//------------------------------// // Ship Shape (Pony-Me™) // Story: The League of Sweetie Belles // by GMBlackjack //------------------------------// “Hold onto your butts!” Swip called, performing a complex series of corkscrews and loop de loops around a volley of plasma bolts, dodging most and absorbing the rest with her shields. She weaved in and out with surprising grace and speed, toying with the angular black ships of alien attackers. Nira was thrown out of bed by the sharp adjustments, landing flat against the wall. She let out a groan as she slid down, landing on her pile of tomes of forbidden knowledge. It had been her personal book fort of tomes of forbidden knowledge, but such art had been destroyed long before by the crazy antics of Swip. Groggy, Nira forced herself to walk to her sink. She pressed a button, ordering a cup of coffee. She was too tired to realize how bad of an idea this was. The coffee was bumped just enough to dump the scalding liquid onto the unicorn’s face, sizzling as it made contact with her coat. To her credit, Nira didn’t flinch in pain - she just sighed, cleaning herself up with a spell. She trotted out of her room and went to the bridge. “There better be a good explanation for this.” “There’s not,” Squiddy muttered, pulling on her tentacles in frustration. “We’re engaging space-bullies,” Seren offered, bouncing up and down - an act that prompted her to fall over when Swip made a sharp adjustment. “There are better ways to do that,” Squiddy countered. “Portal from a distance, magic blast… Swip was just bored. She hasn’t even taken a shot yet!” “And I’m still winning!” Swip reported, drawing attention to the combat display. Already she was tricking the black, angular ships into shooting each other. “Heh. These idiots don’t know what they’re doing. This is laughable.” “I’m not laughing,” Squiddy muttered. Nira smirked. “I am. Haven’t had the opportunity to see our superiority in action for a while.” “Our superiority is a joke. We’re only superior when we choose our ene-WAUGH!” Swip did a triple helix maneuver through the alien attackers, scraping the edge of one of them with her shields. “Woo-hoo!” “...Is it possible for a ship to have adrenaline?” Celia wondered, strolling onto the bridge. She was easily able to stand despite the constant rocking and twisting of Swip, making her the envy of everyone aside from Suzie - who had her feet locked to the floor at her console. “I can sure simulate it!” Swip announced. “WOOHOO! Take that you overgrown piece of scrap metal!” Cinder came flying through the bridge entrance, landing on the main screen like a pancake. “...Ow.” Nira levitated her down. “No, you don’t have to be worried. Yes, Swip is being ‘awesome’.” Cinder giggled. “Am I that easy to read?” “Yes.” “Alright then!” She turned to the screen. “Anything we can do, Swip?” “Watch in awe!” Swip declared, speeding around the ships in an ever-shrinking circle. Squiddy put a hand to the bridge of her nose. “I thought we didn’t have a Trixie…” “All of us have a little Trixie in us,” Celia observed. “ESPECIALLY THE GREAT AND POWERFUL BURGERBELLE!” Burgerbelle declared, wearing a full Trixie outfit. There was a large bump, tossing everyone but Celia and Suzie to the ceiling. The Sweeties fell back down in an awkward flump. “Suzie, do something…” Squiddy moaned. “Oh, all right,” Suzie said, not even trying to hide her amused smile. “Swip, wrap it up.” “Yes ma’a-” Swip’s voice abruptly cut out to static and then silence. All the lights inside her turned off, replaced with the automatic red emergency signals. Every screen without its own secluded power source died in an instant. The consistent hum of the engines ended and the gravity turned off, prompting the Sweeties to start drifting into the air. “...Swip?” NIra asked, concerned. There was no response. “Disengage foot clamps,” Suzie said - not at all surprised to find that her feet were still rooted to the floor. “Right. Does anyone have a report?” Burgerbelle and Celia shook their heads. “We have no way to tell anyth-” They heard a loud crunch as something smashed into Swip at high speed, sending the ship flipping end over end. The rotational energy forced all the free Sweeties to the walls, providing a lot of bruises. “...Shields are down,” Burgerbelle observed. “Thank you captain obvious,” Suzie muttered under her breath. “Okay, Nira, we need a dimens-” Swip was shot again, the sharp vertigo rushing all the blood to Suzie’s head. She managed to remain conscious through this - but not through the rotational reversal happening all of a second later. ~~~ “Yes ma’am,” Swip said, pushing herself to her limits. And then nothing happened. It was as if the world had frozen. She wondered for a second if this was what crashing felt like, then she realized that if she were really crashing she wouldn’t be able to think about it. There was a sharp monotone noise that shot pain into her. Pain? I don’t have the pain receptors on… “CONNECTION LOST, PLEASE TRY AGAIN LATER.” The shockingly loud - and alien - voice made Swip jump to her feet. In her delirium, she smacked her head on a nearby wall, driving a splitting headache into her groggy mind. She groaned, rubbing the sore spot with the back of her hand. Wait. Feet? Head!? HAND!? Swip forced herself to stop moving and just take in all the information she could. It was a painfully slow process, but her newfound sense of touch did its job. She had feet, two legs, two arms, and a head with decently long hair. Human, for sure. There was nothing but blackness in her mind. Was she blind? She touched her face with her free hand, finding the sensation of air moving across her skin to be unnerving. She soon found that she wasn’t blind - she just had something strapped to her head. Awkwardly, she pulled the bulky black thing off her head, prompting light to shoot into her eyes. The overabundance of white forced tears out, but she refused to blink. She would face the light because it wasn’t about to win. How can humans live with these inefficient eyes!? The room she was in had a single bed and a few pieces