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// Part 4: Organics Are Weird 
// Story: S.P.A.R.K.S. 
// by Cardinal Dan Productions 
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Outside the Carousel Boutique, Sparks absentmindedly watched a pair of squirrels chase each other up and down the trunk of a tree while Spike thought of where they should go next on their little tour. It was almost noon, now, and there was still too much of the town left to cover in a single day. Plus, there was the growing issue of his appetite. It was about lunch time, and the little dragon was getting hungry.

Sparks must have been able to sense it, because she forgot about the critters she had been watching and turned to face him with a concerned look in her eyes. “Spike, you require sustenance. We must procure something nutritious.”

“Sparks, I’m fine. It’s alright, really...” He tried to dismiss her concerns, but the appropriately timed growling of his stomach only solidified her stance.

“Negative, Spike.” In an instant, he was swept up in her orange cloud and carried towards the road. “I suggest returning to the palace of Twilight Sparkle or finding an eating establishment here in Ponyville. Which would you prefer?”

Spike shot her a cold stare and folded his arms across his chest. “Well, first, I’d prefer to be put down...”

Sparks, frowned and gently set him back on the ground. “My apologies, Spike. I only wish to see you taken care of, just as you are caring for me, but it seems that no matter what I do, I only cause you discomfort...” Her ears folded back, and she even looked ashamed of herself.

“No, Sparks...” He quickly shook his head and took up one of her hooves in his hands. “You’re wonderful. I can’t remember the last time I’ve had so much fun in such a short amount of time. You’re constantly learning new things, and I’m amazed with the progress you’ve made since I found you this morning.”

She looked surprised as he held her hoof, and her ears perked up. “Spike...” He wasn’t sure if it was possible for her to blush, but it sure looked like she was. “You... I... I do not...” She began to twitch, and her visor flickered. “Systems error... Systems error...” Then, she shut down completely.

Spike’s chest twisted into a knot. “Oh, Celestia... What did I do?” Sparks was completely unresponsive, standing motionless with her head hanging low and her visor now black and opaque. “Oh, no... Twilight’s gonna kill me...” He set her hoof down and touched the side of her face. “Sparks? Sparks, are you alright? Oh, Celestia, please be alright...”

Just as he was about to consider carrying her back to the palace, her visor flickered back to life, returning to its transparent orange glow. Sparks turned her head to the left and right and began to recite what sounded like a user’s operations manual. “Testing gyroscopic motor functions... Data logs: restored, Recent memory logs: resorted, long-term memory logs: restored.” Then, her gaze landed on Spike, and her lips curled into a smile. “My apologizes, Spike. I experienced an unknown error when you held my hoof... The cause of the shutdown is unknown, but I am running tests and troubleshooting my responsive systems to find those responsible. I hope I did not frighten you.”

Spike was relieved to see her back online, overjoyed even. “No... I’m just glad you’re alright...” He let out a long sigh. “Come on. Let’s find someplace to eat.”

She nodded in agreement. “Very well, Spike. I will follow your lead.”

Together, they left Rarity’s place behind and headed further into town, straight for the square where the mayor’s office resided. There, numerous eateries operated all throughout the day, including Sugarcube Corner, Ponyville’s most popular bakery. Sparks eyed the bakery as they walked past. “My memory stores tell me that another one of Twilight Sparkle’s friends is employed here.”

Spike saw where she was looking and nodded his head. “Huh? Oh, yeah. Pinkie Pie runs the bakery with Mr. and Mrs. Cake. Did you want to go inside and meet them?”

The artificial mare shook her head slowly and kept walking. “Negative, Spike. Your health and well being must come first. Right now, you require nutritious food. My research can wait. Scanning...” She turned in a circle, performing a full three hundred and sixty degree spin as she observed all of the surrounding restaurants. She eventually came to a stop while looking at a little outdoor pavilion. There were places to sit inside, but her gaze was fixed on one of the outdoor tables. “There... This establishment will do.”

