//------------------------------// // Poker Night, Meet Wolfgang // Story: Returning Survivor // by Itchy //------------------------------// Mecha sighed, as he prepared his last experiment. He'd been trying to work with the hydra scales for a while now, and was going to be late for his lunch with Big Macintosh and Doctor Whooves. Sighing, he glanced at the dust he had in the container, all that remained of a scale after soaking it in acid for an hour and letting it dry. Looking back at his smelter, he shrugged before pushing it it, not sure what to expect. BOOM! But it wasn't the explosion that occurred. Nor did he expect to fly through the air. Sighing, he relaxed his muscles as he flew, thinking that it was just the tiniest bit overrated. After twenty seconds of flight, he hit the ground, causing him to flip over himself, going over a fence, and into his normal seat at the cafe. Blinking, he looked at Big Macintosh and Doctor Whooves, both of whom were holding signs, with Doctor Whooves holding a 9.4 and Big Macintosh holding a 9.7. Shaking his head, he noticed the two were staring at his head, and asked, “What?” Pointing at his head, Doctor Whooves replied, “Your mane is on fire.” Blinking, Mecha reached up and flattened his mane with his mechanical hoof. After a few moments, he took it off, and asked, “Did I get it?” Nodding his head, Big Macintosh said, “Eeyup.” Curiosity visible on his face, Doctor Whooves asked, “So what did you do, since I thought I was the only pony that did experiments that potentiality explode?” Mecha shook his head and said, “Heated up some hydra scale powder. Apparently, it's highly flammable and explosive.” Nodding his head, Doctor Whooves replied, “That makes sense, most of my explosions start with a powder of some sort as well. How much did you use?” Thinking back, Mecha said, “Maybe thirty grams worth.” “What were ya trying to do?” Big Macintosh asked. “Make it workable,” Mecha replied. “Thought I may have a process to convert the scale into something workable, but apparently I didn't. And I think that I may have to build a new forge,” he added, looking in the general direction of his home. “This isn't going to effect poker night, is it?” Doctor Whooves asked. “It shouldn't,” Mecha told him. LINEBREAKER Mecha stared at what remained of his forge, an anvil. Well, the only thing that remained and was in the same place as before. Eye twitching, he did some mental math, and concluded that re-building it would cost around 20,000 bits, almost the entirety of the profit from the statues that he'd made for the palace. Deciding that he'd need to vent some steam, he went into his house and grabbed his swords, before walking to the Everfree Forest. Stopping in a clearing not to far in, Mecha picked a tree and walked up to it. Pulling out his blades, he took a deep breath, before letting out a psychotic scream, and started to slash and hack it. Maybe he hadn't recovered as completely as he thought mentally from his experience of being abused in a storm by a tree... LINEBREAKER Taking in a very deep breath, Mecha looked at the tree he'd spent the last hour or so hacking at. Well, pile of firewood would be a better description, considering that nothing remained of the original tree, besides the stump. Despite this, Mecha was in a much better mood, and so sat down on the stump while putting his blades away, saying to himself, “That was highly therapeutic. I should do that more often!” Smiling to himself, his thoughts were interrupted when he heard a whimper coming from a nearby bush. Pulling out one of his swords for safety, he pulled the bush aside to see an injured timberwolf cub licking what seemed to be the corpse of its mother. Caught off guard, Mecha stared at the sight before him, not quite grasping the situation. After a minute, the cub stopped licking its dead mother, and turned to Mecha. Whimpering, it nuzzled its mother again, before walking up to Mecha, and looking up to face him. “What?” he asked the cub, unsure as to what it wanted. He got his answer when the cub nuzzled his leg, looking back at him. Eyes widening, Mecha said, “Oh no! No no no! Not going to happen, try again later, nein!” Letting out a heart shattering whimper, the cub sat on its hind legs, giving him a sad look, eyes widening. Mecha began to break, saying, “How would I... that is to say... but I... Oh by Sloth's hammock, alright all ready, I