Rainbow Dash: Movies make a great distraction and all, but sooner or later, things hit home. And there's only so much a pony can take.
Fastest Fall in Equestria
Back To Life
So yeah, the Indiana Jones movies were pretty awesome. I don't see what the big deal about the fourth one was. It was cool! I don't know if you guys are aware, but if I crash into something right when I do a sonic rainboom, it makes a cloud just like that one after the big chase near the beginning, only all rainbow colored and even awesomer! And I'm pretty darn sure a big metal fridge would be protection against that, since AJ and Twilight were just fine in a nearby ditch.
But Dave went all bonkers about it, yelling "OH COME ON" at the screen every few minutes. I mean, he didn't have a problem when that dude with the skull on his head yanked someone's heart out through their ribcage and held it up while the dude he did it to was somehow still alive, but the whole "surviving an explosion in a metal box" thing was too much? And then there was the whole "gods are aliens" thing which makes perfect sense to me. Is there anything more alien than a god? But he flipped out over that, too.
But after the movies were over, it was my turn to flip out.
Because after the movies were over, I realized that the sun had set, and I was still stuck, having spent an entire day in an alien body in an alien world... and who knew when I was getting back?
Dave was pretty cool about it. He caught me staring out the window, but he didn't pressure me.
"You okay?"
I grunted - it was the most I could bring myself to do.
"Want to talk about it?"
I shook my head. All I wanted to do was go home. Talking wouldn't get me home. It would just remind me I wasn't there.
He patted me on the shoulder. "All right," he said. "But if you change your mind, I'm here."
I nodded. He settled down to watch some weird cartoon about baby birds (that's what a chick is, right?) that like robots with trucks for heads or something, I don't know, and I just stared into space for a bit.
"It's just," I said, then trailed off.
"Go on," he said, turning off the sound.
"It's been all day and not only am I still stuck here, still a freaky alien monkey thing, still male which is weirder than heck, but I haven't even heard from the girls! What if they don't know I'm gone? What if your friend... what if he got hurt and has amnesia and they think it's still me only with amnesia, and they never figure out it's not me?"
Dave started to speak, but I kept going.
"What if he doesn't have amnesia, but they think I've gone loco in the coco and have me put away? They have these rooms with clouds stuck to the walls where they stick ponies who might hurt themselves or others, and they use all kinds of magic on them to make them better, but Twilight says the magic they use is really dangerous and if they ever used it on someone who wasn't crazy it might make them crazy, or even worse!"
Dave just stared. I was in full swing now, rattling off worries like Pinkie Pie telling a story.
"And even if they don't think he's crazy, what if they think he's some kind of monster, like a changeling or something, and they lock him up forever and ever? And even if they don't do that, who's to say they'll be able to switch us back, or even find me?"
Dave grinned. "Shall I tackle these one by one?" he asked.
"If you think you're the big expert on my friends," I snapped, "then maybe you should think again!"
He grinned. "Hey, I'm just gonna ask a few questions. You're freaking out. Like big time, like you did at the Best Young Fliers' competition. Dude, your pupils are dilated all to hell and back. So take a few breaths and we'll figure this thing out, okay?"
I clenched my hands into fists - it's not like humans have claws like dragons or gryphons or anything - and took a few breaths. "Okay," I said. "But make it good."
"Okay," he said, "so starting from the beginning: What if Mike has amnesia? I doubt it. The only way he could get amnesia by hitting his head is if he hit it hard enough to get brain damage. And as fast as you can fly, you've taken tons of spills without forgetting a thing, right?"
I didn't want to acknowledge the "tons of spills" part, but he'd seen enough of me in action to know that the crashes are the result of experimenting rather than incompetence, so I let it slide. "I guess... But--"
"So the next option: what if they think he's you only crazy? Well, what did you guys do when you thought Pinkie Pie had gone nuts?"
"We... talked to her."
"Uh-huh," he said.
"And we convinced her that we really did want to be her friends, and we didn't hate her."
"Yeah..."
"And she snapped out of it."
"Right," he said. "Which brings us to your next big what-if: what if they do realize he's not you, but think he's a monster or something?"
I nodded. "Yeah."
"That's probably most likely out of all of them," he said, "but that doesn't make it likely. I mean, you and your friends are pretty much the exemplars of what makes a friend a friend. No, strike that 'pretty much', that's what you are. Can you see Twilight Sparkle passing up an opportunity to learn about a whole other world? Or Pinkie Pie missing an opportunity for a party? Or Fluttershy failing to give somepony the benefit of the doubt? Especially after you guys learned your lesson with Zecora?"
I shook my head. "No," I said. "Applejack might be a problem, or she might not. Once that bonehead learns a lesson, it stays learned."
"Bonehead?"
I nodded. "Oh yeah, we're two of a kind that way. Stubborn and kinda dense."
"Okay, so the last one. It's possible," he said, "I have to admit, that your friends will do everything they can to bring you back and just plain fail, but..."
I blinked, looking over at him, not quite daring to hope, but not wanting to give up either. "But?"
"Can you see Twilight Sparkle failing to do something she sets out to do? Something to do with magic? Ever? Like, ever ever?"
I laughed. "Never ever ever ever," I said.
"Right," he said. "So it might take time, but I doubt it. After all, even if Twilight can't figure it out, she can always write a letter, can't she?"
I grinned. "Dear Princess Celestia," I said, "I kind of lost Rainbow Dash. Your Faithful Student, Twilight Sparkle. P.S.: Mike is the new Rainbow Dash."
He laughed. "Feel better?" he asked.
"Kind of," I said. "But..."
"But what?"
I frowned. "No," I said. "It's weird."
He put his hands on his hips. "Spit it out, Rainbow," he said.
"I... I kinda need a hug," I said in a quiet voice.
He grinned, and spread his arms. I don't know how long he held me while I got over the shakes. Could have been minutes or more, but it felt like forever before we were interrupted by a sarcastic -- and very familiar -- voice.