Chapter Twelve
The rest of the dinner progressed smoothly from that point on; polite questions were directed towards Twilight and Swift-Pad, probing about how their lives were doing (to which she answered that she was doing fine), how their friends were doing, good as well though Twilight noticed that Blueblood shuddered when he heard Rarity’s name. She also saw Swift-Pad’s ear twitch at this, and had a pretty good idea of what he was thinking. Mentally, she promised to tell him about it as soon as possible.
As she continued her observations, she noticed that Swift-Pad’s ear flicked a bit faster when he was asked about his own friends, and wondered what that was about. Still, she decided not to pry too deeply as it was clear he didn’t want to say anything publicly.
Finally, as the meal drew to a close, Princess Celestia rose from her seat. “That was a wonderful meal, and I thank you all for attending,” she said. “And now, I feel we should adjourn for a short while. Ambassador Swift-Pad, Princess Twilight,” she said as she looked at the two. “The official signing ceremony will take place in one hour.”
“I shall be there, your Grace,” Swift-Pad said.
“As shall I,” Twilight added as she stood up and walked towards the door where Pinkie Pie was waving her over. Twilight wasn’t sure how she managed not to react to the sight but she did with what she hoped was proper grace and confidence. Stepping into the hallway, she found herself quickly dragged off into a smaller dining room where all her friends were waiting eagerly. Looking over the table, she could see trays of hayburgers and hay fries, along with assorted other items that Twilight thought the various nobles would refer to, rather snootily, as ‘commoner fare’. She could also tell that her friends had quite enjoyed them, judging by how much had been eaten already, and briefly considered joining in. Then she mentally shook her head - much as she liked what was there, she’d already eaten enough to satisfy herself.
“So how did it go, Twi?” Rainbow Dash asked eagerly, rocking in her seat as she put a hayburger on her Manechurian plate.
“Well enough,” Twilight replied as she sat down, giving Rarity a look as her friend was trying to levitate a brush and some mane products over to her. “Really?”
“A little touch up never hurts, darling,” Rarity replied with an innocent smile on her face.
Twilight shook her head in exasperation, but allowed the other mare to work on her.
“So tell us, how was it?” Rarity asked as she examined Twilight’s mane, with a few muttered surprises that seemed to bode well for Twilight.
“I could have done without one of the ponies being present, but on the other hoof, I think you and Swift-Pad will get along even better once he finds out about your dislike for the pony in question,” Twilight replied. “His dislike of Prince Blueblood is for very different reasons, but it’s something you two definitely have in common.”
“Ah can’t believe that varmint done got Swift-Pad annoyed that fast,” Applejack said before coughing after seeing Rarity’s pointed look.
“Actually, his dislike predates Rarity’s,” Twilight replied. “The wolves have had it out for his family since the time of Blueblood’s great-grandfather - he insulted them rather badly at one point, and since they haven’t been able to make him pay for his insult...”
“An’ they want to make his descendents pay?” Applejack asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Given the insult, I don’t blame them,” Twilight told her. “Besides, Blueblood offends them all on his own just by acting like himself.”
“Now that I cannot doubt in the least,” Rarity said. “But… just what did that stallion do? The other Blueblood, I mean.”
Twilight took a deep breath. “He deliberately called them ‘backwood hicks’ and a few other things, and they’ve been out for blood ever since.”
There was a round of startled exclamations, but Twilight raised a hoof. “At any rate, I’m hoping Equestria can make up for it soon, and I plan to personally take charge of that.”
Applejack harrumphed. “Can’t say as Ah blame them,” she said. “So, what else?”
“Not much else, I am afraid,” Princess Celestia said as she sauntered into the room and made a beeline for the leftover food spread on the table, already levitating a plate and adding a number of eyebrow raising items onto it. “Those dinners tend to be very stuffy and very little is actually said. I am also hoping I can trust you girls not to inform anypony that I am taking a small break from my diet,” she said as she added another box of hayfries onto her plate with a completely straight face. “Though I have to admit, I am very impressed you managed to get yourself an invitation to the Packlands. We have been trying to reopen our embassy for years to no avail and even Luna has been stonewalled in her attempts to set up a simple diplomatic meet and greet since she returned.”
Since Rarity had finished her work, Twilight bowed. “I think the fact that we’ve gotten to know one another helped,” she said. “I have… some idea of why they haven’t been willing to meet with Luna yet, but I’m not certain and don’t want to say anything until I am.” She considered. “As for myself, I have shown my willingness to learn and to respect the wolves’ culture, and that of others. At the very least, Swift-Pad knows that in that regard, I am nothing like the last several ponies who entered their lands.”
