I woke up when the sun tickled my eyelids. All of this was only a dream, I tell myself, I'm warm at home and... Wait, no, it's not hot at home and neither the blankets nor bed are so soft that they could be mistaken for a cloud.
I opened my eyes and immediately noticed a green muzzle in my field of vision. Lord, tell me I'm still dreaming, I pleaded. As usual no one answered me.
The room looked like a hotel, as it had night themed colors everywhere. If it was not a dream then I should be in my barrel unless... I swallowed slowly. The princess found me.
I got up from the bed and headed downstairs; falling a dozen times on the floor on my way to the window overlooking the same horse version of the Statue of Liberty. I thought of fleeing through the window, but the height dissuaded me.
Overcome, I went to the only door in my room, the one that led directly to the dining table where I first saw the princesses.
A hearty breakfast was waiting for me on the table where it was obvious that no one was waiting for me. Feeling my belly rumble like thunder, I headed for the table, falling down again.
It will probably be necessary to get used to that a bit. I climbed up to my chair, which seemed more difficult to climb without help.
Finally, I arrived in my seat and was about to devour everything on the table without knowing if I was supposed to or not when I saw a note. I picked it up awkwardly and read it.
Dear Anon, I let you rest at your leisure and enjoy this nice breakfast because I have to, but I would greatly like to discuss with you later today about your fugue and attitude towards Meteor Breath.
PS: I advise you be wise while waiting for my return; you can play with the toys I put in your trunk but do not leave the suite!
Cool, I'm going to make the princess explode me when she gets back from I have no idea where.
"At least Lord Hatred is not here," I say, eating.
Suddenly, purple smoke appeared in the room and—oh no—this psychotic being was in front of me.
"Hello Anon, nice day is it not?" he greeted.
"You're not going to break everything?" I asked him cautiously.
"Tempting—but no. I'm actually here to announce your new challenge!"
"Pity, what is it?"
"To wear a new turquoise dress!" he said, the mentioned dress in his right hand.
"What? Never in my life would I wear a dress, it's a girl thing!" I complained.
"I knew you would act like all of those idiots so proud of their virility as if it were a medal on their necks."
"I'm not an idiot, I'm a man, and not a girl; so I refuse to wear your dress!"
"Am I forgetting to mention this adorable pink bow for your mane that will delight you?" he taunted.
"Shut up, I'm sick of your kind of— (for vulgar language reasons, this excerpt from the dialogue has been deleted; thank you for your understanding) ...)"
"Whoa, I did not expect so much vulgarity mixed with hatred in you," said Lord Hatred.
"Go outside!"
"I think not, Barely Sugar." The dress and bow disappeared and then reappeared promptly on me. "Now let's play a game!" he said, one of his eyes turning red as copyrighted music played.
I suddenly found myself on an equine version of a Parisian street where I was sitting on a bench facing a beautiful sunset.
Lord Hatred, dressed as a striped referee, appeared before me.
He began a long monologue. "Here's the game: as you can see, you're a teenage version of yourself sitting on a bench in a mood that could not be more romantic. The goal of the game is to resist a flirt. Okay?" he said.
"No."
"Perfect, let's start."
He disappeared as suddenly as he came, and I noticed my teenage horse body panic as a ton of incessant feelings flooded my head.
A super cute stallion approached me and asked if I was not the star he had seen fall. For some reason, I blushed at the compliment and felt embarrassed about his build. He looked so strong and sexy that I blushed even more.
I had to resist for my dignity, but heaven, this stallion was splendid. He was funny, charming, and witty. Pictures of us with two lovely foals appeared in my mind.
I concentrated and ignored him while failing to cut visual contact. He smiled and grabbed a rose with his magic to give to me. I was sweating big drops—how to resist him—so charming, so sexy...
I stepped on him and kissed passionately while Lord Hatred came out of the bushes with an air more than delighted. He took a picture with an old camera that appeared suddenly.
Abruptly, the whole dimension collapsed and I was propelled by the vortex onto the carpet of the living room. I got up, and thank the gods—I was no longer a teenager. All of that was so intense and yet I could only repress a shudder as I thought back.
Whatever Lord Hatred had done to my brain had made me completely mad about a stallion. Besides, he was not that cute. What am I saying, I am neither a girl nor a horse so I must calm down.
After several minutes of calming down, I finally noticed from the corner of my eye that Lord Hatred was there, staring at me while drinking a cup of coffee.
"How? Why did you do that to me? You cheated, I was under the influence of whatever that was!" I accused.
"How good is so much hatred after all those amorous feelings?" he asked me.
"Answer me, you— (for vulgar language reasons, this excerpt from the dialogue was deleted; thank you for your understanding). "
"You are a true sailor at heart when you get angry. I harvest more hate; that's all. These effects that you speak to me about are puberty; in a few years you will be like that every day; during that period I feel that we will have fun," Lord Hatred explained.
"Daily? I do not want to spend my life here as a mare looking for a companion, so listen carefully: you'll take me home, okay?"
"In two days, my little one, okay?"
"Why two days?"
"It's a surprise; now excuse me, I have plans for my professional life."
Luna suddenly stepped out of my doorway as Lord Hatred disappeared a split second prior. I found myself sitting on the floor like an idiot while talking to an empty chair.
The princess grabbed me with her blue magic and put me on Lord Hatred's former seat before standing in front of me.
"I think we're going to need a serious discussion about you!" she said.
"Is this about yesterday?"
"Yes, and also what you were doing two minutes ago."
