//------------------------------// // Session 94 // Story: Ponies and Dragons (Just Have Fun) // by Alex Warlorn //------------------------------// Session 94.0 Unown3 https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Literature/MakeYourOwnMagicTheStarswirlDoOver https://mlp.fandom.com/wiki/Chapter_books#Make_Your_Own_Magic:_Starswirl_Do-Over Sunset Shimmer was wearing a blanket, shaking, drinking hot coco, in her pony form, in Pruncess Twilight's castle, sitting in a plush chair. "So due to yet another forgotten magic artifact, The Twirler, an ancient Equestrian device (yes yes, I got ANOTHER angry letter from Principal Celestia about us dumping our cursed artifacts in your world, I am very sorry), and a pop duo, Postcrush, who wanted everything to be perfect in their show... You were trapped for at least year in a REAL timeloop, unlike me and Spike who were more experiencing worse and worse distorted timeline. While at the same time, experiencing multiple ALTERNATE timelines, some where you were trapped for eternity, some where the loop ran for eternity at high speed, and many worse, did Yoga for a few loops, sleep through one, didn't trust Trixie in spite of proving her friendship. Experience multiple alternate PASTS... Accused the Sirens of being behind the timeloop of course, but they weren't for once. The power of friendship did NOT work on a VIP guard... did some, naughty things my mother would not approve of with the timeloop. Began to truly go insane, and time itself began to go mad when you were chasing a shadow and suddenly having a fashion show... " Sunset nodded. "Anyone who thinks timeloops are fun needs their head examined... In particular in one timeline where I figured the answer was to smash the Twirler... and it trapped me in the loop for eternity instead! ... I... I can actually SENSE that eternity... How does Celestia not go insane?!" Sunset looked ready to cry. Princess Twilight wonder how she and Cadence were not going to go insane. "That's... a good question... here... let's play some chess... No 'I must be the winner' this time, just us playing chess, let the best mare win." "...Thanks Twilight." Session 94.1 Unown3 https://mlp.fandom.com/wiki/Friendship_is_Magic_Issue_74 "Good luck Zephyr! Get your fortune back!" Shouted a pale violet earth pony mare with brown eyes. Her mane was a slightly darker violet with a shirt tail cut, and had multiple ear piercings. Her cutie mark was a pair of scissors. "Who are you?" Rainbow Dash asked flatly. "Oh! I'm Pixie Cut! I'm a friend of Zephyr's! Nice guy isn't he?" She said with no irony or sarcasm. Rainbow Dash zipped over to Discord. "I will do ANYTHING if you can use your cosmic powers to get those two on a date!" "Anything?" Discord snapped his fingers, and a maid dress appeared, with a box next to it with the words 'wings in here'. And a box marked 'How to always dress in style.' Rainbow Dash swallowed. Then looked at Zephyr Breeze again, who battered his eyelash at her. "Yes!" Discord zapped her. "Oh .... my... darling!" Session 94.2 sonicandmario826 "You want a hug", Twilight said before the game started. Sunset just simply nodded and the two friends gave each other good long hug. Session 94.3 Unown3 Shining Armor had the sinking suspicion he'd been given this enchanted comic as a joke... a joke that had fallen flat. "VHY?! ... VHY!? I shot at your legs! I shot at your legs! Vou should have been no more!" Shouted the villain in confusion and misery. Shining Armor, dressed as Captain Equestria with his mighty shield, said, "You do realize I don't just have super strength, but superior reaction time, superior ability to process visual information right?" "Vhy...." Moaned the villain, pinned underneath Shining Armor's body weight and his very un-shot legs. Session 94.4 Unown3 *spoilers for She's All Yak* "Hey Twilight, you seen these newest posters over the Dragon Lands, Griffonstone, and the Changeling Hive? And Diamondia? And Yakyakistan? And the Storm Empire? And Klugetown?" Spike asked. "Huh?... 'Don't Let Ponies Make You Something You're not: Burn And Pillage!' 'Don't Let Ponies Make You Something You're not: Eat Them!' 'Don't Let Ponies Make You Something You're not: Keep Your Love To Yourself!' 'Don't Let Ponies Make You Something You're not: Enslave Them!' 'Don't Let Ponies Make You Something You're not: Smash Them!' 'Don't Let Ponies Make You Something You're not: CONQUER THE WORLD!' 'Don't Let Ponies Make You Something You're not: Sell Their Bodies Parts After Enslaving Them!' Wha... WHAT IS THIS?!" "I'm guessing that 'Evil Unbound' magazine caught wind of the apologizes to Yona..." Session 94.5 Mtangalion (Spoilers for She's All Yak) The day after the big dance, Twilight was cheerfully addressing one of her classes, while levitating a piece of chalk to underline 'Enhancing Your Roleplaying with Real World Cultural Knowledge.' "You know, we got so caught up in helping Yona, we never even considered other creatures besides yaks. Who wants to share something about their big traditional celebrations with the class?" Gallus smirked. "Because that couldn't possibly go worse than the last time we all shared, right?" He realized that Twilight was tapping a hoof at him. "Oh, you heard that. Um... believe it or not, griffons get super-into rap battles. Because they suck at dancing, and they literally cannot sing. Except for Gabby, somehow." He whispered to Smolder, "I still think that hen is part pony." Smolder buffed her chest scales smugly. "Dragons have the hottest pool parties. Lava pool parties." Silverstream waved a claw. "Ooh, me next! Hippogriff dancing kind of needs three dimensions... air or water. Maybe pegasi could learn some of our dances?" Pavel kicked back in his desk. "Wolves howl at moon, to praise goddess Luna!" "Dogs howl at the moon cause it's fun!" countered Scruff. The two pups glared at each other, growling faintly. Ocellus sighed. "Chrysalis wasn't really big on 'non-productive' gatherings. I think we spent so much time copying other creatures, we forgot what our own celebrations were, if we ever had any..." The other students aww'd, and swept her up in a group hug. If nothing else about the Pony Way was catching on with other creatures, group hugs definitely were. Session 94.6 Unown3 In the were-beast enchanted comic, Rainbow Dash and her were-cheetahs, and Pinkie Pie's were monkeys were entrenching themselves for the inevitable attack by Spike and his were-kirin (the pony/dragon hybrid kind). Along the stink bombs Fluttershy had secretly loaned them. They didn't expect a blond and white were-fox carrying a white flag to show up at their combined doorstep first. "Parlay!" The werefox shouted. "Our Alpha, Rarity. has been absorbed by the were-kirin... we the were-foxes would like to offer our services." Pinkie Pie the were-monkey swung from her tail, "Heyyy! I know that voice! The NPC version of Prince Blueblood?" "YOU want to join us?" Rainbow Dash asked. "Well... safety in numbers. The were-skunks are staying neutral. We've lost our alpha as I said. Princess Twilight's were-owls and Applejack's pack have all been absorbed by the were-kirin. The two of you have put things on hold, and we'd like to offer our assistence." "Huddle," said Rainbow Dash. The two alphas did so. "So, do we attack them together and split them between us?" Rainbow Dash. "Naw. We can't afford a big fight right now. With Rarity taken out, the were-foxes can't actually win the game anymore." Huddle broke. "Fine Blueblood, you're part of our alliance now." ++++ "Too bad my were-foxes got away," Rarity lamented. "Even without them, and even without Fluttershy's were-skunks. With my former were-owls and Applejack's former pack. We out number them," Twilight said. "With good tactics by me we can out smart them