//------------------------------// // Rad: Cross Promotion // Story: Dan Vs. The Magic of Friendship(Season 1) // by Barrobroadcaster //------------------------------// Dan and the Doctor hung helplessly, surrounded by a sparkly, bluish glow. They lightly bobbed as they hung in the air, the stallion with an expression of slight curious bewilderment and the human a very unimpressed scowl. "So." "..." "What made you throw your lot in with this bunch?" Dan turned to Whooves. "What do you mean by that?" The Doctor shifted his head. "You don't exactly seem like you'd... well, be the type to get along with a bunch of magical horses. Talking ponies and whatnot. Happy, giggly, cute non-stop-" "I told you to STOP. Okay? One question, one statement. Then stop. No running dialogue," Dan instructed. "No commentary, no-" The Doctor interrupted. "I'll do my thing, you can do yours, thank you very much," he said, folding his forelegs. "As I've said, I'm not from here either. You can't just boss me around." "Okay, number-one, no. Number-two, I don't care, and number-three, yes I can. I'm captain of the guard and that makes me captain of your limey flank while it's on my turf," Dan stated. "Fine. Captain all the arses you want. You can be the King of Arsequestria for all I care, long may you reign," Whooves said, throwing his hooves up. "What I want to know is WHY you decided to do it. Why even stay here if you have to go through all of... this?" Dan shrugged. "It's not complicated. Twilight... pretty much everyone here gave me a second chance. Before, I'd always been about getting back at people. Payback. Other people might wait around for karma, but I don't. Then, Equestria made me realize it's not enough just to get payback for myself." The young human looked past Doctor Whooves for a moment as he spoke. "Some people deserve a second chance. Even if they don't know it." "You're talking about Earth." Dan nodded. "Is there even a difference any more? If Equestria and Earth and... everything are all connected, are they even different things?" The Doctor paused briefly, as if to consider the question. Then, he said, "Sure. Time connects a lot of things, too. It's all part of history. Or, different histories. The same place, the same people can change and become different. As different as one moment to the next. I mean, just look at me. I've been a Time-lord, a human, a dragon, a pony, man and woman and there was this one time I became a dalek and-" "You're doing it again." "Yes. I tend to ramble. And think out loud. And ponder and pontificate and postulate until the next point in my life," the Doctor said, half-admission and half-declaration. "I think and I tinker with problems. I help people. That's what every Doctor has in common." Dan did not respond to that. The speech on thinking actually got Dan to think about what the Doctor said. Specifically, what he said about people and places being different and the same when separated by time. Were Vice and Rice really the same pony separated by the ages? If Vice was the pony equivalent of Dan as both he and the Director had said, did that mean Dan had another transformation down the road? Or had it already happened? ...Nah, he was Dan. But maybe there was a way to get Vice and Rice back together. Rarity approached the two hovering males. "Well, I'm happy to see you two getting along better." "Yes. We're playing nice now." "Would you mind putting us down? Please?" Rarity smiled and released them from her magical grasp. After the two of them spent twenty minutes nearly killing each other trying to get the Stable door open, she used a levitation spell to give them a timeout. Her magical abilities had improved significantly since she was escaped from Rice's clutches, but even then, she had always been adept with kinetic and levitation spells. Helped to hold things while she made her dresses. "So did you get the door open?" "After quite a while, yes. Yes I did. It was not easy, but with perseverance, patience and a bit of magic, I succeeded," she said, beaming slightly. Dan looked at the door, then back to Rarity, then to the door again, then back to Rarity again. "You teleported through the door and opened it from the other side, didn't you?" "I did say a BIT of magic, didn't I?" Dan frowned. "I'm going to steal Rice's technoporting thingy and I'll be able to do that, too. After I kill him. Of course." "Of course." There was no warm welcome, or a welcome of any kind when they entered Stable Four. Considering the last Stables the group had been in, they were each thankful for that fact. The lights came on automatically when the door opened but there were no armed guards, no automated voices and no trap doors. And then a golden, three-armed, three-eyed floating robot came out of nowhere to greet them. "Hello! I'm Mr. Cap-Apble and I'm here to-" *BLAM* "FUCK!" "Holy piss!" "Dear goodness, Dan!" Dan reloaded Dollars' shotgun and fired again. *BLAM* "Okay... everything is okay. It's dead now." "What in the hell was it? Why did you do that?!" the Doctor frantically demanded. "Really Dan, to just shoot the poor thing when we don't even know what it is..." "Oh, but we DO know what it is," Dan said, reloading. And as he did, another one