“And on that topic,” Celestia cast a glance at the rest of her friends and suddenly the atmosphere changed completely. “I suspect that all of you will be invited to join Twilight as well, being her close friends. While I am sure that Twilight will be given diplomatic immunity due to being a leader of another nation, the rest of you will more than likely not have such protection. So you will need to know their laws and customs to avoid any faux pas.” She turned her head towards Rainbow Dash. “If you do go, miss Dash, you will have to remember that they do not look well on weather manipulation or any basic cloud manipulation for that matter, which means you cannot buck any clouds or move them without proper approval from the pack-leaders who control that terrority.”
“Already had a talk about that with Swift-Pad the other day,” Rainbow Dash said. “I know to behave myself. Unlike those idiots who try to cause trouble at the border.”
Celestia simply nodded her head and then turned to Fluttershy but before she could even start, Fluttershy nodded in turn and let out a few small growls, prompting Celestia to blink in surprise.
“You know the wolf language?” she asked.
Fluttershy nodded. “I made a point to learn about it,” she said. “Swift-Pad isn’t the first wolf of the civilized packs that I’ve met. I found one of his people coming out of the woods near my home a long time ago, who had been on what he called a meditation journey. He taught me about their culture, and about the differences between they and the wild wolves.”
“Then you have a decided advantage,” Celestia told her. “I am pleased.”
She then turned to Pinkie Pie from the blushing Fluttershy. “To be perfectly honest, I am not certain what to say to you,” she said. “Quite frankly, you are so far different from any wolf I have ever met…”
Pinkie shrugged. “It’s all good. Swifty and I get along just fine; I think I confuse him, but then again I confuse most people. And yeah, I know I can be overwhelming - I have my good days and my bad days. So I think I can handle myself or trust the girls to stop me if I get too out of hoof.”
“Quite.” Celestia looked at Rarity. “In your case, I feel I should warn you, your special talent would make you very… desirable by the wolves.”
“So I have been informed,” Rarity said. “I would be delighted to make arrangements to help them find more of their desired minerals, so long as they ask politely. And may I assume they do not take kindly to attempted, er… allocation of their stones without making arrangements first?”
“That is correct,” Celestia said. “It would be wise to ask before so much as touching one.”
“I shall keep that in mind,” Rarity replied with a faint blush.
Next, Celestia faced Applejack. “As with Rainbow Dash, I will remind you that they do not look well on the use of magic in the growth of their crops, and ask that you not do so while there without any permission.”
“Only magic we really have in our crops is for the Zap Apples, and that’s all in the seeds,” Applejack replied lightly. “Rest of it’s done with just the sweat of our brows and the strength of our backs. ‘Less we have a surge, but Ah haven’t had that problem since Ah was younger than Apple Bloom.”
“Good.” Finally, Celestia turned to Spike and looked contemplative. “As with Rarity, I would advise you to restrain yourself around their gems.”
“Learned that lesson when Owlowiscious came to live with us,” Spike said. “And after seeing what happens if one of their runes goes kerflooey? Last thing I want is to bite into one of those suckers.”
“I’m surprised that one of Swift-Pad’s runes malfunctioned; from what I heard he was a rather comptent rune-wolf.”
“Er, it wasn’t one of his runes that malfunctioned,” Twilight said, blushing. “He’s taught me how to make some, and I messed up the first few times.”
“Really?” Celestia’s eyebrow raised at that and turned to look at Twilight. “I’m very surprised to hear that. They usually prefer to keep their magic, and certain other aspects of themselves, a secret from most outsiders.”
“He gave me a book about them,” Twilight replied. “I’m not allowed to share it or its contents though.”
Celestia’s eyebrow arched further. “You have been given a most precious gift then,” she said. “I am impressed, Twilight. It would seem that in just two days, you have accomplished more for our relations with the wolves than any other ponies I have known in hundreds of years.”
Twilight simply blushed at that, and felt herself starting to look off to the side before she remembered what Swift-Pad had taught her and brought her focus back to Celestia. “I am only doing what I feel is right; learning more about our neighbours and hopefully building better friendships. It is what you sent me to Ponyville to learn after all.”
Celesia just beamed at that and looked extremely proud.
“That reminds me,” Twilight said. “Speaking of our neighbors, do we have any kind of formal relationship with the Dragon Lands?”
Celestia looked at her in surprise. “Not really. We stay out of their way, and for the most part they stay out of our areas, except on rare occasions like the one you all had to deal with.” She nodded briefly to Fluttershy. “There’s never been a formal embassy with them because they just aren’t interested, and some have been downright hostile. The Dragon Lord has never sanctioned any of these hostilities, mind, at least not according to the few individuals we had opportunity to question.”