easily. Pinkie Pie is unpredictable and Rainbow Dash isn't cowardly, but neither are exactly good generals." Session 94.7 Mtangalion "Bwahaha!" Spike grinned toothily at them all, sitting behind the Oubliette Overseer’s screen. "And so, the final Element of Harmony comes into the claws of mighty Reaper. Behold! With this omnipotent power, no longer shall pony mares vastly outnumber stallions. I will make the ratio balanced, as all things should be!" The young dragon switched to his narrator voice. "The Mad Griffon Reaper puts the last gem into the Harmony Clawntlet! What will the brave heroes do next? Crimson Conjurer?" Twilight thumped her hooves on the table. "Now is not the time to give up hope, girls! We still have one chance to save the day... even if Iron Mare and Foresight let themselves get talked into helping the villain!" Cadence and Shining Armor grinned sheepishly, looking like foals with their hooves caught in the cookie jar. Rainbow Dash raised one hoof confidently. "Valkyrie hangs back, waiting for *just* the right moment to attack." Applejack groaned. "Waitin’ to charge in at the last moment and get all the glory, ya mean. We’ve gotta go now! Captain Equestria rounds up the rest of the team and leads the charge straight towards Reaper!" "Saddle Rager will definitely stop that super-meanie!" said Fluttershy. She rolled the twenty-sided die and got a 17. "Um… yay?" Spike rolled his dice behind the screen and winced. "Oof, not quite enough. Reaper waves the Clawntlet and uses Laughter to make Saddle Rager giggle until she’s not angry anymore." "My turn, my turn!" squealed Pinkie, rolling the die with her hair. Spike checked the game module. "14 means… Reaper uses the power of Honesty to dispel all Coyote’s illusions, and then he kicks the real Coyote away." Applejack rolled next. "18! Captain Equestria grapples with Reaper and grabs the Clawntlet!" "Ooh, so close," said Spike. "She actually manages to wrassle with Reaper for ten whole seconds before he uses Magic to toss her away! That just leaves… Valkyrie?" Dash scooped up the D20 with a wing. "Wait for it… wait for it…" She threw… and rolled a natural 20! "Valkyrie strikes an ultra badflank pose and throws Bifrost straight at Reaper’s chest!" Everyone gasped… even Spike. "Um… are you sure you want to…" Dash leaned across the table, glaring. "You’re not tricking me this time! That’s what I said, and that’s what Valkyrie’s gonna do!" Spike took a deep breath. "Her newly forged cosmic axe stabs Reaper right in the chest… and then he whispers, ‘You should have gone for the head!’ He lifts the Clawntlet, snaps his claws, and vanishes!" The Map Room grew deathly quiet. "Um… what just happened?" asked Applejack. "What the hay did he do?" Spike simply picked up a coin and flipped it seven times, scribbling down the results. "Iron Mare, Captain Equestria, and Coyote all sparkle and turn into stallions. The same thing is happening all over the battlefield… soon, half of ALL of the mares have turned into stallions." "We… lost?!" said a dumbfounded Rainbow. "Wait, wait, wait… We can’t just lose! Bad guy wins, the end! Come on!" Grinning smugly, Spike reached down and thumped another thick heavy adventure module onto the table. "Well, nobody said it was the end." Applejack’s jaw fell open. "Harmony War... Part Two!? Wait just one apple-picking minute… Everything we did already was only part one, the whole time?" Twilight narrowed her eyes, catching on. "So we were always going to lose this battle, no matter what!?" Spike chuckled nervously. "Um, maybe?" "Gahhh!" Garble and Smolder looked up sharply, and saw Spike flying just as fast as his little wings could carry him, with Applejack galloping after him with a lasso, and Rainbow Dash and Twilight in hot pursuit from the air. "Head him off at the pass!" "Spike!! How much of the library budget did you spend on that?!" "Rainbow Danger Dash does not approve of no-win scenarios!" Smolder blinked. "Huh. There’s an angry mob chasing a dragon, and it isn’t you." Garble scratched his head-fin. "I know, right?" Session 94.8 Unown3 "Say WHAT?" Applejack exclaimed. Twilight Sparkle behind the Overseer screen reiterated, "The gods have grown tired of their ponies abandoning them simply because another god gave them fancier parlor tricks, rather than caring about the beliefs or teachings of their deities. As such, your adventuring party has randomly selected by the High Priests of your faiths, to prove the gods are wrong that mortals actually do care what their god actually stands for, and not just who can hand out the better toys." "Well, this outta be easy, of course I believe in god-that-gives-me-plus-one-on-my-attack-roll, not just cause they give me combat bonus'," Rainbow Dash said. "That is not encouraging at all darling... At least I know I'm in good favor with Aphrodite," Rarity said. "My monk has spread her message of love and beauty everywhere she goes." "And that's why that camp of orcs in the Swamp of Death now all wear pink bows on their helmets," Applejack said flatly. Session 94.9 Unown3 *spoilers for end of Star Vs* Sunset felt a buzz from her journal, but was surprised to see it was a message from Starlight. "'Stop Twilight after she comes through the portal! I couldn't stop her! She saw the end of Starry Vs Armies of Evil'?" "RAWR!" Princess Twilight, eye glowing red, surrounded by swirling dark magic fuel by rage. "LET ME AT THEM! WHERE ARE THEY?!" She spoke in a demonic voice. "'Magic is better off gone?!' What kinda of hate filled propaganda is that?! Is Cozy Glow behind this?!" -- "MY PRINCESS CALLS! I MUST JOIN HER!" Snarled straight haired Pinkamena, kicking her legs, tied up in a chair. Normally this wouldn't have stopped her, but Maud Pie was standing guard. Session 94.10 Grogar-the-oneser "You want me to WHAT!?!" Glowworm screamed "Keep your voice down idiots!" Chrysalis hissed as both Tirek and Cozy Glow glared at him "But you want me to hide Grogar bell, Grogar, the father of monsters! The guy who can and will kill us in horrifying and brutal ways if he realizes were hiding this from him!" Glowworm gulped. "Glowworm, you forgetting one really important thing." "W-what that?" "I AM YOUR QUEEN AND YOU WILL DO AS I SAY OR SO HELP ME I WILL FORCE FEED YOU TO TIREK AS A PROTEIN POWDER!!" Queen Chrysalis snapped. Session 94.11 Mtangalion Being a substitute Oubliette Master for Ponyville's unofficial flock of griffons could be interesting, to say the least. Gilda clapped her claws together. "Okay! We're ready to move on." She noticed Spike stretching in his seat, and putting a thick paperback novel away. "Huh, you're still here? And awake?" Spike looked up at her. "Why wouldn't I be?" "Well, we did just spend half an hour dividing up the loot, " said Gallus, looking a bit guilty. Spike grinned. "Oh, I totally get that. Hoards are important, after all! There's nothing quite so satisfying as having your super-important stuff sorted and secure with everything in the proper place, right?" Gilda blinked slowly, then nodded, grinning. "You're a good kid, scales." So the mighty griffon heroes adventured onward, and another half hour later, Spike was reading the description of a boss encounter from the adventure module. "The demonic beast roars and stamps its paws, shaking the very earth! It must be at least a hundred feet tall! Alicorn Prince Luster gulps and says, 'Prepare yourselves, friends! We must fight as one, or face certain doom!'" Gallus snorted. "You mean, all of us, ganging up on one monster? That's no fun." Spike stared at them. "But this monster really is... I mean... Prince Luster says, 'Don't underestimate it! The Terrornax is the most fearsome monster in the world!" Gabby yawned and shrugged her wings. "Let's rock-paper-scissors to see which of us fights it." "Sounds