"I can explain everything, I was talking to Lord Hatred when—"
Luna cut me off. "You were talking to your imaginary friend?"
"He's not an imaginary friend!" I protested.
"You're the only one who can see him and he seems to be the scapegoat of your nonsense."
"What?"
"Stop denying it and listen to me carefully. We will leave for Canterlot where you will go to the orphanage and wait for your parents," she said.
"But I do not have any parents here. They are on Earth!" My explanation was futile.
"I promise you that everything will be fine, we will meet your parent ponies from Earth and you will live happily together."
"Stop it, I'm not a stupid child. You will not find my parents here because I do not come from your ridiculous world of crazy horses!"
"How? You call me a horse and crazy while I dream. I think I won't punish you while I wait for you to get lessons in politeness."
"You can't order me around, you are not my mother."
"I'm not your mother, but I am a princess so I urge you to change your tone with me, Anon."
"Otherwise what?"
"Go to your room!"
"Nope!"
A magic blue glow grabbed me and propelled me to the empty wall of my room, where my efforts to move that proved to be a waste.
A magic blue glow grabbed me and I was propelled to the empty wall of my room, where my efforts to move proved to be a waste.
"I'll leave you here so that you can calm down, if you are interested in doing so, little missy," said Princess Luna.
"Let me go."
I heard the door close behind me with a loud snap. I might not be mad at the princess, but Lord Hatred really pissed me off just now.
But it's not my fault; eeryone treats me like a poor thing while I'm a guy, a tough guy, who can break a wall with his determination. A jerk in fuchsia red armor will not make me miserable.
- 3 hours later -
I'm fed up, getting restless and hungry. My little filly belly has been gurgling for an hour now.
The doors opened behind me and I noticed from the corner of my eye that the princess was looking at me with lines of discontent on her face.
"Are you calm or would you prefer to stay here?"
"I'm calm."
"Well, I would like you to ask before taking Mademoiselle's dresses, Anon," said Luna.
"It's Lord... I'm sorry." I refrained from mentioning Lord Hatred in front of her.
"You can keep it if you want, but come on. The guards have finished storing the luggage."
"We're leaving?"
"Yes, try to follow a conversation from time to time."
"To Canterlot?"
"Exactly"
"And I'll go to the orphanage?"
"Yes, time to find your parents."
"But what if we do not find them?"
"Then a loving family will adopt you."
"But I do not want one."
"Do not do it again, Anon, it's for your own good."
She held me with her hoof while we headed for the exit. I hated this dress. She squeezed my waist and added a skirt.
I am not a girl. Why did this thing turn me into one? Besides, why did he even take me here? Is he sadistic? If he wanted to humiliate me and make me suffer, then he was very successful. I boarded the princess's carriage without realizing I did so as my internal ruminations overwhelmed me. Why did I have to burn out that day?
I was cursed, stuck in the body of a little filly in a world of horses which seemed to annoy Luna for some reason.
I looked at the landscape around me with a sad expression, hardly thinking about it. My ears were sagging and the princes was constantly checking on me.
We arrived, silent as death, in front of a train station filled with a crowd of well-dressed multicolored horses. I felt a new opportunity to flee. Or...? Only far from this angry princess and her orphanage.
I do not want to be a child again and go back through school. When Luna and I got down, she dropped me for a short period of time. I started to run immediately, only to fly into the air instead.
Fly in the air? I was floating in a blue aura just like the one Princess Luna had around her horn at that very moment. She had used telekinesis to get me moving.
She took me silently into the train wagon. There she took a hold of me and looked at me almost maliciously.
"This is the last time Anon! Next time, I'll put you in a leash so that you won't escape!" Luna roared.
"Sorry."
"Do not be sorry if you do not mean it. I know that the orphanage scares you, but you will always see Meteor Breath."
"I do not want to go."
"I will not go into this discussion with a stubborn filly!"
"I'm not a stubborn filly!"
Dinnertime came, and the great princess diplomat that she was in front of my continual refusal got upset and stuffed a salad in my mouth before proceeding to force me to eat with her damn magic that I didn't have. I bit her while struggling fiercely.
She screamed and called me savage, ironic coming from someone who savagely pounds me with salad while using her magic to force me to chew food.
She punished me in a way that I would prefer to forget as it was very humiliating. Yes, this bitch, sorry for the big words, gave me about thirty spankings that my back still remembers. Fortunately, she at least had the decency to remove her silver irons before doing so. I cried angrily for another twenty minutes after my painful punishment. I will take my revenge one day, but it is better to avoid doing so in the immediate future.
The end of the day was spent in complete silence. The trip lasted a full day and we spent the evening, night and all morning in this train where the dishes were all infected without exceptions.
At noon we finally arrived at our destination. The princess came out of the train with me; looking at me constantly while I looked as farm away from her as I could.
This city seemed different from everything I had seen in my world. Gilded roofs with strange shapes crowned the white houses.
"Anon, excuse me for disturbing you, but I have to go. My guards will escort you to the orphanage. I really hope you find your parents," said Luna.
"What? No, please. Anything but an orphanage," I say, clinging to her leg.
"Anon, I know it's hard, but it's temporary. Meteor Breath will come to see you, she is worried about you since you ran away."
"I do not want a psychologist; I do not want to go."
"Guards, can you help me detach her from my hoof please?"
The guards removed me as gently as possible from the princess's hoof before flanking me from the left and right as we headed to the streets of Canterlot. I would go to see the orphanage, then I would flee.