//------------------------------// // Chapter 1 - Thrown into the Fray // Story: The Stuff of Legends // by Harvs //------------------------------// Chapter 1 Thrown into the Fray Vinyl Scratch paced back and forth, analyzing the situation as best she could. She made sure to keep an eye on her trusty bass cannon being in the company of five strangers, though they didn't seem to be hostile. Instead, they seemed to be analyzing their current state just as she was. "Alright, so nopony remembers how they got here?" She asked, pointing to each of the strange... people surrounding her. "I'm not even sure how you're able to talk." The human with the single wing said. He clearly did not want to stay with any of these people, but they likely held important information as to how he ended up in their companies. "Most horses I've met were incapable of speech." "Incapable of speech? You must've met some pretty weird horses then pal." Vinyl joked, prodding his boot with her hoof. "I don't know about you, but this is the weirdest conversation I've ever seen." The black puppy dog said to you, the reader, cupping his mouth with one hand and pointing his thumb at Vinyl and the one-winged angel with the other. While the two continued bickering back and forth, a man wearing a gas mask sat quietly on a pile of wooden planks with his legs folded and his chin resting on his palms. His flamethrower laid down next to him, dangerously close to a potato who was in no way looking to be baked. "Excuse me sir," The potato said, causing the man to look around in alarm and make some strange muffled noises which the mechanical spud could only assume was a futile attempt at speech. "I would be ever so grateful if you would remove your over-sized cigarette lighter from my connector cables." After a few seconds of the two just sitting in silence, most of which had the man turning his gaze to the others to try and understand how a vegetable could talk, he picked up his home-made flamethrower and placed it on the ground by his feet. "Thanks, it was getting kind of hot. Well, while we're not doing anything important, we might as well get to know each other. As painful as this sounds, I think we may be spending a lot of time together. I am a Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System, but you can call me GLaDOS for short. I'm a potato." The other five became silent at the surprising fact that a potato could talk. "Hmm hmm mm mm Hmmrm." The man said, gesturing to the flame symbol on his bicep. The others just stared at him. "Sorry, my Speech Receptive Units could not register that as a language. Does anyone here know how to speak Idiot?" "Sure do!" The black dog said, rushing over at an almost unnatural speed. "It's actually my native tongue. I'm Yakko by the way. Nice to meet ya Spuddy." "Well since we're introducing ourselves," The white pony said, trotting over to the group near the wooden plank bench. "My name's Vinyl Scratch." "... Sephiroth..." Said the man in the back, turned away from the others. "Now that we've got the formalities out of the way-" "Wait Sephy," Vinyl cut him off mid-sentence. "There's still one more... thing, to introduce." They all turned their attention to a hard-shelled taco sitting next to the pyromaniac. It was filled with Grade-D meat, lettuce, and grated cheese. There were also two large bites in it, implying that it had previously been nommed on, but was not satisfying enough to be completely eaten. "... You're kidding right...?" Sephiroth's chin sank to his chest and his glare changed to a look of irritation. The others just ignored him and continued to look at the Mexican delicacy. "Well, what's your name?" Vinyl asked. After about a minute of awkward staring, GLaDOS broke the silence. "So far, you're my favorite." "Am I the only one who's kinda surprised the taco can't talk as well?" Asked Yakko. "Hmm hmmm hrr nmm m mmhmmhm." "Does anypony understand this guy?" Vinyl asked with a sigh. "I believe our vocally impaired friend said that her name is Latisha." Yakko said wearing a Sherlock Holmes ensemble and blowing a bubble pipe. "Mhm." Said the Pyro nodding his head, while the others looked at Yakko in amazement... except for Sephiroth. "How in Equestria did you guess that?" Vinyl asked, adjusting her custom-made, purple sunglasses. Yakko quickly hid the script behind his back. "Eeeeehhh, call it a lucky guess?" "Great, so now we all know each other." Sephiroth cut in, obviously tired of waiting for his chance to get some answers. "Where am