good to me!" said Gilda, cracking her knuckles. Spike facepalmed. "You know this isn't Dragon Egg, right? Did a griffon write Dragon Egg? Cause, that would make so much sense right now." Session 94.12 Unown3 Drinking a juice box, Button Mash looked up to see a time portal open the sky, and down came a black pegasus stallion with a silver mane, and a 'character sheet' cutie mark. On his forehead was a scar in the name of a natural 1 on a 20 sided dice. "BUTTON MASH!" He took a glowing red laser sword with one of his wings. "I have to come to destroy you before you can ever become the Prince of Gaming, and burning this mark of shame upon my forehead for calling the alignment system in Ogres and Oubliettes stupid!" Button Mash said, "Well... this isn't how I expected my afternoon to be." Session 94.13 Mtangalion Button Mash took a confident stance, adjusting his propeller beanie. "Now's my chance to try out that new Discord favor... Activate game console!" A floating electric-blue window with scrolling text materialized. "Okay! I cast Libra, and..." Button gasped. "Level 47?!" He clapped his forehooves to the sides of his head. "I'm only level 20! Hey Discord! I think I'm gonna need another favor!" In the fashion of a classic Last Fantasy summon, time seemed to stand still, as a tidal wave swept into Ponyville out of nowhere, carrying Smolder the colossal sea serpent, who dramatically spat out a clean and dry Discord before quickly swimming away again and taking all the water with her. Discord brushed a bit of lint from his shoulder. "Normally, I enjoy watching time travelers take an axe to the status quo, but threatening little colts? That is just not done, sir!" The black pegasus didn't flinch. "Fortunately, I came prepared..." He whipped his cloak aside and held something up. "...with this Anti-Chaos Amulet!" Discord stopped advancing and flinched, to the sound of a comedic car crash. Then he looked at the Fourth Wall and said "Ever have one of those days when you're sure you must have woken up in the wrong fic?" But just then, Button's game console chimed. 'Sir McBiggun and Cheer Princess have joined the party!' Button blinked. "Huh?" And just like that, two adult ponies came galloping over, standing protectively on Button's left and right. "What do you think you're doing, threatening one of my students?" demanded Miss Cheerilee. "You'd better have a good explanation." "Eeyup!" growled Big Mac. Session 94.14 Mtangalion (Spoilers for "Sweet and Smoky") Headmare Twilight cleared her throat. "I know you're all wondering why I called you here, so I'll get right to the point." Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash shared curious looks. Smolder clasped her claws behind her head and stretched, seeming indifferent. Garble reached down and nudged Spike, grinning wickedly. "Uh oh! They must have found out about that thing you did." "What?!" yelped Spike. "What did I do? Wait, I haven't done anything! Quit messing with me, Garble!" Garble guffawed. "But messing with you is so much fun!" "Ahem!" Twilight used her magic to lift up a heavy chunk of stone, carved up with claw-marks on one side. "This message from Dragon Lord Ember appeared in my office via dragonfire... and crushed one of my favorite paperweights in the process... but never mind that now." Spike flew over and started reading the dragon runes. "Huh... 'As Dragon Lord, I command all dragons at the school to return to the Dragon Lands at once to address an urgent matter. Smolder, make sure your brother comes too instead of making an excuse to slack off.'" Spike blinked. "Wait... brother?!" Twilight picked up reading where Spike had left off. "'He's temporarily unbanished for this occasion. Also, if you have any other creatures who are experts in dragon eggs and hatchlings, please ask them to come as well.'" Fluttershy gasped. "Did you say hatchlings?! Cute, adorable baby dragon hatchlings?! I'd be happy to go!" Spike landed in front of Smolder. "Whoa! Your brother lives here in Equestria, Smolder?! Why didn't you ever mention him? Huh, I bet he's a pretty cool guy!" He flew up and elbowed Garble. "Not like certain other dragons around here!" Smolder arched an eyeridge. "Heh, good one, Spike." She smirked at Garble. "Better pack your bongo drums, Gar-Gar. You're going home!" Garble gnashed his teeth, jabbing a claw towards her. "I swear, sis, if you call me Gar-Gar one more time, I'm gonna start calling you Wet Blanket!" "Uh, guys?" asked Spike uncertainly. "Am I missing something here?" Smolder blinked. "Oh, you didn't know," she said. "Garble's my brother." As if this fact was no more interesting than the price of apples in Appleloosa. Spike's jaw dropped, but nothing coherent came out. "Wha... Buh..." "Ooh, somecreature had a secret sibling," crowed Rainbow. "That totally never happens around here more often than a bad O&O plotline." Twilight frowned. "Rainbow, my brother wasn't a secret! Queen Chrysalis erased my memories of Shining so I wouldn't spoil her plans. That's my story and I'm sticking to it." Fluttershy sighed. "I wish I could forget that I have a brother." "Me too," said Rainbow Dash. She paused, realizing how that sounded. "I mean, I wish I could forget that Fluttershy has a brother! I definitely don't have a secret older sister who's an awesome Alicorn version of myself who goes with adventures with me in a fanfic I wrote! ... I'll just shut up now." "How... since when..." sputtered Spike. He flew right up in Smolder and Garble's faces. "All these months, all those card games and O&O sessions and hanging out together, and now I'm supposed to believe that you were brother and sister the whole time!? And neither of you EVER bothered to mention that fact? Seriously?!" He chuckled. "Next you'll tell me that Smolder likes wearing cute dresses, and Garble's a poet!" Both of the older young dragons cringed. "Yeah..." said Garble. Smolder coughed. "About that..." Sometime later, in the Friendship Academy's theater, a magical spotlight snapped on, illuminating the stage. Garble played bongos, wearing a striped sweater and a beret, while Smolder wore a dress and spoke softly into a microphone. "Goodbye dignity... Farewell to... self respect. Hello, friends... Can you dig it?" The students with opposable digits snapped them in politely enthusiastic applause. Session 94.15 Mtangalion Princess Twilight Sparkle skimmed through the reports from the recent Dragon Lands mission, eyes widening. "Um, Fluttershy? I don’t want to alarm you, but I’m surprised you didn’t get your head bitten off for touching dragon eggs without permission. What happened to all the parents of those eggs? Wasn’t anydragon keeping watch?" Fluttershy shook her head hesitantly. "Well… no! Actually, I didn’t see all that many dragons who even looked old enough to be parents, and I didn’t see any of those scary giant elders at all!" "But, we saw lots of elders at the dragon migration," Spike pointed out. "Where did they all go?" Smolder rolled her eyes, arms folded across her chest. "Ugh, tell me about it. I bet mom could have refilled the lava pool in two minutes with one paw." She sighed, breathing a plume of ash. "I bet they were off playing O&O again..." Far beyond the skies of Equus, two teleport flashes marked the arrival of Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, wearing golden war armor instead of royal regalia. "My apologies for our lateness," said Celestia. The immense Queen Supia leaned closer, giving her a booming raspy chuckle. "Don’t worry, Celestia-ojosan, Luna-ojosan. You haven’t missed anything yet." Luna gave the changeling queen an apologetic bow-between-equals, for all that she could have perched on Supia’s muzzle. "We had hoped to leave Twilight in charge of everything at home by now, but…" "But we all must