//------------------------------//
// Keep Going, Maybe 
// Story: The Olden World 
// by Czar_Yoshi 
//------------------------------//

"Hey girls," Valey greeted, slouching down the stairs of the Immortal Dream two hours before sundown. "I'm home."

Shinespark immediately looked up from a textbook in the library, folding her ears. "Where were you? I came to watch you, but couldn't find you after to see you home."

Valey winced. "Oh. Uh, you were? Bananas, I went to hang out with Senescey and Felicity for a while..."

"As long as it was enjoyable." Shinespark shrugged, settling back into her seat. "I'm to get more work done on Nyala. As much as I hate to admit it, rebuilding Braen isn't likely to be an option, but at the very least I want to get her wheels before the week is done. That should be a reachable goal."

"Yeah... Wish I could do more for her myself." Valey glanced away. "She's my sister. Is. Was. I dunno. All I can do is fight and flirt with things."

Shinespark nodded slowly. "Must have been hard to walk out on the tournament if that's all you can really do."

Valey winced. "You know what I mean."

"Do I?" Shinespark raised an eyebrow.

Valey hesitated. "Look, I haven't exactly made it secret that I kinda don't want to go on. This whole week, I've been, like... you know. If you had something to say about it, you really wanted to wait until now?"

"Hey, I've had Izvaldi on my mind," Shinespark protested, though there was no force in her voice. "Anyway. Had a fun time at Senescey and Felicity's?"

"Uh, sorta?" Valey tilted her head. "Look, I feel like there's something you're dancing around..."

Shinespark sighed and sat up. "Alright, fine. Ever since Mistvale, you've seemed... not quite alright. Maybe it was meeting the Night Mother, but it could have been what happened in that valley with Harshwater and Grenada, too. Did anything happen back there? Because you once threw yourself at impossible challenges without a clear reward, just because of your heart, and part of that fire feels like it's gone out."

"I, uh." Valey stared at her nose for a second. "I mean, the Night Mother did kind of confirm some of my worst fears about myself. And gave me a lot of answers I spent a lot of time looking for. So... now I don't need to look for them, I guess?"

Shinespark didn't look satisfied. "And are you happy with this?"

"Happy with what?" Valey shrugged.

"Alright." Shinespark stood up. "If that's what you say. I wasn't there and didn't hear what she said for myself. Maybe the Night Mother gave you a very convincing reason to sit back and stop being an ambitious daredevil. I just... never mind."

Valey narrowed her eyes. "Nah, you've got something on your mind. What's up?"

"...This could be crazy." Shinespark took a deep breath. "But did anything happen down in that valley, when you were cut off from us, between you and Felicity?"

"Between the two of us?" Valey blinked. "Why? What's that have to do with anything? I mean, sure, we talked, and I was a little suspicious of her, but we wound up making friends."

"This is a crazy theory," Shinespark admitted, "and probably paranoid. But remember when we talked with Felicity about..." She trailed off, blinking. "No, that was while you were in Gyre. You wouldn't remember. Felicity was explaining to us how Mistvale Monk arts work. She thought there might have been a similarity between them and how that strange sword Starlight has works. And I borrowed that sword months ago when we were on the pirate ship, and when it's used on batponies... instead of paralyzing them, it made them give up. It lowered their will to do anything, and eventually turned them to ash. Do you see where I'm going with this?"

Valey's face scrunched in thought. "I'm pretty sure I haven't been stabbed by that thing, if that's what you're asking. Bananas, I'm pretty sure it hasn't left the wall in Starlight's room since that sea cave."

Shinespark hesitated, winced... and said, "I'm worried that this is something to do with Felicity."

"Wait, what?" Valey's jaw dropped slightly. "You mean she's using weird monk arts on me, or something? Nah, she wouldn't do that."

"How sure are you?" Shinespark's earnestness returned. "We treated her as our guest while she was here, but you two have been alone together more than... More than a little. The first time in that valley, and you visited her a lot while she was recuperating. Now you go to her house instead of here after the tournament, and I know you two were doing something after we told her about Izvaldi. Something I was only comfortable doing because you endorsed the idea, by the way, and I'm still not sure how I feel having done it."

Valey blinked. "Wait a sec, you sound almost jealous..."

Shinespark scowled. "This has nothing to do with the fact that both of you are batponies and I'm a unicorn. It's that I'm worried about you and you seem to be getting way too involved someone dangerously high up in the Empire's political system who has unknown powers and abilities to influence ponies and you look like you're being influenced!"