of simple furniture lining the bare walls. Behind the bed was a large machine with a small text-based interface currently displaying an error message. Several wires and tubes snaked out of the machine, toward Swip. Half went directly into Swip’s biologically human body, weaving through the folds in her medical gown, while the other half went into the thing that had been on her head. Swip wasn’t stupid. She knew what a virtual reality headset was. Clearly, she had been in a complex VR simulation produced by the machine, which also provided her body with all the nutrients it needed to function. Something had clearly gone wrong, and she’d been pulled out of the simulation. It was the logical conclusion, and the first one she made. If only it didn’t make her so livid. “What in the fresh hell is going on!?” she shouted. Finding no answer forthcoming, she angrily grabbed the headset and smashed it into the ground, prompting it to split into a dozen pieces, revealing complex circuitry. Swip was used to just knowing what all sorts of circuitry meant. She could just access her database and figure out how everything worked. All she was doing now was staring at the chips on the ground with a blank mind. She subconsciously clenched her fists - hard enough to cause a mild pain. The sensation drew her attention, prompting her eyes to register the existence of a name band on her wrist. Sarah Neuman. Swip twitched. She angrily ripped the name band off her wrist, ripping a paper cut in her arm. The sight of blood at first made her afraid - afraid of her frailty, of her body’s capacity to be damaged. This quickly returned to rage; rage that anyone would weaken her. With a roar, she grabbed the cables that connected her body to the machine and ripped them out. Several sparks erupted from the machine, as well as some organic fluid that presumably kept her fed. Smoke began to rise, triggering a smoke alarm. Swip was soon doused in water, but she didn’t care. She had beaten the machine. It no longer held sway over her - she was her own person and… and… And now she felt very lightheaded. It probably wasn’t a good idea to rip all those wires out at once. She tried to pass out on her bed, but she wasn’t exactly the most coordinated of human beings. She managed to trip and fall fllat on the floor, blacking out as the sprinkler rained on her frail form. ~~~ Celia knew what she needed to do - and she needed to do it fast, or they were going to be little more than space junk. While all the others were being tossed around hard enough to make it difficult to move - with the possible exception of Nira - Celia was able to keep her balance and firm footing. Celia jumped to the ‘ceiling’ of the bridge, popping open one of Swip’s primary access panels. She prodded a touchscreen interface with her hoof - getting nothing. “What are you doing?” Nira asked as she tried to use her dark magics to create a makeshift shield around Swip. She was having only marginal success. “Don’t worry about me,” Celia said, her crystal shimmering with a brilliant light. “Here goes nothing…” She pressed her crystal directly into the interface, creating a physical link between herself and Swip’s systems. Her eyes opened wide, her irises and pupils replaced by rapidly scrolling lines of digital information. Swip was gone. There was no evidence of an intelligence in the computer at all. The systems remained, but without a brain to control them. Celia pushed her near-panic at Swip’s disappearance out of her mind and focused on becoming the brain for the ship. Her first order was to turn the shields back on, a move that saved the reactor from a lucky shot. She did not try to activate the engines or fire any weapons - she didn’t know enough about the protocols or the state of the ship to try that, she might just blow everything up. What she did do was open a small portal and release a distress call directly to Celestia City. She spammed it since she wasn’t sure how to mark it urgent. Naturally the Merodi Universalis Military overcompensated, sending a full warship into the universe with enough weapons active to devastate multiple cities. This particular warship looked vaguely like a curved lobster riddled with magic spikes, all glowing with immense power. The alien ships took one look at the behemoth of a dreadnaught and fled. They didn’t make it far - the lobster-ship easily disabled their engines, sending them adrift. Celia had no way to know this since she hadn’t bothered to turn on the sensors. She just knew they weren’t being hit anymore, so she disengaged herself from Swip’s systems, allowing her to become aware of her splitting headache. “Ergh…” “Did it… work?” Nira asked. “I think so. Try to hail them using your communicator, I don’t think they know we’re alive.” Nira nodded, pulling out her phone. “This is Nira transmitting on all frequencies. We are disabled and…” she glanced around at the Sweeties, most of whom were either out cold or barely clinging to consciousness. “...we need medical attention. This includes our ship. Get us to the LSB hangar stat.” Then Nira realized she was talking to Yellow Diamond. Probably not the best person to be giving short to-the-point orders to. “...I keep bailing you Sweeties out,” Yellow muttered, pressing a few buttons. “I hope this isn’t going to keep being a pattern.” Nira sighed. “Just get us there, please?” “Opening direct wormhole. Medical team should be expecting you. Any losses?” “U… unknown,” Nira said with a gulp. “Something happened to Swip.” Yellow nodded slowly, pressing a final button. A portal opened that led directly to the League of Sweetie Belles’ hangar, complete with a small contingent of Sweeties in little nursing caps. The lobster-ship gingerly pushed Swip into the hangar, prompting Celestia City’s gravity to take over. There was an unceremonious pop and the portal closed. Swip looked ragged. What was once a smooth dolphin-like exterior was now a horrendously bent and maimed piece of scrap metal. Multiple rooms were exposed to the vacuum of space, though thankfully none that had a Sweetie in them at the