//------------------------------//
// Chapter 8: Hubris 
// Story: The Half of It 
// by Shapeshift 
//------------------------------//

After six more weeks of working on the metamorphic shape-shifting spell, I heard some news that I’d never expect in my lifetime.

Twilight Sparkle is now a princess and her coronation is planned for only a few days later!

I knew at that moment that the spell needed to be complete by then. I was not going to miss something as amazing as that! So I spent the next few days working harder than I ever did on the spell, but there were still a few problems that I had yet to solve. That’s when someone unexpected made their appearance, though unexpected was the name of his game.

I was trying to fix the last problems in the spell during the last several hours before her coronation, when something behind me made a sudden bright flash. I immediately turned to see Discord of all creatures standing next to a chimney that I knew didn’t exist a few seconds ago. He was wearing a black coat with an orange knitted scarf, white gloves, a hat with a few daises on it, and carrying an open black umbrella.

“Oh, hello Shape! I’ve been watching you for a while now and noticed that you could use some help!" was the first thing he said.

I responded with a slightly confused and suspicious expression. “Why are you suddenly interested in me? I don’t do the kind of chaos that you find entertaining.”

“On the contrary, my friend, you know what they say about life," he said as he took both his eyes out then opened his hands to reveal lemons. He then put his hand in an empty eye socket and pulled out a glass, then squeezed the lemons. Seeing as this was Discord, I wasn’t surprised that the lemon’s juice was colored purple.

“You look thirsty," he said as he offered me the cup of juice. “Grape juice?”

In a deadpan tone I said, “No thanks.”

Discord shrugged. “Very well. But let’s get to business. I know you’ve been practicing changeling infiltration and working on that metamorphic spell of yours.” In a flash of light he got rid of the getup, swapped to Twilight’s colors and gave himself her mane style. “You do want to see Twilight’s coronation, correct?” And apparently her voice as well.

My expression told him ‘yes’, so he continued with, “I could give you what you need to fix all it’s remaining problems. All you’d owe me is one favor.”

So seeing as he wasn’t to be trusted with explaining everything up front, I asked, “What kind of favor?”

Discord hummed in thought for several seconds, and I went back to working. Though he soon snapped his fingers and changed to his normal self, which got my attention.  He shrugged, and said, “I can’t think of anything yet.”

So I told him, “It can’t involve wounding, killing, emotional scaring, or betraying anybody or thing I care about.”

He then decided to change into a samurai griffin wielding a sword with a black and gold hilt design. Though he looked at the sword for a second and casually threw it behind him, cutting a set of armor that wasn’t there before right in half, long ways, as if it was just a cheep nightmare night costume.

Right after he threw the sword he made a sad dramatic pose and told me, “I’m a offended that you’d think I’d ask for such a thing! I thought that my reform meant something!”

I didn’t completely trust him with this deal, but I still sternly said, “I accept the deal as long as what I said is off limits.”

Discord stopped his dramatic posing to say, “Straight to the point, eh? A deal it is then!" and materialized a large pile of parchment filled with notes onto my desk with a smile. “It wasn’t easy finding all of this, so put it to good use!”

Before I could say anything else, he flashed out of my house. So I decided to take a quick look through everything he gave me to make sure that it all at least seemed to make sense, and once I was done I started using it. With them, it didn’t take too long before I was done. The notes even drastically helped with the spell’s moderate energy efficiency problem!

After that, I had a few hours before the coronation, but I left two hours before it started so I could get a good seat. 

What? Seeing a princess coronation is a once in several lifetimes opportunity! I wasn’t going to waste it by sitting in one of the farther, more obscuring spots!

Anyways, once I took the time to change disguises in one of the crystal mine’s entrances and activated my detection spell, I traveled to the castle. Upon arriving at the entrance, the unicorn Guard had to cast the disguise dispel on me before letting me enter. As usual, the dispel did nothing and she let me pass so I could find a prime spot to wait at.

It was no surprise to me that there were already a few ponies who also took a spot for the event. The airspace was about as clear as I expected, so I took a spot on one of the pre-placed clouds and read a novel for the time being. About an hour before the event, the place was already starting to get packed and by then my detection spell also picked up three changelings.