give up! Just please, stop staring at me with those Envy forsaken eyes okay!” The cub brightened immediately, jumping up and yipping with joy. Realizing that he'd been duped, Mecha's eye twitched as he walked home, cub on his tail, muttering, “How do I end up in these situations?” LINEBREAKER Mecha sat on his couch, watching the pup walk around the room, sniffing everything, occasionally licking the wooden items in his house, baffling Mecha as to why he'd do that. He got his answer when the cub bit into the grandfather clock that Doctor Whooves had given to him as a sorry your forge blew up gift. “Hey!” Mecha shouted to the cub, “That's not food!” Seeing the hurt expression on the cubs face, he felt guilty for yelling at the cub. “Look,” he started, “I'm sorry for yelling, but that was a gift. If you're hungry, I have some extra... wood... laying around... I'm sorry, but you actually eat wood?” Nodding its head, the cub barked excitedly. Sighing, Mecha walked over to his unused fireplace, and grabbed a couple of logs, before tossing them next to the cub, saying, “Help yourself buddy.” Yipping in joy, the cub dug right in, ripping the bark off and swallowing it in seconds, moving onto the core of the logs. Sitting back down on the couch, Mecha looked at the timberwolf cub that was now his charge, and said, “You need a name.” The cub looked up from its meal for a moment, and gave Mecha a 'no duh,' look. “It's frightening that you can understand me as well as you do. Back to the name thing though... Um.... I got nothing.” Taking one last bite out of the log, the little cub walked up to the couch, and jumped on top of it, before laying down next to Mecha. Staring straight into his eyes, he all but told Mecha to hurry up and name him. Sighing, Mecha thought long and hard, before finally suggesting, “Wolfgang?” Giving him a look that said, 'really man?' the cub quirked an eye. Shrugging, Mecha said, “It's that or I just call you dog. I figured you'd prefer Wolfgang.” The cub turned its head, as if debating the choice. After a minute, the cub yipped, agreeing to the name. “Great,” Mecha said to the newly named Wolfgang. “Now, I just need to take you to Fluttershy to make sure you're in good health! ...After poker night that is.” Yipping in laughter, Wolfgang got up and started to run around the house. LINEBREAKER Opening his door after hearing some knocking, Mecha was greeted by Shining Armor saying, “Mecha! Good to see you again!” Chuckling, Mecha let him and Solaris in, whilst Solaris said, “It's good to see ya under less taxing conditions!” Shaking his head, Mecha replied, “That it is my friend, that it is.” Stepping into the poker room, Shining Armor said, “We should due something like this more... is that a timberwolf cub?” Glancing at where he was pointing, Mecha watched as Wolfgang ran around the legs of the table, chairs, Big Macintosh, and Doctor Whooves. “Yeah,” Mecha replied. “His name is Wolfgang. As long as you're not made of wood, he doesn't bite.” “Is that what happened to the clock I gave you?” Doctor Whooves asked, as the five friends sat down to play. “Yep. And my bed. And my pantry door. And my favorite chair. Little guy doesn't realize that he can just eat the wood next to my fireplace,” Mecha said. Glancing at smirking Wolfgang, Solaris said, “That, or he enjoys tormenting you.” “Yeah, that's also a possibility,” Mecha replied. LINEBREAKER “Sooo.... Big M.... how's it feel to be dating a model?” Mecha asked a couple hours later. “Terrible!” Big Macintosh replied. “While she hasn't changed due ta fame, that rotten apple Photo Finish won't let me and her spend time together!” “Whoa!” Solaris interrupted, “Big Macintosh is trash taking someone, and a mare at that!?! How much have you had to drink?” Looking at his pile of bottles, Big Macintosh replied, “Not enough. Ah just want to forget about the modeling thing and play poker! …and maybe get drunk enough to help either you or Shining Armor with girl problems.” Looking between the two mentioned ponies, Doctor Whooves said, “Yeah, which one of you two is it going to be?” “I've only just met the only mare I'd consider asking,” Shining Armor responded, “So it's Solaris's turn.” Blinking, Solaris looked at his pile of bottles and said, “Yeah... no go on that at the moment. I haven't drank enough yet...” Shrugging, Mecha dealt the next hand and replied, “We have all night, or at