"So...how many does that make?" Celestia asked morbidly.
A sigh from Luna.
"I'd say about twelve so far, and it doesn't look like he's stopping anytime soon."
Celestia closed her eyes, her expression one of obvious dismay.
"That a mortal could behave this way is disgraceful."
Luna nodded in agreement, never once taking her eyes off the mortal world below.
"If it were simply a violation of hospitality, that would be one thing. But murder and theft of his own guests? Simply to pocket their gold? Truly, this is something that needs addressing."
When Celestia opened her eyes again, her gaze was piercing.
"Agreed. An intervention is required. We need our best down there to teach this Filthy Rich the error of his ways."
"Or we could just end his life."
Both sisters turned to the one who had spoken. Sombra, Lord of the Underworld, was as imposing a figure up here on the clouds of the heavens as he was down below the earth. But his remark did not earn him any approval from the chief deity of their realm.
"We do not go around killing people, Sombra. That is the purview of other pantheons."
Sombra rolled his eyes.
"Look, I get that we have this whole 'we're not bad Gods' thing going on, but considering just how beyond-bad this guy here is, I'd say we have no choice."
Celestia opened her mouth to reply, only to be halted when, all of a sudden, there was a scream from down below.
"What was that?" she asked.
Luna nonchalantly glanced downwards.
"Make that count thirteen now."
Celestia stared at the mortal household with pure disbelief, and soon unleashed an exasperated sigh, before turning again to the God of the Underworld.
"...Very well. Ensure this mortal can no longer harm others."
Sombra bowed, turning to leave, but stopping when Celestia spoke again.
"But I want it painless, Sombra!"
Sombra looked back to her with a smile.
"Oh, no need to worry about that..."
He reached behind himself, and swiftly pulled out what appeared to be a large chain and manacles, which bore an eerie glow.
"...I had Mac forge these for me, just in case I ever needed to do something like this."
With that, he disappeared in a thematically-appropriate cloud of dark smoke, leaving the two sisters in a somewhat bewildered state.
"Think he'll restrain himself with this, sister?" Luna asked with concern.
Celestia considered that.
"I just hope he doesn't let this mortal get the better of him."
She looked back down to the earthly plane.
"One doesn't gain the trust of so many soon-to-be victims without being crafty after all."
Sombra, who did not share the same concerns as the two sisters, wasted no time whatsoever as he suddenly poofed into the home of the mortal who had been causing such worries for the former. He looked on at the one in question, Filthy Rich, who was currently sitting at his dinner table with his wife and daughter. The latter two noticed Sombra's arrival immediately, and looked to him with both awe and fear, yet never said a word about him. Filthy, by contrast, felt a sudden chill down his spine, and only after a moment did he notice the fearful expressions on his family. Slowly, he turned, seeing the Lord of Death looming over him, his gaze dark and foreboding. In his hands were the divine chains brought for this troublesome mortal, and Filthy looked to them, perhaps realising on some level that they were meant for him. Though silent, it was clear that Filthy's mind was hard at work trying to come up with a plan, and when he finally put that plan into motion, he got out of his chair and smiled to his visitor.
"Oh my! What wonderful work these chains are!"
Sombra blinked.
"Um...pardon?"
Filthy took a step closer to him, placing one hand upon the chain and looking to it with utter admiration.
"I say, this has got to be the work of the greatest smith of all! This is Macintosh's handiwork, am I correct?"
Though taken aback by the unconventional way this mortal was behaving, Sombra nevertheless responded.
"Er...yes. I asked him to make it special for me. It'll hold anyone and anything."
Filthy nodded, tapping his chin.
"Huh...is that so? Well then..."
Without even a word, Filthy took hold of the chain and, before Sombra could even blink, whipped it out of his hands, darting right behind the God, using the manacles to clamp down on his wrists. Though bewildered, Sombra was unable to do anything before this unexpectedly fast human yanked on the chain, forcing him back into, of all things, a closet. Once inside, he suddenly found said closet closed on him, and the sound that followed alerted him to the fact that he was now locked inside of it. He sat there for a moment, glancing around the gloom of his new prison, before finally commenting on it.
"Huh...this is new."
Celestia watched all this play out from above, then promptly slapped her own forehead out of frustration.
"Honestly! Of all the ways this could have played out!"
Luna chuckled.
"Oh, I am so going to remind him of this during his next festival day."
Celestia frowned to her.
"You know what to do."
Luna shrugged.
"Don't worry, I'm on it."