play the hands or claws we’re dealt," purred Gerulf. The massive griffon narrowed his eyes, peering into the Void beyond. "They are coming. Grand Griffons, ready your arms!" A full flight of grand griffons flew into formation, drawing bows as tall as a castle tower each… enough demi-godly might to lay waste to entire mortal kingdoms… and just a part of the gathered Titan Defense Force. "Steady, steady!" shouted Geri, the Jotuun deer. "Do not charge into battle too soon!" "I’ll charge when I damned well please!" retorted Seismos the armored earth pony titan, but he muttered and held his ground, watching their enemy finally arrive. Former Dragon Lord Torch grinned savagely, nodding to the rest of his horde of dragon elders. "This is where the fun begins!" A biomechanical horror the size of an entire planet warped into the space before them. "WE ARE THE EARTHBOUND KINGS. YOU WILL JOIN WITH US, OR YOU WILL DIE. OUR WARFLEET BLOTS OUT THE STARS THEMSELVES." Queen Supia raised a jagged changeling glaive. "Then we will fight in the dark! Attack!!" The enemy ships swarmed towards them. While Seismos snarled and started destroying capital ships with one hoof-punch each, and Cawr’s brothers controlled the weather of space itself to melt foes with solar flares, Torch turned to his dragon horde. "Well, you puny little lizards?" boomed Torch. "Do you want to defend your lands and gold, your mates and eggs, your very world… or don’t you?" With one voice, the dragons answered "WE... WANT!!" Gerulf whistled, watching the greedy dragon elders pounce on an Earthbound King that he’d just crippled by filling it full of arrows, rending it to pieces. "We have *got* to invite those fellows to the next Taurus Peninsula Grand Tournament…" Two days later, Torch lay sprawled in his lair, sporting some memorable new scratches in his ancient horns and scales. "Don’t bother me with such things, Ember," he grumbled. "I’ve had an exhausting week, and you’re Dragon Lord now. I’m sure you can handle everything." Ember flew up and lightly bopped her father’s nose with the Ruby Scepter. "Exhausting?" she said with a smirk. "Sure, dad. Whatever you say." Session 94.16 Unown3 Alien Ants shouted dropping their guns and holding up their hands, "We surrender!" Scootaloo in a space suit and big laser gun shrugged and said, "Yeah, you see, I can't progress through the level until I kill all the enemies... so yeah, sorry." The entire room was then covered in green goo. Scootaloo strafed three the door, heroic science fiction music playing. (Parody of Jet Force Gemini.) Session 94.17 Ardashir Spike was playing online with Smolder and Garble on World of Horsecraft in an in-game quest that revolved around saving dragon eggs from being snatched by Tirek's villains and the hatchlings turned into vicious monsters. In the game a few renegade dragons were helping the villains, and to the shock of the three: "Huh?" Garble couldn't believe what he was seeing. "Wait, an albino dragon, a fat brown dragon, and a skinny purple one with long blonde hair?" Garble rubbed his eyes. "Yeesh, does everything that happens in this world end up in this game?" "How do dragons even have hair anyway?" Spike muttered. "Hey, Gar-Gar," Smolder scratched her scaly chin. "What happened with Fizzle, Clump, and Fume, anyway? I mean, with their almost wiping out a whole generation of dragons?" "Beats me." Garble shrugged. "Ember said she was gonna handle it. Said she'd think of something to keep them out of trouble for a while. Not like I gotta worry about it." Outside the Friendship Palace: "So," Twilight said coldly, reading the message Ember sent as the three cowering dragons stood before her. "I'm supposed to keep an eye on your three, just like with Garble." She turned and yelled, "Sludge! You just got three assistants! Come out here and tell them what their work is!" As Sludge lead the three teen dragons off, swaggering with the knowledge that now he was the boss, Twilight shook her head in disgust. "Ugh, Ember! What's the matter with her? Sending her failures and criminals to Equestria instead of keeping an eye on them herself. Like ponies would do that!" And on the other side of the Mirror Gate: "Yeesh, Adagio, what's wrong?" Aria looked up from the mop bucket she and her sister were permitted to use for cleaning the floors at CrystalSoft. "Nothing," Adagio said. "Just felt like someone stuck me with a pin and I remembered the ponies banishing us here." She snarled, "And I'll still get even with them one day!" Session 94.18 Mtangalion (Not intended to be an allegory of any real life events, just an exploration of fictional ones.) Officially, Princess Twilight Sparkle had designated the large third-story chamber with the sweeping view of Ponyville as her sitting room. In practice, this meant that it had more small tables and comfy chairs than other rooms in the castle… and just as many shelves full of books. While Twilight enjoyed a calm, relaxing sip of tea, Rainbow Dash had mostly forgotten her own cup in favor of scarfing up the scones, sitting there on the edge of her seat. "Come on, Twi, don’t keep me in suspense! How did Big Mac and Cheerilee save Button Mash from that crazy future pony?!" Twilight set her teacup down. "Well, you see…" A loud rubbery squeaking sound interrupted them. Both ponies looked towards the large crystal windows, and were surprised to see a white falcon/snow leopard griffon hovering outside, wiping soapy water off one window pane, then taking his squeegee to the next. "Um…" Dash stared. "There’s a griffon out there. Cleaning." Princess Twilight shrugged. "Yes?" The griffon noticed them and waved, giving the princess an enthusiastic claws-up before flying away to clean the next room’s windows. "Making things less messy. Instead of, you know, making a bigger mess." "That’s a little species-ist, Rainbow," said Twilight. "But yeah, it does seem strange." Smart Cookie the Thirty-Third, Twilight’s recently-hired Chief Strategist and manager of much of the nonsense that came with being a Princess of Equestria, glanced up from his ledgers. "Why yes, Princess. I did hire several griffons into the castle staff. I hope I haven’t overstepped my bounds." "Not at all," said Princess Twilight brightly. "If I have to employ anyone at all, then of course, you should consider any creature who’s honest and capable." Outside the new guard barracks behind the Friendship Castle, one of the largest griffons that Twilight and Rainbow had ever seen (not counting certain Grand Griffons and growth spells) was absolutely savaging a training dummy, leaping and hovering on outstretched wings, then diving in to slash with twin claw-blades. If this had been one of Button Mash’s video games, the combo meter definitely would have been up in the double digits. Three other griffons in Twilight Guard armor were watching with rapt attention, and several more guards had come to watch as well… two pegasi, a hippogriff, and… a diamond dog? Guard Captain Equal Libram glanced away from the gray-feathered griffon warrior. "Gabriel? You don’t need to worry about him carelessly hurting anycreature, Princess. I’ve seen him be as gentle as a kitten when some foals were here on the castle tour." The unicorn frowned, then sighed. "Unfortunately, we’re going to need his skills when we go after that gang of griffon bandits who’ve moved into the Everfree." Rainbow Dash perked up. "Bandits, huh?" She grinned, smacking her forehooves together. "You need any help with that? I pummeled, like, two dozen changelings once. Back when they were all bad guys, I mean." The captain laughed. "Aren’t you busy enough saving Equestria every month, Miss Dash? Leave the rest of us something to do." "Of course it’s all a conspiracy!" declared Rose. Daisy nodded fervently. "Griffons couldn’t