least, until we run out of drinks...” LINEBREAKER Stumbling out of the house, the friends started walking in a random direction, chatting about nothing, literally. Upon arriving in town square, Mecha turned to Solaris, and said, “So who is the lucky mare...? After all, we need to know where to stumble!” Nodding his head, Solaris replied, “Well, she doesn't live in Ponyville, so you wouldn't know her.” Blinking, Mecha said, “If she doesn't live here, then what are we doing here!” Quirking his head, Solaris said, “I don't know?” Doctor Whooves spoke up, saying, “Just teleport us to her already!” “Would that even be safe?” Big Macintosh asked, leaning on Shining Armor for support. “I dunno,” Shining Armor replied. “No unicorn has tried to teleport drunk... you up for it Solaris?” Getting a cross eyed look, Solaris thought hard before smiling and saying, “Yep!” and cast the spell, enveloping the five in a flash of light. When they could see again, they looked around, with Mecha saying, “Dude, are you planning on asking out Zecora?” Blinking, Solaris yelled out, “No! Dude, why would you even put that thought in my head?! She's nice and all from the sounds of it, but I've never met her!” Big Macintosh replied for Mecha, saying, “Cause you put us on top of her hut.” Caught off guard, Solaris looked down to see that they were in fact standing on top of Zecora's hut. “That,” he said, “is not my fault.” And with another flash, they teleported once more, this time to an open filed with bleachers lined up next to it. Frowning, Mecha said, “This looks familiar.” Shrugging his shoulders, Solaris said, “It's the only place I know she'd be near at this time.” Shaking off the feeling of familiarity that he had, Mecha signaled Solaris to lead the way. Glancing at the tents that everypony else had missed, Solaris started to walk towards what appeared to be the only tent lit up. Following him, Mecha had to drag Big Macintosh with him, while Shining Armor and Doctor Whooves followed while holding two entirely different conversations with each other. Upon entering the tent, Mecha realized why everything looked familiar when he spotted one figure. “Shine Sight! Bro, how you doin'?” Startled by his brothers sudden appearance, Shine Sight began to walk over. Standing just under Mecha's height, Shine Sight was a white unicorn, with a purple mane, white eyes that made it so that his pupils were the only visible color in them, and his Cutie Mark was that of a monocle. Walking up to Mecha, he said, “Mecha, what a surprise! What are you here for?” Swaying, Mecha pointed to Solaris, saying, “This lug brought me here cause he wanted to ask some mare out...” Turning to watch Solaris, the two brothers ignores the still chattering Doctor Whooves and Shining Armor, as well as the now spinning Big Macintosh. Solaris stumbled as he walked up to the only mare currently in the room, before giving her a tap on the shoulder. The mare turned, and expressed shock, and familiarity with Solaris. “Apparently,” Shine Sight said, “he knows Spitfire.” “Is that who he's asking out?” Mecha asked, getting his answer from the mare shouting out, “YES! You finally asked!” before she tackled Solaris with a hug, knocking him out. Blinking, Mecha turned to his brother, and said, “That's my cue to pass out,” before he turned and took two steps before doing so. Shine Sight sighed, before turning to the three... make that two, as Big Macintosh finally succumbed to the excessive spinning and collapsed onto the ground, remaining drunks. “The main issue,” Doctor Whooves said to Shining Armor, ignoring the fact that he wasn't paying attention to him, “is that people think time is linear. It's not! It's more of a wibbly wobbly thing.” As if to demonstrate his point, he stood on his hind legs while waving his forelegs in the air. While he did this, he didn't realize that he was slowly tipping back words, until he flat out fell and hit his head on a nearby bench. Shining Armor, having slowly shifting his focus until he stopped on Shine Sight, was still talking about the same thing he was talking to Doctor Whooves about, “So the bunnies would work as artillery, and the gold fish as arrows! We'd save a fortune and-” only to be cut off when Shine Sight hit him on the head with a potted plant. Shaking his head, Shine Sight turned back to talk with Soarin', muttering, “He had to start up poker night, didn't he?”