//------------------------------// // Shutter Bug // Story: Glimmering Guidance // by Amethyst_Crystal //------------------------------// Starlight Glimmer gazed into the trees. She contemplated their realism. “Hmm, maybe a little more swaying of branches in breezes, perhaps?” She was tinkering with her ‘nature meditation realm simulator’ again. A loud knock at the door startled her out of focus, bringing the decorative but very much indoor office into view once more. “Hello? Hello! Wow I guess I will just go inside because it does say ‘open’.” A pale green unicorn with a lady bug cutie mark and a burnt scarlet mane walked in, closing the door behind her, and somewhat oddly, locking it. She stared at the therapist with her bright green eyes. “I just wanted to stop by because, I need to talk with you, I have a problem….” a huge pained grin smeared across her face, leaning back and gazing harshly upon Starlight. “Uhhh...” Therapist Glimmer stumbled. “Ok. That’s good to know?” “Well, you’re supposed to be able to help, so I guess I’ll at least hear what you have to say!” She leapt until the couch and slouched, flicking her tail irritably. “Wait, aren’t you that photographer pony that took the faculty pictures for that newspaper?” Shutter Bug rolled her eyes. “Yeah yeah.” Starlight chuckled nervously. She felt something weird about this pony when they first met too. She was hyper and friendly and enthusiastic, but uniquely cold and dismissive towards Starlight. Could it be she’d done something to her, long ago…? Counselor Starlight slipped over to the desk, getting comfortable. “Ahem. So, how can I help you today?” The pale purple mare levitated a mug towards her guest. “Empathy Cocoa?” “Are you mocking me?!” snarled the green one, leaping up to her hooves, horn glowing. “What?!” Starlight nearly dropped the mug and set it down. “No, of course not! Why would you think that?” Shutter Bug crossed her arms. “Nothing, never mind!” she snorted. “I’m just mad at somepony who Destroyed! My! Life!” Starlight swallowed. “Mmhm, um. So… do you want to talk about that?” “What’s there to say? She was smug and arrogant!” shouted the pale mare, flailing arms. “She thought she knew better, thought she was more evolved than I! She didn’t even allow me any glory! How dare she! HOW DARE SHE!” Shutter Bug was pointing directly at Starlight now, frowning deeply into a mug of cocoa. “Uh huh. So, how did she dare?” Shutter Bug collapsed on the couch. “By taking EVERYTHING from me! All my plans, my hopes, my desires, ruined! RUINED!” and she went into a fit of hysterics. Starlight mumbled softly, “Wow.” Speaking more clearly, she leaned over with a smile. “Listen, even from ruins you can build something better. For example, the changelings’ entire society and culture was broken, and then it became something new. They are much kinder and nicer to everypony now. From the destruction of their old life they have built something more harmonious.” Turning to look away, as though troubled by an old memory, she continued, “I only wish their old Queen was willing to lead them still. Instead she left for something dark in her heart.” Shutter Bug trembled in place, her face a mask of hate, before warping into a wicked toothy smile, her voice dripping with venom. “Like revenge?” A chill ran down Starlight’s spine, and she got a very terrible thought, but then she put it away, where she wouldn’t have to think about it. Her suspicion would only distract from her counseling. “Keeping your mind on vengeance can hurt your heart. I would know. I became a broken pony, a dangerous reckless fool. I was not much better before that. When I was a terrible leader, because I hurt the ponies who trusted me, who looked up to me.” “Well...” Shutter Bug hesitated, looking back to the door, as though fearful or reluctant. “You’ve hurt me before, too...” Therapist Glimmer fell back in her chair, eyes wide. “Oh. I’m… I’m sorry, I… I…” Tears came up unabated, a struggle to wipe them away. She had not expected this part of her past to haunt her, not so suddenly. She did not recognize this mare at all, but there were so many innocents she had hurt, in their hearts and in their minds. Shutter Bug looked up with a hateful sneer, though it quirked, the pony squirming with emotion. “Are you really? Do you even know what you did to me? You took everything from me. Everything!” Starlight Glimmer put her fore-hooves on the ground, walked around the desk, and approached her client, tears streaming down. “What can I do to make it right?” Shutter Bug stared in surprise, scrunching up her nose and blushing. Clearly this was