defeat ponies in war, so now they’re moving here and taking over Equestria from within!" "Would you like a pamphlet, princess?" asked Lily Valley. "Uh… sure!" said Princess Twilight, taking it in her magic while backing away slowly. "So, what’s your take on all this?" asked Princess Twilight, while Rainbow Dash snatched another free mint from the bowl on the mayor’s desk. The Mayor of Ponyville adjusted her glasses while she collected her thoughts. "Well… for a long time, it’s been the official policy of Equestria that anycreature is welcome to live here, so long as they support themselves, pay their taxes, and obey our laws. We never actually had enough newcomers to rile anypony up… until a bunch of griffons heard about friendship and opportunity, and decided to go flying off in all directions instead of cleaning up their mess at home. How did that all start… a certain Friendship Mission, wasn’t it?" Rainbow chuckled, sinking a little lower in her seat. "Whoopsie?" Mayor Mare waved a hoof. "No, no… it’s fine. This has all been a net positive, really it has! It’s just overwhelming at times. Why, we’re going to have a whole neighborhood of traditional griffon houses soon, and a greatly expanded fishery and *two* more meat restaurants. What we really need, though, is for Griffonstone to get a proper king or queen again, someone who can rebuild their nation, before the entire nation tries to move in with us!" Twilight grinned. "Actually, I’ve been doing some research, and I do have someone in mind. She just doesn’t know it yet." In the deepest depths of the Abysmal Abyss, a griffon hen dug through deep river muck, grousing under her breath… until her claws scraped something solid. "Aha!" She dug her find out of the mud, then splashed it in the river until she saw the golden gleam of the Idol of Boreas. "I knew it was around here somewhere!" Gilda tore her goggles off and held her prize up to the sun… but she quickly frowned. "Eh, now that I see it up close, it looks like a stupid bowling trophy or something. Maybe Gerold can use it for a paperweight." Unexpectedly, she shivered and clutched the Idol to her chest, feathers and fur fluffing. "Whoa. Felt like something walked over my grave..." Session 94.19 Ardashir (Note: In honor of Chrysalis Appreciation Day) "And then I backstab Silverstream's character!" Ocellus laughed at the look on the shocked hippogriff's face. The rest of her friends sitting around the table stared at her in disbelief as she crowed. "Hah! You don't have any more clones, do you?" "Well, no, but..." Silverstream slumped in her chair and looked at the 'Paranoia' game book. "I don't think I like this one." "That's just because you're losing," Ocellus sneered. She cast a superior look around the table. "Come on, roll the dice, let's get back to the game." "Uh, we can't." Gallus sat up and stabbed a claw at her. "You killed all our clones! We had a mission to do." "We did it." Ocellus said in her usual cheery tone. She giggled and clapped her claws. "We got the information on all the traitors and mutants and Dirty Commies in the hive -- I mean Alpha Complex..." "An' all OUR names were on it," Smolder huffed. Arms folded over her chest, she said, "Yeesh, is everybody in this place a traitor? What kinda dumbbell computer runs a mess like that?" She winced as Ocellus leered at her. "You just questioned the wisdom of Friend Computer!" Smolder jumped to her feet, eyes filled with fury. "Ya already fried my last clone when I asked about that traitor list we were sent ta find, because there ain't no traitors in Alpha Complex, remember?" "Yona wonders what is wrong with friend Ocellus," the yak girl sounded suspicious. She pounded the table with one hoof. "Ocellus usually nice bug-pony, but when play this game she becomes a mean backstabber. Yona does not like seeing Yona's friend act this way." "You're just mad because I got rid of your last clone by having her test that experimental plasma cannon." "But plas-whatever cannon not even work!" Yona yelled. "And when Yona say it piece of junk, you blast Yona-5 and yell, 'Only a mutant traitor would question the scientists of Alpha Complex!'" "Speaking as Friend Computer -- I mean, speaking as your real-life friend, we're wondering about you, Ocellus," Sandbar got up from his place at the head of the table. Stepping around the GM screen, he said, "You're acting like Chrys --" He broke off as Ocellus rose up on buzzing wings. "Go on, finish it!" Ocellus snarled a buggy snarl. "You were gonna say 'I act just like Chrysalis' - and maybe I AM her!" She looked around at her friends. The hurt looks on their faces changed to deeply suspicious ones. "Ugh! We used to play this game all the time in the Hive when Chrysalis ruled us. It was one of the few ways to get her favor without hurting somepony I used to beat Princess Imago all the time, Queen Chrysalis would say I was smarter than her own nymphs." She sank back in her chair. "Look, I am not Chrysalis." "Yes -- you -- are!" Everyone at the table gaped as the door slammed open. Crawling through was a beaten and bruised Ocellus. She pointed at the other 'her' and gasped out, "She knocked me unconscious, said she was gonna replace every one of you with Black Hive Changelings, but she wanted to, to humiliate you first..." She slumped unconscious to the floor. With a chittering growl Ocellus flew from her chair and grabbed 'herself'. "Hah! Lousy trick, Chrysalis! My friends will never believe..." She looked up just in time to go down under the rest of the Student Six. "GET HER!" As the battle raged, the 'Ocellus' on the floor smiled, slipped out into the hallway, and turned into a completely different pony. "Heh, who ever thought that my permitting those nymphs to play that wonderful game would help like this? Now to take care of that old goat's task," she spat, "and get home to rejoice over getting one of those tootie-fruitie traitors beaten up." That happy thought in mind, Chrysalis sauntered down the hallway as the sounds of Changeling shrieks came from behind the shut door behind her. Session 94.20 Mtangalion Sweetie Belle pushed more magic into the dark orb floating above her horn, sticking her tongue out. "Alisa, can I ask a question? You use dark magic all the time, so why is your lair so... well, cozy?" The gray and white-furred diamond wolf cackled. "What, just because Alisa's dark mage, she should sit on stone floor instead of comfy sofa?" She stretched out, joints creaking a bit, and wagged her tail with amusement. She gestured to the many glow gems which lit up the chilly cavern beneath Icehome like a scene from a Hearth's Warming play. "Should she sit in spooky dark and squint to read her books? Hah!" She bared just a hint of her sharp fangs. "Now focus, pay attention to lesson! Finish spell." Sweetie flinched, resisting the urge to adjust her scarf like Rarity would have. "R-right!" She furrowed her brow... and instead of fizzling, the orb flew off her horn and popped, becoming another Sweetie Belle! "Yes! I did it!" shouted both Sweetie Belles, in exactly the same voice and tone. Then the new Sweetie blinked, frowning. "Aw, come on... I'm the copy? Why am I the copy?" "Not copy," growled Alisa. "Shadow clone. See?" She flicked the clone's ear with a claw, and the startled clone vanished in a puff of dark smoke. At the same time, the original Sweetie gasped. "Whoa, it really works! I remember everything that the other me saw and thought. Wow, just think of all the cool things I can do with this spell!" "Sweetie could," muttered Alisa. "But ten years too soon to expect her to do anything smart with it, yes." Alisa nodded to herself sagely. "She'll just use magic for silly games, like other ponies." "What?! No I won't..." Sweetie #2 grabbed the twenty-sided die and shook it in