Twilight nodded. “Well, apparently they’ve talked with the wolves from time to time… Swift-Pad said he had counterparts there.”
“I am not surprised.” Celestia shook her head. “The wolves do tend to get along with other races better than we do… not for lack of trying on my part, of course.” She looked curious. “What brought this up?”
“Well, we were talking about the last few dragons Spike and I had met, and Swift-Pad got so angry when he heard what those teenage ones were up to… he promised to send word to his counterparts there so they’d tell the Dragon Lord, and then Garble and his cronies could be punished.”
Celestia looked thoughtful. “Ah, the incident with the dragon migration. Philomena was positively furious when she found out. I told her when Spike and I were writing back and forth about it,” she explained. “She’ll be pleased to hear about this.”
“Ah’m sorry but do we really have that bad relatin’s out there?” Applejack asked. “Ah know what Swift-Pad said, but… not that Ah doubt him, but Ah can’t believe everyone hates us for some reason or another.”
“The situation is complicated but every nation has had their own grievances towards us and others,” Celestia said wearily. “The yaks, for instance, withdrew into their own borders over a thousand moons ago, and haven’t communicated with the outside world since. They tend to be very… sensitive about almost anything, which is one of the reasons most nations have just let them be, rather than risk offending them. The dragons too have tended to keep to themselves, as do the diamond dogs and the griffon kingdoms. For that matter...” She pursed her lips. “We haven’t heard from the Hippogriff kingdom in a very long time. They were once friendly with us, but long before any of you were ever born, they suddenly recalled their ambassador, and there’s been no word since. Their ambassador did say it was matters back home and nothing we had done, but still…” She trailed off, a worried look on her face. “We will need to make a better effort into understanding what exactly happened and hopefully bring the world out of its isolationist mindset we are all in.”
“Well what about the buffalos? I mean I know how ticked off they were by us claiming some of their land, because supposedly we didn’t know it was already theirs,” Rainbow Dash asked with Celestia wincing.
“We are still trying to unravel that little tangle,” she said. “We have launched a full investigation into exactly how those land deeds were written up in first place, let alone sold to those settlers. There is some suspicion that it was done as a deliberate attempt at sabotaging both sides, but no concrete proof.”
“Who would want to sabotage our relationships with other nations?” Fluttershy asked nervously. “And why?”
“It could be any number of things. Old prejudices, simple egotism, attempting to keep alliances from being formed so they could have a strong position when they launched their own coup someday…” Celestia sighed. “Even simple malevolence towards others for no real reason, as horrifying as that idea is. Also, there have been many who have opposed us over the years and this would be a form of diplomatic revenge by making what other nations think of us true.” Celestia tilted her head to the side. “It could also be a genuine error in the paperwork.” She then tilted her head to the other side. “Or it could be someone trying to make a tidy profit in scamming unexpecting ponies. It would not be the first time such things have happened nor would it be the last.”
Applejack let out a growl. “An’ I know just the no-good-snakes-in-the-grass who’d do such a thing,” she said.
“If you mean the pair who tried to scam your family out of their land, we’re keeping an eye on those two,” Celestia said. “While they are not staying honest, they are doing their best to keep from attracting too much suspicion, and we haven’t caught them attempting any land deals since they left Ponyville.” She gave the younger mare a look. “Distasteful as their methods may be, everypony has a right to make a living, and they have yet to actually break any laws that would warrant an arrest. At least, none that we can prove.”
“Selling false land deeds ain’t a crime?”
“We have examined one of their land deeds agreement and it does say in the fine print that these lands might not actually be available to be bought, they are to check upon them themselves and other little details that have protected them from prosecution. While there have been attempts to close some of the legal loopholes, including legislating size on the text so as to ensure it’s readable without requiring ocular assistance, they are very hard to get through.” Celestia snorted. “I once found a contract with two sets of clauses that were so small, they required our best microscopes to even know they were there, but as long as they were there, they were legal once the contract was signed. I have seen other tricks with contracts that were just as sneaky… though I am glad to say that we proved one of those in particular constituted fraud, since the first copy of the contract signed was the only copy they actually read, while the others were not identical. We were able to prosecute the one responsible, and see to it that justice was served.”
“Do you have to deal with that often?” Rarity asked.
“Constantly.” Celestia did not look pleased. “It is one of the least pleasant aspects of my duties, and one of the reasons I have an entire staff of lawyers to help with my work.” She then turned to Twilight. “You have some years to go before you are to begin your legal studies so that you can handle any legal matter. As of now, all you can do is advise our ponies, Twilight. If anypony tries to bring you a bill, law, prospal or any legal contract, no matter how beneficial or well intended it sounds, you are fully expected to forward them on to myself or my legal staff to handle until you have received the proper training.”