unexpected. “I, well..” Sighing and wiping away at her eyes again, Starlight turned away, putting a hoof to her chest, taking a deep breath…. Then breathing out, gently. “I need to atone. I don’t actively allow my past to crawl through my mind unabated anymore, dwelling accomplishes nothing, But when it comes back without my beckoning, how can I refuse? I cannot say I have become a better pony, if I cannot confront what I have done, when it comes right to me.” Shutter Bug looked away, frowning and mumbling irritably. “So you really are a leader.” Starlight shrugged a little, awkwardly. “I suppose I can be sometimes.” “Well you are brave to face me, after all you’ve done.” Shutter Bug frowned. “Now you just have to look at me.” Starlight stopped averting her eyes, purple windows staring right into Shutter Bug’s emerald pools. “I’m sorry for being terrible to you.” Shutter Bug smiled a little, amused perhaps. “Hmm. But what if I want revenge still?” Starlight Glimmer stood her ground. “If it involves hurting my friends, I will stop you.” Then she knelt down on all fours, bowing her head. “But if you just want me, then... I will do what you demand.” Shutter Bug threw her head back and laughed, and laughed, and laughed. Hysterical, wild, ancient laughter. “I am most pleased, for now.” she admitted. “To have you grovel before me is cathartic indeed.” Starlight Glimmer sighed deeply. She felt humiliated, worried. But she had to let go of her pride, for now. “I hope we can still be friends, someday...” Shutter Bug leaned in close, whispering into the soft pink ear. “You think you understand me, but you don’t. You threw away your leadership, why should I do the same with mine? Why should I sacrifice power for your friendship?” Starlight Glimmer looked up. That nagging suspicion again. “Because it is an addiction. It will never satisfy you. You will hurt, and you will hurt others, and you will never be satisfied. Instead, you could find ponies who really care about you, not for what you are, but for who you are! You just have to be willing to try friendship!” Shutter Bug gave a blood curdling hideous scream, a gurgling snarling wail, the therapist covering her eyes and shuddering on the floor with fear. “Curse you, Starlight Glimmer! Curse your tongue and your thoughts! You plague me with your offers of sweetness and compassion! Do you think I don’t want to be loved? I need everypony to love me!” Starlight rose up, getting in the other unicorn’s face. “I wanted that too! At any cost!” “Then why don’t you now?!” “I decided to care about the feelings and dreams of other ponies!” “You care! You? Ha! Hahahah!” Shutter Bug twisted around, collapsing onto the couch, laughing hysterically. Starlight got up off the floor, slumping back down in her chair with a sigh. “Yep, she’s clearly in late stages of villainous madness,” she sassed as super softly as possible. Finally her client snapped out of it. “Well your care is not wanted! It is annoying! I see how much happier you are now, but you don’t have power now! And so you are a fool!” Starlight shook her head. “I was a fool then, not now. Well, not always, anyway! I would much rather be your friend than your enemy.” Shutter Bug got up off the seat, frowning. “You know what I am most angry at you about? The loneliness. The dark cold loneliness, after feeling beloved for so long.” Heavy sadness dripped in the green unicorn’s voice. “I am without anypony. You knew that feeling too, once. I cannot forgive you as you forgave Twilight Sparkle.” “You don’t have to… at least, not yet… but eventually, we must all confront our pasts, so we can have a happier future.” Shutter Bug gave her nemesis one last cold stare. “If I give in, then it means you have won. That’s what I cannot allow.’ Glimmer grinned. “I prefer to think of it as both of us winning.” Shutter Bug frowned. “I don’t understand. I’m going now...” she hopped off the couch and approached the door. Starlight looked down, saddened. “Well, I understand you not wanting to stay longer than necessary. Please, take care of yourself.” Shutter Bug paused near the door, turning to look, glaring and grumbling, “Maybe we will talk again. I will consider it.” Starlight smiled and nodded, the last sight of Shutter Bug looking worried, as she left the office, mumbling to herself, “Instead of knowing my enemy better, I feel more confused...” Starlight sat back, staring at the kites on the ceiling. That pony, she had hurt her deeply. She hoped she could make things right, somehow. “Maybe I should find her later and offer a picnic with kite-flying. Too bad I didn’t even ask her name… unless I already know…“