Hey, so I got that box and all the books are in it. All eight books of the Dark Tower series as well as The Hobbit. I also remember you asking me at one point to measure the box the Blu-Ray player comes in. Thankfully, cardboard boxes are already labeled with the dimensions so I didn't need to put in much extra work. In length by width by height (inches), the box is 13x9x11. Don't know how much longer it needs to take on your end now, but I'm ready for you.
Hello?
Sorry, had to find the book the spell was in. It's not a spell most unicorns and alicorns perform on a regular basis, so I'm going to need a reference if I want to do this right.
Right, of course. Sorry for sounding pushy.
That's fine, Toby, you had no way of knowing. Still, I need to draw out the length and width of your box and then cast its depth. Then once its done, I still need to mail it to you, and that's going to take some time for the parchment to show up on your end.
Okay, I'm getting a better idea of what we're doing, but do you mind telling me how this is all working? In layman's terms, of course.
Certainly! I first get a large enough piece of parchment to draw the length and width out. Then, what I do is I use magic to create a space within those parameters that the box will go into. Once I've done that, I'll cast another spell to return the paper somewhat to normal, but from that point on, any object that sits inside the outline will "sink" into the paper and rest inside that space until another pony can extract the object out of it.
Wow. That's going to look so cool from my end.
I'm sure it will, but there's some things you'll need to know. Only one object can go into the space at a time, so make sure the box and only the box gets placed inside the outline once you get the parchment. Second, make sure no part of the parchment within the outline is damaged, or the spell will be broken. To be fair, it won't be as big a deal if you do so before you put the box in; I can just cast another one. But if you tear or damage the parchment after that, your books will be lost forever, and I'd hate for that to happen.
Ditto. So, how much longer do you think it'll take before you mail it to me?
As a matter of fact, I worked on the spell while we were writing, and it's already been neatly folded and put in my mailbox. It's only been a couple minutes since then, but it should be coming your way momentarily. In the meantime, I've got some questions for you now.
Shoot.
First, these Dark Tower books. Are any of them scary? What should I expect, other than the stuff I read about, beforehand?
Yes, well, obviously, there's a lot of themes of racial tension in these books, though I feel like you've read enough Stephen King to have a good idea of the kinds of subject matters he tends to get into.
I suppose. And this book, the Hobbit. I assume that's the book for Spike you were talking about earlier? What's that one?
It's about a creature called a hobbit (think of them like humans, but shorter and with large feet, who goes on an epic quest to help a band of dwarves (like hobbits, but with normal feet and a bit gruffer) raid and reclaim a vast treasure being hoarded by a fearsome
Is it a dragon? Do they kill the dragon?
I don't know how that could have slipped my mind, but yeah, at one point, they do kill the dragon. I'd completely understand if Spike wouldn't want to read anything like that. I can take the book out before I send the Dark Tower series to you.
Can you tell me what happens? Like, was the dragon evil and it was trying to kill the heroes? Or maybe even worse?
Are you fine with me spoiling it for you?
If it makes you feel better about lending the book to Spike, then sure, tell me what happens to the dragon.
Well, he is a very greedy, wicked dragon, and he drove the dwarves from their home and took the treasure, and when the hobbit takes a single piece of the treasure, the dragon gets angry and rampages a nearby town, forcing one of its inhabitants to kill it.
I see. I haven't told you much about dragons other than Spike, but dragons are typically very greedy by nature, and their greed leads to them being typically ill-tempered, and in some cases, violent creatures. Back in old times, ponies have actually had to slay dragons that have tried to attack and raid their towns and kingdoms, and Spike learned about this himself after he once went to the Dragonlands to do some soul-searching. As I'm sure I've said before, Spike is still very mature for his age, and I'm certain that if the dragon in that book is as evil as you described, then I'm certain he will accept its death.
I guess that's a relief? I certainly don't want to make it out like I'm antagonizing his kind or anything.
Spike knows firsthand how antagonistic dragons can be, so I can hardly think he'll be that offended. If it makes you feel better, I can warn him about the dragon and if he'll still feel comfortable reading it, but I'm certain at this point that he'll still dive headfirst into this book if it's still as good as you claim.
It's a classic, and an engrossing read at that. As a matter of fact, that parchment may be here by now. I'll go check the mailbox, and when it comes, I'll go ahead and put everything together. Can we talk more once it's back in my mailbox?
Absolutely. Take your time.
Okay, talk to you soon.