I kept an eye on them during the event, though I was too far away from them to pick up their emotions with my sixth sense. The crowd’s emotions were too much for me to sift through, so I decided to wait until after the event to analyze them.

The event it’s self was amazing. After Celestia gave us her speech, Twilight Sparkle came out onto the balcony. She wore an amazing dress and gave a heart melting speech that included getting her five best friends out there with her to thank them. I wasn’t sure if it was me getting the crowd’s emotions confused with my own, but I teared up when he friends appeared and cheered with the crowd.

They then went down the event area singing, but for some reason Twilight and her friends decided that it would be fun to gallop up to one of the tallest points of the castle afterward and have her fly off while finishing their song. I had no idea how they got her to fly already cause it wasn’t viewable from the event area. It could have been anything from a spell to a catapult. I also wondered if the Guard was annoyed that she did that without learning how to properly fly first.

I’ll admit that I probably should have payed a bit more attention to the disguised changelings, but I felt like seeing as much of the coronation as possible was more important. They obviously weren’t assassins, but I didn’t want them to slip out while I wasn’t looking. Luckily that wasn’t the case by the time the event was over, so I started following them.

I kept myself grounded while everybody was leaving, as my detection spell’s range wasn’t far enough to detect them from a typical cloud altitude, and without it I’d lose them in the crowd. Once the crowd was dispersed enough, I made sure to be on the other side of the road, then concentrated on analyzing their emotions.

They had the same telltale signs as the other infiltrators from the Crystal Empire. They looked like they might have been keeping an eye on each other, and their emotions towards each other confirmed that. Their emotions also confirmed the fact that each of the three felt that the other two were comrades in the strict and unique way a hive changeling would describe the word.

With that established, I casually flew up to land on a cloud and started watching them from there. I constantly but slowly moved it towards their general direction without changing altitude so they wouldn’t be as likely to notice it practically following them, and I kept watching them for a while.

The infiltrators went to get some tools such as a two-pony saw and an axe from a house, presumably one that one of their persona’s owned. After that, they left the city, went down one of the mountain’s pathways, then towards one of the closer forests. 

Upon hearing what sounded like ponies chopping trees, I decided to burrow into the cloud so I could discretely change into a unicorn then cast an invisibility spell. This way, when I slowly moved closer to them they still wouldn’t be likely to notice anything, especially with the forest being a bit dense. Overall I could see them clearly enough and confirmed that they were doing some lumberjacking.

It was here that I decided to make my first move, which had to be a surprise. I had one particular move in mind that I wally wanted to try. I knew that I’d rarely use it because the best moves for me would almost always be stealthy and I didn’t want to cause property damage. But in this case, there was no chance of it. I also had a good enough chance of knocking out out all three of the infiltrators with this move before they’d notice me in time, because of the forest’s trees, the infiltrators’ distance from each other, and how unlikely it was that my well past noon shadow would be seen if I actively avoided it.

Overall I was delighted to finally try it, but I was also a bit nervous about it. Despite the latter, I decided to use it. So first I changed back into a pegasus then performed a nonchalant fly-by a bit above the treeline to be sure that I had their exact location and didn’t get them mixed up with anybody else. Upon finishing that, I flew to a suitable cloud and changed disguises after doing some burrowing again.

While I was flying my heavy, muscular self to the highest clouds to finally begin, I took a few seconds to recall what I’ve read about the technique for a pegasus to achieve the most speed possible. I’ve practiced it some by then, though I knew I was no Rainbow Dash. Nevertheless, once I was high enough I started my downward descent.

Even with the fact that I had wings at that moment and that I was highly unlikely to get injured doing it right no matter how fast I ended up going, I couldn’t help but worry about the sheer speed I was accumulating and my altitude. My heart was pounding, there was a stone in my stomach. Yet at the same time I had a feeling of exhilaration in my chest and it only grew as I descended! Upon getting close to ground level and casting the changeling dive bomb spell, the exhilaration surprisingly outgrew my worry.

Yet the infiltrators below had only time to react, as even the most sharp of the group had only a second or less. They ended up diving out of the way as I quickly shifted into a changeling build with thick, dense chitin, which impacted the ground with enough force to practically cause an earth shattering explosion. 