her hoof, somehow. "My turn! I'm rolling for initiative!" Sweetie #3 groaned. "Would you just hold your horses? I'm still negotiating with the goblin chieftain!" And the original Sweetie Belle tapped a hoof impatiently. "Hey, who's in charge of this party, anyway? Hoof me those dice so I can roll my charisma check." Button Mash stared from behind the OM's screen. He'd started out enraptured by the thought of going on a "date" with three Sweetie Belles at once, but now... "Um, is this really okay? Aren't you going to get a huge headache when you dismiss the clones and get their memories all at once?" "It's okay," said Sweetie Belle, charging her horn again. "I'll make Sweetie #4 to run to Zecora's for a headache cure!" Session 94.21 Unown3 SPOILERS FOR 'THE LAST CRUSADE' episode! Scootaloo jumped and fluttered her wings. "Gee Rainbow Dash! Thanks for finally legally adopting me!" Rainbow ruffled her mane. "No problem kiddo! It was a long time coming! We've been family all this time! Now it's just official!" "Not to rain on this beautiful moment darling," Rarity said. "But aren't you worried that if Scootaloo's biological family finds her, this will result in a conflict with no heroes or villains and no clean simple solution?" "Aw come on! What are the chances of that happening now? They've had over NINE YEARS, what are the chances of them showing up now?" Pinkie Pie said, "Though it would be an interesting problem with us having to deal with something we can't just friendship away. I mean, if that did happen, I'm sure lots of ponies would want to know what actually happens, and not just be happy the long journey is over and utterly ignore such a tantalizing thread that had been built up for so long, leaving us feeling empty a little that something like that failed to inspire anypony!" - Lyra shivered. Bon Bon gave the love of her life a hug. "Everything okay, dear?" "I felt like some great cosmic force scanned us, taken what had occurred with us naturally, then created artificial copies." "Whatever it is, I know you can handle it!" Tootsie Flute hugged Lyra too. "Thanks sweetie," Lyra patted little Tootsie Flute on the head, happy for the love their adopted daughter showed. - Twilight asked, "Pinkie Pie are you okay?" Pinkie Pie said, "I sense a we're one universe off from having a neat nice clean-cut solution that now won't function in our world... that I might have already seen the normal on Discord's spirit-tube in Chaosville, like where Garble was never banished and never attended the friendship school. And seeing that world leaves you feeling MORE alienated than you already did, and creates a sense of the creators selling out on something and creating something artificially that before was done organically and leaves this sense of 'hoof of author' and damages your suspension of disbelief, and what should be a shocking emotional event with no good ponies or bad ponies instead feels like it was turned into a vessel for social activism, and actually ironically contradicts a previous relatively recent episode these same ponies were involved in, but I'm saying which one because that was be spoilers." "Uh.... ooooookaaaaay... So uh, Scootaloo is bringing Rainbow Dash to parents day at school today?" "Yeah, that's gonna get awkward real fast for all involved." "Huh? Why?" "Oh, you'll see soon enough." Session 94.22 Mtangalion "Hi, Princess Twilight!" shouted Sweetie Belle as she galloped past. "Bye, Princess Twilight! Sorry I can’t talk, I’m on a mission!" Twilight blinked, then looked over her shoulder, but there was no sign of the other Crusaders, or of any angry creatures chasing after them. "Well, that was odd." She watched Sweetie race into the Carousel Boutique. "Wait, she was carrying one of Zecora’s saddlebags. Oh no… is somepony hurt?" Not wasting any more time, Twilight teleported straight into the Boutique, and froze… There was Sweetie Belle, opening the saddlebag… and Sweetie Belle sitting at the table… and going through the fridge… and sweet-talking a blushing Button Mash. Twilight’s expression curled into a disturbing grin, and her mane grew frazzled. "Either some unreformed changelings or sneaky wolves are getting really sloppy about their infiltration, or it’s…" Echoes of ‘Fun, fun, fun!’ romped through Twilight’s head. "Clones!" She cackled, charging her horn. Too late, the Sweetie next to Button looked up. "Wait, no!" Twilight fired four beams in rapid succession, teleporting across the room after each. The clones went pop, pop, pop! The real Sweetie said "Ouch," having only felt a sharp poke on one leg, but then she gasped, freezing up. "Sweetie!" yelled Button. The colt glared at Twilight, then shook Sweetie. "Are you okay?" Sweetie blinked several times. "Uh… wow. This feedback from integrating four sets of memories all at once really isn’t that bad. Yeah… I can totally handle this!" Then her eyes rolled up, and she fell over like a sack of potatoes. Twilight’s jaw dropped. "Er… oops?" A little later, Sweetie lay sprawled on the sofa, groaning, with a cloth covering her eyes. "There, there," said Rarity soothingly, bringing a glass of some kind of mixed juice from the kitchen. "Big sister’s here, and she’s made some of mother’s hangover cure for you. Hmph, didn’t think you’d need *this* for a few more years yet." She shot Twilight another dirty look. "Hopefully, we’ve all learned a valuable lesson." Rarity sighed and glared at Alisa. "I know we’re trusting you to educate Sweetie in her unusual magical affinity, but why that spell?" Alisa dipped her ears a bit, but she didn’t look away from Rarity’s glare. "Should Alisa teach Sweetie to cast mind corruption instead? Soul binding? Greatest fear spell? Dark magic like that’s not safe, oh no, especially not for pups and fillies! If there’s painful lessons to learn, better she’s learning them with Shadow Clone!" Then Alisa fixed Twilight with an unamused, predatory stare. "You interfered with Alisa’s student, put her in danger. There will be punishment." Twilight blinked. "But, I’m a Princess. I have a school to run. You can’t just…" A small wolf, dark gray with purple shades in her coat, bowed to a customer from behind the counter of Alisa’s jewelry shop in Icehome. "Thank you for purchase! Are you needing a receipt?" The zipper of Twilight’s wolf costume gave her a mild shock, making the "wolf" yelp and whine. "Speak properly, ‘Roksana!’" Alisa whispered smugly. "S-sorry, mistress!" said Twilight, glad that the costume covered her furious blushing. "Are you needing receipt?" Iosef grinned and wagged his tail. "Roksana’s really cute. Maybe she’s helping me with other things later?" Alisa waggled a claw. "Oh, sorry, she’s temporary employee. She won’t be here to go on dates, can’t do it… unless she really wants to!" Twilight gritted her teeth. "Just four more hours of ‘punishment’ to go… I can do this…" Session 94.23 Kendell2 Twilight decided that since she'd built her castle (which turned out to be a very good idea given it fended off the Raid), she'd need another build. She did have her villager 'apartment building' to finish, but it was more for practicality than to look cool. So she decided to build an underwater base. After all, the new Conduit introduced made it possible to make one without dealing with removing all the water and she'd lucked out and gotten a Wandering Trader spawning nearby with the Nautilus Shells on sell and got most of them and just lucked out fishing, so she only needed to hunt down a couple Drowned with them. And she had a bunch of treasure maps that gave her a lot of exploration options. Soon enough she had the proper materials to make the Conduit...except for the Prismarine to actually power it, and the only real way to get that was from the Ocean Monument. She wanted to just dive down into