I?" Sephiroth waited, but no one had an answer. Looking around, they could see grassy hills, deep valleys, and flowing rivers. But the thing that had everyone befuddled were the huge chunks of land floating in the multicolored sky. In the distance they could see a forest and a few abandoned civilizations, but for the most part, the land was inhabited by wildlife: birds, rhinos, and gazelles all lived in the grassy meadows. Even the occasional elephant wondered by. Someone must have known they were coming, because there was a small camp set up nearby with two tents and some barrels and boxes full of supplies. A plane had crashed not too far away, but the pilot had long since vanished. "Not sure Sephy... But I don't think we're in Ponyville anymore." "... Ponyville?" "But we'll never figure out where we are by just sitting here." Vinyl jumped to her feet and trotted over to her bass cannon. "C'mon everypony!" As the ivory unicorn rolled her amp along the road with a huge grin on her face, Sephiroth folded his arms in protest. "If you don't know where I am, then what use are you to me?" "Aw, come on Seph, don't be such a party pooper." Yakko put his arm around Sephiroth's shoulder and got uncomfortably close to his face. "You'll never make friends with an attitude like that." "I'm not trying to make friends you mangy mutt. And don't call me 'Seph'." While Yakko continued to pester Sephiroth, GLaDOS turned her attention to the Pyro and asked, "So Mr. Pyro, if your not too busy, do you think you could hook me into that plane over there?" "Hmm?" He tilted his head in confusion. "Oh trust me, I'd ask someone else to do it, but the pony doesn't have hands, the taco is inanimate, and frankly I don't trust the tall one or the annoying one." The Pyro nodded in agreement as he picked up the potato and made his way over to the smoking plane. But no matter how hard they tried, the plane would not cooperate. "It's no use. This plane is in no condition to fly. It's just about as useless as you." "Boy, that pilot sure could've used a wing-man." Yakko said, pointing at Sephiroth. The sound of a rim-shot could be heard in the distance. "What did you say?!" Sephiroth roared, drawing his enormous masamune and striking a battle stance not but a few feet from his obnoxious comrade. Dark clouds rolled in all around the camp and the grass at the angel's feet began to burn. "Hey!" Just before Sephiroth struck, Vinyl appeared on the side of the road, her amp facing towards him with her hoof held over a small red button. "I will use this." The clouds vanished, returning the sky to its oddly beautiful array of colors. "What even is that?" Asked Sephiroth, sheathing his blade. "Oh, it's nothing special. It's just my bass cannon." Said Vinyl, shrugging her shoulders. Rather than ask the obvious question, Sephiroth just shook his head and began walking. "I'm going to find answers. If anyone wishes to follow, so be it. But I'm not looking out for any of you." The rest of the group looked at each other, unsure if they really wanted to follow Sephiroth. But before he got too far away, the Pyro grabbed his flamethrower and trailed after the angel. The others followed close behind, GLaDOS and Latisha resting on Vinyl Scratch's amp as she rolled it along. ***** "Well, well, well... It looks like the chosen heroes are here to rain on my parade." said a muscular man with blue skin and green hair, as he brought his fist down on a round table. Around him were six other silhouetted figures of various shape and size. "We'll have to accelerate our plans." Said one of the figures, hidden in the shadows so you can't guess who he is. "As if it matters. I could handle those foals with one hoof tied behind my back." "Why don't we just zerg rush them?" "That wouldn't work you bumbling buffoon!" "Enough!" Shouted the figure right next to the leader. "We have a plan guys. We didn't make it this far by bickering with each other." "And that's why you're my right hand man Will." The leader stood from his chair. "We will deal with these 'heroes' in time. Our ray of sunshine will not be dampened!" "Right!" said five of the shadowed figures. The last one, who hadn't said a single word the entire time just settled for a stereotypical-anime-agreement-grunt. "And besides, they don't know anything about our plans or even where they are." He burst out into evil laughter, his hands on his hips, as his minions joined in. The laughing continued for an unnecessarily long amount of time while the imaginary screen faded to black.