Within a few seconds, in a moderately impressive crater, I stood up and quickly scanned the area with the detection spell. I noticed that I had completely buried two of them in dirt and that one of those two were unconscious, yet I couldn’t find the third.

Though that mystery was soon answered for me, as the third one’s forelegs came up and took hold of my hind legs. I instinctively reacted by taking his forelegs in my magic, pulling him out as easily as an adult dragon, then throwing him at a tree with equal ease. Remembering that at least one of the other buried ones were still conscious, I quickly took a look at the other two to see that one had just breached the ground’s surface.

I started for him while his horn was already charged for an attack, and while I tried to dodge it, I failed and took a moderate crack in my right foreleg chitin. Yet with no more than a slight trip, I was fast enough to get in range and pull the changeling out of the dirt. Having one of them restricted in my magic, I turned to check on the one I threw at a tree, who turned out to have gotten up and started casting what looked like a fire-portal spell. So I rushed to him with a slight hobble, while keeping the one in my magic facing away from me so he wouldn’t be able to hit me with projectile spells as easily. Getting within range of him, I took his head in my magic and buried it in the dirt to both keep him from casting any offensive spells and completing the fire-portal.

After casting the disguise dispel and interrogation stun on the two, I distorted my voice as I did with the infiltrators in the Crystal Empire. Interrogation preparations completed, I pulled the one with his head in the dirt out and propped the two upright against a tree, saying to both of them “If you cast any spells at all, you’re going to get a strike on the horn.”

As I sat down in front of them they just cowered in fake fear, though I took it as acknowledgment and they knew it, so I continued. “I am looking for a specific changeling of the hive that crashed into an apartment near the start of the Canterlot invasion. He likely saw a pony with mostly winter colors. Do you know of any such changeling?”

After a few seconds of more fake, yet impressively convincing fear from the two infiltrators, I added “And you can stop with the innocent cowering act," which they did.

Though the first one to say anything told me, “I'd rather die than tell you anything about any hive member, you freak," in a cold tone. From their emotions, I was sure that they didn’t know anything about it, but it didn’t hurt to try a bit harder.

I clarified with, “While I do not plan on killing you, I could spare you the humiliating fate of being turned in to the Guard by a mere infiltrator who has not even had half a year of training.”

The other infiltrator responded with, “As if you’re just going to let us leave.”

“I never said that," I told them. “You would go back to the hive sometime soon.”

Amusement grew on the first infiltrator’s face and he told me, “You’d have to do a lot more than that for us to even tell you how long we’ve been infiltrators.”

At this point I decided to move on to something else, at least for the time being, so I laid down on my side. “It would be interesting to know the history of why the hive's been keeping it's self secluded for so long.”

“You don’t need to know that," the first changeling sneered.

His response didn’t change my pondering expression as I told them, “I am not necessarily looking for an answer from you two. But where to begin? Let us start with the root of your problems. Most of you do not think for yourselves enough.”

The second changeling became irritated by that, but he didn’t show it as he responded. “We do. We can perfectly blend into pony society.”

“And yet all hive changelings believe the same thing about ponies,” I reminded them. “Who taught you those beliefs? Your government, and knowing how it works, Chrysalis. It is no surprise that when Chrysalis is wrong, it is dangerous for a hive changeling such as you two to be right. But as infiltrators, you should know from even before living among ponies that the art of progress is to preserve order amid change and preserve change amid order.” I raised an eyebrow as I asked “Can you claim that the hive has had any progress in the past months?”

“You’re not tricking us into giving away hive secrets," the first infiltrator remarked. 

Despite their refusal to talk about the hive at all, I could tell that they had doubts about the hive. I had planted a small seed in them and I decided to keep feeding it.

“Chrysalis has only tried to keep order, with no room for change and very little individuality. So because of that, she is making peaceful revolution impossible, which can only lead to an undesirably violent revolution. This is why changelings are starting to leave the hive, and are no longer comfortable with the direction Chrysalis is taking it.”

The second infiltrator cut in with, “Those traitors can’t live like a real changeling because they’re weak. They’ve been lured and trapped into pony society by everything that makes them lazy and soft!”