a ravine where one of the pillars coming down from the Monument into it...but found to her frustration the Elder's mining fatigue status went down far enough to effect her down there. "Looks like I'll have to go in..." she muttered. She had water breathing potions left, so she simply went in to hunt them and killed two fairly easily...but couldn't find the last one and drowned when she ran out of potions. So she went back with new potions...and still couldn't find it until she was down to her last potion... "...Wait..." she said, floating at the entrance...and looked up to find a passage way up to where the Elder Guardian was. Twilight paused the game, walked over, and slammed her head against the wall. OOC: True story. Session 94.24 Mtangalion Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo barged into Twilight’s Sitting Room, then slammed the door shut, gasping for breath. "This is a complete disaster!" moaned Rainbow. Applejack sat up in her seat, distracted from the O&O game that Rainbow and Scootaloo had interrupted. "Uh, RD? What’s with the battle armor straight out of Pegasopolis?" Rainbow zoomed over to the window and looked down, armor rattling. "Custody battle." Applejack looked to Princess Twilight, who just shrugged. "Ah think y'all need a refresher course on what that actually means sugarcube." Curious, she went to the window to see what Dash was so worried about. "A custody battle ain’t a real… oh." Down on the lawn in front of the castle, Mane Allgood was also wearing traditional pegasus battle gear, training with very real and very sharp wingblades. They whistled as she spun and stabbed with them, cutting the air itself. Beside her, Snap Shutter snorted and pounded the ground with his hooves, looking like a stallion who was ready to go hoof to hoof with an angry rhino, gear or no gear. Twilight winced, joining them at the window. "How did this happen?" Rainbow sighed. "Okay, so… the judge gave me custody of Scootaloo, because her aunts left her living alone in an empty house in Ponyville for years. Nopony around Ponyville even knew them, because they hardly ever visited!" Scootaloo cringed. "I thought it was normal…" Rainbow nodded. "And then when the ink was barely dry on the adoption papers, Scootaloo’s real parents show up for a surprise visit!" "Can’t everypony just get along somehow?" fretted Scootaloo. "I mean, I barely even remember my real parents… but I’d like to know them. I just don’t want anypony getting hurt!" Rainbow rested a hoof on her shoulder. "I know, squirt… if only we could just turn into dragons or something, and disappear!" Someone pushed a chair back from the table and stood, and Rainbow suddenly realized who else had been playing O&O. Garble, and… Dragon Lord Ember?! "Well, that's a lot to ask," grumbled Ember, "but I suppose you’re a big enough hero and friend of dragons to have earned it." She grabbed the Bloodstone Scepter leaning against the table. "Here you go." "Wait!" shouted Dash. "I was just... Ah!" Ruby light blasted Scootaloo and Rainbow. Equine bodies stretched and grew, rising into bipedal stances. Fur and manes shed and stone-hard scales and horns and claws grew… and just like that, Rainbow Dash was a sapphire teenage dragoness.... And Scootaloo was an amber baby dragoness, whose leathery wings began to twitch and flap, lifting her into the air! "D-Dash! My wings! They work!" "Y’all realize, this is just gonna make a bigger mess!" shouted AJ… after Dash, who had already grabbed Scootaloo and swooped out the window. The door flew open and slammed shut a second time. "You gotta dragon me up and send me to the Dragon Lands too!" panted Gilda. "Everywhere I go, griffons keep agreeing with whatever I say! They want me to be the new feathering queen of Griffonstone! They won’t leave me alone, and neither will this stupid hunk of gold!" Gilda threw the Idol of Boreas out the window, then stalked over to the table, and did a double-take and screeched when she noticed that the Idol was now sitting right there on the table beside her, somehow. Ember shrugged and aimed the scepter, but the ruby went dark. "Huh. Looks like you can’t be a child of Tiamat even if I wanted to do that, griffon. You belong to a different god." "Like fudge I do! If Boreas wants me to be queen, he’ll have to catch me first!" Gilda grabbed the Idol and flew out the window herself. Dragon Lord Ember turned to Garble. "I suppose you want to return to the Dragon Lands as well." She waved the scepter. "There. Go, stay, do whatever you want. You've earned it." Garble fidgeted in his seat. "Um, thanks but… I've actually decided that I kind of like it here. Being ambassador, hanging with Spike, going to school and stuff…" Ember blinked. "But, living in a pony city! Don’t tell you actually *like* ponies now." Garble waved his claws. "Nah, it’s not that!" Grinning, he leaned towards Ember and whispered, "Indoor plumbing." Session 94.25 Ardashir "At least nopony else will know about this," Twilight/Roksana grumbled. The bell on the store door rang as she looked up from the cash register. "This is already humiliating enough -- ulp!" "What's wrong, fuzzy?" Gallus said as he looked around the Icehome store. He examined some of the silver and sapphire jewelry displayed under glass at the front counter. "Yeesh, I know Professor Rarity said she was testing our ingenuity by sending us on a scavenger hunt," he tapped a claw on the glass. "But for this? I think she just wants us to do some of her shopping for her." "Oh, Rarity would never do that -- Ow! I mean," Twilight rubbed along her zipper and quickly added as the Student Six looked at her in confusion, "Pony Mistress Rarity not use students that way, Pony Princess Twilight not let her! Roksana hear it from Mistress Rarity! Heh!" "Well, she totally did," Sandbar grumbled, looking at the list he held. "Made us go all the way to Canterlot first, then her shop in Manehattan, and then Icehome." He shrugged and revealed a heavy pouch filled with bits. "At least she and Counselor Starlight let us use the school funds for it." "She did WHAT?!? Ow!" She rubbed the zipper along her neck again. "Er, Roksana wants to be knowing just how good a piece of jewelry students will be needing." Ocellus pointed to one of the most expensive pieces in the store, a silver necklace inlaid with multiple sapphires. Prince Blueblood would have been proud to wear it. "Professor Rarity said to get the best. That looks like it." "Roksana will be getting it, and it costs," Twilight choked in fury at the price tag, "HOW MUCH? Do Rarity and Starlight think my school is made of bits -- OWW!" She shivered as little bolts of lightning played along her costume's fur. "Yona wants know if anyone else thinks ice dog clerk is acting funny," Yona muttered, eyeing 'Roksana' sidelong. "I don't see anything wrong." Smolder's drool stained the glass as she looked at the gemstones. They sparkled with icy beauty. Her eyes darkened and she began growing as she eyed the gems. "Smolder hungry! Smolder WANT!" Silverstream snatched up a water-filled bucket in a nearby corner under a sign reading 'In Case Of Greed-Growth Dragon, Thieving Griffon, or Still-Evil Changeling' and hurriedly dumped it over her. Smolder shuddered and returned to normal size. "Uh, yeah. Thanks. I needed that." She shook herself. "I guess." "It's okay," Gallus said as he handed over a pile of bits that made Twilight choke under her wolf suit. Taking the sapphire and silver necklace, he said as they left. "Hey, remember what happened in Canterlot. Starlight told us to eave enough behind to rebuild that store. It should be paid back in a few years, and she said Twilight was one of the, what was it, 'bloodsucking nobility exploiters' so she can cover it..." Their voices faded into the distance. And