Putting her fingers into her mouth, Luna let out an almighty whistle, which echoed across all the heavens. It was apparently so loud that even Filthy Rich was able to hear it, and barely had he given himself a pat on the back for his accomplishment when he'd suddenly started to hear a rumble of thunder.
"Um...this may not be as much of a victory for me as I first thought."
His wife looked to him with incredulity.
"Ya think?!"
Then, there was a flash of lightning, right next to the closet where Sombra was imprisoned. All mortals shrank back from it, and they looked on with shock as the towering form of Tempest Shadow now graced their home. There were no pleasantries, no words of announcement from the Thunder-Goddess, just action. With a mighty punch, she smashed open the closet, and Sombra soon emerged from the splintered remains of it.
"Just so you know, you should probably get a new one of those," the Death-God commented.
Tempest shot him an annoyed look, then summoned a bolt of lightning, shooting it straight at the chains, shattering them.
"Tell Mac I'll help him make the next ones," she remarked.
Sombra turned to respond, only to find her now gone, whisked away by another barrage of lightning.
"...Woman of few words, isn't she?" he pondered.
Then, remembering why he was here, he turned to Filthy.
"Now then...where was I?"
Before Filthy even got a chance to explain his case, Sombra unceremoniously plunged his hand right into the guy's chest. But rather than pulling out blood or entrails from this move, he instead pulled out Filthy's soul, which glowed an ethereal blue as his now-empty body collapsed to the floor. The soul glanced around, looking to his own ghostly hands, before looking back to his wife and daughter.
"...I may be late for dessert."
With that, Sombra descended through the floor, taking his prisoner with him, and together, they journeyed straight down into the underworld. Filthy looked at this place, this destination for all mortals, with it's foreboding and imposing darkness and gloom, and within moments of arriving he was thrown to the ground, with Sombra landing more gracefully nearby.
"Welcomed to your new home, Filthy. Do get comfortable."
His tone was not an amused one, and Filthy knew that trying something with him was unwise. But soon, he realised that the Lord of the Underworld was not alone, as a second figure, a well-dressed woman with blue hair, was standing close by. Instantly, Filthy knew that this must be none other than the Queen of the Underworld, Radiant Hope, and he immediately threw together a plan. He fell to his knees, his hands clasped together in a praying motion, and spoke to her with deference.
"Oh, Lady Radiant! I seek your aid!"
Radiant raised an eyebrow.
"Do you now?"
Filthy nodded.
"My mortal shell was not buried in the proper way. I was given no final farewell to my wife and child."
Radiant nodded.
"Oh, I know. Your wife threw your body out into the street after my husband brought you here."
Filthy's voice dropped its fake tone here for a moment.
"What?! She really did desecrate my remains?! Why, that treacherous little...!"
Then, remembering what he was doing, he cleared his throat, putting on the most weasel-like smile anyone was capable of.
"Well...grant me reprieve from this underworld, and allow me some time back among the living to set my affairs in order and..."
"No," Radiant said firmly.
Filthy paused, Sombra smirked, and then the former finally got some words out.
"Um...pardon?"
Radiant folded her arms, looking to him impatiently.
"You murder thirteen people, then imprison my husband, and you expect me to offer you some help?"
Filthy considered that, his eyes darting left to right.
"...Yes?"
Radiant frowned, shaking her head, before stepping to one side. And it was here that Filthy noticed that she'd been standing next to a rather enormous boulder this entire time, which she soon patted with a satisfied look.
"Well, go on. Tom's not gonna roll himself up the mountain!"
Looking up, Filthy saw that, yes, there was indeed a mountain right next to the boulder, and he let his shoulders slump.
"Well...at least I'll be kept busy?"
He moved forward, struggling against the enormous weight of the boulder, all while Radiant walked over to her husband, who was looking to her amorously.
"Have I mentioned recently how much I love you, Radiant?"
Radiant stroked the side of his face.
"You could stand to mention it a bit more often."
Then she looked thoughtful.
"Hmmm...wonder how his family's taking this?"
"Mother?"
"Yes, Diamond?" Spoiled Rich responded.
"...Does this mean I get Father's stuff?"
Spoiled shook her head.
"No, my dear daughter...it means I get his stuff."
Celestia, after having witnessed all this transpire, had her face buried in her hands.
"How? How can my day get any more tiring?"
Stepping closer to her, Luna cleared her throat.
"Um, I hate to remind you sister, but...next week is your appointed...visit."
"...It got more tiring."