I countered with, “But did you forget who keeps telling you that? Who is it that keeps the hive from believing anything else? Nearly all hive changelings believe the same things, because everything else is considered heresy by Chrysalis. This stops anyone from getting further than anyone else, because no one in the hive walks their own path to discover things no other changeling has discovered before that would benefit the hive. When was the last time anybody but Chrysalis decided to do something significantly different for any reason other than necessity?”

“Progress only matters when it’s necessary," the second infiltrator retorted with a look of faltering scrutiny. They were trying to change the subject, but it wouldn’t help them. I had the creativity and philosophical mindset to bring the subject back and use their retorts conversational momentum against them, like I was a master of verbal Aikido.

“And yet more of your hive will continue to leave with every passing day because that is true. They are not just leaving because Chrysalis refuses to accept any new way, or out of lack of change. They do it because they know that everything she is accepting is leading to the hive’s self destruction and that they strive to be everything that leads to the hive’s salvation. They are doing it because they know what progress is necessary. If you think any of this is a lie, then waltz right on into Equestria as a changeling.”

By then I could start to see a tiny bit of doubt in their faces, though I knew how much they actually had was moderate. So it was no surprise when the second infiltrator cautiously and doubtfully asked, “How would one even do that in a preferable way?”

I decided that leaving them with unanswered questions would only grow the doubt I put in them. So my response to the question was to get up while charging a spell and say, “That, my dear infiltrator, is one of the right questions," then cast a full stun on them both.

“Just like the infiltrator ice pops, I’ll settle on you two delivering a message to the hive," I told them, as I started making the cocoons. I knew the joke was bad. In fact, I did it just to irritate them.

After completing the cocoon I crafted my usual resin slab messages, which included "You are running on empty, running blind" and "You are slaves to the pink gold because of your queen." I then stuck one to each of the infiltrators’ backs, put them in the cocoons, then buried the cocoons just enough to have a small portion of them above ground.

Upon transforming into a pegasus, my chitin injury translated into a small bone fracture, so before flying off I applied a local anesthetic spell to it. It wouldn’t take too long to heal seeing as my body had a new innate healing magic that came from the transformation potion incident. It was only about one third as fast as the average changeling’s, but it was a bit more efficient with it’s emotion energy consumption. Hopefully it would be fast enough to heal to the point that I could hide it before seeing Modus or Blitz again.