behind them Twilight-Roksana beat her head against the floor. *** And back in Ponyville at the Friendship School, Starlight smirked as she sat back in her chair and thought about the joke she was playing on her mentor. "That'll teach Twilight to go running off again and drop the school right in my lap without warning." Session 94.26 Unown3 (Spoilers for last Saturday's episode.). Having been put in charge of Canterlot while the Princesses took their vacation, the mane six were not having an ideal time of it. Ironically proving Twilight had been very right to panic at the idea of being thrusted into power with her friends, rather than being a worry wart as everypony had brushed her off as. But thankfully they'd managed to keep their heads above water thanks to some timely advice from Fancy Pants. In Princess Celestia's room Princess Twilight Sparkle, feeling dismayed at breaking Celestia and Luna's mysterious artifact for moving the sun and moon that somehow didn't drain Twilight of all her magic as the myth said supposedly happened... leaned against a random wall... and heard a click, and it opened inward... Twilight stepped inside, and found a pile of cakes frozen in time (of course), and a large table showing all of Equus... with chess pieces all made in the forms of herself, her friends, their enemies, creatures Twilight didn't recognize, and several ponies having been put into a discard box. Twilight quickly closed the door and pretended she had seen nothing. Session 94.27 sonicandmario826 Discord popped in, "If you thought that was weird you should see the other door." Discord pressed a hidden button on another wall revealing a door that was labeled generation fi-"NOPE!!!", Twilight quickly teleported away. Discord pouted, "Spoilsport." Session 94.28 Ardashir "And the wicked, nasty dragon falls at your hooves, slain!" Twilight said, sounding delighted. "Congratulations, ladies; you came up with a brilliant plan that time. Especially you, Fluttershy -- Fluttershy?" Fluttershy was about to jump up and cheer along with her friends when she got a mental image. She remembered the adorable little baby dragons she'd cuddled and helped to hatch in the Dragonlands. The way they'd looked at her with those wide innocent eyes, her desire to bring them back home and raise them. And in her mind's eye she saw herself, standing over their little hacked and spell-blasted bodies as they looked up at her and asked with their dying breath: "Mommy... Why..." A moment later Applejack and Rarity were comforting the sobbing Fluttershy. "Oh, you poor little darlings! I didn't mean it! It was just a game!" Fluttershy wept, rivers of tears streaming down her face as Rarity hugged her. "I'm a monster!" "Ya know," Rainbow Dash said, scratching her scales, "Ever since I got my, ah, makeover courtesy of Ember these kind of things are starting to feel funny ta me too. Not that kind of funny, Pinkie." "Uh, say, Dash, ain't ya supposed to have thet 'custody battle' soon?" Dash nodded at Applejack. "Yeah, well, the lawyers are still hashing it out. Apparently since Scoot an' me got dragonified they're tryin' ta figure if Equestrian law still covers her. An nopony can find Ember ta ask her how dragons handle this." She looked back at the game book, with its cover of heroic ponies slaying savage, vicious, drooling dragons. "I wonder how the dragons are taking it." "I just hope Big Brother's friends back in Canterlot aren't in more trouble," Twilight set the book away. "There are times when these games all seemed a lot simpler before we were making friends with everyone." And of course in Canterlot: "SO!" Ex-Dragon Lord Torch growled down at Gizmo and his two friends as they cowered in the palm of his claw. "YOU'RE THE PONY RACISTS WHO HATE DRAGONS, HUH?" He pointed at a billboard nearby advertising their latest game, 'Dragon Slayer'. Gizmo gulped and looked at his friends. "I told you we should have stuck with using evil Changelings instead!" Session 94.29 Grogar-the-oneser "TURN THAT GOTHIC MUSIC DOWN!" Luna snapped in the royal canterlot voice "YOU DON'T KNOW MY DARK SOUL!!" Celestia yelled across the room "I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY YOU LIKE THAT GOTH STUFF, IT SO DREARY! AND THIS IS COMING FROM A MARE, WHOSE JOB IS LITERALLY RAISING THE MOON!" Luna yelled back. "AT LEAST IT NOT EIGHTIES GARBAGE!" Celestia yelled back "OH THAT IS IT!" Luna snapped "WE ARE TAKING CARE OF THIS, THE ONLY WAY POSSIBLE!!" "Huh, was not expecting them to play tennis to see who gets to listen to there favorite music genre." A guard stated. "It's alot less destructive than the alternative." Another guard stated. Session 94.30 Mtangalion Princess Twilight floated the dice across the table. "It’s your turn, Rarity. Um… Rarity? Are you okay?" Rarity was leaning back and forth, oohing at the shifting colors of Rainbow’s faintly iridescent dragon scales. "Exquisite…" Rainbow Dash grinned smugly and rose, striking a pose with claws on hips. "Why don’t you take a picture, Rares? It’ll last longer." "That’s a brilliant idea," exclaimed Rarity, as if she had not just been shamelessly checking Rainbow out. "Although, now that I think of it... I’m a little surprised that you and Scootaloo are here in plain view, and not hiding out in the Dragon Lands." Rainbow chuckled, demonstrating that scales could blush just as well as fur, somehow. "Yeah, that didn’t work out…" "And they’ll never come looking for us here!" boasted Rainbow Dash, stretching out every muscle in her relaxing lava bath. "I mean, ferocious dragons, choking fumes, and deadly lava around every corner? Only ponies with nerves of steel could possibly…" There was a thwip, following by a whistling sound, then a yelp from Scootaloo. "Hey!" "G’day, love!" Mane Allgood set her wingbow aside and cheerfully started tying off the net that was somehow holding Scootaloo, despite the baby dragon grabbing the net and pulling, then slashing with her claws. Dash sat bolt upright, lava splashing, just in time to see Snap Shutter shoving a boulder… which fell, trailing a rope connected to a pulley… which yanked another net out of the lava bath and hauled Rainbow into the air. "How the heck!?" Rainbow bit the net, and even tried breathing flame on it, to no avail. "Magically coated tungsten-diamond fiber," Snap Shutter explained. "Never hunt dragons without it! Now, now, stop squirming, you lot!" He booped Rainbow’s snout, grinning darkly. "We wouldn’t want *you* to miss your court date." Rainbow shrugged. "Yeah… probably for the best. I can’t do Wonderbolts shows when I’m in hiding." Rarity gasped. "Oh my! You’ll need a new Wonderbolts uniform!" She whipped out a notepad and immediately began sketching. Dash sighed, slumping. "*If* I’m in any shows. I can’t do a Rainboom like this… I just couldn’t go fast enough!" "Well, you *are* a flying armored tank now," mused Spike. "So what?" exclaimed Scootaloo, sitting next to Spike, and breathing a spout of flame in her excitement. "You just need some new tricks!" Garble snorted, shaking his head. "That whole ‘custody’ thing sounds stupid. Whelps belong with whatever dragon gives enough of a crap to take care of them, right?" Twilight cleared her throat loudly. "Okay, okay, whatever creature! Happy now?" Rainbow Dash scratched her head fins. "Would it be totally crazy to bring Garble to the hearing as a character witness?" Garble flew over and stood toe to toe with Rainbow, only a little taller than her since her change. "Maybe I will… if you make it worth my while, ‘Crash!’ You still owe me a gorge board race, now that you’re not a weakling pony who’d burn up if she wiped out." Rainbow grinned, jabbing Garble’s chest with a claw. "I can’t leave Ponyville right now, but if Starlight and Twilight can whip up a lava slide? You’re on!"