//------------------------------// // 14. Sundae Funday - Vs Pinkie Pie // Story: Kirby: Equus Defender // by QuartzScale //------------------------------// Kirby and Luna approached another cavern only this time there didn’t seem to be anyways forward aside from through a water filled cavern. Luna groused slightly since her wings were still a bit soaked from her previous swim. She felt a bit heavier do to the water in her wings. “Poyo?” Kirby spoke up. “No Sir Kirby I do not appreciate having waterwings now.” Luna groaned since that was most likely a joke but with how innocent he acted she could never be sure. Kirby chuckled before hopping into the water. An inner tube appeared around him before he dove under and they disappeared into goggles. “I will learn how you do what you do eventually…” Luna announced to no one in particular. She dove into the water with her bubble head charm taking effect. She would need to give anypony who ever traveled with Kirby a talisman with the charm enchanted upon it before they adventured with him. She dove into the water kicking her hooves to push ahead. It was a tight path but Luna was flexible enough to fit anywhere they needed to go. Kirby would frequently stop whenever he was ahead to make sure she was okay. It took a little forced exploration before they found the right path. She had lit her horn making things a bit easier to navigate. The two finally found a door… which deposited them far above ground when they were in the water. “It doesn’t bother me. It doesn’t bother me. It bothers me. It bothers me a lot and my wings are still wet!” Luna shouted as she shook crazily coating everything in water. Kirby wiped his face off from the small deluge that covered him. He giggled lightly as the two walked along the new path that they found themselves upon. Meanwhile… King Dedede sat around the fountain looking over all the plans Escargoon, Bandana Dee and Meta Knight had given him. Nothing came of it and while the Elements of Harmony was given more thought… Celestia disapproved the use of them. The fact they were held by civilians made it even worse to their cause. The fact that Nightmare and Nightmare Moon were working together made them a sitting duck. Celestia had created a magical projection of what would happen. Nightmare would force Nightmare Moon forward. The orbital rainbow death blast would hit her then Nightmare would kill one of the six who wielded them. They were too magically draining for the six who had barely met that night that it would leave them open. And as they saw… Meta Knight and Celestia were barely capable of keeping either of the enemies too busy.for very long. Little by the little the plans dried up and nothing could be done. Celestia started to stress eat copious amounts of cake which was only made worse by the waddles dees constantly supplying her with those slices. Their stress levels reached critical when the next piece of news reached their ears. “Huh… what do you mean?” Dedede asked his attendant and friend Bandana Dee. “Um… Applejack is here to see the two of you.” Bandana Dee spoke up. Coming from behind a rock limped a pretty bruised Applejack still partially tangled in her rope. Celestia quickly undid the rope as Applejack couldn’t even look her in the eye. It took a long while until she was ready to speak which was only permeated as King Dedede shook Bandana Dee around yelling at him about Whispy Woods condition and his piece of the Star Rod. “Ah’m sorry Princess. We failed. Right a short while while I was moseying around his woods checking the apple trees we were attacked.” Applejack started stopping as she recollected her thoughts. “Who was it? Was it those filthy thieves the Squeak Squad? Or was it the Skull Gang from those blasted islands near the Dragon Lands? Nobody else is supposed to know what I did with the Star Rod in the first place but those two organizations had been a real thorn in the behind if you get my drift.” Dedede groused as he hefted his hammer. “Gotta teach those pests what a good exterminator I am!” “I reckon… but it wasn’t any of those confangled groups… ya see. It was Kirby.” Applejack finally admitted as Dedede went hopping mad. “What!? That pink creampuff will ruin our entire plan! Why didn’t you stop him he’s only one thing!?” Dedede pointed accusingly at Applejack only to be hoisted up in the air by Celestia’s magic. After he was seated and slightly calmer than he was they resumed. “I’m sure Applejack did her best. There must have been extenuating circumstances behind this going down.” Celestia chided her stalwart royal companion. “Well I reckon that’s the thing there Princess. There was someone else there…” Applejack started. “See, I told you there was a reasonable solution. No way one being took out all those that got in their way so easily. Now which pony is helping him.” Celestia daintily drinked from her tea cup taking a long slurp. “See… it was Princess Luna helping him.” Applejack stated. Celestia