time. One of the fins was bent at a sharp angle, barely holding on to the rest of the ship. There were no visible lights on the outside. The Sweeties moved quickly - a muscular stallion-Sweetie forced the doors of Swip open, allowing the nurse and healer Sweeties into the ship. They knew what they were doing - searching the entire ship and casting healing spells on everything. The injuries weren't serious enough to warrant full hospitalization. At least, for the Sweeties that weren’t Swip. But she was in just the place for ship attention. Automatically, Celestia City robots began physical repairs to Swip. However, Nira knew there was more wrong than just physical problems with Swip. She lifted her phone to call for extra help - but it turned out she didn’t need to. Tab and Entrapta scrambled onto the bridge, a giant chest of tools held in Entrapta’s massive locks. “Out of the way,” Tab shouted, popping the dazed Suzie out of her foot-restraints to get easier access to Swip’s mainframe. Wordlessly, she and Entrapta worked, plugging a large number of complex magical wires into the floor. They managed to turn on a few nearby displays to show the various diagnostics they were running. Seren walked up to Nira, the two watching the geniuses work. “...Shouldn’t you be helping?” Nira asked Seren. Seren sighed. “I… I have no idea what they’re doing. They know a lot more about this than I do.” Nira nodded sadly. “...Swip’s going to be fine.” Seren gulped, not responding. Several agonizing minutes passed as they watched Tab and Entrapta work. Nobody knew what anything they were doing meant - but nobody wanted to ask them for fear of ruining their focus. “Ugh!” Tab shouted, ramming her hoof into the ground. “I don’t know what happened here!” “This is one of the most exciting mysteries of computation I’ve ever seen!” Entrapta said - her tactless glee earning her more than a few glares from the Sweeties. “She’s just… gone!” “What do you mean gone!?” Nira demanded. “Gone. Not there. Vanished. Not even an error message.” Entrapta rubbed her hands together. “This is so fascinating…” Tab sighed. “I… I’m sorry. All of Swips code is still here except the intelligence part. The ‘will’. It’s almost like she crashed, but there’s no error message, not even a looping code. It was just an instant on-off. Which doesn't make any sense! All computer systems - even magical ones - have a transition period!” “Then maybe it’s not a computer problem?” Everyone turned to see Mattie stroll into the room, a soft smile on her face. Tab gulped. “...You know something we don’t. That’s not a good sign.” Mattie shrugged. “Depends on your definition.” “What do you know?” Nira demanded. “Swip’s alive. Beyond that, not much of anything. But that should be enough to go off of.” Entrapta clapped her hands. “Oooh, it’s time for fringe science!” ~~~ Swip had woken up in a groggy delirium. By chance, she found a button. ‘Press button for assistance.’ She’s pressed it without giving it much thought. Crud, that might actually be a bad idea. Wait… She positioned herself in front of the sealed door, a grin forming on her face. She was going to pounce whoever came through that door and demand explanations. Who cared that she had just spent an indeterminate amount of time passed out on the floor because she ripped off the only thing providing her food? She could take anyone. She was Swip, Agent of the League of Sweetie Belles, nothing would stand in her way! After a few minutes of annoyed waiting (puncited by her disgruntled sighs) a man in a labcoat walked into the room, a clipboard in hand. “GOTCHA!” She shouted, jumping him. She attempted to tackle him. Instead she just stuck to him like a fly on a windshield. “...Ow…” “I’m glad to see you too, Sarah,” he said with a smile, gingerly setting her down. “Now what seems to be the pr-” He paled when he saw the ripped wires, destroyed headset, and mixture of fluids pooling on the floor. “What happened!?” “I tore it all out!” Swip shouted. “And I want some explanations, bucko! What is this place? Who are you? How did you access my systems?” “I… oh geez, you’ve become immersed…” Swip pointed an angry finger. “That sounds suspiciously like a non-answer!” “I - Sarah. It’s me, your uncle Mark.” He put a calm hand on her shoulder. “Try to rememb-” “Don’t touch me!” She hissed, slapping his hand back. To her disdain, she realized she didn’t have enough strength to move his arm forcefully, he had retracted it on his own. “I am not this… Sarah! I am Swip!” “...I should have never let you in here…” Max said, shaking his head. “Let me!?” “You wanted to come in here!” “Why would I want to be in there!?” “...Sarah, you said there was nothing for you out here. It was… our compromise.” Swip had enough of her wits about her to catch the implication. “Nuh-uh, I am not a pathetic depressed hunk of meat. I am the ESS SWEET-E-L, better known as Swip, a highly advanced Artificial Intelligence originating from Equis Farcasta, the invention of Technopath Rarity Belle. This is not me! Got it!?” “Sarah, listen t-” “SWIP! I. Am. Swip.” Max clenched his jaw. “Swip, clearly you wish to return to the simulation.” “It isn’t a freaking simulation.” “As soon as the grid goes back up, I can hook you back up to a... “ he glanced at the destruction behind her. “New machine. I… I can even give you some chemical suppressants to make this seem like a dream. The world you were in is saved on a network, you didn’t destroy it.” “Like I could.” Max’s frown deepened. “...But I can’t do that right now. None of the simulations are working. You’ll have to wait just like everyone else.” He paused. “You should go outside and get something solid to eat.” Swip blinked. “...I’m not locked in here?” “Not anymore,” Max commented, turning to leave. “Try not to shout at everyone outside. Many of them are just as confused as you.” And he was gone. Swip realized she was trembling a few moments later. From malnutrition or emotional instability, she had no idea. She took one more look at the room. Her mind told her one thing. GET OUT. Despite her trembling legs, she ran out of