"Alright, hold up." Valey took a heavy step forward. "You wanna know who else was dangerously high up in some shifty political system, completely untrustworthy and with weird powers and abilities to influence ponies? Me. Felicity is exactly where I was, right down to having some stuff seriously wrong with her body that weighs heavily on her, kinda like how mine belongs to someone else. I feel for her hard. All her sisters, but her especially. You guys gave me a stupid number of chances, and I know how dumb that was, but it really changed my life. So I know exactly how much she could benefit from the same."

Shinespark shook her head. "Trust and second chances aren't magic."

"Well?" Valey shrugged. "I guess you could have fooled me." She stared at the bookshelves for a moment. "So where does that leave things now?"

"With respect to what?" Shinespark finally set her book aside. "Maybe I take your word on Felicity, but I'm still..." Her words fell off, leaving her with nothing to say, and she sighed. "Would you believe me if I said I missed Ironridge? The way things used to be before all this happened?"

"Bananas, yeah." Valey flopped into a chair next to her. "You had it good, didn't you?"

"I was talking about you," Shinespark said without making eye contact. "Remember the fruit-stealing thorn in my flank who acted the fool, thought everything was hilarious and found out all my plans without bothering to foil them?"

Valey blinked. "Yeah, that was me. What are you talking about?"

"I don't know." Shinespark shook her head. "I guess I just miss seeing you that happy. I don't know what it was that broke you or wore you down. Probably everything."

"Alright, seriously." Valey narrowed her eyes. "Are you saying you prefer me insulting you, annoying you, laughing at you and ripping you off to me not doing all that? I can't tell, because I think you just said you did."

"I didn't say you weren't annoying," Shinespark countered, looking down. "Just that you were so much happier like that. I was happier too, even with all my responsibilities, up until it ended. And now look at us. It's like this ship was poisoned with the weight of Ironridge and we weren't able to get away after all."

"I wasn't happy." Valey's face darkened. "I was lying to myself about how much cooler my place was than the alternative. And before you tell me otherwise, I know I'm not fine now, either. I just dunno where to go from here."

"Is winning the tournament and wishing Garsheeva would build airships to trade with Ironridge too much to ask for?" Shinespark asked. "And then we could... go back home?" An unspoken And things could go back to the way they used to be lingered at the end of her words.

Valey sighed and looked away. "Win the tournament? Sure, I can do that. Bananas, you all wanna put up with the stress of me getting injured again and drawing a ton of attention? I'm getting higher toward the end, now. But Senescey carded me; I'm still in."

Shinespark bit her lip.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. That's not what you really wanted." Valey drew her breath back in, swiveling her chair to flatly face her friend. "I don't know how to do it. I don't know how to balance whatever you and Felicity and everyone else think it is I used to do with not trying my best to drive everyone away. Or at least giving them an excuse for it. I dunno how to enjoy something I feel like I never really enjoyed at all. Feels like something's been beaten out of me with nothing left to take its place."

Shinespark slowly nodded. "I can relate. I think everyone on this ship can. But most of them bounced quickly the moment this restaurant idea got floated. I think you have it worst, and I don't like seeing you like this." She shifted her sapphire eyes. "Is it Nyala? I know we've had her back for a while now, and I know you... might not be feeling like you've done the best job helping her get her body back..."

Valey sighed again. "I mean, that certainly doesn't help. Bananas, I don't wanna let her down. It's just... weird, talking to someone who's been dead for six years who doesn't remember you at all."

"So what else is there?" Shinespark pressed. "Tell me there's something I can do. I'm not feeling my greatest, but I still have a fire to try. What can I do to help you?"

"...I dunno," Valey admitted. "I really dunno."

"Come on, there has to be something! Something with Felicity?" Shinespark leaned forward, ears perked hopefully. "I'm sorry for not trusting her for you, I guess. We could invite her here to make up... Or we could do something together ourselves?" She grimaced. "I'm trying, here!"

Valey shrugged. "I mean, we do need Felicity to drop by sometime or other. She kinda told me she wants a look at Crystal, and since she already knows... but other than that, I'm really drawing a blank."

"I tried." Shinespark slumped back in her chair. "I really tried. I don't know what it will take to get us out of this slump either. But just so you know, we will have the money for more potions after all this. So at least think a while more on whether to throw in the towel with the tournament."

"Great. More thinking about it. Just what I need..." Valey yawned. "I gotta do something someday. Meh. Bananas. You got any way I can help with that stuff with Nyala?"

"If you want to." Shinespark passed over another book with her horn. "Get reading and tell me how much of this makes sense."