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// What's Better Than Art? Pizza 
// Story: Smooth Criminal 
// by dudenotactive 
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Canterlot's art museum, a place where every ponies could enjoy the works of famous artists throughout history of Equestria, even a few from other countries as well. Nothing shows unity more than sharing the artistic views with each other.

But Brie Cheese isn't really interested in all that, all he cares about are his family and friends, also cheese. So why is he flying with a bag filled with three boxes of pizza to the museum? Well, when he was visiting the nightclub this morning, Roman quickly ropes Brie into his schemes to rob said museum. 

At first he wanted to decline and keep his hooves clean of any crime, but Roman promised to pay a large amount of bits, and that wasn't the icing on the cake. The criminal knew about Brie's problem, Roman told him that he could keep Brie's business afloat with a few advise, seeing an opportunity to not only earn some bits, but to get his business back in action, he gladly accepted.

So that was his story, being tempted by money, the root of all evil. He chuckles lightly as he reaches the entrance, he had to admit that the architecture was nice, it seem to be inspired by Cloudsdale's history with the arches. There were also marble columns along the front walls, at the large arch way were two large marble statue of a pegasus and an earth pony, they stand opposite of each other as if they were ready to clash.

Brie Cheese was so focused on the design of the museum that he didn't notice that he was about to bump into one of the security guards. "Hey, watch it!"

"Oh, sorry!" He quickly steps back.

The guard notices the thing Brie was carrying. "Sir, food and drinks are not allowed in the museum." The guard warns him.

Brie nervously shuffled on the spot. "B-but a pony ordered three boxes of hay pizza a few hours ago, said to deliver it here, sir." He swallows down the lump in his throat, his acting skills aren't as good as the criminal he had become acquainted to, but thank the heavens that the guard bought it.

The guard placed a hoof on his face, groaning loudly. "That idiot, this has their name written all over it. Alright, but we can't go through the front, so follow me."

'Roman was right, we are a bit too trusting.' Brie thinks to himself while following the guard around the back of the museum. He was soon led to the back where a large metal door was, it could fit three wagons through it, there was also an ordinary metal door next to it which was also what the guard was going for.

He gave the metal door a few knocks before a mare answered from behind it. "Who is it?"

"It's me, the pizza you ordered is here you dunce."

"Pizza? I didn't order pizza."

"Then why is the pizza pony here!?"

"I don't know, maybe you ordered it!" The pony behind the door argues back, this goes on for a few minutes, going back and fort on who to blame.

Meanwhile, Brie secretly takes out Roman's scroll and tucks it in his wing, but not before taking a picture of the back entrance. 

Roman had taught him on how to use it before he left, his mission was to gather enough information about the museum, at first he had a hard time getting used to holding the device with his wing, but after a few practice he could finally hold it long enough to take a picture.

Brie also had manage to take a peak of his 'gallery', he decided not to continue further after seeing the most recent picture.

He returns his attention to the arguing ponies, they were still at it. "How about you pay for it!" The guard he was with shouted to the mare behind the door once more.

"You know what!? Fine!!" The metal door swings out revealing an angry mare. "I'll pay for the stupid pizza!" She said before going deeper inside the building.

"Ugh, that idiot sometimes." He turns to Brie who was awkwardly staring at the pavement. "Just-just follow her..."

Wasting no time, Brie quickly chase after the mare, ready to gather everything Roman needs. The mare was obviously leading him to their staff room, this was all going well.

After a few minutes of awkward silence they both arrived in the staff room, it was just a simple room with lockers at one side, a table at the middle, and a row of kitchen countertops on the opposite side of the lockers. But what really catch Brie's interest was a blackboard with names and schedule, just across the table.

"Yeah, just place it right on the table there, I'll go get your money." The mare said before walking over to one of the lockers.

Doing as he was told, Brie approaches the table and place the three boxes as so, the mare was still busy trying to open her locker so Brie Cheese took the chance to get closer to the board. Wasting no time he quickly took a pic of the guard shifts.

"What are you doing?"

His head snaps back at the other pony in the room, keeping the device in his wing as hidden as possible.

"N-nothing!" A strange smile was on his face, trying hard not to crumble under pressure.

The staff rolled her eyes. "Okay, how much for the pizzas?"

Brie was going to say '224 bits' the voice of Roman echoes in his mind. "If they ask how much it cost, try and milk the situation."

"Ahem. It's 448 bits ma'am."

"Wait, I only have 300 bits!" The guard slaps a hoof on her face. "That idiot, if he wanted pizza so much he could have just bought one box!"

Well so much for trying to milk the situation, but another idea came to his mind. "Well, how about I let you have these," He motions his hoof towards the boxes. "if you let me in the art museum for free."

The mare gave him a look of confusion. "You would give away pizza just to be in an art museum?" Wow, it even sounds absurd when she says it.

"W-well, I always wanted to visit this place, but I was always too busy." A forced smile was now on his face, his cheeks aches a little from it.