“Understood,” Twilight said, bowing her head and using her magic to retrieve the plate of junk foods Celestia had gathered for herself. “I’m sorry, Princess Celestia but as you said, you are on a diet and I would not be a good friend if I were to let you eat this. That and I think Luna would be cross with me if I were to let you do this.”
Celestia let out a nicker, but then shook her head in resignation. “Fair point, Twilight. But I must advise you, not all my diets have been equal. I once spent a year on what I called a seafood diet.”
“Oh?” Twilight looked at her curiously. “Any fish in particular?”
Celestia chuckled. “As I told somepony back then when they asked, my seafood diet was not as one would expect from the name.”
“Then… what was it?”
“It was actually a ‘see-food’ diet. I see food, I eat it.”
Pinkie Pie started laughing hysterically. “That’s genius!”
Celestia smiled at her. “I thought so too… but then I had to spend several years working off all the weight I put on.” Her expression turned more serious. “Regrettably, I think we have gotten somewhat off track. As I said before, I am very impressed with your progress Twilight.”
Twilight smiled. “I may be an alicorn now, but I will always have more to learn… and one day, maybe, to teach myself.”
There was a whispered “Egghead” from Rainbow Dash, but Twilight ignored it. “At any rate, thank you for giving me this opportunity, Princess.”
“The pleasure has always been mine,” Celestia told her. “I just wish more ponies I knew were as fond of learning and broadening their horizons as you are.”
Spike chuckled. “Yeah, some of Twilight’s old classmates certainly were like that… of course, I still think Twilight would have had more fun if she’d spent more time studying with some of them outside of school.” He blinked. “Speaking of, I don’t think either of us have been back to your old tower since we first came to Ponyville. I kept meaning to go back and straighten up the place, but what with one thing after another, I never had time.”
“I thought you would have already done that Twilight,” Pinkie Pie spoke up.
“No…” Twilight shook her head. “It never even occurred to me. In fact, I think I must have left out that copy of Predictions and Prophecies I was studying that day.” She looked at Spike. “Thank you for reminding me, I’ll get right on it… after we get done with today’s meetings.”
“I’d love to see it myself, darling,” Rarity spoke up. “If you don’t mind, of course.”
Twilight smiled. “You’re all welcome to come. It’s… probably more than a little messy though.”
“Eh, can’t be worse than some of the dorm rooms I’ve seen,” Rainbow Dash said. “Some of the guys there were real slobs… up until about ten minutes before room inspections, then they turned into neat freaks just long enough that they wouldn’t get tossed out.”
“As is always the case,” Celestia said with a weary sigh. “I remember visiting Blueblood’s room when he was younger, and it took all my self-control not to immediately summon every maid in the castle to come and deal with it.”
“Somehow, that does not surprise me,” Rarity said.
Fluttershy flicked her ears. “Zephyr was like that too…”
Twilight looked at her curiously. “Who?”
“My little brother, Zephyr Breeze.” Fluttershy ducked her head. “I… don’t like to talk about him much.”
Twilight blinked, then turned to Rainbow Dash. “Are you the only one of my friends without a brother or sister? Besides Scootaloo, that is - I know how you two feel about one another.”
“Yup.” Rainbow Dash nodded. “Only child growing up. Not that my folks didn’t want at least one more, but it just never happened. ‘S why they kept cheering me on and encouraging me so much - I was the only chance they had to do that kind of thing.”
Pinkie wrapped her front legs around Rainbow Dash. “Aww… I can’t imagine growing up without any brothers or sisters. I’ve got three! Two big, and one just a few minutes littler than me!”
Twilight blinked. “You’re a twin? But… I saw your family portrait! You’re the only pink one! So who...”
“Yuppers!” Pinkie nodded eagerly. “Marble’s a lot quieter and shyer and grayer than I am. Kind of like a mix of Mac and Fluttershy and a rock.”
Applejack chuckled. “You think Mac’s quiet now, you should have heard him back when we were younger. Couldn’t get him to stop talkin’ for nothin’, back in the days before Apple Bloom was born. There’s a whole long story there about how he finally learned to think before he spoke, but Ah don’t think we’ve got time for it now. Maybe later, after things are done here.”
“I’ll keep it in mind,” Twilight promised. “For now, I think I will just do what I came in here for and relax.”
“An excellent idea,” Celestia said with a smile and exited the room, though not before snitching one packet of hay fries from the plate Twilight still held. Watching her go, Twilight shook her head in bemusement, then turned back to her friends to chat some more.