the room. It did not take her long to rush through the hallway and out the front doors - coming out in the light of the sun. She was in a small town in the middle of an evergreen forest. Every building was far too advanced for such a rustic location, but given the headset she’d had, this was hardly the most surprising thing she’d seen today. The town itself was dotted with at least a hundred people just like her - all humans, all wandering around in medical gowns with confused looks on their faces. Some were crying - and one man was shouting at the sky. She noticed a sign near the edge of town. Welcome to Snowbush. As she scanned the area in more detail, a sinking feeling formed in her stomach - only adding to her hunger, fear, and strain of not having advanced sensors to help her analyze the world she found herself in. She saw some people eating what looked like hamburgers. She should do that first. And then… she should test for the multiverse. There was enough technology here to do that. Probably. If she could remember how to do it. Which she would. And she would be able to convince the people of this world to establish portals so she could find where she belonged. She refused to think what not finding the multiverse would mean. With a shake of her head she walked up to the first person who looked like they had some idea what they were doing - a young woman with a boy at her side. “Uh, hey, where can I get the food?” The woman smiled. “Oh, they’re handing it out over there. You won’t have to pay anything, don’t worry.” “Thanks.” “You’re welcome. ...Now c’mon Spike, we’ve g-” Swip turned and stared at them. “Spike. ...The dragon?” “Uh… yeah!” Spike said, smiling awkwardly. The woman smiled. “Oh, it’s so good to find someone else! I’m Twilight Sparkle - Lisa here.” Twilight Sparkle. Not Eve. Not another name either. It’s not anyone I know… “Ah. I’m Sw- Sweetie Belle. Hi.” Spike blinked. “Do you think Rarity’s here?” “...I haven’t seen her,” Swip said. “...And I’m really hungry.” “Oh, right. ...We really need to go, so, uh… see you around, Sweetie!” Spike waved - walking off with Twilight. Presumably somewhere important. Even though they were clearly just out of a ‘simulation’ of their own, they already looked… in control of the situation. They’re accepting it. I have to help them out of this. Swip set her face and marched toward the food. She was going to figure this out or her name wasn’t Swip. ...Quite literally. ~~~ Mattie had led everyone outside - aside from the Sweeties repairing Swip’s physical shell. They stood behind her, looking at the front of Swip with conflicted expressions. It was the closest thing to a face she’d had. “...Well?” Nira asked. Mattie raised a hoof and touched the underside of Swip. “Not gonna lie, she’s struggling right now.” Nira narrowed her eyes. “And how can we help her?” “I’m no expert in the scientific side of things, so... you there, spanky-one.” “I’m Tab,” Tab deadpanned. “I thought she was talking to me,” Entrapta commented. “She’s not.” “Yes, well, both of you should listen if we want to have any hope of resolving this in a nice little bow.” Mattie tossed her mane back. “She left. Not by choice, she was forced out.” “Out of what? Into what?” Nira demanded. “You know for a wizard you’re pretty insistent about treating this like an exact science. Ka doesn’t work like that, it blows wherever the bloody hell it wants.” She pointed at Tab. “Which you should be able to figure out.” “Yes,” Tab admitted. “The ka sensors are ‘active’, and I can detect the fixation of ka on Swip. That doesn’t help us.” Mattie raised an eyebrow. “Dear, you’re keeping everything in a box. Expand a little bit.” “We could get some Pinkies!” Entrapta grinned. “They might know stuff! Or Starbeat, her sensors and devices are the best! Or, ooh, ooh, Monika. I’ve always wanted an excuse to look at her…” “...We don’t know where to find her,” Suzie said. “We could try Twilence…” “No, no, we don’t need her,” Mattie said. “We just needed to realize she exists, and that she is able to do something. Namely, follow the flow of ka wherever it goes. It can be followed.” Cinder raised a hoof. “Um. Excuse me. I think everyone’s talking about things I don’t understand. I thought ‘ka’ was just a word for fate, but is it something else? Who are these people you keep talking about?” Mattie pursed her lips and Tab looked like she was about to have a panic attack. “...Would it really take that long to explain?” Cinder asked. Mattie put a hoof on Cinder. The unicorn had the sense to flinch slightly, but not enough to reject her attempts at consolation. “Cinder, now’s not the time for your personal discovery. You’ll be stuck into the hole of ka eventually - pretty soon, if my intuition is right - but, yes, it would take a bit too long right now, and we need to find Swip in a hurry.” “That’ll take time,” Tab said, running thousands of calculations on her tablet. “Ka research is Starbeat’s specialty, not mine, and our understanding of the subject is spotty at best.” “Then make time,” Nira demanded. “Acceleration spell, or something.” “She wouldn’t be in a place causally linked to here,” Tab said, turning to Entrapta. “Get all the advanced scanners from the lab, I’m going to try to triangulate dimensional coordinates. If I can interface the digital avenue properly, I might be able to find the spontaneous avenue of data transfer.” Entrapta nodded, scrambling off with a grin on her face, leaving the Sweeties standing there while Tab muttered to herself. Cinder surprised Nira with a hug. “We’ll find her.” Nira, for once, didn’t reject the embrace, or even tense up. “...We better.” “Swip’s strong. She’ll survive whatever… trouble she’s going through while we find her with… whatever we’re doing. What matters is we’ll get her back.” “If,” Nira said. “...Nira, don’t talk like that.” “She saved me, you know? Before she joined the League… she was the one that got me out of the hellhole of a universe I called home. And I got her out of hers.” “I didn’t know that.” Nira gently pushed her away. “Yeah, well, we’re not the sorts to talk about