A few seconds passes before she shrugs her shoulders. "I'm not really suppose to do something like that, but alright, as long as you don't tell anypony."

"Lips are sealed." The mare then leaves the room with Brie Cheese following her. 

Both of them were quiet along the way, he didn't really want to strike up a conversation, and he still needed to focus on the task he was given.

After minutes of silence between the two, they both exited the staff only area and entered the art gallery. Giving the mare a nod, Brie continues alone to enjoy the exhibits, he could still feel the mare's eyes focusing on him as if she was trying to figure something out.

The pressure on Brie grew stronger, he has to be even more discreet as he could. 

There were many things that could be sold for a lot of bits, but Brie isn't browsing, he was looking for a crack in the metaphorical fortress. There just right above him was a dome skylight, that was definitely an information. Isn't it?

Looking around even more, he notices that there were monkeys on some corners of the building, honestly, he has no idea what they are for.

"Why are there monkeys here?" He quietly said to himself, sadly there was a pony nearby who had heard him. Seeing his mistake, he slowly turn his head to the pony, and when his red eyes meet brown ones, Brie loudly exhaled as if he was screaming.

The earth pony, a tall gray mare with black slick back mane, a few gray spots, she wore a fitting black suit with a white buttoned shirt and a yellow polka dotted blue tie. But what really stands out was her blank behind, it was rare to find anyone like that in their age.

The older pony, Brie was sure she was at least fifty, clears her throat ceasing Brie Cheese's silent screaming.

"Are you done?" Brie nodded, his cheeks slightly red from embarrassment. "Very well then, if you were curious, these animals are an experiment of a new form of security."

"Excuse me if I come off as rude, but what can monkeys do?"

"These particular species are called howler monkeys, and as their name suggested, they howl extremely loud to alert the nearest guard post. And believe me when I say they are loud, sadly this is still an experiment to see if it is effective."

Now Brie was impressed, who would have thought that teaching some monkeys could help society. But this would seriously affect Roman's plan, he sure does hope he has something to counter this.

"Thanks for the information, do you work here?"

"No, I was just here to see a painting that I have always loved. Would you like to see also?" The old mare asked, the corner of her mouth slightly twitches up at the mention of the painting.

Seeing that there was nothing wrong with that, Brie accepted her offer. He followed her, on their way, Brie had given a few of the exhibits a look. Some of it were impressive, like a large statue of a pegasus in ancient armor holding a shield, though they were moving away he had managed to read the plaque, Flash Magnus.

He mentally noted to himself to go back later to see if there was more about the pony. They both soon stand in front of the painting the mare wanted to show, the painting depicted a unicorn with a curved red horn standing menacingly on a black crystal as his red cape flow with the wind.

Brie Cheese felt a shiver going along his spine, the painting radiates with complete fear and the eyes alone, those hatred filled eyes that was glaring at him were enough to paralyze the pony. Only when the old mare beside him spoke that broke him out of the trance.

"What do you think?" She asks the shivering stallion.

"W-what do I think?" He mimic her question. "Don't wanna be rude, but that is the most terrifying thing I have ever seen."

If she was offended, it did not show. "That is what everypony expresses after they have seen my painting. Fear."

Now Brie felt even more fear, he was scared that he accidentally insulted an artist's work. "Well it's still impressive, like the way you uh... made this so realistic! I mean, being frightened by painting alone is awesome, but the way you painted it looks like a regular picture."

"No need to do that, but I am thankful for your words." Brie gave out a sigh of relied, but sucks it back in his lungs after what she says next. "Now that is out of the way, may I ask that you tell your boss to take this one aswell when he begins his work."

Now the stallion was really panicking, from out of nowhere she just started talking about Roman even though he didn't mention him at all, and thank god there were nobody nearby to hear their conversation.

Brie looks around before leaning closer to whisper. "How did you know!?"

"I shall tell your boss when he brings  the painting and the rest of his bounty to me at this address,-" She hands him a card with the name 'Lucky Spice' and an address. "-also tell him not to disappoint me, I would love to read about him on tomorrow's papers."

With that, the pony that is now named Lucky Spice made her leave for the exit and leaving a nervous and confused Brie.

After she had left, Brie quickly but discreetly head for the exit, he passes by both the museum guards he had met, good thing they were too busy arguing to notice him. After hitting the streets he flared his wings and flew to the nightclub as fast he can, but unlike his sister Cheddar Blaze, he was far slower than her.

At the thought of his family member, he comes to a slow, now that he think about it more he could see the disappointed look his family will have if they find out about his connection with the thief of Canterlot. Fear, he was frightened by the possibility and the painting that haunted his thoughts returned, but his mind became clear as the weather today when he remembered the promise Roman had made.

With his mind on one thing only, he flew faster, racing against himself to reach Roman. Nearing the nightclub, Brie choose not to slow down but to crash through the doors, he bounces up from the floor once and rolled straight into the bar counter making the drinks shake slightly.

"Scarlet, Scarlet, Scarlet!" He calls out to the mare. "Where's Roman!!?"