turned to Applejack and in one quick motion spit tea all over her face. The torrential flow of tea coated Applejack, her hat and dropped down her fetlocks leaving her soaked. She groused slightly and quietly mumbled how only Twilight would enjoy something gross like that. “What!? What!? What!?” Celestia went on overdrive screaming out the same word until Dedede slapped her hard enough to send her spinning. “Calm down there Celestia, your worry wart nature is showing.” Dedede chuckled taking great pleasure in her freak out. “Calm down! Calm down! How can I be calm when my sister is putting herself into unreasonable danger!” Celestia summoned a paper bag and began breathing into it making Applejack turn away lest she see her ruler act like a spaz. “Bah! We just stop her and make her go back home until Meta Knight figures out a permanent solution to our problem.” Dedede waved her concerns off. As tough as she was she still needed a bit of rest after what happened to her and Whispy. Bandanna Dee immediately ushered her away while Celestia attempted to control her outburst. Applejack was gonna take a good long nap from the rodeo she just got out of. “You done there?” Dedede grumbled as Celestia breathed a little too hard making the bag pop open. “I’m fine. I’m cool. I’m collected…” Celestia slammed her head against the table smashing her cake with the anxiety that burned beneath her fur. “I’ll take that as a no. Meta Knight!” Dedede screamed out as the familiar knight warped in with the butter colored pegasus by his side. “Yes my liege?” Meta Knight answered although the tone was dismissive and slightly not on point. While Meta Knight did work with Dedede, he didn’t work for him. “Can you keep an eye on the dark blue pony with Kirby and make sure she doesn’t do something she’s gonna regret?” Dedede ordered though to the more attentive viewer he made sure merely to ask rather than order. That was their dynamic and how they worked with each other in long term missions. “Yes. I shall keep an eye out on her.” Meta Knight smoothly answered keeping his cape around him while Fluttershy merely shook in place. “Oh dear… that sounded ominous…” Fluttershy squeaked slightly though no one could hear her comment. With another flap of his cape the two disappeared back into thin air. Dedede merely kept eating his light snack as Celestia picked the cake crumbs off her face. She was still a proponent of the ideal of waste not want not. “Blasted Cur! Come hither and ye shall get mon horseshoe up thy posterior!” Luna yelled out as a new enemy fought the pair off. A group of Knuckle Joes had struck against the two unleashing a barrage of vulcan jabs and hadoukens against the two. Kirby was having some trouble since his needed him to suck something in and the UFO only lasted so long. Kirby looked at his environment and then at Luna. Then back to the environment and back to Luna. He did so a few times until he finally formed a plan. “Poyo!” Kirby called out as he rushed ahead. “Are you mad!” Luna cried back but initiated her part of the plan before things could get dicey. As Kirby rushed forward jumping over the hadoukens, Luna fired off a salvo of beams in a machine gun fashion. They impacted on the first Knuckle Joe allowing Kirby enough room to get close and suck him into his mouth. In a flash of light Kirby reappeared this time with a red headband around his head… where a forehead would be had Kirby not be so spherical. With a blast of speed Kirby release several roundhouse kicks knocking the other Joes away. Luna invigorated by the new form took her chance to gallop forward. It was refreshing to see the path cleared so easily as Kirby grabbed another enemy and punched it so hard only dust remained. In truth it disturbed her a bit how strong this creature was when he was so small and adorable. It was smooth sailing at that point as the barrage of vulcan jabs and laser beams from the two pierced through the enemy footholds allowing the two to get closer to their goal. Pinkie sat near the window stroking a Scarfy almost menacingly. Paint Roller stood nearby since the two had retired to his private workshop. The air was tense. “Truly… they come to me on the day of my biggest party. Truly a blessed day for all involved.” Pinkie invokes her most convincing mafioso personality as she turned to the window. “We’ll rub them out before they know it.” Paint Roller took the mafia hat she had found away from her making her return to her normal peppy self. “Awwh… I was getting into character.” Pinkie pouted precociously while politely poking her pet Scarfy. Then it turned into its evil form and she threw it through a wall. “Sorry!” Pinkie yelled through the new hole she made. The two intrepid heroes had finally made it to the gallery that was still bouncing from a party that went on. Kirby nervously got his mind ready to punch something while Luna used her hoof to grasp the handle. The door burst open sending the two flying