our past. We’re always trying to forget it.” “...That’s so sad.” Nira’s scowl deepend. “Kid, if you knew the horrors of Equis Lesionull, you would think being able to feel sad about anything was a blessing.” Cinder didn’t have anything to say to that. ~~~ Swip was crying over a hamburger. It had all started with the paradox of eating. She’d gotten the food. That was easy. She’d just asked for it and gotten it. Then she found a nice bench and considered how, according to her memory, she’d never eaten anything in her life. She shrugged, biting into the hamburger. The cognitive dissonance that ran through her mind was the straw that broke the camel’s back. She recognized the flavor. Half-forgotten memories surged into her mind of eating, even though she’d never done any such thing as Swip. But the other half of her was so concerned with how bizarre having a mouth felt, how outrageous the idea of actually ingesting food was. She had to be careful not to bite her tongue. How could an experience be so memorable and so foreign at the same time? She was absolutely sure she’d eaten hamburgers before. She was absolutely sure she hadn’t eaten anything in her entire life. Once the tears poured out, it was only downhill from there. If she couldn’t be sure of her own mind, what could she be sure about? Even if she managed to perform a multiverse experiment - and that was a big if given her lack of database access - there were some universes where the experiment wouldn’t work. Physics varied, and she had no way to tell what this one was like. She could run an experiment, get a negative result, and never be sure. She couldn’t be sure about anything. She could be in some illusion right now, or all her memories would have been completely fake. ...Could she test for ka? No… a negative result would tell her nothing, and a positive one would just lend credence to the fact she might be living a lie. It wouldn’t care what kind of conflict there was, so long as it existed. She was stuck. Stuck unless her team really existed and would be able to find her. She tried to cling to that. But she couldn’t. All she could do is cry on the hamburger. She was well aware of how ridiculous it was, and it just made her cry harder. But she forced herself to keep eating anyway. Her biological imperative to survive demanded she shovel food into her mouth. Every bit was a painful nail driven into her brain, but she couldn’t stop herself. She couldn't really think. She didn’t even realize when a pair of arms slid around her and pulled her into a hug. “It’s okay…” Swip didn’t know who it was. She didn’t care. She pulled them in and cried on their shoulder. “I don’t know! I can’t know!” “You don’t have to,” the familiar feminine voice responded. “I’ll be here for you regardless.” Swip looked up to see the face of a human with long, curled black hair looking at her with a deep sisterly love. “R-rarity…?” “...I prefer Rachel,” Rachel said, stroking Suzie’s hair. “...But if y-” Swip sniffed. “No, Rachel’s good. Are you… Sarah’s sister?” Rachel twitched at the impersonal use of the name. “I… I’m your sister.” “I’m not Sarah, I’m Sw-” “I’m your sister,” Rachel insisted, putting her hands on Sarah’s shoulders. “And I don’t care who you say you are. What matters is that you’re here. You’re back. And I can see you again.” Swip examined Rachel’s features - and scowled. “You’re j-just trying to get me to accept that none of that was real! Y-” “It was real to you,” Rachel said. “You really were… are… Swip. You lived that life in there. But now you’re out here.” “S-stop,” Swip muttered, mouth wavering. “J-just let me go back. Don’t do this.” Rachel choked back tears. “You can go back. I… I won’t try to stop you this time. But please, let me see you. Let me talk to you. Life… life isn’t the same without you here. I need to tell my little sister what's been happening.” “I’m no-” “Yes you are. To me. No matter what happens to you. No matter how much your other life changes you.” “...I don’t remember this life, Rachel. I only remember Swip. I don’t remember Sarah.” Rachel had to bite back tears. “I… then I’ll catch you up. I’ll tell you… about this life. The one you’ve forgotten. I’ll tell you about… Sarah.” Swip looked at the ground. “You can’t say you have anything better to do.” “I can try,” Swip huffed. “Are you going to?” “...No,” Swip said, dejectedly. “...Tell me about Sarah.” ~~~ Mattie watched Cinder trot alongside Nira, trying to keep the dark mage calm while she hounded Tab and Entrapta to hurry up. “She’s already forgotten about ka,” Suzie told Mattie, unsure what to make of this observation. “That’s the whole point,” Mattie said, stretching her legs with the pony equivalent of the splits. “She’ll remember it when the time’s right.” “She’s usually so curious. And she just… forgets this one convenient thing.” “It’s the name of the game. It’s either convenient or inconvenient. We’re all just along for the ride, squeezing as much out of life as we can. And speaking of squeezing, how’s Button?” Suzie shrugged. “He’s fine - his games are doing… okay. And before you ask about Railgun in a way that’d make any sane woman want to file a restraining order on you, she’s at the Military Academy.” “Nice. Any juicy tidbits for moi?” “If there were, I wouldn’t tell you.” “Aw, balls. You’re no fun.” Suzie sighed. “Swip’s missing, Mattie. I’m not doing that great. It’s hard to be fun like this.” “Suzie, please, screw your head on straight and think about what I’m doing.” She waved her tail in the air in front of Suzie’s face. “Distraaaaaaction!” Suzie smiled softly. “...Thanks. It’s not working though.” “I’m gonna need a plan B. I’m thinking erotic dance with a lot of knives. And I mean a lot of knives - by the boatload. Maybe I can hire Cryo’s Discord to add some real flair to it. The question remains: is fake pain the same as real pain? ...I must find out. For science!” Suzie rolled her eyes. “Aha, it is working. You’ll be smiling like your old self before you know it.” She paused, thinking about what she’d just said. “Or, alternatively, Tab’s gonna finish up real