She lead him to the table she had her eyes on, and the two of them sat down. Ponies at a neighboring table gave them some strange looks, but neither said anything. Spike just tried to ignore them, keeping his attention focused on Sparks.

He found her to be increasingly distracting, but at the same time, so fascinating to look at. She looked incredible in the gown Rarity crafted for her, but what he enjoyed the most were her expressions, they way she peered at the menu in front of her. It was like every little thing confused her, causing her to frown in the most adorable way. He couldn’t help chuckling at her. “Hmm... Are you hungry too, Sparks?”

She looked up from the menu and shook her head. “Negative, Spike. Of course not... I have no need to consume food and water like you. I am merely browsing for you. I thought you might be interested in this...” She placed the menu on the table and passed it towards him.

Spike saw where she was pointing. It was a hay burger with a salad on the side, nothing too fancy but filling enough. The little dragon would have just soon as preferred an amethyst or a garnet, but he knew deep down that Sparks was right about him needing a proper meal this time.

A unicorn waiter arrived shortly after with a notepad and pen levitating within her magical cloud. “Well, good afternoon! I’m Azalea, and I’ll be serving you today. Now, what can I get such a lovely couple, any drinks to start off with?”

Spike’s cheeks felt hot as the waiter’s words echoed in his mind, and across the table, Sparks whimpered softly as she twitched ever so subtly in her seat. “Error... Error... Error...”

The waiter offered her a concerned look. “Is... she alright?”

He waved her question away in an attempt to keep her focus on him, not Sparks. “She’s fine. It’s just a little chilly today... Um... She’s not really all that hungry, but I’ll have this hay burger and salad. Oh, and some water, please.”

After jotting down his request on her note pad, she gave him a short bow and a smile. “Of course. I’ll return with your food shortly.” Then, she vanished into the eatery.

When she was out of sight, Spike turned back to look at Sparks, who looked like she on the verge of another crash. “Hey...” He reached across the table and held one of her hooves. “Hey, Sparks... What’s the matter?”

Her visor flickered some more, and she looked directly at him. She looked as though she had just come out of a trance. “Unknown systems error... I... I do not know what is wrong with me...” She looked frightened and embarrassed. “Spike, that mare called us a... a couple...”

He held onto her hoof and squeezed it reassuringly. “She didn’t mean anything by it, Sparks. I’m sure she was just being friendly. Couples eat here all the time.”

That didn’t seem to set her at ease. “I’m experiencing strange feelings that I do not understand, Spike... When I look into your eyes, I can see my own reflection looking back at me. My internal hardware feels unsettled, and my primary systems corrupt.” She looked like she was on the verge of what could only be described as a panic attack. “I do not know if what I am feeling was programmed by Twilight Sparkle or something else, my own experiences...”

She paused briefly and looked down at the table, at his hand which still rested on her hoof. Then, she looked back up, meeting Spike’s gaze with her own. “Spike, I have an urgent inquiry...”

Spike would be lying if he said he wasn’t concerned about her right now. In the moment, he strongly considered forgetting about the restaurant and taking her back to the palace. Maybe she had taken in too much new data in such a short amount of time that she had overloaded herself. “Sure, Sparks... Anything.”

Her visor flickered as though she were reading some of her data stores. “Couple. Dictionary definition: Two individuals who are married, engaged, or otherwise closely associated romantically or sexually.” Then, the flickering stopped. “Spike, are we a couple?”

The question swept him off of his feet, and he felt his heart leap into his throat as his mind scrambled to formulate an answer. “I... I don’t know.” He began to sweat profusely. “Couples usually know each other and date for a while, or... What I’m trying to say is, You’re really great, but I don’t think we’re really a couple...”

Sparks nodded softly, like it was the answer she had been expecting, but then, when Spike thought the issue was behind them, she opened up her mouth and asked a new question that left him feeling like his chest had been hit with a hammer. “Spike, would you like to be a couple?”


***Up Next: Wired In Parallel***