the commando.

“Well, so much for being a role model.”

“Hey, I can’t help it if someone looks up to me, or says something I say.” Axton replied with a shrug. “I mean, I say some good stuff from time to time.”

“You refer to your turrets as your girlfriends.” Maya deadpanned.

“.... That has nothing to do with what’s happening right now.”  Axton quickly responded.

“And it makes your previous comment irrelevant.”

“Axton, just stop before you dig your grave even further alright?” Roland spoke in the Commando’s defense, to which he just let out a huff and nodded. Gaige himself just whispered something to Rainbow Dash, which got the pegasus giggling to herself for a moment. Yet, before he could say anything, that was when Maya decided to interject.

“So right now, we got Krieg, Axton, Spike and myself going to the Dragon Lands. You think we need anybody else?”

“I think that would be a good eno-”

“I HAVE A GREAT IDEA!!” Brick exclaimed, interrupting Roland. “How about its us four orginal Vault Hunters and Salvador go to this Griffin Kingdom whatever its called.” Brick then got a huge smile on his face. “You know, be like old times again… well with one extra of course. What do you guys think?”

Roland thought about it for a minute, before nodding his head.

“Honestly, that doesn’t sound so bad. Mordecai, Lilith what about you two?” He then asked the Hunter and Siren.

“I’m down for that. Just gotta get Talon from Fluttershy and I’ll be good.”

“I’m game for that.” Lilith added on.

“Sounds like a plan then, now we just need to let Salvador know and then we can get ready for whenever we leave.” 

“ROAD TRIP!!!” Krieg declared, throwing his forelegs into the air in a triumphant manner once again.

“Well I will take Spike here and tell Salvador, See ya.” Axton said as he flew by Krieg and quickly grabbed Spike and got out of the castle.

Once Axton was out of the Castle, Roland just looked at Gaige. “Ok what did you say about Axton, I’m kinda curious?”

“Oh I told Rainbow that it was more likely that his ex was digging his own grave instead of him right now.” The mechromancer snickered.

“I-I see.” Roland was trying his hardest not to let out a laugh, though it was clear he was failing. 

As the Vault Hunters walked out, preparing to get themselves ready for where they were off to next, Flash Sentry just stared. All he could honestly think of was one thing as he looked back to Twilight. “Um, princess…?”

“Yes, Flash?”

“How exactly am I support to report everything that just happened?”

All Twilight could really do was give the pegasus an honest shrug. “I’m not entirely sure. If anything, I’m trying to think of a letter to write to Princess Ember and the leader of the griffons to let them know that they’ll be having some guests coming… Celestia help them.”