backwards with Luna holding on for dear life by the handle. The music was so powerful that Kirby struggled with Luna’s tail just trying his best to hold on for dear life. Eventually they started changing sets letting the two regain their footing. “Blasted music…” Luna groused while Kirby stepped into the room. A record scratched as everyone saw Kirby. The sudden panic as every single creature rushed Kirby who began using his fighting prowess to smash his way through the mobs. Luna wasted no time using shields to smash the creatures into the wall leaving indents where they impacted. Kirby continued vulcan jabbing his way through the horde switching between hadoukens and a quick Smash Punch breaking through solid stone. “Poyo!” Kirby screamed out. “Sir Kirby! Don’t speak about yonder enemy’s mother like such!” Luna answered appalled at the vulgarness behind his fist. “Poyo!” Kirby answered. “What do you mean I misunderstood you!? I’m certain you were talking like that!” Luna shouted back. “Poyo poyo!” Kirby argued back clearly offended. “You meant that he wasn’t the bomb… not that you were nailing his… oh.” Luna stopped herself clearly confused. “Perhaps the thrill of combat had gotten to me.” “Poyo…” Kirby sighed and shook his head. They fought their way through clearing the area of the other creatures within the Dream Land Militia. The next piece of the Star Rod was somewhere around them but they couldn’t find it. After all the fighting the two lifted and looked under all the paintings and sculptures.using their nubs and magic respectively. “Hehehehehehehe… you’ll never find it.” A shrill laughter followed by the sound of mirthful cheer emanated through the entire building. “Laughter! Show thyself!” Luna called out flaring her wings in an aggressive manner. “Dreams must return to the ponies!” “Poyo!” Kirby screamed out agreeing since he was disturbed by the lack of dreams. The two looked around searching for any sign of Pinkie but… there was nothing. The lights turned off suddenly leaving the entire building in darkness. A single spotlight appeared showing a cupcake standing alone in the center of the light. Cautiously, the two stepped forward until another spotlight appeared. Another cupcake and another light allowed the two to follow the path. Kirby ate them though he was carefully taking one bite after another. Luna shook her head when he was about to eat another one. Kirby ate one anyways though he did so carefully. Luna sighed and just allowed Kirby to continue. “That’s right… follow the trail my little ponies.” Pinkie sang out clearly getting things ready behind the scenes. “Laughter… “ Luna growled out clearly annoyed now by the sudden change in abilities. “We do not have time for this.” With a large blast of her horn Luna shot out a section of the wall revealing both Pinkie and Paint Roller hidden behind it alongside four canvases. Pinkie looked positively shocked and dismayed while Paint Roller just facepalmed. “Poyo!” Kirby shouted pointed accusingly at Paint Roller. “What Sir Kirby said! We will take the piece of the Star Rod now!” Luna answered in kind clearly following his lead. “Aww… I wish I could understand Kirby.” Pinkie frowned for a moment before becoming determined. “But I can’t think about that now. Since you two are being meanies I’ll have to put you in time out. Rock Farmer style!” Pinkie shouted to the heavens. VS Pinkie and Paint Roller Paint Roller painted up several rocks all the size of Celestia. With a quick buck Pinkie sent the rocks flying at the two in a flurry of speed and precision. Luna dove to the side clearly underestimating Pinkie while Kirby used his prodigious strength under the Fighter hat and broke his way through them. “I thought thy was naught but a baker!” Luna shouted out clearly flustered at the sudden impact of several rocks leaving craters and rubble behind. “That’s not all silly! I’ve always been a rock farmer!” Pinkie proudly exclaimed as Paint Roller Painted several more stones for Pinkie. As Pinkie took her time knocking the rocks at the two she always seemed to hit them hesitantly. Luna was given plenty of time to escape and Kirby broke his way through them. Luna noticed this and decided to take advantage of the situation. With a little planning she grabbed the rubble in her magic sending it out like a shotgun blast against the two. Pinkie remained unflinching as she weathered the rock storm smashing the rocks like they were nothing. Paint Roller, on the other hand, raced through using his brush to paint obstacles so as to not be crushed. Kirby took advantage and raced up to him sending a flurry of vulcan jabs into his body. Paint Roller used his free hand to act as a shield but his roller skates made him roll backwards after every hit. Pinkie switched over to her cake ammunition blasting away with her party cannon forcing Luna to run. “Gallop! Gallop or you’re in for a wallop!” Pinkie yelled out clearly using cakes as weaponry was taking its toll