After a few minutes of flying away, I realized that I forgot about the third infiltrator, who was probably still unconscious. Though I decided that it wouldn’t matter much, as it would be better to let that one wake up to discover his fellow changelings in their current state.

~~~~~~

After going straight home I went to work on the usual potions and spell research, and a few hours after twilight someone rang the doorbell. I didn’t expect anyone to come by at that time, so I started my detection spell to see that it was a disguised changeling. From the spell’s silhouette it didn’t look like anypony that I knew, and I remained cautious when I answered the door.

Upon opening it I was met with a unicorn mare that had a purple coat, light blue eyes, moderately messy pink mane, and a sideways picture frame cutie mark. I had a decent skill in recognizing ponies that I hadn’t seen in years, yet even without the cutie mark I knew who it was likely supposed to be. I was surprised that an infiltrator would try this on me already, and I was also sure that I wasn’t giving off quite as much surprise as I should have to keep my cover from him.

“Crooked Gallery?" I breathlessly asked.

The changeling awkwardly answered with “I’m not surprised you recognize me. Can I come in?”

I put on a small smile. “Yeah, sure.”

But once he was in and the door closed, my expression turned intense as I took a hold of the changeling in his entirety with my magic and dispelled the disguise. 

While I took him upstairs, I started interrogating him with, “Who are you and why are you using a disguise that’s obviously a grown up version of a marefriend I once had?”

The changeling responded with some fear, sadness, a lot of surprise, but no words until I arrived at my bedroom’s doorway. “You’re a vir-”

“And how would you know?" I demanded before he could finish.

He cautiously responded with “Because you told me… several years ago” as we both lingered in the doorway.

I wasn’t willing to believe what he was implying, so I finished entering my room and asked him “Who was the only pony that had ever punched me in the crotch in my last few school years?”

The changeling raised an eyebrow and asked “Why ask something like that?”

“Because it’s almost completely useless info for one infiltrator to pass on to another.”

This seemed like a good enough answer for him, and he answered my question with “Your loveable scoundrel friend with the white coat and grey-blue mane.”

The only marefriend I ever had was a changeling the entire time.

I never expected nor prepared for that in any way. I was surprised and confused, fearful and a little sad. So I let him go from my magic and went to the window to pretend that it’s view was more important.

Despite that, I managed to ask “What was the real reason you left?”

Crooked Gallery felt ashamed to have to tell me, but he did. “I was an infiltrator in training. I was assigned to be somepony’s marefriend for at least half a year, and I faked my attraction and affection towards you. But as an infiltrator I grew too confident. After being with you for a few weeks I thought that finding a genuine pony and changeling-like appreciation for any given pony would help me immensely with blending in. It helped, but I didn’t notice that I was doing it too much until I realized that many of the feelings I had for you slowly changed from fake to real.”

“At that point I decided that I had to leave before I became too attached, so I did. While back at the hive I slowly started feeling more and more awful for some reason and I didn’t know why. I realized after a year that I was feeling sad and regretful about it, and I tried to just deal with it for several more months until I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to find you.”

Despite being a mess of emotions that neither I nor Gallery could read, he still continued and I still felt compelled to listen for reasons I was unsure of. “I severed all communications with the hive and searched for a few years with no luck. By then I was regretting my choice and I gave up, until I heard about Twilight’s ascension. After attending the coronation, my determination to find you was renewed and I began again. Changelings being known to ponies made it much easier to find you. You were accused several times of being one for all the reasons you probably already know.”

By then I had turned my head to look right at Gallery, though my only question at the moment was, “What’s your real name?”

“Hamartia," he answered. A moment of silence followed, during which he could sense my interest, so he elaborated. “After my… failure as an infiltrator they changed my name to that. Some also called me Hubris. The hive saw my growing empathy for ponies as weak and saw it fitting. They said that they’d never even let me be a guard and reassigned me to a digging team.”

He was starting to tear up a bit and stopped looking at me. I could tell he was genuine about everything as he continued. “I’m just… I’m so sorry for leaving you like I did. I don’t expect you to forgive me, if ever.”

I wordlessly gave him my sympathies and told him “It doesn’t matter," though it confused him.

He looked back at me again. “But why are you… such a mess to read?”

I took several seconds to try and put it the right way and ended up with “It’s the way I think about who I want and should to be with.”

“Is it because I’m a changeling?” Hamartia asked. He was terrified of what I would say to that, and who could blame him? I used to hate everything with chitin.

I told him, “No, I’m used to changelings by now," with a small smile, though Hamartia was still confused. My smile faded as I said, “I don’t care what species you are, but… I think I care about the gender.”