came into view. "Hello! I'm-" *BLAM* *BLAM* "Ddddrrrrzzz-zzztt, hrrrbbbgggrrrzzz-" *BLAM* The Doctor let go of his ears. Putting both hooves on the ground, he asked, "Why?" "Why, Dan?" Rarity asked as well. "Because. The last time I saw one of these things, it was at the day spa. In Ponyville. Trying to lobotomize you," Dan said. Rarity looked at the two sparking piles of refuse. "You think... you think Yes-Man is behind this?" "It wouldn't surprise me. Haven't seen that creepy face-in-a-box since Nightmare Night. Kinda happy about that fact, too." "Yes-Man?" Doctor asked. "A robot Rice came up with to gather data on the ponies and Dan. He was sent to experiment on the town for some reason," Rarity said. Dan tapped his chin. "We saw that pink goo again that time. Before that, Flim and Flam had some kind of gum..." "Pink goo?" Doctor asked. Dan nodded. "I have a feeling we're gonna find more here. Just like we found inside the factory at the center of Equestria," he said. He headed deeper into the Stable, shotgun ready. "Factory at the center of Equestria? Honestly? Is anyone going to fill me in on that one?" the Doctor asked. He'd have to wait for an answer until later as he was forced to follow Dan and Rarity. Dan decided to shoot the doors open. Because he could. Every time he did, Doctor Whooves would wince like it was artillery going off, but Rarity eventually got used to it. Well, not really used to it so much as she just began to expect it. They did find a couple more robots, both of which didn't notice them as the first two did but which Dan scrapped just the same. "Mr. Cap-Apble..." Rarity said, poking at the eye stalk of one of the destroyed bots. "Why does that name sound familiar?" Dan realized he recognized the name as well. And then, that feeling of familiarity became annoyance. He realized he remembered what it was from, and that reminder came with irritation. "Bah. It's from Fallout: Equestria. More of the Director's fan crap." "Wasn't Yes-Man also in Fallout Equestria?" Doctor asked. "Ehhh... maybe one of the spinoffs. You'd have to ask Chrys or Twilight; I'm more of a Daring Do fan." The Doctor grinned. "Are you a Doctor Whooves fan?" Dan reloaded the shotgun again. "I don't think you want me to answer that." "On second thought, you might be right. Please, carry on~" "Right." The Stable's hallways branched off into three separate wings, each one an enormous box-like floor surrounded by windows. Underground windows surrounded the different levels of the wings, with lab rooms and testing chambers in the center of the floors. Dan looked out through one of the windows. "They've got more tunnels leading out. Big enough for a car or train, maybe." "You said big enough for a car? There seems to be tire tracks over here," Doctor Whooves said. Rarity had less experience with cars and didn't know what to look for. Dan nodded. "Maybe Stable Four tested vehicle designs. Might explain the garage above us." "Stable Four... as in four-by-four," the Doctor said. "Oh, if they stole my car and have it down here, I'm going to kill them. I mean, I'll thank them for having my car here and I'll take it back from them, but I'll also kill them. Kill and thank at the same time. Ki-thank them. Something like that." Whooves frowned. "Now YOU'RE doing it. See? See how easy it is?" "He has a point, Dan." "Okay, fine. So I'm kind-of a revenge fanboy. Revengeboy. Oh gawd, if I start talking like you, use this on me," Dan said, holding up the shotgun. "Do you want me to hold onto that for you now?" "Actually, no. Nevermind. I'll just use it on everyone else first." "How very reassuring," Whooves remarked. "Your answer to depression is to kill everyone else instead. Very therapeutic." "I do enjoy putting people out of their misery," Dan said. "Doctor Dan's got your twelve-gauge medicine right here." "You need serious mental help." "Don't we all." Rarity stopped in front of a poster. There were dozens of the typical framed propaganda posters throughout the Stable, all of which was to be expected. The Stables were publicly touted as 'functional homages' to the beloved Fallout: Equestria novel. Stables 1 and 2 were located in Canterlot and Ponyville respectively, though not precisely in the locations they were in the book, and served as tourist attractions before Stable-Tec went completely bankrupt. Which was intentional. "That's odd," Rarity said, touching the poster. "I didn't know there were humans... humans in Fallout: Equestria?" Rarity asked herself. "No, that's not right." "Well, in some of the mods there are... what are you talking about?" Dan asked. "This poster. It's Littlepip and a human." Back-to-back, a brightly-smiling Littlepip held her hoof outstretched with a human at her side, arm outstretched giving a thumbs-up. Above them read the caption Teamwork Today Means A Better Tomorrow!. Underneath it was another caption that read Better Future. Together Future. - Stable-Tec "Maybe it's cross promotion. Or in this case, crossover promotion," Dan suggested. "There's more over here," Rarity said. Another poster held a picture of a hand and a hoof embracing, wearing a PipBoy and PipBuck respectively. "Ahhh," Dan nodded. "I think I've got it. This Stable was obviously