on her mind. “Laughter! Quit this farce and yield! Yipe- “ Luna yelped as a triple decker cake flew over where her head had been. “You know me. No shirt! No Shoes! No Service!” Pinkie activated her auto fire as a stream of cake batter flew out of the muzzle. “We don’t wear shirts!” Luna voiced her complaints though they fell on deaf ears. “Poyo!” Kirby also called out as a quick rising upper punch sent Paint Roller over several of his canvases. “Oh… oh gosh. I forgot entirely about this.” Pinkie looked completely ashamed… until she brought out a shirt and some floppy shoes putting them on. “There we go. Crisis averted.” Pinkie smiled as she continued her assault. Paint Roller got back up releasing a cavalcade of painted enemies which swarmed Kirby. Kirby punched his way through sending the antagonistic artwork flying. That frustrated the angry artist as he painted even more enemies including gordos. The gordos zoomed out flying towards the two. Only a quick jump from Kirby and a low duck from Luna led them to safety. Pinkie assisted by tossing several cream pies of various flavors at the pair. Chocolate and Banana splattered across the room leaving it covered in slop. “Enough!” Luna shouted as she used her magic and gathered all the batter and cream and forced it to surround Pinkie who looked up in fear. “Meep…” Pinkie squeaked before she was lost in a wave of batter. Paint Roller had gotten away and Luna’s righteous anger baked the batter trapping Pinkie in a cake. It encrusted itself around her making her wriggle in futility. Paint Roller was about to help her when Kirby came in and slammed into him with his foot wreathed in energy. The sudden impact sent him flying as he smashed through a canvas and cratered into the wall. He was stuck in an imprint of his body on the wall which made Kirby sigh in relief. “Now Laughter… where is the piece of the Star Rod. My patience grows thin. Should thy tongue not be loose ye shall suffer a fate worse than you could handle.” Luna warned Pinkie clearly unamused at this point. “Do your worst! I’ll never tell you anything!” Pinkie cried out. “I mean it’s not like I know anything. I’m just here partying and meeting new friends and then bam you waltz in hurting everyone. I mean yes they’re hiding the Star Rod but you could’ve asked for it.” Paint Roller shook his head and Pinkie got the message quickly trying to figure out a good way to spin it. “I mean we weren’t gonna give you it but you could’ve been nicer about things!” Pinkie pouted up until she saw Luna’s horn light up. Kirby looked mortified by what he saw. The cake shifted and turned black but it wasn’t burnt. No it was much worse. Black Licorice Cake. Pinkie looked as if she was about to cry. It was that horrible. Kirby was certain at this point that there was no god anymore. “Talk Laughter… don’t make me do this anymore.” Luna solemnly stated as Pinkie looked forlornly at Paint Roller who was unmoved by the sight. He was ready to give it his all. “It’s… I… it’s… under his hat…” Pinkie broke allowing Kirby to take the piece from under Paint Roller’s hat. Broken, Pinkie’s mane turned limp as she lost. Luna held up her chin looking into her eyes. “I’m sorry Laughter but we must restore dreams. Whatever you are doing isn’t helping but by helping us you’ve taken a step to saving our dreams.” Luna attempted to comfort her. “Really?” Pinkie desperately answered hoping that she wasn’t being lied to. “Poyo poyo poyo.” Kirby assured her. “I can understand you!” Pinkie smiled as tears streamed down her cheeks. She still looked shocked. “How!?” “You’ve awakened your empathy. You need it at a higher level to understand the language of the heart.” Luna explained and quickly amended some parts. “That’s not to say you didn’t understand ponies but you needed to lose something to gain something else. It’s different for everypony and for you it seems to be a sense of taste or something to that effect.” “And the cake?” Pinkie looked around at the black licorice. “Nothing but a ruse. An illusion of epic proportions.” Luna lit up her horn and the cake returned to normal. Kirby looked relieved as if a god had come down from on high and restored his faith in baked goods. And just like that the dance effect took hold as the two did a tango before striking a pose in success. “It’s seems that this is goodbye for now Laughter. We shall meet again later.” Luna waved as Kirby summoned up the warp star. “It’s Pinkie.” Pinkie stated trying to force a change. “That’s what I said Laughter. Fare Thee Well!” Luna jumped onto the star with Kirby and the two slammed through the ceiling. “Don’t give me that look. She was one of the princesses. There was no way we could stop them when they have the same authority like King Dedede and Princess Celestia.” Pinkie quickly cut off Paint Roller’s glare. Instead he got back up and held his face in his hands clearly frustrated. He had failed his friend and now they were on the way to the next guardian.