His confusion grew at that, and he became a bit sad and fearful again. Though he still managed to take a few steps towards me and say “I just wanted to apologize. I didn’t think you and I would get back together again…”

“I’m not sure if I’d want that," I said.

He was moderately surprised at the implication so he asked “Why are you still considering it?”

“If you want it, I’m willing to consider trying it.”

At this, Hamartia got right behind me and hugged me. I was startled and jumped at it a bit. He didn’t let go, but I quickly relaxed and a few seconds later my eyes were closed and he was petting my mane. At this point I closed the window blinds.

I would say that it was just like a few years ago, but his chitin made it feel so much different. Yet at the same time, everything that I knew he felt for me was still there from when I was in school because of the way he hugged me, more clear than ever.

And it made me tear up more than he thought.

“A few years later and you still care too much about what other ponies think, but you’re still just as forgiving," Hamartia mentioned.

“Yeah," was the only thing I could say to that.

“It’s nice, but I don’t care much about getting back together.”

I didn’t exactly know how long we stayed like that for, but I was sure it wasn’t more than a minute.

“Lier," I suddenly but softly told him.

Despite all the infiltrator training he had, he couldn’t hide the fact that he had many of the same feelings as I did for the time we spent together. At the time we were both the closest we had ever been to someone.

Hamartia stopped petting me and rested his chin on my shoulders, telling me “I don’t expect you to believe me so often or even trust me after being the kind of first marefriend that plays with her stallion’s emotions.”

He got it all wrong. “No, it’s… I might as well tell you a recent secret.”

“You’re a changeling?" he asked.

I turned my head and he got his off my shoulders to look at my face. In a serious tone I said, “You have to Pinkie Promise not to tell anyone without asking me first.”

He quickly gained a serious composure and wordlessly did all the motions involved in said promise ritual.

“I was there when the changelings attacked Canterlot," I told him. “I don’t remember what happened after I noticed it happening through my window, but I woke up to being half changeling the next day.”

Hamartia froze in sympathetic horror.

“It was in the middle of me working on the potion I always said I’d make one day. I should have been more careful with it.”

Hamartia managed to say “I don’t think it’s your fault. You were the kind of pony that was always been careful when you needed to be.”

I smiled a bit a that. “I still am. But sometimes I feel like it is.”

“Well, actually, what do you call yourself? What do you call half changelings?" he asked with much interest.

“I call myself a half-ling," I simply stated.

“Can I see what you look like now?”

“I probably shouldn’t," I told him in a moderately serious tone. “You might get in danger if I do. Just knowing what I am is bad enough right now.”

“I think you’re overreacting a bit, Shape," he said with an encouraging smile.

“The hive is probably trying to find me out for messing with them. They’d come for you if they found out that you knew my secret.”

Hamartia was in complete shock. I told him, “Everyone that knew me before the Canterlot attack would react similarly to me telling them that I’m trying to be a hero. Some already have.”

He then managed to ask, “You already told some ponies? What did you do to the hive to make yourself one of their main priorities?”

“I really shouldn’t tell you any more than I already have," I seriously told him.

Just then, Frost wandered into the room. Hamartia stared at him as he went to me and bunted my cheek while purring.

“Okay, you can’t really be Shapeshift," Hamartia said.

I gave an amused snort at that, and Hamartia asked, “Is he this friendly with everypony?”

“Pretty much with everybody," I said. “Even if he’s annoyed.”

So Hamartia decided, with some reluctance, to let Frost sniff his hoof. Frost did so then started looking at the window shades, probably wondering what was currently on the other side. Hamartia took it as an invitation to touch him, so he started petting him.

“I didn’t think you could find a friendly cat this big," he thought out loud.

“I raised him to be like that after I spotted him at Fluttershy’s cottage," I explained as we both pet him.

Hamartia gave me a smile as he said, “Fluttershy. That explains a lot. I didn’t know you wanted a cat the size of yourself.”

“I didn’t know until I met him," I responded, as Frost bunted my cheek again.

“Do you have to let him outside every once in a while?”

“I bring him to a park at least once a week.”

“You probably get a lot of questions about him," Hamartia wondered. “Have you used it as an opportunity to pick up mares?”

“I haven’t dated anybody since you left," was my response, which concerned him. “I decided to focus more on my studies, then on starting a carrier and getting my life in decent order. But the half-ling thing happened pretty much right after that and I’m trying to… figure that out before dating again.”

Hamartia praised me with, “I think it’s good that you’re trying to keep your priorities straight.” He then grew a bit nervous. “We… can at least be friends for now, right?”

I gave another small smile. “I’d like that, but…”

He sighed and told me, “It can’t be too dangerous," in a reassuring smile.

“You’re an ex-infiltrator. You knew something was up with me before I even told you. If the hive suspected me, they’d find out who my friends are and try to use them. That would include you. If you aren’t at least in a disguise to hide your identity from them and my other friends, they’d attempt to interrogate you before asking anyone else because they’d know how likely it is for you to have more info on me than my other friends would combined.”