for humans and ponies. A hybrid." "I'm not so sure about that," Doctor Whooves said. "Look at this." The final framed poster in the room wasn't of Littlepip, a human or anything from any Fallout universe that they knew of. It was Twilight Sparkle and the Mane Six dressed as different versions of Link, the main character from the Legend of Zelda video game series. The poster depicted the Link-Twilight fighting Ganondorf, the series' main villain. Each of the Mane Six held one of Link's iconic items- Applejack with a huge hammer, Fluttershy had the bow and arrows, Rainbow Dash with the boomerang, Rarity with the hookshot and Pinkie Pie, naturally held up a bomb in each hoof. A puzzled Spike held a small conductor's baton and an ocarina in each claw "Oooooooookay then. Crossover promotion is looking a bit more likely." Continuing the search yielded more evidence to that fact. Every room and hallway had some form of motivational framed poster placarded in it somehow. Some seemed to promote new adventures for the Mane Six, Derpy, Daring Do or Celestia and Luna, all of which were crossed over with something else in some way. One in a hallway showed the Mane Six as the crew of their own Star Trek spinoff, another showed Derpy as a secret agent, two different ones showed Celestia and Luna fighting against the Decepticons from Transformers. "Are these posters for movies or games?" Dan asked. "I don't know," Rarity said. "Perhaps neither? Or... both?" "Or something more," Doctor Whooves said. Dan looked at the posters. Each one of them showed most of the characters with confident, happy expressions. Heroic. A few weren't even violent- there was one that showed the Mane Six racing cars and another that showed them vacationing on a tropical island. There wasn't a single poster that showed them as sad or upset or in real danger. Eventually, they shot their way into the Overmare's office. Despite being based on an FOE Stable, the office was labeled Overseer and not Overmare. Also, some of the posters clearly showed Littlepip alongside other stallions. Which wasn't too unexpected. In the original Fallout: Equestria, Littlepip was a lesbian with a marefriend, Homage, but by the time the novel was released, lesbian relationships were seen as cliche. Due in no fault to the book itself, Equestria was just predominantly female, with mares outnumbering stallions by a full third in every major city. The most common pony in Equestria's population was the female earth pony, with the male pegasus being least common. Although not at all rare, it explained why ponies like Thunderlane were popular with the ladies. As such, female/female relationships became prevalent, especially in fiction, then waned as the public lost interest. Many fans shipped Littlepip with one of her male companions in different alterations of Fallout Equestria, though the original canon is undisputed. People just liked to do things their own way, and with fanfiction, they were free to do so. "You think the Director shipped Littlepip with Vault Boy?" Whooves asked. "I... really don't care," Dan said. He started to off with 'I don't think so' but quickly changed it. "I might keep one of these posters, though. Springer's a total purist. Would piss her off soooo much to see art of straight LP." Captain Springer, having grown up in the real Pegasus Enclave, was very much a fan of Fallout: Equestria, and even kept an autographed copy of the book in her locker. A lesbian as well and a bit of a hothead, the Director originally was able to get Springer on her side by convincing her that Kkat's book was essentially a prediction of the future that would happen with or without her. Although she since repatrioted, changing FOE in any way would indeed infuriate her. "Bit nerdy coming from you, Dan," Whooves said. Dan shrugged. "Again, Ima revenge fanboy. Now help me get it out from under the frame." "Why don't you just shoot it off?" was the question Doctor Whooves asked and then immediately regretted. Dan pulled out his shotgun and fired at the frame. The shot bounced off the magically-protected frame, off the magically-protected wall and into the not-magically-protected plate glass window, which shattered. Then, the alarm sounded. "Great. Now you went and broke everything." "Relax," Dan said, barely raising his voice at all over the sound of the alarms. "There's nobody even here. We'll just find and shoot the alarm and it'll shutoff. The only ones that would've responded anyway were the-" "Hello!" "Hello!" "Hello" "Hello!" "Hello!" "Hello!" "Hello!" The voices echoed, almost becoming a single "HELLO" as they rose to a near-deafening pitch. Mr. Cap-Apble robots poured out of the tunnels, the doorways, the hallways and all of them immediately surrounded Dan, Rarity and Doctor Whooves. The robots crowded them so much that Dan was only able to shoot three more of them before he was disarmed by crowding alone. A single spritebot descended from the ceiling. Its television screen-face turned on to reveal a familiar, yet unpleasant expression to Dan. "Hi there! Did you miss me?" Yes-Man asked. "No," Dan replied, both a direct answer and response to the entire situation they were in. Unfortunately, his answer was overruled.