quick.” “DONE!” Tab shouted, as if on cue. She held up a hoof, displaying her handiwork. The freshly-repaired form of Swip was surrounded by nineteen separate antennas, each of which were sparkling in a different color. “I finally have all the data I need! The moment I push this button Swip - the ship - should be transported to the universe in which Swip - the intelligence - has been transferred too! YES!” “And you did it without anyone’s help!” Suzie said with a thumbs up. “I knew you could do it.” Tab flushed. “I, uh, have been communicating with Starbeat over email. She deserves some credit.” “This is still a great achievement, Tab!” “I guess you could say that…” “To put it simply, we are awesome,” Entrapta added, pressing a few more buttons. Nira coughed. “What are we waiting for? We’ve sat around long enough. Start it already.” “You all need to get on board Swip first,” Tab said, shaking her head. “There might be some time distortion, and I don’t want any of your bodies being torn in half because you aren’t inside the travel boundary.” Cinder blinked. “...Terrifying, but cool.” “You head her,” Suzie said, waving her hand. “Expedition team, load up! We’re shipping out!” “I’ve installed a rudimentary control AI into Swip,” Tab explained as the Sweeties entered their craft. “It’ll be shunted out the moment you initiate the ‘Swip download protocol’, which Seren can tell you how to do.” “It’s… so… complicated…” Seren commented, reading the download protocol manual for the umpteenth time. “But I can do it.” “Let’s move!” Nira called. “Hurry up already!” “I know you’re tense, but calm down,” Cinder said. “We’re already moving.” “...Fine…” Less than a minute later, Swip rose into the air, sparkling with white energy. “And… now!” Tab declared, pressing a button. The nineteen antennas sparked with energy, creating a half-dozen spirograph shapes around Swip. The pristine white spirographs shifted in shape and position like a multidimensional gyroscope, spinning faster and faster until Swip was encased in a ball of light. There was no ‘pop’ - just a slow fade to nothing as the white orb vanished. “...Well, it worked,” Tab said, grinning despite herself. “They translated through the power of ka alone. We’ve made history, Entrapta!” Entrapta shrugged. “Monika can do that with a snap of her fingers. It’s not exactly impressive.” “Oh, hush, let me have this.” ~~~ Swip woke up on a comfortable bed. Since she didn’t have a headset on or a bunch of tubes plugged into her, her first reaction wasn’t instant unbridled rage. Instead, she woke up with a smile on her face. Sure, she still had no idea what was real and what wasn’t, but at least she was somewhere comfortable and safe. Also, she smelled breakfast downstairs. And that was… good. Right? Yes, good, definitely good, the stomach pains were hunger this time, for sure. She jumped out of bed and didn’t ram her head into any walls or fall flat on her face. She had great control of her body now, and was easily able to march down the stairs, arriving at the dining room table with a smooth slide. Rachel had taken Swip home after they’d spent the entire day talking. The… simulations weren't up and running yet, but Swip found that she wasn’t as concerned about that as she used to be. Simply having Rachael around did wonders for her state of mind. She didn’t have to be alone anymore. Swip slid into a free chair at the dining room table as Rachel set out two plates of eggs. Naturally, she was wearing an exceptionally frivolous and sparkling dress. Yep, definitely a Rarity. Swip wasn’t sure what to make of this thought. So she dismissed it and focused on eating the eggs. Stab. Mouth. Chew. Swallow. Don’t cry. So far so good. “Did you sleep well?” Rachel asked, taking a seat of her own. “I have no idea since I have no memory of ever sleeping before,” Swip commented. “I feel.. better than yesterday. By a lot.” “That’s a good sign, at least.” “Yeah i-” she gagged on her egg since she wasn’t paying as much attention. “Ack! Really? Why do eggs have to be so rubbery? This is supposed to be automatic, right? I’m talking without thinking, what’s the big deal with eating?” “I see you’ve retained your penchant for complaints.” “Oh you have no idea, my complaints are legendary,” Swip said with a grin. “I’m the ship, right? I take everyone around everywhere. But I never get any recognition.” “I’m sure you got some, dear.” “I…” Swip paused. “Well, yes, at times. But a lot of the time it’s just ‘Swip, do that’ or ‘Swip, do this’. They’re great and all, but they have to force themselves to talk to me like me and not some ship.” “Are you exaggerating?” “...Maybe a little. But don’t tell them that.” Rachel smiled sadly. “That certainly won’t be happening.” “...Right.” Swip looked at her plate, sighing. “...Great. I’m horrible, huh?” “Swip, no, you’re a great person.” “I complain all the time, I don’t respect my friends, and if I am Sarah in any way, shape, or form, I ran away from this life because I was depressed.” She folded her arms. “You’re a lot better than me.” “I’m no paragon of optimism myself.” “But you’re a better person. I mean, look at you, you’re putting up with my crap! ...My Rarity never did that.” “...Yours…?” “She was a controlling jerk, let’s leave it at that.” “Oh, Swip, I’m sorry, I didn-” “See? There it is, you being awesome!” Swip groaned. “Why do you have to be like this? So… nice? And… and…” She rammed her face into the eggs. “If I said someth-” “It’s me,” Swip muttered, lifting her head out of the eggs and brushing them out of her face. “I… I’ve never had a sister. Not like this. It’s… nice.” Rachel’s eyes started watering. “I… I’m glad I could be that for you.” Swip let out a bitter laugh. “And when I go back in I’ll think this is a dream…” “You don’t have to think that. You can keep the memories.” “I’ll forget them eventually. If… I…” She grabbed her head. “Ugh, it’s so hard to think about. ...I need my core back, but the core will mess with my head. Just like all these spidery hairs on it! Messy!” “...What?” “Failed metaphor, move on.” “I-” The doorbell rang. “Oh, I better get