“Have you been getting some kind of infiltrator training?" he asked.

Though I ignored the question and continued.

“Just use some kind of disguise and try not to be seen with me too often until my problem with the hive is over for the most part.”

Hamartia stopped petting Frost and gave me a serious look “Shape, I’ve kept my infiltration skills sharp after leaving the hive. If I got tangled up in your trouble I’d be able to handle it well enough. Which reminds me, how did you find out so quickly that I was a changeling?”

After letting out a sigh of slight irritation, I told him “That’s a secret as well. Can you stop asking about the dangerous side of me?”

Though he kept pushing. “But why can’t you give that information to the Guard? However you’re doing it, it’s something they could really use!”

“I don’t quite think the Guard should know it yet.”

“But it would make it a snap to find every changeling in Equestria!" he almost begged.

“It would also be a privacy concern.”

It was Hamartia’s turn to sigh. “Fine, fine… I should be heading out anyways.” He gave me a small smile and said “It was nice doing some catching up with you, even if we’re both messes right now.”

I could sense that he was trying to be humorous, so I returned his smile. He then hoofed me a paper which had his address on it. 

“In case you ever want or need it," he told me, before trying to put his Gallery disguise back on. “I, uh… the dispel is keeping me from using my disguises. I’ll just fire-portal out.”

He started on the spell, but stopped after a second and asked me, “Can we catch up some more later on? Maybe about more bright topics?”

“I go to a bar called ‘The Fairly Odd Pub’ with my friends not long after sunset every weekend. Just go disguised for everyone’s safety," I said.

Hamartia cheerfully said, “I’m fine with that," then we said our goodbyes and Hamartia left by fire-portal.

Though while I was working on my changeling capturing arsenal of spells a few minutes later, I realized that we didn’t agree on what disguise he was going to use. I wasn’t going to find it any fun to figure out if the mystery pony that was going to join our group was Hamartia or not.

Upon going to bed, Frost laid next to me as usual, so I pet his belly while thinking.

Hamartia says that he doesn't care about dating me anymore, but I could sense some love from him, directed at me. Maybe he doesn't want me to worry about it, or he's embarrassed about it? No, I didn't sense any embarrassment, but I did sense care and some worry. Maybe he doesn't know that he still loves me, and he's confused about his emotions towards me right now. If he is, I can't blame him. I'm about as confused as he is.

If he cares and worries about me enough, to not want me worrying about choosing whether or not to date him again, then maybe I had a bit more influence on his change than I thought. Either way, he still loves me a little. I feel like I could still love him, yet I'm sure I don't bat for that team. I also feel a bit obligated to try it because of our past, but it would probably end up with one of us changing to the other gender at times. I wouldn't want that because that would make one of us look shallow no matter if it was me or him, and the other would feel disappointed or inadequate. How could I possibly approach this in a way that would work out for the best?

This makes me wonder how many more changelings in disguise I've befriended, too...

Upon falling asleep, I had the Boulevard Dream again yet I still couldn’t figure it out. I knew it was important, not just because it obviously had to do with how I was feeling recently, but also because it was reoccurring. My mind could have even been warning me of something. 

Though I put those thoughts aside after I got out of bed to head right over to Cordial’s store. Upon entering it, he was dealing with a customer that wanted to return a product for some reason or another. I decided to just browse out of boredom while waiting for them to be done with the exchange, and a few minutes later I came back to him.

The stallion was gone, so I told him, “Hey Cordial. Remember that one thing I wanted to hold off on?”

It took him just a few seconds to remember what I was referring to and he confirmed, so he led me into his office.

Upon closing the door, I hoofed him the bits and the message for the pony or changeling, which said that I’d be at a specific park at noon to one every Sunday and to look for a mare with a purple coat and black mane.

“I actually asked around in the gray market for changelings that would deliver the message upon meeting the mare, and the average price was about what I told you," Cordial mentioned. “You sure you want to spend this much on a message? You can trust the couriers, but I still feel like there’s a better way to do this.”

His questioning of what I was doing and getting into was getting a bit irritating again. “Yeah, I’m sure. You should know by now that I’m also using other methods to contact her as soon as I can. I’m still looking around for her myself.”

I could see and, to a lesser extent, sense that he was going to say something about that, but he decided against it. Instead he simply told me, “I’ll have it delivered to the changelings as soon as I see any of them.”

“Alright. Do you still remember that mare’s voice and accent? I might need a description of that as well. Also, anything about the way she acts would help too.”

“From what I remember, her voice was quiet but aggressive while her demeanor was about the same. She was overall gothic and likely a bit sadistic.”

I said, “Thanks. I’ve got nothing else so I’ll see you later," then left the office and went back home.