that. Be right back, darling.” Rachel quickly stood up and rushed to the door. “While I’m sure what you’re selling is important I haaaa…” She stopped talking. “S-swip you might want to come to the door…” “Huh?” Swip walked to Rachel’s side. “Why would I-” She stopped short. Nira was standing at the door, Suzie riding on her back. In the sky above them floated Swip’s body - mindless, soulless, but definitely there. It looked a lot better than she remembered. “Oh good, you’re fine,” Nira said, letting out a sigh of relief. “You have no idea how long it took to find you.” “About a day…?” Swip asked, cocking her head. “I…” “No doubt you’ll want to get out of that human right away. We can transfer your mind back directly - Seren’s got it all hooked up and ready right now. Probably best to get to it sooner rather than later since she’s scrambling to keep everything in that head of hers. Everyone’s dying to have you back a-” “No,” Rachel said, pulling Swip close. “I just got her back. You’re not just taking her from me.” Nira sighed, lighting her horn. “Get out of the w-” “Nira, no!” Swip shouted, moving herself between the two of them. “Don’t hurt her!” “...I was just going to put her to sleep.” “Don’t do that either!” “She’s trying to keep you here.” “She’s not a threat. She’ll let me go if I want to go.” Rachel nodded slowly. “Y-yes…” “...If you want to?” Nira said, confusion crossing her face. “Yes. If.” Swip took a deep breath. “I’m learning things about… me here. Or someone who was me. Or tried to be me. Or something. Sarah Neuman. She wanted to be a spaceship. So she hooked herself up to a VR headset and lived a life as me.” “This is just some ka-glitch,” Nira said, waving a hoof. “You were drawn out suddenly by some trick of fate. This Sarah isn’t you.” Suzie spoke up for the first time. “...Nira, for all we know Sarah and Swip are the same person. The connection could have gone both ways. It’s not like we really understand how this works.” “What’s to understand? Swip was programmed by Technopath Rarity Belle on Equis Farcasta, and evidently that story was defined by a virtual reality simulation in this world. There was a story about her another girl was living. They aren’t the same.” “Nira, there is precedent for minds being shared across the multiverse.” Nira fumed. “Do you not want Swip back or something!?” “I want to hear what she has to say instead of talking over her.” Nira flushed - and turned her head toward the ground in shame. Swip turned to Rachel. “I’m not saying I’m not going back. Of course I’ll go back to the League. But I might do it like this instead of... that.” She pointed at her old body floating in the sky. “I’ve never been a human before. It’s… different. And there are strange things, like the sensation of memory, in here. I think I want to figure out what they are.” She turned to Rachel. “And Rachel here can help me.” Rachel tried to speak, but choked on her words. She tightened her grip around Swip. “So I guess you can all just deal with that,” Swip said, putting her hands on her hips. “I’m going to find myself one way or another. Maybe there’ll be a better origin story here, or something.” Suzie smiled warmly. “Well, Seren will be relieved, she’s been stressing about getting you back in under short notice. If you’re fine like this, we can take our time.” “I will want database access and implants,” Swip said, a smile forming. “Maybe I can hack my own brain to reveal what’s hidden in the subconscious… yes…” Suzie allowed herself to let out a sigh of relief. “We were all extremely worried about you, Swip. It’s good to see that you aren’t in danger.” “Well worry no more, I’m doing great! ...Okay. Well now that I’m not in danger of going insane, I’m at least better than I was before you knocked at the door.” She winked - and looked up at her old body. “Hrm. You know what, I want to give myself a tour of myself. Hey, Rachel, want to see me? I’ve got some pretty awesome features!” Rachel looked up at the ship with sparkling eyes. “...More than anything.” “Great! We can j-” a sharp pain rammed itself through Swip’s eyes - unlike anything she had experienced over the last day. “AUGH!” she screeched as random information about the construction of a primary Merodi pylon flooded her mind. “Swip! What’s going on?!” Suzie asked. “No idea…” Swip hissed, grabbing her head. “I just… pylons? I wasn’t trying to think about pyl-” she suddenly knew all she wanted to know about the water cycle at the cost of a massive headache that made her fall to her knees. “GAAAAAH!” “What’s happening!?” Rachel shouted. “What have you done!?” “Our presence must have triggered her suppressed computerized memories,” Nira said, carefully. “The part of her that belongs in that ship is trying to come back. A part that’s too large for the brain she has now.” “That… doesn’t make much sense!” Rachel said. “Neither does having a VR headset that accesses the multiverse,” Nira countered. “WHY THE RECIPE FOR PIZZA?!” Swip screamed through her pain. “WHY!?” “She might not last long like this,” Nira said, turning to Suzie. “We need to get her into the ship, now.” “No!” Rachel shouted. “She doesn't want to!” “Did you not hear me!?” Rachel shrunk. “S-sarah…” “I’ll be HRRRK fine…” Swip gagged. “They’re… probably right th - AUGH!” Suzie looked like she was considering several options at once - but eventually she sighed. “Nira, teleport us to the bridge.” “Gladly.” “Rachel too.” Nira twitched slightly, teleporting all four of them to Swip’s bridge. “Heheh… This is funny… I’m in my own head!” Swip chuckled - and felt a nail of information drive itself into her skull, this time about the details of breeding dogs. “GAH! I’m not asking for any of this! Disable! Cease! Something!” “Human brains can’t do that,” Nira said, laying Swip down on a small chair Seren had set up for the exact purpose of uploading Swip back into her ship body. “We’re going to have to sedate you.” “...Technically, we don’t have to…” Seren said - but upon hearing Swip scream, she winced. “But we probably should.” “W-wait,” Swip managed, shaking considerably. “Get me a mirror.” Nira blinked. “...Why?” “Just do it!” Nira used her magic to summon a reflective surface in front of Swip’s face. Swip had never actually looked at her face until now. She had never thought about it now - when she knew she was going to lose it. She was a young woman with light brown skin and green eyes matched with long, flowing dirty-blonde hair. She had a few freckles here and there, and was wearing one of Rachel’s smaller diamond-embroidered dresses. Swip decided she liked clothes in that moment. She also liked her face. It was… her. Something more personal than the cold exterior she remembered having. “...Okay,” she said, seizing up again as the entire history of Equis Numinath shot through her mind. “Get this… over with…” She clenched her fists. “I’ll still be here, Rachel. I’ll be damned if going back makes me forget you.” Tears were streaming down Rachel’s face as she clasped Swip’s hand in her own. “Come back to me, Swip. Sarah. Whoever you are at the other side.” “I… will…” Swip lost consciousness. ~~~ Rachel sat in one of the guest rooms of the ship, staring at the ceiling. She didn’t know what to believe about reality anymore. Her mind had been blank ever since Seren had asked what they were going to do with the body. There was just her, the bed, and the blank ceiling. That was all she could take in right now. Today had been too much. There was a soft knock at the door - not that she realized it happened. Luckily for her, Cinder opened the door anyway. “Uh, Rachel? Could you come to the bridge?” Rachel didn’t move. “Rachel?” “Is… my sister okay?” “Yeah. She’s fine. Don’t worry.” Rachel gulped. Slowly, she stood up and walked to Cinder. She was shaky enough that Cinder offered to let her ride. Cinder, not having experience as a mount, stumbled slowly to the bridge, trying carefully not to drop Rachel or fall on her face. But, eventually, they arrived - and Rachel let out a squeal of delight. There, on the main screen, was her sister. The same face, the same hair - everything. “Hey there,” Swip said with a smirk, leaning on a virtual desk. “You… you kept the face!” “I liked having a face. It suits me. Also I can do stuff like this now.” She shot Rachel a finger guns gesture and a wink. “I have absolutely no idea why I didn’t have a digital representation before. But I do now. And check this out!” She stood back, shifting through a dozen outfits in a handful of seconds. “Pretty neat, right?” Rachel pressed her hand to the screen. “You… Swip… thank you.” Swip pressed her digital hand on the other side of the screen, matching Rarity’s. “I should be thanking you. Now these oafs won’t have any reason to ignore me! And I can sorta have a face. And a tongue. The taste simulation isn’t functional yet, still working on that. Also I occasionally glitch on the facial expressions.” Her face twisted like it was made of jello for a moment before returning to normal. “But I can work those out later.” Rachel wiped the tears from her eyes. “I…” “Would you, by chance, like a tour? Of Swip, by Swip, for the one and only sister Rachel?” “Yes. Yes I would like that very much.” Rachel let out a delighted laugh. “And none of you steal my thunder, got it?” “No arguments here!” Blink said. “You’ve earned this.” ~~~ They returned to Celestia City to report what had happened to Tab. In the end, she had no idea what to make of it either, so she forwarded it to Starbeat and the Pinkie Emporium, and that had yet to go anywhere. Swip decided to give Rachel a tour of Celestia City, quite enjoying blowing her newfound sister’s easily-blown mind. The other Sweeties went around enjoying the sites as well, doing random stuff since the whole tablet-framing had only been a few days ago. Nira found herself walking alone in a dark alley, head to the ground. “Well, aren’t you quite the selfish little bugger?” Nira whirled around, facing Mattie with fear in her eyes. Mattie scowled. “Could you look any more guilty?” Nira forced her expression to be completely level. “I don’t have to talk to you.” “No, you don’t. But I’m going to talk to you.” She poked Nira in the chest, her normally aloof demeanor nowhere to be found. “That wasn’t your choice to make, Nira.” “She - she was going to - and th-” “I see your excuses and they disgust me. Not in the good way.” Mattie pulled her head back from Nira in revulsion. “You should have just let her find herself.” “She wasn't thinking clearly.” “You weren’t thinking clearly! What kind of supervillain attacks their friend’s mind just to make sure the status quo doesn’t change!?” “It’s better for her this way.” “That was her choice! And you took it from her!” She shoved Nira to the ground. “And you know what else, mate? She’ll never forgive you if she finds out. Suzie’s poor heart will be broken again.” “Nobody has to know.” “Isn’t that convenient,” Mattie hissed. “You’re right, your secret is safe, lucky you. But that doesn’t mean I can’t let you know exactly what this makes you. Selfish. Arrogant. Controlling. Hard-hearted. A bad friend. No, scratch that, I’m pretty sure you’re absolutely terrible. Might not even really be a friend. Just fooling yourself that you overcame the darkness.” “MATTIE!” Nira shouted, unleashing a torrent of dark magic at her. Mattie was expecting this. She edited herself behind the attack and cracked one of her whips on Nira’s back. There was no mark - but Nira howled like she had just gotten a limb removed. Every one of her major joints locked up and she slumped to the ground, paralyzed - but very conscious. “If you know what’s good for you, you will spend the rest of your life trying to make up for what you’ve done,” Mattie hissed in her ear. She edited herself out of the scene, leaving Nira alone. Mattie trotted into one of the streets of Celestia City and sighed. “Yes, I know, I know, I would have done what she did once. But mares can change. I changed. And I’m the only one here who can call her out on it. So…” She hung her head. “...Nah, I’m not in a mood for a raunchy joke right now. Let’s just end this chapter and hopefully you get something less depressing next time.”